1 00:00:02,646 --> 00:00:04,232 Previously on "Future Man"... 2 00:00:04,233 --> 00:00:06,027 Down on the ground. 3 00:00:06,028 --> 00:00:07,697 Your little time-traveling caper, repeating the same 4 00:00:07,698 --> 00:00:09,827 11 seconds over and over and over again? 5 00:00:09,828 --> 00:00:11,998 It ripped a hole in the space-time continuum. 6 00:00:11,999 --> 00:00:13,375 - What the...? - And the punishment 7 00:00:13,376 --> 00:00:14,920 for time crimes is death. 8 00:00:17,134 --> 00:00:19,387 - You are our savior. - No! 9 00:00:19,388 --> 00:00:21,099 And because of that, I will help you escape. 10 00:00:21,100 --> 00:00:23,145 If they cancel the show, the network 11 00:00:23,146 --> 00:00:25,316 - will take me and Stanley away. - That's not gonna happen. 12 00:00:25,317 --> 00:00:26,986 Tiger and Wolf, if they keep this up, 13 00:00:26,987 --> 00:00:28,530 we're gonna have to release the killing machine, 14 00:00:28,531 --> 00:00:29,909 and we've never had to do that. 15 00:00:29,910 --> 00:00:32,748 - The fuck are you doing? - Escaping. 16 00:00:32,749 --> 00:00:34,960 Well, can you believe this shit? 17 00:00:44,230 --> 00:00:46,608 There's no sign of them in the Bone Desert. 18 00:00:46,609 --> 00:00:49,447 Go check Hair and Makeup. Go! 19 00:01:02,266 --> 00:01:05,271 Another escape on your watch, Saint Jackalope? 20 00:01:05,272 --> 00:01:06,523 Haven't changed at all 21 00:01:06,524 --> 00:01:08,485 since the Academy of Television and Justice. 22 00:01:08,486 --> 00:01:10,782 All sizzle, no steak. 23 00:01:10,783 --> 00:01:12,911 Get bent, Mathers. You're not needed here. 24 00:01:12,912 --> 00:01:14,999 I got this under control. 25 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,545 Network Security Affairs feels differently. 26 00:01:17,546 --> 00:01:19,925 And as long as I'm wearing the tuft, 27 00:01:19,926 --> 00:01:23,682 you will address me by my rank. 28 00:01:27,274 --> 00:01:30,989 Marshal Mathers. When did you get promoted? 29 00:01:30,990 --> 00:01:32,617 Oh, what? 30 00:01:32,618 --> 00:01:35,164 You didn't think someone like me could rise to such heights? 31 00:01:35,165 --> 00:01:36,959 Someone like you? We've been through this. 32 00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:42,053 I have no problem with those who came out of a... 33 00:01:42,054 --> 00:01:43,263 uh... 34 00:01:43,264 --> 00:01:45,309 - Say it. - I'd rather not. 35 00:01:45,310 --> 00:01:46,561 Vagina. 36 00:01:46,562 --> 00:01:48,482 Ugh, it sounds so much worse when you say it. 37 00:01:48,483 --> 00:01:50,611 You know, people who gestate in a hyper-sac 38 00:01:50,612 --> 00:01:52,783 and come out as fully-formed adults... 39 00:01:52,784 --> 00:01:54,828 You mean the norm, the societal norm? Yes, go on? 40 00:01:54,829 --> 00:01:57,083 Have looked down on me my whole life, but guess what? 41 00:01:57,084 --> 00:02:00,506 I'm the first natural-born to make Marshall, 42 00:02:00,507 --> 00:02:02,426 and I'm not stopping there. 43 00:02:02,427 --> 00:02:04,807 Entertainment should not be a co-equal branch 44 00:02:04,808 --> 00:02:07,269 of the government, and when I'm in control, 45 00:02:07,270 --> 00:02:09,440 I'm gonna do things the way the network 46 00:02:09,441 --> 00:02:11,361 did them in the '50s. 47 00:02:11,362 --> 00:02:15,202 The 3150s were a pretty backwards time. 48 00:02:15,203 --> 00:02:17,164 Simpler time when the justice system 49 00:02:17,165 --> 00:02:20,755 wasn't supported by ads and babies slid out of... 50 00:02:20,756 --> 00:02:22,843 human vaginas. 51 00:02:25,181 --> 00:02:26,726 I just checked Hair and Makeup. 52 00:02:26,727 --> 00:02:28,353 They're dead. Everyone. 53 00:02:28,354 --> 00:02:31,276 Hair, makeup, I mean all of them, dead. 54 00:02:31,277 --> 00:02:32,946 Have a sidebar next time. 55 00:02:32,947 --> 00:02:35,159 Right, you have this under control. 56 00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:37,914 I do have all this... look, they're my contestants. 57 00:02:37,915 --> 00:02:41,421 This is my show and as long as they are loose on my set, 58 00:02:41,422 --> 00:02:44,010 I'm gonna be the one to bring them in. 59 00:02:44,011 --> 00:02:47,475 So... relax. 60 00:02:47,476 --> 00:02:49,146 What do you want? 61 00:02:51,275 --> 00:02:52,527 Come on! 62 00:02:54,573 --> 00:02:56,284 When are we? 63 00:02:56,285 --> 00:02:58,455 Also... where are we? 64 00:03:01,504 --> 00:03:03,256 France? 