1 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:20,496 Guys, this has been fun, but... 2 00:00:20,563 --> 00:00:23,065 it's time to go start my pre-date regimen. 3 00:00:23,278 --> 00:00:26,480 ♪ Body wash is in the house tonight! ♪ 4 00:00:26,548 --> 00:00:28,749 Ugh, that jacket! What are you and Aly doing tonight... 5 00:00:28,817 --> 00:00:30,451 going to a Sinbad stand-up special? 6 00:00:30,518 --> 00:00:32,920 I'm gonna go pick up my colorblind glasses from USC. 7 00:00:32,987 --> 00:00:35,255 I'm a part of a study. Now, these glasses allow 8 00:00:35,323 --> 00:00:37,224 a colorblind person to see color. 9 00:00:37,292 --> 00:00:40,027 If they don't work, I get $25. 10 00:00:40,095 --> 00:00:43,764 If they do work, they're gonna take a bunch of my bone marrow. 11 00:00:43,832 --> 00:00:45,899 I just hope he puts on those glasses and realizes 12 00:00:45,967 --> 00:00:48,535 how truly hideous that Salt-N-Pepa jacket is. 13 00:00:48,603 --> 00:00:50,230 I mean, at least he stopped wearing the pants that go with it. 14 00:00:50,292 --> 00:00:52,206 Oh, my gosh, you guys, thank you so much 15 00:00:52,273 --> 00:00:53,707 for getting me out of the house tonight. 16 00:00:53,775 --> 00:00:55,409 Winston is insisting we... 17 00:00:55,477 --> 00:00:56,944 Stay in? Why are you staying in? 18 00:00:57,011 --> 00:01:00,047 Because I might be overwhelmed by the world beyond sharp brown. 19 00:01:00,115 --> 00:01:01,782 Dull brown. Brown. 20 00:01:01,850 --> 00:01:03,355 You know, Aly's making sherbet tonight 21 00:01:03,417 --> 00:01:04,417 if you guys want to come over. 22 00:01:04,488 --> 00:01:06,253 While the idea of witnessing you seeing sherbet 23 00:01:06,321 --> 00:01:10,504 for the first time is enticing, I have plans tonight. 24 00:01:10,566 --> 00:01:12,493 Ooh, I see that eyebrow waggle. 25 00:01:12,560 --> 00:01:14,294 Yeah, that means you going on a... 26 00:01:14,362 --> 00:01:16,453 Sex date! We are having sex tonight 27 00:01:16,516 --> 00:01:18,108 - out of our daughter's earshot. - Okay. 28 00:01:18,109 --> 00:01:21,368 Tell me, in the realm of Cece and Schmidt sex-capades, 29 00:01:21,436 --> 00:01:23,788 like, how far out are you going? 30 00:01:23,827 --> 00:01:26,233 Are you, like, crossing state lines or...? 31 00:01:26,258 --> 00:01:29,143 No. Tonight, we are actually gonna keep it simple. 32 00:01:29,210 --> 00:01:32,479 I have made extremely elaborate plans. 33 00:01:32,547 --> 00:01:34,537 I've lined up a babysitter, booked a hotel room, 34 00:01:34,576 --> 00:01:37,317 commissioned a new negligee, custom-made 35 00:01:37,385 --> 00:01:39,887 by a Japanese man that I found on EtsyXXX. 36 00:01:39,954 --> 00:01:43,123 - I can't wait for Cece to see me in it. - What? 37 00:01:43,191 --> 00:01:46,393 I think that he bought me some sort of Japanese negligee. 38 00:01:46,461 --> 00:01:47,694 I know. 39 00:01:47,762 --> 00:01:50,063 I found it, like, hidden in the back of the closet. 40 00:01:50,131 --> 00:01:52,091 I'm gonna need a team of people to get me into that. 41 00:01:52,138 --> 00:01:55,669 Winston once bought me a Canadian Mountie uniform. 42 00:01:55,737 --> 00:01:57,104 - No, he did not. - Not to be graphic, 43 00:01:57,172 --> 00:01:59,740 but he destroyed it in seconds. 44 00:01:59,807 --> 00:02:02,409 So, Jess, what are you up to tonight? 45 00:02:02,477 --> 00:02:03,844 Remember when Nick and I tried 46 00:02:03,912 --> 00:02:05,479 to adopt that dog and got rejected? 47 00:02:05,547 --> 00:02:07,848 I love you so much, Harriet. 48 00:02:07,916 --> 00:02:09,650 I'm never gonna put you down. 49 00:02:09,717 --> 00:02:11,518 I'm never gonna let you go. 50 00:02:11,586 --> 00:02:13,587 I still don't get this. They took a dog away 51 00:02:13,655 --> 00:02:15,522 from someone for loving it too much? 52 00:02:15,590 --> 00:02:20,227 They said my enthusiasm for Harriet bordered on... madness. 53 00:02:20,295 --> 00:02:21,662 Oh, I-I can see that. 54 00:02:21,729 --> 00:02:23,997 Well, it's been two long years on the wait list, but... 55 00:02:24,065 --> 00:02:25,866 Everything changes tonight. 56 00:02:25,934 --> 00:02:28,107 - I'm asking Jess to marry me. - Wow 57 00:02:28,154 --> 00:02:30,170 - Ha! - Tonight. 58 00:02:30,238 --> 00:02:31,505 Well, it's about time. 59 00:02:31,573 --> 00:02:33,140 You've been talking about this for a month. 60 00:02:33,208 --> 00:02:36,243 I don't need this from you. I get it enough from Jess's dad. 61 00:02:36,311 --> 00:02:38,512 Bob called me nine times today 62 00:02:38,580 --> 00:02:41,481 to tell me that his blessing expires at midnight. 63 00:02:41,549 --> 00:02:43,016 He said if I miss the deadline, 64 00:02:43,084 --> 00:02:44,685 my buttocks are gravy. 65 00:02:44,752 --> 00:02:46,553 Guy's got some weird expressions. 66 00:02:46,621 --> 00:02:49,323 Why would you wait till the last minute for something like this? 67 00:02:49,390 --> 00:02:51,158 'Cause everything has to be perfect; Jess is gonna 68 00:02:51,226 --> 00:02:53,160 think about this moment for the rest of our lives. 