1
00:00:17,860 --> 00:00:21,090
NICK: Your hair looks so different.
Well, get used to it, boys.
2
00:00:21,090 --> 00:00:23,490
'Cause we're single, we're sophisticated.
3
00:00:23,530 --> 00:00:26,000
And we just went to a place to get blow-outs.
4
00:00:26,030 --> 00:00:27,100
What's a blow-out?
5
00:00:27,130 --> 00:00:28,460
You know how it's impossible
6
00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:29,970
to make your own hair look amazing?
7
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,970
- Uh, I do not.
- Yeah, you know whose hair I admire?
8
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:33,870
Jesus. Man, dude's hair get overlooked
9
00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:36,040
because of all the miracles and stuff.
10
00:00:36,070 --> 00:00:38,680
So, there's a place that
just blows out your hair?
11
00:00:38,710 --> 00:00:40,040
Well, they wash it first.
12
00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:41,610
So, essentially they create a problem,
13
00:00:41,650 --> 00:00:43,680
and then charge you to fix it.
14
00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:45,850
Here's a, a business idea I just thought of.
15
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:47,320
Why don't I break the heels off your shoe,
16
00:00:47,350 --> 00:00:49,350
and then charge you to glue them back on?
17
00:00:49,390 --> 00:00:51,720
Or, uh, take your sore back and adjust it.
18
00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:54,490
Which would, uh, just make me a chiropractor.
19
00:00:54,530 --> 00:00:55,990
You ladies need to be very careful.
20
00:00:56,030 --> 00:00:58,330
Blow-out can give a woman
too much confidence.
21
00:00:58,360 --> 00:00:59,800
Make them take on things
that they can't handle.
22
00:00:59,830 --> 00:01:00,830
Hillary Clinton.
23
00:01:00,860 --> 00:01:01,900
Oh, hey, Ken. You can just
24
00:01:01,930 --> 00:01:03,200
put the beer behind the bar.
25
00:01:03,230 --> 00:01:04,400
Oh, actually I was coming over here
26
00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,200
to talk to the pretty ladies.
27
00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:07,740
(both laugh)
28
00:01:07,770 --> 00:01:09,010
Nice hair.
29
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:10,070
(both laugh)
30
00:01:10,110 --> 00:01:11,410
(laughs) Hey, Jess.
31
00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:12,680
Hey, Cece.
32
00:01:12,710 --> 00:01:14,680
Bear Claw, hello.
33
00:01:14,710 --> 00:01:16,750
I'd offer you my hand, but it's quite wet.
34
00:01:16,780 --> 00:01:18,250
Still standing close to people.
35
00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:19,480
My building has cable Internet now.
36
00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:20,920
Did you get even prettier?
37
00:01:20,950 --> 00:01:21,990
(laughs): What?
38
00:01:22,020 --> 00:01:23,050
No.
39
00:01:23,090 --> 00:01:24,350
What? No.
40
00:01:24,390 --> 00:01:26,220
What... no.
41
00:01:26,260 --> 00:01:28,730
You and Cece should come to
a party at our place tonight.
42
00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:30,030
I live with Ken.
43
00:01:30,060 --> 00:01:31,230
Ken played football in college.
44
00:01:31,260 --> 00:01:32,600
Do a football thing, Ken!
45
00:01:32,630 --> 00:01:33,730
I'm kidding, Ken.
46
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,000
Nobody wants to see that garbage.
47
00:01:36,030 --> 00:01:38,170
Anyway, gonna be some cool people there.
48
00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:39,570
We know twin architects.
49
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:40,870
Yeah, they're... brothers.
50
00:01:40,910 --> 00:01:42,040
Ken, what did we talk about?!
51
00:01:42,070 --> 00:01:43,040
Huh?
52
00:01:43,070 --> 00:01:44,110
Some people understand things
53
00:01:44,140 --> 00:01:45,210
that don't come
54
00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:46,880
quite naturally to your brain!
55
00:01:46,910 --> 00:01:48,510
Stupid dum-dum.
56
00:01:48,550 --> 00:01:50,210
Stay out of this. You guys want to come?
57
00:01:50,250 --> 00:01:52,680
- Um, could you excuse us for a second?
- Yeah.
58
00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:55,720
You played that all wrong, you stupid idiot.
59
00:01:55,750 --> 00:01:57,850
Cece, I know these guys are weird, but
60
00:01:57,890 --> 00:02:00,960
parties have cute guys who aren't Schmidt.
61
00:02:00,990 --> 00:02:03,130
What did Charisma say while
he was washing our hair?
62
00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:04,430
He said he was worried about Taylor Swift
63
00:02:04,460 --> 00:02:06,300
living in New York all alone.
64
00:02:06,330 --> 00:02:08,100
Well, yeah, we all are, but he also said
65
00:02:08,130 --> 00:02:09,970
that we need to embrace our freedom.
66
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,870
We're single. We can do whatever we want!
67
00:02:11,900 --> 00:02:14,370
The only thing stopping us is us.
68
00:02:14,410 --> 00:02:18,110
And Charisma made us promise
not to waste these blow-outs.
69
00:02:18,140 --> 00:02:20,640
Our hair does look so good right now.
70
00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:22,250
Let's do this! Let's go to this party!
71
00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:25,150
Let's see where this journey takes us!
72
00:02:25,180 --> 00:02:27,180
(birds chirping)
73
00:02:28,290 --> 00:02:30,450
Good morning.
74
00:02:31,820 --> 00:02:33,320
Hi.
75
00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,760
Do you want to hear a funny story?
76
00:02:35,790 --> 00:02:37,560
This green pillow over here,
77
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:41,100
I always use it in between my legs
78
00:02:41,130 --> 00:02:44,130
like a... like a second person.
79
00:02:44,170 --> 00:02:46,300
But it found its proper home
80
00:02:46,340 --> 00:02:48,340
underneath your head today.
