1
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>> CHERLENE: ¶ Got too much time
2
00:00:06,524 --> 00:00:08,591
And nowhere to go ¶
3
00:00:12,229 --> 00:00:13,930
¶ But I drink enough
4
00:00:13,932 --> 00:00:16,332
to say hello ¶
5
00:00:19,303 --> 00:00:23,172
¶ I'm not in love with anyone
6
00:00:26,476 --> 00:00:28,044
¶ But I'm high enough
7
00:00:28,046 --> 00:00:29,211
Not to give a... ¶
8
00:00:29,213 --> 00:00:31,580
>> LANA: Goddamn it!
9
00:00:31,582 --> 00:00:32,581
>> CHERLENE: Cut!
10
00:00:32,583 --> 00:00:33,582
Okay, whoa!
11
00:00:33,584 --> 00:00:34,583
Cut it, fellas!
12
00:00:34,585 --> 00:00:35,584
(music stops)
13
00:00:35,586 --> 00:00:36,452
>> ARCHER: Man, I am blowing
14
00:00:36,454 --> 00:00:37,219
this jug.
15
00:00:37,221 --> 00:00:38,120
>> CHERLENE: What the hell is
16
00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:38,955
wrong with you?
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00:00:38,957 --> 00:00:40,056
>> LANA: You are what's wrong
18
00:00:40,058 --> 00:00:41,557
It's 5:50 in the goddamn
19
00:00:41,559 --> 00:00:42,391
morning!
20
00:00:42,393 --> 00:00:43,392
>> CHERLENE: Uh, duh, it's
21
00:00:43,394 --> 00:00:44,393
called the golden hour.
22
00:00:44,395 --> 00:00:45,428
>> LANA: The...
23
00:00:45,430 --> 00:00:46,262
>> PAM: The light takes on a
24
00:00:46,264 --> 00:00:47,763
>> LANA: I know what it means,
25
00:00:47,765 --> 00:00:49,432
>> CHERLENE: Then you know it's
26
00:00:49,434 --> 00:00:50,433
the best time to record stuff,
27
00:00:50,435 --> 00:00:51,133
so...
28
00:00:51,135 --> 00:00:52,001
>> LANA: Film!
29
00:00:52,003 --> 00:00:52,969
It's the best time to record
30
00:00:52,971 --> 00:00:53,636
things on film!
31
00:00:53,638 --> 00:00:55,104
It cannot possibly have any
32
00:00:55,106 --> 00:00:56,272
effect on recording audio.
33
00:00:56,274 --> 00:00:57,440
>> KRIEGER: Oh, was I supposed
34
00:00:57,442 --> 00:00:58,474
to be recording that?
35
00:00:58,476 --> 00:00:59,308
>> CHERLENE: Krieger!
36
00:00:59,310 --> 00:01:00,176
>> PAM: Goddamn it.
37
00:01:00,178 --> 00:01:00,943
(Cherlene growls)
38
00:01:00,945 --> 00:01:01,677
>> CHERLENE: We're losing the
39
00:01:01,679 --> 00:01:03,412
>> ARCHER: We're not losing me
40
00:01:03,414 --> 00:01:04,280
blowing this jug.
41
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>> MALORY: Are you bothering
42
00:01:05,149 --> 00:01:05,748
them?
43
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>> LANA: I am, and also,
44
00:01:06,951 --> 00:01:08,084
happy Opposite Day.
45
00:01:08,086 --> 00:01:09,151
>> MALORY: Is she bothering you?
46
00:01:09,153 --> 00:01:10,086
>> OTHERS: Yes!
47
00:01:10,088 --> 00:01:11,120
>> MALORY: Stop bothering them.
48
00:01:11,122 --> 00:01:12,088
>> LANA: They're the ones...
49
00:01:12,090 --> 00:01:12,955
>> MALORY: They are trying to
50
00:01:12,957 --> 00:01:14,090
make a record, Lana, and there
51
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is a finite amount of golden
52
00:01:15,259 --> 00:01:16,459
hour.
53
00:01:16,461 --> 00:01:17,326
>> LANA: Which, again...
54
00:01:17,328 --> 00:01:18,260
>> MALORY: I know, but if
55
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Cherlene's happy...
56
00:01:19,430 --> 00:01:20,496
>> CHERLENE: Outlaw country,
57
00:01:20,498 --> 00:01:21,497
woooooo!
58
00:01:21,499 --> 00:01:22,798
(music playing)
59
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>> MALORY: "Woo," exactly.
60
00:01:24,335 --> 00:01:25,634
Then I am happy.
61
00:01:25,636 --> 00:01:27,003
Or at least I will be, once we
62
00:01:27,005 --> 00:01:28,304
start selling some records.
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00:01:28,306 --> 00:01:29,305
>> LANA: I'll be happy when I
64
00:01:29,307 --> 00:01:30,206
can sleep without getting up to
65
00:01:30,208 --> 00:01:31,474
pee every six minutes.
66
00:01:31,476 --> 00:01:32,341
>> MALORY: Pfft, you think
67
00:01:32,343 --> 00:01:33,542
you're not sleeping now?
68
00:01:33,544 --> 00:01:34,977
Wait till that thing's born.
69
00:01:34,979 --> 00:01:36,645
>> MALORY: So do yourself and
70
00:01:36,647 --> 00:01:37,646
those bosoms of yours a favor,
71
00:01:37,648 --> 00:01:39,215
and get a wet nurse.
72
00:01:39,217 --> 00:01:40,549
>> LANA: That cannot still be
73
00:01:40,551 --> 00:01:41,717
a thing.
74
00:01:41,719 --> 00:01:42,685
>> MALORY: Preferably one who
75
00:01:42,687 --> 00:01:43,619
cooks.
76
00:01:43,621 --> 00:01:45,488
We had a Dominican, just lovely,
77
00:01:45,490 --> 00:01:47,456
bosoms like... well, like yours,
78
00:01:47,458 --> 00:01:49,125
but umpteen babies later.
79
00:01:49,127 --> 00:01:51,961
My God, Sterling loved her.
80
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She was with us nearly four
81
00:01:52,964 --> 00:01:54,463
years.
82
00:01:54,465 --> 00:01:56,298
Now what was her name?
83
00:01:56,300 --> 00:01:59,035
I want to say Mariela?
84
00:01:59,037 --> 00:02:00,503
Maricela?
85
00:02:00,505 --> 00:02:01,670
Wait, or Ruby?
86
00:02:01,672 --> 00:02:02,505
>> LANA: I don't...
87
00:02:02,507 --> 00:02:03,372
>> MALORY: The point is, they
88
00:02:03,374 --> 00:02:04,340
steal from you; it's just the
89
00:02:04,342 --> 00:02:06,075
cost of doing business.
90
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(Lana sighs)
91
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>> LANA: Steal what?
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00:02:08,179 --> 00:02:09,178
We haven't been paid in months,
93
00:02:09,180 --> 00:02:11,047
Malory; I'm pretty much broke.
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>> MALORY: Join the club.
95
00:02:12,383 --> 00:02:13,682
Because believe me, if I had
96
00:02:13,684 --> 00:02:15,184
the money, I would get the hell
97
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out of this... Hillbilly Hilton.
98
00:02:17,555 --> 00:02:18,554
>> KRIEGER: Am I supposed to be
99
00:02:18,556 --> 00:02:19,588
recording this?
100
00:02:19,590 --> 00:02:20,556
>> PAM: Krieger!
101
00:02:20,558 --> 00:02:21,557
>> KRIEGER: Watch it!
102
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>> CHERLENE: Goddamn it!
103
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>> ARCHER: Whoa!
104
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(jug shattering)
105
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Jug down!
106
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Jug down!
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>> MALORY: As difficult as that
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would be.
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00:02:28,733 --> 00:02:29,732
(Archer sobs)
110
00:02:29,734 --> 00:02:30,733
>> ARCHER: I'm 'a plant
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00:02:30,735 --> 00:02:33,436
a red fern for ya, jug.
