1 00:00:02,360 --> 00:00:03,527 Jess. 2 00:00:03,595 --> 00:00:04,795 Yeah. 3 00:00:04,863 --> 00:00:05,930 Can I ask you something? 4 00:00:05,997 --> 00:00:07,164 You want my help? 5 00:00:07,232 --> 00:00:09,266 Sure. 6 00:00:09,334 --> 00:00:11,135 You consider me a sexy man, correct? 7 00:00:11,203 --> 00:00:13,604 I don't know how to answer that question. - Okay, look, 8 00:00:13,672 --> 00:00:15,239 I'm meeting a girl for drinks tonight, 9 00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:17,248 and I'm probably going to bring her back here for sex. 10 00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:19,412 I have to get to school 'cause it's Astronomy Day 11 00:00:19,460 --> 00:00:20,960 and I'm dressing up like Galileo 12 00:00:21,029 --> 00:00:23,064 - so I have to put on my beard. - I get that, 13 00:00:23,131 --> 00:00:25,866 but as a lady, where in the room do I look sexiest? 14 00:00:25,934 --> 00:00:29,703 You know, like, like where am I best on display-- here? 15 00:00:32,309 --> 00:00:37,313 Here or... here? 16 00:00:37,381 --> 00:00:38,614 Hey, what is going on...? 17 00:00:38,682 --> 00:00:40,149 Um, Schmidt wants to know 18 00:00:40,217 --> 00:00:42,585 where in his room he looks the sexiest. 19 00:00:42,652 --> 00:00:43,853 Well, it's a big room. 20 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:44,987 What are your choices? 21 00:00:45,055 --> 00:00:46,155 Okay, I'm glad you asked. 22 00:00:46,223 --> 00:00:48,891 All right, here. 23 00:00:48,959 --> 00:00:49,658 Okay. 24 00:00:52,008 --> 00:00:53,642 Here... 25 00:00:53,709 --> 00:00:56,342 or here, you know, maybe just reading a book or... 26 00:00:56,412 --> 00:00:57,740 That's a lot of options. 27 00:00:57,796 --> 00:00:59,463 - Could you do 'em again really fast? - You want to see 'em again? 28 00:00:59,516 --> 00:01:01,317 - Please. - Okay, here, 29 00:01:01,884 --> 00:01:03,652 here, 30 00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:05,488 here. 31 00:01:05,555 --> 00:01:08,090 - Wait, what was the first one again? - Yeah. 32 00:01:08,158 --> 00:01:10,693 Okay, I get it, all laugh at Schmidt, great. 33 00:01:10,761 --> 00:01:13,896 Here, here... 34 00:01:13,964 --> 00:01:16,999 ♪ Hey, girl ♪ 35 00:01:17,067 --> 00:01:19,068 ♪ What you doing? ♪ 36 00:01:19,136 --> 00:01:22,104 ♪ Hey, girl ♪ 37 00:01:22,172 --> 00:01:25,141 ♪ Where you going? ♪ 38 00:01:25,208 --> 00:01:27,510 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 39 00:01:27,577 --> 00:01:29,245 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 40 00:01:29,312 --> 00:01:31,580 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ ♪ It's Jess. ♪ 41 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:35,352 Sync & corrections by Alice WEBDL by ConstB www.addic7ed.com 42 00:01:39,923 --> 00:01:41,123 He flew in late last night. 43 00:01:41,191 --> 00:01:42,458 We took him straight to the bar. 44 00:01:42,526 --> 00:01:43,959 Took a bunch of shots, got drunk, 45 00:01:44,027 --> 00:01:45,594 screamed "I love America," 46 00:01:45,662 --> 00:01:47,429 now he's happily passed out. 47 00:01:48,497 --> 00:01:50,632 - Let's let him sleep. - Guess I'm not the new kid anymore. 48 00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:52,635 - Just one of the guys. - You're still the new kid. 49 00:01:52,702 --> 00:01:54,904 - Winston lived here before Coach did. - So Coach said 50 00:01:54,971 --> 00:01:56,172 that they used to play basketball 51 00:01:56,239 --> 00:01:57,540 together in college, 52 00:01:57,607 --> 00:01:59,575 but then Winston went pro? 53 00:01:59,643 --> 00:02:01,977 In Latvia, okay, he went, went pro in Latvia. 54 00:02:02,045 --> 00:02:04,346 It's a big difference. Well, the team logo 55 00:02:04,414 --> 00:02:06,982 is a fig, just a, just one single fig. 56 00:02:07,050 --> 00:02:09,118 Oh, you're jealous-- that's so cute. 57 00:02:09,186 --> 00:02:11,586 Of Winston? No, no, no, I'm not, I'm not jealous of Winston. 58 00:02:11,654 --> 00:02:12,454 Okay, it's been two years. 59 00:02:12,522 --> 00:02:14,323 He's gonna have to recognize. 60 00:02:14,391 --> 00:02:16,091 I'm a lot flyer now. Want to see me flex my base? 61 00:02:16,159 --> 00:02:17,326 No, no, no, no, no, no. 62 00:02:17,394 --> 00:02:18,094 Put your shirt on. 63 00:02:18,162 --> 00:02:19,929 - Let me flex my base, man. - Put your shirt on. 64 00:02:19,996 --> 00:02:21,063 - Ba-boom. - It's the morning. 