1
00:00:02,219 --> 00:00:05,092
I'm toast. Mom found out
I'm the one that broke the oven.

2
00:00:05,179 --> 00:00:06,745
Oh, man, you're going down.

3
00:00:06,832 --> 00:00:08,747
I know. So, if you want me
to take the fall

4
00:00:08,834 --> 00:00:10,488
for anything,
it's five bucks a pop.

5
00:00:10,575 --> 00:00:12,055
I'm in! The hole
in the bathroom wall.

6
00:00:12,142 --> 00:00:13,448
Me, too!
Dad's camera.

7
00:00:13,535 --> 00:00:15,145
All right, Dewey,
you're off the hook.

8
00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:17,060
You two!

9
00:00:20,107 --> 00:00:23,023
You were supposed to wait
till I got my money.

10
00:00:23,719 --> 00:00:26,809
♪ Yes, no, maybe ♪

11
00:00:26,896 --> 00:00:29,594
♪ I don't know ♪

12
00:00:29,681 --> 00:00:32,467
♪ Can you repeat the question? ♪

13
00:00:32,554 --> 00:00:35,165
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪

14
00:00:35,252 --> 00:00:37,646
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪

15
00:00:37,733 --> 00:00:40,127
♪ You're not the boss of me
now ♪

16
00:00:40,214 --> 00:00:42,129
♪ And you're not so big... ♪

17
00:00:42,216 --> 00:00:44,522
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪

18
00:00:44,609 --> 00:00:46,568
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪

19
00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:49,310
♪ You're not the boss of me
now ♪

20
00:00:49,397 --> 00:00:51,921
♪ And you're not so big... ♪

21
00:00:52,008 --> 00:00:56,012
♪ Life is unfair. ♪

22
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:03,498
MAN :
...and after the autopsy
of the victim,

23
00:01:03,585 --> 00:01:06,283
the coroner himself
went completely

24
00:01:06,370 --> 00:01:07,763
insane.

25
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:11,027
This is so cool.

26
00:01:11,114 --> 00:01:12,507
This guy started
this death tour,

27
00:01:12,594 --> 00:01:14,248
showing people all the places
in town

28
00:01:14,335 --> 00:01:16,119
where grisly murders
took place.

29
00:01:16,206 --> 00:01:18,208
He padded it
with a couple of suicides,

30
00:01:18,295 --> 00:01:20,602
but come on, close enough.

31
00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:22,821
Now, coming up on your left,

32
00:01:22,908 --> 00:01:26,303
the site where one of
the most gruesome
multiple murders

33
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:28,479
in the history of
the state took place.

34
00:01:28,566 --> 00:01:30,699
Look, if you dare,

35
00:01:30,786 --> 00:01:33,963
at this house of pure evil.

36
00:01:44,060 --> 00:01:45,801
I can't believe
we've been living here

37
00:01:45,888 --> 00:01:47,194
this whole time, and we didn't
even know about the murders.

38
00:01:47,281 --> 00:01:48,412
REESE:
Man, I always assumed

39
00:01:48,499 --> 00:01:49,674
I'd do the coolest thing
in this house,

40
00:01:49,761 --> 00:01:51,502
but that guy set the bar
pretty high.

41
00:01:51,589 --> 00:01:53,722
Come on,
there were no murders here.

42
00:01:53,809 --> 00:01:55,811
A guy bought a hearse,
and then he realized

43
00:01:55,898 --> 00:01:57,247
he had to cover
his monthly payments,

44
00:01:57,334 --> 00:01:59,815
and so he made up
this phony death tour.

45
00:01:59,902 --> 00:02:00,816
It's the oldest trick
in the book.

46
00:02:00,903 --> 00:02:02,296
Tell 'em, honey.

47
00:02:02,383 --> 00:02:03,601
I got Jamie the cutest
Halloween costume.

48
00:02:03,688 --> 00:02:05,690
He's gonna be a little tiger.

49
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:08,476
Honey?

50
00:02:09,693 --> 00:02:10,913
Oh, my God.

51
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,306
It's true?!

52
00:02:12,393 --> 00:02:14,569
Hal, bad things happen
all the time.

53
00:02:14,656 --> 00:02:16,005
But nothing this bad.

54
00:02:16,092 --> 00:02:18,181
Lois, can I talk to
you for a moment?

55
00:02:19,443 --> 00:02:21,402
:
You knew we were buying
a death house,

56
00:02:21,489 --> 00:02:23,186
and you didn't tell me?!

57
00:02:23,273 --> 00:02:25,667
I didn't tell you because I knew
you'd have this reaction.

58
00:02:25,754 --> 00:02:27,625
Well, of course
I'd have this reaction.

59
00:02:27,712 --> 00:02:29,061
I don't like murder.

60
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:30,846
Maybe that's something
you should know about me.

61
00:02:30,933 --> 00:02:32,239
Hal, it's always
something with you.