81
00:03:03,870 --> 00:03:06,240
(both laugh) MAN: Hey, hey... mamma Mia!
82
00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:08,400
He slipped in the sauce. Bookmark this one.
83
00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:10,040
Coach, get in here! We're watching videos
84
00:03:10,070 --> 00:03:12,080
of Italians falling down.
85
00:03:12,110 --> 00:03:13,680
Oh, he's on a jog with May. You know, I think
86
00:03:13,710 --> 00:03:15,350
he might've met his match with that one.
87
00:03:15,380 --> 00:03:17,110
Rumor has it they haven't even kissed yet.
88
00:03:17,150 --> 00:03:18,780
What was all that noise in their room
89
00:03:18,820 --> 00:03:20,280
- if they haven't kissed yet?
- That's weird.
90
00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:22,290
Stop listening by everybody's rooms
91
00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,420
for sex sounds, Winston. (laughs)
92
00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:26,090
Listen, if I'm not getting it, Hey! Hey!
93
00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:27,760
I want to make sure
everybody else is getting it.
94
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:29,290
Winston, I mean it, man.
95
00:03:29,330 --> 00:03:31,390
Good morning!
96
00:03:31,430 --> 00:03:33,130
I, uh, I believe you all know May.
97
00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:35,230
- Hi.
- If you'd like to exchange pleasantries,
98
00:03:35,270 --> 00:03:36,900
please do so now, as she as on her way out.
99
00:03:36,930 --> 00:03:38,270
Why are you talking like
100
00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:40,600
you're high and I'm your dad?
101
00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:42,640
Sorry I can't stay. I'm
performing at a benefit today.
102
00:03:42,670 --> 00:03:43,540
Oh. I'm playing
103
00:03:43,570 --> 00:03:45,240
Bach's "Cello Suite No. 1,"
104
00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:47,110
and all I have left to learn is
105
00:03:47,140 --> 00:03:49,110
the cadenza movement, so it's...
106
00:03:49,150 --> 00:03:50,950
Well, at least it's not the saraband.
107
00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:52,320
Oh! Oh, my God! (laughing)
108
00:03:52,350 --> 00:03:54,650
Right? I get this.
109
00:03:54,690 --> 00:03:56,650
That's crazy.
110
00:03:56,690 --> 00:03:58,320
Hey, you guys should come.
111
00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:00,990
Yeah, it's at an art gallery.
112
00:04:01,030 --> 00:04:02,830
Yeah, yeah. I-I think I speak for everyone
113
00:04:02,860 --> 00:04:04,730
when I say absolutmont.
114
00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:07,300
(laughter)
115
00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:10,930
Something about Italians on their asses, man.
116
00:04:14,870 --> 00:04:16,810
BOTH (gasp): Oh, my God!
117
00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:20,010
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
118
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:21,510
You have stickers
119
00:04:21,550 --> 00:04:23,510
on your neck. (groans)
120
00:04:23,550 --> 00:04:24,850
Ow!
121
00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:26,680
"The man, the legend"?
122
00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:28,120
Wouldn't that mean he has no penis at all?
123
00:04:28,150 --> 00:04:29,150
Look, I had no choice, okay?
124
00:04:29,190 --> 00:04:30,190
He's sleeping on my shirt.
125
00:04:30,220 --> 00:04:32,260
We need to go! Walk of shame!
126
00:04:32,290 --> 00:04:33,860
Let's make a move...
127
00:04:33,890 --> 00:04:36,130
Wait, a minute. Why do
women have to have a label
128
00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:38,330
for going home in the morning
129
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:40,630
when for men it's just... going home.
130
00:04:40,660 --> 00:04:42,000
Why don't we just call ourselves what we are?
131
00:04:42,030 --> 00:04:43,800
Two respectable women...
132
00:04:43,830 --> 00:04:46,040
rushing to their car.
133
00:04:46,070 --> 00:04:47,100
Great.
134
00:04:47,140 --> 00:04:48,810
- Aah!
- Aah!
135
00:04:48,840 --> 00:04:50,140
Oh!
136
00:04:50,170 --> 00:04:52,810
The sun! Hellfire!
137
00:04:52,840 --> 00:04:55,610
Where's the car? Where's my car?
138
00:04:55,650 --> 00:04:58,480
- No, no! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
- No! No! No, no, no, no!
139
00:04:58,520 --> 00:04:59,850
- No, no, no, no, no!
- No, no, no!
140
00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:00,980
What are we gonna do?
141
00:05:01,020 --> 00:05:02,690
My phone's dead.
142
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:04,520
My phone is dead, too.
143
00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:06,190
I have no cash. Now, what are we gonna do?
144
00:05:06,220 --> 00:05:07,220
Are we gonna walk?
145
00:05:07,260 --> 00:05:09,030
My feet are wrecked, okay?
146
00:05:09,060 --> 00:05:10,360
And carrying shoes?
147
00:05:10,390 --> 00:05:12,860
That's legit walk of shame.
148
00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:14,130
Please stop saying "walk of shame."
149
00:05:14,170 --> 00:05:15,330
Also "legit."
150
00:05:15,370 --> 00:05:17,570
Not crazy about that word, either.
151
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:19,970
If that South African runner
who killed his girlfriend
152
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,210
can run with no legs,
153
00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:24,840
we can walk in heels.
154
00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:26,510
CECE: Excuse you!
155
00:05:26,540 --> 00:05:28,810
Those little bitches throwing us shade? Hey!
156
00:05:28,850 --> 00:05:30,750
Keep it moving! (both laugh)
157
00:05:30,780 --> 00:05:33,050
This is a middle school vice principal
158
00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:35,190
and can give both of you detention.