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00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:41,074
Watch Movies, TV Series and Live Sports
Signup Here -> WWW.ADMITME.APP
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>> MALORY: Item one:
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Woodhouse, scrape.
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00:03:15,913 --> 00:03:17,413
>> WOODHOUSE: Yes, mum.
116
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(all groaning)
117
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>> MALORY: And gripe all you
118
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want, but no one is eating Eggs
119
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Woodhouse until you people start
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bringing in some money!
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>> ARCHER: But they were already
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cooked; what good does it do
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to throw them away?
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>> MALORY: None.
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That's the whole point.
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And no cocaine donuts for you!
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>> PAM (muffled): Aw, come on!
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00:03:32,830 --> 00:03:34,130
I got to load up my body before
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00:03:34,132 --> 00:03:35,464
Krieger sells it all!
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00:03:35,466 --> 00:03:36,298
>> ARCHER: Before what?
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>> CHERLENE: What?
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>> PAM: Krieger's selling the
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cocaine online.
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>> MALORY: Are you insane?
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>> KRIEGER: Yeah, if it's insane
136
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to use an X-gen asymmetric onion
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router and digital
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cryptocurrency to sell your
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cocaine anonymously and
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completely risk-free.
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Ah...
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Or a lot of the other shit I do.
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>> MALORY: But... so do people
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e-mail you, or...?
145
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>> KRIEGER: No.
146
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It's like shopping online, only
147
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for cocaine.
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I've already sold, uh...
149
00:03:59,957 --> 00:04:02,625
Wow, almost 800 grand worth.
150
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>> MALORY: Really?
151
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But how do we get paid?
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>> KRIEGER: With a totally
153
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untraceable digital currency
154
00:04:06,764 --> 00:04:07,830
that we can exchange for real
155
00:04:07,832 --> 00:04:10,599
U.S. dollars whenever we want.
156
00:04:10,601 --> 00:04:12,668
I call 'em Kriegerrands.
157
00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:13,669
>> MALORY: And then how do they
158
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get the cocaine?
159
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>> KRIEGER: We pack it up and
160
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ship it, easy peasy.
161
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At least in theory!
162
00:04:18,709 --> 00:04:21,877
(speaking Japanese)
163
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>> MALORY: Oh, for...
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I'll send up some help.
165
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And, missy, you had better watch
166
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it.
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(noisy chewing)
168
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>> ARCHER (mouth full): Jesus,
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these taste like calluses.
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>> PAM: Ew.
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>> CYRIL: Gross.
172
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>> RAY: That's so accurate.
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>> ARCHER: Lana.
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Lana.
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La...
176
00:04:47,871 --> 00:04:48,971
>> CHERLENE: What's up her
177
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gigantic giant ass?
178
00:04:50,875 --> 00:04:51,707
>> RAY: Wh...
179
00:04:51,709 --> 00:04:53,042
Probably you shitheads!
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00:04:53,044 --> 00:04:53,876
>> OTHERS: What did we do?
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>> RAY: Besides keeping
182
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everybody up all night with your
183
00:04:55,746 --> 00:04:56,979
damn hootenannies...
184
00:04:56,981 --> 00:04:57,880
>> ARCHER: Wait, that was a
185
00:04:57,882 --> 00:04:59,215
hootenanny?
186
00:04:59,217 --> 00:05:00,249
>> RAY: ...has anybody even
187
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thought about throwing her a
188
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goddamn baby shower?!
189
00:05:03,020 --> 00:05:03,752
>> CHERLENE: Ew!
190
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>> PAM: Um...
191
00:05:04,422 --> 00:05:05,254
>> CYRIL: Pfft, you mean a
192
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bastard sh... Ow!
193
00:05:05,923 --> 00:05:06,822
>> ARCHER: Cyril, shut your
194
00:05:06,824 --> 00:05:08,257
pout-hole, accept the fact that
195
00:05:08,259 --> 00:05:09,525
Lana was so far out of your
196
00:05:09,527 --> 00:05:10,926
league that impregnating her
197
00:05:10,928 --> 00:05:12,361
would've basically been
198
00:05:12,363 --> 00:05:13,696
interspecies breeding, and get
199
00:05:13,698 --> 00:05:15,864
on with your life!
200
00:05:15,866 --> 00:05:17,700
And then go get a cake.
201
00:05:17,702 --> 00:05:18,701
Okay, Ray...
202
00:05:18,703 --> 00:05:19,735
>> MALORY: Ray, Cyril, go help
203
00:05:19,737 --> 00:05:21,403
Krieger pack the cocaine.
204
00:05:21,405 --> 00:05:22,838
Cherlene, go pick or grin or
205
00:05:22,840 --> 00:05:23,739
something, and the rest of
206
00:05:23,741 --> 00:05:24,573
you...
207
00:05:24,575 --> 00:05:25,574
>> ARCHER: We're throwing Lana
208
00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:26,508
a baby shower.
209
00:05:26,510 --> 00:05:27,409
>> MALORY: Wh...?
210
00:05:27,411 --> 00:05:28,777
We haven't done that yet?
211
00:05:28,779 --> 00:05:30,579
I said move, people!
212
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Go, go, go, go, go!
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00:05:31,916 --> 00:05:33,415
(Ray bleats)
214
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Idiots.
215
00:05:34,585 --> 00:05:35,751
All right, I need them here
216
00:05:35,753 --> 00:05:36,785
making music and packaging
217
00:05:36,787 --> 00:05:38,787
cocaine, so this baby shower is
218
00:05:38,789 --> 00:05:39,955
up to you.
219
00:05:39,957 --> 00:05:41,457
Don't cock it up like you did
220
00:05:41,459 --> 00:05:42,858
Texas!
221
00:05:42,860 --> 00:05:43,726
>> PAM: Hey!
222
00:05:43,728 --> 00:05:44,627
>> MALORY: Oh, blow it out
223
00:05:44,629 --> 00:05:45,628
your ass!
224
00:05:45,630 --> 00:05:46,629
(Pam farts)
225
00:05:46,631 --> 00:05:47,630
(Archer laughs)
226
00:05:47,632 --> 00:05:48,631
>> ARCHER: I was hoping you'd
227
00:05:48,633 --> 00:05:49,632
do that.
228
00:05:49,634 --> 00:05:50,633
Okay, we should make a list.
229
00:05:50,635 --> 00:05:52,568
Item one: some paper to write
230
00:05:52,570 --> 00:05:53,902
said list on.
231
00:05:53,904 --> 00:05:54,803
(gasps)
232
00:05:54,805 --> 00:05:56,372
Item two... Woodhouse!
233
00:05:56,374 --> 00:05:57,439
Get in here!
234
00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:58,440
>> WOODHOUSE: Sir?
235
00:05:58,442 --> 00:05:59,541
>> ARCHER: Here, here's...
236
00:05:59,543 --> 00:06:00,809
400 bucks; go get all the stuff
237
00:06:00,811 --> 00:06:02,311
for a baby shower: cake,
238
00:06:02,313 --> 00:06:03,712
decorations, some of those water
239
00:06:03,714 --> 00:06:05,481
guns shaped like dicks...
240
00:06:05,483 --> 00:06:06,548
>> PAM: I think that's
241
00:06:06,550 --> 00:06:07,549
bachelorette parties.
242
00:06:07,551 --> 00:06:08,617
>> ARCHER: Really?
243
00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:10,619
Wow, okay, that explains...
244
00:06:10,621 --> 00:06:11,787
Uh, never mind.
245
00:06:11,789 --> 00:06:12,955
And, Woodhouse,
246
00:06:12,957 --> 00:06:14,323
if you spend any of this on
247
00:06:14,325 --> 00:06:15,891
heroin, you better buy enough to
248
00:06:15,893 --> 00:06:16,992
O.D. on, bec...
249
00:06:16,994 --> 00:06:17,993
>> WOODHOUSE: Will do!
250
00:06:17,995 --> 00:06:19,428
>> ARCHER: Will don't!