65 00:03:07,892 --> 00:03:09,519 What? Don't look at me. 66 00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:11,982 This thing's neural interface sends indecipherable code 67 00:03:11,983 --> 00:03:13,693 directly to my mind's eye, and I'm pretty sure I just 68 00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:17,034 pressed a button with what... my mind's thumb? 69 00:03:17,035 --> 00:03:19,539 So that thing moves us across time and space? 70 00:03:19,540 --> 00:03:23,756 Hmm... that's a new and fresh concept. 71 00:03:23,757 --> 00:03:25,844 I like it. 72 00:03:25,845 --> 00:03:27,973 These three aren't contestants anymore. 73 00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:31,480 They're fugitives. My fugitives. 74 00:03:32,859 --> 00:03:34,277 Listen up! 75 00:03:34,278 --> 00:03:36,614 These three have been on the run for 12 minutes. 76 00:03:36,615 --> 00:03:38,953 They have stolen a time-travel device, 77 00:03:38,954 --> 00:03:42,501 which means they can be anytime, anywhere. 78 00:03:42,502 --> 00:03:46,927 Let's set up a 240-million year radius, B. C. to A. D. 79 00:03:46,928 --> 00:03:49,181 What I want out of each and every one of you 80 00:03:49,182 --> 00:03:51,561 is a hard target search of every timeline, 81 00:03:51,562 --> 00:03:53,440 state line, breadline, 82 00:03:53,441 --> 00:03:54,985 chorus line, drum line. 83 00:03:54,986 --> 00:03:56,989 We're looking for historical anomalies, 84 00:03:56,990 --> 00:03:58,743 changes in the record. 85 00:03:58,744 --> 00:04:01,414 I want you cross-referencing ancient texts, 86 00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:04,211 scrolls, artifacts, cave drawings, 87 00:04:04,212 --> 00:04:06,800 telegrams, holograms, sonograms, 88 00:04:06,801 --> 00:04:09,932 hit records, world records, dental records. 89 00:04:09,933 --> 00:04:11,727 Gonna turn up somewhere, 90 00:04:11,728 --> 00:04:15,067 and somewhere is exactly where we're gonna be. 91 00:04:15,068 --> 00:04:17,864 Your fugitives names are... 92 00:04:17,865 --> 00:04:20,661 Joshua Sasha Futturman, 93 00:04:20,662 --> 00:04:22,832 Tiger, 94 00:04:22,833 --> 00:04:24,335 and Wolf. 95 00:04:24,336 --> 00:04:26,589 The clock is ticking. 96 00:04:30,766 --> 00:04:32,184 Let's go get 'em. 97 00:04:34,700 --> 00:04:38,216 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 98 00:04:43,207 --> 00:04:46,379 We need to figure out where and when we are. 99 00:04:46,380 --> 00:04:49,176 I don't suppose that either of you guys speak any French? 100 00:04:49,177 --> 00:04:51,472 - Un petit peu. - Great. 101 00:04:51,473 --> 00:04:54,478 Yeah, I used to train with van Damme back in the '90s. 102 00:04:54,479 --> 00:04:59,071 Let's just say I put the "VD" in JCVD. 103 00:04:59,072 --> 00:05:01,200 Are you saying that you gave 104 00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:03,371 Jean-Claude van Damme a venereal disease? 105 00:05:03,372 --> 00:05:04,833 That's exactly what I'm saying. 106 00:05:04,834 --> 00:05:05,918 - Oh. - And I picked up 107 00:05:05,919 --> 00:05:07,129 a little French along the way. 108 00:05:07,130 --> 00:05:08,673 Mostly when he was yelling at me 109 00:05:08,674 --> 00:05:11,054 - for giving him... le clap. - Great. 110 00:05:11,055 --> 00:05:12,431 I'm gonna wrestle up some grub. 111 00:05:12,432 --> 00:05:15,897 Okay. Well, I am going to go secure the perimeter. 112 00:05:15,898 --> 00:05:18,651 I mean, look at what these monsters are capable of. 113 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,572 I mean, clearly they are proud of it 114 00:05:20,573 --> 00:05:24,580 'cause that rack of ribs is everywhere, oy. 115 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:39,693 Are you there, God? It's me, Josh. 116 00:05:42,659 --> 00:05:46,416 Uh, okay... um... 117 00:05:46,417 --> 00:05:50,090 I've... I've never really been a religious person. 118 00:05:50,091 --> 00:05:52,469 Most people think I'm Jewish because of my last name 119 00:05:52,470 --> 00:05:57,271 and, well, I'm not really good at any sports. 120 00:05:57,272 --> 00:05:59,483 But I... 121 00:05:59,484 --> 00:06:03,074 wanted to say thank you for getting us here. 122 00:06:03,075 --> 00:06:04,368 God... 123 00:06:04,369 --> 00:06:05,662 Please don't call me that. 124 00:06:05,663 --> 00:06:07,709 What... what should I call you, then? 125 00:06:07,710 --> 00:06:10,255 How about... friend? 