65 00:02:21,131 --> 00:02:22,698 He's going to love it. 66 00:02:22,766 --> 00:02:24,500 Jess, what are you doing? 67 00:02:24,568 --> 00:02:25,801 What is, what is she doing? 68 00:02:31,408 --> 00:02:33,509 Who, w-what, what, what, who...? 69 00:02:33,577 --> 00:02:34,410 I'm Jess. 70 00:02:34,477 --> 00:02:36,512 ♪ I'm Je... ♪ 71 00:02:36,580 --> 00:02:38,614 What's happening? 72 00:02:38,682 --> 00:02:40,683 Why are you doing that?! 73 00:02:40,750 --> 00:02:42,751 ♪ ...ess. ♪ 74 00:02:42,819 --> 00:02:44,854 I can't believe you didn't tell me he was hungover. 75 00:02:44,921 --> 00:02:46,956 I totally told you he was hungover. 76 00:02:47,023 --> 00:02:49,358 I said he was drunk at the bar and now he's passed out. 77 00:02:49,426 --> 00:02:50,826 Hi, Winston. 78 00:02:50,894 --> 00:02:53,662 Hey, I apologize for what happened before. 79 00:02:53,730 --> 00:02:55,231 Not cool, bad call. 80 00:02:55,298 --> 00:02:59,101 I've been talking to the guys about boundaries, so 81 00:02:59,169 --> 00:03:00,269 I totally get it. 82 00:03:00,337 --> 00:03:02,137 Perfectly fine, no problem. 83 00:03:02,705 --> 00:03:04,874 Do you have a tank top I could borrow? 84 00:03:04,941 --> 00:03:06,542 You look like you're about my size. 85 00:03:06,610 --> 00:03:08,210 It's just that I'm really low on clothes 86 00:03:08,278 --> 00:03:10,112 right now 'cause I broke up with my boyfriend. 87 00:03:10,180 --> 00:03:12,882 Oh, God. I caught him cheating, and I just, like, grabbed 88 00:03:12,949 --> 00:03:14,383 - whatever I could and... - Jess, you know what? 89 00:03:14,451 --> 00:03:15,551 I'll let you check my lost and found. 90 00:03:15,619 --> 00:03:16,852 It's where I keep all the stuff that girls 91 00:03:16,920 --> 00:03:19,255 leave behind in my room after we fo'nicate. 92 00:03:19,322 --> 00:03:20,756 Got sizes 93 00:03:20,824 --> 00:03:22,324 zero through ten. 94 00:03:22,392 --> 00:03:24,560 What have you done to me, Nick? 95 00:03:24,628 --> 00:03:26,829 I am so happy you're back. 96 00:03:28,732 --> 00:03:31,400 You have made love to a lot of forgetful women. 97 00:03:31,468 --> 00:03:33,102 Oh, man, look at these. 98 00:03:33,169 --> 00:03:34,069 Wow. 99 00:03:34,137 --> 00:03:35,371 Oh, look at that. 100 00:03:35,438 --> 00:03:36,639 Rosh Hashanah, 101 00:03:36,706 --> 00:03:38,307 '06. 102 00:03:38,375 --> 00:03:40,843 Yeah, nothing orthodox about what we did that night. 103 00:03:40,911 --> 00:03:42,511 Winston seems nice. 104 00:03:42,579 --> 00:03:44,046 Did he say anything to you about the room? 105 00:03:44,114 --> 00:03:45,681 - What room? - The big room. 106 00:03:45,749 --> 00:03:47,216 I kind of took it from him when he left. 107 00:03:47,284 --> 00:03:48,684 I used to be in the small room. 108 00:03:50,487 --> 00:03:51,820 This happened in the small room. 109 00:03:52,822 --> 00:03:54,590 Twice. 110 00:03:54,658 --> 00:03:57,026 Never going back there again, Jess. 111 00:03:57,093 --> 00:03:59,228 He's never going to give you that room back. 112 00:03:59,296 --> 00:04:00,596 Come on, man, it's Schmidt. 113 00:04:00,664 --> 00:04:02,298 You know, they have a saying in Latvia: 114 00:04:02,365 --> 00:04:05,401 That guy is so stupid, 115 00:04:05,468 --> 00:04:07,836 we could easily take things away from him. 116 00:04:07,904 --> 00:04:09,638 - That's a saying? - Yeah, it is. 117 00:04:14,144 --> 00:04:15,511 - What do you think? - Jess, 118 00:04:15,578 --> 00:04:16,712 I've been telling you this for weeks, 119 00:04:16,780 --> 00:04:19,648 but you got to call Spencer and you got to get your stuff back 120 00:04:19,716 --> 00:04:21,016 unless, you know, 121 00:04:21,084 --> 00:04:22,818 unless you're scared. 122 00:04:22,886 --> 00:04:24,420 No, I am not scared. 123 00:04:24,487 --> 00:04:26,221 It's just complicated. 124 00:04:27,624 --> 00:04:30,492 That stuff was, that stuff was ours 125 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:31,527 and the house was... 126 00:04:31,594 --> 00:04:34,797 Jess, look, it's a ball. 127 00:04:34,864 --> 00:04:38,701 Oh, a little b-ball, huh? 128 00:04:38,768 --> 00:04:40,002 I'm actually pretty good. 129 00:04:40,070 --> 00:04:42,438 I used to play with my mom. 130 00:04:42,505 --> 00:04:45,207 ♪ Defense, defense, watch out for the defense ♪ 131 00:04:45,275 --> 00:04:46,442 ♪ Sneaky, sneaky, wah-wah. ♪ 132 00:04:48,011 --> 00:04:49,712 - You get used to her. - Hey, Schmidt. 