251
00:06:19,430 --> 00:06:20,496
>> PAM: Wait, so if Woodhouse is
252
00:06:20,498 --> 00:06:21,563
getting everything we need for
253
00:06:21,565 --> 00:06:22,498
the party, then...
254
00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:23,666
>> ARCHER: Oh, not everything,
255
00:06:23,668 --> 00:06:24,600
Pam.
256
00:06:24,602 --> 00:06:26,101
Because... you and I are going
257
00:06:26,103 --> 00:06:28,671
to get Kenny Loggins to play
258
00:06:28,673 --> 00:06:30,105
Lana's baby shower.
259
00:06:30,107 --> 00:06:31,774
>> PAM: Goddamn it.
260
00:06:31,776 --> 00:06:33,742
>> ARCHER: Pam.
261
00:06:33,744 --> 00:06:34,677
Pam.
262
00:06:34,679 --> 00:06:36,011
(inhales)
263
00:06:36,013 --> 00:06:37,980
>> PAM: What?!
264
00:06:37,982 --> 00:06:39,815
>> ARCHER: ¶ Danger zone.
265
00:06:39,817 --> 00:06:40,983
Wait, wait, wait, no.
266
00:06:40,985 --> 00:06:42,685
¶ This is it.
267
00:06:42,687 --> 00:06:43,652
>> KRIEGER: Yeah, you guys box
268
00:06:43,654 --> 00:06:44,820
it up, I slap on a mailing label
269
00:06:44,822 --> 00:06:46,088
from the printer, bing bang
270
00:06:46,090 --> 00:06:47,823
boom, it's good to go zoom.
271
00:06:47,825 --> 00:06:48,991
>> CYRIL: So, why are we in
272
00:06:48,993 --> 00:06:50,025
our underwear?
273
00:06:50,027 --> 00:06:51,093
>> KRIEGER: Eh, don't worry
274
00:06:51,095 --> 00:06:52,127
about it.
275
00:06:52,129 --> 00:06:53,128
>> PAM: Because it kind of seems
276
00:06:53,130 --> 00:06:54,630
like this is about you and not
277
00:06:54,632 --> 00:06:55,698
really about Lana.
278
00:06:55,700 --> 00:06:57,032
>> ARCHER: Okay, A, Lana loves
279
00:06:57,034 --> 00:06:58,100
Kenny Loggins.
280
00:06:58,102 --> 00:06:59,101
>> PAM: Really?
281
00:06:59,103 --> 00:07:00,102
>> ARCHER: I don't know.
282
00:07:00,104 --> 00:07:01,637
I mean, I assume she does.
283
00:07:01,639 --> 00:07:02,705
I do.
284
00:07:02,707 --> 00:07:03,806
>> GUARD: Whoa, whoa, where you
285
00:07:03,808 --> 00:07:04,807
think you're going?
286
00:07:04,809 --> 00:07:05,874
>> ARCHER: Uh, well, to give Mr.
287
00:07:05,876 --> 00:07:07,476
Loggins his wardrobe.
288
00:07:07,478 --> 00:07:08,777
>> GUARD: Not without a pass
289
00:07:08,779 --> 00:07:09,812
you're not.
290
00:07:09,814 --> 00:07:10,979
>> ARCHER: Yeah, we...
291
00:07:10,981 --> 00:07:12,114
>> PAM: Hey, I appreciate you're
292
00:07:12,116 --> 00:07:13,282
just doing your job, but if
293
00:07:13,284 --> 00:07:14,650
Kenny doesn't get this
294
00:07:14,652 --> 00:07:15,684
embroidered hippie shirt and
295
00:07:15,686 --> 00:07:16,685
these gigantic bell-bottoms, I
296
00:07:16,687 --> 00:07:17,686
highly doubt you'll have a job
297
00:07:17,688 --> 00:07:18,687
tomorrow.
298
00:07:18,689 --> 00:07:19,688
>> GUARD: Look, he ain't even
299
00:07:19,690 --> 00:07:20,689
here.
300
00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:21,690
He's probably still at the
301
00:07:21,692 --> 00:07:22,691
Tuntmore.
302
00:07:22,693 --> 00:07:23,692
>> PAM: Now, was that so hard...
303
00:07:23,694 --> 00:07:24,693
neck nuts?
304
00:07:24,695 --> 00:07:25,794
>> ARCHER: Good instincts back
305
00:07:25,796 --> 00:07:26,795
there, Pam.
306
00:07:26,797 --> 00:07:28,063
That's what we field agents
307
00:07:28,065 --> 00:07:29,798
call... Hmm.
308
00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:30,833
Guess I'm not a field agent
309
00:07:30,835 --> 00:07:32,067
anymore though.
310
00:07:32,069 --> 00:07:33,569
(Pam laughs)
311
00:07:33,571 --> 00:07:35,070
>> PAM: Man, you got to miss it.
312
00:07:35,072 --> 00:07:36,739
What a rush!
313
00:07:36,741 --> 00:07:37,906
>> ARCHER: Yeah, I miss it, but
314
00:07:37,908 --> 00:07:39,074
calm down.
315
00:07:39,076 --> 00:07:40,175
Jesus, it's not like you killed
316
00:07:40,177 --> 00:07:41,577
a guy.
317
00:07:41,579 --> 00:07:42,678
Taxi!
318
00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:43,679
(car door closes)
319
00:07:43,681 --> 00:07:44,913
Okay, so phase two may call for
320
00:07:44,915 --> 00:07:46,048
some field craft.
321
00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:47,649
A, there's no way a superstar
322
00:07:47,651 --> 00:07:48,851
like Kenny Loggins is gonna be
323
00:07:48,853 --> 00:07:50,152
registered under his own name.
324
00:07:50,154 --> 00:07:51,153
>> PAM (laughs): Yeah.
325
00:07:51,155 --> 00:07:52,521
It's not like he's Messina.
326
00:07:52,523 --> 00:07:53,522
>> ARCHER: Don't do that.
327
00:07:53,524 --> 00:07:54,523
Don't ever do that!
328
00:07:54,525 --> 00:07:55,891
>> PAM: Sorry! Geez!
329
00:07:55,893 --> 00:07:56,825
>> ARCHER: You should be.
330
00:07:56,827 --> 00:07:57,926
Jim Messina is a genius, and
331
00:07:57,928 --> 00:08:00,162
without him, no Poco.
332
00:08:00,164 --> 00:08:01,663
Where was I?
333
00:08:01,665 --> 00:08:02,731
Oh, yeah, we'll probably need to
334
00:08:02,733 --> 00:08:03,732
access the computer terminal at
335
00:08:03,734 --> 00:08:04,767
reception, so just follow my
336
00:08:04,769 --> 00:08:05,768
lead.
337
00:08:05,770 --> 00:08:06,769
>> PAM: Could I just follow
338
00:08:06,771 --> 00:08:07,770
Kenny Loggins?
339
00:08:07,772 --> 00:08:08,771
>> ARCHER: Wha...?
340
00:08:08,773 --> 00:08:09,772
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Well, maybe
341
00:08:09,774 --> 00:08:10,773
because it's in the rider,
342
00:08:10,775 --> 00:08:11,774
which I'll be happy to come down
343
00:08:11,776 --> 00:08:12,775
there and shove up his ass.
344
00:08:12,777 --> 00:08:13,776
>> ARCHER: Uh, excuse me, Mr.
345
00:08:13,778 --> 00:08:14,777
Loggins?
346
00:08:14,779 --> 00:08:15,778
Hi, I'm, uh...
347
00:08:15,780 --> 00:08:16,779
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Uh-huh,
348
00:08:16,781 --> 00:08:17,780
uh-huh, uh-huh.
349
00:08:17,782 --> 00:08:18,781
>> ARCHER: What the shit,
350
00:08:18,783 --> 00:08:19,782
Loggins?!
351
00:08:19,784 --> 00:08:20,783
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Ricky, bad
352
00:08:20,785 --> 00:08:21,784
touch!
353
00:08:21,786 --> 00:08:22,851
>> RICKY: Hands off Mr. Loggins!
