1
00:00:02,278 --> 00:00:04,443
There he is.

2
00:00:04,444 --> 00:00:07,643
Mr. New York. Mr. Broadway.

3
00:00:07,644 --> 00:00:08,810
Happy last day.

4
00:00:08,811 --> 00:00:10,178
- I made you this.
- Aw.

5
00:00:11,278 --> 00:00:13,277
It's a bunch of pictures of you.

6
00:00:13,278 --> 00:00:14,610
Well, I had to take the
necessary precautions,

7
00:00:14,611 --> 00:00:17,277
because the last time you
left, you forgot who I was.

8
00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:18,743
You called me Jebecca.

9
00:00:18,744 --> 00:00:20,743
Well, thank you so much,
Jess. I really like it.

10
00:00:20,744 --> 00:00:22,144
- Cool.
- Yeah.

11
00:00:23,444 --> 00:00:25,310
Well, that's a kick in the shins.

12
00:00:25,311 --> 00:00:27,543
Look, nothing personal, but,
you know, I've moved a lot,

13
00:00:27,544 --> 00:00:29,777
so I have this system that I use.

14
00:00:29,778 --> 00:00:33,143
Duffel bag full of essentials only.

15
00:00:33,144 --> 00:00:35,610
And... one Jess cube.

16
00:00:35,611 --> 00:00:37,710
You can't get rid of me.

17
00:00:37,711 --> 00:00:39,610
Look, Jess, when I move, I
make a clean break, okay?

18
00:00:39,611 --> 00:00:41,343
I'm not going to get all sentimental.

19
00:00:41,344 --> 00:00:43,277
And you promised you
wouldn't make a big deal.

20
00:00:43,278 --> 00:00:44,677
No, you're right, you're right.
I promised you I wouldn't.

21
00:00:44,678 --> 00:00:46,310
- You did.
- But...

22
00:00:46,311 --> 00:00:47,677
what about everyone else?

23
00:00:47,678 --> 00:00:49,511
Showtime!

24
00:00:50,544 --> 00:00:52,278
Hit it, Schmidt!

25
00:00:53,611 --> 00:00:55,377
Huh?

26
00:00:55,378 --> 00:00:57,343
Oh. ("New York, New York" plays)

27
00:00:57,344 --> 00:00:59,177
Nick, where's your Donald Trump wig?

28
00:00:59,178 --> 00:01:00,210
- It's here.
- JESS: Ugh.

29
00:01:00,211 --> 00:01:01,210
This was not my vision.

30
00:01:01,211 --> 00:01:03,343
I specifically said "dazzle."

31
00:01:03,344 --> 00:01:04,443
You said "razzle-dazzle," and we said,

32
00:01:04,444 --> 00:01:06,177
"We don't want to do that."

33
00:01:06,178 --> 00:01:07,643
Yeah, we told you this is
not what he would want.

34
00:01:07,644 --> 00:01:09,310
This isn't how men say good-bye.

35
00:01:09,311 --> 00:01:12,477
(imitating Don Pardo): Live from
New York, it's Coach's good-bye!

36
00:01:12,478 --> 00:01:13,710
♪ Start spreading the news... ♪

37
00:01:13,711 --> 00:01:15,210
Yeah, show's over.

38
00:01:15,211 --> 00:01:16,643
We ain't doing this?

39
00:01:16,644 --> 00:01:20,343
♪ I'm leaving today ♪

40
00:01:20,344 --> 00:01:22,178
♪ I want to... ♪

41
00:01:28,270 --> 00:01:29,910
COACH: <i>The system works.</i>

42
00:01:29,910 --> 00:01:32,170
Remember, essentials only.

43
00:01:32,170 --> 00:01:34,440
It's not just for packing;
it's a way of life.

44
00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:37,210
You want to move forward, you
got to get rid of the past.

45
00:01:37,210 --> 00:01:38,970
That means throw out all your junk...

46
00:01:38,970 --> 00:01:40,970
- Right...
- Emotional junk, actual junk.

47
00:01:40,970 --> 00:01:42,040
Got to make a clean break.

48
00:01:42,040 --> 00:01:43,610
Clean break. That's right.

49
00:01:43,610 --> 00:01:45,440
You're blowing my mind right now, Coach.

50
00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,510
- Doesn't even mean anything.
- Or does it mean everything?

51
00:01:47,510 --> 00:01:49,040
JESS: I cannot believe you're

52
00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:51,010
all buying into Coach's crazy system.

53
00:01:51,010 --> 00:01:52,470
You guys have fun with your clean break.

54
00:01:52,470 --> 00:01:54,340
I'm gonna go to my room, and I guess

55
00:01:54,340 --> 00:01:56,010
I'll have to cancel the horse and carriage

56
00:01:56,010 --> 00:01:57,310
that I hired to take you to the airport.

57
00:01:57,310 --> 00:01:58,510
May and I are driving.

58
00:01:58,510 --> 00:02:00,010
JESS: You are now.

59
00:02:00,010 --> 00:02:01,240
You guys sure you're up for this?

60
00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:03,310
I am ready for this. I'm single again.

61
00:02:03,310 --> 00:02:05,310
I'm a new man. I'm leaving the past behind.

62
00:02:05,310 --> 00:02:06,570
NICK: I want to get rid of my stuff,

63
00:02:06,570 --> 00:02:09,240
but all my stuff is really, really good,

64
00:02:09,240 --> 00:02:11,210
and I just can't get rid of it.

65
00:02:11,210 --> 00:02:12,910
It's not, and you have to.

66
00:02:12,910 --> 00:02:14,010
Everything you own is trash.

67
00:02:14,010 --> 00:02:15,010
You're basically a hoarder.

68
00:02:15,010 --> 00:02:16,010
Not true.

