1 00:00:06,522 --> 00:00:08,122 Boys, cookies! 2 00:00:08,162 --> 00:00:10,002 All right! - Not that one. 3 00:00:10,042 --> 00:00:12,042 I put Dewey's antibiotics in that one. 4 00:00:12,082 --> 00:00:13,442 Take this one. It's biggest. 5 00:00:15,282 --> 00:00:17,882 Did you put anything in this one? - Of course not. Just take it. 6 00:00:18,802 --> 00:00:20,842 Then take this one 20 minutes later. 7 00:00:54,282 --> 00:00:56,282 There's no doubt about it, we're totally gonna go this year. 8 00:00:56,322 --> 00:00:57,802 Totally. It's not even a question. 9 00:00:57,842 --> 00:00:59,082 What's there to question? - Nothing. 10 00:00:59,122 --> 00:01:00,482 Because we're going. We're totally going. 11 00:01:00,522 --> 00:01:03,522 Totally. - Oh, God, Burning Man again? 12 00:01:03,562 --> 00:01:05,442 Every year it's the same thing 13 00:01:05,922 --> 00:01:07,722 This time we're totally going! 14 00:01:07,762 --> 00:01:09,242 Oh, yeah, totally! 15 00:01:09,322 --> 00:01:11,842 And every year you chicken out with some pathetic excuse. 16 00:01:11,882 --> 00:01:13,722 My personal favorite was last year's 17 00:01:13,802 --> 00:01:16,042 Really bad Slurpee headache." - See? 18 00:01:16,282 --> 00:01:17,882 That is exactly the kind of ignorant talk 19 00:01:18,002 --> 00:01:19,322 I'd expect from someone who doesn't have 20 00:01:19,362 --> 00:01:21,442 any appreciation for what Burning Man is 21 00:01:21,802 --> 00:01:23,282 a week of freedom out in the desert 22 00:01:23,402 --> 00:01:26,162 naked women, getting back to your primal nature 23 00:01:26,202 --> 00:01:27,322 naked women 24 00:01:27,362 --> 00:01:30,562 people doing art, naked women. - Are all the women naked? 25 00:01:31,002 --> 00:01:32,522 That is all you heard, isn't it? 26 00:01:33,642 --> 00:01:34,962 Mom 27 00:01:36,002 --> 00:01:37,762 Dad breakfast 28 00:01:37,802 --> 00:01:39,082 Jamie 29 00:01:39,122 --> 00:01:40,362 Dewey 30 00:01:43,322 --> 00:01:44,682 Dad dinner. 31 00:01:44,882 --> 00:01:46,642 Went to Burning Man. 32 00:01:47,282 --> 00:01:48,202 There. That should get us 33 00:01:48,242 --> 00:01:49,442 till tomorrow. - I can't believe it. 34 00:01:49,482 --> 00:01:52,242 We're really doing it! We're actually going to Burning Man! 35 00:01:52,602 --> 00:01:53,922 Hitchhiking? 36 00:01:53,962 --> 00:01:56,842 Hitchhiking on the highway like hobos? 37 00:01:56,882 --> 00:01:59,162 Thank God your mother undercooked the chicken last night 38 00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:01,482 or who knows when we might have found out about this? 39 00:02:01,562 --> 00:02:03,202 What were you thinking? 40 00:02:03,282 --> 00:02:04,642 Sneaking off in the middle of the night 41 00:02:04,682 --> 00:02:07,162 to go to some overblown keg party in the desert! 42 00:02:07,202 --> 00:02:09,362 That is not what Burning Man is all about. 43 00:02:09,482 --> 00:02:11,802 Burning Man is an incredible, interactive experiment 44 00:02:11,842 --> 00:02:13,522 in human creativity, where you do art 45 00:02:13,562 --> 00:02:15,482 just for art's sake, and you make music 46 00:02:15,522 --> 00:02:17,322 from instruments that came to you in dreams. 47 00:02:17,602 --> 00:02:19,842 It's the one place where you're free to let go and 48 00:02:19,882 --> 00:02:21,362 really see what you're capable of creating 49 00:02:21,402 --> 00:02:23,042 without worrying what anyone else thinks! 50 00:02:23,162 --> 00:02:25,042 That's what Burning Man is all about! 51 00:02:28,522 --> 00:02:30,362 I think she actually might've bought that. 52 00:02:31,042 --> 00:02:33,762 This Burning Person sounds like it's gonna be a lot of fun. 53 00:02:33,802 --> 00:02:35,442 What a great idea, Malcolm. 54 00:02:35,482 --> 00:02:38,082 Yeah. Maybe next year we can take Grandma to Mardi Gras. 55 00:02:38,122 --> 00:02:40,122 You think I enjoy having powers that I can't control? 