1 00:00:02,092 --> 00:00:04,153 They've scored five touchdowns in this game... 2 00:00:04,178 --> 00:00:05,477 Wow. Check this out. 3 00:00:05,513 --> 00:00:07,247 Coach and May's foreign exchange student 4 00:00:07,272 --> 00:00:08,738 just added me as a friend. 5 00:00:08,774 --> 00:00:10,707 Montsie. His name is Montsie. 6 00:00:10,742 --> 00:00:12,575 I didn't know they had a foreign exchange student. 7 00:00:12,611 --> 00:00:14,044 I didn't know they moved to North Carolina. 8 00:00:14,079 --> 00:00:15,412 Neither did I. 9 00:00:15,447 --> 00:00:17,280 - They moved to North Carol... what? - Yeah. 10 00:00:17,316 --> 00:00:19,616 How did none of us know about this? How is that possible? 11 00:00:19,651 --> 00:00:22,085 - Eh, they moved. It happened. - We need to make more of an effort. 12 00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:24,020 We don't even know that our friend has moved to a different state. 13 00:00:24,056 --> 00:00:25,288 I mean, we're still friends. 14 00:00:25,324 --> 00:00:27,123 We just have nothing to do with each other. 15 00:00:27,159 --> 00:00:28,224 This doesn't bother you? 16 00:00:28,260 --> 00:00:29,492 Realistically, we'll probably see 'em 17 00:00:29,528 --> 00:00:31,461 two or three more times before we die. 18 00:00:31,496 --> 00:00:33,296 And it's sad, but it's also not that sad. 19 00:00:33,332 --> 00:00:34,798 - What? - Who cares? What's for dinner? 20 00:00:34,833 --> 00:00:36,333 I care. 21 00:00:36,368 --> 00:00:38,001 McKenna, please. Please, don't do this. Okay? I mean, 22 00:00:38,036 --> 00:00:40,303 what about that formal swimwear ad I got you? McKenna? 23 00:00:40,339 --> 00:00:41,938 McKen...? 24 00:00:41,973 --> 00:00:44,107 Well, guys! It happened again. 25 00:00:44,142 --> 00:00:47,437 A big agency stole another one of my clients. 26 00:00:47,462 --> 00:00:49,243 And I have a big audition today. 27 00:00:49,268 --> 00:00:50,680 - Gosh darn it. You know what? - Jess! 28 00:00:50,716 --> 00:00:52,248 Those pretty boys don't deserve you. 29 00:00:52,284 --> 00:00:54,638 Which one is McKenna? Is he the gaunt, heroin-hot one? 30 00:00:54,663 --> 00:00:57,003 That's Jean Francois. He got poached last week. 31 00:00:57,039 --> 00:00:59,806 McKenna's the one that looked like a jacked Bryant Gumbel. 32 00:00:59,841 --> 00:01:01,278 - Oh... - And this is a huge deal! 33 00:01:01,303 --> 00:01:03,143 It's the Sausage Crunchies account! 34 00:01:03,178 --> 00:01:04,444 Why would a dog food company 35 00:01:04,479 --> 00:01:06,798 be interested in a bunch of hot models? 36 00:01:06,823 --> 00:01:08,014 - Oh, no, it's, uh... - No, no, no. 37 00:01:08,050 --> 00:01:09,482 Sausage Crunchies are people food. 38 00:01:09,518 --> 00:01:11,017 They're like brown cheese snacks. 39 00:01:11,053 --> 00:01:12,852 Yeah, it's like space food. I-I put them in soup. 40 00:01:12,888 --> 00:01:14,054 I just really wanted to show 41 00:01:14,089 --> 00:01:15,755 this casting agency that I was legit. 42 00:01:15,791 --> 00:01:17,690 Now, if I go down there with just Donovan, 43 00:01:17,726 --> 00:01:19,459 I'm gonna look like a no-name hustler. 44 00:01:19,494 --> 00:01:20,748 - Gosh darn it. - Should I go out now, 45 00:01:20,773 --> 00:01:22,662 and try to find new clients, or should I concentrate 46 00:01:22,697 --> 00:01:25,065 on the one client that I have left? 47 00:01:25,090 --> 00:01:27,895 You know, they're probably sniffing around Donovan as we speak. 48 00:01:27,930 --> 00:01:29,061 Crap. 49 00:01:29,104 --> 00:01:30,352 Is that what he wants to talk to me about? 50 00:01:30,377 --> 00:01:31,805 He said he wanted to talk to me about something. 51 00:01:31,831 --> 00:01:32,868 Is that what he wanted to talk to me about? 52 00:01:32,893 --> 00:01:34,240 - These poachers. - Cece... Cece, calm. 53 00:01:34,276 --> 00:01:35,875 You concentrate on Donovan. 54 00:01:35,911 --> 00:01:38,211 I'll go see if I can drum up some new clients. 55 00:01:38,246 --> 00:01:40,747 Very sweet, but the audition is in six hours from now. 56 00:01:40,782 --> 00:01:42,549 So we have no time to look for new clients. 57 00:01:42,584 --> 00:01:44,984 Well, recruiting is just like sales, I mean selling a job 58 00:01:45,020 --> 00:01:47,897 is just like selling drugs. I do that every day. 59 00:01:47,922 --> 00:01:51,250 Are you offering to help, too? 60 00:01:51,297 --> 00:01:53,641 Honestly, I wasn't. 61 00:01:53,674 --> 00:01:56,096 But based on how intensely you're staring at me, 62 00:01:56,131 --> 00:01:58,832 I guess I've boxed myself into a corner here, so... 63 00:01:58,867 --> 00:02:00,867 Great! Okay. You concentrate on Donovan. 64 00:02:00,902 --> 00:02:03,282 We'll get the models. Heads in, guys. 65 00:02:03,307 --> 00:02:04,314 - What? - "Heads in"? 66 00:02:04,339 --> 00:02:06,673 - No. It's "hands in." - I'm pretty sure it's "heads in." 67 00:02:06,708 --> 00:02:08,675 What are we supposed to do? Smoosh our heads together? 