159
00:05:35,220 --> 00:05:36,420
JESS: Hey, would one of you let us
160
00:05:36,450 --> 00:05:38,890
use your phone in exchange for...
161
00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:40,090
- Cece?
- What? Mm-hmm.
162
00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:41,760
Cheese and a condom?
163
00:05:41,790 --> 00:05:43,260
It's for emergencies.
164
00:05:44,830 --> 00:05:47,060
Do you think Nick and Winston
should come to May's thing?
165
00:05:47,100 --> 00:05:48,100
No.
166
00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:49,230
I mean, I'm so freaked out
167
00:05:49,270 --> 00:05:50,500
that they're gonna embarrass me.
168
00:05:50,530 --> 00:05:51,570
I'm barely holding my own
169
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:52,700
with May's friends as it is.
170
00:05:52,740 --> 00:05:54,740
It's always Neo-romanticism
171
00:05:54,770 --> 00:05:56,240
with that guy... like Rihm,
172
00:05:56,270 --> 00:05:58,210
Rochberg, Zwilich.
173
00:05:58,240 --> 00:05:59,840
You know what song I find Neo-romantic?
174
00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,750
(humming Johnny Pearson's "Heavy Action")
175
00:06:04,820 --> 00:06:07,420
It's Monday Night Football?
176
00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:08,920
Uh...
177
00:06:08,950 --> 00:06:11,590
Why is it, like, weird right now?
178
00:06:11,620 --> 00:06:13,720
It's a good thing that I'm coming with you.
179
00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:15,730
I know a ton about classical music.
180
00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:17,930
I played the ghost of
Rachmaninoff in a loosely based
181
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:19,930
high school production of Shine.
182
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,230
Now, do you think I'm crazy
for, like, thinking like that?
183
00:06:22,270 --> 00:06:24,370
Like, what do you think about
Nick and Winston coming?
184
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:26,240
You know, I brought Nick
to a work dinner once.
185
00:06:26,270 --> 00:06:27,870
(whoops) That was fun!
186
00:06:27,910 --> 00:06:29,710
Now, that place was fancy.
187
00:06:29,740 --> 00:06:31,440
(groans)
188
00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:32,640
(grunts)
189
00:06:32,680 --> 00:06:33,880
Vest without a shirt?
190
00:06:33,910 --> 00:06:35,580
I mean, it's a clean look.
191
00:06:35,610 --> 00:06:37,580
It's just not for that
occasion. You-you don't think
192
00:06:37,620 --> 00:06:39,480
we should tell them not
to come, though, right?
193
00:06:39,520 --> 00:06:40,750
I think we can tell them whatever we want.
194
00:06:40,790 --> 00:06:42,120
Oh, hey, hey. And then...
195
00:06:42,150 --> 00:06:44,120
so, that's, it's his side.
196
00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:45,260
Hey, Nick!
197
00:06:45,290 --> 00:06:47,990
(sputters)
198
00:06:48,030 --> 00:06:50,260
What's up, man?
199
00:07:01,310 --> 00:07:03,640
Nick, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up!
200
00:07:03,670 --> 00:07:05,110
MALE VOICE: The voice mailbox for...
201
00:07:05,140 --> 00:07:06,410
NICK: Penis Wilson.
202
00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:08,240
MALE VOICE: is full. Good-bye.
203
00:07:08,280 --> 00:07:09,950
And there it is.
204
00:07:09,980 --> 00:07:12,680
All the numbers I know by heart.
205
00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:14,150
That's more than me.
206
00:07:14,190 --> 00:07:15,490
Learn from us.
207
00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:17,690
Also, never open a line of credit
208
00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:20,860
for your boyfriend no matter
how talented of an artist he is.
209
00:07:20,890 --> 00:07:23,460
Uh, we are walking.
210
00:07:23,490 --> 00:07:25,300
We're walking.
211
00:07:25,330 --> 00:07:27,200
CECE: All right.
212
00:07:27,230 --> 00:07:30,270
This is a legit walk of shame.
213
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:31,870
Oh, yeah. (car horn honks)
214
00:07:31,900 --> 00:07:33,640
Rough start, ladies!
215
00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:34,900
It was the blow-out.
216
00:07:35,910 --> 00:07:37,670
It was the blow-out.
217
00:07:37,710 --> 00:07:39,880
It's gonna be okay. Come on, let's go.
218
00:07:41,970 --> 00:07:44,660
Oh, my God, they look so comfy.
219
00:07:44,690 --> 00:07:46,430
Okay, you got it, okay? You got it.
220
00:07:46,460 --> 00:07:48,960
Just give it a good... (grunts)
221
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,930
Oh, God, I need those sneakers.
222
00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:52,160
Ooh!
223
00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:53,600
So close, so close.
224
00:07:53,630 --> 00:07:54,830
You got it on this one,
you got it, you got it.
225
00:07:54,870 --> 00:07:56,100
Yeah.
226
00:07:56,140 --> 00:07:57,340
(screams)
227
00:07:57,370 --> 00:07:59,810
No! No!
228
00:08:02,810 --> 00:08:05,340
Let's follow that train.
229
00:08:05,380 --> 00:08:09,450
JESS: Look at it, just sitting
there, so full and so watery.
230
00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:10,720
If we steal that water,
231
00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:11,980
are we criminals?
232
00:08:12,020 --> 00:08:13,290
If we cross this fence,
233
00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:14,820
are we crossing a line that we can never...?
234
00:08:14,860 --> 00:08:16,390
Shut up, we are going in.
235
00:08:18,860 --> 00:08:20,630
WINSTON: Makes sense.
236
00:08:20,660 --> 00:08:22,030
Ugh, I can't believe we have to go
237
00:08:22,060 --> 00:08:23,500
to that stupid music thing.
238
00:08:23,530 --> 00:08:24,700
I just found these two-for-one
239
00:08:24,730 --> 00:08:26,170
coupons to the water park.
