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♪ Adventure Time ♪
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♪ Come on, grab your friends ♪
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♪ We'll go to very distant lands ♪
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♪ With Jake the Dog
and Finn the Human ♪
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♪ The fun will never end ♪
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♪ It's Adventure Time ♪
Ripped By mstoll
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Nice.
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Little bird family on vacay.
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Daddy's got the mad-beautiful
tail feathers.
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Mommy's taking up the rear
all plain-Jane styles.
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Glad I get
to date a beautiful Rainicorn...
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not some nasty bird.
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Hey!
Don't be talking trash!
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Our ladies are beautiful
on the inside, you creep!
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All lady birds around
the whole world
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are beautiful on the inside?
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- Yes.
- Fair enough.
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Special delivery
for Jake the Dog.
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Cool. Thanks.
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Hmm.
"Urgent."
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Hold still, BMO!
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Ouch!
I hurt my butt sledding.
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Oh, dang.
Sorry, BMO.
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Cool, man!
I'm excited!
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What the heck
am I looking at?
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Jake Jr?
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What's going on here?
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Jake the Dog, we have your daughter.
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She is safe for now.
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What do you want
from me?
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We need you to reassemble
your old team
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Gareth, A.K.A.
The Lady Master...
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The Flying Lettuce Brothers,
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notorious conmen
impressionists...
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and your old friend Tiffany.
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Globbit.
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You will need them to break
into the royal candy vault
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and steal this.
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The baker's shard...
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the purest source of sugar
in the known regions.
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You are the only master thief
with the skills to swipe it.
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You have until midnight
to make the drop.
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Tell anyone,
and Jake Jr. Gets it.
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BMO...
destroy the tape.
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Are we on the level,
BMO?
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I ain't no clown-town snitch,
baby.
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I don't want Finn
hearing about this.
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All right.
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Oh, Brunard, are you sure?
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Yeah, babe.
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I'm totally famous,
and you love me.
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W-What's happening?
What am I feeling now?
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You are under the spell
of my face.
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I got you, girl,
in my face trap,
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and you love it.
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I... do.
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Brunard,
don't ever leave me.
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I'll give you everything...
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my fabrics,
my dress patterns,
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my marbles,
my social standing.
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Whoops! I gotta go.
Laters!
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Dine and dash? I saw that!
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- Hey, boss, I wanted to...
- Shut up, Tonya.
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I gotta see my ex-wife!
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Ohh.
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Hello.
Squeezy Mart.
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Tonya, this is your boss!
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Wait.
You were just here.
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Yeah! Now I'm on the phone,
stupid!
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Hey, do you think
I could leave early?
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I'm, like, depressed.
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What you could do is take all
the money out of the register
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and give it to the two guys
out back by the dumpster!
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Okay.
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Then can I go?
- Yes.
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Here you go, dudes.
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Thanks, man.
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- Peace.
- Goodbye, fair lad.
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The master returns!
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Well, well.
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From the shadows of dream,
the dog wakes to find its...
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uh...
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the dog wakes
to find its mangy tail
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flopping in the dust
like a fish in a tree.
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That fish is me...
Tiffany!
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I'm coming, Jake!
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I'm coming!
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Hi, guys.
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Were you waiting for me
in the dark?
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Tiffany wouldn't let us
turn them on.
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Never mind that!
The real question is...
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what's that slo-mo Finn
know about this?
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Hey, BMO, where's Jake?
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Jake got back
with his old gang
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and is going to rob
the Candy Kingdom.
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Okay, BMO.
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You want to join
my primitive noise band?
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Huhhhh?
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No.
I like organized sound.
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Pshh!
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♪ ♪
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La-la-la!
Whoo!
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Nah, BMO's covering
for me.
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So, what's the deal, Jake?
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Yeah, why'd you
call us back?
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I got a job
for you guys.
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One last score...
the big one.
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The baker's shard?
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Are you for real, man?
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Hey, that's crazy, Jake.
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We always said,
"play it safe."
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Can't you see, guys?
He's desperate.
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Somebody got to him
'cause he's soft now.
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What the...
pshh!
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Tiffany!
I'm the same Jake!
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I just stopped stealing,
mostly.
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Because when you get older,
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you're supposed to get into
other stuff,
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like graphic design
or pottery.
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It's called "growing up"!
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I don't wanna do poetry...
I mean, pottery.
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Dude! Are you guys
on board or what?
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You really got something
better to do?
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Really?
I know you don't, Tiffany!
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Glom you, Jake.
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How are we gonna split
the baker's shard?
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We ain't keeping it.
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I'm passing the shard off
to a mystery dude.
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What the?
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The dude has my kid.
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My little Jake Jr.