68 00:02:08,710 --> 00:02:10,345 - Yeah. - Everybody. Hands in. 69 00:02:10,370 --> 00:02:11,678 - Hands in. - Hands in. 70 00:02:13,439 --> 00:02:14,458 Meow. 71 00:02:14,483 --> 00:02:15,582 - Winston! - What? 72 00:02:15,617 --> 00:02:17,962 - How are you not tired of this? - Tired of what? 73 00:02:19,565 --> 00:02:21,564 Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb www.addic7ed.com 74 00:02:23,665 --> 00:02:26,593 Okay, model types, 3:00. 75 00:02:26,628 --> 00:02:29,062 - Take a bow. - Wait, those two oatmeal men? 76 00:02:29,097 --> 00:02:30,763 Follow my lead. 77 00:02:30,799 --> 00:02:32,384 How did we ever date the same dude? 78 00:02:32,409 --> 00:02:33,829 Hey! 79 00:02:33,854 --> 00:02:37,470 Kampai. That's Japanese for "What's up?" 80 00:02:37,506 --> 00:02:39,139 Hi! Jessica Day. 81 00:02:39,174 --> 00:02:40,445 What are we celebrating? 82 00:02:40,470 --> 00:02:42,866 Kirby here works for a marine biologist. 83 00:02:42,891 --> 00:02:45,845 and he got them to name a new species of sea slug after me. 84 00:02:45,881 --> 00:02:48,821 - Oh! - It's called Bruce's Eastern Sea Slug. 85 00:02:48,846 --> 00:02:50,235 You two are fascinating. 86 00:02:50,260 --> 00:02:52,382 Have you ever considered modeling? 87 00:02:52,407 --> 00:02:54,461 - I actually have. A-a lot. - Us? 88 00:02:54,486 --> 00:02:56,679 - I have a rich fantasy life. - Oh. 89 00:02:56,704 --> 00:02:58,091 I can't wait to hear more about that. 90 00:02:58,126 --> 00:02:59,626 Sounds so great. 91 00:02:59,661 --> 00:03:00,766 What are you doing? 92 00:03:00,791 --> 00:03:02,563 Those guys are obviously not model material. 93 00:03:02,588 --> 00:03:05,124 Because they're not cookie-cutter hot? 94 00:03:05,149 --> 00:03:06,953 Cece needs a bunch of different guys, 95 00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:08,768 so don't judge a book by its cover. 96 00:03:08,803 --> 00:03:10,303 Except when you're talking about models. 97 00:03:10,338 --> 00:03:12,455 Models exist to be on covers. 98 00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:13,973 I think that's an oversimplification. 99 00:03:14,009 --> 00:03:15,909 I think the best models have something 100 00:03:15,944 --> 00:03:17,477 to give them a little personality. 101 00:03:17,512 --> 00:03:19,946 Something, something that makes them stand apart. 102 00:03:19,981 --> 00:03:22,237 Like a gap in their lower teeth, 103 00:03:22,262 --> 00:03:23,616 or a neck nipple. 104 00:03:23,652 --> 00:03:25,830 You're making this way too complicated. 105 00:03:25,855 --> 00:03:27,306 Look, this is all it needs to be... 106 00:03:27,331 --> 00:03:28,821 you walk up to a hot guy, okay? 107 00:03:28,857 --> 00:03:30,455 And you say "Hey, you're hot. 108 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:31,472 "Do you want to be a model?" 109 00:03:31,497 --> 00:03:33,048 You have to forge a connection with them. 110 00:03:33,073 --> 00:03:34,649 And that way they entrust us with the thing 111 00:03:34,674 --> 00:03:35,893 that makes them really beautiful. 112 00:03:35,918 --> 00:03:37,597 You know what? You do your thing. 113 00:03:37,632 --> 00:03:38,865 I'll do my thing. 114 00:03:38,900 --> 00:03:40,600 But your thing cannot be 115 00:03:40,635 --> 00:03:42,323 going back to the slug guys. 116 00:03:42,348 --> 00:03:43,970 Sea slugs, Reagan. 117 00:03:44,005 --> 00:03:46,175 They're sea slug guys. 118 00:03:47,214 --> 00:03:48,942 But you're right. 119 00:03:48,977 --> 00:03:51,159 You're nasty about it, but you're right. 120 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:53,279 So, Donovan, 121 00:03:53,315 --> 00:03:55,462 you have something you want to tell me? 122 00:04:12,089 --> 00:04:15,301 I've... made a big decision. 123 00:04:15,337 --> 00:04:16,536 No, Donovan, don't. 124 00:04:16,571 --> 00:04:18,371 I'm gonna stop wearing beanies. 125 00:04:18,728 --> 00:04:20,610 - Wait, what? - I think. I... 126 00:04:20,673 --> 00:04:23,687 That's what you wanted to talk to me about? 127 00:04:23,712 --> 00:04:26,246 I thought some big agency was trying to poach you. 128 00:04:26,281 --> 00:04:27,413 No. 129 00:04:27,449 --> 00:04:29,327 They've just been sending me baskets 130 00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:32,185 and trying to take me to fancy dinners and stuff. 131 00:04:32,220 --> 00:04:33,203 What? 132 00:04:33,228 --> 00:04:34,587 They've just been giving me baskets 133 00:04:34,623 --> 00:04:36,007 - and trying... - Listen to me, okay? 134 00:04:36,032 --> 00:04:38,703 I know that gift baskets are great. 135 00:04:38,728 --> 00:04:39,712 - Yeah. - They are. 136 00:04:39,737 --> 00:04:41,646 But once BGE signs you, 137 00:04:41,671 --> 00:04:43,154 there are no more baskets. 138 00:04:43,179 --> 00:04:44,697 Because they don't care about you. 139 00:04:44,733 --> 00:04:47,233 All they care about are numbers. 140 00:04:47,269 --> 00:04:49,035 But you, Donovan, 141 00:04:49,070 --> 00:04:51,871 you are my first priority. 142 00:04:51,906 --> 00:04:53,724 So when you're with me, 143 00:04:53,749 --> 00:04:56,054 you will never feel neglected. 