1 00:00:03,982 --> 00:00:06,593 Ugh, I'm tired of being out here. 2 00:00:06,637 --> 00:00:08,464 I wanna go home. 3 00:00:08,508 --> 00:00:11,032 Eww, Earth? In space we can do whatever 4 00:00:11,076 --> 00:00:13,687 the hell we want with basically no responsibilities. 5 00:00:13,731 --> 00:00:15,733 Kind of my point. Maybe I'm ready to start 6 00:00:15,776 --> 00:00:18,605 having a real life instead of being stuck here with your ass. 7 00:00:18,649 --> 00:00:21,739 Shh, my ass might hear you, and it's very sensitive. 8 00:00:21,782 --> 00:00:24,524 - Of course, you know that. - Not engaging. 9 00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:26,961 I'm just saying, maybe it's time to hang this all up and... 10 00:00:27,005 --> 00:00:29,834 Ugh, is this about your aching uterus again? 11 00:00:29,877 --> 00:00:31,749 Okay, who said anything about... 12 00:00:31,792 --> 00:00:33,838 Well, we haven't talked about settling down but... 13 00:00:33,881 --> 00:00:35,796 - Nope. - Key word "settling." 14 00:00:35,840 --> 00:00:36,927 I'm down with going to Earth. 15 00:00:36,928 --> 00:00:38,973 I could use some fresh faces to bang. 16 00:00:39,017 --> 00:00:43,717 And our bar stock is so low, I may have to resort to beer. 17 00:00:43,761 --> 00:00:45,196 Has everyone gone crazy? 18 00:00:45,197 --> 00:00:47,982 We're on the final frontier and you want to go back 19 00:00:48,026 --> 00:00:50,724 to doing day jobs and gravity-laden sex? 20 00:00:50,768 --> 00:00:52,944 - Not my first preference. - I vote with Archer. 21 00:00:52,987 --> 00:00:55,773 - Robots don't get a vote. - I prefer "synthetic human." 22 00:00:56,948 --> 00:00:59,298 No one gets to vote. I'm the captain. 23 00:00:59,341 --> 00:01:02,127 Co-captain. And as the other co-captain, 24 00:01:02,170 --> 00:01:04,172 I am setting a course for Earth. 25 00:01:04,216 --> 00:01:08,524 No, Lana, I will not let you hyperspace us to Boring-town. 26 00:01:10,831 --> 00:01:12,790 What the... ow! 27 00:01:12,833 --> 00:01:18,783 - Holy spacesnacks! - It's a Dri'n battle cruiser. 28 00:01:19,231 --> 00:01:21,407 And somehow it hasn't noticed us. 29 00:01:21,450 --> 00:01:24,802 No, we're too close for its long-range scanners to pick us up. 30 00:01:24,845 --> 00:01:26,673 Great, let's just loop around this bad boy 31 00:01:26,717 --> 00:01:28,762 and hyperspace somewhere that is not Earth. 32 00:01:28,806 --> 00:01:31,004 If we can destroy it, we will cripple 33 00:01:31,039 --> 00:01:33,810 - pirate activity in this sector. - Who cares? 34 00:01:33,811 --> 00:01:37,074 And collecta 30 million credit bounty for taking it out. 35 00:01:37,075 --> 00:01:40,796 As I was saying, who cares about combatting 36 00:01:40,797 --> 00:01:44,472 - space piracy more than me? - Exactly. 37 00:01:44,473 --> 00:01:48,042 The very reasonable reward is just icing on the cake. 38 00:01:48,086 --> 00:01:51,044 - Guys, as captain of this ship... - Co-captain. 39 00:01:51,045 --> 00:01:52,830 I am making an executive decision. 40 00:01:52,873 --> 00:01:56,703 - We're taking out that Dri'n bastard. - Like I already executively decided. 41 00:01:56,747 --> 00:01:59,271 Hands in. "Space cowboys" on three. 42 00:01:59,314 --> 00:02:01,863 One, two... 43 00:02:03,884 --> 00:02:06,543 What the hell are you doing? 44 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:14,074 Watch Movies, TV Series and Live Sports Signup Here -> WWW.ADMITME.APP 45 00:02:38,851 --> 00:02:41,884 10x07 - Space Pirates 46 00:02:42,437 --> 00:02:45,773 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 47 00:02:45,954 --> 00:02:48,298 Okay, here's the plan: after we board the ship, 48 00:02:48,299 --> 00:02:51,698 knock out a couple of Dri'n guards, and then... you'll love this... 49 00:02:51,742 --> 00:02:54,049 - put on their clothes... - Not to be a buzzkill, 50 00:02:54,092 --> 00:02:56,921 but you think there'll really be a plus-sized pirate onboard? 