62
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:33,936
You passed on that one house

63
00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:35,590
because you thought the
doorbell sounded gay.

64
00:02:35,677 --> 00:02:37,200
You can't have
a perfect house.

65
00:02:37,287 --> 00:02:39,246
It would be nice
to have a murder-less one.

66
00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:40,943
Well, you should
just drop it

67
00:02:41,030 --> 00:02:42,640
because there's nothing
we can do about it.

68
00:02:42,727 --> 00:02:44,381
Death and mold are two things
you can expect to find

69
00:02:44,468 --> 00:02:46,166
in any house, and
we are not moving!

70
00:02:46,253 --> 00:02:47,645
There's mold?!

71
00:02:51,475 --> 00:02:54,913
I cannot believe
they called me in to work.

72
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,568
I requested Halloween
off eight months ago,
and suddenly,

73
00:02:57,655 --> 00:02:59,048
Marybeth becomes
a Wiccan,

74
00:02:59,135 --> 00:03:00,745
so she can take it as
a religious holiday.

75
00:03:00,832 --> 00:03:02,399
There will be
more Halloweens...

76
00:03:02,486 --> 00:03:03,748
barring some tragic event.

77
00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:06,273
But this is the
good one, you know?

78
00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:08,840
There's such a tiny
window where the kids
are still sweet and adorable,

79
00:03:08,927 --> 00:03:10,712
and you can dress them up
however you want.

80
00:03:10,799 --> 00:03:12,409
Every year after that,

81
00:03:12,496 --> 00:03:14,585
Halloween's just another trip
to the police station.

82
00:03:14,672 --> 00:03:16,108
Life is unfair, Lois.

83
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:17,675
And, sometimes,
it's cut horrifically short

84
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:19,155
with no warning whatsoever.

85
00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:20,504
I think if I send Jamie
out with the boys,

86
00:03:20,591 --> 00:03:23,072
I can catch up with them
during my break.

87
00:03:23,159 --> 00:03:25,770
I mean, I'll only be able to do
a couple of houses with them.

88
00:03:25,857 --> 00:03:27,903
Hal, what are you doing?

89
00:03:27,990 --> 00:03:29,861
Oh, it's, uh, it's time
Jamie had a night light.

90
00:03:29,948 --> 00:03:32,603
Why don't you put it
over by his crib?

91
00:03:32,690 --> 00:03:34,692
He wants it here!

92
00:03:36,477 --> 00:03:38,174
It just doesn't
make sense.

93
00:03:38,261 --> 00:03:40,655
Why would you fake being sick
on Halloween?

94
00:03:40,742 --> 00:03:42,526
I'm not faking it.
I feel like crap.

95
00:03:42,613 --> 00:03:44,572
Must've gotten it from
that death tour guy.

96
00:03:44,659 --> 00:03:47,227
I thought his clammy handshake
was just part of the act.

97
00:03:47,314 --> 00:03:49,664
You've got to keep your immune
system in shape, Malcolm.

98
00:03:49,751 --> 00:03:51,056
Every once in a while,

99
00:03:51,143 --> 00:03:52,710
pick some gum off the seat
and chew it.

100
00:03:52,797 --> 00:03:53,972
Ounce of prevention, dude.

101
00:03:54,059 --> 00:03:55,539
All right,
you know the plan.

102
00:03:55,626 --> 00:03:57,280
You two are taking Jamie.

103
00:03:57,367 --> 00:03:59,151
No eggs, no stink bombs,
no matches,

104
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:00,936
no catapults, no Mace.

105
00:04:01,023 --> 00:04:02,329
Fine.

106
00:04:04,505 --> 00:04:06,289
No explosives.

107
00:04:06,376 --> 00:04:07,595
Of course not.

108
00:04:07,682 --> 00:04:10,032
No water balloons,
no spray paint,

109
00:04:10,119 --> 00:04:13,209
no gasoline, no shaving
cream, no toilet paper.

110
00:04:13,296 --> 00:04:14,993
Wouldn't even think of it.

111
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:18,127
No ladder,
no compressor, no soup.

112
00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:19,214
You told her!

113
00:04:19,302 --> 00:04:20,521
-I did not!
-All right.

114
00:04:20,608 --> 00:04:21,826
I know your route.
I will catch up with you

115
00:04:21,913 --> 00:04:23,393
when I take my break,

116
00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:25,917
to see how adorable
and safeJamie is.

117
00:04:26,004 --> 00:04:29,225
So, um, any idea
when that might be?

118
00:04:29,312 --> 00:04:31,053
You don't need to know when.

119
00:04:31,140 --> 00:04:33,447
All you need to know
is if you even think

120
00:04:33,534 --> 00:04:36,101
about doing anything stupid,
I will swoop down

121
00:04:36,188 --> 00:04:38,930
out of the sky and land on you
like a ton of bricks.

122
00:04:39,017 --> 00:04:40,280
So, the usual.

123
00:04:44,806 --> 00:04:46,982
Shouldn't you
be in bed?

