1 00:00:01,770 --> 00:00:04,051 To my dear friends, Melissa and Sadie. 2 00:00:04,076 --> 00:00:05,454 - Aw. - Five years together. 3 00:00:05,477 --> 00:00:06,612 - That is awesome. - Hear, hear. 4 00:00:06,637 --> 00:00:08,396 - What is your secret? - I don't really think there is 5 00:00:08,415 --> 00:00:10,149 a secret. I think it's just about... 6 00:00:10,706 --> 00:00:12,921 love, understanding, and... 7 00:00:13,228 --> 00:00:14,409 two sets of boobs. 8 00:00:14,471 --> 00:00:16,718 I love boobs. I love 'em. 9 00:00:16,842 --> 00:00:19,893 - I love... - Okay - ...everything about 'em. - Yeah, I do, too. 10 00:00:19,916 --> 00:00:21,385 All different kinds. 11 00:00:21,414 --> 00:00:23,254 Yeah, that's my thing too. 12 00:00:23,299 --> 00:00:24,360 I love them. 13 00:00:24,384 --> 00:00:26,877 And the Curiosity Rover has touched down 14 00:00:26,897 --> 00:00:28,527 - on the planet of Mars. - What's happening right now? 15 00:00:28,551 --> 00:00:29,470 What's happening in there? 16 00:00:29,486 --> 00:00:31,812 Schmidt's in there with his boss. 17 00:00:32,137 --> 00:00:33,387 He's entertaining her. 18 00:00:33,399 --> 00:00:34,281 Ew. 19 00:00:34,358 --> 00:00:35,693 I don't care what he does. 20 00:00:35,711 --> 00:00:38,016 I just don't understand why he has to narrate it! 21 00:00:38,034 --> 00:00:39,772 Robot arm engaged! 22 00:00:39,904 --> 00:00:41,385 It's just engaged now? 23 00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:43,705 So he's saying everything up to this point 24 00:00:43,729 --> 00:00:44,960 has been foreplay? 25 00:00:44,983 --> 00:00:46,203 Are you kidding me? That's ridiculous. 26 00:00:46,226 --> 00:00:48,414 What are you gonna do for 20 minutes of foreplay? 27 00:00:48,436 --> 00:00:50,812 Boring! Yawn! 28 00:00:53,181 --> 00:00:54,446 Am I right, ladies? 29 00:00:54,469 --> 00:00:56,470 So, I actually know what's about to happen next. 30 00:00:56,513 --> 00:00:59,314 - You will all want to cover your ears. - I found water! 31 00:00:59,354 --> 00:01:01,292 - No, I didn't do it in time. - Oh, he found... 32 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:03,275 Has anybody seen a movie in the last five months, 33 00:01:03,294 --> 00:01:06,233 and can you describe the plot in great detail and loudly? 34 00:01:06,264 --> 00:01:08,552 - Okay, you're dry. - Actually, I'm good. Thank you. 35 00:01:08,583 --> 00:01:11,205 Come on. I spent six dollars on this wine. 36 00:01:11,245 --> 00:01:13,512 I've been looking for the right time to tell you tonight, 37 00:01:13,580 --> 00:01:16,383 A Space Odyssey theme) but Melissa and I are so excited 38 00:01:16,408 --> 00:01:17,933 because... Wow. 39 00:01:17,952 --> 00:01:19,719 That is so upsetting. 40 00:01:21,062 --> 00:01:23,118 What mission is this based on?! 41 00:01:23,138 --> 00:01:25,039 I'm pregnant! We are pregnant! 42 00:01:25,064 --> 00:01:27,531 Wha...? 43 00:01:31,542 --> 00:01:34,030 Lesbian baby. Congratulations, you guys. 44 00:01:34,903 --> 00:01:36,419 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 45 00:01:36,449 --> 00:01:38,689 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ ♪ It's Jess. ♪ 46 00:01:38,708 --> 00:01:43,044 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com Resync for WEB-DL by Norther 47 00:01:43,634 --> 00:01:45,152 I feel so lucky, you know? 48 00:01:45,173 --> 00:01:47,474 Like I really tucked this one in just under the wire. 49 00:01:47,505 --> 00:01:49,099 What do you mean? You're so young. 50 00:01:49,123 --> 00:01:51,258 As your friendly neighborhood gynecologist, 51 00:01:51,285 --> 00:01:53,631 you should know that by the time a lady hits 30, 52 00:01:53,651 --> 00:01:55,985 she loses about 90% of her eggs. 53 00:01:56,665 --> 00:01:57,730 - What? No, th-that 54 00:01:57,761 --> 00:01:58,795 - can't be true. - What? 55 00:01:58,824 --> 00:01:59,914 Did you know that there's a test 56 00:01:59,939 --> 00:02:01,402 that you can take that tells you how many beans 57 00:02:01,426 --> 00:02:03,021 - you got left in your bean sack? - Ovaries. 58 00:02:03,084 --> 00:02:04,304 It estimates basically 59 00:02:04,322 --> 00:02:06,238 how many childbearing years you have left. 60 00:02:06,285 --> 00:02:07,318 Yeah, get this baloney: 61 00:02:07,368 --> 00:02:09,742 I'm 32, but my eggs are 48, 62 00:02:09,841 --> 00:02:12,354 and my vagina is 97. 63 00:02:12,372 --> 00:02:13,843 - I am so uncomfortable. - But it gets 64 00:02:13,874 --> 00:02:15,476 better with age-- it's like 65 00:02:15,494 --> 00:02:17,395 - the vagina Helen Mirren. - Oh, boy. 66 00:02:17,418 --> 00:02:19,089 I've got big plans for the centennial. 67 00:02:19,126 --> 00:02:20,332 When can I take that test? 68 00:02:20,350 --> 00:02:22,347 Who cares? Personally, I'm still on 69 00:02:22,377 --> 00:02:23,884 the please-God-I-hope- I'm-not-pregnant phase. 70 00:02:23,909 --> 00:02:25,350 - What am I doing here? - You know, just 71 00:02:25,382 --> 00:02:27,063 clinically speaking, it's probably 72 00:02:27,075 --> 00:02:28,376 - a good idea to know. - I want 73 00:02:28,394 --> 00:02:29,510 to take this test! Like, now. 74 00:02:29,545 --> 00:02:30,678 Can we take this test right now? 75 00:02:30,722 --> 00:02:31,507 Morning, ladies. 76 00:02:31,543 --> 00:02:32,543 And Nick. 77 00:02:32,583 --> 00:02:33,746 - Morning? - Well, I mean, I work 78 00:02:33,764 --> 00:02:36,428 nights now, so I'm on an adjusted sleeping schedule. 