126 00:06:10,256 --> 00:06:12,760 Friend. "Oh, friend." 127 00:06:12,761 --> 00:06:14,555 Yeah, I like that. That's nice. 128 00:06:14,556 --> 00:06:18,062 Okay, uh, friend, I, um... 129 00:06:18,063 --> 00:06:21,027 I guess the big question is... 130 00:06:21,028 --> 00:06:22,696 what's... what's next for me? 131 00:06:22,697 --> 00:06:24,951 I'm really glad you asked that, Josh. 132 00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:26,747 You must come to me. 133 00:06:26,748 --> 00:06:29,210 In... Israel? 134 00:06:29,211 --> 00:06:31,339 No, never! 135 00:06:31,340 --> 00:06:34,637 You must get the time travel machine from Tiger. 136 00:06:34,638 --> 00:06:37,267 I will give you the coordinates to find me. 137 00:06:37,268 --> 00:06:38,771 And then you'll get me home? 138 00:06:38,772 --> 00:06:41,818 Yes, Josh. I will get you home. 139 00:06:41,819 --> 00:06:43,948 Oh, that sounds so good. 140 00:06:43,949 --> 00:06:45,826 Okay, um... 141 00:06:45,827 --> 00:06:48,373 I mean the hard part's gonna be getting the TTD from Tiger. 142 00:06:48,374 --> 00:06:50,001 She's very protective over her gadgets 143 00:06:50,002 --> 00:06:51,420 and she won't just hand it over. 144 00:06:51,421 --> 00:06:53,383 You just escaped The DieCathlon. 145 00:06:53,384 --> 00:06:54,928 You can do this. 146 00:06:54,929 --> 00:06:57,725 You believe in me, but I believe in you. 147 00:06:57,726 --> 00:07:00,940 You are special. Very, very special. 148 00:07:00,941 --> 00:07:02,902 And you are strong. 149 00:07:02,903 --> 00:07:04,154 He's weak. 150 00:07:04,155 --> 00:07:05,825 I want more eyes on the Futturman house. 151 00:07:05,826 --> 00:07:07,954 He's gonna make a play for home. 152 00:07:07,955 --> 00:07:11,168 Give me constant surveillance around known associates. 153 00:07:11,169 --> 00:07:13,757 Jim Cameron, Corey Hart, Estelle Kronish, 154 00:07:13,758 --> 00:07:15,928 OJ Simpson, Blaze Blazington, 155 00:07:15,929 --> 00:07:20,228 everyone in the Brat-Pack, especially the Estevezes. 156 00:07:21,648 --> 00:07:23,276 Mmm. 157 00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:25,572 Sandwiches in the Middle Ages were delicious. 158 00:07:25,573 --> 00:07:26,867 Mm-hmm. 159 00:07:26,868 --> 00:07:29,706 Don't give the Frenchies too much credit. 160 00:07:29,707 --> 00:07:31,835 They had some help. 161 00:07:31,836 --> 00:07:34,048 I got a ping on Timeline X1G7. 162 00:07:34,049 --> 00:07:35,633 Someone just invented sliced bread 163 00:07:35,634 --> 00:07:36,970 700 years too early. 164 00:07:41,521 --> 00:07:43,901 How do they even find us? 165 00:07:43,902 --> 00:07:45,947 No idea! 166 00:07:47,993 --> 00:07:49,287 Oh, shit! 167 00:07:50,539 --> 00:07:52,334 They tranqued my sando. 168 00:07:52,335 --> 00:07:54,004 No, no, no. Wolf, stop, stop! 169 00:07:54,005 --> 00:07:55,673 We are leaving. Tiger, come on. 170 00:07:55,674 --> 00:07:57,094 Just jump! 171 00:08:00,059 --> 00:08:01,394 That was a close one. 172 00:08:01,395 --> 00:08:03,231 We lost a good sandwich back there. 173 00:08:03,232 --> 00:08:05,193 Okay, where the hell are we? 174 00:08:05,194 --> 00:08:07,073 I have no idea. 175 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:11,790 Oh... narrowed it down to Asia. 176 00:08:14,839 --> 00:08:17,217 Show me the visual. 177 00:08:17,218 --> 00:08:19,388 That's them. 178 00:08:19,389 --> 00:08:21,977 When are you? 179 00:08:21,978 --> 00:08:25,442 You twisted time rogues. 180 00:08:25,443 --> 00:08:27,947 Stop it. Stop it! 181 00:08:27,948 --> 00:08:29,366 Just... just let it go. 182 00:08:31,663 --> 00:08:33,541 No can do. 183 00:08:35,129 --> 00:08:37,048 This man insulted me. 184 00:08:37,049 --> 00:08:39,344 All he did was say that your tea was over steeped. 185 00:08:39,345 --> 00:08:40,638 A little over steeped. 186 00:08:40,639 --> 00:08:43,603 Honor might mean jack shit to this bozo, 187 00:08:43,604 --> 00:08:46,650 but it sure means a hell of lot to me. 188 00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:49,198 Five minutes at 173! 189 00:08:49,199 --> 00:08:50,993 No, no! 190 00:08:52,538 --> 00:08:54,082 Wolf-Hart just decapitated 191 00:08:54,083 --> 00:08:56,838 Shoji the Honorable, wiping out an entire line 192 00:08:56,839 --> 00:08:58,132 of noble warriors. 