51 00:02:56,965 --> 00:03:00,142 - Ugh, this is a horrible plan. - I'm not finished. 52 00:03:00,185 --> 00:03:02,274 Pam, you'll be our "prisoner." 53 00:03:02,318 --> 00:03:03,928 - Sweet! - Lucky. 54 00:03:03,972 --> 00:03:06,148 - Still a horrible plan. - Let me finish! 55 00:03:06,191 --> 00:03:10,065 We'll infiltrate the ship disguised as Dri'n guards. 56 00:03:11,109 --> 00:03:12,981 That's it. That's the whole plan. 57 00:03:13,024 --> 00:03:16,767 This is not a plan. This is the plot of several famous films. 58 00:03:16,810 --> 00:03:18,410 Well, why do you think they're famous, Lana? 59 00:03:18,421 --> 00:03:20,379 We'll need Ray to get us some explosives. 60 00:03:20,423 --> 00:03:22,338 He's taking a sick day. 61 00:03:22,381 --> 00:03:23,981 - Of course he is. - We get those? 62 00:03:23,992 --> 00:03:25,776 It's a miracle we don't crash into the sun 63 00:03:25,819 --> 00:03:30,085 with all you Sick Day Cyrils and Personal Day Pams. 64 00:03:30,128 --> 00:03:33,074 It is a pretty generous package if you use it right. 65 00:03:33,117 --> 00:03:34,219 Space phrasing. 66 00:03:34,263 --> 00:03:35,785 Well, where am I supposed to get explosives? 67 00:03:35,786 --> 00:03:39,007 "Thermite" be something I can do to help. 68 00:03:39,050 --> 00:03:41,226 Referencing thermite explosives. 69 00:03:41,270 --> 00:03:43,359 I did not enjoy that. 70 00:03:43,402 --> 00:03:44,837 Does this thing havean off switch? 71 00:03:44,838 --> 00:03:48,581 - Aww, I have feelings. - Volume control? Anything? 72 00:03:48,625 --> 00:03:50,627 Then we'll plant the thermite all over the ship 73 00:03:50,670 --> 00:03:53,108 and "hola explosivo." 74 00:03:53,151 --> 00:03:55,458 - I'm confused. - It's Spanish, Pam. 75 00:03:55,501 --> 00:03:57,634 No, how will we get the "Seamus" out of here 76 00:03:57,677 --> 00:03:59,113 without us pinging their scanners? 77 00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:00,679 That's where Cyril and Carol come in. 78 00:04:00,680 --> 00:04:03,248 You two will disable the radar system on board. 79 00:04:03,292 --> 00:04:05,424 - Whoo-hoo! - Please don't. 80 00:04:05,468 --> 00:04:09,689 - I can disable the radar system! - Can you disable yourself? 81 00:04:09,733 --> 00:04:12,823 - Beep, bop, boop. Ya burnt. - Why not Krieger? 82 00:04:12,866 --> 00:04:14,651 I mean, he's qualified even if he is a replicant. 83 00:04:14,694 --> 00:04:18,263 Thank you, Lana, but I like to think I'm more of a Repli-can. 84 00:04:18,307 --> 00:04:20,048 No bots. 85 00:04:20,091 --> 00:04:22,920 - Mother, you stay and run comms. - Stay here? 86 00:04:22,964 --> 00:04:26,010 With the liquor? Well, if you insist. 87 00:04:26,054 --> 00:04:29,057 Space cowboys, let's ride! 88 00:04:29,300 --> 00:04:32,147 Would you stop trying to make "space cowboys" stick? 89 00:04:32,190 --> 00:04:33,538 - It isn't. - Fine, Lana. 90 00:04:33,539 --> 00:04:35,411 You stay here and be the world-weary 91 00:04:35,454 --> 00:04:37,717 space saloon/brothel madam. 92 00:04:37,761 --> 00:04:40,285 - I wanna be a brothel madam! - Ooh, I... I could be the banker 93 00:04:40,329 --> 00:04:41,764 and wear one of those green visors. 94 00:04:41,765 --> 00:04:44,246 Everybody stop making this stick! 95 00:04:44,399 --> 00:04:46,619 And if anything, I would be co-sheriff. 96 00:04:46,662 --> 00:04:49,403 - That's not a thing. - The whole thing's not a thing! 97 00:04:49,404 --> 00:04:50,883 Whoa, space cowboys. 98 00:04:50,884 --> 00:04:53,278 - What is it now, Krieger? - I've got helpful gadgets! 99 00:04:53,321 --> 00:04:54,843 Like these voice changers! 100 00:04:54,844 --> 00:04:56,846 The Dri'n tongue is a beast, you know. 101 00:04:56,890 --> 00:04:59,849 Fine, but honestly, Krieger, this is all a little thirsty. 102 00:04:59,893 --> 00:05:03,080 - Like Lana's ovaries. - Not engaging. 103 00:05:03,115 --> 00:05:07,248 Doesn't someone need to be proposing before you're engaging? 