69 00:02:53,228 --> 00:02:54,962 I almost asked her at the park, 70 00:02:55,029 --> 00:02:56,863 but a squirrel ran off with our ring. 71 00:02:56,931 --> 00:02:58,665 Don't worry, I got the ring back, but let me 72 00:02:58,733 --> 00:03:00,667 just say this, the squirrel will never do that again. 73 00:03:00,735 --> 00:03:02,636 And then I got us on the kiss cam at Dodger Stadium. 74 00:03:02,704 --> 00:03:04,022 That's where I was gonna ask, but once we got on 75 00:03:04,076 --> 00:03:05,839 the scoreboard, I just went for the laugh 76 00:03:05,907 --> 00:03:07,474 and I kissed the old guy next to me. 77 00:03:07,542 --> 00:03:09,810 Anything's funny when you put an old man in it. 78 00:03:09,877 --> 00:03:11,311 Except for the ground. 79 00:03:11,379 --> 00:03:13,180 But this time, I have everything planned. 80 00:03:13,248 --> 00:03:14,915 Nothing's stopping me tonight. 81 00:03:14,983 --> 00:03:19,433 I made reservations at the same place we went on our first date. 82 00:03:19,512 --> 00:03:21,521 Finally, I'm gonna make an honest woman of... 83 00:03:21,589 --> 00:03:24,057 My new dog. I'm so excited. 84 00:03:24,125 --> 00:03:27,060 And I get to surprise Nick 'cause he doesn't know about it. 85 00:03:27,128 --> 00:03:29,061 Our family is growing 86 00:03:29,139 --> 00:03:31,967 - by four small paws. - Okay, whoa. 87 00:03:32,037 --> 00:03:33,325 You need to reel that back in, sweetheart. 88 00:03:33,401 --> 00:03:35,369 Okay, I think you're right. 89 00:03:35,436 --> 00:03:38,205 There is a fine line between enthusiasm and madness, 90 00:03:38,273 --> 00:03:40,440 and I do need to keep this in check. 91 00:03:40,508 --> 00:03:42,109 Come on, ladies. Let's toast to... 92 00:03:42,176 --> 00:03:44,244 - Nick and Jess. All right. - Yeah! 93 00:03:44,312 --> 00:03:46,681 And to us going on dates at the same time... 94 00:03:46,736 --> 00:03:48,582 ...leading to a high probability 95 00:03:48,650 --> 00:03:50,584 that we'll all be doing it at the same time. 96 00:03:50,652 --> 00:03:52,252 I'm not cheersing that, man. Stop. 97 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:54,688 - I think it's nice. - Yeah, it'll be like one big orgy, 98 00:03:54,756 --> 00:03:56,223 but, you know, we're spaced out. 99 00:03:56,291 --> 00:03:58,191 Never mind. I retract my support. 100 00:03:58,259 --> 00:04:01,428 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 101 00:04:03,097 --> 00:04:04,464 Who's hungry? I'm hungry. 102 00:04:04,532 --> 00:04:06,800 You ready for our reservation? We have a... 103 00:04:07,422 --> 00:04:08,789 What is all this, Jess? 104 00:04:08,838 --> 00:04:12,049 ♪ It's happening ♪ 105 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:14,182 ♪ It's happening! ♪ 106 00:04:14,245 --> 00:04:16,610 No. No. No. No. 107 00:04:16,678 --> 00:04:18,312 Allow me to practice being appropriately excited 108 00:04:18,379 --> 00:04:20,614 about the following information. 109 00:04:20,682 --> 00:04:22,382 - We're getting a dog. - Really? 110 00:04:22,450 --> 00:04:24,418 - Yeah. - We've waited two years for this. 111 00:04:24,485 --> 00:04:26,253 - This could be a really big deal for us. - Yeah. 112 00:04:26,321 --> 00:04:29,156 This could be the night that we welcome a new family member 113 00:04:29,223 --> 00:04:30,457 - into our home. I just... - Wow. 114 00:04:30,525 --> 00:04:32,326 I don't want to blow it, so you have to help me 115 00:04:32,393 --> 00:04:34,328 keep it together when Judith from the shelter gets here, 116 00:04:34,395 --> 00:04:35,796 'cause she has to do a home visit 117 00:04:35,863 --> 00:04:37,603 - before she signs off. - You're not gonna blow it. 118 00:04:37,658 --> 00:04:39,439 We will form a great game plan 119 00:04:39,501 --> 00:04:41,126 at dinner, so let's go now, 'cause we got 120 00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:42,158 - that reservation, like I was saying. - No. No. 121 00:04:42,212 --> 00:04:43,570 We have that reservation, like I was saying. 122 00:04:43,638 --> 00:04:44,905 We don't have time for dinner. 123 00:04:44,972 --> 00:04:46,306 She's gonna get here any minute. 124 00:04:46,374 --> 00:04:47,974 You know, last time, she was very thorough. 125 00:04:48,042 --> 00:04:49,343 - Yes. - It could take a long time. 126 00:04:49,410 --> 00:04:51,478 This is fine. This is foine. This is good. 127 00:04:51,546 --> 00:04:52,946 This is great. I'll push our reservation. 128 00:04:53,014 --> 00:04:55,015 I'll tell the restaurant we're celebrating tonight. 129 00:04:55,083 --> 00:04:57,484 We weren't before, but we are now. 130 00:04:57,552 --> 00:04:59,619 Get an outdoor table so we can bring our new puppy. 131 00:04:59,687 --> 00:05:02,789 - That's not the plan. - Say, "Make room." We got to bring... 132 00:05:02,857 --> 00:05:04,624 - The dog is not... - ...a dog, a dog bed, a water bowl... 133 00:05:04,692 --> 00:05:06,460 - Good talk. - ...some toys, some chewies. 