133 00:04:55,719 --> 00:04:56,885 Oh. 134 00:04:59,723 --> 00:05:01,056 My bad. 135 00:05:05,916 --> 00:05:07,550 I'm sorry, you guys. 136 00:05:07,618 --> 00:05:09,552 That was my TV, Jess. 137 00:05:09,620 --> 00:05:10,653 It's kind of all he had. 138 00:05:10,721 --> 00:05:11,988 I'll get you a new one. 139 00:05:12,055 --> 00:05:13,289 I just can't afford it right now. 140 00:05:13,357 --> 00:05:15,424 If you don't mind me asking, what's the plan? 141 00:05:15,492 --> 00:05:16,425 You don't know me like that, 142 00:05:16,493 --> 00:05:17,593 but I need a TV. 143 00:05:17,661 --> 00:05:18,794 Do you have a TV at Spencer's? 144 00:05:18,862 --> 00:05:20,858 Yeah, I do, it's just really big 145 00:05:20,889 --> 00:05:22,156 and thin and bright. 146 00:05:22,223 --> 00:05:23,490 - Go get it. - Go get it. 147 00:05:23,558 --> 00:05:25,859 No, I can't call Spencer, I haven't talked to him 148 00:05:25,927 --> 00:05:27,828 since he cheated on me with that ho. 149 00:05:27,896 --> 00:05:31,832 Actually, that's not fair-- she might be a really nice ho. 150 00:05:31,900 --> 00:05:33,167 I just don't want to get in a big fight 151 00:05:33,234 --> 00:05:35,336 with Spencer. I want to be friends with him eventually. 152 00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:37,304 Why do you want to be friends with your ex? 153 00:05:37,372 --> 00:05:39,273 I don't want to be friends with Caroline, 154 00:05:39,341 --> 00:05:41,308 and all she did was rip me open and tear out my heart 155 00:05:41,376 --> 00:05:43,777 with her perfect, perfect hands. 156 00:05:45,146 --> 00:05:46,280 He has a power over me. 157 00:05:46,348 --> 00:05:47,348 It's like he's 158 00:05:47,415 --> 00:05:49,116 a wizard and I'm his mage. 159 00:05:49,184 --> 00:05:50,184 I think it's his hair. 160 00:05:50,251 --> 00:05:51,385 He has this, like, 161 00:05:51,453 --> 00:05:52,853 really beautiful hair, and whenever I see it, 162 00:05:52,921 --> 00:05:54,054 I get the whoo-whoos. 163 00:05:54,122 --> 00:05:55,589 Oh, my God, 164 00:05:55,657 --> 00:05:57,658 - I hate my life. - All right, guys-- Jess, 165 00:05:57,726 --> 00:06:01,895 look, Jess, I know. 166 00:06:02,163 --> 00:06:03,097 Closure. 167 00:06:04,332 --> 00:06:05,833 Ouch. 168 00:06:06,487 --> 00:06:07,621 Am I right? 169 00:06:07,713 --> 00:06:09,347 I don't know at all what you're saying right now. 170 00:06:09,415 --> 00:06:11,015 Okay, Jess, think about it. 171 00:06:11,083 --> 00:06:11,950 Schmidt, it's not that complicated. 172 00:06:12,017 --> 00:06:13,318 Jess, just get the TV back. 173 00:06:13,385 --> 00:06:14,786 - I need a TV. - It's important. 174 00:06:14,854 --> 00:06:16,588 It's a television. 175 00:06:16,655 --> 00:06:19,257 It's what brings all of-- just get us the TV! 176 00:06:19,325 --> 00:06:20,592 Okay, it's not a big deal. 177 00:06:20,659 --> 00:06:22,227 I'll do it, I'll call Spencer 178 00:06:22,294 --> 00:06:24,729 and I will talk to him 179 00:06:24,797 --> 00:06:27,899 and I will talk to him, 180 00:06:27,967 --> 00:06:30,001 so yay. 181 00:06:30,069 --> 00:06:32,070 Yay. 182 00:06:44,917 --> 00:06:46,784 Hi, Spencer. 183 00:06:53,526 --> 00:06:56,995 Hi, Jess-Jess. 184 00:06:58,164 --> 00:06:59,631 Wow, I missed this place. 185 00:06:59,698 --> 00:07:01,065 Mmm, mmm. 186 00:07:01,133 --> 00:07:03,067 How's your yogurt thing, Schmidt? 187 00:07:03,135 --> 00:07:04,903 Oh, the parfait? 188 00:07:04,970 --> 00:07:06,771 - It's parfait. - Don't. 189 00:07:06,839 --> 00:07:09,807 Oh, hello, you look beautiful today and smart. 190 00:07:09,875 --> 00:07:11,409 Stop talking to me, Schmidt. 191 00:07:11,477 --> 00:07:13,077 So you're making all the calls now, Schmidt. 192 00:07:13,145 --> 00:07:15,647 Sure. This must mean you are the top dog. 193 00:07:15,714 --> 00:07:19,017 - Yeah? - Absolutely. 194 00:07:19,084 --> 00:07:20,451 You know, I'm glad you guys think that 195 00:07:20,519 --> 00:07:22,854 because, you know, 196 00:07:22,922 --> 00:07:24,722 - I think that, too. - 100%. 197 00:07:24,790 --> 00:07:26,191 I mean, when I moved out, obviously 198 00:07:26,258 --> 00:07:27,926 there was a power vacuum. 