104 00:05:07,292 --> 00:05:10,947 - Not en... - She totally disarmed your phrase. 105 00:05:10,991 --> 00:05:14,204 So what's our plan when these shitty voicechangers don't work? 106 00:05:14,239 --> 00:05:15,255 - I can hear you. - Well, I picked up 107 00:05:15,256 --> 00:05:16,866 some phrases banging a pirate or two. 108 00:05:16,910 --> 00:05:19,391 Here's how to say, "Faster, harder." 109 00:05:19,434 --> 00:05:22,785 Because that'll come in handy. 110 00:05:22,829 --> 00:05:26,049 Now you try it. 111 00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:29,401 No, it's more like... you know the sound you make 112 00:05:29,444 --> 00:05:32,099 after letting out a fart you've been holding in all day? 113 00:05:32,143 --> 00:05:33,753 Oh, please. You've never held in a fart 114 00:05:33,796 --> 00:05:36,999 - in your life. - Tough but fair. 115 00:05:37,830 --> 00:05:38,633 Like now, Pam. 116 00:05:38,634 --> 00:05:40,527 Now would have been a great time to hold it in. 117 00:05:44,227 --> 00:05:47,143 I have... I have no idea 118 00:05:47,187 --> 00:05:49,189 what she said, but it just sounds funny. 119 00:05:50,688 --> 00:05:52,298 Jesus, Cyril, watch the landing. 120 00:05:52,342 --> 00:05:55,126 You gotta slide it in there gently. 121 00:05:56,781 --> 00:05:58,522 You are a terrible pilot. 122 00:05:58,566 --> 00:06:00,698 You put me on a job that's not my specialty. 123 00:06:00,742 --> 00:06:03,222 - That's bad captaining. - Co-captaining. 124 00:06:03,266 --> 00:06:05,398 - Oh, now you share the credit? - Fine. 125 00:06:05,442 --> 00:06:08,532 I should have assigned Cyril to his specialty of, uh... 126 00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:11,143 what is your specialty again? Space accounting? 127 00:06:11,187 --> 00:06:13,604 You're putting "space" in front of it to make it extra silly, 128 00:06:13,605 --> 00:06:16,671 but it's actually really an important part of running a ship. 129 00:06:20,805 --> 00:06:22,405 That was quick. 130 00:06:30,207 --> 00:06:33,602 He's asking... 131 00:06:36,866 --> 00:06:41,653 He was just asking where we got these human costumes, but... 132 00:06:41,697 --> 00:06:44,829 Oh, thank God you're here, Cyril. You're so quick on the draw. 133 00:06:44,830 --> 00:06:46,789 My blaster got stuck in its holster. 134 00:06:46,832 --> 00:06:48,486 - I can help with that. - Stop it! 135 00:06:48,530 --> 00:06:50,619 Unwanted advance in the workplace. 136 00:06:50,662 --> 00:06:53,447 Take it up with the Dri'n pirate HR. 137 00:06:53,491 --> 00:06:56,363 Get those uniforms on and put in your voice changers. 138 00:06:56,407 --> 00:06:59,278 - More pirates will be coming. - On my tits. Whaaat? 139 00:06:59,279 --> 00:07:02,500 - Do you even have tits? - They're retractable. 140 00:07:03,719 --> 00:07:06,678 Now, where is that mainframe? 141 00:07:06,722 --> 00:07:08,811 This ship has zero Feng Shui. 142 00:07:09,855 --> 00:07:11,857 Whoa. 143 00:07:11,901 --> 00:07:15,294 There's gotta be a switch to get a laser bridge or something. 144 00:07:15,295 --> 00:07:19,299 Why people build dangerous ravines in spaceships is beyond me. 145 00:07:23,463 --> 00:07:25,436 You gotta warn me next time! 146 00:07:25,479 --> 00:07:27,960 We almost... and that hook is not secure! 147 00:07:28,004 --> 00:07:30,310 How do you even know the mainframe is on this side? 148 00:07:30,354 --> 00:07:33,531 Oh, I don't. I just find terror kind of hot, you know? 149 00:07:33,575 --> 00:07:34,879 I do not know. 150 00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:36,621 Not to mention the woman swinging the man across 151 00:07:36,665 --> 00:07:40,902 is totally... emasculating! Shit balls! 152 00:07:42,279 --> 00:07:44,107 Guys, remember, place them 153 00:07:44,150 --> 00:07:46,762 on the structural beams for maximum impact. 154 00:07:46,805 --> 00:07:49,765 I need more. I'm missing a testicle. 