354
00:08:22,853 --> 00:08:23,852
>> ARCHER: Hands off me, Lurch.
355
00:08:23,854 --> 00:08:24,853
Look at my suit.
356
00:08:24,855 --> 00:08:25,854
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Zap, Ricky,
357
00:08:25,856 --> 00:08:26,855
zap!
358
00:08:26,857 --> 00:08:27,856
>> ARCHER: Hey... Aah!
359
00:08:27,858 --> 00:08:28,857
(Pam screams)
360
00:08:28,859 --> 00:08:30,225
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Uh, hang on.
361
00:08:30,227 --> 00:08:31,560
Hit him again.
362
00:08:31,562 --> 00:08:32,694
>> PAM: Wait! No, no, no, no!
363
00:08:32,696 --> 00:08:33,729
>> ARCHER: What?! I...
364
00:08:33,731 --> 00:08:35,063
(grunting gibberish)
365
00:08:35,065 --> 00:08:36,198
>> KENNY LOGGINS: What's that?
366
00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:37,633
No, no, never mind.
367
00:08:37,635 --> 00:08:38,801
It's just a fan.
368
00:08:38,803 --> 00:08:39,935
(Archer groans)
369
00:08:39,937 --> 00:08:41,136
>> PAM: Holy shit zaps!
370
00:08:41,138 --> 00:08:42,137
Are you okay?
371
00:08:42,139 --> 00:08:43,205
(Archer coughs)
372
00:08:43,207 --> 00:08:44,573
>> ARCHER: Yeah, and I don't
373
00:08:44,575 --> 00:08:45,908
know about you, but I'm gonna be
374
00:08:45,910 --> 00:08:47,142
pretty upset if I end up having
375
00:08:47,144 --> 00:08:50,579
to murder Kenny Loggins.
376
00:08:50,581 --> 00:08:52,648
>> PAM: Meh.
377
00:08:55,819 --> 00:08:56,819
>> ARCHER: Yeah, that's fair!
378
00:08:56,821 --> 00:08:57,820
Kick out the guy whose custom
379
00:08:57,822 --> 00:09:00,055
Super 220 wool suit was ruined
380
00:09:00,057 --> 00:09:01,457
by Kenny Loggins!
381
00:09:01,459 --> 00:09:02,458
And where were you during all
382
00:09:02,460 --> 00:09:03,459
that?
383
00:09:03,461 --> 00:09:04,626
>> PAM: Oh, man, I was like,
384
00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,462
"What?!"
385
00:09:06,464 --> 00:09:08,430
So, what's up? What's the plan?
386
00:09:08,432 --> 00:09:09,431
>> ARCHER: (sighs) The plan is
387
00:09:09,433 --> 00:09:11,600
shut up and come on.
388
00:09:11,602 --> 00:09:13,068
>> GILLETTE: No, we have to play
389
00:09:13,070 --> 00:09:14,603
games at the baby shower.
390
00:09:14,605 --> 00:09:16,071
There's Don't Drop the Baby, uh,
391
00:09:16,073 --> 00:09:17,940
Dirty Diaper Game...
392
00:09:17,942 --> 00:09:19,575
>> CYRIL: What in God's name is
393
00:09:19,577 --> 00:09:20,676
the Dirty Diaper Game?
394
00:09:20,678 --> 00:09:21,677
>> GILLETTE: Oh, my God, it's
395
00:09:21,679 --> 00:09:22,678
hilarious.
396
00:09:22,680 --> 00:09:23,679
You get a bunch of newborn
397
00:09:23,681 --> 00:09:24,746
diapers, then you microwave
398
00:09:24,748 --> 00:09:25,848
different candy bars...
399
00:09:25,850 --> 00:09:27,516
>> CYRIL: Stop! Yeah, let me
400
00:09:27,518 --> 00:09:28,951
just stop you there, because if
401
00:09:28,953 --> 00:09:30,085
you finish that sentence, I'm
402
00:09:30,087 --> 00:09:31,587
going to rub cocaine in your
403
00:09:31,589 --> 00:09:32,688
eyes until you are blind.
404
00:09:32,690 --> 00:09:34,590
>> GILLETTE: Goddamn, Shawshank.
405
00:09:34,592 --> 00:09:35,824
>> LANA: Uh, Malory?
406
00:09:35,826 --> 00:09:36,825
(Malory screams)
407
00:09:36,827 --> 00:09:37,826
>> LANA: What?!
408
00:09:37,828 --> 00:09:39,094
>> MALORY: What... do you want?
409
00:09:39,096 --> 00:09:40,095
Jesus.
410
00:09:40,097 --> 00:09:41,096
>> LANA: I, um...
411
00:09:41,098 --> 00:09:42,764
Okay, so, as you know, or should
412
00:09:42,766 --> 00:09:44,500
know, I'm pregnant and...
413
00:09:44,502 --> 00:09:45,501
>> MALORY: (sighs) Lana, it's
414
00:09:45,503 --> 00:09:46,502
too late to...
415
00:09:46,504 --> 00:09:47,503
>> LANA: Okay, let me stop you.
416
00:09:47,505 --> 00:09:48,504
Having the baby-- don't know why
417
00:09:48,506 --> 00:09:49,505
that's such a mindbender for
418
00:09:49,507 --> 00:09:50,506
everybody, but...
419
00:09:50,508 --> 00:09:51,507
>> MALORY (chuckling): Well...
420
00:09:51,509 --> 00:09:52,674
>> LANA: But... Hush. I have a
421
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:53,809
lot of pretty major expenses
422
00:09:53,811 --> 00:09:54,977
coming up, and since we haven't
423
00:09:54,979 --> 00:09:57,479
been paid...
424
00:09:57,481 --> 00:09:58,480
(sighs) Look, I hate to ask, but
425
00:09:58,482 --> 00:09:59,481
I need...
426
00:09:59,483 --> 00:10:00,482
>> MALORY: WIC!
427
00:10:00,484 --> 00:10:01,383
>> LANA: What?
428
00:10:01,385 --> 00:10:02,384
>> MALORY: It's like welfare but
429
00:10:02,386 --> 00:10:03,385
for babies.
430
00:10:03,387 --> 00:10:04,386
I don't know-- I'm not a
431
00:10:04,388 --> 00:10:05,387
Democrat.
432
00:10:05,389 --> 00:10:06,388
But I think they give you a
433
00:10:06,390 --> 00:10:07,823
birth cheese.
434
00:10:07,825 --> 00:10:08,991
(lock clicks)
435
00:10:08,993 --> 00:10:10,125
>> LANA: A birth cheese.
436
00:10:10,127 --> 00:10:11,126
>> MALORY: Oh, for...
437
00:10:11,128 --> 00:10:12,694
Nothing's ever good enough.
438
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:13,795
>> WOODHOUSE: Sorry.
439
00:10:13,797 --> 00:10:15,797
I only had $200.
440
00:10:15,799 --> 00:10:16,798
>> MALORY: Not you.
441
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,801
Really? $200?
442
00:10:19,803 --> 00:10:20,802
>> ARCHER: Okay, there's $200
443
00:10:20,804 --> 00:10:22,704
for the uniforms, $100 for the
444
00:10:22,706 --> 00:10:25,173
sweet wigs and another $300 for
445
00:10:25,175 --> 00:10:27,709
Kenny Loggins' room number.
446
00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:29,044
>> HOUSEKEEPER: Mm-hmm.
447
00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:31,079
>> PAM: So, I'm curious-- why
448
00:10:31,081 --> 00:10:32,080
didn't you just call Cherlene,
449
00:10:32,082 --> 00:10:33,849
who owns the hotel?
450
00:10:33,851 --> 00:10:34,850
>> ARCHER: (sighs) And I'm
451
00:10:34,852 --> 00:10:35,918
curious-- why didn't you remind
452
00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:37,085
me about that until just now?