240
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:28,030
- Wow.
- They reopened the wave pool
241
00:08:28,070 --> 00:08:30,140
because it's been two years to
the day since that guy died.
242
00:08:30,170 --> 00:08:32,000
- R.I.P. Mike Beakman.
- SCHMIDT: All right, you know what?
243
00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:33,640
I'll... I'll take one for the team.
244
00:08:33,670 --> 00:08:35,240
You guys go to the water park,
245
00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:36,680
- and I'll go with Coach.
- COACH: Really?
246
00:08:36,710 --> 00:08:37,910
My eyes react poorly
247
00:08:37,940 --> 00:08:39,410
to children's urine anyway.
248
00:08:39,450 --> 00:08:41,810
- Don't ask me how I know that.
- Sweet.
249
00:08:41,850 --> 00:08:43,220
You guys are gonna have
so much fun without us.
250
00:08:43,250 --> 00:08:44,750
- Yeah, come on, Coach.
- Man...
251
00:08:44,790 --> 00:08:46,650
Let's go put on our most
scrotum-crushing trousers.
252
00:08:46,690 --> 00:08:48,320
Thanks a lot, guys.
253
00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:49,560
(chuckles)
254
00:08:49,590 --> 00:08:50,990
Those lousy serpents.
255
00:08:51,020 --> 00:08:52,760
They don't want us to come.
256
00:08:52,790 --> 00:08:54,890
Damn lousy serpents.
257
00:08:54,930 --> 00:08:56,160
(hissing)
258
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:57,430
They must think we're stupid.
259
00:08:57,460 --> 00:08:59,060
- I don't want to go...
- Mm-hmm.
260
00:08:59,100 --> 00:09:00,500
But I don't like the idea of not going
261
00:09:00,530 --> 00:09:02,370
because they don't want us to go,
262
00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:04,700
rather than not going
because we don't want to go.
263
00:09:04,740 --> 00:09:06,340
That's right, 'cause if we
don't go, then who gonna go
264
00:09:06,370 --> 00:09:07,910
when we don't want to, 'cause we go.
265
00:09:07,940 --> 00:09:09,940
Right? Rewind.
266
00:09:09,980 --> 00:09:12,450
- Come on, I'm being very clear here.
- Where are we going and why?
267
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:14,450
We're going everywhere for both reasons.
268
00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:15,950
(hissing)
269
00:09:15,980 --> 00:09:17,850
How do you do it so smooth?
270
00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:19,750
(hisses) Just... (hisses) ...exhale.
271
00:09:19,790 --> 00:09:22,290
(stuttering hiss)
272
00:09:22,320 --> 00:09:23,020
(smooth hiss)
273
00:09:23,060 --> 00:09:24,590
(stuttering hiss)
274
00:09:24,620 --> 00:09:26,430
I just can't do it. I
don't even care about it.
275
00:09:26,460 --> 00:09:28,360
Just gonna...
276
00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:29,600
Oh, that's heavy.
277
00:09:29,630 --> 00:09:31,260
- Yeah.
- Okay.
278
00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:32,900
Let's just knock it over.
Push it ov... push it.
279
00:09:32,930 --> 00:09:34,530
- Push, push...
- Go.
280
00:09:34,570 --> 00:09:35,770
Oh! Fall back,
281
00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:37,300
fall back, fall back, fall back.
282
00:09:39,310 --> 00:09:40,770
We're trapped.
283
00:09:40,810 --> 00:09:43,310
Now what? Wait until the kid's party's over?
284
00:09:43,340 --> 00:09:46,580
Kids unwrap presents so slowly.
285
00:09:46,610 --> 00:09:48,150
I know. Kids are so slow.
286
00:09:48,180 --> 00:09:49,750
I think this is rock bottom.
287
00:09:49,780 --> 00:09:51,120
Cece...
288
00:09:51,150 --> 00:09:54,620
I have to tell you something embarrassing.
289
00:09:54,650 --> 00:09:55,590
What?
290
00:09:55,620 --> 00:09:57,160
I didn't sleep
291
00:09:57,190 --> 00:09:59,290
with Bear Claw last night.
292
00:09:59,330 --> 00:10:01,860
I did something even worse.
293
00:10:02,830 --> 00:10:04,060
We made up a musical
294
00:10:04,100 --> 00:10:05,260
about woodland creatures.
295
00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:07,330
♪ Owls and squirrels and deer ♪
296
00:10:07,370 --> 00:10:09,300
- ♪ Raccoon and caribou ♪
- ♪ And otters ♪
297
00:10:09,340 --> 00:10:11,900
♪ Get out of here, you're not welcome ♪
298
00:10:11,940 --> 00:10:13,670
- ♪ Get out of here ♪
- ♪ Get out of here ♪
299
00:10:13,710 --> 00:10:15,240
♪ Caribou, caribou... ♪
300
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:16,740
(laughing) It's true.
301
00:10:16,780 --> 00:10:18,010
Heh.
302
00:10:18,050 --> 00:10:19,610
Why did you make it seem like...
303
00:10:19,650 --> 00:10:21,310
Because I didn't have a one-night stand
304
00:10:21,350 --> 00:10:22,650
like a normal woman.
305
00:10:22,680 --> 00:10:23,850
I stayed up all night
306
00:10:23,880 --> 00:10:25,750
pretending to be a singing tree.
307
00:10:25,790 --> 00:10:28,120
♪ I'm just a dumb old tree ♪
308
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:30,360
♪ You're not, take it back ♪
309
00:10:30,390 --> 00:10:33,290
♪ Nobody ever pets me-e-e-e ♪
310
00:10:33,330 --> 00:10:34,790
♪ 'Cause you're just a tree ♪
311
00:10:34,830 --> 00:10:36,660
♪ They just eat my nuts ♪
312
00:10:36,700 --> 00:10:42,840
♪ Eat my nuts, eat my nuts. ♪
313
00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:48,970
You're right. That is way more shameful.