155 00:07:49,958 --> 00:07:51,873 - What the hell are you doing? - What's the big deal? 156 00:07:51,917 --> 00:07:54,701 It's thermite; throw it anywhere, it's gonna blow up the ship. 157 00:07:54,702 --> 00:07:58,619 - I'm not letting you waste thermite. - Give me the thermite. 158 00:07:58,662 --> 00:08:00,926 - God damn it, Archer. - Uh-oh. 159 00:08:00,969 --> 00:08:03,972 It was an accident. Yeah, it was flirty horseplay. 160 00:08:04,016 --> 00:08:06,583 - These aren't toys. - Your boobs? 161 00:08:06,627 --> 00:08:09,021 - Because I beg to differ. - It's stuck. 162 00:08:09,064 --> 00:08:10,936 Krieger, how do you peel off these thermite charges? 163 00:08:10,979 --> 00:08:12,981 - Oh, no worries there. - Oh, good. 164 00:08:13,025 --> 00:08:15,810 It's a super polymer. Can't be removed or disarmed. 165 00:08:15,854 --> 00:08:19,031 I thought they would peel off like air fresheners. 166 00:08:19,074 --> 00:08:21,903 They look like air fresheners. Just take your shirt off, then. 167 00:08:21,947 --> 00:08:24,471 I'm not wearing a shirt or bra under this. 168 00:08:24,634 --> 00:08:28,246 - Oh, I noticed. - We all noticed. Is it for the pirates? 169 00:08:28,247 --> 00:08:30,771 Because they do not make good husbands, Lana. 170 00:08:30,814 --> 00:08:33,208 I am not trying to get a pirate husband! 171 00:08:33,252 --> 00:08:37,342 This ship has no AC and pirate garb isn't exactly... oh, shit. 172 00:08:37,343 --> 00:08:38,568 _ 173 00:08:38,674 --> 00:08:41,609 __ 174 00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:44,349 _ 175 00:08:44,350 --> 00:08:47,657 Hey! 176 00:08:49,790 --> 00:08:51,966 Huh, it actually worked. 177 00:08:52,010 --> 00:08:54,099 Almost like Krieger knows what he was doing. 178 00:08:54,142 --> 00:08:57,102 I'm sorry, Lana. He'll never be a space cowboy. 179 00:08:57,145 --> 00:09:00,018 - Now, let's blow up this ship... - Without blowing my tits off. 180 00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:02,020 Give me one more. I need to finish my testicle. 181 00:09:02,063 --> 00:09:04,587 - Here. - Seriously?! 182 00:09:04,631 --> 00:09:06,546 Guys, even for me this is getting childish. 183 00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:09,897 Don't mention children. Lana will smear her mascara. 184 00:09:09,941 --> 00:09:13,248 Eavesdropping and lobbing insults is not running comms. 185 00:09:13,292 --> 00:09:15,838 I knew I should have done the assigning, because 186 00:09:15,839 --> 00:09:18,644 everyone you picked is spectacularly wrong for the job. 187 00:09:18,645 --> 00:09:20,124 See, this is what I'm talking about. 188 00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:23,379 Why would they put the mainframe right next door to the mess? 189 00:09:23,414 --> 00:09:24,912 The heat would be hell on the data core. 190 00:09:24,956 --> 00:09:26,260 What, did you read that in your 191 00:09:26,261 --> 00:09:29,569 - spaceship architecture magazine? - You mean"Starchitectural Digest"? 192 00:09:29,612 --> 00:09:32,093 Yes. Shall we get to work? 193 00:09:33,921 --> 00:09:38,056 Um... do you know how to disable a radar system? 194 00:09:38,099 --> 00:09:40,622 - No. - Is this another "fear is hot" thing, 195 00:09:40,623 --> 00:09:43,060 or do you really not know? Because I sure don't. 196 00:09:43,061 --> 00:09:44,329 Ugh, bad captaining! 197 00:09:44,470 --> 00:09:47,857 Mission accomplished. 198 00:09:47,901 --> 00:09:49,859 How long should we set the timers for? 199 00:09:49,903 --> 00:09:51,586 All right, let's see. Uh, Cyril and Cheryl have 200 00:09:51,587 --> 00:09:53,445 to disarm the radar; we all have to get to the hatch; 201 00:09:53,446 --> 00:09:55,061 and I have to strip this pirate suit off 202 00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:57,431 - so the bomb won't blowmy tits off. - And Archer's baby-maker! 