199 00:07:27,993 --> 00:07:29,994 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah, I needed a leader. 200 00:07:30,062 --> 00:07:31,696 I didn't know which end was up. 201 00:07:31,764 --> 00:07:34,032 No, Nick's a bottom-- you know what I mean. 202 00:07:34,099 --> 00:07:35,300 Absolutely. 203 00:07:35,367 --> 00:07:36,801 Say, Winston, do all 204 00:07:36,869 --> 00:07:38,937 top dogs need the biggest room 205 00:07:39,004 --> 00:07:40,071 or, I don't know, is that 206 00:07:40,139 --> 00:07:41,339 kind of cheesy, is it a little overkill? 207 00:07:41,407 --> 00:07:42,607 No, no, no, no, but I definitely see 208 00:07:42,675 --> 00:07:44,242 what you're saying, though, definitely. 209 00:07:44,310 --> 00:07:46,144 Um, every top dog is different, 210 00:07:46,212 --> 00:07:47,612 every top dog is different. 211 00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:50,782 Hey, Schmidt, what, uh, kind of top dog are you? 212 00:07:51,849 --> 00:07:52,984 The kind with the big room. 213 00:07:55,187 --> 00:07:56,921 I'm so glad we're talking. 214 00:07:56,989 --> 00:07:59,157 Last time I saw you, you were so mad. 215 00:07:59,225 --> 00:08:00,825 - How is, um...? - Rochelle. 216 00:08:00,893 --> 00:08:03,394 Rochelle-- fancy name. 217 00:08:03,462 --> 00:08:04,529 - She's great. - Rochelle-- 218 00:08:04,597 --> 00:08:06,431 - like a mermaid. - Yeah. 219 00:08:06,498 --> 00:08:08,466 Hello, I'm Rochelle. 220 00:08:08,534 --> 00:08:10,368 I eat fish. 221 00:08:10,436 --> 00:08:11,836 Yeah, we have a lot in common. 222 00:08:11,904 --> 00:08:13,504 Obviously we both love bikes. 223 00:08:13,572 --> 00:08:15,640 I love bikes. 224 00:08:15,708 --> 00:08:17,709 Not enough. 225 00:08:17,776 --> 00:08:20,878 Um, Spencer, I need my stuff back-- 226 00:08:20,946 --> 00:08:22,313 my TV and all my winter clothes... 227 00:08:22,381 --> 00:08:23,915 - Yeah, of course. - ...and my plants. 228 00:08:23,983 --> 00:08:25,883 I would have brought it today, but I rode my bike here, 229 00:08:25,951 --> 00:08:28,286 - you know, without the basket. - Okay, 230 00:08:28,354 --> 00:08:30,253 well, when would be a good time for me to come... 231 00:08:30,254 --> 00:08:31,189 It's so good to see you. 232 00:08:31,257 --> 00:08:33,224 - Spencer, I really need my stu... - Shh. 233 00:08:34,793 --> 00:08:37,462 I need something, too. 234 00:08:37,529 --> 00:08:38,896 ♪ She's dressed in yellow, she says hello... ♪ 235 00:08:38,964 --> 00:08:40,932 Thanks for taking me to the airport, Jess. 236 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,367 Of course. 237 00:08:42,434 --> 00:08:46,037 All you have is your bike, Rochelle. 238 00:08:46,105 --> 00:08:47,138 ♪ You want it ♪ 239 00:08:47,206 --> 00:08:50,141 ♪ You got it ♪ 240 00:08:50,209 --> 00:08:52,410 ♪ You want it, baby ♪ 241 00:08:52,478 --> 00:08:54,045 ♪ You got it, uh ♪ ♪ Just bust a move, uh ♪ 242 00:08:54,113 --> 00:08:55,713 ♪ You want it. ♪ 243 00:08:59,652 --> 00:09:01,786 $550 for the TV? 244 00:09:01,854 --> 00:09:03,555 Seems a little steep. 245 00:09:03,822 --> 00:09:05,290 I'm gonna write down a figure 246 00:09:05,358 --> 00:09:07,659 and this is as high as I'll go. 247 00:09:11,463 --> 00:09:13,698 You drew a smiley face. 248 00:09:13,766 --> 00:09:15,033 I'm a teacher. 249 00:09:15,100 --> 00:09:16,234 Do it for the kids. 250 00:09:16,302 --> 00:09:20,138 For the kids, $550. 251 00:09:20,206 --> 00:09:21,873 I can't go home without a TV. 252 00:09:21,941 --> 00:09:23,474 I thought pawnshops 253 00:09:23,542 --> 00:09:25,076 were about helping people, and frankly, 254 00:09:25,144 --> 00:09:26,978 right now I feel taken advantage of, 255 00:09:27,046 --> 00:09:29,647 and I just got out of a long relationship 256 00:09:29,715 --> 00:09:31,583 and I don't know what I'm doing emotionally 257 00:09:31,650 --> 00:09:33,818 or-- let's be honest-- sexually. 258 00:09:36,022 --> 00:09:39,657 I'll just... just get out of here. 259 00:09:45,531 --> 00:09:47,432 Are you trying to rob me? 260 00:09:53,839 --> 00:09:55,307 Hey, where's Winston at, man? 261 00:09:55,374 --> 00:09:57,109 I think he's in his room, Schmidt. 262 00:09:59,545 --> 00:10:00,712 You really think I'm top dog? 263 00:10:03,115 --> 00:10:04,082 Yes. 264 00:10:04,150 --> 00:10:05,517 You think I'm head baller, shot caller? 