193 00:08:58,133 --> 00:09:00,721 No more Shoji the Great, Shoji the Charitable, 194 00:09:00,722 --> 00:09:02,599 Shoji the Just, Shoji the Neighborly, 195 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:04,061 Shoji the Good Listener. 196 00:09:04,062 --> 00:09:05,522 What is that awful sound? 197 00:09:05,523 --> 00:09:07,609 Pretty sure that's the sound of a whole city crying. 198 00:09:08,738 --> 00:09:10,615 And that's a ceremonial war horn. 199 00:09:10,616 --> 00:09:12,160 Ooh, they're pissed about something. 200 00:09:12,161 --> 00:09:13,872 Something? You think maybe the guy Wolf 201 00:09:13,873 --> 00:09:15,542 just decapitated was important? 202 00:09:15,543 --> 00:09:17,546 Who cares? Use the time machine, already. 203 00:09:17,547 --> 00:09:18,883 Okay. 204 00:09:20,177 --> 00:09:22,723 We've lost them. 205 00:09:26,356 --> 00:09:28,401 Daddy is gonna fix this. 206 00:09:28,402 --> 00:09:31,323 He's going to find those escapees, 207 00:09:31,324 --> 00:09:33,787 he's gonna bring them back on the show, 208 00:09:33,788 --> 00:09:37,377 ratings... they're gonna be higher than ever. 209 00:09:37,378 --> 00:09:39,298 And then Daddy's gonna get that bonus 210 00:09:39,299 --> 00:09:41,510 he's been telling you about, 211 00:09:41,511 --> 00:09:43,891 a bonus that will let me 212 00:09:43,892 --> 00:09:47,733 turn our family into a forever unit. 213 00:09:52,116 --> 00:09:55,079 I love you so much, Stanley. 214 00:09:58,086 --> 00:10:00,298 I love you, too, honey. 215 00:10:03,765 --> 00:10:06,143 More than you know. 216 00:10:09,233 --> 00:10:12,322 Honey, no, not now. 217 00:10:12,323 --> 00:10:14,576 Honey, no. 218 00:10:14,577 --> 00:10:18,000 Honey, no... oh, honey... 219 00:10:18,001 --> 00:10:20,630 I'm gonna assume that's a network-issued cube 220 00:10:20,631 --> 00:10:22,008 you're tonguing down. 221 00:10:22,009 --> 00:10:24,847 This cube happens to be my wife, and we are proud 222 00:10:24,848 --> 00:10:28,354 to be celebrating the 35th month of our lease. 223 00:10:28,355 --> 00:10:30,274 Of course you have a Robo-Family. 224 00:10:30,275 --> 00:10:32,320 You prefer the cool, mechanical grip 225 00:10:32,321 --> 00:10:34,241 of a plezh-tube, don't you? 226 00:10:34,242 --> 00:10:36,203 What I do with my wife's plezh-tubes... 227 00:10:36,204 --> 00:10:38,374 three... are my business. 228 00:10:38,375 --> 00:10:40,211 Until I repossess your family and return them 229 00:10:40,212 --> 00:10:43,927 to the network as a result of your gross negligence. 230 00:10:46,599 --> 00:10:49,104 Aww... 231 00:10:49,105 --> 00:10:51,776 - Isn't that adorable? - Yes. 232 00:10:51,777 --> 00:10:54,031 You turned up the attachment settings. 233 00:10:54,032 --> 00:10:55,491 Maybe I'll take your daughter. 234 00:10:55,492 --> 00:10:58,414 My robo-Dobermans need a new play thing. 235 00:11:05,304 --> 00:11:09,603 Don't listen to her. 236 00:11:09,604 --> 00:11:12,902 I won't let her robo-Dobos anywhere near you. 237 00:11:18,121 --> 00:11:20,041 Pagliacci. 238 00:11:30,395 --> 00:11:31,940 All right, you're the history expert. 239 00:11:31,941 --> 00:11:33,692 - Where are we? - Thinking Kansas. 240 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,948 Could be modern-day Kansas or, like... 241 00:11:35,949 --> 00:11:37,952 "Wizard of Oz" times Kansas. 242 00:11:37,953 --> 00:11:40,958 Either way, we are definitely somewhere in middle America. 243 00:11:43,213 --> 00:11:45,174 Kansas... huh. 244 00:11:45,175 --> 00:11:47,053 Well, wasn't going for that at all. 245 00:11:47,054 --> 00:11:49,141 - Yeah. - Okay, Josh. 246 00:11:49,142 --> 00:11:51,145 Make your move. 247 00:11:51,146 --> 00:11:52,647 Hey, Tiger. 248 00:11:52,648 --> 00:11:54,317 Uh, since I am the history expert, 249 00:11:54,318 --> 00:11:55,904 maybe I could take the TTD 250 00:11:55,905 --> 00:11:57,157 - for a little spin? - Right. 251 00:11:57,158 --> 00:11:58,617 We've been in three time periods 252 00:11:58,618 --> 00:12:00,246 and you still haven't learned to tie a belt, 253 00:12:00,247 --> 00:12:02,751 so I'm gonna hang on to our lifeline. 254 00:12:02,752 --> 00:12:05,256 Oof, she mocks you so openly. 255 00:12:05,257 --> 00:12:06,926 - Yeah, I know. - First things first. 256 00:12:06,927 --> 00:12:08,805 I'm gonna pickle me the fuck out of some beets. 257 00:12:08,806 --> 00:12:10,308 - Okay. - Okay, that is like, 258 00:12:10,309 --> 00:12:12,562 maybe the tenth thing that we should be doing right now. 259 00:12:12,563 --> 00:12:14,316 Yeah? Name nine things before pickling beets. 