69
00:02:16,010 --> 00:02:17,310
Everything has meaning.

70
00:02:17,310 --> 00:02:18,510
Everything is connected to something else.

71
00:02:18,510 --> 00:02:20,310
You need to be hard on yourself, okay?

72
00:02:20,310 --> 00:02:22,640
- Now, take this box and fill it up.
- Okay...

73
00:02:22,640 --> 00:02:24,910
- Think I can do it?
- Absolutely.

74
00:02:24,910 --> 00:02:27,470
Okay. I'm gonna get hard and fix myself.

75
00:02:27,470 --> 00:02:29,540
- What?
- That's not... No.

76
00:02:29,540 --> 00:02:31,510
That's... I didn't... No.

77
00:02:31,510 --> 00:02:32,870
Oh, here we go.

78
00:02:32,870 --> 00:02:34,410
The Regis Philbin crepe pan.

79
00:02:34,410 --> 00:02:37,240
Come on, Coach. You can't give this away.

80
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:39,240
Remember February 2014?

81
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:41,040
Or, as we like to call it,

82
00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:43,240
- Crepe History Month.
- Crepe History Month.

83
00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:44,540
WINSTON: <i>It was a hot winter's night.</i>

84
00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:46,570
<i>We were drunk, but our
judgment was on point.</i>

85
00:02:46,570 --> 00:02:48,070
REGIS PHILBIN (over TV):
You hear that sizzle?

86
00:02:48,070 --> 00:02:50,370
Let that sizzle speak!

87
00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:52,240
Those pancakes are paper-thin.

88
00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:54,240
There's only three left, so act fast.

89
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:56,370
This crepe pan... is a knockout!

90
00:02:56,370 --> 00:02:58,610
- Coach, we got to act fast.
- We got to act fast.

91
00:02:58,610 --> 00:03:00,440
- We got to act fast!
- They're so thin!

92
00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:03,340
(both yelling)

93
00:03:03,340 --> 00:03:05,910
You got to take the Rege,
at least for the memories.

94
00:03:05,910 --> 00:03:07,430
- The Rege, man.
- The Rege!

95
00:03:07,550 --> 00:03:08,990
- You know, I can't get rid of the Rege.
- Can't get rid of the...

96
00:03:09,110 --> 00:03:09,790
Psych!

97
00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:11,210
I'm getting rid of the Rege.

98
00:03:11,210 --> 00:03:12,440
Memories are nonessential, all right?

99
00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:14,540
That's what makes the system work.

100
00:03:14,540 --> 00:03:16,370
I found an ant farm full of candy wrappers.

101
00:03:16,370 --> 00:03:17,570
Is this essential?

102
00:03:17,570 --> 00:03:19,070
Like, really, what do you think?

103
00:03:19,070 --> 00:03:20,910
Hmm? I need you to get harder, Nick.

104
00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:23,010
Can you get harder for me?

105
00:03:23,010 --> 00:03:24,940
- What?
- Do you need me to get hard with you?

106
00:03:24,940 --> 00:03:26,170
I feel like you're not...

107
00:03:26,170 --> 00:03:27,540
meaning to say what you're saying.

108
00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,010
Talking about cleaning up.

109
00:03:29,010 --> 00:03:30,540
Schmidt, I think you forgot about this box.

110
00:03:31,910 --> 00:03:33,370
Oh, oh, that's cool. Thanks, man.

111
00:03:33,370 --> 00:03:35,470
- I appreciate it.
- Oh... you got a Cece box.

112
00:03:35,470 --> 00:03:37,070
So what? It's not like everybody

113
00:03:37,070 --> 00:03:39,110
hasn't seen your Phylicia Rashad box.

114
00:03:39,110 --> 00:03:41,310
- No, you hav... You have?
- Birthday card...

115
00:03:41,310 --> 00:03:44,210
Don't... please don't go in
the Cece box. Don't do...

116
00:03:44,210 --> 00:03:46,410
a crude drawing of...

117
00:03:46,410 --> 00:03:49,110
you and Cece and your mixed-race child.

118
00:03:49,110 --> 00:03:50,370
Yes, I painted that.

119
00:03:50,370 --> 00:03:51,910
Ooh, five dollars! Come to daddy.

120
00:03:51,910 --> 00:03:54,310
This five dollars belongs in the box.

121
00:03:54,310 --> 00:03:56,210
It's from the night that I first met Cece.

122
00:03:56,210 --> 00:03:58,140
Looks like it's finally
just the two of us, huh?

123
00:03:58,140 --> 00:04:00,410
Oh, God, you're about to say
something stupid, aren't you?

124
00:04:00,410 --> 00:04:02,170
Yeah.

125
00:04:02,170 --> 00:04:04,170
Girl...

126
00:04:04,170 --> 00:04:05,510
And then I said something stupid, and Cece

127
00:04:05,510 --> 00:04:06,940
made me put money in the douche bag jar.

128
00:04:06,940 --> 00:04:08,310
What'd you say? You say you can flex

129
00:04:08,310 --> 00:04:10,110
- your butt cheeks like pecs?
- I bet you were all like,

130
00:04:10,110 --> 00:04:12,440
"You're making my dong go crazy!"

131
00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:13,510
WINSTON: I bet he said
something chauvinistic...

132
00:04:13,510 --> 00:04:16,140
(laughs) ...that comes from insecurity

133
00:04:16,140 --> 00:04:18,170
but ultimately leads
to something endearing.

134
00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:19,410
You know, it doesn't matter what I said.

135
00:04:19,410 --> 00:04:21,410
- Nonessential, right?
- Exactly.

136
00:04:21,410 --> 00:04:22,870
So, good-bye, Cece.