124
00:04:47,069 --> 00:04:48,592
I got sick of lying there,

125
00:04:48,679 --> 00:04:50,159
so I thought I'd look
on the Internet

126
00:04:50,246 --> 00:04:51,508
for stuff about the murders.

127
00:04:51,595 --> 00:04:54,163
I got police reports,
crime photos,

128
00:04:54,250 --> 00:04:55,338
newspaper articles...

129
00:04:55,425 --> 00:04:56,731
There's a ton of stuff.

130
00:04:56,818 --> 00:04:57,949
-Really?
-The guy's name was

131
00:04:58,036 --> 00:04:59,386
Gareth Stringer.

132
00:04:59,473 --> 00:05:01,736
Normal guy, Scout master,
everybody loved him.

133
00:05:01,823 --> 00:05:03,477
So, one day, out of nowhere,

134
00:05:03,564 --> 00:05:05,392
he comes home from work
and murders his entire family.

135
00:05:06,436 --> 00:05:07,872
They say he lived here

136
00:05:07,959 --> 00:05:09,396
with five headless bodies
for a week

137
00:05:09,483 --> 00:05:11,485
before he finally
killed himself.

138
00:05:11,572 --> 00:05:13,487
For a whole week, huh?

139
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:15,706
That's where the
wife's body was found.

140
00:05:15,793 --> 00:05:17,882
He put all the tongues
in a pile right there.

141
00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:22,365
So I guess
that must have been skin wall.

142
00:05:22,452 --> 00:05:24,454
And that was hair corner.

143
00:05:24,541 --> 00:05:25,803
Over there were...

144
00:05:25,890 --> 00:05:28,415
finger puppets?!

145
00:05:28,502 --> 00:05:30,634
Oh, finger puppets.

146
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:33,855
Wow, the really freaky stuff
happened in the kitchen.

147
00:05:33,942 --> 00:05:35,900
Oh, and in the bathroom
and the bedrooms, too.

148
00:05:35,987 --> 00:05:38,163
Malcolm, is there any place
in this house

149
00:05:38,250 --> 00:05:39,556
where bloody pieces

150
00:05:39,643 --> 00:05:41,471
of dismembered bodies
weren't found?

151
00:05:41,558 --> 00:05:42,690
Well...

152
00:05:42,777 --> 00:05:44,126
Yes.

153
00:05:44,213 --> 00:05:45,867
Right there.

154
00:05:45,954 --> 00:05:47,608
Right here?

155
00:05:47,695 --> 00:05:48,870
That's where they all begged
for mercy.

156
00:05:50,088 --> 00:05:51,307
Hmm.

157
00:05:52,917 --> 00:05:54,745
Thank you.

158
00:05:54,832 --> 00:05:56,530
So, Craig, I
understand the bandana

159
00:05:56,617 --> 00:05:58,488
and the eye patch, but why
would a pirate have blood

160
00:05:58,575 --> 00:05:59,924
dripping out of his mouth?

161
00:06:00,011 --> 00:06:01,665
Oh, I tried holding a dagger
in my teeth.

162
00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:03,841
I'll tell you,
those pirates are a lot tougher

163
00:06:03,928 --> 00:06:06,061
than they're depicted
in the media.

164
00:06:06,148 --> 00:06:07,889
Finally, break time.

165
00:06:07,976 --> 00:06:11,022
I'm gonna go do a little
trick-or-treating with Jamie.

166
00:06:13,547 --> 00:06:15,679
Hey, hey, hey!

167
00:06:15,766 --> 00:06:17,594
What are these?

168
00:06:17,681 --> 00:06:20,075
I must've knocked those
in my pocket accidentally.

169
00:06:20,162 --> 00:06:21,598
No, I saw you put
them in your pocket.

170
00:06:21,685 --> 00:06:23,034
Craig, you saw him,
too, didn't you?

171
00:06:23,121 --> 00:06:25,385
Oh, sorry.
The patch is over my good eye.

172
00:06:25,472 --> 00:06:27,517
Well, I'm already
into my break.

173
00:06:27,604 --> 00:06:29,737
You handle this, Craig,
so I can get going.

174
00:06:29,824 --> 00:06:30,868
Sure, no problem.

175
00:06:30,955 --> 00:06:33,131
Did you just
wink at him?

176
00:06:33,218 --> 00:06:35,003
Oh, you were serious.

177
00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:36,700
Craig, he
committed a crime.

178
00:06:36,787 --> 00:06:38,136
Sure, that's one side of it.

179
00:06:38,223 --> 00:06:39,616
But if he didn't
steal from us,

180
00:06:39,703 --> 00:06:40,922
he'd just be stealing
from somewhere else,

181
00:06:41,009 --> 00:06:42,706
and then we'd be losing
a customer.

182
00:06:42,793 --> 00:06:44,578
Do you want
to be responsible for that?

183
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,494
Margie, will you take
care of this?