260 00:12:14,317 --> 00:12:16,528 Okay, uh, well, we need clothing, 261 00:12:16,529 --> 00:12:19,785 we need shelter, we need... 262 00:12:19,786 --> 00:12:20,913 Keep going. Seven more. 263 00:12:20,914 --> 00:12:22,415 We need clothing and shelter. 264 00:12:22,416 --> 00:12:25,797 Boom... hay house, clothes string. 265 00:12:43,208 --> 00:12:45,544 No, no, this isn't happening. 266 00:12:45,545 --> 00:12:47,048 Fuck this shit. Futturman, give me those. 267 00:12:47,049 --> 00:12:48,634 I wear the pants. 268 00:12:50,138 --> 00:12:51,556 Oh, shit. 269 00:12:51,557 --> 00:12:53,519 I think we landed during the Civil War. 270 00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:56,566 Well, luckily for us, Kansas is pretty far away 271 00:12:56,567 --> 00:13:00,366 from... the Northern front? 272 00:13:03,081 --> 00:13:04,750 I can de-arm this woman. 273 00:13:04,751 --> 00:13:07,506 You mean, disarm? Like, take her weapon away? 274 00:13:08,718 --> 00:13:10,177 Yeah, I will take her gun 275 00:13:10,178 --> 00:13:12,557 when I take her arm off at the shoulder. 276 00:13:12,558 --> 00:13:13,977 We're not in The DieCathlon anymore, okay? 277 00:13:13,978 --> 00:13:17,025 Just... just take it easy and watch and learn. 278 00:13:17,026 --> 00:13:18,028 Hello. 279 00:13:19,405 --> 00:13:23,203 Hi, hi... we, uh... we need food 280 00:13:23,204 --> 00:13:25,499 and, uh, and shelter. 281 00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:29,717 Uh, we can do hard work. 282 00:13:30,970 --> 00:13:34,642 Uh... harvest? 283 00:13:34,643 --> 00:13:39,361 Um... home improvement. 284 00:13:39,362 --> 00:13:41,824 And odds and ends. 285 00:13:41,825 --> 00:13:44,412 Odds and ends? Fuck that. 286 00:13:44,413 --> 00:13:46,626 What are we offering here? 287 00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:53,138 I think that means, "yes." 288 00:13:53,139 --> 00:13:55,017 Sure, man, I'm not going anywhere... 289 00:13:55,018 --> 00:13:57,731 Come on, I know you had help. 290 00:13:57,732 --> 00:14:00,821 You are far too stupid to have figured this out on your own. 291 00:14:00,822 --> 00:14:03,075 Give me something... anything. 292 00:14:03,076 --> 00:14:05,538 Oh, man. I love chickpeas. 293 00:14:07,417 --> 00:14:09,964 Oh. 294 00:14:09,965 --> 00:14:13,011 How did he... 295 00:14:13,012 --> 00:14:14,639 chickpeas. 296 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:16,769 That is so much better. 297 00:14:16,770 --> 00:14:18,605 I need transcripts of every conversation 298 00:14:18,606 --> 00:14:20,401 Futturman had with himself. 299 00:14:20,402 --> 00:14:22,781 Then I need you to wipe the server, then I need you 300 00:14:22,782 --> 00:14:24,659 to wipe your memory of this conversation. 301 00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,079 And you should do it in that order 302 00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:27,958 or you will be very confused. 303 00:14:27,959 --> 00:14:29,712 Yes, sir, Mr. Saint Jackalope. 304 00:14:34,638 --> 00:14:39,105 Oh, hay... okay, cool. Arigato. 305 00:14:39,106 --> 00:14:43,197 No. You said this was Kansas in the Civil War. 306 00:14:43,198 --> 00:14:46,872 Or Russia during World War I. 307 00:14:48,333 --> 00:14:51,296 I got the war part right. 308 00:14:51,297 --> 00:14:53,593 Ah, shit. 309 00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:06,368 How are you already asleep? 310 00:15:06,369 --> 00:15:08,873 We grew up hard, Josh. 311 00:15:08,874 --> 00:15:12,088 I've slept on stone, steel. 312 00:15:12,089 --> 00:15:14,969 I've slept on fire. 313 00:15:14,970 --> 00:15:17,640 This is nothing. 314 00:15:24,321 --> 00:15:26,491 Just prickly sticks 315 00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:28,789 jabbing me everywhere! 316 00:16:02,815 --> 00:16:05,362 Mmm, mm. 317 00:16:11,290 --> 00:16:12,876 Who's got something? 318 00:16:12,877 --> 00:16:15,005 I've got something, but I don't think it can be them. 319 00:16:15,006 --> 00:16:17,219 Two timelines just momentarily merged. 320 00:16:18,304 --> 00:16:20,934 Right here, a pterodactyl barrel-rolled 321 00:16:20,935 --> 00:16:24,649 into Susan B. Anthony at the Chicago World's Fair in 1893. 