203 00:09:57,432 --> 00:10:00,653 Don't... don't say "baby," Pam, because you know... 204 00:10:00,696 --> 00:10:02,307 Shit! 205 00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:04,396 You set them off! How much time we got? 206 00:10:04,439 --> 00:10:06,039 - Shit, 11 minutes. - Jesus! 207 00:10:06,049 --> 00:10:08,048 Couldn't you have kicked a higher number? 208 00:10:08,083 --> 00:10:09,879 Or, you know, not at all? 209 00:10:09,923 --> 00:10:13,013 - We gotta run. - Yeah, not much of a runner. 210 00:10:13,056 --> 00:10:14,884 Okay, guys, listen up. We have 11 minutes 211 00:10:14,928 --> 00:10:16,669 to get our asses off this ship before it explodes. 212 00:10:16,712 --> 00:10:19,237 Oh, God. If you find terror hot, 213 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:21,282 I must be gorgeous to you right now. 214 00:10:21,326 --> 00:10:24,198 - Yeah. - No, stop! I shouldn't even be here! 215 00:10:24,199 --> 00:10:25,330 I should have been the one 216 00:10:25,373 --> 00:10:27,245 kicking back on the "Seamus" running comms! 217 00:10:27,428 --> 00:10:30,213 For your information, I've got my hands full. 218 00:10:30,257 --> 00:10:31,779 Full of what, gin and tonics? 219 00:10:31,780 --> 00:10:33,391 I don't know what you're talking about. 220 00:10:33,434 --> 00:10:34,782 We can hear the ice clinking. 221 00:10:34,783 --> 00:10:38,438 No, that's space static. Must be sun spots. 222 00:10:38,439 --> 00:10:40,615 We need you to connect us with Ray. 223 00:10:40,659 --> 00:10:44,531 - He's on a sick day! - We're going to blow up in 11 minutes. 224 00:10:44,532 --> 00:10:45,793 Closer to ten. 225 00:10:45,794 --> 00:10:50,146 Hold, please. Ray? 226 00:10:50,190 --> 00:10:51,756 Ray, thank God. We need your help. 227 00:10:51,897 --> 00:10:53,507 Yeah, kind of in the middle of something. 228 00:10:53,551 --> 00:10:58,032 Ray our surgery pod is not designed for recreational use. 229 00:10:58,033 --> 00:11:00,775 - This is a medical procedure. - Scented candles? 230 00:11:00,819 --> 00:11:03,996 Is it a crime to want to brighten up my colonoscopy? 231 00:11:04,039 --> 00:11:07,041 - I think not. - You said it wasn't recreational! 232 00:11:07,042 --> 00:11:09,175 Colorectal cancer's serious business. 233 00:11:09,218 --> 00:11:11,525 You should be checked every 10 years after 50. 234 00:11:11,569 --> 00:11:13,222 Ugh, how old are you? 235 00:11:13,266 --> 00:11:16,921 Or if you have atypical symptoms, like a change in bowel habits. 236 00:11:16,922 --> 00:11:18,576 Speaking of which, we're in the bowels 237 00:11:18,619 --> 00:11:20,665 - of an enemy battle cruiser! - I'll be wearing 238 00:11:20,708 --> 00:11:23,972 my colorectal blue ribbon that says, "I got tested." 239 00:11:24,166 --> 00:11:26,089 Tomorrow, after my sick day. 240 00:11:26,124 --> 00:11:27,346 Which you're interrupting. 241 00:11:27,381 --> 00:11:29,040 Ugh, we need you to walk us through disabling 242 00:11:29,084 --> 00:11:31,956 a giant spaceship radar system thingy. 243 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:35,007 But my crisis vest is on Deck 2! 244 00:11:36,178 --> 00:11:37,962 - Ray! - Fine. 245 00:11:38,006 --> 00:11:39,921 Let old Ray just interrupt his prescribed 246 00:11:39,964 --> 00:11:41,923 lifesaving medical test to call up 247 00:11:41,966 --> 00:11:45,361 alien battle cruiser schematics on his sick day. 248 00:11:45,404 --> 00:11:47,537 Don't suppose you have a ship model number? 249 00:11:47,580 --> 00:11:50,844 We're inside the ship, so no. And kind of in a hurry! 250 00:11:50,845 --> 00:11:52,323 Do you see a blinking green light? 251 00:11:55,042 --> 00:11:56,477 We're dead. 252 00:11:56,478 --> 00:11:58,741 Don't you just crave its sweet release? 253 00:11:58,785 --> 00:12:02,876 Okay, sending you the disarming protocols... 254 00:12:02,920 --> 00:12:04,878 - ...now. - Thanks, Ray, you're a lifesaver. 255 00:12:04,922 --> 00:12:08,534 You're... God damn it, Ray. Is this a picture of your colon? 