453
00:10:37,087 --> 00:10:38,086
>> PAM: You said shut up,
454
00:10:38,088 --> 00:10:39,087
J. Alfred Gotrocks.
455
00:10:39,089 --> 00:10:40,088
>> ARCHER: What?
456
00:10:40,090 --> 00:10:41,089
>> PAM: We haven't been paid in
457
00:10:41,091 --> 00:10:42,024
forever.
458
00:10:42,026 --> 00:10:43,025
Where are you getting all this
459
00:10:43,027 --> 00:10:44,026
money?
460
00:10:44,028 --> 00:10:45,527
>> ARCHER: I, uh...
461
00:10:45,529 --> 00:10:47,162
sold some artwork?
462
00:10:47,164 --> 00:10:48,697
>> CHERLENE: Goddamn it!
463
00:10:48,699 --> 00:10:49,731
What did I tell you about
464
00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:51,900
staying up on the wall, ghosts?!
465
00:10:51,902 --> 00:10:53,068
>> ARCHER: Okay, since I am or
466
00:10:53,070 --> 00:10:56,171
was a world-class secret agent,
467
00:10:56,173 --> 00:10:57,539
when we get up to his room, do
468
00:10:57,541 --> 00:10:59,207
actually follow my lead or...
469
00:10:59,209 --> 00:11:00,542
>> PAM: Hang on, let me grab a
470
00:11:00,544 --> 00:11:01,543
name tag.
471
00:11:01,545 --> 00:11:02,711
>> ARCHER: (gasps) Ruby! Ruby!
472
00:11:02,713 --> 00:11:03,712
Is there a Ruby?
473
00:11:03,714 --> 00:11:04,713
See if there's a Ruby.
474
00:11:04,715 --> 00:11:06,014
Is there a Ruby?!
475
00:11:06,016 --> 00:11:07,049
>> PAM: It's pretty close to
476
00:11:07,051 --> 00:11:08,050
Ruby.
477
00:11:08,052 --> 00:11:09,051
>> ARCHER: No, Pam, it isn't.
478
00:11:09,053 --> 00:11:10,052
>> PAM: Well, why do...
479
00:11:10,054 --> 00:11:11,053
>> ARCHER: Don't worry about it.
480
00:11:11,055 --> 00:11:12,054
Let it go.
481
00:11:12,056 --> 00:11:13,589
And give me one of those mints.
482
00:11:13,591 --> 00:11:15,557
>> PAM: Dude, they're cocaine.
483
00:11:15,559 --> 00:11:16,592
>> ARCHER: (sighs) Of course
484
00:11:16,594 --> 00:11:17,759
they are.
485
00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:18,760
>> PAM: (laughs) Right?
486
00:11:18,762 --> 00:11:19,795
>> ARCHER: All right, here's the
487
00:11:19,797 --> 00:11:20,796
penthouse.
488
00:11:20,798 --> 00:11:21,797
Now, I cannot stress this
489
00:11:21,799 --> 00:11:23,732
enough, Pam: follow my lead.
490
00:11:23,734 --> 00:11:24,800
>> PAM: Okay.
491
00:11:24,802 --> 00:11:26,034
>> ARCHER: Room ser...
492
00:11:26,036 --> 00:11:27,536
>> PAM: Housekeeping!
493
00:11:27,538 --> 00:11:28,570
>> ARCHER: (clears throat) What
494
00:11:28,572 --> 00:11:29,571
did I just...
495
00:11:29,573 --> 00:11:31,039
>> PAM: Prostitute!
496
00:11:31,041 --> 00:11:32,107
(gasps, grunts)
497
00:11:32,109 --> 00:11:33,108
>> RICKY: What the hell is your
498
00:11:33,110 --> 00:11:34,109
problem?
499
00:11:34,111 --> 00:11:37,212
>> PAM: Besides my face hurts?
500
00:11:37,214 --> 00:11:38,280
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Why do I pay
501
00:11:38,282 --> 00:11:39,915
you 20 grand a month?
502
00:11:39,917 --> 00:11:41,049
I don't want to read about Kenny
503
00:11:41,051 --> 00:11:42,751
Loggins; I want to read about
504
00:11:42,753 --> 00:11:44,152
K-Log.
505
00:11:44,154 --> 00:11:46,154
(sighs) Jesus, don't ever get a
506
00:11:46,156 --> 00:11:47,990
publicist.
507
00:11:47,992 --> 00:11:49,091
>> ARCHER: Well, as a lowly room
508
00:11:49,093 --> 00:11:51,159
service waiter, I probably
509
00:11:51,161 --> 00:11:52,794
won't, but...
510
00:11:52,796 --> 00:11:54,796
Wow. Okay, uh...
511
00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:55,797
>> KENNY LOGGINS: K-Log didn't
512
00:11:55,799 --> 00:11:56,932
order room service.
513
00:11:56,934 --> 00:11:59,101
>> ARCHER: Sure, you did.
514
00:11:59,103 --> 00:12:00,936
>> KENNY LOGGINS: No, I didn't.
515
00:12:00,938 --> 00:12:02,237
(crash, glass shatters)
516
00:12:02,239 --> 00:12:03,739
(Pam grunting)
517
00:12:03,741 --> 00:12:04,740
>> ARCHER: A housekeeper and/or
518
00:12:04,742 --> 00:12:05,641
prostitute?
519
00:12:05,643 --> 00:12:06,642
>> KENNY LOGGINS: You think
520
00:12:06,644 --> 00:12:07,743
K-Log needs to pay for sex, do
521
00:12:07,745 --> 00:12:08,910
you?
522
00:12:08,912 --> 00:12:10,278
>> ARCHER: Mm... no, but, that
523
00:12:10,280 --> 00:12:12,748
being said, I do think he needs
524
00:12:12,750 --> 00:12:14,249
to reevaluate this whole K-Log
525
00:12:14,251 --> 00:12:15,751
thing.
526
00:12:15,753 --> 00:12:16,752
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Oh, yeah?
527
00:12:16,754 --> 00:12:17,753
Well, I think you need to
528
00:12:17,755 --> 00:12:18,987
reevaluate your face.
529
00:12:18,989 --> 00:12:20,288
>> ARCHER: My... Oh.
530
00:12:20,290 --> 00:12:21,289
(chuckles) Okay.
531
00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:22,290
I can explain that.
532
00:12:22,292 --> 00:12:23,291
>> KENNY LOGGINS: How?
533
00:12:23,293 --> 00:12:25,193
>> ARCHER: Uh... lip chemo?
534
00:12:25,195 --> 00:12:26,194
>> RICKY: It's the crazy guy
535
00:12:26,196 --> 00:12:27,195
from the lobby.
536
00:12:27,197 --> 00:12:28,196
Which means you're no
537
00:12:28,198 --> 00:12:29,665
prostitute.
538
00:12:29,667 --> 00:12:31,333
>> PAM: And, that being said, I
539
00:12:31,335 --> 00:12:33,301
am open to blow jobs for money.
540
00:12:33,303 --> 00:12:34,302
I only got eight bucks on me,
541
00:12:34,304 --> 00:12:35,303
but...
542
00:12:35,305 --> 00:12:36,304
>> ARCHER: Pam!
543
00:12:36,306 --> 00:12:37,873
Self-esteem, buddy. Come on.
544
00:12:37,875 --> 00:12:39,007
Now, let's just put the gun down
545
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:40,008
and...
546
00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:41,009
>> RICKY: Mr. Loggins, please
547
00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:42,010
advise.
548
00:12:42,012 --> 00:12:43,011
>> KENNY LOGGINS: K-Log.
549
00:12:43,013 --> 00:12:44,112
K-Log, damn it.
550
00:12:44,114 --> 00:12:45,180
>> RICKY: Yeah, I'm kind of with
551
00:12:45,182 --> 00:12:46,682
him on that one.
552
00:12:46,684 --> 00:12:47,683
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Oh, really?
553
00:12:47,685 --> 00:12:49,151
So you agree with Borgnar's
554
00:12:49,153 --> 00:12:51,019
pathetic little errand boy?
555
00:12:51,021 --> 00:12:52,020
>> ARCHER: Wait, what?