322 00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:26,152 How could my fugitives do that? 323 00:16:26,153 --> 00:16:27,363 They didn't. 324 00:16:27,364 --> 00:16:28,866 I think we're looking at Temporal Decay. 325 00:16:28,867 --> 00:16:30,829 It's like a black hole but for time. 326 00:16:30,830 --> 00:16:32,248 And it's getting bigger. 327 00:16:32,249 --> 00:16:35,129 Eventually it will suck every timeline into it. 328 00:16:35,130 --> 00:16:38,135 This is it, the Big Suck. All the evidence is there. 329 00:16:38,136 --> 00:16:41,516 Time overlapping, future and past existing simultaneously, 330 00:16:41,517 --> 00:16:43,145 spacetime collapsing in on itself... 331 00:16:43,146 --> 00:16:45,942 Unless my three rode in on that pterodactyl, 332 00:16:45,943 --> 00:16:47,278 I don't care. 333 00:17:07,904 --> 00:17:09,530 Tiger, what is that technique? 334 00:17:09,531 --> 00:17:10,657 You can't just yank it out of the ground. 335 00:17:10,658 --> 00:17:12,369 You use your trowel, okay? 336 00:17:12,370 --> 00:17:15,209 Four quick scoops, loosen the soil, 337 00:17:15,210 --> 00:17:18,132 then you just let the beet come to you. 338 00:17:20,345 --> 00:17:22,181 Ow! Gah. 339 00:17:22,182 --> 00:17:24,435 Doesn't count, okay? You stole it from my basket. 340 00:17:24,436 --> 00:17:26,439 I am not... I am not a farmer, okay? 341 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:28,861 I'm not meant to work the land. 342 00:17:28,862 --> 00:17:31,157 I'm a fighter, and I need some goddamn action. 343 00:17:31,158 --> 00:17:34,330 Plus, to top it all off, I've been shitting blood. 344 00:17:34,331 --> 00:17:35,917 It's probably just the beets. 345 00:17:35,918 --> 00:17:37,628 I wish it were blood. 346 00:17:37,629 --> 00:17:39,090 Look, I don't get what you're complaining about. 347 00:17:39,091 --> 00:17:41,052 We are doing honest work for honest wages. 348 00:17:41,053 --> 00:17:42,471 Boo! 349 00:17:42,472 --> 00:17:44,058 Excuse me, all right? 350 00:17:44,059 --> 00:17:45,394 For the first time in, like, ever, 351 00:17:45,395 --> 00:17:47,189 we're not being chased by anybody and we're safe. 352 00:17:47,190 --> 00:17:48,358 And I'm good at something. 353 00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:49,778 That's what sucks about this place. 354 00:17:49,779 --> 00:17:51,908 It's so boring, even you're good at it. 355 00:17:52,952 --> 00:17:55,372 Hey, tell me... 356 00:17:55,373 --> 00:17:58,503 just... just tell me again about The DieCathlon. 357 00:17:58,504 --> 00:18:01,217 - Oh, God. Do I have to? - Uh-huh. 358 00:18:03,389 --> 00:18:05,350 You were dominant. Powerful. 359 00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:07,563 I was the best, right? I had trophies. 360 00:18:07,564 --> 00:18:09,317 Yes, Tiger. New trophies every day. 361 00:18:09,318 --> 00:18:11,279 - Mostly horns and teeth. - Mmm... 362 00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:14,327 On Day 27 you did befriend a Hobgoblin named Gerty. 363 00:18:14,328 --> 00:18:16,456 Gerty, eh? I like that. 364 00:18:16,457 --> 00:18:18,878 Then you, uh, stabbed her in the throat once you realized 365 00:18:18,879 --> 00:18:21,007 she was just after your magical juniper berries. 366 00:18:21,008 --> 00:18:23,637 Sounds like I was happy. 367 00:18:23,638 --> 00:18:26,684 Yeah... yeah, I mean, you did smile a lot. 368 00:18:26,685 --> 00:18:29,775 Not sure it was the healthiest form of happiness... 369 00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:33,406 Truth is, no feeling can compare to the pure joy 370 00:18:33,407 --> 00:18:37,373 that you experience when you pull out a Hall of Famer 371 00:18:37,374 --> 00:18:39,836 like this one. Look at this guy! 372 00:18:39,837 --> 00:18:42,591 - Oh, man. - Okay, we're done. 373 00:18:42,592 --> 00:18:45,097 Come on. 374 00:18:45,098 --> 00:18:48,144 You're not the only one who's got a trophy, Tiger! 375 00:18:54,616 --> 00:18:56,202 I'm with her, Josh. 376 00:18:56,203 --> 00:18:58,665 You've got to keep your eyes on the prize. 377 00:18:58,666 --> 00:19:01,254 Remember, that prize is home. 378 00:19:01,255 --> 00:19:03,174 Yeah, I know, but getting the TTD from her 379 00:19:03,175 --> 00:19:05,345 is, like, impossible and this is really easy. 380 00:19:05,346 --> 00:19:06,974 If you cannot take it, 381 00:19:06,975 --> 00:19:09,186 you'll have to convince her to leave this time 382 00:19:09,187 --> 00:19:10,815 and bring you to me. 383 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:12,986 You're right... 