314
00:10:49,010 --> 00:10:50,310
(giggles weakly) All right.
315
00:10:50,340 --> 00:10:52,110
Confession.
316
00:10:52,150 --> 00:10:54,250
I did not sleep with Ken, either.
317
00:10:55,150 --> 00:10:56,350
Yeah, we started hooking up
318
00:10:56,380 --> 00:10:57,620
and then I called him... Schmidt.
319
00:10:57,650 --> 00:10:58,650
That's okay. It happens.
320
00:10:58,690 --> 00:10:59,790
- Twice.
- Whatever.
321
00:10:59,820 --> 00:11:01,790
- Four times.
- Okay, that's bad.
322
00:11:01,820 --> 00:11:03,290
I know, I felt so bad afterwards,
323
00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:04,760
I straightened up his room.
324
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:07,290
I am a grown woman
325
00:11:07,330 --> 00:11:09,460
that is in love with her ex-boyfriend
326
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:12,330
that has a girlfriend.
327
00:11:12,370 --> 00:11:14,970
And I've been stealing my neighbor's Wi-Fi.
328
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,740
I mean, what have I become?
329
00:11:16,770 --> 00:11:20,840
This day is about to turn around.
330
00:11:26,950 --> 00:11:28,210
Wait.
331
00:11:33,350 --> 00:11:34,550
Coach.
332
00:11:34,590 --> 00:11:35,820
What?
333
00:11:35,860 --> 00:11:37,160
Just-just put it in your pocket.
334
00:11:37,190 --> 00:11:38,420
No, dude. It had pork belly on it.
335
00:11:38,460 --> 00:11:40,390
Just put it in your pocket. Do it.
336
00:11:40,430 --> 00:11:42,400
I used to play the violin.
337
00:11:42,430 --> 00:11:44,360
Then I became a real musician.
338
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,370
(laughs)
339
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:47,670
Because your instrument's bigger, right?
340
00:11:47,700 --> 00:11:48,530
(chuckles)
341
00:11:48,570 --> 00:11:50,200
Cello knowledge.
342
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:51,400
Yeah.
343
00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:53,170
(whispering): The cello is bigger.
344
00:11:53,210 --> 00:11:55,210
- Nice.
- (Nick and Winston laughing)
345
00:11:56,710 --> 00:11:59,010
- The hell are they doing here?
- I don't know.
346
00:11:59,050 --> 00:12:00,950
They're drinking at a normal pace.
347
00:12:00,980 --> 00:12:03,250
There's nothing stuck to them.
348
00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:04,750
Exactly.
349
00:12:04,790 --> 00:12:06,150
The hell are they up to?
350
00:12:08,220 --> 00:12:10,390
You are a genius.
351
00:12:10,420 --> 00:12:12,090
Sweet, sweet city water.
352
00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:14,730
Okay. You know how today's been
353
00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:16,130
kind of like a-a crappy day?
354
00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:16,930
Mm-hmm.
355
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:18,430
Well, how would you feel
356
00:12:18,470 --> 00:12:20,930
if that hose belonged to your ex-boyfriend?
357
00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:23,470
Jess?
358
00:12:26,470 --> 00:12:29,140
Genzlinger!
359
00:12:29,180 --> 00:12:31,480
Hey! Uh...
360
00:12:31,510 --> 00:12:32,950
Blast from the past!
361
00:12:32,980 --> 00:12:34,250
How's that ass?
362
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,750
That ass is good.
363
00:12:36,780 --> 00:12:37,950
I don't know if that's an expression, but...
364
00:12:37,990 --> 00:12:39,720
How the heck are you?
365
00:12:39,750 --> 00:12:42,050
Good. How... Oop.
366
00:12:42,090 --> 00:12:44,760
Heh. Don't know why I did that.
367
00:12:44,790 --> 00:12:46,030
Did it again. I don't know why.
368
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,870
Why you guys dressed up all nice? Huh?
369
00:12:51,900 --> 00:12:54,140
Talking all polite and
stuff. What-What's going on?
370
00:12:54,170 --> 00:12:56,610
Oh, we're just here for the culture
371
00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:58,640
- and, uh, the spectacle of it all.
- Really?
372
00:12:58,680 --> 00:13:00,880
And to make you look like
a stupid piece of crap
373
00:13:00,910 --> 00:13:03,450
for thinking we'd be an embarrassment to you.
374
00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:04,580
I'm patting you down.
375
00:13:04,620 --> 00:13:05,980
- Hey.
- I'm an American citizen.
376
00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:07,380
I request a female if you're gonna do that.
377
00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:08,990
Stop it. Stop.
378
00:13:09,020 --> 00:13:10,220
- Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
- Ah, ah.
379
00:13:10,250 --> 00:13:11,620
- Get your paws off of me.
- I feel something!
380
00:13:11,660 --> 00:13:12,990
- I feel something!
- Show some class, Coach.
381
00:13:13,020 --> 00:13:13,960
NICK: Get your paws
382
00:13:13,990 --> 00:13:16,060
- off of me!
- Ow!
383
00:13:16,090 --> 00:13:18,400
Toothpick in my leg! (descending notes)
384
00:13:18,430 --> 00:13:20,430
Oh, dip.
385
00:13:20,470 --> 00:13:21,970
Ernie!
386
00:13:23,670 --> 00:13:25,500
Please apologize to Frondi.
387
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:28,340
The flautist.
388
00:13:28,370 --> 00:13:29,670
Uh...
389
00:13:29,710 --> 00:13:30,810
The flute player.
390
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:32,010
Oh.
391
00:13:33,310 --> 00:13:34,850
Sorry, Frondi.