556
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:53,021
And also who?
557
00:12:53,023 --> 00:12:54,022
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Well, I'll
558
00:12:54,024 --> 00:12:55,123
tell you the same thing I told
559
00:12:55,125 --> 00:12:56,124
Borgnar that night in Caracas.
560
00:12:56,126 --> 00:12:57,159
It's not for sale.
561
00:12:57,161 --> 00:12:58,160
At any price.
562
00:12:58,162 --> 00:12:59,161
>> ARCHER: Who the hell is
563
00:12:59,163 --> 00:13:00,162
Bor... (grunts)
564
00:13:00,164 --> 00:13:01,163
(gunshot, glass shatters)
565
00:13:01,165 --> 00:13:02,164
(Pam shouts)
566
00:13:02,166 --> 00:13:03,165
(Ricky screams)
567
00:13:03,167 --> 00:13:04,166
(gunshots)
568
00:13:04,168 --> 00:13:05,167
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Hi-yah!
569
00:13:05,169 --> 00:13:06,168
(Archer grunts)
570
00:13:06,170 --> 00:13:07,169
Ricky, attack!
571
00:13:07,171 --> 00:13:08,737
>> PAM (chuckling): Yeah, Ricky.
572
00:13:08,739 --> 00:13:11,039
(Ricky and Pam grunting)
573
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,240
(Ricky screams)
574
00:13:12,242 --> 00:13:13,675
>> ARCHER: Okay. Okay, good.
575
00:13:13,677 --> 00:13:14,843
Pam, are you good?
576
00:13:14,845 --> 00:13:17,713
>> PAM (chuckling): Oh, yeah.
577
00:13:17,715 --> 00:13:19,981
(Ricky and Pam roaring)
578
00:13:19,983 --> 00:13:21,883
(Ricky and Pam grunting)
579
00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:23,318
>> ARCHER: Yeah, good, okay.
580
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:24,386
'Cause this time, I may actually
581
00:13:24,388 --> 00:13:25,387
murder Kenny Loggins.
582
00:13:25,389 --> 00:13:26,388
>> PAM: Wait, wait, wait, wait,
583
00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:27,389
wait!
584
00:13:27,391 --> 00:13:28,356
>> ARCHER: What, Pam?!
585
00:13:28,358 --> 00:13:29,658
>> PAM: First see if he wants
586
00:13:29,660 --> 00:13:32,060
a beej.
587
00:13:37,667 --> 00:13:38,667
(crashing, fighting)
588
00:13:38,669 --> 00:13:39,735
>> ARCHER: Loggins! Loggins!
589
00:13:39,737 --> 00:13:41,069
Now, look, before either of us
590
00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:42,170
does something we'll both
591
00:13:42,172 --> 00:13:43,205
regret, let's...
592
00:13:43,207 --> 00:13:45,574
(gunshots)
593
00:13:45,576 --> 00:13:48,410
Okay, that's just unacceptable.
594
00:13:48,412 --> 00:13:49,611
Pam, I'm going in!
595
00:13:49,613 --> 00:13:51,079
>> PAM: Okay!
596
00:13:51,081 --> 00:13:52,748
(both grunting)
597
00:13:52,750 --> 00:13:56,084
(Archer grunts)
598
00:13:56,086 --> 00:13:57,385
(sniffing)
599
00:13:57,387 --> 00:13:58,754
(coughs)
600
00:13:58,756 --> 00:14:00,722
>> ARCHER: Oh, wow, he really
601
00:14:00,724 --> 00:14:02,124
likes the Paco Rabanne.
602
00:14:02,126 --> 00:14:03,125
(gasps)
603
00:14:03,127 --> 00:14:04,459
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Tell Borgnar
604
00:14:04,461 --> 00:14:06,628
I'll see him in hell!
605
00:14:08,531 --> 00:14:10,432
>> ARCHER: Um, what the shit,
606
00:14:10,434 --> 00:14:11,767
Loggins?!
607
00:14:11,769 --> 00:14:14,703
(Kenny Loggins chuckles)
608
00:14:14,705 --> 00:14:16,238
Wonder if it's too late
609
00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:18,206
to get Messina.
610
00:14:18,208 --> 00:14:20,108
Holy shit.
611
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:21,777
What kind of colossal idiot
612
00:14:21,779 --> 00:14:23,278
would build a pool like that?
613
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:24,646
>> CHERLENE: I just want to go
614
00:14:24,648 --> 00:14:25,747
on record as saying
615
00:14:25,749 --> 00:14:27,149
that a glass swimming pool on
616
00:14:27,151 --> 00:14:28,316
the penthouse balcony is,
617
00:14:28,318 --> 00:14:29,251
without a doubt,
618
00:14:29,253 --> 00:14:30,485
the absolute worst idea that
619
00:14:30,487 --> 00:14:32,320
I have ever heard in my entire
620
00:14:32,322 --> 00:14:34,256
goddamn life.
621
00:14:34,258 --> 00:14:36,658
But you're the men, so...
622
00:14:36,660 --> 00:14:38,093
>> ARCHER: (chuckles) But can
623
00:14:38,095 --> 00:14:38,827
you imagine banging in
624
00:14:38,829 --> 00:14:39,795
that thing?
625
00:14:39,797 --> 00:14:41,663
Why, yes, Archer, yes, I can.
626
00:14:41,665 --> 00:14:42,731
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Drop it!
627
00:14:42,733 --> 00:14:43,632
(gun cocks)
628
00:14:43,634 --> 00:14:44,833
Drop it on the ground.
629
00:14:44,835 --> 00:14:46,101
>> ARCHER: Do you know how bad
630
00:14:46,103 --> 00:14:46,802
that is for it?
631
00:14:46,804 --> 00:14:48,236
I will place it on the ground,
632
00:14:48,238 --> 00:14:49,070
but...
633
00:14:49,072 --> 00:14:50,105
>> KENNY LOGGINS: You think
634
00:14:50,107 --> 00:14:51,473
K-Log won't shoot, punk?
635
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:53,475
>> ARCHER: No, I think K-Log is
636
00:14:53,477 --> 00:14:54,309
out of bullets.
637
00:14:54,311 --> 00:14:55,243
>> KENNY LOGGINS: What?
638
00:14:55,245 --> 00:14:55,744
(gun clicks)
639
00:14:55,746 --> 00:14:56,745
How did you...
640
00:14:56,747 --> 00:14:57,746
>> ARCHER: It's just a thing
641
00:14:57,748 --> 00:14:58,747
I do.
642
00:14:58,749 --> 00:14:59,748
Now what the hell is in that
643
00:14:59,750 --> 00:15:00,782
briefcase?
644
00:15:00,784 --> 00:15:01,783
>> KENNY LOGGINS: As if you
645
00:15:01,785 --> 00:15:02,784
don't know.
646
00:15:02,786 --> 00:15:03,785
>> ARCHER: I honestly don't.
647
00:15:03,787 --> 00:15:04,786
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Liar.
648
00:15:04,788 --> 00:15:05,821
>> ARCHER: (chuckles) Look, I
649
00:15:05,823 --> 00:15:06,855
put my weapon down, I'm not a
650
00:15:06,857 --> 00:15:08,156
threat; how would I know what's
651
00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:09,157
in...?
652
00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:10,158
>> RICKY: Aah!
653
00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:12,160
(Pam growling)
654
00:15:12,162 --> 00:15:13,295
(Kenny Loggins grunts)
655
00:15:13,297 --> 00:15:14,462
>> ARCHER: Pam, no, no, no, no,
656
00:15:14,464 --> 00:15:15,463
no, don't, no, don't...
657
00:15:15,465 --> 00:15:17,632
(gunshot)
658
00:15:17,634 --> 00:15:18,700
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Shit.
659
00:15:18,702 --> 00:15:19,935
>> ARCHER: Ooh, okay.
660
00:15:19,937 --> 00:15:21,503
So one of...