56 00:02:40,162 --> 00:02:42,242 Believe me, I'd much rather be as stupid as you are. 57 00:02:42,322 --> 00:02:43,882 Don't try sucking up to me now. 58 00:02:44,322 --> 00:02:47,882 I still can't believe Mr. Barnes let you borrow his fancy RV. 59 00:02:47,922 --> 00:02:49,082 This is so classy. 60 00:02:49,122 --> 00:02:51,602 This is like Buckingham Palace on wheels. 61 00:02:51,642 --> 00:02:54,122 He ripped one on the elevator just before the CEO got on 62 00:02:54,162 --> 00:02:55,202 and I took the blame for it. 63 00:02:55,242 --> 00:02:57,082 That's the way things work in the corporate world. 64 00:02:57,122 --> 00:02:58,842 You're unselfish, and it paid off. 65 00:02:59,082 --> 00:03:00,122 Hey, you boys check out 66 00:03:00,162 --> 00:03:01,802 the flat-screen TV back in the bedroom? 67 00:03:02,002 --> 00:03:04,642 And the two-thirds- scale fold-down pool table? 68 00:03:04,682 --> 00:03:06,842 Boy, we're gonna have so much fun in this baby! 69 00:03:07,762 --> 00:03:09,202 Whoa, whoa. What was that? 70 00:03:09,482 --> 00:03:11,082 I just opened an apple juice for Jamie. 71 00:03:11,122 --> 00:03:13,042 And now you can close it back up. 72 00:03:13,082 --> 00:03:14,482 I thought I was clear about this. 73 00:03:14,602 --> 00:03:16,642 The camper is going back without a single stain 74 00:03:16,682 --> 00:03:18,362 smudge, smell or dent. 75 00:03:18,602 --> 00:03:21,682 Yeah, but I really think Jamie.. - D-D-D-D-Dewey, what is the rule? 76 00:03:22,362 --> 00:03:25,562 This one RV is worth three of me. - Okay. 77 00:03:28,402 --> 00:03:29,842 Help me get this grate off. 78 00:03:30,082 --> 00:03:31,722 I'm gonna ditch out when we slow down for a turn. 79 00:03:31,762 --> 00:03:33,642 I am not going to Burning Man with Mom and Dad. 80 00:03:33,682 --> 00:03:35,602 Reese, we're in the middle of the desert. 81 00:03:35,642 --> 00:03:36,762 I know what you're thinking 82 00:03:36,842 --> 00:03:39,082 the roadrunners are too smart to catch and eat. 83 00:03:39,162 --> 00:03:41,162 But the coyotes are idiots. 84 00:03:41,202 --> 00:03:43,482 Look, it-it might not be as embarrassing as we think. 85 00:03:43,522 --> 00:03:45,282 If we move quick, we might be able to sneak off 86 00:03:45,322 --> 00:03:47,482 without anyone knowing that we came to Burning Man with our parents. 87 00:03:47,522 --> 00:03:48,882 We're here! 88 00:04:10,442 --> 00:04:12,082 Hey, neighbors! 89 00:04:12,402 --> 00:04:15,482 I'm gonna do art, too. I brought my paintbrushes. 90 00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:18,122 Okay, let's get moving here. 91 00:04:18,162 --> 00:04:20,202 Reese, Malcolm, I want you guys.. 92 00:04:21,362 --> 00:04:22,242 They're gone. 93 00:04:22,282 --> 00:04:24,362 They shimmied under the RV and took off running. 94 00:04:25,042 --> 00:04:26,722 Well, then I guess it's up to you to help me set up 95 00:04:26,762 --> 00:04:28,602 a protective perimeter around the camper. 96 00:04:28,642 --> 00:04:30,082 We'll need about 40 rocks 97 00:04:30,122 --> 00:04:31,802 at least the size of bowling balls. 98 00:04:32,562 --> 00:04:34,522 I'm sorry, son. You snooze, you lose. 99 00:04:34,562 --> 00:04:36,682 Now, come on, come on, don't let the flies get in. 100 00:04:37,682 --> 00:04:38,922 Look at this place 101 00:04:38,962 --> 00:04:40,202 it's amazing! 102 00:04:41,842 --> 00:04:43,762 That has to be the coolest guy on Earth! 103 00:04:43,802 --> 00:04:45,442 See? I told you everything was gonna be all right 104 00:04:45,482 --> 00:04:46,962 even with Mom and Dad here. 105 00:04:47,002 --> 00:04:48,122 We just need to make sure we look out 106 00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:49,442 for each other.. - Excuse me. - Whoa! 107 00:04:51,202 --> 00:04:52,802 Damn it! I stepped on a cactus. 108 00:04:52,842 --> 00:04:54,122 Can you give me a hand? 109 00:04:55,602 --> 00:04:56,962 Reese? 