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I'm in.
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We're in.
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I know that vault
inside and out...
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every guard rotation,
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every camera,
every deadly trap.
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And that safe is
locked up so tight,
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it makes me wanna
spit out my guts
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and cry about it.
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Do you even have a plan,
Jake?
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I have the first part.
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Okay, let's freakin' do this!
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Captain, the milk delivery
has arrived.
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Well, check them in,
Private.
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Yes, sir.
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And, Private,
I'm very thirsty.
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Bring me back the most delicious
flavor they have.
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Yes, sir!
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Huh?
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Now, what in the heck?
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I'm back with your milk, sir.
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What flavor did you bring me,
private?
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Banana, sir!
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- What?
- Banana milk!
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Blagh! No!
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The forbidden flavor!
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It's...
delicious.
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It's... it's... it's...
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It's delicious!
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Attention, all guards!
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You are directed to report
immediately to the courtyard
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for special training!
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Okay, do your thing,
man.
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Just like old times,
right, Jake?
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When we were blood,
we'd follow each other
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into the jaws of death
on a pale horse.
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Not now, Tiffany.
Come on!
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Ugh!
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Today, we'll be working on
our battle "keeyahs."
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Okay, men! Sound off!
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All right, soldiers, time to
shred those pipes!
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I wanna hear you scream!
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Louder! Push it hard!
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The baker's shard is on
the other side of that...
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the corridor
of a thousand deaths.
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Whoa!
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Whoa!
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Whoa!
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Yow!
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Wow!
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Whoa!
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Whew!
I did it!
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For Jake Jr.!
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Stop right there.
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You!
Where's my daughter?
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Throw me the bakers shard,
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and I'll let her go.
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Yeah, right!
That's super-dumb!
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Daddy! Please do what he says!
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00:09:07,246 --> 00:09:08,907
Hang on, sweetie!
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Ungh!
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Thank you for saving me...
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Daddy!
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You dirty...
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Now...
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00:09:21,427 --> 00:09:23,327
uh...
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I'm the dog,
and you're the tail!
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Now you chase me!
You chase my dreams!
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Alert. Security breach.
Alert.
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00:09:45,484 --> 00:09:48,385
Jake Jr.!
201
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Oh, crud!
Jake! I love you!
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I love yo-o-o-o-u!
203
00:10:01,367 --> 00:10:04,302
Shut it, Tiffany!
Give me my daughter!
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Ta-da!
205
00:10:06,238 --> 00:10:08,468
I totally double-crossed you!
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00:10:08,541 --> 00:10:12,637
Jake Jr?
What the puke, girl?
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00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:14,043
Let's get out of here!
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00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:19,981
What the funky fresh,
honey?
209
00:10:20,052 --> 00:10:22,020
I just wanted to be
like you.
210
00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:25,080
Mom told me stories
about when you did crimes.
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That was a long time ago...
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00:10:27,159 --> 00:10:29,286
before I knew it was
wrong!
213
00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:31,557
I thought you'd be
proud of me.
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00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:36,099
I am.
215
00:10:36,168 --> 00:10:38,762
I couldn't have done that
when I was your age.
216
00:10:38,838 --> 00:10:41,329
I age fast, remember?
I'm 22!
217
00:10:41,407 --> 00:10:43,500
Right.
I keep forgetting maths.
218
00:10:43,576 --> 00:10:45,567
What are you gonna do
about the old crew?
219
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:47,670
Finn and I will bust
their apples tomorrow.
220
00:10:47,747 --> 00:10:49,305
Or maybe the banana guards
will get 'em.
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00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:53,284
Wee-ooh! Wee-ooh! Wee-ooh!
222
00:10:53,352 --> 00:10:55,217
Come on.
I'll take you home now.
223
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:58,347
- I love you, pops.
- I love you, too.
224
00:10:58,424 --> 00:11:00,585
Don't stinkin' do this
to me again.
225
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,493
I'm old and fat. I'll probably
have a heart attack.
226
00:11:03,562 --> 00:11:04,824
Okay.
227
00:11:04,897 --> 00:11:06,091
Wait a minute!
228
00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:08,656
You're doing a long con
right now, aren't you?
229
00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:10,258
No.
230
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:11,268
Yes.
231
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:12,497
Now I'm really proud of you!
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00:11:14,940 --> 00:11:18,967
♪ Come along with me ♪
233
00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:22,845
♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪
234
00:11:22,915 --> 00:11:26,442
♪ We can wander through the forest ♪
235
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:30,922
♪ And do so as we please ♪
236
00:11:30,990 --> 00:11:34,721
♪ Come along with me ♪
237
00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:41,661
♪ To a cliff under a tree ♪
Ripped By mstoll