79 00:02:36,559 --> 00:02:38,546 I just woke up, here's my breakfast, 80 00:02:38,571 --> 00:02:39,473 I'm going to work. 81 00:02:39,498 --> 00:02:40,991 Take me with you! They're talking about vaginas! 82 00:02:41,009 --> 00:02:42,321 I hate it! Take me with you! 83 00:02:45,068 --> 00:02:47,134 Our bodies really made something. 84 00:02:47,502 --> 00:02:49,439 I feel like we brought manufacturing jobs 85 00:02:49,476 --> 00:02:51,682 - back to America. - Yeah, it was fine. 86 00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:53,321 What do you mean "fine"? 87 00:02:53,450 --> 00:02:54,838 I broke your brain, girl. 88 00:02:54,910 --> 00:02:56,752 How do I put this delicately? 89 00:02:56,909 --> 00:02:58,076 I was... 90 00:02:58,137 --> 00:03:00,038 nowhere close to finishing. 91 00:03:00,731 --> 00:03:01,762 I was bored. 92 00:03:01,936 --> 00:03:03,394 And cold. 93 00:03:06,782 --> 00:03:09,407 That's cool. Uh... 94 00:03:09,813 --> 00:03:10,936 No, yeah. 95 00:03:13,031 --> 00:03:14,365 World shattered. 96 00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:16,347 We'll try again. It'll be better. 97 00:03:16,479 --> 00:03:19,010 The world I once lived in... shattered. 98 00:03:19,049 --> 00:03:20,045 All right, see you at work. 99 00:03:20,080 --> 00:03:21,882 See you at work. 100 00:03:22,649 --> 00:03:24,439 Put me on the air. I got something to say 101 00:03:24,458 --> 00:03:25,964 about Andrew Bynum's hair. 102 00:03:26,144 --> 00:03:28,240 All right, caller, you're up next. 103 00:03:28,879 --> 00:03:30,667 Look at you, man. This is great. 104 00:03:30,707 --> 00:03:32,182 You're the king of your own castle. 105 00:03:33,949 --> 00:03:35,594 Look at this. What is this? 106 00:03:35,718 --> 00:03:37,768 Why do you need so many pens, you big shot? 107 00:03:37,792 --> 00:03:39,594 I like what I do, man. I finally feel like my life 108 00:03:39,619 --> 00:03:41,078 is moving in the right direction. 109 00:03:41,109 --> 00:03:43,434 That is what I don't have in my life. 110 00:03:44,254 --> 00:03:45,717 But not anymore. 111 00:03:46,624 --> 00:03:48,125 I'm gonna take one of these pens, 112 00:03:48,192 --> 00:03:49,547 I'm gonna go home, 113 00:03:49,578 --> 00:03:51,606 and I'm gonna write my zombie novel. 114 00:03:52,585 --> 00:03:53,986 You don't think I can do it, do you? 115 00:03:54,009 --> 00:03:55,516 You know, it's not that. It's just that sometimes 116 00:03:55,545 --> 00:03:56,912 I get the feeling that you... 117 00:03:57,067 --> 00:03:58,630 don't want to write. 118 00:04:05,325 --> 00:04:07,225 No more excuses. I'm gonna go home, 119 00:04:07,256 --> 00:04:08,550 and I'm gonna write that novel. 120 00:04:08,593 --> 00:04:09,969 And I'll be the first to read it. 121 00:04:10,037 --> 00:04:11,489 - We got a deal, friend. - Deal. 122 00:04:11,513 --> 00:04:12,883 Yeah, you still have me on the line. 123 00:04:12,913 --> 00:04:15,247 My two cents? He's never gonna write that book. 124 00:04:15,283 --> 00:04:17,689 - Why don't you shut up, Manny from Cerritos?- Okay. 125 00:04:17,714 --> 00:04:19,794 - Who asked you? Hang up the phone. - All right. 126 00:04:20,395 --> 00:04:21,596 We should go. 127 00:04:21,651 --> 00:04:23,304 Melissa's been drinking for two. 128 00:04:23,570 --> 00:04:24,271 Three. 129 00:04:24,288 --> 00:04:25,822 Awesome night, ladies. 130 00:04:25,871 --> 00:04:27,623 - Educational. Thank you. - Sorry. I'm just... 131 00:04:27,669 --> 00:04:29,016 - Okay. I'm sorry. - What? 132 00:04:29,041 --> 00:04:31,184 Sadie, before you leave, can I just ask you a few questions? 133 00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:32,365 I know where this is going. 134 00:04:32,389 --> 00:04:33,696 You are a gynecologist 135 00:04:33,742 --> 00:04:36,130 and a lesbian, which makes you... 136 00:04:36,177 --> 00:04:37,129 well, a va-genius. 137 00:04:37,169 --> 00:04:38,221 - Jar. - I know 138 00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:39,688 my way around a Grizzly Adams. 139 00:04:39,725 --> 00:04:40,988 You, too? Jar. 140 00:04:41,058 --> 00:04:42,585 - Wh... - As an adult male, 141 00:04:42,619 --> 00:04:45,284 I would like to ask you a few questions about, you know, 142 00:04:45,309 --> 00:04:46,422 the downstairs girl cookie. 143 00:04:46,447 --> 00:04:47,967 Jars, jars, all around jars! 144 00:04:47,991 --> 00:04:49,945 This is my personal time right now. 145 00:04:49,972 --> 00:04:51,699 You can make an appointment at my office, 146 00:04:51,724 --> 00:04:53,537 pay your $40 co-pay. 147 00:04:53,582 --> 00:04:55,383 I will be happy to answer your questions. 148 00:04:55,452 --> 00:04:56,886 Yes! I'm in. Please. 149 00:04:57,040 --> 00:04:59,476 Now, would I have to put my legs up in the stirrups? 150 00:04:59,495 --> 00:05:01,436 - Why would you? - I'm asking more so out of curiosity 151 00:05:01,463 --> 00:05:03,597 - than fear. #excitement. - Are you done? 152 00:05:03,690 --> 00:05:05,373 I'm done. I'll see you, okay? 153 00:05:05,391 --> 00:05:06,625 - I'm gonna call the office. - Okay. 154 00:05:06,883 --> 00:05:08,917 Well, thank you, guys, for the... 155 00:05:08,984 --> 00:05:10,360 awesome drunky 156 00:05:10,379 --> 00:05:12,161 - thing and the weirdly sobering end. - Look, 157 00:05:12,180 --> 00:05:14,295 I know Sadie freaked you out with all this talk about tests, 158 00:05:14,323 --> 00:05:16,636 but I just want to remind you that at the end of the day, 159 00:05:16,693 --> 00:05:18,826 it's all about love. 160 00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:21,125 I mean, I love Sadie. 