110 00:05:02,842 --> 00:05:03,962 Hey, buddy? 111 00:05:04,002 --> 00:05:05,522 You know where the topless chicks are? 112 00:05:05,562 --> 00:05:07,122 And I'm not interested in the uggos or blimps 113 00:05:07,162 --> 00:05:08,282 if you know what I'm saying. 114 00:05:09,522 --> 00:05:11,282 Follow me, I'm going that way. 115 00:05:11,802 --> 00:05:13,242 Hey, man, want some Stanley? 116 00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:17,202 First time at Burning Man? - Yeah. 117 00:05:17,242 --> 00:05:18,442 Yeah, I can always tell the newbies. 118 00:05:18,482 --> 00:05:20,242 Hey, you guys, you want a little Stanley? 119 00:05:21,482 --> 00:05:23,162 Don't see there. - What's Stanley? 120 00:05:23,362 --> 00:05:25,282 Oh, Stanley was a buddy of mine. 121 00:05:25,842 --> 00:05:28,242 We've been coming to Burning Man together almost 20 years. 122 00:05:28,282 --> 00:05:29,882 Stanley! 123 00:05:30,922 --> 00:05:33,642 Anyway, he passed on over the winter, and 124 00:05:33,722 --> 00:05:35,562 he always said he wanted his ashes scattered here 125 00:05:35,602 --> 00:05:37,722 kind of as a way of spreading the spirit of Burning Man 126 00:05:37,762 --> 00:05:40,322 to the people and the family he loved. 127 00:05:41,682 --> 00:05:43,082 And you're allowed to do that? 128 00:05:43,522 --> 00:05:45,242 Spray a dead guy on people? 129 00:05:45,482 --> 00:05:47,562 I got suspended for a week for putting a mouse's head 130 00:05:47,602 --> 00:05:48,762 on the end of my pencil. 131 00:05:49,242 --> 00:05:50,522 Burning Man's all about freedom, dude. 132 00:05:50,562 --> 00:05:51,962 You can do whatever you want here. 133 00:05:53,642 --> 00:05:55,122 Whatever I want? 134 00:05:55,482 --> 00:05:57,202 You mean, I could kick this over? 135 00:05:57,762 --> 00:05:59,082 Or break that? 136 00:05:59,122 --> 00:06:02,082 Well, I guess if you really felt you had to. 137 00:06:03,682 --> 00:06:05,602 Doesn't that kind of take the fun out of mindless destruction? 138 00:06:05,642 --> 00:06:07,682 That's what the flaming catapult's for. 139 00:06:11,202 --> 00:06:12,562 Yeah, but the real spirit of Burning Man 140 00:06:12,602 --> 00:06:13,962 isn't about destruction. 141 00:06:14,042 --> 00:06:16,922 It's about creating, participating, contributing. 142 00:06:16,962 --> 00:06:20,082 Building a community that needs you, relies on you. 143 00:06:20,602 --> 00:06:23,522 It's about allowing yourself to become part of the whole 144 00:06:23,882 --> 00:06:26,122 and then coming away from it with more than you brought. 145 00:06:27,002 --> 00:06:28,882 No, there's no feeling like it in the world. 146 00:06:29,242 --> 00:06:31,962 Wow. - Yeah, it's a mind-altering journey, son 147 00:06:33,562 --> 00:06:35,162 if you're willing to take it. 148 00:06:37,202 --> 00:06:40,482 You know what? I think I want some Stanley. 149 00:06:45,242 --> 00:06:48,722 Wow! This stuff is gorgeous. 150 00:06:49,442 --> 00:06:51,122 We really have to get some for the house. 151 00:06:52,082 --> 00:06:53,442 Howdy! 152 00:06:53,642 --> 00:06:55,642 Just getting the old homestead set up. 153 00:06:55,682 --> 00:06:58,722 Best hamburgers and dogs you've ever tasted are on me 154 00:06:58,762 --> 00:07:00,682 when I get this baby fired up, huh? 155 00:07:01,842 --> 00:07:03,242 What's he doing? 156 00:07:03,282 --> 00:07:04,882 It's performance art. 157 00:07:05,762 --> 00:07:09,042 He's skewering the empty banality of the modern suburban dad. 158 00:07:09,082 --> 00:07:11,362 Honey, where'd I put my good basting brush? 159 00:07:13,162 --> 00:07:14,602 Honey? 160 00:07:15,722 --> 00:07:18,082 Honey? - This guy's good. 161 00:07:21,802 --> 00:07:24,202 No one told me there was a looky-loo convention in town. 162 00:07:24,762 --> 00:07:26,642 Dad, do I have to circle the whole thing? 163 00:07:26,682 --> 00:07:28,202 I can't find any more rocks. 