137
00:04:22,870 --> 00:04:23,970
May some poor street urchin

138
00:04:23,970 --> 00:04:25,240
with a perfect 34-D

139
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:27,010
enjoy the sports bra
that you left in my car.

140
00:04:28,410 --> 00:04:29,570
WINSTON: We got to tell Schmidt

141
00:04:29,570 --> 00:04:30,970
that Cece is in love with him.

142
00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:32,640
Right now, he is out there

143
00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:34,340
throwing away all of his Cece mementos,

144
00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:36,370
acting like he's just going to move on.

145
00:04:36,370 --> 00:04:39,640
Jess, I cannot watch this
when I know what I know.

146
00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:41,440
- I know.
- We got to tell him.

147
00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:43,210
I promised her I wouldn't get involved.

148
00:04:43,210 --> 00:04:45,270
I always meddle. I've learned my lesson.

149
00:04:45,270 --> 00:04:47,610
She's trying to get Schmidt
out of her system,

150
00:04:47,610 --> 00:04:49,140
and we have to support her,

151
00:04:49,140 --> 00:04:51,170
even if it means letting
her climb a mountain

152
00:04:51,170 --> 00:04:52,910
with no prior knowledge or experience.

153
00:04:52,910 --> 00:04:55,140
Yeah, but does she know that
Schmidt and Fawn broke up?

154
00:04:55,140 --> 00:04:56,610
Is she getting our voice mails?

155
00:04:56,610 --> 00:04:58,470
I don't know. She hasn't called me back.

156
00:04:58,470 --> 00:05:01,040
Maybe there's no reception
on the top of Mount Shasta.

157
00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:02,610
(snaps fingers) We try again.

158
00:05:02,610 --> 00:05:04,970
- Hey, Cece, it's Je...
- Hey, yo, Ceec, what up, fam?

159
00:05:04,970 --> 00:05:07,210
It's your girl Winston,
aka Winnie the Bish,

160
00:05:07,210 --> 00:05:09,510
aka-ak-aka Brown Lightning.

161
00:05:09,510 --> 00:05:12,140
Schmidt dropped Fawn
like a bad habit, okay,

162
00:05:12,140 --> 00:05:13,640
so ain't nobody riding shotgun.

163
00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:15,940
So you better get on
while the getting is good.

164
00:05:15,940 --> 00:05:17,540
You got it?

165
00:05:19,510 --> 00:05:21,940
I hate that you're so good at this.

166
00:05:21,940 --> 00:05:23,370
I was so nervous.

167
00:05:23,370 --> 00:05:25,170
Look at all this crap.

168
00:05:25,170 --> 00:05:26,310
Look at this.

169
00:05:26,310 --> 00:05:27,910
"Associated Strategies."

170
00:05:27,910 --> 00:05:29,940
"Ass Strat." What a joke.

171
00:05:29,940 --> 00:05:33,210
More like "Butt Strat."
This place is total butt.

172
00:05:33,210 --> 00:05:35,110
Hey, Jess, it's our sex mug.

173
00:05:35,110 --> 00:05:36,370
- What?
- What?

174
00:05:36,370 --> 00:05:37,640
Oh... nothing.

175
00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:40,370
It's just a mug that Nick
and I used for sex.

176
00:05:40,370 --> 00:05:42,340
- Oh, gross. Like, in it?
- Ew! What?

177
00:05:42,340 --> 00:05:44,570
No. No, we used it when we were dating.

178
00:05:44,570 --> 00:05:46,110
It was hard to find times

179
00:05:46,110 --> 00:05:47,510
to be intimate with everyone around,

180
00:05:47,510 --> 00:05:49,540
so we needed to come up with a code.

181
00:05:49,540 --> 00:05:52,010
Just a way to let each other
know we were aroused

182
00:05:52,010 --> 00:05:53,540
without arousing suspicion.

183
00:05:53,540 --> 00:05:55,510
That's wordplay.

184
00:05:55,510 --> 00:05:58,170
It's also a free writing lesson.

185
00:05:58,290 --> 00:05:59,040
JESS: When one of us

186
00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:01,070
left the mug on the entryway table...

187
00:06:01,070 --> 00:06:02,340
"Ass" out meant it was time to...

188
00:06:02,340 --> 00:06:04,240
- Make love...
- Bone.

189
00:06:04,240 --> 00:06:05,610
Yeah, make love.

190
00:06:05,610 --> 00:06:07,370
We're getting rid of this
thing... especially since

191
00:06:07,370 --> 00:06:08,610
you guys aren't using it anymore, right?

192
00:06:08,610 --> 00:06:10,340
- NICK and JESS: Right.
- Wrong.

193
00:06:10,340 --> 00:06:13,240
I, Winston L'Andre Bishop,

194
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:18,250
saw that very mug on
this very hallway table

195
00:06:18,370 --> 00:06:20,240
just last week...

196
00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,610
"Ass" very out.

197
00:06:22,610 --> 00:06:24,870
Ooh...!

198
00:06:24,870 --> 00:06:26,340
JESS: Winston, that mug hasn't seen

199
00:06:26,340 --> 00:06:27,910
any action in over a year.

200
00:06:27,910 --> 00:06:29,110
You're off your rocker.

201
00:06:29,110 --> 00:06:30,610
If I were off my rocker,

202
00:06:30,610 --> 00:06:33,370
would I take a weekly selfie with my cat?

203
00:06:33,370 --> 00:06:34,870
Oh, Winston.

204
00:06:34,870 --> 00:06:38,340
You see, just last week,
I took this selfie with...

205
00:06:38,340 --> 00:06:39,910
(chuckling): Wait, not that one.

206
00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:42,570
(Winston laughing)

207
00:06:42,570 --> 00:06:45,170
That's crazy. Not that one.
I forgot I had this one.

208
00:06:46,270 --> 00:06:48,070
This selfie,

209
00:06:48,070 --> 00:06:50,410
in front of that table.