384 00:19:12,987 --> 00:19:14,990 I don't know, I just didn't expect this horrible place 385 00:19:14,991 --> 00:19:17,829 to contain such unexpected beauty. 386 00:20:04,757 --> 00:20:07,594 This is unbearable. 387 00:20:07,595 --> 00:20:10,977 I know. Thousands of people dying. 388 00:20:10,978 --> 00:20:13,439 World War I was the worst. 389 00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:15,610 No, that part's white noise. 390 00:20:15,611 --> 00:20:18,826 I'm talking about this hay. 391 00:20:18,827 --> 00:20:20,872 Soldiers are getting slaughtered in trenches 392 00:20:20,873 --> 00:20:23,084 and you're complaining about hay? 393 00:20:23,085 --> 00:20:25,130 Trenches, huh? Mm. 394 00:20:25,131 --> 00:20:28,386 Sewers with a view. God, I love me a trench. 395 00:20:28,387 --> 00:20:30,140 Josh, an opening! 396 00:20:30,141 --> 00:20:32,729 Convince her to leave this foul time. 397 00:20:32,730 --> 00:20:34,398 Oh, no. 398 00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:37,029 No, you don't. Not this kind of trench. 399 00:20:37,030 --> 00:20:38,323 I mean, to be honest, we should be 400 00:20:38,324 --> 00:20:40,660 as far away from here right now as possible. 401 00:20:40,661 --> 00:20:42,623 I'm talking about killing fields, just... 402 00:20:42,624 --> 00:20:45,922 just festering with disease and rot. 403 00:20:45,923 --> 00:20:47,967 And if you weren't mowed down by machine gunfire, 404 00:20:47,968 --> 00:20:50,388 then the poison gas would just fill your lungs 405 00:20:50,389 --> 00:20:52,936 and kill you from the inside out. 406 00:20:52,937 --> 00:20:56,860 - Your face would just melt off. - Then what happened? 407 00:20:56,861 --> 00:21:00,868 Uh... tanks and horses 408 00:21:00,869 --> 00:21:02,621 sharing the same battlefields. 409 00:21:02,622 --> 00:21:07,130 Heavy machinery being pulled by horses... 410 00:21:07,131 --> 00:21:10,972 and then there were, like, men screaming and... 411 00:21:10,973 --> 00:21:13,184 and horses whinnying. 412 00:21:13,185 --> 00:21:15,397 Really leaning into the "horse" of it all, here. 413 00:21:15,398 --> 00:21:17,777 Well, full disclosure, I'm kind of basing most of this 414 00:21:17,778 --> 00:21:20,615 on the movie War Horse. 415 00:21:20,616 --> 00:21:24,331 My mom took me to see it, and I did not enjoy it. 416 00:21:24,332 --> 00:21:25,751 So how did this war end? 417 00:21:25,752 --> 00:21:27,714 Horribly. Everyone died. 418 00:21:27,715 --> 00:21:29,425 I mean, they had to make up new rules of combat 419 00:21:29,426 --> 00:21:31,930 to make sure it never happened again. 420 00:21:31,931 --> 00:21:33,851 Sounds like the war to end all wars. 421 00:21:33,852 --> 00:21:35,186 Look, judging by the sound of that artillery, 422 00:21:35,187 --> 00:21:36,689 it's getting closer day by day. 423 00:21:36,690 --> 00:21:38,401 We need to get that TTD and get the... 424 00:21:38,402 --> 00:21:40,280 Ah, I can't take this anymore. 425 00:21:40,281 --> 00:21:42,534 - Give me your shirt. - What, no? 426 00:21:42,535 --> 00:21:44,163 It's the only thing between me and the weevils! 427 00:23:06,369 --> 00:23:07,748 Ah... 428 00:23:09,542 --> 00:23:11,087 Not here. 429 00:23:13,429 --> 00:23:17,080 Let's say we take that big comfy bed for a spin. 430 00:23:33,090 --> 00:23:36,470 Oh, my sweet Dasha. 431 00:23:36,471 --> 00:23:38,642 What have they done to you? 432 00:23:57,221 --> 00:23:59,308 Let them watch. 433 00:25:41,679 --> 00:25:43,183 Yeah... 434 00:25:44,812 --> 00:25:48,692 I didn't understand a word of that, but... 435 00:25:48,693 --> 00:25:50,949 you want me to eat that ass again? 436 00:25:52,869 --> 00:25:54,747 Da. 437 00:26:11,573 --> 00:26:13,492 ♪ This is the muffle song ♪ 438 00:26:13,493 --> 00:26:15,663 ♪ Let's all sing the muffle song ♪ 439 00:26:15,664 --> 00:26:18,460 ♪ This is the muffle song ♪ Tiger, come on. 440 00:26:18,461 --> 00:26:20,841 We gotta do it together or it doesn't work. 441 00:26:45,098 --> 00:26:47,644 All right, good times. I'll see you tonight. 442 00:27:09,940 --> 00:27:14,572 It's Wolf-Hart. He set her humanity aflame. 443 00:27:18,331 --> 00:27:19,917 Let's move. 444 00:27:19,918 --> 00:27:21,253 This is no longer a capture mission. 445 00:27:21,254 --> 00:27:22,547 It's a kill mission. 446 00:27:22,548 --> 00:27:25,428 Bring me the killing machine. 