161 00:05:21,223 --> 00:05:23,823 I want my babies to have her beautiful face. 162 00:05:24,047 --> 00:05:26,189 As long as they don't get her big, fat man-feet. 163 00:05:26,232 --> 00:05:28,745 Yuck. Fingers crossed we go donor on that one. 164 00:05:28,859 --> 00:05:29,570 Okay. 165 00:05:29,595 --> 00:05:31,286 - Let's make a graceful exit, my love. - Okay. 166 00:05:31,323 --> 00:05:33,592 Hey, get out of here, you crazy lesbos, 167 00:05:33,604 --> 00:05:34,713 with your baby-making! 168 00:05:34,737 --> 00:05:35,937 - Ooh! - Whoo! 169 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,666 Ah! I'm married; I'm not dead! 170 00:05:37,743 --> 00:05:39,824 - Night. - See you. 171 00:05:41,096 --> 00:05:42,988 Drive safely. 172 00:05:46,537 --> 00:05:48,558 90% of our eggs, huh? 173 00:05:48,899 --> 00:05:51,412 That's crazy. I'm panicking. You panicking? 174 00:05:51,437 --> 00:05:54,285 God, no. Babies wreck you, Jess. 175 00:05:54,433 --> 00:05:56,327 They literally eat your body. 176 00:05:56,350 --> 00:05:58,506 I'm 30, I'm single, 177 00:05:58,586 --> 00:06:00,786 and I just started a new job. 178 00:06:00,895 --> 00:06:02,120 Tonight 179 00:06:02,169 --> 00:06:03,325 I used a bread roll 180 00:06:03,356 --> 00:06:04,657 to wipe butter off my face, 181 00:06:04,693 --> 00:06:06,593 and then I ate the bread roll, 182 00:06:06,637 --> 00:06:08,675 so I essentially used my face 183 00:06:08,727 --> 00:06:10,193 as a butter knife. 184 00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:11,438 I don't think I'm ready 185 00:06:11,463 --> 00:06:13,163 to bring new life into the world, but... 186 00:06:13,203 --> 00:06:15,599 what if all that's left are the weird eggs? 187 00:06:15,815 --> 00:06:17,415 And the evil eggs? 188 00:06:17,444 --> 00:06:19,366 You have no evil eggs. 189 00:06:19,390 --> 00:06:21,357 I can feel them. They're turning. 190 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:23,665 They watched their brothers and sisters die, 191 00:06:23,719 --> 00:06:25,520 and now they want to be birthed. 192 00:06:25,743 --> 00:06:27,368 I need to be fertilized. 193 00:06:29,113 --> 00:06:31,585 Fertilize me, Los Angeles! 194 00:06:31,624 --> 00:06:32,792 Calm down, all right? 195 00:06:32,822 --> 00:06:33,849 You're overreacting. 196 00:06:33,874 --> 00:06:35,677 I am overreacting! You know why? 197 00:06:35,704 --> 00:06:37,404 Because I want a family. 198 00:06:37,497 --> 00:06:39,460 I want to give my nipples a purpose. 199 00:06:39,999 --> 00:06:41,801 Give my nipples a purpose! 200 00:06:41,873 --> 00:06:43,288 Oh, yeah! - Oh, God, that was a mistake. 201 00:06:43,319 --> 00:06:45,587 Duck down. That was a mistake. 202 00:06:46,336 --> 00:06:47,786 We're taking that test. 203 00:06:49,704 --> 00:06:52,505 Well I think that you guys made a really smart decision 204 00:06:52,535 --> 00:06:53,910 - coming in here today. - Sadie, 205 00:06:53,939 --> 00:06:56,905 once at a senior graduation party, 206 00:06:56,945 --> 00:07:00,314 I sat in a very hot Jacuzzi for... 12 hours. 207 00:07:00,351 --> 00:07:02,419 Is there any chance that I sunny-side upped my eggs? 208 00:07:02,444 --> 00:07:03,444 - No, Jess. - Oh, 209 00:07:03,470 --> 00:07:05,647 between the years of 1998 and 2005, 210 00:07:05,672 --> 00:07:07,507 I used a lot of self-tanner. 211 00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:08,885 Like, a lot. 212 00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:11,263 Is that a possibility of, um... 213 00:07:11,399 --> 00:07:12,500 - Do I... Okay. - Nope. 214 00:07:12,591 --> 00:07:14,459 Here we go. 215 00:07:14,965 --> 00:07:16,555 I once fell on a pommel horse... 216 00:07:16,580 --> 00:07:18,614 I'm gonna call you when I get the results. 217 00:07:20,337 --> 00:07:21,722 This is good. 218 00:07:25,034 --> 00:07:27,603 I got nothing. This is... 219 00:07:28,837 --> 00:07:30,783 Whoa, whoa, Jess, what are you doing? 220 00:07:30,820 --> 00:07:31,989 That's my ketchup collection! 221 00:07:32,014 --> 00:07:34,033 This fertility Web site says I need to get rid 222 00:07:34,064 --> 00:07:34,964 of anything with toxins. 223 00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:36,377 Did you put the microwave in the trash? 224 00:07:36,402 --> 00:07:37,608 - Yes. - Why would you do that? 225 00:07:37,627 --> 00:07:38,914 Microwaves zap things! 226 00:07:38,939 --> 00:07:40,508 - You can't take my microwave away! - Zap my insides! 227 00:07:40,546 --> 00:07:41,746 - It's the only thing I love! - I can't risk it! 228 00:07:41,771 --> 00:07:43,544 - It's what makes burritos delicious! - I don't care! 229 00:07:43,570 --> 00:07:46,324 You care about your burritos more than my children, Nick? 230 00:07:46,348 --> 00:07:48,020 - You're putting me in a tough spot. - Friends, 231 00:07:48,045 --> 00:07:49,981 I'm in a real-life sex pickle. 232 00:07:50,189 --> 00:07:53,859 My inability to satisfy Emma has thoroughly rocked me. 233 00:07:54,850 --> 00:07:55,998 I've tried everything. 