184
00:06:47,581 --> 00:06:49,670
What? It's Halloween.

185
00:06:49,757 --> 00:06:50,975
I can't believe this.

186
00:06:51,062 --> 00:06:53,195
We are talking
about the law here!

187
00:06:53,282 --> 00:06:54,849
We have a certain
procedure we follow

188
00:06:54,936 --> 00:06:57,068
when we catch a shoplifter
because that's the law.

189
00:06:57,155 --> 00:06:59,984
It's the only thing that
keeps us from anarchy

190
00:07:00,071 --> 00:07:02,726
and chaos and riots
in the streets.

191
00:07:02,813 --> 00:07:05,425
Oh, move it.

192
00:07:05,512 --> 00:07:06,295
Jackpot tonight.

193
00:07:06,382 --> 00:07:07,905
I know.

194
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:09,690
Five houses in a row
that use the honor system?!

195
00:07:09,777 --> 00:07:11,039
That never happens!

196
00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:12,736
You're our lucky
charm, Jamie.

197
00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:14,869
Now, listen, Jamie,
candy is full of sugar,

198
00:07:14,956 --> 00:07:16,697
and it's terrible for you.

199
00:07:16,784 --> 00:07:18,350
So suck down as much
as you can tonight

200
00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,265
before Mom takes it away
from you.

201
00:07:23,094 --> 00:07:25,401
BOTH:
Trick or treat!

202
00:07:26,271 --> 00:07:27,925
Sweet! No answer!

203
00:07:28,012 --> 00:07:29,274
Now you get
to experience

204
00:07:29,361 --> 00:07:30,537
the true spirit
of Halloween, Jamie.

205
00:07:34,105 --> 00:07:35,716
Ready?

206
00:07:35,803 --> 00:07:37,848
One, two...

207
00:07:37,935 --> 00:07:40,024
Sorry for the delay.
Getting used to my new hip.

208
00:07:40,111 --> 00:07:42,113
Three!

209
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,420
Oh, no, you don't!

210
00:07:47,423 --> 00:07:48,598
Run!

211
00:08:37,429 --> 00:08:40,563
Damn it, Dewey!

212
00:08:40,650 --> 00:08:44,349
CHILDREN:
Trick or treat!

213
00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:46,351
Trick or treat.

214
00:08:46,438 --> 00:08:48,832
Oh! Ugh, an axe in the head?

215
00:08:48,919 --> 00:08:50,138
Do you think that's funny?

216
00:08:50,225 --> 00:08:51,531
If you had a real ax
in your head,

217
00:08:51,618 --> 00:08:52,923
you wouldn't be laughing.

218
00:08:53,010 --> 00:08:54,664
Except if you had an involuntary
muscle spasm.

219
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,013
Does that sound
like a good time?

220
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:57,232
I got this.

221
00:08:57,319 --> 00:08:58,407
Nice costumes.

222
00:08:58,494 --> 00:09:01,062
Thank you!
Happy Halloween!

223
00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:06,850
Dad, are you gonna be okay
handing out candy?

224
00:09:06,937 --> 00:09:09,244
Of course.

225
00:09:13,944 --> 00:09:15,859
Because I should really try
to get some rest.

226
00:09:15,946 --> 00:09:17,295
Sure.

227
00:09:28,916 --> 00:09:30,657
Dad?

228
00:09:30,744 --> 00:09:32,920
I just wanted to make sure
you were safe, Malcolm.

229
00:09:33,007 --> 00:09:35,052
Okay.

230
00:09:35,139 --> 00:09:37,577
Do you feel safe?

231
00:09:39,230 --> 00:09:41,058
Dad, I know the murders
were sick and creepy,

232
00:09:41,145 --> 00:09:42,886
but they happened
20 years ago.

233
00:09:42,973 --> 00:09:44,366
And they don't bother you
at all?

234
00:09:44,453 --> 00:09:45,628
No.

235
00:09:45,715 --> 00:09:46,934
I mean, the
murderer's dead

236
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:48,675
so it's not like
he's coming back.

237
00:09:48,762 --> 00:09:49,937
Right.

238
00:09:51,416 --> 00:09:53,941
Right, I mean,
that would be... crazy.

239
00:09:54,028 --> 00:09:57,988
Dad, you don't believe
in ghosts, do you?

240
00:09:58,075 --> 00:09:59,903
-Malcolm, please.
-Do you?

241
00:09:59,990 --> 00:10:02,297
Do you mean do I believe
in dead people

242
00:10:02,384 --> 00:10:04,908
floating around,
saying, "Ooooh!"

243
00:10:04,995 --> 00:10:07,128
Of course not.

244
00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:08,259
But, I mean, an energy,

245
00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:09,739
a life force,

246
00:10:09,826 --> 00:10:11,698
a soul that, upon death,
separates from the body

247
00:10:11,785 --> 00:10:13,830
and inhabits another plane,
crying out to the living

248
00:10:13,917 --> 00:10:16,137
in a horrific wail
of unbearable pain?