210
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:53,270
Sex mug. Question is, who put the mug out?

211
00:06:53,270 --> 00:06:55,480
All right, let's not play the "who
put the mug out" game.

212
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:56,950
We should be focusing on Coach.

213
00:06:57,070 --> 00:06:59,270
I saw you checking out
Jess's butt last week.

214
00:06:59,270 --> 00:07:01,270
- No.
- Yes, she was wearing the "look at me" skirt.

215
00:07:01,270 --> 00:07:02,970
- All right, well, let's not try to...
- My money's on Jess.

216
00:07:02,970 --> 00:07:04,640
- Wait.
- She hasn't had sex since Ryan,

217
00:07:04,640 --> 00:07:06,610
and desperate times call for Nick Miller.

218
00:07:06,610 --> 00:07:08,910
Is the "look at me" skirt the green one?

219
00:07:08,910 --> 00:07:10,310
- Hey. Do not change the subject.
- You are implicating yourself

220
00:07:10,310 --> 00:07:11,940
by changing the subject like that.

221
00:07:11,940 --> 00:07:13,270
Hey!

222
00:07:13,270 --> 00:07:14,310
I put the mug out.

223
00:07:14,310 --> 00:07:16,910
Okay? And, actually, nothing happened,

224
00:07:16,910 --> 00:07:18,540
and I regret nothing.

225
00:07:18,540 --> 00:07:20,340
Now, I'm going to my room,

226
00:07:20,340 --> 00:07:23,410
and I'm considering
throwing out my sunglasses.

227
00:07:31,550 --> 00:07:34,510
So long, old friend.

228
00:07:34,510 --> 00:07:35,510
(sighs)

229
00:07:35,510 --> 00:07:38,110
Just doesn't feel right.

230
00:07:38,110 --> 00:07:40,440
(chuckles): Welcome back, old friend.

231
00:07:40,440 --> 00:07:42,040
(knocks) Hey.

232
00:07:43,140 --> 00:07:44,370
Got a second?

233
00:07:44,370 --> 00:07:45,250
Jess, we don't have to talk about it.

234
00:07:45,370 --> 00:07:48,940
Obviously, I was the one
who put the mug out,

235
00:07:48,940 --> 00:07:51,470
so I wanted to thank you
for covering for me.

236
00:07:51,470 --> 00:07:53,140
- No problem.
- Obviously, we're broken up,

237
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:55,640
and it was... a moment of weakness.

238
00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:57,340
I didn't even know you
put it out; I didn't see it.

239
00:07:57,340 --> 00:07:59,110
- Oh!
- No harm, no foul.

240
00:07:59,110 --> 00:07:59,940
- Well...
- We didn't bone.

241
00:07:59,940 --> 00:08:01,410
No bone, no phone home.

242
00:08:01,410 --> 00:08:04,510
- Great. So we're cool.
- I'm cool if you're cool.

243
00:08:04,510 --> 00:08:05,370
Fanterstic.

244
00:08:05,370 --> 00:08:07,610
I'm going to knit a scarf for Coach.

245
00:08:07,610 --> 00:08:09,240
- I'm sure he'll love it.
- Okay, bye.

246
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:11,970
- Thanks for the chat.
- Sayonara.

247
00:08:12,970 --> 00:08:14,140
Hey, Nick, uh, do you want

248
00:08:14,140 --> 00:08:15,470
to know why I put the mug out?

249
00:08:15,470 --> 00:08:17,310
- We're cool!
- We're cool.

250
00:08:17,310 --> 00:08:18,340
- Go knit that scarf.
- Right.

251
00:08:18,340 --> 00:08:20,340
(door closes)

252
00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:36,970
(whispers): Okay.

253
00:08:38,970 --> 00:08:41,170
No, no, no! Cece!

254
00:08:41,170 --> 00:08:43,240
I want it back! I want it back!

255
00:08:44,510 --> 00:08:46,040
Pop, pop, little bubble!

256
00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:48,170
Let that sizzle speak.

257
00:08:48,170 --> 00:08:50,240
It's time to flip. Care to do the honors?

258
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:51,440
Ah, sure, man. That'd be cool.

259
00:08:53,340 --> 00:08:55,240
Rude.

260
00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:57,510
Winston, you're not gonna trick
me into taking the stupid pan.

261
00:08:57,510 --> 00:08:59,340
It stays behind... that's the system!

262
00:08:59,340 --> 00:09:01,040
Clean break.

263
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,470
You know what, fine, Coach,
don't take it with you.

264
00:09:02,470 --> 00:09:03,870
Leave everything behind.

265
00:09:03,870 --> 00:09:05,340
Try not to remember anyone.

266
00:09:05,340 --> 00:09:07,510
We are nonessential.

267
00:09:07,510 --> 00:09:09,310
Message received.

268
00:09:11,870 --> 00:09:14,210
Nah, Coach, I don't think so.

269
00:09:14,210 --> 00:09:16,640
Because this crepe belongs

270
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:19,340
in the belly of someone with a heart.

271
00:09:25,010 --> 00:09:27,040
(sighs)

272
00:09:28,110 --> 00:09:29,210
Damn it!

273
00:09:30,210 --> 00:09:31,310
Ouch!

274
00:09:32,370 --> 00:09:33,410
(groans)

275
00:09:37,370 --> 00:09:38,480
Why are you so secure?

276
00:09:38,600 --> 00:09:40,510
You're filled with things
that nobody wants!

277
00:09:43,540 --> 00:09:45,870
Oh. Thank God.

278
00:09:45,870 --> 00:09:47,310
Hey, how are you?

279
00:09:47,310 --> 00:09:49,040
I dropped something in the
bin, and I need it back.