234 00:07:56,649 --> 00:07:57,493 How about now? 235 00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,320 Hold on. I'm Shazam-ing this song. 236 00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:01,181 Oh, for crying out loud! 237 00:08:01,473 --> 00:08:02,573 Guess what I'm worried about? 238 00:08:02,636 --> 00:08:03,747 This sound. 239 00:08:03,797 --> 00:08:04,872 You know what that sound is? 240 00:08:04,911 --> 00:08:07,033 It's the sound of an empty uterus. 241 00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:08,756 I don't need test results to tell me 242 00:08:08,781 --> 00:08:10,500 that it is The Grapes of Wrath in there. 243 00:08:10,626 --> 00:08:11,873 It is 1930s 244 00:08:11,911 --> 00:08:13,579 Dust Bowl in there, Schmidt. 245 00:08:14,015 --> 00:08:15,646 And they're all walking with limps. 246 00:08:15,665 --> 00:08:17,884 I can top that easily. I'm having a hard time 247 00:08:17,898 --> 00:08:19,236 - with my zombie novel. - Oh, not this... 248 00:08:19,260 --> 00:08:22,298 Are you literally comparing a zombie novel 249 00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:24,053 to my ability to create life? 250 00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:26,171 I'm a writer, Jess. We create life. 251 00:08:26,194 --> 00:08:28,235 Ugh! Being a woman sucks! 252 00:08:28,285 --> 00:08:30,056 Preaching to the choir. Women are the worst. 253 00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:32,365 Seriously, can you please stop yelling? 254 00:08:32,437 --> 00:08:33,987 All right, now, it's no big deal, 255 00:08:34,012 --> 00:08:35,575 but I'm on an adjusted schedule. 256 00:08:35,606 --> 00:08:38,086 Sorry about this. Jess has absolutely lost her mind. 257 00:08:38,116 --> 00:08:40,183 - I have not lost my mind! - Yeah, you have. 258 00:08:40,278 --> 00:08:41,449 I'm just scared! 259 00:08:41,486 --> 00:08:43,411 Would you trust me? You're gonna be fine. 260 00:08:43,473 --> 00:08:45,073 You're gonna meet somebody and... 261 00:08:45,098 --> 00:08:46,631 you're gonna fall in love and then... 262 00:08:46,724 --> 00:08:48,459 before you know it, you're gonna... 263 00:08:48,526 --> 00:08:49,826 With who, Nick? 264 00:08:49,894 --> 00:08:52,013 Who's gonna... lay a flag down 265 00:08:52,037 --> 00:08:53,738 on this sweet, sweet continent? 266 00:08:53,762 --> 00:08:56,152 I'll man up. But I must warn you, 267 00:08:56,365 --> 00:08:57,884 Jess-- I don't have sperms. 268 00:08:58,014 --> 00:08:59,139 I have tadpoles. 269 00:08:59,223 --> 00:09:00,123 Of the gods. 270 00:09:00,308 --> 00:09:01,642 That's right. 271 00:09:01,867 --> 00:09:03,398 And I'm gonna give 'em to you. 272 00:09:03,563 --> 00:09:05,415 You can have 'em all, for all I care. 273 00:09:05,533 --> 00:09:06,833 That's how much I love you. 274 00:09:06,878 --> 00:09:08,077 I feel your pain in this situation. 275 00:09:08,208 --> 00:09:09,989 I want you to have babies. Take my sperms. 276 00:09:10,027 --> 00:09:11,803 No. It should be me, Jess. 277 00:09:11,822 --> 00:09:14,051 - What? - With your big, beautiful blue eyes 278 00:09:14,083 --> 00:09:16,818 - and my... Blair Underwood-like skin, - Mm-hmm. 279 00:09:16,847 --> 00:09:19,583 - We'd have the most beautiful baby the world has ever seen. - He's not wrong. 280 00:09:19,688 --> 00:09:21,713 - It could get into any school it wants. - Mm-hmm. 281 00:09:21,744 --> 00:09:25,813 To be clear, I haven't asked any of you to impregnate me. 282 00:09:26,213 --> 00:09:28,082 I think it's important that that's been said. 283 00:09:28,135 --> 00:09:29,636 Good, 'cause it's definitely not me. 284 00:09:29,665 --> 00:09:31,109 Good, 'cause it's definitely not you. 285 00:09:31,139 --> 00:09:34,118 I would love that little baby with all my heart. 286 00:09:34,312 --> 00:09:36,769 Even if I did show it by picking him up from school 287 00:09:36,787 --> 00:09:37,788 in my underwear and... 288 00:09:37,820 --> 00:09:39,651 hitting on the crossing guard. 289 00:09:39,709 --> 00:09:41,246 - How's the zombie novel coming? Good, good, good. 290 00:09:41,270 --> 00:09:42,151 I haven't written a word. 291 00:09:42,389 --> 00:09:43,420 Wait, are you serious? 292 00:09:43,473 --> 00:09:44,754 Nick, it's not that hard, man. 293 00:09:44,778 --> 00:09:46,212 Just sit down and write. 294 00:09:46,555 --> 00:09:47,655 You ain't Hemingway. 295 00:09:47,685 --> 00:09:49,048 - You boys are right. - Mm-hmm. 296 00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:50,690 I got to be more like Hemingway. 297 00:09:50,751 --> 00:09:52,190 I just lost another one of my eggs 298 00:09:52,227 --> 00:09:53,321 while you were comparing yourself 299 00:09:53,354 --> 00:09:54,668 to the most famous writer of all time. 300 00:09:54,692 --> 00:09:56,150 Maybe the reason I have writer's block 301 00:09:56,171 --> 00:09:58,715 is I've been living too casual with you clowns. 302 00:09:58,758 --> 00:10:01,088 I need real-life adventure 303 00:10:01,129 --> 00:10:03,935 like Ernest Hemingway had at my age. 304 00:10:03,996 --> 00:10:05,930 Man, I got to run with the bulls. 305 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:07,854 I got to kill a man with my bare hands 306 00:10:07,885 --> 00:10:09,419 after making sweet love to him 307 00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:11,933 and then sleep on the warm belly of his horse. 