447 00:27:25,429 --> 00:27:29,018 In Ancient Sparta, there is the legend of the 300. 448 00:27:29,019 --> 00:27:31,106 We synthesized time-jacked DNA 449 00:27:31,107 --> 00:27:33,820 from 299 of these elite warriors. 450 00:27:33,821 --> 00:27:35,782 One of them, the hunchback, he was kind of creepy 451 00:27:35,783 --> 00:27:37,410 and couldn't fight, we didn't bother with, 452 00:27:37,411 --> 00:27:38,788 but the others, 453 00:27:38,789 --> 00:27:41,334 we suited with our most advanced human exo-armor 454 00:27:41,335 --> 00:27:43,297 to create the ultimate warrior. 455 00:27:43,298 --> 00:27:45,468 When all human options have failed, 456 00:27:45,469 --> 00:27:48,224 we bring in the killing machine. 457 00:28:27,344 --> 00:28:29,473 I wanna fight in your war to end all wars. 458 00:28:52,477 --> 00:28:54,105 I just woke up with a note pinned to my shirt 459 00:28:54,106 --> 00:28:56,861 saying I'm supposed to give you this data cube. 460 00:28:56,862 --> 00:28:58,488 Now, the note's written in my handwriting 461 00:28:58,489 --> 00:29:00,492 and I don't remember writing any of it, so I... 462 00:29:00,493 --> 00:29:01,913 Shut up! Go away. 463 00:29:01,914 --> 00:29:03,373 Wipe this from your memory, too. 464 00:29:03,374 --> 00:29:05,044 Okay... 465 00:29:13,812 --> 00:29:16,274 You did have help... 466 00:29:16,275 --> 00:29:19,824 from exactly whom I thought. 467 00:29:27,381 --> 00:29:28,716 Good news. 468 00:29:28,717 --> 00:29:30,344 We can sleep in the house now, 469 00:29:30,345 --> 00:29:31,638 and, uh, here's your shirt back. 470 00:29:33,852 --> 00:29:36,022 Why is it wet? 471 00:29:36,023 --> 00:29:37,943 Oh, that's mostly Dasha. 472 00:29:37,944 --> 00:29:39,613 Where's Tiger? 473 00:29:44,749 --> 00:29:46,459 I have no idea. 474 00:29:46,460 --> 00:29:48,213 Maybe she's taking a walk or something. 475 00:29:48,214 --> 00:29:50,927 Wait... someone's here. 476 00:30:38,523 --> 00:30:40,692 There's the third one. 477 00:30:40,693 --> 00:30:42,113 I count at least three. 478 00:30:42,114 --> 00:30:44,033 We need to blow this beet stand. 479 00:30:44,034 --> 00:30:45,369 Okay, I've got the TTD. 480 00:30:45,370 --> 00:30:47,248 I bet I can figure out how to get us out of here. 481 00:30:47,249 --> 00:30:48,709 - Right? - Yes, yes. 482 00:30:48,710 --> 00:30:50,420 At long last, my friend. 483 00:30:50,421 --> 00:30:52,884 You asking or telling? It doesn't matter. 484 00:30:55,891 --> 00:30:58,562 It's killing time. 485 00:30:58,563 --> 00:31:00,315 Okay, uh, how do I work this thing? 486 00:31:00,316 --> 00:31:01,651 With your mind. 487 00:31:01,652 --> 00:31:04,115 Picture a square in eight dimensions. 488 00:31:04,116 --> 00:31:05,450 That's step one. 489 00:31:13,384 --> 00:31:14,721 Axe! 490 00:31:20,148 --> 00:31:21,692 Axe! 491 00:31:29,291 --> 00:31:31,795 Axe! 492 00:31:31,796 --> 00:31:34,593 Body spray. 493 00:31:44,529 --> 00:31:48,913 "His curious tongue gently circled, daring, teasing, 494 00:31:48,914 --> 00:31:51,584 "both rhythmic and arrhythmic at the same time, 495 00:31:51,585 --> 00:31:54,048 like American Jazz." 496 00:32:00,478 --> 00:32:03,150 God, I missed this shit. 497 00:32:09,914 --> 00:32:12,167 - Thanks. - Yeah. 498 00:32:12,168 --> 00:32:15,299 Oh, it's gonna be hard to miss this guy. 499 00:32:19,349 --> 00:32:22,187 Oh. 500 00:32:22,188 --> 00:32:25,068 Guess I shouldn't have wasted the ammo on the old man 501 00:32:25,069 --> 00:32:27,281 and the boy, but they laughed at me, Wolf. 502 00:32:27,282 --> 00:32:28,534 They laughed. 503 00:32:31,123 --> 00:32:32,876 Run! 504 00:32:38,220 --> 00:32:39,472 Rotate the tesseract, 505 00:32:39,473 --> 00:32:41,184 but only three quarters. 506 00:32:41,185 --> 00:32:42,854 Now, flatten it. 507 00:32:42,855 --> 00:32:44,941 - Hey. Give me that. - No. 508 00:32:44,942 --> 00:32:47,154 I got it, I'm taking us somewhere safe. 509 00:32:55,296 --> 00:32:57,674 Where are we? 510 00:32:57,675 --> 00:33:01,224 Exactly where we're meant to be. 511 00:33:04,231 --> 00:33:05,649 Don't worry, guys, okay? 512 00:33:05,650 --> 00:33:08,029 We're gonna be very, very safe here. 513 00:33:11,328 --> 00:33:13,917 Uh... maybe safer over here. 514 00:33:21,432 --> 00:33:22,809 Hachi... 515 00:33:22,810 --> 00:33:25,397 If you say, "machi," I'll kill you myself. 516 00:33:31,239 --> 00:33:36,239 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com