164 00:07:28,242 --> 00:07:29,722 Son, look, we might be in the desert 165 00:07:29,762 --> 00:07:31,442 but we are still civilized people 166 00:07:31,482 --> 00:07:33,962 and civilized people put up arbitrary boundaries 167 00:07:34,002 --> 00:07:35,642 that they will fight to the death to protect. 168 00:07:35,682 --> 00:07:37,562 I'm pretty sure we passed some nice-sized rocks 169 00:07:37,602 --> 00:07:39,042 when we turned into the camp. 170 00:07:39,122 --> 00:07:41,242 That's half a mile away! - Don't be silly. 171 00:07:41,402 --> 00:07:42,722 2 miles, easy. 172 00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,242 Here we go! 173 00:07:45,962 --> 00:07:48,122 Hal, this place is so great! 174 00:07:48,442 --> 00:07:50,762 I met the nicest group of gals down by the Porta-Potty. 175 00:07:50,802 --> 00:07:53,722 They call themselves a "tribe," like a group of wild Indians. 176 00:07:53,762 --> 00:07:54,722 Isn't that cute? 177 00:07:54,762 --> 00:07:57,162 They invited me to the hemp-braiding tent later. 178 00:07:57,202 --> 00:07:59,002 What are you using the Porta-Potties for 179 00:07:59,042 --> 00:08:01,122 when we have the world's greatest toilet 180 00:08:01,162 --> 00:08:02,522 10 feet away in the RV? 181 00:08:02,762 --> 00:08:04,602 That thing will suck down a small deer. 182 00:08:07,722 --> 00:08:10,522 Mention free food and they start gathering like flies. 183 00:08:13,322 --> 00:08:15,282 This is great, I'm gonna spend my entire two days 184 00:08:15,322 --> 00:08:16,842 at Burning Man standing in this line. 185 00:08:17,442 --> 00:08:18,762 Hey, man. 186 00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:21,722 You know, the line's much shorter in front of the Shaman's tent. 187 00:08:21,762 --> 00:08:23,482 The what? - Oh, you will love her. 188 00:08:23,522 --> 00:08:25,362 She totally cured my planter's warts. 189 00:08:25,722 --> 00:08:27,122 Thanks, but.. - Come on, man. 190 00:08:27,162 --> 00:08:28,602 You think I'd lead you wrong? 191 00:08:39,042 --> 00:08:40,482 Come this way. 192 00:08:41,322 --> 00:08:42,522 Thank you. 193 00:08:42,682 --> 00:08:44,122 And remember, if you're gonna eat glass 194 00:08:44,162 --> 00:08:46,442 chew at least 10 times before you swallow. 195 00:08:46,482 --> 00:08:48,282 Okay? 196 00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:50,482 Oh, what do we have here? 197 00:08:50,522 --> 00:08:51,562 I stepped on a cactus. 198 00:08:51,602 --> 00:08:53,002 The needle went right through my shoe. 199 00:08:53,042 --> 00:08:54,522 Let's take a look. 200 00:08:55,122 --> 00:08:56,322 It's not a big deal. 201 00:08:56,362 --> 00:08:57,922 I think I just need some disinfectant and a Band-Aid 202 00:08:57,962 --> 00:08:59,362 and I'll be.. 203 00:09:00,602 --> 00:09:01,682 Ma'am? 204 00:09:02,722 --> 00:09:05,482 You've internalized a lot of criticism, haven't you? 205 00:09:06,002 --> 00:09:08,002 Well, I don't know. I guess. 206 00:09:08,042 --> 00:09:09,322 But what does that.. 207 00:09:12,522 --> 00:09:13,922 Okay 208 00:09:14,242 --> 00:09:15,162 here's your problem. 209 00:09:15,202 --> 00:09:17,802 You have an incredible amount of passion in your soul 210 00:09:18,122 --> 00:09:20,002 but you've got to let down the armor 211 00:09:20,042 --> 00:09:21,602 you're using to shield it. 212 00:09:23,042 --> 00:09:24,522 You also need a tetanus shot. 213 00:09:26,922 --> 00:09:28,402 Okay, she's almost as old as my mom 214 00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:29,882 and obviously crazy as a loon. 215 00:09:30,442 --> 00:09:31,962 So, why am I so turned on? 216 00:09:33,882 --> 00:09:36,162 Most Western medicines numb the body. 217 00:09:36,202 --> 00:09:37,362 They silence it. 218 00:09:37,402 --> 00:09:39,162 But the body's an amazing thing, Malcolm 219 00:09:39,202 --> 00:09:41,082 it can tell you what's wrong with it. 220 00:09:42,002 --> 00:09:44,082 All real healing is just listening. 