308 00:10:11,970 --> 00:10:14,238 I got to eat my way out of a sandwich house! 309 00:10:14,306 --> 00:10:15,520 How much you know about Hemingway? 310 00:10:15,551 --> 00:10:17,683 Not a lot! But I'm gonna learn! 311 00:10:17,768 --> 00:10:19,302 I'm becoming Ernest Hemingway. 312 00:10:19,481 --> 00:10:20,615 You idiots. 313 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:24,888 Schmidt. 314 00:10:25,286 --> 00:10:26,449 Yo. 315 00:10:26,685 --> 00:10:28,151 Okay, Schmidt. 316 00:10:28,181 --> 00:10:29,715 Female pleasure. 317 00:10:31,496 --> 00:10:32,830 Here are some diagrams, 318 00:10:33,423 --> 00:10:35,017 so we can see where you're at. 319 00:10:35,093 --> 00:10:36,060 The vagina. 320 00:10:36,264 --> 00:10:37,381 I'm familiar. 321 00:10:37,839 --> 00:10:39,035 Good. 322 00:10:39,231 --> 00:10:42,285 Now, what I typically do is I start over here, 323 00:10:42,311 --> 00:10:44,244 and then I move here once 324 00:10:44,281 --> 00:10:46,638 I feel confident that this area 325 00:10:46,686 --> 00:10:48,986 - has been taken care of. - Yeah, see, that's exactly what I do. 326 00:10:49,019 --> 00:10:51,521 I call that "Losing Nemo." 327 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:54,936 Well, a more advanced move would be... 328 00:10:54,992 --> 00:10:56,626 You know what? I'll just show you. 329 00:10:56,763 --> 00:10:58,897 It's sort of... Come in this way. 330 00:10:58,965 --> 00:11:00,920 No, no, I see what you're doing. That asymmetry right there? 331 00:11:00,938 --> 00:11:02,751 That's crucial. 'Cause then what I'll do is 332 00:11:02,789 --> 00:11:04,157 is I'll go outside, 333 00:11:05,118 --> 00:11:06,732 get the paper, 334 00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:09,078 and shake the neighbor's hand. 335 00:11:09,141 --> 00:11:10,808 - Interesting. - Then what I'll do is, 336 00:11:10,838 --> 00:11:14,023 I'll tie a bow on it because it's birthday time. 337 00:11:14,054 --> 00:11:16,288 Then I get onstage and collect my Oscar 338 00:11:16,313 --> 00:11:18,024 and say thank you to the people, 339 00:11:18,091 --> 00:11:20,464 thank you to the people, then get back down offstage 340 00:11:20,495 --> 00:11:22,756 and get everybody into the sharing circle, 341 00:11:22,887 --> 00:11:24,713 right down there in the sharing circle, 342 00:11:24,737 --> 00:11:26,038 and then... 343 00:11:26,117 --> 00:11:27,157 spike the volleyball. 344 00:11:27,182 --> 00:11:28,750 Then what I like to do is, I like 345 00:11:28,778 --> 00:11:31,060 to arrive at the bridge, meet the troll, 346 00:11:31,096 --> 00:11:33,596 and then answer his riddles three. 347 00:11:33,663 --> 00:11:34,986 Then what we do is, we're dancing. 348 00:11:35,005 --> 00:11:36,733 We're just gonna dance, we're gonna dance for a while. 349 00:11:36,766 --> 00:11:38,238 We'll dance until you can't dance anymore, 350 00:11:38,282 --> 00:11:40,566 dancing till you can't dance anymore, 351 00:11:40,953 --> 00:11:43,354 and then everybody gets 352 00:11:44,439 --> 00:11:46,142 a churro. 353 00:11:52,363 --> 00:11:53,020 You okay? 354 00:11:53,072 --> 00:11:54,272 Mm-hmm. 355 00:12:00,156 --> 00:12:02,324 It's the baby hormones. 356 00:12:02,354 --> 00:12:04,448 They are not as gay as me. 357 00:12:04,516 --> 00:12:05,976 So I'm good at this, right? 358 00:12:06,019 --> 00:12:09,004 Schmidt, in my professional opinion, 359 00:12:09,031 --> 00:12:11,413 you have definitely earned the rank of-- 360 00:12:11,531 --> 00:12:14,404 and I will use the phrase you coined-- va-genius. 361 00:12:16,080 --> 00:12:18,324 Thank you, thank you so much. 362 00:12:18,349 --> 00:12:20,083 I really needed to hear that, Sadie. 363 00:12:22,010 --> 00:12:23,816 You got to go. 364 00:12:24,042 --> 00:12:25,149 Hey, Winston, 365 00:12:25,177 --> 00:12:26,936 we're going on an adventure! 366 00:12:26,981 --> 00:12:30,050 We need real-life experience like Hemingway. 367 00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:34,044 Whoo, I feel like Hemingway. 368 00:12:34,133 --> 00:12:35,406 This is life experience? 369 00:12:35,438 --> 00:12:37,205 Yeah, the zoo is the best we can do, I told you, 370 00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:38,333 but it's got everything we need. 371 00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:40,877 It's got life, animals, man, beast. 372 00:12:40,914 --> 00:12:42,656 Look, I'm sorry, dude, it's just, you know, 373 00:12:42,681 --> 00:12:44,116 I'm not supposed to be awake right now 374 00:12:44,143 --> 00:12:46,125 - because of my adjusted... - Adjusted schedule, yeah. 375 00:12:46,166 --> 00:12:47,712 Hey, man, 13 minutes of sleep. 376 00:12:47,754 --> 00:12:48,954 Honestly, Nick, seriously, 377 00:12:48,989 --> 00:12:50,464 13 minutes of sleep-- that's all I got. 378 00:12:50,540 --> 00:12:51,915 You're starting to look like a pillow to me. 379 00:12:51,933 --> 00:12:52,926 All I can think of is, like, 380 00:12:52,957 --> 00:12:55,779 "Man, Nick looks exactly like a pillow to me." 381 00:12:56,147 --> 00:12:57,885 - Hmm, what'd you say? - Winston, you need some sleep. 382 00:12:57,915 --> 00:12:59,196 - But I'm out here with you. - Yeah. 383 00:12:59,216 --> 00:13:00,550 - Okay, because I love you. - Thank you. 384 00:13:00,593 --> 00:13:01,943 And I want you to finish your zombie book. 385 00:13:01,968 --> 00:13:03,404 Okay, but check out where we are. 386 00:13:03,435 --> 00:13:04,661 This is experience, 387 00:13:04,692 --> 00:13:06,991 this is what's firing me up to get back to writing. 