256 00:12:08,577 --> 00:12:10,013 - Aww. - Sorry. 257 00:12:10,014 --> 00:12:12,538 This wine might be mixing with my propofol. 258 00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:14,181 I do see why this is addictive. 259 00:12:14,192 --> 00:12:15,322 We only have eight minutes! 260 00:12:15,323 --> 00:12:19,113 Don't get your panties in a bunch. 261 00:12:19,414 --> 00:12:21,764 Also, do you see any polyps? 262 00:12:21,808 --> 00:12:24,985 Lana, how is it possible you wanna give all this up for diapers? 263 00:12:25,029 --> 00:12:27,579 I don't know, maybe because I don't need to play two-bit 264 00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,816 space cowboy just because I'm scared of commitment. 265 00:12:29,860 --> 00:12:32,384 How dare you speak precisely the truth at me. 266 00:12:32,427 --> 00:12:35,821 - Hey, guys! Wait up! - You used to be fun. 267 00:12:35,822 --> 00:12:38,606 Now you want to do not-fun stuff like settling down. 268 00:12:38,737 --> 00:12:42,263 - Well, I got news for you, sister. - Don't say that, ever. 269 00:12:42,306 --> 00:12:45,527 - Settling is for potato chips. - Oh, God, Archer. 270 00:12:45,570 --> 00:12:49,922 Will you stop treating me like some baby-crazy cliché of maternal desire? 271 00:12:53,361 --> 00:12:56,886 - Aww, look at them! - Oh, come on, Lana. 272 00:12:56,929 --> 00:13:01,325 - Space ocelots. - Actually, they're called "grimalkians." 273 00:13:01,369 --> 00:13:06,026 Shut your mouth, Pam. That is a goddamn space ocelot. 274 00:13:07,157 --> 00:13:09,116 Ah, son of a bitch. 275 00:13:09,159 --> 00:13:11,292 - You're a real natural. - I've seen these before. 276 00:13:11,335 --> 00:13:13,468 A shithead ex of mine had one as a pet. 277 00:13:13,511 --> 00:13:15,948 - I think they're endangered. - No doubt the Dri'n 278 00:13:15,992 --> 00:13:17,689 stole them to sell their fur to illegal traders. 279 00:13:17,733 --> 00:13:21,215 Yeah, this ex was an illegal trader, so that all tracks. 280 00:13:21,258 --> 00:13:24,700 Shit, we've only got seven minutes to get off this death star... 281 00:13:24,701 --> 00:13:26,437 lowercase "D," lowercase "S"... 282 00:13:26,481 --> 00:13:30,093 and back to the "Seamus" before we explode in a million pieces. 283 00:13:30,257 --> 00:13:32,259 No, we can't blow up the ship with them onboard. 284 00:13:32,302 --> 00:13:35,609 - They'll go extinct. - I'll watch anything that asshole loved burn. 285 00:13:35,610 --> 00:13:38,352 Just look how adorable they are. 286 00:13:38,395 --> 00:13:40,223 Ow! 287 00:13:40,267 --> 00:13:43,226 Guys, look at this! They love me! 288 00:13:43,270 --> 00:13:44,923 It's like I'm their king! 289 00:13:48,512 --> 00:13:50,514 Uh, Cyril, Cheryl? Did you guys... 290 00:13:50,557 --> 00:13:53,430 Fail spectacularly at the one task you were given? 291 00:13:53,473 --> 00:13:55,606 You said turn off the radar. 292 00:13:55,649 --> 00:13:57,390 You didn't say anything about an alarm! 293 00:13:57,434 --> 00:13:59,610 It was clearly implied. 294 00:13:59,653 --> 00:14:01,219 Yes, it was. Wasn't it? 295 00:14:01,220 --> 00:14:03,222 Yes, it was. 296 00:14:08,667 --> 00:14:10,625 All clear. No intruders in here. 297 00:14:10,669 --> 00:14:13,758 - Oh, shit, is that English? - He's the intruder you're looking for! 298 00:14:13,759 --> 00:14:15,587 Aww, balls. Mine's broken too. 299 00:14:17,458 --> 00:14:21,419 - Hey, screw you for that. - Girl's gotta self-preserve, dude. 300 00:14:22,550 --> 00:14:25,423 Okay, so now we need to rescue Cyril and Cheryl... 301 00:14:25,466 --> 00:14:28,208 Yeah, that's great, but we have another rescue first. 302 00:14:28,251 --> 00:14:29,774 - What? - The space ocelots, Pam. 303 00:14:29,775 --> 00:14:33,430 We've got six minutes, so let's start with the... 304 00:14:33,431 --> 00:14:35,781 widdle baby furballs. 