144 00:04:56,079 --> 00:04:58,011 Just tell me what you need. I got you. 145 00:04:58,046 --> 00:04:59,512 I need someone to help me get better 146 00:04:59,547 --> 00:05:01,514 at tricks on my motorcycle. 147 00:05:01,549 --> 00:05:03,282 Sure. 148 00:05:04,353 --> 00:05:06,219 Mmm. 149 00:05:06,254 --> 00:05:08,071 I really hate these things. I just can't stop eating 'em. 150 00:05:08,096 --> 00:05:09,422 I got to say, the taste is average, 151 00:05:09,457 --> 00:05:11,924 but the aftertaste is outstanding. 152 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,683 What happens when I'm just an outstanding aftertaste? 153 00:05:14,708 --> 00:05:15,755 Hmm? 154 00:05:15,780 --> 00:05:18,231 When I move out, are you guys gonna forget about me like Coach? 155 00:05:18,266 --> 00:05:20,781 This loft is what tethers us together. 156 00:05:20,806 --> 00:05:22,807 And once it's gone, 157 00:05:22,832 --> 00:05:24,636 we're gonna be spread across the Earth 158 00:05:24,661 --> 00:05:26,039 like Rod Stewart's offspring. 159 00:05:26,074 --> 00:05:28,698 What I'm gonna miss most about you is all this poetry. 160 00:05:28,723 --> 00:05:29,800 No, no, no. You know what, 161 00:05:29,825 --> 00:05:31,749 do not give up on us already. 162 00:05:31,774 --> 00:05:34,069 We just need to find something that keeps us together. 163 00:05:34,094 --> 00:05:35,719 Like a dark secret or a time-share. 164 00:05:35,744 --> 00:05:37,550 You know, it was easier when men went to war. 165 00:05:37,585 --> 00:05:39,719 You'd forge an unbreakable bond 166 00:05:39,744 --> 00:05:41,500 in a crucible of blood and pain. 167 00:05:41,525 --> 00:05:44,516 You can't get that splitting the cost of toilet paper. 168 00:05:44,541 --> 00:05:46,726 We just need to come up with some sort of ritual. 169 00:05:46,761 --> 00:05:47,794 Yes! Now you're thinking. 170 00:05:47,829 --> 00:05:49,562 We stand in a circle, right? 171 00:05:49,597 --> 00:05:52,465 - We burn chicken bones, all right? - Dear Lord, Winston. 172 00:05:52,500 --> 00:05:53,966 - Then we're just secretive about it. - This is the wrong ritual... 173 00:05:54,002 --> 00:05:55,268 I'm just saying no one knows about it. 174 00:05:55,303 --> 00:05:57,460 - I didn't literally mean a ritual. - Oh. 175 00:05:57,485 --> 00:06:00,351 I just mean, like, a shared experience, one that bonds us together. 176 00:06:00,376 --> 00:06:02,825 I've been saying this for the longest time, but I'm really ready 177 00:06:02,850 --> 00:06:05,334 to get super weird into metal detectors if you guys are. 178 00:06:05,359 --> 00:06:07,680 - That's, sure, that's one idea. - You can look for treasure. 179 00:06:07,716 --> 00:06:09,248 Nickels, dimes, quarters. 180 00:06:09,284 --> 00:06:10,516 If you find enough, um, 181 00:06:10,552 --> 00:06:12,352 said treasure or change, 182 00:06:12,387 --> 00:06:13,953 supplement your income. 183 00:06:13,988 --> 00:06:15,288 It's also entertaining. 184 00:06:15,323 --> 00:06:18,091 While looking, there's, uh, an endorphin rush. 185 00:06:18,126 --> 00:06:20,569 It's entertainment, it's income... uh, ritual. 186 00:06:20,594 --> 00:06:22,974 Why don't we get tracksuits and play chess at the park? 187 00:06:22,999 --> 00:06:24,330 I already got a chess crew. 188 00:06:27,369 --> 00:06:29,635 You do that right outside of the loft? 189 00:06:29,671 --> 00:06:31,575 - Yeah, right outside the loft. - How have I never seen you once? 190 00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,317 'Cause you don't go outside of the loft. 191 00:06:33,544 --> 00:06:34,808 That's just not true. 192 00:06:34,833 --> 00:06:37,364 Fellas, fellas, fellas, I got it. 193 00:06:37,389 --> 00:06:38,841 Yeah? Metal detectors? 194 00:06:40,315 --> 00:06:42,160 That's a super cool idea, man. 195 00:06:42,185 --> 00:06:44,881 I appreciate the idea. I want to hear more about it. 196 00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:47,513 I feel like I'm being teased. 197 00:06:51,351 --> 00:06:53,161 Let me guess, you guys are pre-gaming 198 00:06:53,186 --> 00:06:54,827 before your high school reunion. 199 00:06:54,866 --> 00:06:57,334 You were nerds, but you grew up to be super handsome. 200 00:06:57,369 --> 00:06:58,602 You were cool but approachable. 201 00:06:58,637 --> 00:07:00,103 Maybe you were rollerbladers... 202 00:07:00,138 --> 00:07:01,438 Okay. Here's the deal. 203 00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:02,646 You're all models now, 204 00:07:02,674 --> 00:07:03,881 and that's your new manager. 205 00:07:03,906 --> 00:07:06,042 H-hold on a sec. There's only one number on this card, 206 00:07:06,078 --> 00:07:07,777 and there's two of you. 207 00:07:07,846 --> 00:07:09,279 Oh. 208 00:07:09,314 --> 00:07:10,780 You think we're trying to pick you up, 209 00:07:10,816 --> 00:07:12,616 because we're at a bar and we're telling you 210 00:07:12,651 --> 00:07:14,299 how handsome you are. 211 00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:16,186 Excuse me. 212 00:07:16,221 --> 00:07:17,554 You're hot, and you're about to make 213 00:07:17,589 --> 00:07:18,855 the easiest decision of your life. 214 00:07:18,890 --> 00:07:19,889 Not interested. 