280
00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:50,410
You Jewish?

281
00:09:57,570 --> 00:10:00,540
I just need a bo... I just need a box.

282
00:10:00,540 --> 00:10:02,370
I just can't part with you.

283
00:10:02,370 --> 00:10:04,870
- Okay, I'll tell you what happened.
- You knit fast.

284
00:10:04,870 --> 00:10:08,040
Winston had fallen asleep
polishing his candelabra.

285
00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:10,070
I had just opened a bottle of pink wine,

286
00:10:10,070 --> 00:10:11,940
- and then you showed up.
- NICK: Oh, hey.

287
00:10:11,940 --> 00:10:13,340
Just working out.

288
00:10:13,340 --> 00:10:14,910
Got to sweep the temple.

289
00:10:16,070 --> 00:10:18,070
♪ ♪

290
00:10:20,970 --> 00:10:25,240
(groaning, growling)

291
00:10:26,570 --> 00:10:28,640
Damn...

292
00:10:30,540 --> 00:10:32,910
So, see, it wasn't my fault.

293
00:10:32,910 --> 00:10:34,910
In your defense, I've been
working on my body,

294
00:10:34,910 --> 00:10:36,910
doing my burpees, and it shows.

295
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:40,440
(knees crackling)

296
00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:48,240
(knees crackle)

297
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:50,140
(winded): I'm not gonna do that again.

298
00:10:50,140 --> 00:10:51,940
- Nick...
- Warrior pose!

299
00:10:53,510 --> 00:10:56,510
Nick, is there anything that I do

300
00:10:56,510 --> 00:11:00,510
that makes you think about
putting the mug out?

301
00:11:03,640 --> 00:11:05,640
No, I-I can't think of anything.

302
00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:09,510
Right.

303
00:11:09,510 --> 00:11:11,610
It's just not the way that
this old brain works.

304
00:11:11,610 --> 00:11:13,270
Clean break.

305
00:11:13,270 --> 00:11:15,610
Great. Clean break. I agree.

306
00:11:15,610 --> 00:11:17,870
Jess, hold on. Hey,
hey... H-How is that...?

307
00:11:18,610 --> 00:11:20,610
Jess, wait!

308
00:11:22,340 --> 00:11:24,510
Yeah, I'm stuck.

309
00:11:26,910 --> 00:11:27,820
Well, we seem to be

310
00:11:27,940 --> 00:11:29,010
in a bit of a conundrum.

311
00:11:29,130 --> 00:11:30,640
How do I know this is your box?

312
00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:33,010
Do you have any identification, "Cece"?

313
00:11:33,010 --> 00:11:34,910
Cece's my ex-girlfriend;
it's a box of her things.

314
00:11:34,910 --> 00:11:36,870
But I can tell you
everything that's in there.

315
00:11:36,870 --> 00:11:38,610
There's some paintings, erotic writings,

316
00:11:38,610 --> 00:11:39,610
there's a brassiere.

317
00:11:39,610 --> 00:11:41,310
Why would you have her brassiere?

318
00:11:41,310 --> 00:11:43,140
Well, you know, she left
it in my car, and I kept it.

319
00:11:43,140 --> 00:11:44,640
She never asked for it back?

320
00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:48,310
Okay, um, Wally, look,
it's a box of memories.

321
00:11:48,310 --> 00:11:50,610
Memories that I'm not
ready to let go of yet.

322
00:11:50,610 --> 00:11:52,240
Maybe if I could talk to Cece...

323
00:11:52,240 --> 00:11:54,170
Can't talk to Cece; Cece's
on top of a mountain.

324
00:11:54,170 --> 00:11:56,070
Look, I know this is unusual,

325
00:11:56,070 --> 00:11:57,340
but I need that box back, Wally.

326
00:11:57,340 --> 00:11:58,970
I need it back more than anything else

327
00:11:58,970 --> 00:12:00,640
I've ever needed in my life.

328
00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:02,210
Please.

329
00:12:02,210 --> 00:12:05,000
Does she know she's on the mountain,

330
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:06,870
or is she being held
there against her will?

331
00:12:06,870 --> 00:12:07,610
Damn it, Wally, give me the box!

332
00:12:07,610 --> 00:12:11,970
No! No!

333
00:12:11,970 --> 00:12:13,310
- (whistle blowing)
- Wally!

334
00:12:13,310 --> 00:12:14,940
Stop blowing the whistle!

335
00:12:14,940 --> 00:12:16,440
You're sexually safe!

336
00:12:19,940 --> 00:12:21,370
Coach, is that a bigger bag?

337
00:12:21,370 --> 00:12:24,210
My old bag broke, so I got a wheelie.

338
00:12:24,210 --> 00:12:25,440
Same system.

339
00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:27,010
Still only essentials.

340
00:12:27,010 --> 00:12:28,270
(pan clangs)

341
00:12:28,270 --> 00:12:30,240
Is there a pan in there?

342
00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:32,110
Nah. Nah, that's not a pan.

343
00:12:32,110 --> 00:12:33,640
That was just, uh, the sound of

344
00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:35,340
two track pants hitting together.

345
00:12:35,340 --> 00:12:38,440
You know, the buttons
be like... ting... ti...

346
00:12:39,570 --> 00:12:42,010
But, um... (clears throat)

347
00:12:42,010 --> 00:12:43,640
Yeah, since I got this new suitcase,

348
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:46,010
I might as well take a few more things.

349
00:12:46,010 --> 00:12:48,010
Just to fill up space. Know what I mean?

350
00:12:48,010 --> 00:12:49,340
Just to fill up space.

351
00:12:49,340 --> 00:12:51,570
Like, uh...

352
00:12:51,570 --> 00:12:54,170
take these glass grapes.

353
00:12:56,210 --> 00:12:57,440
Just to fill up space.