392
00:13:35,980 --> 00:13:38,480
I should go.
393
00:13:41,790 --> 00:13:43,590
We'll take care of the
charges and the damages.
394
00:13:43,620 --> 00:13:45,490
- We'll spare no expense.
- No, we will not. No, we will not.
395
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,490
- We will spare no expense.
- No, we will not.
396
00:13:47,530 --> 00:13:49,690
So, yeah, I got promoted to Vice Principal.
397
00:13:49,730 --> 00:13:50,990
- VP.
- Great.
398
00:13:51,030 --> 00:13:52,630
I have a bottle of soy sauce on my desk,
399
00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:54,200
so no more packets for me.
400
00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:56,100
Hey, you got a little
roly poly bug on you, hmm?
401
00:13:56,130 --> 00:13:57,870
Oh...
402
00:13:57,900 --> 00:14:00,300
- I get it.
- What?
403
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:01,810
I wasn't born yesterday!
404
00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:03,540
You think we're on a walk of shame.
405
00:14:03,570 --> 00:14:04,940
Didn't, but...
406
00:14:04,980 --> 00:14:06,710
Congratulations.
407
00:14:06,740 --> 00:14:09,210
You spend your Sundays having cupcake parties
408
00:14:09,250 --> 00:14:10,850
at your beautiful house with your cute little
409
00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:13,180
half-Asian kid and your daddy diaper bag...
410
00:14:13,220 --> 00:14:15,450
I think someone might need a
visit from the "rest police."
411
00:14:15,490 --> 00:14:16,690
Just because I don't have a husband
412
00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:18,160
or a baby or a house
413
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:19,820
doesn't mean I'm not living right.
414
00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:21,690
We're still growing and changing.
415
00:14:21,730 --> 00:14:23,130
- Yeah.
- And that's a good thing.
416
00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:24,730
Look at this hair.
417
00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:26,460
This is single-girl hair.
418
00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:28,200
This is adventure hair.
419
00:14:28,230 --> 00:14:31,840
This isn't boring, married, settled hair.
420
00:14:31,870 --> 00:14:33,840
This is... this is fun.
421
00:14:33,870 --> 00:14:34,910
We're fun.
422
00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:36,710
You know what I did last night?
423
00:14:36,740 --> 00:14:38,880
I got totally obliterated,
424
00:14:38,910 --> 00:14:42,510
and I made up a musical fable
with a guy named Bear Claw,
425
00:14:42,550 --> 00:14:44,510
and it was better than sex.
426
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:46,920
♪ I'm a little fox,
but I'm not that sly ♪
427
00:14:46,950 --> 00:14:48,350
♪ What can I say? ♪
428
00:14:48,390 --> 00:14:49,890
♪ I'm an honest little guy. ♪
429
00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,320
Well, I'm glad things are good...
430
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:54,520
You know what, Genzlinger?
431
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,160
I don't care what you think of me.
432
00:14:56,190 --> 00:14:57,360
'Cause this is my journey.
433
00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:59,360
Welcome to my freaking journey.
434
00:14:59,400 --> 00:15:01,100
Great, I wish you luck...
435
00:15:01,130 --> 00:15:02,100
You ready?
436
00:15:02,130 --> 00:15:04,200
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
437
00:15:05,870 --> 00:15:07,440
That's not Jenn.
438
00:15:08,910 --> 00:15:09,870
(sighs)
439
00:15:09,910 --> 00:15:11,710
Nope.
440
00:15:11,740 --> 00:15:13,380
This is not my house, okay?
441
00:15:13,410 --> 00:15:15,210
This is not a daddy diaper bag,
442
00:15:15,250 --> 00:15:17,850
This is a bag of sadness.
443
00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:20,850
Because I am a party clown. (squeaks)
444
00:15:20,890 --> 00:15:22,890
I'm actually a musical party clown, okay?
445
00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:27,860
So no one's had a more shameful
walk this morning than me.
446
00:15:27,890 --> 00:15:29,930
(squeaks)
447
00:15:32,260 --> 00:15:33,460
What happened to Jenn?
448
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:34,600
Thanks for bringing that up.
449
00:15:34,630 --> 00:15:35,600
Salt in the wound.
450
00:15:35,630 --> 00:15:36,600
She left me.
451
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:37,770
You know what I did last night?
452
00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:38,940
I'm gonna tell you.
453
00:15:38,970 --> 00:15:40,800
I masturbated to pornography
454
00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:44,270
that I had to draw on
the back of an envelope.
455
00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:45,540
(chuckles) Mmm.
456
00:15:45,580 --> 00:15:47,950
- He's great with kids.
- Who are you?
457
00:15:47,980 --> 00:15:49,950
I'm a Liza Minnelli impersonator.
458
00:15:49,980 --> 00:15:51,780
♪ Ah... ♪
459
00:15:51,820 --> 00:15:52,950
So...
460
00:15:56,820 --> 00:15:58,660
Ah, guys, look, I don't see much
461
00:15:58,690 --> 00:16:00,320
of the toothpick coming out.
462
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:01,930
So, best move...
463
00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:04,260
Push it all the way in, and
get it from the other side.
464
00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:05,500
Am I right? You guys agree?
465
00:16:05,530 --> 00:16:07,160
How could you guys do this to me?
466
00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:08,400
NICK: We didn't do anything.
467
00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:09,470
You embarrassed yourself.
468
00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:10,900
Actually, you embarrassed us.
469
00:16:10,940 --> 00:16:12,570
And you do it all the time, Coach.
470
00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:15,010
Like how you sit on the hood of your car
471
00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:17,240
when you pump gas into it.
472
00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:19,080
I mean, what, are you in
Dukes of Hazzard, you idiot?
473
00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:21,850
I saw Isaiah Thomas do it on a
poster once, and it was cool.