134 00:05:10,264 --> 00:05:12,299 I got you some stuff. 135 00:05:12,367 --> 00:05:14,468 Oh, my gosh, you didn't... 136 00:05:14,535 --> 00:05:16,136 Will you look at this? 137 00:05:16,204 --> 00:05:18,772 Puzzles, a book on subway graffiti. 138 00:05:18,840 --> 00:05:21,007 Candy? 139 00:05:21,075 --> 00:05:22,252 - Mm-hmm. - Wait a minute. 140 00:05:22,276 --> 00:05:23,910 Baby, candy is different colors? 141 00:05:23,911 --> 00:05:25,150 That's what I've been trying to tell to you. 142 00:05:25,213 --> 00:05:27,147 Everything is different colors. 143 00:05:27,215 --> 00:05:30,650 Well, I'll see you on the other side. 144 00:05:37,291 --> 00:05:40,227 Oh, my God. 145 00:05:40,294 --> 00:05:43,330 Baby. Mm. 146 00:05:43,398 --> 00:05:45,432 Nobody told me fruit was different colors! 147 00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:48,135 - I thought you knew. - I didn't know about fruit, baby! 148 00:05:48,202 --> 00:05:50,604 - Now you know. - Ah! 149 00:05:50,671 --> 00:05:53,473 - Oh! This-this, uh, is purple. - That's right. 150 00:05:53,541 --> 00:05:54,708 - I'm touching purple? - Yeah. 151 00:05:54,776 --> 00:05:56,276 - I'm touching purple. - Oh, don't cry. 152 00:05:56,344 --> 00:05:58,345 No, don't cry, baby. 153 00:05:58,413 --> 00:06:00,480 - Are my socks blue? - Blue. 154 00:06:00,548 --> 00:06:02,549 - Your socks are blue. - I hate blue so much! 155 00:06:02,617 --> 00:06:05,352 - Calm down, baby. Okay. Okay. - Aah! Some more blue! Get that... 156 00:06:05,420 --> 00:06:07,354 Just calm down. Do you want me to find you 157 00:06:07,422 --> 00:06:08,889 something brown to look at? Would that be soothing? 158 00:06:08,956 --> 00:06:11,591 I just think I need to... I just need to take it slow. 159 00:06:11,659 --> 00:06:14,094 I am right here with you. Why don't we go sit on the couch? 160 00:06:14,162 --> 00:06:15,929 Baby, what color is that couch gonna be? 161 00:06:15,997 --> 00:06:18,532 Oh, don't make that a whole thing. 162 00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:27,674 Oh, I did not solve this Rubik's Cube. 163 00:06:27,742 --> 00:06:30,597 Help yourself to anything... within reason. 164 00:06:30,675 --> 00:06:31,678 You may think to yourself, 165 00:06:31,746 --> 00:06:33,380 "Oh, they have a lot of expensive cheeses. 166 00:06:33,448 --> 00:06:35,487 They won't notice." We wil notice. 167 00:06:35,573 --> 00:06:37,855 Okay, so, Ruth is asleep. 168 00:06:37,918 --> 00:06:40,086 That little face. I love her more every day. 169 00:06:40,154 --> 00:06:43,056 And, oh, look at you. 170 00:06:43,124 --> 00:06:45,559 Tell your genitals to get their affairs in order. 171 00:06:45,626 --> 00:06:48,595 Oh, my genitals know what they're getting into. 172 00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:53,733 Hey, I have really exciting news. 173 00:06:53,801 --> 00:06:56,937 I'm ovulating. It's time for another baby! 174 00:06:57,004 --> 00:06:59,272 Let's get to the hotel! 175 00:06:59,340 --> 00:07:00,841 We're so sorry to crash your date. 176 00:07:00,908 --> 00:07:02,827 Our hotel reservation fell through. 177 00:07:02,866 --> 00:07:04,671 Are you kidding me? I mean, I am so excited 178 00:07:04,741 --> 00:07:06,187 to have you guys here for my big day. 179 00:07:06,265 --> 00:07:07,632 Kind of wish you were here earlier. 180 00:07:07,710 --> 00:07:09,316 He was being a complete bitch about pink. 181 00:07:09,383 --> 00:07:10,717 No, I was not. I was confused, 182 00:07:10,785 --> 00:07:12,719 because they want to be red so bad, and I'm like, 183 00:07:12,787 --> 00:07:14,588 "You're not red. Like, stop." You know what I mean? 184 00:07:14,655 --> 00:07:16,656 Well, this is gonna be fun. 185 00:07:16,724 --> 00:07:19,092 - For a little while. - Or a long while. Who knows? 186 00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:20,393 Judith is gonna be here any minute, 187 00:07:20,461 --> 00:07:21,661 and I need you to test me. 188 00:07:21,729 --> 00:07:23,363 I looked up "cute dog" on the Internet, 189 00:07:23,431 --> 00:07:24,831 and I printed out a bunch of images, 190 00:07:24,899 --> 00:07:27,133 so I just need you to shove a cute dog in my face 191 00:07:27,201 --> 00:07:28,635 until I find something disgusting about it. 192 00:07:28,703 --> 00:07:29,769 I can do that. 193 00:07:30,436 --> 00:07:33,707 Oh. He's so teeny tiny... 194 00:07:33,774 --> 00:07:35,675 that he fits in his food bowl. 195 00:07:35,743 --> 00:07:36,843 And he climbed in. 196 00:07:36,911 --> 00:07:38,078 He wiggled around. 197 00:07:38,145 --> 00:07:40,780 He knocked all his food out. 198 00:07:40,848 --> 00:07:42,716 Which sucks, because there are so many 199 00:07:42,783 --> 00:07:44,618 starving people in the world. 