388 00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:08,321 This is kind of what it's all about. 389 00:13:09,207 --> 00:13:10,338 What are you doing? 390 00:13:10,387 --> 00:13:11,463 It's writer's fuel. 391 00:13:11,522 --> 00:13:13,057 That's what Hemingway said. 392 00:13:14,725 --> 00:13:16,652 Sadie, um, hey. 393 00:13:16,674 --> 00:13:18,246 Uh, I just, I just want you to know 394 00:13:18,264 --> 00:13:20,282 that I am, um, I'm like-- 395 00:13:20,301 --> 00:13:21,998 I am okay with whatever you tell me. 396 00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:23,928 I'm just like, if you say 397 00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:25,969 you've got a year, that's fine. 398 00:13:25,999 --> 00:13:27,680 If you say, like, "You can have kids till you're 80," 399 00:13:27,705 --> 00:13:30,752 that's fine, too. If you say, "You are barren," 400 00:13:31,516 --> 00:13:34,064 um, I'm, I'm okay with that, too. 401 00:13:34,102 --> 00:13:35,132 Um, just, 402 00:13:35,178 --> 00:13:37,379 why am I the only one talking? 403 00:13:37,653 --> 00:13:38,720 Just lay it on me. 404 00:13:38,763 --> 00:13:40,244 What's inside my body? 405 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:41,687 Everything looks good, Jess. 406 00:13:41,732 --> 00:13:43,411 Your hormone levels are outstanding. 407 00:13:43,442 --> 00:13:44,409 - What? - Actually 408 00:13:44,467 --> 00:13:45,935 these are off the charts 409 00:13:45,965 --> 00:13:47,036 for someone your age. 410 00:13:47,061 --> 00:13:48,759 I mean, I don't know how 411 00:13:48,784 --> 00:13:50,584 you're walking around with this many eggs. 412 00:13:50,609 --> 00:13:52,600 ♪ I'm the egg queen ♪ 413 00:13:52,896 --> 00:13:55,364 ♪ I'm queen ♪ ♪ of the eggs. ♪ 414 00:13:56,064 --> 00:13:56,964 Right. 415 00:13:57,032 --> 00:13:58,967 - Cece. - Mm-hmm. 416 00:14:03,363 --> 00:14:06,213 You know what? Maybe we should talk in private. 417 00:14:12,640 --> 00:14:14,907 Cece, Cece. 418 00:14:14,994 --> 00:14:16,761 Cece, wait, do you want to talk? 419 00:14:17,373 --> 00:14:18,814 Jess, you don't get it. 420 00:14:18,852 --> 00:14:20,722 Sadie basically just told me that if I want 421 00:14:20,747 --> 00:14:23,415 to have a kid, I've got to start right now. 422 00:14:23,727 --> 00:14:25,671 Right now. 423 00:14:25,699 --> 00:14:28,361 I thought I had all of this time. 424 00:14:29,212 --> 00:14:31,337 I didn't want to have to think about this. 425 00:14:31,368 --> 00:14:33,836 I know, I know, I'm sorry. 426 00:14:34,351 --> 00:14:35,776 I made you take the test. 427 00:14:35,826 --> 00:14:37,927 What can I do? 428 00:14:38,712 --> 00:14:41,333 Make me a guy so I don't have to worry about this. 429 00:14:44,664 --> 00:14:46,483 You know what? Yes. 430 00:14:46,638 --> 00:14:50,027 Yeah, let's be guys just for today. 431 00:14:50,064 --> 00:14:52,938 Let's, let's care about stupid things, 432 00:14:52,979 --> 00:14:56,114 talk about sharks and sci-fi movies 433 00:14:56,139 --> 00:14:58,705 and making everything wireless. 434 00:14:58,736 --> 00:15:01,347 "Dude, my phone is wireless, my computer is wireless. 435 00:15:01,382 --> 00:15:03,587 - Everything's wireless, yeah." - You're a terrible guy. 436 00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:04,543 "Come on." 437 00:15:05,870 --> 00:15:07,037 No, I'm the best guy. 438 00:15:07,068 --> 00:15:08,636 Come on, come on. 439 00:15:08,971 --> 00:15:09,826 All right. 440 00:15:09,864 --> 00:15:11,298 Okay, how was that? 441 00:15:12,368 --> 00:15:12,881 Eh. 442 00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:14,920 Why, though, with the "eh"? 443 00:15:15,198 --> 00:15:19,088 Unbelie-- but I played out your most secret fantasy: 444 00:15:19,111 --> 00:15:20,905 French maid handyman does... 445 00:15:21,018 --> 00:15:23,570 - Studio 54... - Studio 54 busboy. 446 00:15:23,652 --> 00:15:25,521 - I know, it's disappointing. - I thought I killed it. 447 00:15:25,561 --> 00:15:28,059 And I picked you at work because I heard you were amazing in bed. 448 00:15:28,084 --> 00:15:30,589 I-- no, no, no, I am, okay, I know that I am. 449 00:15:30,613 --> 00:15:33,225 I have it on good authority from my model ex-girlfriend 450 00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:36,269 and an actual lesbian gynecologist 451 00:15:36,398 --> 00:15:40,390 that I know exactly what I'm doing, so it's got to be you. 452 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,586 It's us-- this doesn't work. 453 00:15:42,658 --> 00:15:44,892 When I got divorced I-I, 454 00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:46,197 I thought I could go out there 455 00:15:46,221 --> 00:15:48,777 and have all these new experiences-- 456 00:15:49,038 --> 00:15:52,127 the contract of sex with someone at work 457 00:15:52,157 --> 00:15:54,499 who's so far beneath me, you know, 458 00:15:54,717 --> 00:15:57,477 someone basically just powerless. 459 00:15:57,596 --> 00:16:00,234 I guess I have to feel something. 460 00:16:00,283 --> 00:16:02,019 Okay, see, I'm not like that. 461 00:16:02,044 --> 00:16:03,682 I don't even understand that concept. 