221 00:09:44,122 --> 00:09:46,322 I don't see anything alternative about that. 222 00:09:47,082 --> 00:09:49,322 I just don't see colonizing space as the answer. 223 00:09:49,362 --> 00:09:51,042 I mean, if we can't solve our problems here 224 00:09:51,082 --> 00:09:52,722 what's the point of just exporting them there? 225 00:09:52,762 --> 00:09:55,682 Even Werner Von Braun said that everything science taught him 226 00:09:55,922 --> 00:09:57,642 strengthened his belief in the continuity 227 00:09:57,682 --> 00:09:59,482 of spiritual existence after death. 228 00:09:59,602 --> 00:10:02,722 Okay, I buy that Godzilla came out of the collective purging 229 00:10:02,802 --> 00:10:04,682 of Japanese guilt after World War II 230 00:10:04,722 --> 00:10:06,842 but can you explain to me why the costume had to look so fake? 231 00:10:06,882 --> 00:10:08,242 Well, let's see 232 00:10:08,522 --> 00:10:10,082 first I'd say 233 00:10:10,722 --> 00:10:11,882 the 'Go-Go's' 234 00:10:12,482 --> 00:10:13,882 then 'The Bangles' 235 00:10:13,922 --> 00:10:16,242 'Bananarama' and 'Josie and the Pussycats.' 236 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:18,522 I can't believe it! I hated 'Charlotte's Web,' too! 237 00:10:18,562 --> 00:10:20,642 I just wanted to squash that whiny little spider. 238 00:10:21,202 --> 00:10:22,922 Deep dish. 239 00:10:23,242 --> 00:10:24,722 Chocolate chip. 240 00:10:25,002 --> 00:10:27,002 Oscar the Grouch. - Oscar the Grouch. 241 00:10:29,802 --> 00:10:31,482 Wow. And I thought all that crap 242 00:10:31,522 --> 00:10:33,602 everyone said about love was just to piss me off. 243 00:10:34,602 --> 00:10:36,362 So, you're going to come? - Oh, absolutely. 244 00:10:36,402 --> 00:10:37,722 That sounds like a hoot and a half. 245 00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:39,482 Great. It's by the giant foam tongue. 246 00:10:39,522 --> 00:10:41,642 Just make a left at the guy in the phone booth full of Jell-O. 247 00:10:41,682 --> 00:10:42,842 If you hit the Men's Diaper Brigade 248 00:10:42,882 --> 00:10:45,162 you've gone too far. - See you there. - Okay. 249 00:10:48,762 --> 00:10:50,002 What's this? 250 00:10:50,042 --> 00:10:52,682 The food's all green. - I added a little food color. 251 00:10:52,722 --> 00:10:55,202 It's artistic. I'm being artistic. 252 00:10:55,242 --> 00:10:57,642 Mom's right. I always thought art was just stupid paintings 253 00:10:57,682 --> 00:10:59,762 of old dead guys in drag, but I was wrong. 254 00:10:59,922 --> 00:11:02,762 Art can be doing something, or even undoing something. 255 00:11:03,002 --> 00:11:04,482 Like when I blew up the Muller's mailbox 256 00:11:04,562 --> 00:11:06,042 that was art, and I didn't even know it. 257 00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,882 Green eggs and toast. I do not like green eggs and toast. 258 00:11:08,922 --> 00:11:11,122 Oh, for God's sake, Hal, stretch a little. 259 00:11:11,202 --> 00:11:13,322 We're on vacation. - Why do they have to play Frisbee 260 00:11:13,362 --> 00:11:14,442 so close to the RV? 261 00:11:14,482 --> 00:11:15,722 Can't they have fun with that thing 262 00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:17,602 without constantly throwing it around? 263 00:11:17,642 --> 00:11:20,082 And where's Malcolm? Did he even come home last night? 264 00:11:20,282 --> 00:11:21,442 I gotta tell you, Lois 265 00:11:21,482 --> 00:11:22,962 I really don't think I like this place. 266 00:11:23,602 --> 00:11:25,242 I think I love this place. 267 00:11:27,602 --> 00:11:29,962 No, I'm sure I do. - Good morning. 268 00:11:30,002 --> 00:11:31,322 Did you know 269 00:11:31,362 --> 00:11:33,682 you are the most incredible woman who ever lived? 270 00:11:33,962 --> 00:11:36,642 Well, I knew I was in the top three, but 271 00:11:36,682 --> 00:11:38,402 I guess your vote clinches it. 272 00:11:39,722 --> 00:11:41,802 So, are we going to spend the day together? 