249
00:10:16,224 --> 00:10:17,704
-Oh, absolutely.
-Dad...

250
00:10:17,791 --> 00:10:20,097
You, yourself, told me
that string theory says

251
00:10:20,184 --> 00:10:21,795
there are 11 different
dimensions

252
00:10:21,882 --> 00:10:23,666
occupying the same space.

253
00:10:23,753 --> 00:10:25,799
-So?
-So, who's to say

254
00:10:25,886 --> 00:10:28,192
we can't be affected
by things we don't see?

255
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:30,412
What science calls wormholes is

256
00:10:30,499 --> 00:10:33,197
actually matter and energy,
a life force

257
00:10:33,284 --> 00:10:36,331
mixed together in the cosmos.
Don't you see that?

258
00:10:36,418 --> 00:10:39,377
All of which points to one
stubborn, undeniable fact:

259
00:10:39,464 --> 00:10:42,206
that we are living
in a known portal for evil.

260
00:10:42,293 --> 00:10:44,165
And now that we know it,
and it knows we know it,

261
00:10:44,252 --> 00:10:45,601
of course it would
come back to kill us!

262
00:10:45,688 --> 00:10:47,342
And of course it would
come back tonight!

263
00:10:48,343 --> 00:10:50,040
You don't have much to say

264
00:10:50,127 --> 00:10:51,912
when your science comes back
at you, do you?

265
00:10:59,006 --> 00:11:00,268
Honey?

266
00:11:03,314 --> 00:11:04,576
Reese?

267
00:11:06,361 --> 00:11:07,797
Dewey?

268
00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:12,019
Burglar?

269
00:11:38,393 --> 00:11:40,525
Was that or was that not
the sound of someone

270
00:11:40,612 --> 00:11:43,006
looking for his head?!

271
00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:55,932
But you said you'd send
a patrol car 20 minutes ago!

272
00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:58,021
Low priority?!

273
00:11:58,108 --> 00:12:00,458
It's still against the law
to steal, isn't it?

274
00:12:00,545 --> 00:12:03,287
Fine, fine. We'll be here.

275
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:07,988
Unbelievable.

276
00:12:08,075 --> 00:12:10,947
I get one break
from 7:00 to 7:20.

277
00:12:11,034 --> 00:12:12,775
That break is now over!

278
00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:15,691
Instead of spending it
with my adorable
little two-year-old son,

279
00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:16,953
I spend it with you!

280
00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:18,781
Lady, I have six warrants
for my arrest

281
00:12:18,868 --> 00:12:20,652
and I'm supposed
to feel sorry for you?

282
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,393
Lois,

283
00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:23,917
I've been thinking
about it.

284
00:12:24,004 --> 00:12:25,440
I just want you
to know I'm sorry.

285
00:12:25,527 --> 00:12:27,616
I believe in you
and what you're doing here.

286
00:12:27,703 --> 00:12:29,139
You're doing
the right thing.

287
00:12:29,226 --> 00:12:30,488
Are you drunk?

288
00:12:30,575 --> 00:12:32,447
"Chilty as garged."

289
00:12:32,534 --> 00:12:33,970
Aren't you on the clock?

290
00:12:34,057 --> 00:12:36,233
But it's a party,
and they invited me,

291
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:39,236
knowing full well that
being wanted is my kryptonite.

292
00:12:39,323 --> 00:12:41,151
Party? So they're all drinking
out there?

293
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:43,066
WOMAN : Attention, Lucky Aide shoppers.

294
00:12:43,153 --> 00:12:46,156
Who's gonna come up here and
kiss me right now, damn it?

295
00:12:46,243 --> 00:12:48,985
Oh, my God!
No one cares about the rules!

296
00:12:49,072 --> 00:12:52,032
No one cares about lawbreakers!

297
00:12:52,119 --> 00:12:54,295
Fine! Why am I the only sap?

298
00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:57,777
Since it's complete anarchy,
I am taking my meal break early.

299
00:12:57,864 --> 00:13:00,257
That's right.
I'm overlapping with Joan!

300
00:13:01,650 --> 00:13:02,738
Look at that!

301
00:13:02,825 --> 00:13:04,740
I didn't even line it up right.

302
00:13:08,265 --> 00:13:09,876
So, do I get to go now?

303
00:13:09,963 --> 00:13:12,008
You think you've got some place
more fun than this?

304
00:13:12,095 --> 00:13:13,793
Go if you want.

305
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,230
But a bunch of chips and dip
are about to get "damaged,"

306
00:13:16,317 --> 00:13:18,841
if you know what I mean.

307
00:13:18,928 --> 00:13:20,800
We're gonna eat them.

308
00:13:22,671 --> 00:13:25,021
You know, I think Halloween
really agrees with Jamie.

309
00:13:25,108 --> 00:13:26,414
He's standing up
straighter.