462 00:16:03,737 --> 00:16:05,724 My ex-girlfriend the model-- she's a model. 463 00:16:05,748 --> 00:16:07,016 - I know she's a model. - We'd have sex, 464 00:16:07,041 --> 00:16:09,677 and it was just like, I was happy, you know, I, I... 465 00:16:09,750 --> 00:16:12,241 We were connected, I wasn't thinking about anything. 466 00:16:12,278 --> 00:16:14,785 - What is that? - That is love, you idiot. 467 00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:19,578 That's love. 468 00:16:22,110 --> 00:16:23,304 Yuck. 469 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:24,766 - It sucks. - So, what, do I have 470 00:16:24,812 --> 00:16:27,069 to, I have to, like, be in love now to have good sex? 471 00:16:27,099 --> 00:16:29,508 Think about me-- I got to go out in the world 472 00:16:29,546 --> 00:16:31,574 and meet people, date. 473 00:16:31,635 --> 00:16:32,741 You're going to be great. 474 00:16:34,398 --> 00:16:35,975 - You think? - Yeah. 475 00:16:37,004 --> 00:16:39,240 Consider our sex contract void. 476 00:16:40,269 --> 00:16:41,605 How am I gonna get the feathers off? 477 00:16:41,624 --> 00:16:42,951 I have no idea. 478 00:16:44,290 --> 00:16:45,932 Jess and that girl! 479 00:16:45,969 --> 00:16:46,680 Uh... 480 00:16:48,574 --> 00:16:50,798 Oh, I'm so glad they're here. 481 00:16:50,876 --> 00:16:52,516 So you're getting a lot of work done here, huh? 482 00:16:52,541 --> 00:16:54,919 - Who wins-- me versus gorilla? Go. - Gorilla. 483 00:16:54,991 --> 00:16:56,359 Me versus gorilla. 484 00:16:56,427 --> 00:16:58,051 - Gorilla. - No, but in a contest. 485 00:16:58,076 --> 00:16:59,814 - Gorilla. - Yeah, but in a competition. 486 00:16:59,863 --> 00:17:01,419 Uh, gorilla. 487 00:17:01,444 --> 00:17:02,445 You don't get it. 488 00:17:02,513 --> 00:17:04,526 Okay, are you just drunk at the zoo right now? 489 00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:06,398 - Let's go look at snakes. - Okay. 490 00:17:06,510 --> 00:17:07,593 Where are the snakes?! 491 00:17:07,631 --> 00:17:08,897 All day. 492 00:17:09,107 --> 00:17:10,220 You know what? 493 00:17:10,253 --> 00:17:12,054 I don't think we should act like the guys. 494 00:17:12,403 --> 00:17:14,204 Jess, what am I going to do? 495 00:17:19,888 --> 00:17:22,338 What am I going to tell Robby? 496 00:17:22,585 --> 00:17:25,587 You are a Mexican West Coast rattlesnakes, 497 00:17:25,942 --> 00:17:27,831 and they call you "fang-tastic." 498 00:17:29,324 --> 00:17:31,334 No one ever calls me anything like that. 499 00:17:31,371 --> 00:17:33,421 Nick, what are you doing? This is not life experience; 500 00:17:33,462 --> 00:17:35,896 This is procrastination at the zoo. 501 00:17:35,964 --> 00:17:37,644 - I don't think it is. - Now, I need some sleep. 502 00:17:37,675 --> 00:17:38,874 - I got to work tonight. - Okay, 503 00:17:38,899 --> 00:17:41,566 - congratulations, I'm glad you found your passion... - Okay, look... 504 00:17:41,602 --> 00:17:43,036 ...and that you love what you do. 505 00:17:43,055 --> 00:17:44,023 - Wow. - But enough's enough. 506 00:17:44,055 --> 00:17:46,168 - Don't throw it in my face. - Is it like that, is it like that, Nick? 507 00:17:46,202 --> 00:17:47,756 - Don't throw it in my face. - Nick, I got off 508 00:17:47,787 --> 00:17:49,835 - my adjusted schedule... - Don't say "adjusted schedule." 509 00:17:49,847 --> 00:17:51,244 - That's super annoying. - Adjusted schedule. 510 00:17:51,269 --> 00:17:52,678 - Stop saying it. - Adjusted schedule. 511 00:17:52,708 --> 00:17:54,341 You say it again, I'm gonna let the snakes out. 512 00:17:54,378 --> 00:17:56,341 Adjusted schedule. Let the snakes out. 513 00:17:58,027 --> 00:17:59,233 I will let... 514 00:17:59,329 --> 00:18:01,863 - These guys have done a pretty good job keeping it sealed. - Yeah, yeah. 515 00:18:01,931 --> 00:18:03,584 - Nick, you're not a finisher. - Oh, I'm a finisher. 516 00:18:03,609 --> 00:18:04,960 You're not a finisher at all, man. 517 00:18:04,991 --> 00:18:06,837 - That's why you didn't finish law school. - Don't do that. 518 00:18:06,868 --> 00:18:09,154 The same reason you're only three episodes into Downton Abbey. 519 00:18:09,179 --> 00:18:11,582 - There's just too many characters, it's hard to follow. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, 520 00:18:11,613 --> 00:18:14,314 I get it, man, you're scared, and that's okay-- be scared. 521 00:18:14,334 --> 00:18:16,136 Just stop wasting my time because I'm tired 522 00:18:16,167 --> 00:18:18,173 and I need to sleep because I want to work tonight 523 00:18:18,340 --> 00:18:20,009 at the job I'm passionate about. 524 00:18:21,624 --> 00:18:24,058 I'm glad you called me; I love the zoo. 525 00:18:24,488 --> 00:18:26,054 You think I'm like a bear? 526 00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:28,231 I mean, I kind of move like a bear, 527 00:18:28,256 --> 00:18:30,842 and I got that really long, sharp toenail 528 00:18:31,017 --> 00:18:32,567 that you love so much. 529 00:18:36,772 --> 00:18:38,673 Hey. 530 00:18:41,014 --> 00:18:42,514 Randa. 531 00:18:43,262 --> 00:18:44,763 It says here you're 43. 532 00:18:45,323 --> 00:18:46,781 Keeping it tight, girl. 533 00:18:49,339 --> 00:18:50,715 What do you think of kids? 534 00:18:50,855 --> 00:18:51,589 I love kids. 535 00:18:51,633 --> 00:18:53,173 I would like to have children someday. 