265 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:09,488 Yes, Schmidt, I feel that way. 266 00:10:11,823 --> 00:10:12,991 See that, man? 267 00:10:13,059 --> 00:10:14,793 That's my new thumb ring. How choice is that? 268 00:10:15,861 --> 00:10:18,163 Little skull-- it's so nectar. 269 00:10:18,231 --> 00:10:19,531 Did you just make up "nectar"? 270 00:10:19,599 --> 00:10:21,299 No, it's a volleyball term. 271 00:10:21,367 --> 00:10:22,834 What is Winston doing in there? 272 00:10:22,902 --> 00:10:24,035 He can't hang out in there-- it's too small. 273 00:10:24,502 --> 00:10:26,335 - What's up? - Yeah, what up Cece. 274 00:10:26,439 --> 00:10:27,439 Hey, are you all right? 275 00:10:27,507 --> 00:10:29,808 I'm sorry, I didn't get the TV. 276 00:10:29,876 --> 00:10:32,010 - What happened? - Ugh, I'm a terrible roommate. 277 00:10:32,077 --> 00:10:32,911 I mean, seriously, 278 00:10:32,979 --> 00:10:34,379 you guys told her to call Spencer? 279 00:10:34,447 --> 00:10:35,747 That is not your job. 280 00:10:35,815 --> 00:10:37,149 That is my job. 281 00:10:37,216 --> 00:10:38,183 All right, so what happened? 282 00:10:39,786 --> 00:10:42,020 He needed a ride to the airport. 283 00:10:42,088 --> 00:10:42,954 What? 284 00:10:43,022 --> 00:10:45,123 For his new girlfriend. 285 00:10:45,191 --> 00:10:46,424 - Are you kidding me? - Are you serious? 286 00:10:46,992 --> 00:10:49,094 I'm supposed to pick her up next Sunday. 287 00:10:49,162 --> 00:10:51,163 - Oh, my God, Jess. - Wow! 288 00:10:51,230 --> 00:10:52,564 What's wrong with me?! 289 00:10:52,632 --> 00:10:53,999 I figured it out. 290 00:10:54,066 --> 00:10:56,234 This guy's your Kryptonite. 291 00:10:56,302 --> 00:10:59,371 You need to stand up, and you need to fight him. 292 00:10:59,438 --> 00:11:02,073 I tried to fight him, but I can't, 'cause I'm powerless. 293 00:11:02,141 --> 00:11:03,308 'Cause you're not ready to let him go. 294 00:11:03,376 --> 00:11:05,377 I think you know deep down, 295 00:11:05,444 --> 00:11:07,012 once you get your stuff back, 296 00:11:07,079 --> 00:11:09,181 you know, it's over over. 297 00:11:09,248 --> 00:11:10,715 I can't believe 298 00:11:10,783 --> 00:11:12,350 I'm actually gonna say this, 299 00:11:12,418 --> 00:11:14,753 but I agree with him. 300 00:11:17,824 --> 00:11:19,291 No, you guys are wrong. 301 00:11:19,358 --> 00:11:21,426 I really... I really want to move on. 302 00:11:21,494 --> 00:11:23,528 - Then you got to fight. - All right, I want to fight. 303 00:11:23,596 --> 00:11:25,096 - And get mad. - I want to get mad. 304 00:11:25,164 --> 00:11:26,598 All right, then let's do this. 305 00:11:26,666 --> 00:11:28,533 Pretend this is Spencer's face. Punch it. 306 00:11:32,036 --> 00:11:33,071 Get him. 307 00:11:35,241 --> 00:11:37,275 Come on, do it again. 308 00:11:37,341 --> 00:11:38,211 Punch it like a man... 309 00:11:38,341 --> 00:11:40,411 - Harder than that! - C'mom, Jess. 310 00:11:40,541 --> 00:11:41,611 C'mon, Jess. Get angry! 311 00:11:41,714 --> 00:11:43,449 - Good! - Get angry! Real angry. 312 00:11:43,450 --> 00:11:45,216 That's dancing, that's punch-dancing. 313 00:11:45,317 --> 00:11:46,518 He broke your heart. 314 00:11:46,586 --> 00:11:47,853 He did terrible things to you. You hate him. 315 00:11:48,420 --> 00:11:49,321 I'm mad! 316 00:11:49,388 --> 00:11:51,223 Good! - There you go. I'm bad! 317 00:11:51,290 --> 00:11:52,657 You're ready. Go get your stuff. 318 00:11:52,725 --> 00:11:54,526 - I'm gonna go get my stuff! - Go get him! 319 00:11:54,594 --> 00:11:55,660 Come on, Jess. 320 00:11:55,728 --> 00:11:56,728 I'm really mad! 321 00:11:56,796 --> 00:11:58,229 - Proud of you. - Gonna go get it! 322 00:11:58,297 --> 00:11:59,564 Get your stuff. 323 00:11:59,632 --> 00:12:01,299 I'm gonna face the facts. 324 00:12:01,367 --> 00:12:05,036 I'm gonna ask you guys right now to come with me. 325 00:12:07,604 --> 00:12:08,640 Seriously, guys. 326 00:12:08,708 --> 00:12:10,375 - All right, yeah, yeah. - 'Cause I can't carry everything alone, 327 00:12:10,443 --> 00:12:12,210 and I can't be alone. 328 00:12:13,713 --> 00:12:16,081 Yeah! Loud music! 329 00:12:16,148 --> 00:12:19,618 Loud. It's loud. 330 00:12:19,685 --> 00:12:21,353 Okay, you are ruining my pre-game mix. 331 00:12:21,420 --> 00:12:24,823 - What am I gonna say? - Hey, Spencer, give me my TV back. 332 00:12:24,891 --> 00:12:26,925 Hi, Spencer. Give me my TV back, buddy. 