215 00:07:26,231 --> 00:07:28,164 Don't tell me. Only child, right? 216 00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:30,338 I guess now I am. 217 00:07:31,336 --> 00:07:33,072 As of yesterday. 218 00:07:35,173 --> 00:07:37,307 Sorry, did you... did you... 219 00:07:37,342 --> 00:07:39,277 It's loud. Did you hear what I, I said? 220 00:07:39,302 --> 00:07:40,626 I said you were hot. 221 00:07:40,651 --> 00:07:41,986 Um, have you ever thought about modeling? 222 00:07:42,011 --> 00:07:44,014 Lady, you can't treat me like a piece of meat. 223 00:07:44,049 --> 00:07:46,583 Now, I know I'm hot, but I don't need your validation. 224 00:07:46,618 --> 00:07:48,374 We're trying to have a serious conversation here 225 00:07:48,399 --> 00:07:50,153 about why the bees have disappeared. 226 00:07:52,724 --> 00:07:55,525 If a couple of guys in a bar can't figure it out, who will? 227 00:08:07,539 --> 00:08:08,838 So, how'd you do? 228 00:08:08,874 --> 00:08:10,566 Got a couple irons in the fire, so... 229 00:08:10,591 --> 00:08:13,291 Me, too, me, too. Planted a couple seeds, 230 00:08:13,316 --> 00:08:14,744 just waiting for the harvest. 231 00:08:14,780 --> 00:08:16,402 Hey! Hey, you. 232 00:08:16,427 --> 00:08:17,514 Stop what you're doing right now. 233 00:08:17,549 --> 00:08:18,682 What? I'm sorry. 234 00:08:18,717 --> 00:08:19,716 That's just how I walk. 235 00:08:19,751 --> 00:08:21,051 If I don't swing my arms, 236 00:08:21,086 --> 00:08:23,009 I start thinking I'm standing, and I'll fall. 237 00:08:23,034 --> 00:08:24,476 Oh... 238 00:08:24,501 --> 00:08:26,556 Tell me, do you have any modeling experience? 239 00:08:26,591 --> 00:08:29,125 I was trapped in a window display in a department store once, 240 00:08:29,161 --> 00:08:30,560 and I was on the news a lot. 241 00:08:31,082 --> 00:08:33,957 Are we talking local or national news? 242 00:08:33,982 --> 00:08:35,398 Oh, that's a good question. 243 00:08:35,434 --> 00:08:37,183 Um... 244 00:08:39,135 --> 00:08:41,418 I think... sorry... what my friend is trying to say 245 00:08:41,443 --> 00:08:44,107 is that it sounds like you have on-camera experience, 246 00:08:44,142 --> 00:08:46,042 and if you would like, we can hook you up 247 00:08:46,078 --> 00:08:48,737 with a top talent manager who could get you an audition today. 248 00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:50,880 I do like hooking my thumb into my belt loops, 249 00:08:50,916 --> 00:08:51,981 and pulling my pants down... 250 00:08:52,017 --> 00:08:53,483 Yeah. No. Don't do it now. 251 00:08:53,518 --> 00:08:54,922 But it is called "The Cowboy." 252 00:08:54,947 --> 00:08:56,986 And I can see it's not your first rodeo. 253 00:08:57,022 --> 00:08:59,556 Okay. Uh, your new manager's name is Cece. 254 00:08:59,591 --> 00:09:01,015 Go to that address. 255 00:09:02,389 --> 00:09:04,328 Thanks. Okay. 256 00:09:07,148 --> 00:09:08,732 No, don't say it. 257 00:09:08,767 --> 00:09:09,836 - We're a team. - No. 258 00:09:09,861 --> 00:09:11,134 I'm the bait, you're the hook. 259 00:09:11,161 --> 00:09:13,914 I don't think the bait usually thinks of the hook as its teammate. 260 00:09:13,939 --> 00:09:15,898 That's such a hook thing to say. 261 00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:17,440 You're such a hook. 262 00:09:18,513 --> 00:09:19,982 You know... 263 00:09:20,007 --> 00:09:22,846 I've always wanted to have a boys spa day. 264 00:09:24,925 --> 00:09:26,636 Nick, did you wear your shirt during the massage? 265 00:09:26,661 --> 00:09:28,351 I did, but no bottoms. 266 00:09:28,386 --> 00:09:29,903 - It was liberating. - Good for you. 267 00:09:29,928 --> 00:09:33,131 Check this out. These cucumbers are gratis. 268 00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:34,560 I'm gonna make some pickles. 269 00:09:34,585 --> 00:09:36,659 If you're impressed by a couple of free cucumbers, 270 00:09:36,695 --> 00:09:38,294 get ready to have your blind blown, 271 00:09:38,330 --> 00:09:40,248 'cause I signed us up for the elite package. 272 00:09:40,273 --> 00:09:41,877 Does that mean the pickle's already pickled? 273 00:09:41,910 --> 00:09:44,291 - Gentlemen, eucalyptus towels? - Thank you. 274 00:09:44,316 --> 00:09:46,447 Oh, yeah... uh, mine's already wet! 275 00:09:46,472 --> 00:09:48,869 No, no, no, it's for smelling, not drying. 276 00:09:48,894 --> 00:09:51,252 - Oh. - Put it up to your face, smell it. 277 00:09:51,307 --> 00:09:53,710 Mmm. How could a smell be both hot and cold 278 00:09:53,753 --> 00:09:55,098 at the same time, I ask. 279 00:09:55,123 --> 00:09:56,880 - It's nice. - Ooh, this place is dope. 280 00:09:56,915 --> 00:09:58,535 Man, I feel very Roman. 281 00:09:58,560 --> 00:10:00,579 Boys, I think we found our ritual. 