200 00:07:44,685 --> 00:07:46,686 - Next dog. - Now we're talking. Good. 201 00:07:46,754 --> 00:07:49,422 I know what I hate, but I'm not sure what you're gonna hate. 202 00:07:49,490 --> 00:07:51,958 Oh, my God. 203 00:07:52,026 --> 00:07:54,027 I want to like this little lug. 204 00:07:54,095 --> 00:07:55,428 Jess, what do you hate about this dog? 205 00:07:55,496 --> 00:07:56,696 She's wearing a princess costume, 206 00:07:56,764 --> 00:07:58,644 which enforces gender stereotypes 207 00:07:58,707 --> 00:08:00,207 in a way that makes me feel uncomfortable. 208 00:08:00,293 --> 00:08:01,201 Next dog. 209 00:08:01,269 --> 00:08:03,336 I hate to do this one to you. 210 00:08:03,404 --> 00:08:04,638 No. 211 00:08:04,705 --> 00:08:09,009 No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 212 00:08:09,076 --> 00:08:10,477 What do you dislike strongly? 213 00:08:10,545 --> 00:08:12,145 Is this guy rocking a jean jacket? 214 00:08:12,213 --> 00:08:13,513 Unfortunately, yes. 215 00:08:13,581 --> 00:08:15,181 I don't hate that! 216 00:08:15,249 --> 00:08:16,182 Oh, my God. 217 00:08:16,250 --> 00:08:17,450 She's here. She's here. 218 00:08:17,518 --> 00:08:18,919 I feel ready. I feel ready. 219 00:08:18,986 --> 00:08:21,655 - Why are you acting so weird? - I'm not acting weird. 220 00:08:21,722 --> 00:08:23,056 Winston, will you come with me? 221 00:08:23,124 --> 00:08:25,559 I'd love to be the first person to show you a raincoat. 222 00:08:25,626 --> 00:08:27,694 I knew something was going on with raincoats. 223 00:08:27,762 --> 00:08:29,930 - Hmm. - Watch out. Excuse me, baby. 224 00:08:29,997 --> 00:08:32,666 What's wrong, Schmidt? You look green. Is it green? 225 00:08:32,733 --> 00:08:34,534 Cece wants to get pregnant again. 226 00:08:34,602 --> 00:08:35,702 Oh. 227 00:08:40,007 --> 00:08:41,341 Ms. Day, Mr. Miller. 228 00:08:41,409 --> 00:08:43,877 I'm hoping the second time's the charm. 229 00:08:43,945 --> 00:08:45,979 I'd like to introduce Mario. 230 00:08:46,047 --> 00:08:49,549 - Mario. - You're squeezing real hard, Jess. 231 00:08:49,617 --> 00:08:51,084 Your pictures don't do you justice. 232 00:08:51,152 --> 00:08:53,553 Will you excuse me a minute? 233 00:08:53,621 --> 00:08:55,722 Very excited. 234 00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:06,892 Cece wants to get pregnant? Isn't that good news? 235 00:09:06,940 --> 00:09:08,240 Don't you want, like, a hundred kids? 236 00:09:08,308 --> 00:09:10,009 Yes, I do. I just... 237 00:09:10,076 --> 00:09:13,312 How can I survive another nine months of pregnant Cece? 238 00:09:13,380 --> 00:09:15,614 She was so mean to me. 239 00:09:16,917 --> 00:09:18,851 I got your wings, my love. 240 00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:22,436 I wanted all flats, no drumlets! 241 00:09:22,510 --> 00:09:23,923 Do they look flat to you?! 242 00:09:23,990 --> 00:09:25,291 Do they look flat to you?! 243 00:09:25,358 --> 00:09:27,793 She tried to jam the business end of a drumlet 244 00:09:27,861 --> 00:09:29,228 straight up my tuchus. 245 00:09:29,296 --> 00:09:30,963 And then things got worse. 246 00:09:31,031 --> 00:09:33,566 I can only describe what I experienced next as... 247 00:09:33,633 --> 00:09:35,267 anti-Semitic. 248 00:09:35,335 --> 00:09:36,969 Hey, gefilte face! 249 00:09:37,037 --> 00:09:38,137 Quit playing "Where's My Foreskin?" 250 00:09:38,204 --> 00:09:39,905 and get in here and rub my feet 251 00:09:39,973 --> 00:09:43,075 before I divorce your Yentl-loving, Ashkenazi ass! 252 00:09:44,644 --> 00:09:46,412 I knew this day would come, but... 253 00:09:46,479 --> 00:09:48,113 just thought I had more time. 254 00:09:48,181 --> 00:09:49,281 Schmidt, you're being crazy, man. 255 00:09:49,349 --> 00:09:50,916 Just go talk to your wife about this. 256 00:09:50,984 --> 00:09:52,418 I can't do that. My only option is 257 00:09:52,485 --> 00:09:54,320 to knock her up and then disappear into the night. 258 00:09:54,387 --> 00:09:55,621 I'm gonna need you and Nick 259 00:09:55,689 --> 00:09:57,756 to take care of my family while I'm in hiding. 260 00:09:57,824 --> 00:09:59,091 Hey, be honest with her. 261 00:09:59,159 --> 00:10:00,593 Now, if you'll excuse me, 262 00:10:00,660 --> 00:10:03,796 I'm off to stare at my tongue in the mirror. 263 00:10:03,863 --> 00:10:05,931 So, as you can see, we have lots of toys 264 00:10:05,999 --> 00:10:07,366 for Mario to play with. 265 00:10:07,434 --> 00:10:11,003 And it looks like he's found one he enjoys. 266 00:10:11,071 --> 00:10:13,138 Look at that. 267 00:10:13,206 --> 00:10:15,240 - Good for him. - Can I just say, 268 00:10:15,308 --> 00:10:18,143 I had some serious doubts about you getting a dog from us 269 00:10:18,211 --> 00:10:19,712 after what happened last time. 270 00:10:19,779 --> 00:10:22,181 You had a real Of Mice and Men vibe. 271 00:10:22,248 --> 00:10:24,350 Did I? 272 00:10:24,417 --> 00:10:27,019 I mean, who gets emotional 273 00:10:27,087 --> 00:10:30,122 - over how cute a dog is, right? - Oh. 274 00:10:30,190 --> 00:10:32,758 People with something missing inside of them? 275 00:10:36,997 --> 00:10:39,131 Will you excuse me a minute? 