333 00:12:26,993 --> 00:12:28,994 No "buddy." How about "jerk" or "idiot"? 334 00:12:29,061 --> 00:12:30,161 Mr. Crabs. 335 00:12:30,229 --> 00:12:32,230 Mr. Crabs is an option. 336 00:12:32,298 --> 00:12:33,832 Your hand is on my leg. 337 00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:35,533 Oh, your hand's on my leg. 338 00:12:35,601 --> 00:12:37,135 No, it really isn't. 339 00:12:37,203 --> 00:12:39,537 Classic he said, she said. 340 00:12:39,605 --> 00:12:41,907 Okay, Jess, just pull over right there. 341 00:12:46,279 --> 00:12:48,113 What are you doing? It was right there. 342 00:12:48,180 --> 00:12:49,881 Okay, you know what? Just one more shot. 343 00:12:49,949 --> 00:12:53,218 One more time around, Jess, and then we're good. You got this. 344 00:12:53,286 --> 00:12:54,786 Here we go. This is the one. 345 00:12:54,854 --> 00:12:57,088 All right, you got this, Jess. Come on. 346 00:12:59,292 --> 00:13:00,725 - I... - Just one more time. 347 00:13:02,428 --> 00:13:04,629 ...didn't want to, you know. 348 00:13:04,697 --> 00:13:07,065 Ok this is the time, this is the time... 349 00:13:07,133 --> 00:13:08,566 One more shot, one more shot. 350 00:13:08,634 --> 00:13:10,635 Just one more. Just one more. 351 00:13:10,703 --> 00:13:12,837 - You know, I'm on to you. - What do you mean? 352 00:13:12,905 --> 00:13:14,673 Okay, you told me that I'm top dog, 353 00:13:14,740 --> 00:13:17,008 but secretly, you think you're top dog, all right? 354 00:13:17,076 --> 00:13:19,811 And now you're just trying to out-top dog the top dog. 355 00:13:19,879 --> 00:13:21,646 Jess, can you please take these doors off child-lock 356 00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:22,514 so I can kill myself? 357 00:13:22,581 --> 00:13:24,182 Men working. 358 00:13:24,250 --> 00:13:25,884 Look, things are different now, man, all right? 359 00:13:25,952 --> 00:13:27,652 You're not top dog anymore. I am. 360 00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:29,421 Okay, you know what? You are absolutely correct. 361 00:13:29,488 --> 00:13:31,022 You are the top dog. 362 00:13:31,090 --> 00:13:33,490 - Here. - What are you doing? 363 00:13:34,058 --> 00:13:35,525 There's no top dog crown. 364 00:13:35,593 --> 00:13:37,028 What, are you trying to make me look stupid? 365 00:13:37,096 --> 00:13:39,397 Look, man, this is about respect. 366 00:13:39,465 --> 00:13:41,166 I'm a lot flyer than I used to be. 367 00:13:41,233 --> 00:13:42,567 Yeah, much flyer. I respect you, Schmidt. 368 00:13:42,635 --> 00:13:44,135 No, you don't. 369 00:13:44,203 --> 00:13:46,338 Because if you did, you would have told me 370 00:13:46,405 --> 00:13:48,606 that the small room is the top dog room. 371 00:13:56,682 --> 00:13:59,317 ♪ Just when I thought our chance had past ♪ 372 00:13:59,385 --> 00:14:01,119 What? I own this song. 373 00:14:01,187 --> 00:14:07,325 ♪ You go and save the best for last... ♪ 374 00:14:11,330 --> 00:14:12,864 What's happening? 375 00:14:12,932 --> 00:14:15,100 What's happening is that this is a great song. 376 00:14:18,970 --> 00:14:21,338 I'll be out here if you need me, Jess. 377 00:14:31,951 --> 00:14:34,319 Oh, hey, Jess-Jess. 378 00:14:34,387 --> 00:14:37,322 That's the wizard? He's wearing a scrunchie. 379 00:14:37,390 --> 00:14:39,524 Looks like he juggles clubs on the beach. 380 00:14:39,592 --> 00:14:41,126 Yeah, like he'd ever have a job. 381 00:14:41,193 --> 00:14:42,694 Didn't you just kind of assume 382 00:14:42,762 --> 00:14:44,629 he'd have a handlebar moustache? 383 00:14:44,697 --> 00:14:47,132 Come on, Jess, just go in there and get that TV. 384 00:14:48,567 --> 00:14:49,934 I miss you, Jess. 385 00:14:50,002 --> 00:14:51,469 Don't hug him back. 386 00:14:53,506 --> 00:14:55,073 - Ugh! - Oh, that's not good. 387 00:14:58,443 --> 00:15:00,512 I told you to water the plants. 388 00:15:00,579 --> 00:15:02,881 Huh? Oh. Oh, you know it's not my thing. 389 00:15:03,948 --> 00:15:05,216 I told you to water the plants. 390 00:15:07,420 --> 00:15:09,421 What is she doing? 391 00:15:13,726 --> 00:15:15,660 Oh! Oh, what a mess! 392 00:15:17,129 --> 00:15:18,563 I'm coming in! 393 00:15:18,631 --> 00:15:20,365 Jess, take your shoes off! 394 00:15:20,433 --> 00:15:22,067 We keep an Asian household. 395 00:15:22,134 --> 00:15:23,535 Didn't see that coming. 