273 00:11:42,162 --> 00:11:44,042 I thought we could go check out the Circle of Infinity 274 00:11:44,082 --> 00:11:46,602 and then.. - Oh, I have a ton of re-birthing ceremonies to do today. 275 00:11:46,642 --> 00:11:48,682 But we can get together later. How about that? 276 00:11:48,842 --> 00:11:50,322 Sure, that sounds great. 277 00:11:51,522 --> 00:11:52,802 What's the matter? 278 00:11:53,042 --> 00:11:54,882 Nothing. I'm happy. 279 00:11:55,122 --> 00:11:57,802 Really, really happy. - No, there's something the matter 280 00:11:57,842 --> 00:12:00,282 but I just can't pin it down. - Nothing's wrong. 281 00:12:00,562 --> 00:12:02,082 You go and do your re-birthing whatevers 282 00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:03,082 and we'll get together later. 283 00:12:03,122 --> 00:12:05,522 Contempt. That's it. - What are you talking about? 284 00:12:05,562 --> 00:12:07,322 You have contempt for me and for what I do. 285 00:12:07,362 --> 00:12:09,082 No, no, not at all. 286 00:12:09,442 --> 00:12:11,762 I should really just keep my mouth shut for the next 5 seconds. 287 00:12:12,002 --> 00:12:14,042 4, 3.. 288 00:12:14,082 --> 00:12:15,802 I mean, it is a pretty silly ritual 289 00:12:15,842 --> 00:12:17,802 but I guess I don't see any real harm in it. 290 00:12:18,042 --> 00:12:19,482 You know, I have a lot to do today 291 00:12:19,522 --> 00:12:20,722 and I think you should probably go. 292 00:12:20,842 --> 00:12:22,242 No.. - Good-bye, Malcolm. 293 00:12:32,522 --> 00:12:34,602 This guy's really captured something here. 294 00:12:34,882 --> 00:12:37,442 This piece is as vicious as it is funny. 295 00:12:38,162 --> 00:12:40,082 What are you looking at? 296 00:12:40,122 --> 00:12:42,442 Haven't you ever seen a man sweep his lawn 297 00:12:42,482 --> 00:12:44,242 with a broom before? 298 00:12:46,162 --> 00:12:47,722 Okay, that's enough. I've had it. 299 00:12:47,762 --> 00:12:49,362 Go on, get out of here, you punks. 300 00:12:56,962 --> 00:12:59,402 What the hell is wrong with you people? 301 00:12:59,442 --> 00:13:02,802 Doesn't anybody have respect for personal property anymore? 302 00:13:03,602 --> 00:13:05,522 You can think about that for a few days 303 00:13:05,562 --> 00:13:07,402 until I give this back to you. 304 00:13:08,722 --> 00:13:10,722 Yeah! - No! 305 00:13:16,642 --> 00:13:19,042 I bet orphanages just don't take family trips 306 00:13:19,522 --> 00:13:21,322 or kids raised by animals. 307 00:13:21,882 --> 00:13:23,642 How come they get all the breaks? 308 00:13:28,682 --> 00:13:30,642 Okay, Lois, you can open your eyes now. 309 00:13:34,082 --> 00:13:36,762 Oh, my gosh. This is fantastic. 310 00:13:36,962 --> 00:13:39,402 Oh, I wish there was a JC Penney nearby. 311 00:13:39,442 --> 00:13:41,122 I'd love to get wallets of this. 312 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,122 Who's stupid idea was it to come here, anyway? 313 00:13:44,162 --> 00:13:45,562 I'm with you, Malcolm. 314 00:13:45,602 --> 00:13:46,842 We don't belong here. 315 00:13:47,082 --> 00:13:49,762 This place is full of freaks and weirdoes. 316 00:13:50,042 --> 00:13:52,042 And now your mother and Jamie are out there with them 317 00:13:52,082 --> 00:13:53,682 doing God knows what. 318 00:13:54,882 --> 00:13:57,122 You're going to be okay, Malcolm, because you are just like me. 319 00:13:58,122 --> 00:13:59,042 I am? - Well, sure. 320 00:13:59,082 --> 00:14:01,602 They say we're stubborn, they say we're closed-minded 321 00:14:01,642 --> 00:14:03,562 but I say there's nothing closed-minded 322 00:14:03,602 --> 00:14:06,482 about shunning ideas that make you scared and uncomfortable. 323 00:14:07,442 --> 00:14:10,282 Yeah. - And who cares if they say we're afraid of life? 324 00:14:10,322 --> 00:14:12,202 Life is scary. 