474
00:16:21,880 --> 00:16:23,350
And what are you laughing at, all right?
475
00:16:23,380 --> 00:16:25,420
- What?
- You put ChapStick on like a little girl
476
00:16:25,450 --> 00:16:27,020
putting on lipstick for the first time.
477
00:16:27,050 --> 00:16:29,750
(chuckling): It's way too much puckering.
478
00:16:29,790 --> 00:16:31,860
- Winston, you know what, you shut up.
- Cold busted.
479
00:16:31,890 --> 00:16:33,690
You're the most embarrassing
one of our friends by far.
480
00:16:33,730 --> 00:16:35,290
- With your singing.
- Outfits. - And the crystals.
481
00:16:35,330 --> 00:16:36,830
- Your mural.
- The mustache. - Your fauxhawk.
482
00:16:36,860 --> 00:16:38,460
- Your bell.
- Puzzles. - Cat.
483
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:41,470
FYI... you guys live with the cat, too.
484
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:43,600
But at least I get to reap the benefits.
485
00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:44,800
(chuckles)
486
00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:46,240
That... (door opens)
487
00:16:48,310 --> 00:16:50,110
- Ah.
- (chuckling): Oh, oh.
488
00:16:50,140 --> 00:16:52,110
Look, it's not what it looks like, my man.
489
00:16:52,140 --> 00:16:54,510
Um, we're just trying to squeeze
something out of my buddy.
490
00:16:54,550 --> 00:16:55,510
We'll be done when it comes out.
491
00:16:55,550 --> 00:16:56,810
(clicks tongue)
492
00:16:58,820 --> 00:17:00,350
COACH: Well, maybe it's
not gonna work with May.
493
00:17:00,390 --> 00:17:02,350
She's too good for me.
494
00:17:02,390 --> 00:17:04,350
I should just go back to having soulless sex
495
00:17:04,390 --> 00:17:06,290
with beautiful women I share
no emotional connection...
496
00:17:06,320 --> 00:17:07,720
(shouts) Oh!
497
00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:08,860
All my hard work.
498
00:17:08,890 --> 00:17:10,160
May didn't start liking you
499
00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:12,160
because you play some dumb instrument.
500
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,530
She started liking you because you're cocky.
501
00:17:14,570 --> 00:17:16,030
And you're funny.
502
00:17:16,070 --> 00:17:17,500
What, you're afraid of her
503
00:17:17,540 --> 00:17:19,300
because she plays the standing-up guitar?
504
00:17:19,340 --> 00:17:21,210
He's right, Coach, I don't
know why we're trying so hard
505
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:22,470
to make you fit in here.
506
00:17:22,510 --> 00:17:23,510
You're Coach,
507
00:17:23,540 --> 00:17:25,410
- sex in a sweat suit.
- Yeah.
508
00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,980
If I've tought you one thing,
it's lead out with confidence.
509
00:17:28,010 --> 00:17:30,380
Follow up with comedy.
510
00:17:30,420 --> 00:17:33,380
And number trey, your
home run, your triple...
511
00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:35,020
Have great looks.
512
00:17:35,050 --> 00:17:37,320
I got 'em, and I passed them on to you.
513
00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:39,890
So get out there, you beautiful peacock.
514
00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:42,230
Shake your tail feathers.
515
00:17:42,260 --> 00:17:44,660
I mean, I'd rather not get these
compliments with my pants down,
516
00:17:44,700 --> 00:17:46,400
but appreciate it.
517
00:17:46,430 --> 00:17:49,030
Paul, you don't have to do
this if you don't want to.
518
00:17:49,070 --> 00:17:50,870
You don't have to clown for these people.
519
00:17:50,900 --> 00:17:51,900
Yes, you do.
520
00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:53,000
She said...
521
00:17:53,040 --> 00:17:54,840
Open yourself up to the journey.
522
00:17:54,870 --> 00:17:57,240
Look, if Taylor Swift can
live alone in New York,
523
00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:58,580
just think what you can do.
524
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,210
The only thing stopping you is you.
525
00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:06,250
Yeah.
526
00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,090
Ma'am, I will not clown for you today.
527
00:18:08,120 --> 00:18:09,620
Or any day thereafter.
528
00:18:10,720 --> 00:18:12,620
What are you doing?
529
00:18:12,660 --> 00:18:15,260
I am going on a journey.
530
00:18:15,290 --> 00:18:17,230
This is my freaking journey.
531
00:18:17,260 --> 00:18:19,400
(squeaking)
532
00:18:19,430 --> 00:18:21,300
We're taking back the morning. (whoops)
533
00:18:21,330 --> 00:18:23,330
JESS: Happy birthday to your little one.
534
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:34,180
May, we run in different circles.
535
00:18:34,220 --> 00:18:36,020
My circle's not even really a circle.
536
00:18:36,050 --> 00:18:39,160
It's more of a swirling mass of idiots.
537
00:18:39,190 --> 00:18:41,160
But, uh, that's me.
538
00:18:41,190 --> 00:18:42,660
Yeah, you didn't have to come back in here
539
00:18:42,690 --> 00:18:43,690
to tell me you were an idiot.
540
00:18:43,730 --> 00:18:45,130
No.
541
00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:47,760
What I need to tell you is I like you.
542
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,670
And that, um...
543
00:18:50,700 --> 00:18:52,670
and that I hate classical music.
544
00:18:52,700 --> 00:18:54,300
I'm sorry, I do... I hate it.
545
00:18:54,340 --> 00:18:56,170
I mean, there's so many better
kinds of music now, it's...
546
00:18:56,210 --> 00:18:57,770
- Okay.
- Yeah.
547
00:18:57,810 --> 00:19:00,680
But if you're playing it, I want to listen.
548
00:19:00,710 --> 00:19:02,710
- 'Cause you mean a lot to me.
- All right.