310
00:13:26,501 --> 00:13:28,590
And he didn't try
to pee on that dog.

311
00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:33,073
Is that the old guy
from the egging?

312
00:13:34,726 --> 00:13:36,032
No, that guy had glasses.

313
00:13:36,119 --> 00:13:37,817
No, the first egging.

314
00:13:37,904 --> 00:13:39,906
Heh. Oh, yeah.

315
00:13:43,692 --> 00:13:45,389
I think he's chasing us.

316
00:13:45,476 --> 00:13:47,348
Yeah, I guess he is.

317
00:13:49,741 --> 00:13:51,569
We should... try to get away.

318
00:13:51,656 --> 00:13:53,484
Yeah, I guess we have no choice.

319
00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:01,492
Whew! That was close.

320
00:14:25,429 --> 00:14:26,735
Here you go.

321
00:14:26,822 --> 00:14:28,519
Some hot tea.

322
00:14:28,606 --> 00:14:29,738
Are you warm enough?

323
00:14:29,825 --> 00:14:30,957
I can turn on
the defroster.

324
00:14:31,044 --> 00:14:32,306
I'm good, Dad.

325
00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:33,698
I just want to make sure
you're comfortable.

326
00:14:33,785 --> 00:14:35,309
Well, you could have
let me stay in the house.

327
00:14:35,396 --> 00:14:37,398
No, no.

328
00:14:37,485 --> 00:14:39,835
We're safe out here.

329
00:14:45,449 --> 00:14:47,234
Isn't this nice?

330
00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:49,497
Tell me what's going
on in your life.

331
00:14:49,584 --> 00:14:51,194
Got a special girl?

332
00:14:51,281 --> 00:14:52,239
KIDS:
Trick or treat!

333
00:14:52,326 --> 00:14:53,675
Oh, hey.

334
00:14:53,762 --> 00:14:55,416
We're over here!

335
00:14:55,503 --> 00:14:57,113
Got candy in the car!

336
00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:59,724
Kids love
this holiday.

337
00:14:59,811 --> 00:15:01,161
If they only knew.

338
00:15:01,248 --> 00:15:02,684
Oh, there you are.

339
00:15:02,771 --> 00:15:04,816
There you go.

340
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,515
Here you go.
And here's--

341
00:15:07,602 --> 00:15:09,996
Would you mind
lifting up your mask?

342
00:15:11,345 --> 00:15:14,130
Great! Just checking.

343
00:15:15,653 --> 00:15:16,654
Thank you.

344
00:15:16,741 --> 00:15:18,352
Good night.

345
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:19,570
God, I hate
when they want

346
00:15:19,657 --> 00:15:20,789
to talk
about your costumes.

347
00:15:20,876 --> 00:15:21,921
They know
what we're here for.

348
00:15:22,008 --> 00:15:23,183
Just pay up,
so we can go.

349
00:15:27,187 --> 00:15:28,623
Hey, look at that!

350
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:29,798
The old guy's
still after us.

351
00:15:31,234 --> 00:15:32,235
You gotta admire it.

352
00:15:32,322 --> 00:15:33,628
I hope when I'm his age,

353
00:15:33,715 --> 00:15:35,195
I still have enough hate
to do what he's doing.

354
00:15:35,282 --> 00:15:37,197
Oh, there's my little tiger!

355
00:15:37,284 --> 00:15:39,677
You are so adorable.

356
00:15:39,764 --> 00:15:42,767
If you boys got him involved
in anything bad, I will...

357
00:15:42,854 --> 00:15:45,683
Mom, relax. We've just been
very busy getting candy.

358
00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:47,207
I'm sorry.
I'm just so frazzled.

359
00:15:47,294 --> 00:15:48,904
I almost didn't make it.

360
00:15:48,991 --> 00:15:50,210
I wasted my whole break
sitting with some shoplifter

361
00:15:50,297 --> 00:15:51,689
and no one else

362
00:15:51,776 --> 00:15:53,126
even considered coming to help.

363
00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:54,475
I mean,
can you believe that?!

364
00:15:54,562 --> 00:15:55,998
I'm the one who suffers

365
00:15:56,085 --> 00:15:57,391
and they're the ones
who were breaking all the rules.

366
00:15:57,478 --> 00:15:59,175
You know, this one time,
I accidentally accepted

367
00:15:59,262 --> 00:16:02,178
a Canadian quarter, and they
took it out of my paycheck,

368
00:16:02,265 --> 00:16:04,093
based on that day's
exchange rate.

369
00:16:04,180 --> 00:16:05,790
Yeah, so...

370
00:16:05,877 --> 00:16:06,791
And, you know that when
they deposited that quarter,

371
00:16:06,878 --> 00:16:07,575
the rate was way,
way lower.

372
00:16:07,662 --> 00:16:08,880
Did I complain?

373
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:10,491
No, because I'm a team player.

374
00:16:10,578 --> 00:16:12,101
Mom! We've saved you
the best stretch of houses.