276 00:10:39,199 --> 00:10:41,533 Mm-hmm. 277 00:10:41,601 --> 00:10:44,503 Hi, cutie. 278 00:10:44,571 --> 00:10:45,971 Annabelle, you got to help me out. 279 00:10:46,039 --> 00:10:47,473 Mr. Miller, in 30 minutes, 280 00:10:47,540 --> 00:10:49,174 I'll have a barstool and a high chair. 281 00:10:49,242 --> 00:10:51,176 I might be able to get you a table, but I can't guarantee 282 00:10:51,244 --> 00:10:52,645 that your mariachi band is gonna hang around. 283 00:10:52,712 --> 00:10:53,812 I'm so sorry. Can you please hold? 284 00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:55,014 Come on, Miller. 285 00:10:55,081 --> 00:10:56,615 Bob, I don't have time for this. 286 00:10:56,683 --> 00:10:58,350 - Clock's ticking, bub! - I know. 287 00:10:58,418 --> 00:11:02,008 But the hostess just offered me a barstool and a high chair, 288 00:11:02,071 --> 00:11:03,555 - and I think I have to take it. - Wait, wait, wait, wait. 289 00:11:03,623 --> 00:11:05,891 Let me talk to her. Merge me. Merge me. 290 00:11:05,959 --> 00:11:09,128 You asked for it. Here's Annabelle. 291 00:11:09,195 --> 00:11:10,529 Nobody say a word. 292 00:11:10,597 --> 00:11:13,165 Hey. I'm not doing anything. 293 00:11:13,233 --> 00:11:15,768 - What are you doing? - I have to get this out of my system. 294 00:11:15,835 --> 00:11:18,170 Mmm! You want to cuddle with Mommy? 295 00:11:18,238 --> 00:11:21,473 You want to cuddle with Mommy? 296 00:11:21,541 --> 00:11:22,641 What's your name? 297 00:11:22,709 --> 00:11:24,643 Oh, widdle baby tired. 298 00:11:24,711 --> 00:11:27,246 He-wo. He-wo. What's your name? 299 00:11:27,313 --> 00:11:28,681 Is it Mario? 300 00:11:28,748 --> 00:11:31,417 Yes, it is. Yes, it is! 301 00:11:31,484 --> 00:11:33,519 Okay. Okay. I got that out of my system. 302 00:11:33,586 --> 00:11:35,254 Now we have to go sign some paperwork. 303 00:11:35,321 --> 00:11:37,189 Paperwork for a dog? What, are we buying or leasing? 304 00:11:37,257 --> 00:11:39,692 - Just get there fast, okay? - We can do fast. I like this. 305 00:11:39,759 --> 00:11:41,860 We got this. 306 00:11:43,496 --> 00:11:45,564 Fast, fast, fast. 307 00:11:45,632 --> 00:11:47,499 You guys still on the phone? 308 00:11:47,567 --> 00:11:49,001 Mr. Miller, I did not realize 309 00:11:49,069 --> 00:11:50,869 you were taking care of a sick relative. 310 00:11:50,937 --> 00:11:52,871 If you can get here in the next 30 minutes, 311 00:11:52,939 --> 00:11:54,573 I can squeeze you in to a normal table. 312 00:11:54,641 --> 00:11:55,941 Thank you. 30 minutes. Thank you. 313 00:11:56,009 --> 00:11:58,243 Nick, go! Hey, Annabelle. 314 00:11:58,311 --> 00:12:00,879 Tell me, uh... you do a nice rib eye? 315 00:12:00,947 --> 00:12:02,915 Oh, no. Between me and you, it's trash. 316 00:12:02,982 --> 00:12:04,349 That's enough. 317 00:12:04,417 --> 00:12:06,785 Cannot drink it, so I'm gonna pour it. 318 00:12:06,853 --> 00:12:08,952 Hey, Schmidt. It's getting a little late. 319 00:12:09,014 --> 00:12:11,423 Maybe we should, you know, move along to that second location. 320 00:12:11,491 --> 00:12:13,158 Cecilia... 321 00:12:13,226 --> 00:12:15,327 I have something I need to say to you. 322 00:12:15,395 --> 00:12:16,929 Okay. 323 00:12:18,631 --> 00:12:20,966 Um... first, let me say 324 00:12:21,034 --> 00:12:23,635 what an amazing mother and woman 325 00:12:23,703 --> 00:12:25,971 and partner you are. 326 00:12:26,039 --> 00:12:27,506 And deep down, I truly do... 327 00:12:27,574 --> 00:12:30,409 I truly do believe that you are a good person. 328 00:12:30,477 --> 00:12:33,088 A good person who likes Jews. 329 00:12:33,151 --> 00:12:36,715 - You like Jews just fine. - Schmidt? 330 00:12:36,783 --> 00:12:38,884 I'm nervous about us getting pregnant again. 331 00:12:38,952 --> 00:12:40,786 You are? 332 00:12:40,854 --> 00:12:42,121 Why? 333 00:12:42,191 --> 00:12:44,793 Because your temperament while pregnant 334 00:12:44,855 --> 00:12:46,941 is, um... 335 00:12:48,511 --> 00:12:49,962 Wish I had the words. 336 00:12:50,029 --> 00:12:51,296 - Winnie. - Hmm? 337 00:12:51,364 --> 00:12:53,932 - He have the words for you? - The words he used were 338 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,325 - "constant terror." - Why would you repeat that? 339 00:12:56,404 --> 00:12:57,536 Well, 'cause you know I'm scared of Cece. 340 00:12:57,604 --> 00:12:59,404 Well, I'm sorry. 341 00:12:59,472 --> 00:13:01,440 I'm sorry if I was a little bit moody 342 00:13:01,508 --> 00:13:04,042 while I was creating life with my body. 343 00:13:04,110 --> 00:13:06,044 Aly, can you believe this? 344 00:13:06,112 --> 00:13:08,480 - Well... - Well? 345 00:13:08,548 --> 00:13:11,950 Okay, d-don't be mad, but I have never, ever seen 346 00:13:12,018 --> 00:13:14,620 anyone be pregnant the way that you were pregnant. 347 00:13:14,687 --> 00:13:16,188 So much so that, for evidence, 348 00:13:16,256 --> 00:13:18,390 I decided to capture it on my phone. 