396 00:15:24,802 --> 00:15:27,472 She going to be okay in there? 397 00:15:38,416 --> 00:15:39,584 I've got it! 398 00:15:40,652 --> 00:15:42,187 It's really heavy, but I got it! 399 00:15:42,254 --> 00:15:44,722 Oh, my God, we created a monster. 400 00:15:46,090 --> 00:15:48,326 She looks like Helena Bonham Carter. 401 00:15:49,194 --> 00:15:50,794 Soft hands, Jess. 402 00:15:50,862 --> 00:15:52,730 Jess, come on, let's share it. You know, work out a system. 403 00:15:53,798 --> 00:15:56,400 Hey... Hey, that's my shirt. 404 00:15:56,869 --> 00:15:59,737 - No, this is my T-shirt. - No, that is my shirt. 405 00:15:59,805 --> 00:16:00,472 It has my name on it. 406 00:16:00,539 --> 00:16:01,639 Don't drop it. Jess, don't... 407 00:16:01,707 --> 00:16:03,475 Don't drop the... No, no, no... 408 00:16:03,542 --> 00:16:05,009 Come on, everybody out now. 409 00:16:06,077 --> 00:16:08,580 - Ugh! Give me my shirt! - Come on, I like this shirt. 410 00:16:08,647 --> 00:16:10,915 Hey, Jess, no, no, no, no, no, stop, stop, stop, stop. 411 00:16:10,983 --> 00:16:13,217 Sorry. Don't mind us, pal. We're just here for the TV. 412 00:16:13,285 --> 00:16:14,986 - Who are these guys? - They're my roommates. 413 00:16:15,054 --> 00:16:17,889 - Cece, hi. - I'm gonna go in and get the rest of your stuff, Jess. 414 00:16:17,957 --> 00:16:19,790 Wait, Jess, let's just talk about this, okay? 415 00:16:19,858 --> 00:16:21,059 You know, rap it out. 416 00:16:21,127 --> 00:16:22,827 No, we can rap it out. We're not together anymore. 417 00:16:22,894 --> 00:16:23,862 It's not the same. 418 00:16:23,929 --> 00:16:25,864 It doesn't mean we can't talk about things. 419 00:16:25,931 --> 00:16:27,966 There's nothing to talk about. Give me my shirt back. 420 00:16:28,433 --> 00:16:30,170 No, you gave this to me. I want to keep it. 421 00:16:31,033 --> 00:16:32,470 Give her her T-shirt, man. 422 00:16:32,538 --> 00:16:34,605 No, I don't want to, you know, and I gave her this hat, too, 423 00:16:34,673 --> 00:16:35,640 so I'm gonna take this back. 424 00:16:35,708 --> 00:16:37,008 This one? - Yeah. You want that? 425 00:16:37,076 --> 00:16:38,309 - Yeah. - Then I dare you-- 426 00:16:38,377 --> 00:16:39,744 come take it off my head, pal. 427 00:16:43,081 --> 00:16:44,015 I dare you. 428 00:16:48,254 --> 00:16:49,687 You guys look ridiculous. 429 00:16:49,755 --> 00:16:51,256 Look, dude, give her the shirt back. 430 00:16:51,323 --> 00:16:52,957 I bet she worked hard on that jamboree. 431 00:16:53,025 --> 00:16:56,094 Yeah, it's a play on words-- Jam-boree. 432 00:16:56,162 --> 00:16:56,961 - Jam. - Jam. 433 00:16:57,029 --> 00:16:59,831 Girl made a lot of jam, Spence. 434 00:16:59,899 --> 00:17:01,766 You know how time-consuming that can be? 435 00:17:01,834 --> 00:17:04,102 You need a jar funnel, a canner, 436 00:17:04,170 --> 00:17:07,238 some fresh fruit-- strawberries, raspberries, 437 00:17:07,305 --> 00:17:09,507 maybe a tayberry, maybe a ripe... 438 00:17:09,575 --> 00:17:10,211 No more fruit, Schmidt. 439 00:17:10,275 --> 00:17:13,011 You live with these people, Jess? Seriously? 440 00:17:13,078 --> 00:17:14,913 You can stay here until you find a better place to live. 441 00:17:14,980 --> 00:17:16,347 You know what? I don't like you, stretch. 442 00:17:17,215 --> 00:17:18,249 I don't like anything 443 00:17:18,317 --> 00:17:21,586 - about you, and I'm not afraid to... - I got this. 444 00:17:25,257 --> 00:17:27,158 I've got a place to live, Spence. 445 00:17:27,726 --> 00:17:29,527 It's over. 446 00:17:29,594 --> 00:17:31,128 I spent six years 447 00:17:31,196 --> 00:17:33,030 trying to figure you out. 448 00:17:33,098 --> 00:17:35,066 All you are is a guy 449 00:17:35,133 --> 00:17:37,234 with really beautiful hair. 450 00:17:37,302 --> 00:17:38,669 I'm happy you cheated on me. 451 00:17:39,237 --> 00:17:40,404 Thank you. 452 00:17:40,472 --> 00:17:44,108 Because if you hadn't, I would have married you. 453 00:17:44,176 --> 00:17:46,410 And then you would have hurt me all over again. 454 00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:51,015 And, yeah, I was scared to start over. 455 00:17:51,083 --> 00:17:52,750 I didn't know what to do, 456 00:17:52,818 --> 00:17:54,953 and yeah, I'm living with three guys I met on the Internet. 