375
00:16:12,188 --> 00:16:13,189
They're right around
that corner.

376
00:16:13,276 --> 00:16:14,277
Really?

377
00:16:14,364 --> 00:16:15,626
Thank you.

378
00:16:15,713 --> 00:16:16,671
Let's go, sweetie.

379
00:16:18,325 --> 00:16:20,327
Who is that guy?

380
00:16:27,812 --> 00:16:29,466
Dad.

381
00:16:29,553 --> 00:16:30,859
I'm awake!

382
00:16:30,946 --> 00:16:32,513
What are you doing?
Get in the car.

383
00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:33,644
It's okay.
I have proof

384
00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:34,689
the murders never
happened here.

385
00:16:37,126 --> 00:16:38,780
Some of the police reports
didn't seem right,

386
00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:40,608
so I went to the City
Planning Office Web site.

387
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:43,393
Some time after the murders,
they split up a double lot

388
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:45,308
down the street, and that
changed all the addresses.

389
00:16:45,395 --> 00:16:46,353
Look.

390
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:47,702
That's the zoning map.

391
00:16:47,789 --> 00:16:49,312
The murders weren't here.

392
00:16:49,399 --> 00:16:51,749
All these articles
are about the house next door.

393
00:16:51,836 --> 00:16:53,403
Well, look at that.

394
00:16:53,490 --> 00:16:54,926
Ha! That sucker!

395
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,016
Do you know how much
he paid for that house?

396
00:16:57,103 --> 00:16:58,582
Have fun in hell, Peterson!

397
00:16:58,669 --> 00:17:00,410
Let me see what
he got himself into.

398
00:17:00,497 --> 00:17:01,890
Uh, no, no, no.

399
00:17:01,977 --> 00:17:03,413
The pictures are really
graphic, you shouldn't...

400
00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:05,198
Wait a minute.

401
00:17:05,285 --> 00:17:07,374
That's our wallpaper and...

402
00:17:07,461 --> 00:17:09,463
that's the counter.

403
00:17:09,550 --> 00:17:11,073
Malcolm, their house
doesn't look like this.

404
00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:13,944
This is our house.

405
00:17:15,077 --> 00:17:16,686
What is going on here?!

406
00:17:16,773 --> 00:17:19,080
Fine! I made it up because
I'm sick of your insanity!

407
00:17:19,167 --> 00:17:21,344
I dummied up a phony Web page
to calm you down.

408
00:17:21,431 --> 00:17:23,259
So you were gonna let me
think that I was safe?

409
00:17:23,346 --> 00:17:25,435
I wasn't going to sit in the car
with you all night! I'm sick!

410
00:17:25,521 --> 00:17:27,046
I was protecting you!

411
00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:28,612
From what, Dad?!

412
00:17:28,699 --> 00:17:30,353
From ghosts?!

413
00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:32,660
Well, I say bring them on.

414
00:17:32,747 --> 00:17:34,096
:
No... no...

415
00:17:34,183 --> 00:17:35,532
I hereby summon
all ghosts and goblins.

416
00:17:35,619 --> 00:17:37,186
No, no, no, no.

417
00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:38,970
Come phantoms and specters
from the gates of Hell,

418
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,929
thou art hereby invited.

419
00:17:41,016 --> 00:17:42,452
He's kidding!

420
00:17:42,539 --> 00:17:44,019
That's the kind of language
they respond to.

421
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:45,934
I challenge ye
to prove me wrong.

422
00:17:46,021 --> 00:17:48,110
Go ahead, rip the skin
from our bones

423
00:17:48,197 --> 00:17:49,894
and feast on our innards.

424
00:17:49,981 --> 00:17:52,375
We are lambs
for your slaughter.

425
00:17:52,462 --> 00:17:53,768
Malcolm!

426
00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:57,424
Swallow this house
into the bowels of Hell!

427
00:17:59,382 --> 00:18:02,385
KIDS:
Trick or treat!

428
00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:08,696
Run! Run from this place
and never return!

429
00:18:11,394 --> 00:18:13,788
:
That guy was good.

430
00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:17,096
ALL:
Mm-hmm.

431
00:18:18,836 --> 00:18:20,664
Hey, you're right.

432
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:23,276
The candy you steal off other
kids really does taste better.

433
00:18:23,363 --> 00:18:25,147
I'm telling you.
It's the fear.

434
00:18:26,801 --> 00:18:28,716
Trick!

435
00:18:28,803 --> 00:18:30,152
Come on.
Admit it, geezer.

436
00:18:30,239 --> 00:18:32,111
You're not gonna catch us.

437
00:18:32,198 --> 00:18:35,331
You're just too old and
too slow. Let's go, Dewey.

438
00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:40,815
Wow, look at that.

439
00:18:40,902 --> 00:18:42,904
Could it be
any more perfect?

440
00:18:48,953 --> 00:18:49,998
I'm stuck.