349 00:13:18,458 --> 00:13:20,259 What genius got us a Jolly Jumper? 350 00:13:20,326 --> 00:13:23,662 Who got us the Jol... Okay, Vandana Auntie, way to go. 351 00:13:23,730 --> 00:13:26,131 You see, we already have a Jolly Jumper. 352 00:13:26,199 --> 00:13:28,667 So put the tuna salad down. Put it down! 353 00:13:28,735 --> 00:13:30,369 Tuna salad 354 00:13:30,436 --> 00:13:33,605 is for people who use the registry. 355 00:13:33,673 --> 00:13:36,508 Boo! Everybody boo. 356 00:13:36,576 --> 00:13:37,643 - Why are you not booing?! - I honestly don't 357 00:13:37,710 --> 00:13:40,105 - remember that. - Oh, it's okay, Cecilia. 358 00:13:40,198 --> 00:13:42,681 Also, thanks for having my back, Aly. 359 00:13:42,749 --> 00:13:44,983 Whoa. I do not have your back. 360 00:13:45,051 --> 00:13:46,985 Yeah, I've also never seen someone pregnant 361 00:13:47,053 --> 00:13:48,387 the way you were pregnant. 362 00:13:48,454 --> 00:13:51,023 You were a coddling, blubbering mess. 363 00:13:51,090 --> 00:13:53,826 Aly, come closer, I want you to capture the luminescence 364 00:13:53,893 --> 00:13:56,028 - of Cece's hair. - Shut up and keep brushing. 365 00:13:56,095 --> 00:13:57,696 You are a lifemaker. 366 00:13:57,764 --> 00:14:00,332 You have the jewel of life inside of you. 367 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:03,035 Cece, what do you need? I'll get you anything you need. 368 00:14:03,102 --> 00:14:04,736 You'll never have to move again. 369 00:14:04,804 --> 00:14:06,572 That was hard for me to watch. 370 00:14:06,639 --> 00:14:09,842 - Uh, I was unbearable. - Yeah, we both were. 371 00:14:09,909 --> 00:14:12,010 Hate to see if you had any videos of me 372 00:14:12,078 --> 00:14:13,579 - in that phone, which you don't... - I do. 373 00:14:13,646 --> 00:14:16,339 Mountie costume! 374 00:14:17,250 --> 00:14:18,584 Since this is a fourth-floor loft, 375 00:14:18,651 --> 00:14:21,053 will you be creating a fire plan with Mario? 376 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:23,388 We'd love his input. 377 00:14:23,456 --> 00:14:26,091 She means yes. Man, you got a lot of questions, Judith. 378 00:14:26,159 --> 00:14:28,026 And if you were on a walk with Mario 379 00:14:28,094 --> 00:14:29,895 and you encountered a coyote, what would you do? 380 00:14:29,963 --> 00:14:31,930 I'd run away. 381 00:14:31,998 --> 00:14:34,499 - He's joking. - No. I mean, what I would do is 382 00:14:34,567 --> 00:14:36,535 I'd pick up Mario, and then I'd run away. 383 00:14:36,603 --> 00:14:39,905 And who would take Mario if your relationship were to end? 384 00:14:39,973 --> 00:14:41,573 Oh, thank God. That's an easy one. I would take him. 385 00:14:41,641 --> 00:14:43,942 - If we break up, I'd take him. - What?! 386 00:14:44,010 --> 00:14:46,979 - You think we're gonna break up? - I didn't say... No, no, no, no. 387 00:14:47,046 --> 00:14:48,914 You know what? I actually... I missed a question. 388 00:14:48,982 --> 00:14:51,149 How do you feel about pee pads? 389 00:14:53,198 --> 00:14:54,761 So in your vision of the future, 390 00:14:54,839 --> 00:14:56,840 we break up, you get to take Mario, 391 00:14:56,908 --> 00:14:58,742 and I'm left alone with some poop bags? 392 00:14:58,810 --> 00:15:00,110 - What are poop bags? - They're the bags 393 00:15:00,178 --> 00:15:01,512 that you put the dog's poop in. 394 00:15:01,579 --> 00:15:04,314 Why would you put dog poo in bags, Jess? 395 00:15:04,382 --> 00:15:06,049 It was a hypothetical question. 396 00:15:06,117 --> 00:15:08,018 But you answered it so quickly. 397 00:15:08,086 --> 00:15:09,887 Because I thought we were trying to rush Judith. 398 00:15:09,954 --> 00:15:11,789 We were. I just didn't think you'd be able 399 00:15:11,856 --> 00:15:13,390 to answer that question so easily. 400 00:15:13,458 --> 00:15:15,259 I mean, do you see us breaking up? 401 00:15:15,326 --> 00:15:17,294 No, I don't want to break up ever. I just... 402 00:15:17,362 --> 00:15:19,096 - Hold on. Sorry. - Who is that? 403 00:15:19,164 --> 00:15:21,031 It's just the restaurant we're having dinner tonight, okay? 404 00:15:21,099 --> 00:15:23,133 - It's no big deal. - Look, I know this might not be 405 00:15:23,201 --> 00:15:24,568 the most convenient time to talk about this, 406 00:15:24,636 --> 00:15:26,782 but we're about to become parents to a dog, 407 00:15:26,860 --> 00:15:28,472 and I need to know we're on the same page. 408 00:15:28,540 --> 00:15:30,063 We are on the same page. I'm really sorry. 409 00:15:30,118 --> 00:15:32,024 - I have to answer this one. - You need to take a phone call 410 00:15:32,086 --> 00:15:34,244 when I'm telling you how I feel about our relationship? 411 00:15:34,312 --> 00:15:36,113 You know what? Let me take that phone call. 412 00:15:36,181 --> 00:15:38,849 Hello? Annabelle from Beso. 413 00:15:38,917 --> 00:15:41,118 Well, we're not coming. Okay. Bye. 414 00:15:41,186 --> 00:15:43,654 Where were we? 415 00:15:43,721 --> 00:15:45,189 - You know what's crazy? - Mm. 416 00:15:45,256 --> 00:15:46,623 Even after seeing all those videos, 417 00:15:46,691 --> 00:15:48,725 I still want to have another baby with you 418 00:15:48,793 --> 00:15:51,128 more than anything else in the whole wide world. 