457 00:17:55,020 --> 00:17:57,288 And yeah, stranger danger is real. 458 00:17:57,355 --> 00:17:59,056 But I love these guys. 459 00:18:00,659 --> 00:18:02,693 I barely know them, 460 00:18:02,761 --> 00:18:04,229 I just met him, 461 00:18:04,597 --> 00:18:06,064 but I love them. 462 00:18:06,131 --> 00:18:07,665 I would just take it easy with the love stuff. 463 00:18:07,733 --> 00:18:10,167 All of them. 464 00:18:13,905 --> 00:18:16,006 Give her the shirt back, man. 465 00:18:19,978 --> 00:18:21,011 What happens if I say no? 466 00:18:21,079 --> 00:18:23,380 You know what happens? 467 00:18:23,448 --> 00:18:25,049 Schmidt happens! 468 00:18:25,117 --> 00:18:26,584 Ow! 469 00:18:26,651 --> 00:18:28,018 What was on your hand? 470 00:18:28,086 --> 00:18:29,353 Thumb ring, bitch. 471 00:18:29,421 --> 00:18:31,155 You got some Schmidt on your face. 472 00:18:32,824 --> 00:18:35,593 You know what? Fine! Here, take it! 473 00:18:37,062 --> 00:18:38,462 - Keep the bell. - What? 474 00:18:41,266 --> 00:18:43,868 You know, I thought we were gonna handle this like adults, Jess. 475 00:18:43,935 --> 00:18:47,037 Yeah, well, I thought you were the love of my life, so... 476 00:18:49,141 --> 00:18:52,276 Suck it, Mr. Crabs. 477 00:19:07,507 --> 00:19:09,041 You hit that guy. 478 00:19:09,909 --> 00:19:11,543 Whatever. You know. 479 00:19:13,012 --> 00:19:14,646 You know what? 480 00:19:14,714 --> 00:19:17,649 Maybe I didn't have respect for you before, because 481 00:19:17,717 --> 00:19:20,051 if this is what respecting you feels like, 482 00:19:20,119 --> 00:19:22,521 this is definitely not how I felt. 483 00:19:22,588 --> 00:19:26,525 So, you recognize. Represent, what? 484 00:19:26,592 --> 00:19:28,960 Okay, look, I'm gonna be completely honest. 485 00:19:29,028 --> 00:19:30,329 I've been messing with you. 486 00:19:30,397 --> 00:19:32,498 But it's just that I wanted my old room back. 487 00:19:32,565 --> 00:19:34,533 You know, you're right. 488 00:19:34,601 --> 00:19:36,635 I've been away a long time, and things have changed around here, 489 00:19:36,703 --> 00:19:38,937 so I guess I kind of got to get used to that. 490 00:19:39,005 --> 00:19:40,639 You can keep the big room. 491 00:19:40,707 --> 00:19:43,609 See, now you're just deep dogging me, man. 492 00:19:43,677 --> 00:19:46,578 I'm not scared of your mind games. 493 00:19:46,646 --> 00:19:49,515 I'm taking the small room, Winston. 494 00:19:49,582 --> 00:19:51,417 Schmidt, that's not what I mean, but... 495 00:19:51,484 --> 00:19:53,152 No, no, no, no, no. Why don't you listen to what I mean? 496 00:19:53,219 --> 00:19:57,189 You can double reverse dog me until the cows come home. 497 00:19:57,257 --> 00:19:59,291 I'm not falling for it. 498 00:19:59,359 --> 00:20:01,093 What do you take me for, 499 00:20:01,161 --> 00:20:03,095 some kind of idiot? 500 00:20:04,832 --> 00:20:06,966 Yes. 501 00:20:10,737 --> 00:20:12,805 Can't believe I got all my stuff back. 502 00:20:12,872 --> 00:20:15,575 You did, but most of it's broken. 503 00:20:15,642 --> 00:20:19,411 Yeah, it's broken, but-- I don't know-- it's mine. 504 00:20:19,479 --> 00:20:22,381 Yeah, but it's broken. Hey, look at that. 505 00:20:22,449 --> 00:20:24,083 - I think it's working. - Oh, my God! 506 00:20:24,150 --> 00:20:26,135 - We got a TV again. - It's a TV, and it's working. 507 00:20:26,152 --> 00:20:29,188 Hey, we got the TV back! 508 00:20:29,255 --> 00:20:31,957 All right! 509 00:20:32,025 --> 00:20:33,326 You guys are awesome. 510 00:20:33,393 --> 00:20:35,461 I'm going to make you so much jam. 511 00:20:35,528 --> 00:20:37,162 Please don't. 512 00:20:37,230 --> 00:20:38,831 ♪ Oh, we're gonna have a jam sess. ♪ 513 00:20:38,898 --> 00:20:40,165 Absolutely not. 514 00:20:44,136 --> 00:20:45,904 Okay, what are we watching? 515 00:20:45,972 --> 00:20:47,606 I have some DVDs. 516 00:20:47,674 --> 00:20:49,675 Um, Adventures in Babysitting, 517 00:20:49,743 --> 00:20:53,212 uh, Prancer, Newsies, Curly Sue. 518 00:20:53,279 --> 00:20:54,880 I'm going out. 519 00:20:54,948 --> 00:20:57,549 Yeah. 520 00:20:57,617 --> 00:21:00,686 Wait. Where are you guys going? 521 00:21:01,754 --> 00:21:03,655 These are heartwarming films. 522 00:21:08,492 --> 00:21:10,960 - Curly Sue. Let's do this. - All right, let me go get it. 523 00:21:11,763 --> 00:21:17,135 Sync & corrections by Alice WEBDL by ConstB www.addic7ed.com