325 00:14:12,322 --> 00:14:14,722 Life is things eating things. 326 00:14:14,922 --> 00:14:18,122 Well, I say let everyone out there go ahead and eat each other. 327 00:14:19,362 --> 00:14:21,522 You and I, we're gonna be in here together 328 00:14:21,682 --> 00:14:23,202 safe and sound. 329 00:14:27,562 --> 00:14:28,962 I've been a total idiot. 330 00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:31,002 I have to get over myself. - Where are you going? 331 00:14:31,522 --> 00:14:34,362 Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you, young man! 332 00:14:42,722 --> 00:14:46,282 Get off my property! 333 00:14:54,442 --> 00:14:55,962 What? What did I do? 334 00:14:58,042 --> 00:15:00,082 Come with us. - Wait. I want my lawyer. 335 00:15:00,122 --> 00:15:01,522 He's the naked guy in the buffalo head. 336 00:15:01,562 --> 00:15:03,682 It's okay, Reese, you're not in any trouble. 337 00:15:03,722 --> 00:15:05,042 We want you to be the torchbearer 338 00:15:05,082 --> 00:15:06,802 for the big Burning Man ceremony. 339 00:15:06,882 --> 00:15:08,562 You do? - Absolutely. 340 00:15:08,602 --> 00:15:10,282 I can't think of anyone who has embraced 341 00:15:10,322 --> 00:15:12,922 and embodied the spirit of the festival more than you have. 342 00:15:12,962 --> 00:15:14,122 Really? 343 00:15:14,162 --> 00:15:15,442 Wow. 344 00:15:16,522 --> 00:15:18,802 Hey, don't say anything to my lawyer, okay? 345 00:15:18,842 --> 00:15:20,242 I don't want to have to give him a piece of this. 346 00:15:22,042 --> 00:15:25,482 Open yourselves to the energy of re-birthing. 347 00:15:25,522 --> 00:15:27,642 The old self dies. 348 00:15:27,682 --> 00:15:31,682 A new self is born. The old self dies. 349 00:15:31,842 --> 00:15:35,802 A new self is born. The old self dies. 350 00:15:35,962 --> 00:15:37,882 A new self is born. 351 00:15:37,922 --> 00:15:40,042 The old self dies. 352 00:15:40,162 --> 00:15:41,922 A new self is born. 353 00:15:42,162 --> 00:15:43,362 I can do this. 354 00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:44,642 I can be open-minded. 355 00:15:44,762 --> 00:15:45,962 So it's a little weird. 356 00:15:46,122 --> 00:15:47,762 Most rituals are a little weird, right? 357 00:15:50,802 --> 00:15:52,802 He really needs a fresh start. 358 00:15:53,042 --> 00:15:55,042 He made a lot of mistakes his first two days. 359 00:15:56,762 --> 00:15:58,762 Okay, so it's totally insane. 360 00:15:59,042 --> 00:16:00,922 I don't care. I'm doing it. 361 00:16:01,202 --> 00:16:05,082 A new self is born. The old self dies. 362 00:16:05,122 --> 00:16:06,842 A new self is born. 363 00:16:13,082 --> 00:16:15,842 I got to tell you, man, you've been fantastic. 364 00:16:15,882 --> 00:16:17,202 Thanks. 365 00:16:18,282 --> 00:16:20,082 What's this for? - What's it for? 366 00:16:20,202 --> 00:16:22,322 It's to set him on fire. 367 00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:24,322 Burning Man! - What? 368 00:16:24,362 --> 00:16:25,842 That's how we end Burning Man, man 369 00:16:25,882 --> 00:16:28,002 by burning the man. - But it can't end. 370 00:16:28,082 --> 00:16:29,322 I don't want it to. 371 00:16:29,602 --> 00:16:32,322 For the first time in my life, I feel real, like I belong. 372 00:16:32,402 --> 00:16:34,962 We've all been there, man, but it still has to end. 373 00:16:35,002 --> 00:16:37,722 But why? - That's just the way it is. 374 00:16:37,762 --> 00:16:39,442 Look, it's cool if you don't want to, man. 375 00:16:39,682 --> 00:16:41,802 Get back! Everyone just stay back! 376 00:16:41,842 --> 00:16:44,282 No one's burning Burning Man! - Burning Man! Burning Man! 377 00:16:56,362 --> 00:16:57,522 Malcolm? 378 00:16:57,962 --> 00:16:59,402 What are you doing here? - I did it. 379 00:16:59,922 --> 00:17:00,962 I actually did it. 380 00:17:01,002 --> 00:17:03,322 You re-birthed yourself for me? 381 00:17:03,362 --> 00:17:06,922 No. Well, yeah, originally, but something happened in there. 