536 00:18:53,204 --> 00:18:54,669 - Someday? - Well, yeah, 537 00:18:54,693 --> 00:18:56,027 like in ten years or something. 538 00:18:56,065 --> 00:18:57,899 Yeah. 539 00:19:00,437 --> 00:19:01,771 I have a lot of eggs. 540 00:19:02,165 --> 00:19:03,598 Unfortunately 541 00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,475 I don't have a lot of sausage. 542 00:19:07,835 --> 00:19:10,336 Yeah, I shouldn't be complaining. 543 00:19:12,822 --> 00:19:14,855 I'll be okay. 544 00:19:22,988 --> 00:19:24,543 - Hey, Winston. - Aah, what? 545 00:19:24,574 --> 00:19:26,008 Sorry to wake you. 546 00:19:26,117 --> 00:19:27,742 - Z is for Zombie. - What? 547 00:19:27,773 --> 00:19:29,167 I finished my novel. 548 00:19:29,208 --> 00:19:31,109 I stayed up for 14 straight hours. 549 00:19:31,133 --> 00:19:32,653 I even peed in water bottles. 550 00:19:33,384 --> 00:19:34,753 We have a bathroom. 551 00:19:35,577 --> 00:19:37,159 Wow, you dedicated it to me. 552 00:19:37,208 --> 00:19:39,440 "To Winston. Have a nice summer. 553 00:19:39,471 --> 00:19:40,640 Hope to see you ag..." 554 00:19:41,188 --> 00:19:41,890 Really? 555 00:19:41,905 --> 00:19:44,072 I just want to say right now, the black guy dies early-- 556 00:19:44,133 --> 00:19:45,032 his name is William-- 557 00:19:45,062 --> 00:19:47,192 but don't take offense; It's a staple of the genre. 558 00:19:47,748 --> 00:19:49,161 I can't take this-- too much anxiety. 559 00:19:49,179 --> 00:19:50,646 I'm going to my room. 560 00:19:51,881 --> 00:19:53,744 Hey, Winston, are you reading it? 561 00:19:53,794 --> 00:19:54,626 Hey. 562 00:19:54,851 --> 00:19:56,052 Oh, hey. 563 00:19:58,039 --> 00:19:59,107 I knew it. 564 00:19:59,281 --> 00:20:01,282 I knew you'd choose me to get you pregnant. 565 00:20:02,011 --> 00:20:03,855 Yep, let's go. 566 00:20:03,926 --> 00:20:05,126 Jess. 567 00:20:07,731 --> 00:20:08,877 Schmidt. 568 00:20:10,378 --> 00:20:12,129 I think I may have been in love with Cece. 569 00:20:12,157 --> 00:20:13,470 - You are in love with Cece. - You think? 570 00:20:13,503 --> 00:20:15,970 Can't believe I have to have feelings to have good sex. 571 00:20:16,206 --> 00:20:18,270 I was hoping I'd be dead before this happened. 572 00:20:18,325 --> 00:20:19,851 Hey, why are we all hanging out in my room 573 00:20:19,888 --> 00:20:20,629 and sitting on my bed? 574 00:20:20,666 --> 00:20:22,696 Nick, this is 575 00:20:22,795 --> 00:20:25,897 the worst thing I have ever read in my entire life. 576 00:20:25,983 --> 00:20:27,598 You misspelled the word "rhythm" 577 00:20:27,623 --> 00:20:28,420 38 times. 578 00:20:28,441 --> 00:20:30,175 - Z is for Zombie? - Yeah, Z Is for Zombie. 579 00:20:30,218 --> 00:20:31,485 - The zombie novel. - Yeah. 580 00:20:31,552 --> 00:20:32,467 "Rhythm" is a tough word. 581 00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:34,042 - Don't feel bad about that. - Yeah, thanks, man. 582 00:20:34,121 --> 00:20:35,555 - Did you get to the word search? - Yeah. 583 00:20:35,591 --> 00:20:37,851 I put a word search in the novel, 584 00:20:38,510 --> 00:20:39,636 but the joke's on you. 585 00:20:39,673 --> 00:20:41,037 There aren't any words in there, 586 00:20:41,062 --> 00:20:43,203 so you're just gonna be staring at letters, you idiot. 587 00:20:43,228 --> 00:20:45,378 But you know what? You finished it, 588 00:20:45,435 --> 00:20:47,903 and for that, my friend, I'm proud of you. 589 00:20:47,952 --> 00:20:50,091 - Thank you, I did finish it, I finished something. - Yeah, you finished something. 590 00:20:50,138 --> 00:20:51,205 Read it out loud, Winston. 591 00:20:52,554 --> 00:20:53,621 Read it out loud. 592 00:20:53,689 --> 00:20:54,918 Read it out loud. 593 00:20:54,949 --> 00:20:57,435 - Read it out loud... - Okay, I'll read this damn thing; you asked for it. 594 00:20:57,460 --> 00:20:59,461 This might be humiliating. 595 00:20:59,761 --> 00:21:03,086 "No one in the sleepy mountain town of 'Writhe-em' City..." 596 00:21:03,123 --> 00:21:04,224 That's Rhythm City. 597 00:21:04,261 --> 00:21:06,421 "...knew what the meteor meant, but the one thing 598 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:09,799 Mike Jr. did have was a whole lot of 'rittems.'" 599 00:21:09,846 --> 00:21:12,746 - Rhythm. - No, yeah. - "'Whoa, what bit me 600 00:21:12,783 --> 00:21:16,004 in the face?' Mike Jr. said to his dad Mike Sr., who sucks." 601 00:21:16,029 --> 00:21:17,748 Sucks-- Mike Sr. sucks. 602 00:21:17,814 --> 00:21:19,204 It's a major theme throughout this. 603 00:21:19,229 --> 00:21:20,938 "Mike Sr. sucks a whole bunch, 604 00:21:21,002 --> 00:21:22,590 much more than his neighbor Rallo." 605 00:21:22,608 --> 00:21:24,257 Never stop reading this. 606 00:21:24,282 --> 00:21:27,538 "'Zombie zoo, zombie zoo, zombie zoo, zombie zoo. 607 00:21:27,670 --> 00:21:30,806 "'Who let them zombies out that damn zombie zoo? 608 00:21:30,842 --> 00:21:33,012 Uh-oh, watch your back, Laura.'" 609 00:21:33,059 --> 00:21:34,515 And I guess Laura is another character 610 00:21:34,545 --> 00:21:36,209 that he introduces, but that's it. 611 00:21:36,291 --> 00:21:37,540 And here's the word search. 612 00:21:37,563 --> 00:21:39,098 Yeah, good luck, you idiot. 613 00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:45,173 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com Resync for WEB-DL by Norther