549
00:19:06,420 --> 00:19:09,720
I'm gonna play you a song,
and if you can name it...
550
00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:11,690
(sighs) then we can give this another shot.
551
00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:14,160
If you don't want to do this,
just... it's... I'm fine.
552
00:19:14,190 --> 00:19:16,990
(plays Johnny Pearson's "Heavy Action")
553
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:31,210
That's Monday Night Football!
554
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:33,410
Yeah, I learned it for you.
555
00:19:36,750 --> 00:19:37,710
All right.
556
00:19:37,750 --> 00:19:38,710
Oh.
557
00:19:38,750 --> 00:19:39,720
Oh, sorry.
558
00:19:39,750 --> 00:19:40,720
That poked me.
559
00:19:41,790 --> 00:19:43,020
Okay.
560
00:19:43,050 --> 00:19:44,420
No, just don't touch it, don't touch it.
561
00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:45,420
Okay, okay, okay.
562
00:19:45,460 --> 00:19:47,190
- But okay.
- Okay.
563
00:19:57,370 --> 00:19:59,340
Los Angeles! (shoes squeaking)
564
00:19:59,370 --> 00:20:01,340
We are sluts and we are clowns!
565
00:20:01,370 --> 00:20:03,270
But we are not losers!
566
00:20:03,310 --> 00:20:04,710
- We are not losers!
- Yes!
567
00:20:04,740 --> 00:20:06,110
No, we're adventurers!
568
00:20:06,140 --> 00:20:08,280
Shame, shame, I know your name.
569
00:20:08,310 --> 00:20:10,350
Ah... yo, Nicholas!
570
00:20:10,380 --> 00:20:11,750
Hey, Genzlinger!
571
00:20:11,780 --> 00:20:12,780
I miss you, man!
572
00:20:12,820 --> 00:20:14,020
Great shoes!
573
00:20:14,050 --> 00:20:15,620
Guess what, guys, I'm still here.
574
00:20:15,650 --> 00:20:17,090
Take that, Lyme's disease!
575
00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:18,520
Cecilia, what is that shirt?
576
00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:19,690
"The man, the legend"?
577
00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:21,420
Oh, I think you've met the legend.
578
00:20:21,460 --> 00:20:23,130
Hey, you guys want a ride?!
579
00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:24,130
- Yeah!
- Nah!
580
00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:25,560
No.
581
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:27,400
No, we've made it this far.
582
00:20:27,430 --> 00:20:29,100
We're just gonna carry on through.
583
00:20:29,130 --> 00:20:30,730
- Yeah, that's right, that's right.
- Yeah.
584
00:20:30,770 --> 00:20:32,070
Take that, City of Angels!
585
00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:34,070
For the true angels are we!
586
00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:35,400
Yes!
587
00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:37,270
Charisma, we didn't waste your blow-out!
588
00:20:37,310 --> 00:20:38,980
I know we are having a moment here.
589
00:20:39,010 --> 00:20:40,780
Just take it down a notch.
590
00:20:40,810 --> 00:20:41,910
(elevator dings)
591
00:20:41,950 --> 00:20:43,110
Oh, thank God we made it.
592
00:20:43,150 --> 00:20:44,310
BEAR CLAW: Uh, Jess.
593
00:20:44,350 --> 00:20:46,050
You forgot your purse.
594
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:47,320
I didn't look inside.
595
00:20:47,350 --> 00:20:49,090
(whispering): But I did feel around.
596
00:20:49,120 --> 00:20:50,920
Thanks, Bear Claw.
597
00:20:53,290 --> 00:20:57,660
♪ The forest is very lonely
for a thing like he ♪
598
00:20:57,690 --> 00:20:59,560
♪ I'm a gay wolf ♪
599
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:01,400
♪ He's a gay wolf ♪
600
00:21:01,430 --> 00:21:03,470
♪ The creatures of the forest ♪
601
00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:06,070
- COACH: N-N-N-No, don't go out there, don't.
- ♪ Are set in their ways ♪
602
00:21:06,100 --> 00:21:08,640
- Oh.
- ♪ It's very hard to be ♪
603
00:21:08,670 --> 00:21:10,270
♪ An animal gay ♪
604
00:21:10,310 --> 00:21:11,470
♪ Today ♪
605
00:21:11,510 --> 00:21:13,280
This is super embarrassing.
606
00:21:13,310 --> 00:21:14,280
Yeah.
607
00:21:14,310 --> 00:21:15,280
♪ Today ♪
608
00:21:15,310 --> 00:21:17,580
(howls)
609
00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:20,580
It's why I didn't want to come out here.
610
00:21:20,620 --> 00:21:21,950
We should go to a minor next
611
00:21:21,990 --> 00:21:22,950
to really feel the sadness
612
00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:24,120
- and isolation.
- No.
613
00:21:24,150 --> 00:21:25,840
Yeah, he just wants to be accepted, May.
614
00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:27,840
Yeah, I got it. Love that.
615
00:21:27,850 --> 00:21:30,000
♪ He runs with the pack ♪
616
00:21:30,010 --> 00:21:31,510
♪ All day long ♪
617
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:35,820
- Uhh, this is embarrassing.
- ♪ Inside of him is a sad sad song ♪
618
00:21:35,820 --> 00:21:40,350
♪ And he's a gay wolf all along ♪
619
00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:41,980
♪ But, wait ♪
620
00:21:41,990 --> 00:21:44,530
♪ I'm a gay wolf too ♪
621
00:21:44,540 --> 00:21:48,700
♪ Would you like to eat
some wolf Chinese food ♪
622
00:21:48,710 --> 00:21:51,630
♪ Only if it's gay ♪
623
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:53,480
Clap, now.
624
00:21:53,490 --> 00:21:54,890
Clap. Now.
625
00:21:54,900 --> 00:21:55,690
Thank you.