661
00:15:21,505 --> 00:15:22,838
(glass cracks)
662
00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:25,173
One fairly predictable thing is
663
00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:27,175
gonna happen now, so...
664
00:15:27,177 --> 00:15:28,109
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Aah!
665
00:15:28,111 --> 00:15:29,110
>> PAM and RICKY: Aah!
666
00:15:29,112 --> 00:15:31,613
>> ARCHER: Loggins!
667
00:15:31,615 --> 00:15:33,148
(Loggins grunts)
668
00:15:33,150 --> 00:15:34,850
>> ARCHER: Ooh.
669
00:15:34,852 --> 00:15:36,518
>> KENNY LOGGINS: (coughs) You
670
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:37,552
saved me.
671
00:15:37,554 --> 00:15:38,553
But why?
672
00:15:38,555 --> 00:15:39,654
>> ARCHER: What do you mean why?
673
00:15:39,656 --> 00:15:40,689
(coughs)
674
00:15:40,691 --> 00:15:41,690
I wanted you to play a baby
675
00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:42,891
shower. (coughs)
676
00:15:42,893 --> 00:15:44,492
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Wait, what?
677
00:15:44,494 --> 00:15:45,493
>> ARCHER: The Dirty Diaper
678
00:15:45,495 --> 00:15:46,494
game?
679
00:15:46,496 --> 00:15:48,230
Water guns shaped like dicks?
680
00:15:48,232 --> 00:15:49,331
A baby shower.
681
00:15:49,333 --> 00:15:50,332
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Oh.
682
00:15:50,334 --> 00:15:52,534
So, Borgnar? The briefcase?
683
00:15:52,536 --> 00:15:53,535
>> ARCHER: I don't know anyone
684
00:15:53,537 --> 00:15:54,536
named Borgnar.
685
00:15:54,538 --> 00:15:55,570
And I don't want your crazy
686
00:15:55,572 --> 00:15:56,571
briefcase.
687
00:15:56,573 --> 00:15:57,572
What the hell is even in that
688
00:15:57,574 --> 00:15:58,573
thing?
689
00:15:58,575 --> 00:15:59,574
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Don't worry
690
00:15:59,576 --> 00:16:00,575
about it.
691
00:16:00,577 --> 00:16:01,710
Just let it go.
692
00:16:01,712 --> 00:16:02,744
>> ARCHER: I should let you go.
693
00:16:02,746 --> 00:16:03,745
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Look, I'm...
694
00:16:03,747 --> 00:16:04,746
you know...
695
00:16:04,748 --> 00:16:05,814
>> ARCHER: Sorry?
696
00:16:05,816 --> 00:16:07,215
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Mm, more just
697
00:16:07,217 --> 00:16:08,316
embarrassed.
698
00:16:08,318 --> 00:16:09,217
Is there some way I can make
699
00:16:09,219 --> 00:16:10,218
this all up to you?
700
00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:11,219
>> PAM: A beej!
701
00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:12,220
>> ARCHER: Pam!
702
00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:14,189
And no, Kenny Loggins, there's
703
00:16:14,191 --> 00:16:15,257
no way to make up for almost
704
00:16:15,259 --> 00:16:16,758
killing me over a briefcase
705
00:16:16,760 --> 00:16:18,226
full of what I can only assume
706
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:20,195
is either plutonium or a human
707
00:16:20,197 --> 00:16:21,696
soul.
708
00:16:21,698 --> 00:16:23,598
(coughs) Although, that being
709
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:25,600
said...
710
00:16:25,602 --> 00:16:27,269
>> CHERLENE: It's in D minor; do
711
00:16:27,271 --> 00:16:28,436
you know what that is?
712
00:16:28,438 --> 00:16:30,272
Or even what chords are?
713
00:16:30,274 --> 00:16:31,740
>> KENNY LOGGINS: (sighs) Yes.
714
00:16:31,742 --> 00:16:32,741
>> CHERLENE: Wow, snotty.
715
00:16:32,743 --> 00:16:34,409
Okay, fine, so during the boring
716
00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:35,410
parts, just scream "outlaw
717
00:16:35,412 --> 00:16:36,411
country."
718
00:16:36,413 --> 00:16:37,412
>> KENNY LOGGINS: Yeah,
719
00:16:37,414 --> 00:16:40,448
absolutely not.
720
00:16:40,450 --> 00:16:41,516
>> CHERLENE: ¶ Revvin' up your
721
00:16:41,518 --> 00:16:43,418
engine, listen to her howlin'
722
00:16:43,420 --> 00:16:44,419
roar... ¶
723
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:45,520
(Lana squeals)
724
00:16:45,522 --> 00:16:46,521
Ugh!
725
00:16:46,523 --> 00:16:48,023
>> ALL: Happy baby shower!
726
00:16:48,025 --> 00:16:49,024
(cork pops)
727
00:16:49,026 --> 00:16:50,392
>> LANA: Oh, my God, you guys.
728
00:16:50,394 --> 00:16:51,459
>> KRIEGER: Me first, here!
729
00:16:51,461 --> 00:16:52,794
It's a breast pump.
730
00:16:52,796 --> 00:16:53,795
Go ahead and use it now if you
731
00:16:53,797 --> 00:16:54,562
want.
732
00:16:54,564 --> 00:16:56,231
>> LANA: I do not want, Krieger,
733
00:16:56,233 --> 00:16:57,299
but thank you.
734
00:16:57,301 --> 00:16:58,934
Aw, and thank you, Pam.
735
00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:00,435
>> PAM: It's cocaine!
736
00:17:00,437 --> 00:17:01,937
>> LANA: Oh, of course it is.
737
00:17:01,939 --> 00:17:02,938
And also, what the hell
738
00:17:02,940 --> 00:17:03,939
happened to you?
739
00:17:03,941 --> 00:17:05,307
>> PAM: This big bastard.
740
00:17:05,309 --> 00:17:06,308
>> LANA: What big...?
741
00:17:06,310 --> 00:17:07,309
Whoa.
742
00:17:07,311 --> 00:17:08,877
>> RICKY: Uh, hi.
743
00:17:08,879 --> 00:17:10,712
Um, this is a car seat.
744
00:17:10,714 --> 00:17:11,446
>> GILLETTE: Wha...
745
00:17:11,448 --> 00:17:12,814
Goddamn it!
746
00:17:12,816 --> 00:17:13,982
This whole stupid baby shower
747
00:17:13,984 --> 00:17:15,884
was my idea! (sobbing)
748
00:17:15,886 --> 00:17:17,319
>> CHERLENE/LOGGINS: ¶ Highway
749
00:17:17,321 --> 00:17:20,555
to the danger zone
750
00:17:20,557 --> 00:17:21,790
>> KENNY LOGGINS: ¶ I'll take
751
00:17:21,792 --> 00:17:25,060
you right into the danger
752
00:17:25,062 --> 00:17:26,928
zone... ¶
753
00:17:26,930 --> 00:17:27,929
>> CYRIL: Here.
754
00:17:27,931 --> 00:17:30,332
>> LANA: Oh, wow, a check.
755
00:17:30,334 --> 00:17:31,933
For $80.
756
00:17:31,935 --> 00:17:33,268
>> CYRIL: Please take me back.
757
00:17:33,270 --> 00:17:35,337
>> LANA: Aw, Cyril.
758
00:17:35,339 --> 00:17:36,338
Who's next?
759
00:17:36,340 --> 00:17:37,472
>> MALORY: Well, I suppose me.
760
00:17:37,474 --> 00:17:38,940
And all of this.
761
00:17:38,942 --> 00:17:39,941
It's a layette.
762
00:17:39,943 --> 00:17:41,509
Onesies, binkies,
763
00:17:41,511 --> 00:17:42,944
itty bitty booties, blah blah
764
00:17:42,946 --> 00:17:43,945
blah.
765
00:17:43,947 --> 00:17:45,747
From baby Bergdorf's.
766
00:17:45,749 --> 00:17:47,682
>> LANA: Oh, my God, it must've
767
00:17:47,684 --> 00:17:48,683
been a fortune.