354
00:12:57,440 --> 00:12:58,570
Not that I want them.

355
00:12:58,570 --> 00:12:59,570
Of course not.

356
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:00,870
And this blanket.

357
00:13:00,870 --> 00:13:02,370
For cushioning.

358
00:13:02,370 --> 00:13:03,570
(moans)

359
00:13:03,570 --> 00:13:04,640
That smells nice, huh?

360
00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:06,110
For cushioning, dude.

361
00:13:07,270 --> 00:13:08,640
These mystery novels.

362
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:10,410
Take these.

363
00:13:10,410 --> 00:13:12,640
Not 'cause they're Jess's, just because...

364
00:13:12,640 --> 00:13:14,370
I'm an avid reader now.

365
00:13:14,370 --> 00:13:16,870
Stop smiling at me, man.

366
00:13:16,870 --> 00:13:19,040
I'm taking Nick's workout jams.

367
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:20,910
'Cause, uh...

368
00:13:20,910 --> 00:13:22,870
that one time I trained him,

369
00:13:22,870 --> 00:13:24,540
(voice breaking): saw a lot of results.

370
00:13:24,540 --> 00:13:26,970
(voice breaking): I
remember. He was so fat.

371
00:13:26,970 --> 00:13:29,540
And I'm taking this remote.

372
00:13:29,540 --> 00:13:31,870
Because you always hit the
info button by mistake.

373
00:13:31,870 --> 00:13:34,270
No, no, it's not by mistake, Coach.

374
00:13:34,270 --> 00:13:35,870
(sobbing softly)

375
00:13:35,870 --> 00:13:38,070
I like to know more
about the cast and crew.

376
00:13:38,070 --> 00:13:41,270
Remote's gonna miss this TV so much.

377
00:13:41,270 --> 00:13:44,070
Our TV is gonna miss that remote.

378
00:13:44,070 --> 00:13:46,870
(sobs)

379
00:13:46,870 --> 00:13:48,140
(sniffs)

380
00:13:48,140 --> 00:13:49,940
Smells like all our fingers.

381
00:13:49,940 --> 00:13:52,340
(both sobbing)

382
00:13:52,340 --> 00:13:54,340
(wailing)

383
00:13:57,110 --> 00:13:58,270
Hey, Jess.

384
00:13:58,270 --> 00:13:59,870
Hey.

385
00:13:59,870 --> 00:14:02,510
Do you really think

386
00:14:02,510 --> 00:14:04,870
I haven't thought about
putting this mug out?

387
00:14:04,870 --> 00:14:07,240
Oh, I don't know, Nick. You said it.

388
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:09,170
What's past is past. Clean break.

389
00:14:09,170 --> 00:14:12,410
Think about my living
conditions for the past year.

390
00:14:12,410 --> 00:14:15,310
I live across the hall from
my beautiful ex-girlfriend.

391
00:14:15,310 --> 00:14:17,440
And your living conditions...

392
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,640
you live across the hall from
your beautiful ex-boyfriend.

393
00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:22,370
Two true beauties.

394
00:14:22,370 --> 00:14:23,610
So you have thought about it.

395
00:14:23,610 --> 00:14:24,870
I'm a man.

396
00:14:24,870 --> 00:14:26,610
- I am a human man.
- Interesting.

397
00:14:26,610 --> 00:14:28,060
You're the one who's always
getting out of that shower

398
00:14:28,180 --> 00:14:29,390
in that little towel, Jess.

399
00:14:29,710 --> 00:14:31,510
Or you're wearing your glitter

400
00:14:31,510 --> 00:14:33,270
or your pantyhose.

401
00:14:33,270 --> 00:14:35,440
They're driving me crazy! Okay?

402
00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:37,440
I know how hard it is to
get those pantyhose up,

403
00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:39,440
and I just... I just sometimes
want to rip 'em down.

404
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:41,170
Just admit it, Miller!

405
00:14:41,170 --> 00:14:42,970
You're thinking about putting
the mug down right now!

406
00:14:42,970 --> 00:14:44,510
No.

407
00:14:44,510 --> 00:14:47,540
Admit that you want me
to be thinking about it.

408
00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:49,810
I don't want you to think about
it, so stop thinking about it.

409
00:14:49,930 --> 00:14:51,940
Well stop talking about it and
then I'll stop thinking about it.

410
00:14:51,940 --> 00:14:53,270
- So, you are thinking about it?
- Look, Jess!

411
00:14:53,270 --> 00:14:54,640
I'm not not...

412
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,370
thinking about it.

413
00:14:59,370 --> 00:15:00,870
(door opens)

414
00:15:02,310 --> 00:15:05,310
Hey, guys. Want to know
what happened to me today?

415
00:15:05,310 --> 00:15:06,450
JESS and NICK: We're kind of
in the middle of something...

416
00:15:06,570 --> 00:15:07,220
Fine, I'll tell you.

417
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:10,010
I spent $500 to get
back a five dollar bill.

418
00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:11,870
Go ahead, call me a fool.

419
00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,340
You won't be the first person
to call me that today.

420
00:15:13,340 --> 00:15:15,340
You're a fool!

421
00:15:15,340 --> 00:15:17,140
I need to move on.

422
00:15:17,140 --> 00:15:19,040
I'm never gonna get Cece back.

423
00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:20,410
And I know it's my fault that I lost her.

424
00:15:20,410 --> 00:15:21,640
NICK: You lost her twice.

425
00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:23,640
- You had her...
- I know I lost her twice.

426
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,640
- Why would you have to...?
- Then you got her, then you blew it.

427
00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:26,640
Then you got her...

428
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:29,210
Who are you clarifying this for?

429
00:15:29,210 --> 00:15:31,070
Are you sure you know
how Cece feels about you?