305 00:14:35,824 --> 00:14:38,784 - Oh, mother... - Is not what you should be, 306 00:14:38,827 --> 00:14:41,395 because these things do not like you. 307 00:14:41,439 --> 00:14:43,876 It is a hilarious twist of fate. 308 00:14:45,312 --> 00:14:47,793 Holy hell, those little twerps are quick. 309 00:14:47,956 --> 00:14:51,699 - Oh, well. Let's get out of here. - What the... 310 00:14:51,743 --> 00:14:56,399 - Aww, he likes you. - Um, no, Lana. He loves me. 311 00:14:56,443 --> 00:14:59,610 This guy is so cool. Here, Lana, get a picture. 312 00:14:59,620 --> 00:15:01,970 Just kick the little shit off and let's roll! 313 00:15:02,014 --> 00:15:03,449 We're buds! 314 00:15:03,450 --> 00:15:06,235 I'm a badass space cowboy, and he's my deputy! 315 00:15:06,279 --> 00:15:08,194 Don't you wanna jump on my shoulder 316 00:15:08,237 --> 00:15:12,024 and be my widdle deputy? I'm a co-space cowboy. 317 00:15:12,067 --> 00:15:15,462 Wow, jealousy is an ugly color on you, Lana. 318 00:15:16,594 --> 00:15:18,770 Something's wrong with this blaster! 319 00:15:19,814 --> 00:15:21,816 Have you tried opening your eyes? 320 00:15:21,860 --> 00:15:23,077 Yes! 321 00:15:23,078 --> 00:15:26,212 They actually are open! For real! 322 00:15:28,867 --> 00:15:31,565 Guess that's not a factor anyway. 323 00:15:33,045 --> 00:15:35,482 Where's the fire, brother? 324 00:15:35,676 --> 00:15:38,635 Oh, shit, was that English? 325 00:15:38,679 --> 00:15:40,724 Why'd you even open your big mouth, Archer? 326 00:15:40,768 --> 00:15:42,552 He was running right by us. 327 00:15:42,595 --> 00:15:46,802 I think the better question is, why do we even have a ship robot 328 00:15:46,803 --> 00:15:50,168 if he can't even make his stupid robot gadgets work? 329 00:15:50,212 --> 00:15:52,867 - We're cut off! - My circulation is cut off. 330 00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:54,651 The grip on this thing is unreal. 331 00:15:54,695 --> 00:15:57,654 Look at this! He's eating this shit up. 332 00:15:59,134 --> 00:16:03,965 Come on, little buddy. Let's go in the fun tunnel. 333 00:16:04,008 --> 00:16:05,618 - Pam? - Nah. 334 00:16:05,662 --> 00:16:07,795 I don't do tight spaces I'm not familiar with. 335 00:16:07,838 --> 00:16:10,710 Just go. I'll hold them off and meet you at the dock. 336 00:16:10,711 --> 00:16:13,626 Come and get it, space dicks! 337 00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:17,021 - Well, at least it's downhill. - A little too downhill. 338 00:16:17,065 --> 00:16:20,024 - Are you sure this is an air vent? - Of course it's an air vent. 339 00:16:26,378 --> 00:16:29,033 Ugh, you've gotta be shitting me. 340 00:16:31,079 --> 00:16:34,125 Oops, I guess it wasn't an air vent. 341 00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:41,349 - Ah, my blaster jammed! - Blasters don't jam, you lying fleshbag! 342 00:16:41,393 --> 00:16:43,090 You're pathetic! Cover me! 343 00:16:47,181 --> 00:16:48,922 - I thought you had a plan! - I do! 344 00:16:48,966 --> 00:16:51,969 - I'm making a necklace. - I will give you one of my teeth. 345 00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:54,145 - Just get me off this ship. - Nope, it's not the same. 346 00:16:54,188 --> 00:16:55,973 It has to be from a kill. 347 00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:58,192 Unless that's something you might be interested in. 348 00:16:58,236 --> 00:17:02,239 Ew, no. Hey, any chance of getting a rescue here? 349 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,329 - Yeah, uh, about that. - Oh, Lana. 350 00:17:04,372 --> 00:17:05,983 - Thank God. - Archer had us escape 351 00:17:06,026 --> 00:17:08,159 - in a stupid air vent that... - Air vent, copy that. 352 00:17:11,162 --> 00:17:14,295 - Cyril, let her finish. - Oh, God, this is a dead end. 353 00:17:14,339 --> 00:17:16,080 We have two minutes! What do we do? 354 00:17:16,123 --> 00:17:17,689 Ugh, you're not gonna wet your uniform 355 00:17:17,690 --> 00:17:19,953 like last time? Not the time or place. 