768
00:17:48,685 --> 00:17:49,751
>> MALORY: Well, I can afford
769
00:17:49,753 --> 00:17:50,752
it.
770
00:17:50,754 --> 00:17:52,320
Apparently, Krieger's online
771
00:17:52,322 --> 00:17:53,488
pharmacy is going gangbusters,
772
00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:54,489
so...
773
00:17:54,491 --> 00:17:56,091
>> WOODHOUSE: Pardon me, mum.
774
00:17:56,093 --> 00:17:57,926
This was delivered for
775
00:17:57,928 --> 00:17:58,927
Dr. Krieger.
776
00:17:58,929 --> 00:17:59,928
>> KRIEGER: What...?
777
00:17:59,930 --> 00:18:01,029
Not now, you shriveled...
778
00:18:01,031 --> 00:18:02,430
>> MALORY: Wait a minute.
779
00:18:02,432 --> 00:18:03,798
That's the cocaine.
780
00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:04,866
So this whole thing was just a
781
00:18:04,868 --> 00:18:05,867
sham?
782
00:18:05,869 --> 00:18:06,868
>> KRIEGER: Well, only if by
783
00:18:06,870 --> 00:18:08,636
"sham" you mean "sham."
784
00:18:08,638 --> 00:18:09,804
>> MALORY: (growls) Krieger!
785
00:18:09,806 --> 00:18:10,805
>> KRIEGER: Aah! But you were
786
00:18:10,807 --> 00:18:11,806
temporarily so happy!
787
00:18:11,808 --> 00:18:12,807
>> CYRIL: Krieger, get back
788
00:18:12,809 --> 00:18:13,708
here!
789
00:18:13,710 --> 00:18:15,810
>> PAM: Yay!
790
00:18:15,812 --> 00:18:16,878
>> KENNY LOGGINS: ¶ You'll never
791
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:19,381
say hello to you until you get
792
00:18:19,383 --> 00:18:22,017
it on red line overload ¶
793
00:18:22,019 --> 00:18:23,351
>> CHERLENE: ¶ You'll never know
794
00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:25,387
what you can do until you get it
795
00:18:25,389 --> 00:18:27,055
up as high as you can ¶
796
00:18:27,057 --> 00:18:29,024
>> CHERLENE/LOGGINS: ¶ Go...
797
00:18:29,026 --> 00:18:30,025
>> LANA: Wow.
798
00:18:30,027 --> 00:18:31,459
This baby shower actually went
799
00:18:31,461 --> 00:18:32,460
a lot better than I would've
800
00:18:32,462 --> 00:18:33,461
imagined.
801
00:18:33,463 --> 00:18:34,462
>> ARCHER: Right?
802
00:18:34,464 --> 00:18:35,463
>> LANA: And what happened to
803
00:18:35,465 --> 00:18:36,464
you?
804
00:18:36,466 --> 00:18:37,699
>> ARCHER: Your present, Lana,
805
00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:38,700
is what happened.
806
00:18:38,702 --> 00:18:39,734
>> LANA: And it's...
807
00:18:39,736 --> 00:18:40,568
where, exactly?
808
00:18:40,570 --> 00:18:41,569
>> ARCHER: What, are you...
809
00:18:41,571 --> 00:18:42,570
are you kidding?
810
00:18:42,572 --> 00:18:43,571
It's...
811
00:18:43,573 --> 00:18:44,572
>> WOODHOUSE: Right here, miss.
812
00:18:44,574 --> 00:18:45,573
(Lana gasps)
813
00:18:45,575 --> 00:18:46,574
>> ARCHER: Wha...
814
00:18:46,576 --> 00:18:47,909
That's my crib!
815
00:18:47,911 --> 00:18:50,078
Uh, which I want you to have for
816
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:51,679
the baby.
817
00:18:51,681 --> 00:18:52,914
>> LANA: (gasps) Archer.
818
00:18:52,916 --> 00:18:53,915
>> ARCHER: Because you're
819
00:18:53,917 --> 00:18:55,517
important to me, so I made
820
00:18:55,519 --> 00:18:57,352
Woodhouse get it from Mother's
821
00:18:57,354 --> 00:19:00,055
storage unit, because I own him.
822
00:19:00,057 --> 00:19:01,389
>> LANA: Archer. (sniffles)
823
00:19:01,391 --> 00:19:02,657
Archer, that is the sweetest
824
00:19:02,659 --> 00:19:05,727
thing anybody has ever given me,
825
00:19:05,729 --> 00:19:06,728
ever.
826
00:19:06,730 --> 00:19:07,829
>> ARCHER: Well, yeah.
827
00:19:07,831 --> 00:19:09,397
But, I mean, the big present,
828
00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:11,666
obviously, is, uh...
829
00:19:11,668 --> 00:19:13,935
"Danger Zone."
830
00:19:13,937 --> 00:19:15,103
>> LANA: "Danger Zone."
831
00:19:15,105 --> 00:19:16,538
>> ARCHER: The...
832
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:17,772
Lana, the song.
833
00:19:17,774 --> 00:19:19,441
>> CHERLENE/LOGGINS: ¶ Highway
834
00:19:19,443 --> 00:19:23,945
to the danger zone
835
00:19:23,947 --> 00:19:32,787
Right into the danger zone...
836
00:19:32,789 --> 00:19:36,091
Ooh... ¶
837
00:19:36,093 --> 00:19:37,125
>> LANA: Oh.
838
00:19:37,127 --> 00:19:38,860
Oh, okay.
839
00:19:38,862 --> 00:19:40,195
>> ARCHER: "Danger Zone," Lana.
840
00:19:40,197 --> 00:19:42,530
You know, how I'm always saying
841
00:19:42,532 --> 00:19:44,032
"danger zone"?
842
00:19:44,034 --> 00:19:45,800
>> LANA: Uh, kinda?
843
00:19:45,802 --> 00:19:46,868
Yes?
844
00:19:46,870 --> 00:19:47,869
>> ARCHER: Well...
845
00:19:47,871 --> 00:19:48,870
>> LANA: It's from a song?
846
00:19:48,872 --> 00:19:49,871
>> ARCHER: Yes, it's from a
847
00:19:49,873 --> 00:19:50,872
song!
848
00:19:50,874 --> 00:19:52,540
Recorded by Grammy winner and
849
00:19:52,542 --> 00:19:54,142
possible Faustian bargain-maker
850
00:19:54,144 --> 00:19:56,077
Kenny goddamn Loggins!
851
00:19:56,079 --> 00:19:57,812
>> LANA: (chuckles) Okay, calm
852
00:19:57,814 --> 00:19:59,581
down.
853
00:19:59,583 --> 00:20:01,549
So who's Beard Guy?
854
00:20:01,551 --> 00:20:02,550
>> ARCHER: (scoffs) Are you...?
855
00:20:02,552 --> 00:20:03,551
That's Kenny Loggins!
856
00:20:03,553 --> 00:20:04,552
>> LANA: (gasps)
857
00:20:04,554 --> 00:20:05,553
From Kenny Loggins Roasters?
858
00:20:05,555 --> 00:20:06,554
Captioned by
859
00:20:06,556 --> 00:20:07,555
Media Access Group at WGBH
860
00:20:07,557 --> 00:20:10,492
access.wgbh.org
861
00:20:10,494 --> 00:20:11,559
>> CHERLENE/LOGGINS: ¶ Gonna
862
00:20:11,561 --> 00:20:14,295
take you right into the danger
863
00:20:14,297 --> 00:20:17,098
¶ zone
864
00:20:17,100 --> 00:20:23,004
Highway to the danger zone
865
00:20:23,006 --> 00:20:29,611
¶ Right into the danger zone
866
00:20:29,613 --> 00:20:35,250
Highway to the danger zone
867
00:20:35,252 --> 00:20:43,358
Right into the danger zone. ¶
868
00:20:43,360 --> 00:20:47,662
>> MAN: Made... in Georgia.
868
00:20:48,305 --> 00:21:48,542
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.