430
00:15:31,070 --> 00:15:32,570
Yeah, I mean, she said a thousand times

431
00:15:32,570 --> 00:15:35,430
- that she only wants to be friends with me.
- Schmidt...

432
00:15:35,550 --> 00:15:37,410
Jess, Cece doesn't love
me and she never will.

433
00:15:37,410 --> 00:15:39,170
So I think it's time to let go.

434
00:15:39,170 --> 00:15:41,370
- Nick, I want you to have this five dollars.
- What?

435
00:15:41,370 --> 00:15:44,200
Go buy yourself something
special, like a burrito.

436
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:45,370
I love burritos.

437
00:15:45,370 --> 00:15:46,910
Oh, I have to tell you something, Schmidt!

438
00:15:46,910 --> 00:15:48,240
I... (groans)

439
00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:50,440
But I can't tell you.

440
00:15:50,440 --> 00:15:51,940
(groans) So, I'll...

441
00:15:51,940 --> 00:15:53,940
I'll tell you. Loophole!

442
00:15:53,940 --> 00:15:55,070
Nick...

443
00:15:55,070 --> 00:15:57,170
Cece's in love with Schmidt.

444
00:15:57,170 --> 00:15:59,240
What?

445
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:01,210
(sighs) Yeah.

446
00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:03,510
For real?

447
00:16:03,510 --> 00:16:05,870
- Well...
- Also, Winston promised...

448
00:16:05,870 --> 00:16:07,170
- Why are we talking about Winston?!
- Winston...

449
00:16:07,170 --> 00:16:09,450
Cece loves me! Nick, we did it!

450
00:16:09,570 --> 00:16:10,720
I got to go!

451
00:16:12,780 --> 00:16:13,670
Can't wait for Cece

452
00:16:13,790 --> 00:16:14,770
to get back from her trip.

453
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:17,400
I'm going after her. Coach... (sighs)

454
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:22,170
I used to wish that you were uglier.

455
00:16:23,570 --> 00:16:25,240
I don't wish that anymore.

456
00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:27,040
I only wish you the best.

457
00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:29,470
Hey, you're the handsome
one in the loft now.

458
00:16:29,470 --> 00:16:32,370
Big responsibility, but
I think you're ready.

459
00:16:32,370 --> 00:16:34,540
All right, you guys, I'm off.

460
00:16:34,540 --> 00:16:36,410
Off to climb a mountain.

461
00:16:36,410 --> 00:16:38,070
I'll see you in autumn.

462
00:16:38,070 --> 00:16:40,070
Winter at the latest.

463
00:16:40,070 --> 00:16:41,210
- Good luck, Schmidt.
- Yeah.

464
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:42,910
- You go get her!
- Okay.

465
00:16:42,910 --> 00:16:44,140
COACH: Find that girl.

466
00:16:44,140 --> 00:16:47,010
- WINSTON: See you, Schmidt!
- JESS: Bye!

467
00:16:47,010 --> 00:16:49,610
Cece!

468
00:16:49,610 --> 00:16:52,410
Cece.

469
00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:56,210
Hey, um...

470
00:16:56,210 --> 00:16:59,070
so, I was, I was on the
top of this mountain,

471
00:16:59,070 --> 00:17:00,610
and I finally got cell reception

472
00:17:00,610 --> 00:17:03,110
and there were, like,
20 voice mails from...

473
00:17:03,110 --> 00:17:04,870
Are you in love with me?

474
00:17:06,110 --> 00:17:08,240
Because I'm in love with you.

475
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:10,570
Deeply.

476
00:17:10,570 --> 00:17:12,570
But I assumed that you
would never because I've...

477
00:17:12,570 --> 00:17:14,170
I've messed this up so many times.

478
00:17:14,170 --> 00:17:15,870
And you've made it very clear
that you just want to be friends

479
00:17:15,870 --> 00:17:17,970
with me and I value
that friendship so much.

480
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:19,970
So if I'm ruining it by doing

481
00:17:19,970 --> 00:17:22,240
any of this, please, please stop me!

482
00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:24,970
Schmidt.

483
00:17:28,470 --> 00:17:30,570
I'm in...

484
00:17:30,570 --> 00:17:32,270
I'm in love with you.

485
00:17:32,270 --> 00:17:34,440
(quietly cheering)

486
00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:35,640
Really?

487
00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:37,010
Mm-hmm.

488
00:17:37,010 --> 00:17:40,070
Yeah.

489
00:17:40,070 --> 00:17:44,040
Yeah, it's kind of stupid how
much I'm in love with you.

490
00:17:44,040 --> 00:17:46,140
You should've seen how fast
I came down that mountain.

491
00:17:46,140 --> 00:17:48,010
I mean, a lot of it was falling.

492
00:17:48,010 --> 00:17:49,640
Luckily, the ground just stopped me, but...

493
00:17:51,970 --> 00:17:53,270
You remember this?

494
00:17:53,270 --> 00:17:56,370
Looks like it's finally
just the two of us, huh?

495
00:17:56,370 --> 00:17:58,640
Oh, God, you're about to say
something stupid, aren't you?

496
00:17:58,640 --> 00:18:00,270
Yeah.

497
00:18:00,270 --> 00:18:03,510
Girl, I'm-a marry you.

498
00:18:03,510 --> 00:18:04,640
Jar.

499
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:07,140
I know this might seem crazy,

500
00:18:07,140 --> 00:18:09,970
uh, and...

501
00:18:09,970 --> 00:18:12,970
probably a little bit
impulsive, but it's not.

502
00:18:12,970 --> 00:18:15,510
Not for me.

503
00:18:15,510 --> 00:18:17,970
I've known since the minute that I met you.

504
00:18:19,870 --> 00:18:22,540
(gasps) Oh, my God.