356 00:17:20,137 --> 00:17:21,877 Actually, this is a pretty good time and place. 357 00:17:21,921 --> 00:17:24,706 New plan: we form a human-ocelot ladder... 358 00:17:24,750 --> 00:17:27,492 - Ugh, I'd rather just die. - To get back to the air vent. 359 00:17:27,535 --> 00:17:30,929 - Stop calling it an air vent. - Fine! 360 00:17:30,930 --> 00:17:32,322 Pam! 361 00:17:32,323 --> 00:17:35,195 - Thank God. - You're running the wrong way. 362 00:17:35,239 --> 00:17:36,369 Cannonball! 363 00:17:38,068 --> 00:17:39,546 It's in my mouth. 364 00:17:46,424 --> 00:17:48,339 This is not good. 365 00:17:50,993 --> 00:17:54,387 - Even my little ocelot bud bailed. - I'm calling Krieger for backup. 366 00:17:54,388 --> 00:17:57,739 No, Lana. Space cowboys do or die. 367 00:17:57,783 --> 00:17:59,175 He's our only option. 368 00:17:59,176 --> 00:18:02,341 Malory, Krieger, come in! 369 00:18:02,492 --> 00:18:04,137 Come in! 370 00:18:04,172 --> 00:18:05,506 Yes! It's Krieger. What do you need? I can do it! 371 00:18:05,549 --> 00:18:08,377 Get down here, stat. We need backup immediately. 372 00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:09,596 - Trash compactor. - I'm on it! 373 00:18:09,597 --> 00:18:13,209 Yes! Needed by real humans. 374 00:18:17,039 --> 00:18:18,954 My God, why did we even bring him? 375 00:18:18,997 --> 00:18:22,218 This is it, people! This is the end! 376 00:18:22,262 --> 00:18:25,352 Brace yourselves for obliteration! 377 00:18:28,180 --> 00:18:30,226 I really like her this way. 378 00:18:30,270 --> 00:18:33,273 - I'm kind of into it myself. - Wait! Look! 379 00:18:41,019 --> 00:18:44,371 Jesus! They're demons in disguise. 380 00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:46,503 I've been fooled. 381 00:18:49,506 --> 00:18:50,854 - Ugh. - Oh, my God. 382 00:18:50,855 --> 00:18:53,945 Why does it have to be so gross? 383 00:18:55,382 --> 00:18:58,385 Stand back, folks. I've "bot" this. 384 00:18:58,428 --> 00:19:04,478 And once again, you and your iron heart are completely useless. 385 00:19:06,044 --> 00:19:07,698 There's my pal! 386 00:19:07,872 --> 00:19:10,875 Back to normal. You can't quit me, can you? 387 00:19:10,918 --> 00:19:12,659 How much time? 388 00:19:12,703 --> 00:19:15,488 - 30 seconds. - This is gonna be tight. 389 00:19:15,532 --> 00:19:16,749 It wouldn't be tight if you hadn't screwed up 390 00:19:16,750 --> 00:19:19,351 - the assignments! - Whatever, Lana. 391 00:19:19,361 --> 00:19:21,059 Maybe I screwed up the assignments on purpose 392 00:19:21,102 --> 00:19:23,714 so you'd feel needed and want to stay. 393 00:19:23,757 --> 00:19:25,411 Oh, please. Maybe you're just saying that 394 00:19:25,455 --> 00:19:27,413 as a cool way to cover screwing up the assignments. 395 00:19:27,457 --> 00:19:30,547 Oh, go have an Earth baby, why don't you? 396 00:19:30,590 --> 00:19:32,505 Oh, we can't just leave these space ocelots here. 397 00:19:32,689 --> 00:19:34,289 Grimalkians. And, yes, we can. 398 00:19:34,299 --> 00:19:36,040 Pam, I'm not gonna do this with you. 399 00:19:36,083 --> 00:19:39,565 - I'm already too upset. - Oh, God, their eyes. 400 00:19:39,609 --> 00:19:41,349 - Even though they hate you? - Yep, even though. 401 00:19:41,393 --> 00:19:43,743 - 15 seconds! - I think these furry banshees 402 00:19:43,787 --> 00:19:45,352 are just gonna have to stay on board. 403 00:20:00,542 --> 00:20:05,372 - I meant on board the other ship. - Oh, God damn it to shit! 404 00:20:05,373 --> 00:20:07,071 Can't these bastards stay in the cargo hold? 405 00:20:07,114 --> 00:20:10,727 Mommy's just joking. 406 00:20:10,770 --> 00:20:13,338 I think we all know who the fun parent is. 407 00:20:16,192 --> 00:20:20,271 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 408 00:20:21,305 --> 00:21:21,666 Watch Movies, TV Series and Live Sports Signup Here -> WWW.ADMITME.APP