282 00:10:00,604 --> 00:10:02,218 Yeah, we did. 283 00:10:02,254 --> 00:10:05,304 If you gentlemen are ready, I can take you to your Brazilians. 284 00:10:05,329 --> 00:10:07,223 Sounds very fun. 285 00:10:07,259 --> 00:10:09,659 - I'm in a relationship, myself. - Yeah. 286 00:10:09,694 --> 00:10:11,060 Uh, but I would love to look. 287 00:10:11,096 --> 00:10:12,389 Just point me to the door, please. 288 00:10:12,414 --> 00:10:14,420 Sir. The elite package at S'Pa 289 00:10:14,445 --> 00:10:17,819 includes the wax removal of hair from your nether regions. 290 00:10:21,623 --> 00:10:22,908 What did you say, homeboy? 291 00:10:22,933 --> 00:10:24,634 Scrotum wax. 292 00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:30,244 No, Schmidt. 293 00:10:30,892 --> 00:10:33,249 - Say something. - Say something to him. 294 00:10:35,556 --> 00:10:36,586 Donovan. 295 00:10:36,621 --> 00:10:37,921 I have some very good news. 296 00:10:37,956 --> 00:10:40,424 I have a brand-new client 297 00:10:40,449 --> 00:10:42,424 that I am very excited for you to meet. 298 00:10:42,449 --> 00:10:44,952 - I'm Dean and I'm a model. - Mm-hmm. 299 00:10:45,998 --> 00:10:47,398 But I'm a model. 300 00:10:47,423 --> 00:10:48,670 - No. I'm a model. - Yeah, both models. 301 00:10:48,695 --> 00:10:51,085 - No. I'm a model. - No. I-I am a model. 302 00:10:51,110 --> 00:10:52,858 I am... I'm the model. 303 00:10:52,883 --> 00:10:54,737 - But, like, I'm, but I model. - I'm a model. 304 00:10:54,762 --> 00:10:55,557 - I model. - You... 305 00:10:55,582 --> 00:10:57,096 - I'm a model. - I just told... I'm a model. 306 00:10:57,121 --> 00:10:58,775 - Astro Fuel. - I model. 307 00:10:58,810 --> 00:11:00,610 What the heck is going on? 308 00:11:00,645 --> 00:11:02,955 Well, Cece's Boys is growing, 309 00:11:02,980 --> 00:11:04,916 so I'm just gonna help Dean make a résumé 310 00:11:04,941 --> 00:11:06,683 for the big audition we're all gonna go on. 311 00:11:06,718 --> 00:11:08,517 - What about my résumé? - You already have a résumé. 312 00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,556 Well, I-I-I want another one. 313 00:11:10,581 --> 00:11:12,387 - And another sandwich. - I want a sandwich, too. 314 00:11:12,412 --> 00:11:13,714 Stop copying me! 315 00:11:13,739 --> 00:11:16,259 Donovan. Dean. 316 00:11:19,209 --> 00:11:21,209 Um... 317 00:11:21,234 --> 00:11:22,632 Hmm. 318 00:11:24,418 --> 00:11:25,432 No... 319 00:11:25,457 --> 00:11:26,854 The line between what we're doing 320 00:11:26,879 --> 00:11:29,190 and being creepy is so thin. 321 00:11:29,241 --> 00:11:30,552 Hey, Cece, what's up? 322 00:11:30,577 --> 00:11:32,041 Any luck? The audition's in an hour, 323 00:11:32,077 --> 00:11:33,243 I'm getting kind of panicky. 324 00:11:33,278 --> 00:11:34,811 Yeah. Totally. Um... 325 00:11:34,846 --> 00:11:38,013 we're just looking for that perfect Cece's Boys type, you know... 326 00:11:38,414 --> 00:11:39,508 - perfect. - Ow! 327 00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:41,397 I don't know hair this short can get so tangled! 328 00:11:41,422 --> 00:11:42,437 - Okay? - You're hurting me. 329 00:11:42,462 --> 00:11:43,632 - I'm very sorry. - Cece, I don't know 330 00:11:43,656 --> 00:11:44,955 how many buttons to do on my shirt. 331 00:11:44,991 --> 00:11:46,123 Donovan, please. 332 00:11:46,158 --> 00:11:47,620 Look, Jess. 333 00:11:48,594 --> 00:11:50,127 If you haven't found anyone by now, 334 00:11:50,162 --> 00:11:52,263 maybe I should just cut my losses. 335 00:11:52,432 --> 00:11:53,998 Maybe I should just tell them I only... 336 00:11:54,033 --> 00:11:55,966 No, no, no, no, no. We actually, um... 337 00:11:55,993 --> 00:11:57,659 we have two guys, we'll... 338 00:11:57,703 --> 00:12:00,004 - You do? Oh! - ... bring them right over. 339 00:12:00,039 --> 00:12:01,906 You are the best. Thank you! 340 00:12:02,886 --> 00:12:03,858 I'm sorry? 341 00:12:05,483 --> 00:12:06,610 I'm gonna be honest. 342 00:12:06,646 --> 00:12:08,312 I don't know what I'm looking for. 343 00:12:08,347 --> 00:12:10,954 Oh, it-it's the other one. 344 00:12:11,024 --> 00:12:12,868 - No. - They have a real look. 345 00:12:12,893 --> 00:12:14,118 What look would that be? 346 00:12:14,153 --> 00:12:15,519 I own my own dog-walking company? 347 00:12:15,554 --> 00:12:16,854 Branding! 348 00:12:16,889 --> 00:12:17,855 You're good. 349 00:12:17,890 --> 00:12:19,690 You know what? I believe in them. 350 00:12:19,725 --> 00:12:22,593 And we also have no other choice. 351 00:12:22,628 --> 00:12:24,093 So let's get them camera-ready. 352 00:12:24,118 --> 00:12:25,695 How far away is that camera gonna be? 353 00:12:34,062 --> 00:12:36,329 Okay, guys, let's go... Oh, hey, Kirby. 354 00:12:36,365 --> 00:12:37,864 Looking good. 355 00:12:37,900 --> 00:12:39,045 That is for cats. 356 00:12:39,070 --> 00:12:40,850 But it's okay. Put this on. 357 00:12:40,875 --> 00:12:42,584 They're from my roommate's earthquake kit. 358 00:12:42,647 --> 00:12:44,113 He has a three-week supply. 