441
00:18:50,085 --> 00:18:51,391
Me, too.

442
00:18:57,788 --> 00:18:59,964
Boy, call me a prude,
but these pictures

443
00:19:00,051 --> 00:19:03,316
of Mrs. Keyes giving birth
are not as sexy as I thought.

444
00:19:03,403 --> 00:19:05,753
Well, that one's not bad.

445
00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:07,276
Craig, I want to get
some pictures of Jamie

446
00:19:07,363 --> 00:19:08,886
in his costume, so why don't you
give me a roll...

447
00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:11,498
Hey, Lois! I didn't expect you
back so soon.

448
00:19:11,585 --> 00:19:15,371
Oh, nice! So now we're invading
our customers' privacy.

449
00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:16,807
Why don't you just open up

450
00:19:16,894 --> 00:19:18,157
the pharmacy files
and see what's there?

451
00:19:18,244 --> 00:19:19,506
Been there, done that.

452
00:19:19,593 --> 00:19:21,464
FYI, I wouldn't
get too chummy

453
00:19:21,551 --> 00:19:23,031
with Mr. or Mrs. Sanders

454
00:19:23,118 --> 00:19:25,120
:
for four to six weeks.

455
00:19:25,207 --> 00:19:26,121
Excuse me, ma'am.
Can I have a word with you?

456
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:27,688
Well, I'm glad to see

457
00:19:27,775 --> 00:19:29,690
you finally found the time
to show up, Officer,

458
00:19:29,777 --> 00:19:31,431
but our shoplifter is long gone.

459
00:19:31,518 --> 00:19:32,997
I'm not here
about a shoplifter.

460
00:19:33,084 --> 00:19:34,042
That's her!

461
00:19:34,129 --> 00:19:35,913
Mommy!

462
00:19:37,001 --> 00:19:39,743
-Oh, Allison, are you okay?
-Yes.

463
00:19:39,830 --> 00:19:41,397
Hands behind your back, ma'am.

464
00:19:41,484 --> 00:19:43,573
What? This is wrong.

465
00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:44,661
You're making a mistake.

466
00:19:44,748 --> 00:19:45,923
Don't worry, Lois.

467
00:19:46,010 --> 00:19:47,186
If you need
a character witness

468
00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:49,013
at your trial,
you got me.

469
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:51,146
Uh-oh.

470
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,240
Have you boys learned
your lesson yet?

471
00:19:58,327 --> 00:20:00,547
Ha! You stupid old man!
I'll never learn my lesson.

472
00:20:06,161 --> 00:20:09,033
I just want you
to know I'm sorry.

473
00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:10,470
A lot of things
were said here

474
00:20:10,557 --> 00:20:12,428
and I know it got out of hand.

475
00:20:12,515 --> 00:20:14,909
I don't want you
to take this personally.

476
00:20:14,996 --> 00:20:16,302
It's okay.

477
00:20:16,389 --> 00:20:17,651
I was out of line, too.

478
00:20:17,738 --> 00:20:20,610
I wasn't talking to you.

479
00:20:20,697 --> 00:20:23,439
Anyway, Gareth,
you should know...

480
00:20:23,526 --> 00:20:25,485
-Dad...
-Malcolm, let me work with him.

481
00:20:25,572 --> 00:20:27,138
No!

482
00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:28,618
Dad, I know you're afraid,

483
00:20:28,705 --> 00:20:30,446
but you've gotta work
through your fear.

484
00:20:30,533 --> 00:20:33,057
Because it leads to this,
and this is insanity.

485
00:20:33,144 --> 00:20:35,756
I mean, okay, we live in
a universe that we can't control

486
00:20:35,843 --> 00:20:38,976
or understand and that can be
frightening sometimes.

487
00:20:39,063 --> 00:20:40,587
I have fears, too.

488
00:20:40,674 --> 00:20:41,762
But the only way we can
get through our lives

489
00:20:41,849 --> 00:20:43,503
is by tamping down
those fears.

490
00:20:43,590 --> 00:20:46,027
Because if we don't try
to explain things rationally,

491
00:20:46,114 --> 00:20:47,855
the world stops
making any sense at all.

492
00:20:52,555 --> 00:20:54,731
Like that moan?
We have to believe

493
00:20:54,818 --> 00:20:56,385
there's a perfectly logical
explanation for it.

494
00:20:56,472 --> 00:20:57,560
We have to.

495
00:20:59,867 --> 00:21:00,868
Or that.

496
00:21:02,478 --> 00:21:03,914
It could mean whatever
we want it to mean.

497
00:21:04,001 --> 00:21:05,133
The important thing is...

498
00:21:12,401 --> 00:21:14,229
Oh...

499
00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:17,406
MALCOLM:
That was Jamie, wasn't it?

500
00:21:17,493 --> 00:21:20,453
It sure was.
You okay, buddy?

501
00:21:58,926 --> 00:22:01,320
Captioned by Post Haste Digital