382 00:17:07,042 --> 00:17:08,402 I mean, I was able to open my mind 383 00:17:08,442 --> 00:17:10,362 and be accepting of something I didn't believe in. 384 00:17:10,642 --> 00:17:12,162 I've never been able to do that before. 385 00:17:12,482 --> 00:17:15,082 It's amazing. I actually feel like I've been reborn. 386 00:17:15,122 --> 00:17:17,882 It feels fantastic, and it's all thanks to you. 387 00:17:17,922 --> 00:17:19,322 Oh, Malcolm. 388 00:17:20,002 --> 00:17:21,522 We can never see each other again. 389 00:17:22,602 --> 00:17:23,642 What? - This can never work. 390 00:17:23,722 --> 00:17:25,242 You're just way too malleable. 391 00:17:25,282 --> 00:17:27,322 The condescending cynic I could deal with, but this 392 00:17:27,362 --> 00:17:29,842 I don't want you doing things just because I want you to do them. 393 00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:32,002 Then-Then I won't, if that's what you want. 394 00:17:32,962 --> 00:17:34,642 Crap. - I'm sorry, Malcolm. 395 00:17:34,682 --> 00:17:37,122 Life is a journey that you have to take on your own. 396 00:17:37,242 --> 00:17:39,042 I've tried my own journey. It sucks. 397 00:17:39,162 --> 00:17:41,282 Please, please, please, just take me with you. 398 00:17:41,362 --> 00:17:43,642 I-I don't take up a lot of space. - You have to go now. 399 00:17:43,682 --> 00:17:44,722 But, hey.. 400 00:17:46,722 --> 00:17:47,682 Great. 401 00:17:47,722 --> 00:17:50,042 Who knew this life could be even crappier than the last one? 402 00:17:50,802 --> 00:17:53,042 Burning Man! Burning Man! - No! Stay back! 403 00:17:53,082 --> 00:17:54,762 Stay back! I mean it! 404 00:18:00,682 --> 00:18:02,322 Get in the van, Reese. We're going home. 405 00:18:02,362 --> 00:18:03,482 Dad, you gotta help me. 406 00:18:03,522 --> 00:18:05,282 They want me to burn Burning Man. 407 00:18:05,322 --> 00:18:07,362 Oh, for crying out loud, just torch the bastard 408 00:18:07,402 --> 00:18:09,242 and we're out of here. - I'm ready. 409 00:18:09,282 --> 00:18:11,562 I finally got your precious floor mats clean. 410 00:18:11,602 --> 00:18:13,482 Let's get the hell out of here. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 411 00:18:13,762 --> 00:18:16,482 Are you insane? You're not going into my beautiful van 412 00:18:16,522 --> 00:18:18,162 looking like that. - Hey! 413 00:18:18,362 --> 00:18:20,202 Here come the Trumpet Strumpets. 414 00:18:20,242 --> 00:18:23,962 Let's burn the man! - Yeah! 415 00:18:25,762 --> 00:18:29,002 Burning Man! Burning Man! Burning Man! Burning Man! - No. 416 00:18:29,042 --> 00:18:31,082 Please, no! - Burning Man! Burning Man! 417 00:18:31,122 --> 00:18:32,722 No! No! - Burning Man! Burning Man! 418 00:18:32,762 --> 00:18:34,202 Burning Man can't end! 419 00:18:34,642 --> 00:18:36,162 I won't let it! 420 00:18:52,202 --> 00:18:55,682 Burning van! Burning van! Burning van! Burning van! 421 00:18:55,722 --> 00:18:59,602 Burning van! Burning van! Burning van! Burning van! 422 00:18:59,642 --> 00:19:03,002 Burning van! Burning van! Burning van! 423 00:19:08,042 --> 00:19:10,442 I still can't believe how awesome Burning Man was. 424 00:19:10,762 --> 00:19:12,642 Next year we're totally going back, right? 425 00:19:13,122 --> 00:19:14,482 Totally. 426 00:19:15,202 --> 00:19:18,282 Okay, so Burning Man didn't turn out as great as I thought it would. 427 00:19:18,322 --> 00:19:20,802 But I think I'll get over it a lot faster than Dad will. 428 00:19:20,842 --> 00:19:22,722 His boss really loved that RV. 429 00:19:23,042 --> 00:19:24,522 Oh, don't wait up. 430 00:19:24,562 --> 00:19:26,762 I probably won't be home until dawn again. 431 00:19:26,802 --> 00:19:29,282 Tonight I'm digging him a new septic tank. 432 00:19:29,762 --> 00:19:30,682 Come on, Dewey. 433 00:19:30,722 --> 00:19:33,122 First we gotta relocate the pet cemetery.