419 00:15:51,196 --> 00:15:53,797 Me, too, more than anything. 420 00:15:59,197 --> 00:16:01,111 Things are gonna be so different this time. 421 00:16:01,158 --> 00:16:02,191 I'm gonna give you so much space. 422 00:16:02,273 --> 00:16:04,346 I'm gonna be so pro-Semitic, that little beanie you wear 423 00:16:04,393 --> 00:16:05,552 on the top of your head is gonna spin. 424 00:16:05,577 --> 00:16:07,845 Feels like a rough start, but I appreciate the effort. 425 00:16:07,912 --> 00:16:09,680 - Let's go to the hotel. - We're never gonna 426 00:16:09,747 --> 00:16:11,648 make it there and back in time to relieve the babysitter. 427 00:16:11,716 --> 00:16:14,651 You know what? I know someplace on the way. 428 00:16:14,719 --> 00:16:17,354 There's no way that they're home. 429 00:16:17,422 --> 00:16:19,957 Nick is keeping those dinner reservations, I guarantee it. 430 00:16:20,024 --> 00:16:22,459 I didn't know when and I didn't know why, but I knew 431 00:16:22,527 --> 00:16:24,761 that one day I'd be having sex in this loft again. 432 00:16:24,829 --> 00:16:27,798 I hope Winston's room still has that exercise bike in it. 433 00:16:27,866 --> 00:16:30,100 - I have an idea. - Mm. 434 00:16:34,572 --> 00:16:36,340 You wouldn't think 435 00:16:36,407 --> 00:16:38,942 that woman would have a urinal in her bathroom. 436 00:16:39,010 --> 00:16:40,611 No, I can't go out looking like this. 437 00:16:40,678 --> 00:16:42,212 - I can't stay in looking like this. - Uh... 438 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:44,381 What?! No! 439 00:16:44,449 --> 00:16:45,883 You seeing this?! 440 00:16:45,950 --> 00:16:48,218 I ain't got no sense of fashion. You weren't gonna tell me? 441 00:16:48,286 --> 00:16:50,383 - I did, many times. - Then why didn't you leave me?! 442 00:16:50,453 --> 00:16:52,990 I did, when you bought those banana-yellow bird pants, 443 00:16:53,057 --> 00:16:55,158 but I came back because I love you 444 00:16:55,226 --> 00:16:57,728 just a little more than I hate those pants. 445 00:17:00,798 --> 00:17:02,099 Why-why are you taking them off? 446 00:17:02,166 --> 00:17:04,635 I just missed seeing your face with my own eyes. 447 00:17:04,702 --> 00:17:06,069 Look, I know there's a lot 448 00:17:06,137 --> 00:17:08,071 of beautiful things that I have not seen, 449 00:17:08,139 --> 00:17:10,707 but nothing in this world 450 00:17:10,775 --> 00:17:13,475 will make me take my eyes off of you. 451 00:17:13,530 --> 00:17:17,100 Why are you so... sweet to me? 452 00:17:17,170 --> 00:17:18,215 Mm. 453 00:17:18,283 --> 00:17:21,018 But we only have these for a few more hours, and I want you 454 00:17:21,085 --> 00:17:23,654 to see as much as you can, babe. All right, what's next? 455 00:17:23,721 --> 00:17:25,589 I want to see some classic movies in color: 456 00:17:25,657 --> 00:17:27,558 Citizen Kane, Schindler's List... 457 00:17:27,625 --> 00:17:30,093 Ooh, I got bad news for you. 458 00:17:30,161 --> 00:17:32,429 This is a surprise. 459 00:17:32,497 --> 00:17:35,098 A real slobber goblin tonight, huh? 460 00:17:35,166 --> 00:17:37,234 What are you talking about? 461 00:17:37,302 --> 00:17:39,703 - Cece? - What? 462 00:17:39,771 --> 00:17:41,204 We are not alone in this bed. 463 00:17:43,508 --> 00:17:45,776 Aah! Whoa! Aah! Wait! 464 00:17:45,843 --> 00:17:47,277 No! 465 00:17:47,345 --> 00:17:49,279 No, no. Dog! 466 00:17:49,347 --> 00:17:51,281 - No! - Dog! Horny dog! 467 00:17:51,349 --> 00:17:53,784 That terrier attacked my sensitive area! 468 00:17:53,851 --> 00:17:56,053 Okay, how do you think I feel? You confused me for a dog. 469 00:17:56,120 --> 00:17:57,688 I've never seen a naked man before. 470 00:17:57,755 --> 00:17:59,423 Oh, what are you guys doing here? 471 00:17:59,490 --> 00:18:01,258 - Who are these people? - We're trying for another baby. 472 00:18:01,326 --> 00:18:04,628 Oh, my God. Congratulations! We're adopting a dog! 473 00:18:04,696 --> 00:18:07,130 No, you're not. I've had enough. I'm taking Mario. 474 00:18:07,198 --> 00:18:09,766 Wait! Don't take that dog. 475 00:18:09,834 --> 00:18:12,970 Jess deserves Mario. This woman is amazing. 476 00:18:13,037 --> 00:18:14,671 She's gonna love that dog so much 477 00:18:14,739 --> 00:18:17,207 that she's gonna pick up its poop and keep it in bags. 478 00:18:17,275 --> 00:18:19,876 Oh, wait! Mario! 479 00:18:22,232 --> 00:18:24,147 Mario?! 480 00:18:24,288 --> 00:18:26,189 Where are you?! 481 00:18:26,351 --> 00:18:28,309 Mario?! 482 00:18:28,739 --> 00:18:30,606 There he is! 483 00:18:30,642 --> 00:18:32,009 - Mario! - Mario! 484 00:18:32,085 --> 00:18:33,686 Mario! 485 00:18:35,294 --> 00:18:36,528 Is that Nick and Jess? 486 00:18:36,595 --> 00:18:38,396 - Mario! - Mario! 