359 00:12:44,149 --> 00:12:46,247 Bruce. Put this on. They won't recognize you 360 00:12:46,272 --> 00:12:48,084 on your next volunteer shift at the hospital. 361 00:12:48,119 --> 00:12:49,898 Ah. Jess. 362 00:12:49,923 --> 00:12:51,304 Hallway. 363 00:12:51,890 --> 00:12:54,349 Okay, are you absolutely sure 364 00:12:54,374 --> 00:12:55,591 that this is the way to go? 365 00:12:55,627 --> 00:12:59,262 Can't we get our hands on, like, a water polo team? 366 00:12:59,287 --> 00:13:01,431 Or hire escorts? 367 00:13:01,466 --> 00:13:03,459 Or call in a bomb threat to the audition. 368 00:13:03,484 --> 00:13:05,068 In this political environment? 369 00:13:05,103 --> 00:13:06,602 Oh, I'm nervous even saying it. 370 00:13:06,638 --> 00:13:08,171 - What about nothing? - No! 371 00:13:08,206 --> 00:13:11,407 Is nothing maybe the right thing to do in this situation? 372 00:13:11,443 --> 00:13:13,910 We can't bail on Cece. This is her shot. 373 00:13:13,935 --> 00:13:15,378 We can't let her become irrelevant 374 00:13:15,413 --> 00:13:17,947 like chunky belts, or quoting Borat. 375 00:13:17,990 --> 00:13:19,692 Okay. Well, if I have to go down with the ship, 376 00:13:19,717 --> 00:13:20,856 I'm not going down without a fight. 377 00:13:20,881 --> 00:13:22,819 And those two are gonna need a lot more 378 00:13:22,854 --> 00:13:24,497 than hair gel and V-necks. 379 00:13:24,522 --> 00:13:26,488 They're gonna need motorcycle boots, 380 00:13:26,524 --> 00:13:29,091 scarves, knit caps, 381 00:13:29,126 --> 00:13:31,660 and all the eye makeup that Schmidt's got. 382 00:13:31,695 --> 00:13:33,462 Cece? 383 00:13:33,950 --> 00:13:35,483 Hello? 384 00:13:36,534 --> 00:13:37,833 Cece? 385 00:13:39,238 --> 00:13:40,361 What are you doing in here? 386 00:13:40,386 --> 00:13:41,937 Donovan told me to wait here in your break room 387 00:13:41,972 --> 00:13:43,158 - and then he left. - What?! 388 00:13:43,183 --> 00:13:45,422 And I couldn't open the door and it was really dark. 389 00:13:45,447 --> 00:13:47,676 Donovan, get in here right now! 390 00:13:48,688 --> 00:13:50,954 Donovan, we have an audition in an hour 391 00:13:50,979 --> 00:13:52,610 and you lock Dean in a closet? 392 00:13:52,635 --> 00:13:54,449 Well, you said I was your number one client. 393 00:13:54,477 --> 00:13:55,635 Okay. No. Wait, Donovan. 394 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,314 - I'm out of here. - Just calm down. Wait. 395 00:13:58,656 --> 00:14:01,156 I went the wrong way. Don't look. 396 00:14:01,521 --> 00:14:02,701 So, what are we thinking? 397 00:14:02,726 --> 00:14:04,526 I don't know. Maybe they give you something to bite down on. 398 00:14:04,562 --> 00:14:05,748 No, I'm talking about leaving! 399 00:14:05,773 --> 00:14:06,969 You're being so dramatic right now. 400 00:14:06,994 --> 00:14:08,005 I don't think I'm being dramatic. 401 00:14:08,030 --> 00:14:09,897 Look, I'll say it now without any drama. 402 00:14:10,190 --> 00:14:13,546 I don't want the hairs ripped off my testicles by a stranger. 403 00:14:13,571 --> 00:14:14,796 I think they're there for a reason. 404 00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:16,538 They are trained professionals in there. 405 00:14:16,574 --> 00:14:19,332 This isn't gonna be some back-alley sack waxing. 406 00:14:19,357 --> 00:14:20,723 They have those? 407 00:14:20,748 --> 00:14:23,015 I'm sure they do, but this isn't one of them. 408 00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:24,446 Who would go to that one? 409 00:14:24,481 --> 00:14:26,703 Well, sometimes, in an emergency, 410 00:14:26,728 --> 00:14:28,135 you got to do what you got to do. 411 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,611 What would the emergency ever be? 412 00:14:29,636 --> 00:14:32,064 Nick, this is gonna be like cottage cheese all over again. 413 00:14:32,089 --> 00:14:33,855 At first, you're gonna be kicking and screaming, 414 00:14:33,891 --> 00:14:35,023 saying that you don't want to try it, 415 00:14:35,059 --> 00:14:36,573 but I'm telling you, in the end, 416 00:14:36,628 --> 00:14:38,661 you're gonna tell everybody that you meet how much you loved it. 417 00:14:38,697 --> 00:14:40,940 - This is nothing like cottage cheese. - Exactly like cottage cheese. 418 00:14:40,965 --> 00:14:43,532 Guys, I have off-the-charts follicle strength, okay? 419 00:14:43,572 --> 00:14:46,413 It'll be a blood bath down there, a real crime scene, 420 00:14:46,438 --> 00:14:47,470 so I'm leaning, "No." 421 00:14:47,506 --> 00:14:49,172 I'm out! Like my mother says 422 00:14:49,207 --> 00:14:50,804 at every party she goes to, 423 00:14:50,829 --> 00:14:53,633 "No one touches my purse." 424 00:14:53,658 --> 00:14:55,718 - Good day. - Wait. Sit. Sit down. 425 00:14:55,743 --> 00:14:57,439 You guys don't need to leave. 426 00:14:57,464 --> 00:15:00,118 Just a minute ago, you were saying how much you love this place. 427 00:15:00,143 --> 00:15:02,642 Just don't get your sack waxed. 