505
00:18:22,540 --> 00:18:24,040
Cecelia Parikh...

506
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:25,140
Oh, God, you're gonna say

507
00:18:25,140 --> 00:18:26,170
something stupid, aren't you?

508
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:29,140
Girl, will you marry me?

509
00:18:29,140 --> 00:18:32,470
(all gasping, screaming, laughing)

510
00:18:32,470 --> 00:18:34,170
Would you please shut up?!
I can't hear the answer!

511
00:18:34,170 --> 00:18:35,070
Oh. Shh. Yeah.

512
00:18:36,210 --> 00:18:37,140
Yes!

513
00:18:37,140 --> 00:18:38,870
(all cheering)

514
00:18:38,870 --> 00:18:41,040
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

515
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,170
We're getting married!

516
00:18:44,170 --> 00:18:46,310
(all cheering)

517
00:18:48,010 --> 00:18:50,210
(chattering happily) We did it!

518
00:18:53,410 --> 00:18:55,040
Go say bye.

519
00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:01,310
Uh...

520
00:19:02,370 --> 00:19:06,070
I love you guys and, uh...

521
00:19:06,070 --> 00:19:08,470
I'm gonna miss you.

522
00:19:09,310 --> 00:19:11,010
Especially you, Jebecca.

523
00:19:12,070 --> 00:19:13,510
Aw.

524
00:19:13,510 --> 00:19:14,510
(all laugh)

525
00:19:14,510 --> 00:19:15,540
All right, man.

526
00:19:15,540 --> 00:19:17,870
All right! Aw.

527
00:19:17,870 --> 00:19:18,970
We're gonna miss you.

528
00:19:18,970 --> 00:19:20,040
Bye, buddy.

529
00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:21,270
Good-bye, Coach.

530
00:19:21,270 --> 00:19:22,440
See you, man.

531
00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:24,070
- See you, Coach!
- Save the date! Bye!

532
00:19:24,070 --> 00:19:25,340
Bye!

533
00:19:25,340 --> 00:19:27,070
- Bye!
- Don't ever change, Coach.

534
00:19:27,070 --> 00:19:29,210
- See you at the wedding!
- He's gonna change.

535
00:19:29,210 --> 00:19:30,870
- NICK: Later!
- JESS: Bye!

536
00:19:30,870 --> 00:19:34,040
- WINSTON: See you, buddy!
- SCHMIDT: See you!

537
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:37,170
Adios.

538
00:19:37,170 --> 00:19:40,410
♪ Nothing is as it has been ♪

539
00:19:40,410 --> 00:19:44,240
♪ And I miss your face like hell ♪

540
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:47,170
- I think it's time.
- It's time.

541
00:19:47,170 --> 00:19:51,370
♪ And I guess it's just as well ♪

542
00:19:51,370 --> 00:19:53,570
Clean break?

543
00:19:53,570 --> 00:19:55,440
Clean... break.

544
00:19:57,110 --> 00:19:59,740
Actually, do you mind talking
with me for, like, ten minutes?

545
00:19:59,860 --> 00:20:01,170
Cece and Schmidt are in my room.

546
00:20:01,170 --> 00:20:02,170
Oh, sure. (crying nearby)

547
00:20:02,170 --> 00:20:04,470
Oh, Cece's crying.

548
00:20:04,470 --> 00:20:06,210
- Aw.
- Aw.

549
00:20:06,210 --> 00:20:08,540
(high-pitched crying)

550
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:11,010
I can't believe this is happening.

551
00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:12,910
It's everything that I've ever wanted.

552
00:20:12,910 --> 00:20:15,440
Okay, I know. Me, too.

553
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:18,240
But... we can't have
sex if you keep crying.

554
00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:19,370
- I'm gonna stop.
- Great.

555
00:20:19,370 --> 00:20:20,540
- I'm gonna stop.
- Great!

556
00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:21,970
'Cause I get it. It gets in the way.

557
00:20:21,970 --> 00:20:23,640
Right. All right.

558
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,410
♪ Been talking 'bout the
way things change ♪

559
00:20:28,410 --> 00:20:30,370
(high-pitched crying) Okay.

560
00:20:30,370 --> 00:20:31,370
I know.

561
00:20:31,370 --> 00:20:33,910
(crying continues)

562
00:20:35,210 --> 00:20:38,110
♪ And my family lives ♪

563
00:20:38,110 --> 00:20:41,470
♪ In a different state ♪

564
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:46,940
♪ And if you don't know what ♪

565
00:20:46,940 --> 00:20:48,410
♪ To make of this ♪

566
00:20:48,410 --> 00:20:51,970
♪ Then we will not ♪

567
00:20:51,970 --> 00:20:54,510
♪ Relate ♪

568
00:20:54,510 --> 00:20:58,510
♪ So if you don't know
what to make of this ♪

569
00:20:59,940 --> 00:21:04,470
♪ Then we will not relate ♪

570
00:21:08,270 --> 00:21:09,510
Well, these people were about to throw away

571
00:21:09,510 --> 00:21:10,940
a perfectly good mug.

572
00:21:10,940 --> 00:21:12,940
Full disclosure, it used to be a sex mug.

573
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:14,510
But now it's a cat mug.

574
00:21:16,870 --> 00:21:19,970
Nothing wrong with us.

575
00:21:19,970 --> 00:21:24,610
♪ Oh, rivers and roads, rivers and roads ♪

576
00:21:24,610 --> 00:21:28,610
♪ Rivers till I reach you ♪

577
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:33,210
♪ Oh... ♪
♪ Rivers and roads ♪

578
00:21:33,210 --> 00:21:36,070
♪ Rivers and roads ♪

579
00:21:36,070 --> 00:21:38,070
♪ Rivers till I reach you. ♪