487 00:18:38,464 --> 00:18:41,099 Mario? Mario? 488 00:18:41,167 --> 00:18:42,100 Mario? 489 00:18:44,904 --> 00:18:45,837 I got eyes on him! 490 00:18:48,741 --> 00:18:50,442 Okay. 491 00:18:50,509 --> 00:18:53,645 Oh, my God. You got him. 492 00:18:53,712 --> 00:18:56,147 That was heroic. 493 00:18:56,215 --> 00:18:57,615 I mean, it was so stupid, 494 00:18:57,683 --> 00:19:00,351 but it really... it was heroic. 495 00:19:00,419 --> 00:19:02,587 - Yeah. - Mario. 496 00:19:02,655 --> 00:19:06,402 I am so mad at you, but I love you. 497 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:08,168 I mean, first you're running away from us, 498 00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:09,327 now you're happy to see us. 499 00:19:09,395 --> 00:19:11,963 You are all over the map, Mario Day-Miller. 500 00:19:12,031 --> 00:19:14,132 I got to grab that. 501 00:19:15,434 --> 00:19:17,135 Is that my dad? 502 00:19:17,203 --> 00:19:18,770 Yes, yeah, your dad... He, uh... 503 00:19:18,838 --> 00:19:22,265 he calls me every time he... he meets somebody from Chicago. 504 00:19:22,351 --> 00:19:23,508 I mean, he'll ask me, he'll go, 505 00:19:23,576 --> 00:19:25,443 "Do you know Tim from Chicago? 'Cause he doesn't know you." 506 00:19:25,511 --> 00:19:28,646 And then I just say "No," and then, yeah. 507 00:19:28,714 --> 00:19:31,449 That doesn't make any sense. My dad doesn't even like you. 508 00:19:31,517 --> 00:19:33,022 Well, that's what happens... 509 00:19:33,084 --> 00:19:34,694 - Whatever. Who cares? - Wait. 510 00:19:35,912 --> 00:19:38,114 Beso's where we went on our first date. 511 00:19:38,190 --> 00:19:41,526 Did we? I'm restaurant blind. I don't remember restaurants. 512 00:19:41,594 --> 00:19:43,828 Okay, now, we got to get Mario back home 513 00:19:43,896 --> 00:19:45,497 before Judith remembers she wants to take him back. 514 00:19:45,564 --> 00:19:47,432 Let's go! Let's go! 515 00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:49,567 Wait. Sweat back! 516 00:19:50,903 --> 00:19:53,671 Nick, you're lying to me. 517 00:19:53,739 --> 00:19:55,540 Oh, my God. 518 00:19:55,608 --> 00:19:59,244 Nick, this dinner... 519 00:19:59,311 --> 00:20:01,412 were you gonna...? 520 00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:05,383 Jess, I had been planning this for so long. 521 00:20:06,886 --> 00:20:09,721 I just wanted everything to be perfect. 522 00:20:09,788 --> 00:20:11,723 But it is perfect. I mean, it's us, 523 00:20:11,790 --> 00:20:14,325 so this is as perfect as it gets. 524 00:20:17,163 --> 00:20:18,763 Okay. 525 00:20:20,499 --> 00:20:22,333 Is he about to...? 526 00:20:22,401 --> 00:20:24,102 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God! 527 00:20:24,170 --> 00:20:25,637 All right. 528 00:20:27,973 --> 00:20:30,675 He's been keeping the engagement ring in a plastic bag. 529 00:20:30,743 --> 00:20:34,445 It's not even a Ziploc bag. It's just a generic plastic bag. 530 00:20:37,249 --> 00:20:38,850 Jessica Day... 531 00:20:40,152 --> 00:20:42,754 ...will you marry me? 532 00:20:42,821 --> 00:20:46,624 Nick, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. 533 00:20:46,692 --> 00:20:49,807 I want to raise this dog with you, 534 00:20:49,885 --> 00:20:53,010 and I want to have babies and eat good food and laugh 535 00:20:53,103 --> 00:20:54,799 and take care of each other. 536 00:20:54,867 --> 00:20:57,135 And I want it to start tonight. 537 00:20:57,203 --> 00:20:59,270 It's you and me. It's... 538 00:20:59,338 --> 00:21:00,972 It's always been you and me. 539 00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:02,907 - Is that a "yes"? - Yes! 540 00:21:02,975 --> 00:21:04,668 Yes! She said yes! 541 00:21:04,754 --> 00:21:09,647 ♪ I've had the time of my life ♪ 542 00:21:09,715 --> 00:21:13,318 ♪ No, I never felt this way before... ♪ 543 00:21:13,385 --> 00:21:14,819 Oh, USC's never getting these glasses back. 544 00:21:14,887 --> 00:21:16,788 They can take my bone marrow. 545 00:21:19,220 --> 00:21:21,492 Okay, so who gets the dog if you get a divorce? 546 00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:23,528 Shut up, Judith! 547 00:21:23,596 --> 00:21:25,964 - Dad, I said yes! - I did it, Bob. 548 00:21:26,031 --> 00:21:29,601 Oh, I don't know why you spent so much of the story 549 00:21:29,668 --> 00:21:32,170 talking about that color-blind friend of yours, 550 00:21:32,238 --> 00:21:35,073 but I'm so happy! 551 00:21:35,140 --> 00:21:37,609 Dad, can you lean away? You're blowing out the speaker. 552 00:21:37,676 --> 00:21:39,310 Dad, are you okay? 553 00:21:39,378 --> 00:21:42,847 His reaction doesn't bode well for the speech at the wedding. 554 00:21:42,872 --> 00:21:43,804 What do you mean? 555 00:21:43,850 --> 00:21:45,483 - Cheers. - Cheers. 556 00:21:45,484 --> 00:21:47,986 Cheers to you, too. 557 00:21:48,053 --> 00:21:50,688 Oh. 558 00:21:53,759 --> 00:21:57,959 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com