428 00:15:02,667 --> 00:15:04,938 Okay, I don't care how big the park is. 429 00:15:04,963 --> 00:15:06,930 If there is a loose bear in it, 430 00:15:06,955 --> 00:15:08,555 I'm not going in the park! 431 00:15:08,580 --> 00:15:10,290 I'm never going in that park again! 432 00:15:10,315 --> 00:15:12,228 - I'm never going in again! - But this is our ritual! 433 00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:13,191 Schmidt, we'll just find a new one. 434 00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,326 Easy for you to say. 435 00:15:14,361 --> 00:15:17,028 You two guys are still gonna be living together in the loft, 436 00:15:17,064 --> 00:15:18,797 saying, "Oh, oh, I'm sorry. 437 00:15:18,832 --> 00:15:20,799 "I didn't know you were in here in the bathroom." 438 00:15:20,834 --> 00:15:23,803 And coming up with clever names for the Wi-Fi network 439 00:15:23,828 --> 00:15:26,073 - like, "This Is 4D." - That's pretty good. 440 00:15:26,098 --> 00:15:28,306 I'd say we just... let's agree right now to switch it to that. 441 00:15:28,342 --> 00:15:30,108 Points is, is your lives are going to go on, 442 00:15:30,143 --> 00:15:33,713 and I'll just always be that weirdo you once lived with. 443 00:15:36,957 --> 00:15:38,723 So you know what? 444 00:15:39,006 --> 00:15:42,356 I am gonna get my sack waxed. 445 00:15:42,381 --> 00:15:44,627 So enjoy the rest of your lives together. 446 00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,452 I'm gonna go shuck this corn. 447 00:15:47,394 --> 00:15:49,294 Oh, man. 448 00:15:49,363 --> 00:15:51,616 Hey, do you think they'll take a picture of him 449 00:15:51,641 --> 00:15:53,710 just as they rip like they do on roller coasters? 450 00:15:53,735 --> 00:15:56,067 I think you missed the point of what just happened. 451 00:16:04,311 --> 00:16:05,477 Did you just see that? 452 00:16:05,512 --> 00:16:06,495 No. I had my eyes closed. 453 00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:08,013 I was saying a non-denominational prayer 454 00:16:08,048 --> 00:16:09,414 for Bruce and Kirby. What did I miss? 455 00:16:09,449 --> 00:16:12,220 That woman just checked out our guys. 456 00:16:12,245 --> 00:16:15,651 Like, she-she really checked them out. 457 00:16:15,676 --> 00:16:17,691 Maybe we have a chance. I don't know. 458 00:16:17,730 --> 00:16:19,363 - Did you hear what you just said? - What? 459 00:16:19,398 --> 00:16:20,891 You said, "Our guys." 460 00:16:20,978 --> 00:16:23,437 - Okay, let's just go in. - Our guys! 461 00:16:23,473 --> 00:16:25,439 - Don't get sentimental. - Our guys. 462 00:16:25,475 --> 00:16:26,841 Oh, you get off of me. 463 00:16:26,876 --> 00:16:28,242 Our guys! 464 00:16:44,739 --> 00:16:46,113 Jess, I asked for models, 465 00:16:46,138 --> 00:16:48,714 not a couple of driver's ed instructors! 466 00:16:48,740 --> 00:16:51,370 I know, Cece, but they're hot on the inside. 467 00:16:51,395 --> 00:16:54,099 Bruce teaches CPR to children with irregular mouths, 468 00:16:54,124 --> 00:16:57,038 and Kirby has given so much bone marrow, they told him to stop. 469 00:16:57,063 --> 00:16:58,893 I don't know how that's gonna help them 470 00:16:58,929 --> 00:17:00,395 at a print ad audition. 471 00:17:00,430 --> 00:17:01,896 You're right, she's right. 472 00:17:01,932 --> 00:17:03,647 I don't know what we were thinking. 473 00:17:03,672 --> 00:17:05,500 Let's go put these dogs down. 474 00:17:05,535 --> 00:17:07,272 Why did we even give them names? 475 00:17:07,297 --> 00:17:08,403 They came with names. 476 00:17:08,438 --> 00:17:09,671 Right, I guess what I meant 477 00:17:09,706 --> 00:17:11,936 is why did we bothering learning them. 478 00:17:14,156 --> 00:17:17,675 Guys, uh, there's been a little hiccup. 479 00:17:17,781 --> 00:17:20,281 - We're allowed to eat all these, right? - I just love them. 480 00:17:20,317 --> 00:17:23,913 Yeah, you guys can keep eating. Um, 481 00:17:23,938 --> 00:17:26,305 so, there's no way to sugarcoat this, 482 00:17:26,330 --> 00:17:27,455 but the truth is... 483 00:17:28,985 --> 00:17:30,024 Wait, wait, wait... 484 00:17:30,060 --> 00:17:31,893 - So gross, right? - Ooh, nasty! 485 00:17:31,928 --> 00:17:35,124 Cece? Cece, come here. 486 00:17:35,546 --> 00:17:37,679 - What? - Look around this room. 487 00:17:38,503 --> 00:17:41,080 Nobody's eating these things but them. 488 00:17:42,512 --> 00:17:43,844 Oh, my God, yes! 489 00:17:43,876 --> 00:17:45,102 And they love them. 490 00:17:45,127 --> 00:17:46,474 It almost makes me want to try them. 491 00:17:46,509 --> 00:17:49,110 And I emphasize "almost." 492 00:17:49,145 --> 00:17:51,157 They're making a mistake. 493 00:17:53,233 --> 00:17:57,048 These are the guys that can sell this stuff. 494 00:17:57,118 --> 00:17:58,653 Not these guys. 495 00:17:58,688 --> 00:18:00,930 But they've already decided on the direction of the ad. 496 00:18:00,955 --> 00:18:02,750 So tell them to change it! 497 00:18:02,775 --> 00:18:05,175 I mean, what have you got to lose? 498 00:18:12,596 --> 00:18:14,002 Hey, Joy. 499 00:18:14,925 --> 00:18:16,103 I'm scared. 500 00:18:16,128 --> 00:18:18,173 - Don't you be scared, kid! - Nick? 501 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:20,231 - We're here with you, buddy! - Winston! 502 00:18:20,256 --> 00:18:22,076 We don't need a ritual, Schmidt, 503 00:18:22,112 --> 00:18:24,254 'cause you're not gonna lose us. 504 00:18:24,348 --> 00:18:25,989 I thought we could've just told you that, 505 00:18:26,014 --> 00:18:28,273 but Winston thought we needed to show it. 506 00:18:28,298 --> 00:18:29,717 Yeah, I thought that would be better. 507 00:18:29,753 --> 00:18:31,986 You know, it makes more sense to me. 508 00:18:32,022 --> 00:18:33,851 - Band of brothers. - Band of brothers! 509 00:18:33,876 --> 00:18:35,741 That's right, man. Band of brothers, bro. 510 00:18:35,766 --> 00:18:37,077 Band of brothers. 511 00:18:38,975 --> 00:18:41,863 You know, I've been a little bit curious about it this whole time. 512 00:18:41,898 --> 00:18:43,194 I just couldn't admit it to you guys, you know? 513 00:18:43,219 --> 00:18:44,553 I think this would be more dignified 514 00:18:44,578 --> 00:18:45,710 if we did it in silence. 515 00:18:45,735 --> 00:18:46,905 - Of course. - Yeah, let's do this in silence. 516 00:18:46,930 --> 00:18:48,951 - Good luck, guys. - I'm ready for you, lady. 517 00:18:48,976 --> 00:18:51,506 Three friends going on the same silent journey, 518 00:18:51,541 --> 00:18:53,341 together, yet separate, 519 00:18:53,376 --> 00:18:55,507 alone, yet closer than ever. 520 00:18:56,946 --> 00:18:58,680 - Nick? - I'm all right! 521 00:19:00,265 --> 00:19:01,796 - Winston? - Can you hear me, Schmidt?! 522 00:19:01,821 --> 00:19:03,618 You hang in there, you son of a... 523 00:19:03,653 --> 00:19:05,586 Aah! This woman's ripping it off! 524 00:19:10,942 --> 00:19:13,456 Ooh! That's actually kind of warm. Ouch! 525 00:19:13,481 --> 00:19:14,962 No! Okay, time out, time out, time out, time out, 526 00:19:14,998 --> 00:19:16,724 time out, time out, time out, time out, time out! 527 00:19:26,142 --> 00:19:27,608 No, no, no! No! 528 00:19:40,256 --> 00:19:41,556 Oh! 529 00:19:47,369 --> 00:19:49,650 How many times do you freakin' do it?! 530 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,711 Okay, good. You both are here. 531 00:19:53,736 --> 00:19:56,070 So, guess who got the Sausage Crunchies job. 532 00:19:56,106 --> 00:19:58,100 - Oh, yay, Kirby! - Hey, Kirby! 533 00:19:58,125 --> 00:20:00,270 Not Kirby, but I am going to hang on to him. 534 00:20:00,295 --> 00:20:03,511 I think he could book ads for both fast food and anti-depressants. 535 00:20:03,546 --> 00:20:05,045 - Ah. - Bruce? 536 00:20:05,070 --> 00:20:06,080 They absolutely hated Bruce. 537 00:20:06,116 --> 00:20:08,090 He got sick during the audition. 538 00:20:08,115 --> 00:20:10,379 - Sausage Crunchies everywhere. - That's a lot. 539 00:20:10,404 --> 00:20:12,980 But they loved Dean! 540 00:20:13,005 --> 00:20:14,121 Mm. 541 00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:15,912 Oh, it's nice to see the good guys win. 542 00:20:15,937 --> 00:20:19,694 Right?! They said I brought them the best and the worst of the day, 543 00:20:19,729 --> 00:20:22,294 so... maybe that's my thing. 544 00:20:22,319 --> 00:20:23,287 Hmm. 545 00:20:23,312 --> 00:20:25,967 Can I throw out this, uh, soggy bag of cucumbers? 546 00:20:26,002 --> 00:20:27,135 No! 547 00:20:27,170 --> 00:20:28,604 Those are pickles in progress. 548 00:20:29,818 --> 00:20:31,207 Um, I don't mean to be mean, 549 00:20:31,232 --> 00:20:33,347 but you guys are being real babies about this whole thing. 550 00:20:33,402 --> 00:20:34,709 They don't... 551 00:20:34,744 --> 00:20:36,544 Until you've had your sack waxed, 552 00:20:36,579 --> 00:20:37,779 you can't know this pain. 553 00:20:37,814 --> 00:20:39,008 - Excuse me? - Childbirth? 554 00:20:39,033 --> 00:20:40,158 Weekly wax, top to tail. 555 00:20:40,183 --> 00:20:42,016 We went through hell, 556 00:20:42,048 --> 00:20:44,690 and we came out the other side, gentlemen. 557 00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:45,820 It was war. 558 00:20:45,855 --> 00:20:48,573 Granted, one that took place in a high end-spa, 559 00:20:48,598 --> 00:20:50,692 but still our war. 560 00:20:50,727 --> 00:20:51,838 That's right. 561 00:20:51,863 --> 00:20:53,327 I mean, this not something we do every week, right? 562 00:20:53,354 --> 00:20:54,674 - No, it's like a monthly thing. - Monthly? 563 00:20:54,699 --> 00:20:56,080 - Not a chance! - It's our ritual. 564 00:20:56,106 --> 00:20:57,877 No. No, no, no, no. One time only. 565 00:20:57,902 --> 00:21:00,299 Guys, how can it be a ritual if we only do it one time? 566 00:21:00,324 --> 00:21:03,058 Shut up, Schmidt! I will never go back! 567 00:21:09,278 --> 00:21:11,646 It's okay, man. We're gonna get metal detectors. 568 00:21:11,671 --> 00:21:15,466 Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb www.addic7ed.com