1
00:00:06,789 --> 00:00:08,790
The easiest way to win a game
2
00:00:08,791 --> 00:00:10,334
is to make your opponent
3
00:00:10,335 --> 00:00:13,295
think they're playing
a different game entirely.
4
00:00:13,296 --> 00:00:16,005
The only crime I'm guilty of
is being an embarrassing nepo baby
5
00:00:16,006 --> 00:00:18,842
- who's trying to do some good.
- Yeah, how's that going?
6
00:00:18,843 --> 00:00:22,095
I wanna prove to everyone
that I'm not a... fuck-up.
7
00:00:22,096 --> 00:00:24,598
Jay didn't do it.
He's sweeter than I expected.
8
00:00:24,599 --> 00:00:27,351
That lying piece of shit.
This isn't his finger.
9
00:00:27,352 --> 00:00:28,852
Enjoy the remodel.
10
00:00:28,853 --> 00:00:30,854
She's a home decor witch!
11
00:00:30,855 --> 00:00:32,396
What's Mayor Tillman doing here?
12
00:00:32,397 --> 00:00:33,982
How is the pod? Right?
13
00:00:33,983 --> 00:00:36,693
I'm... Hey, I'm still
avail to guest, FYI.
14
00:00:36,694 --> 00:00:38,946
I'm collecting signatures
to stop New York City
15
00:00:38,947 --> 00:00:40,948
from opening its first ever casino.
16
00:00:40,949 --> 00:00:42,574
I got an offer on my place.
17
00:00:42,575 --> 00:00:43,909
It's big.
18
00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:46,995
I, uh, joined a dating service
for sexy seniors.
19
00:00:46,996 --> 00:00:48,497
It's called, uh, Last Gasp.
20
00:00:48,498 --> 00:00:51,416
Oh! Last Gasp notification.
21
00:00:51,417 --> 00:00:54,044
- Priscilla, she's so funny.
- You told her about the case?
22
00:00:54,045 --> 00:00:55,963
Just a... a little tidbit.
23
00:00:55,964 --> 00:00:57,339
You're being catfished, Charles.
24
00:00:57,340 --> 00:01:00,342
This glitch is from the same footage
as THĒ and Seth Rogen's.
25
00:01:00,343 --> 00:01:03,720
- Something has been cut out.
- Why is the Last Gasp peach logo
26
00:01:03,721 --> 00:01:06,014
the same as on the security footage?
27
00:01:06,015 --> 00:01:08,559
That's who's been messaging me?
28
00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:11,562
- And cooked the footage.
- And maybe killed Lester.
29
00:01:11,563 --> 00:01:13,689
What does it say?
30
00:01:13,690 --> 00:01:16,400
You're such a smarty-pants.
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00:01:16,401 --> 00:01:18,903
Now I need to come hunt you down.
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00:01:23,324 --> 00:01:25,826
When you live as a titan of industry
33
00:01:25,827 --> 00:01:28,788
on this planet amid the metropoleis...
34
00:01:31,332 --> 00:01:34,793
nothing means more than getting away.
35
00:01:36,796 --> 00:01:41,300
To think, to play, or just... escape.
36
00:01:42,552 --> 00:01:44,804
You think he knows
he's goin' to the vet?
37
00:01:45,805 --> 00:01:47,889
Well, if he didn't, he does now.
38
00:01:47,890 --> 00:01:49,683
Oh.
39
00:01:49,684 --> 00:01:53,478
Ooh, it's one of those "Silver Alerts."
Always so sad
40
00:01:53,479 --> 00:01:55,188
- when an old person goes missing.
- Aw.
41
00:01:55,189 --> 00:01:59,901
It says, "Endangered adult male,
74, 5'7", brunette,
42
00:01:59,902 --> 00:02:02,613
"last seen wearing
southwestern cowboy boots
43
00:02:02,614 --> 00:02:04,448
- and a purple scarf."
- Oh! Thank God!
44
00:02:04,449 --> 00:02:06,867
Did it say the boots were turquoise?
45
00:02:06,868 --> 00:02:08,619
Oh, thank God!
46
00:02:08,620 --> 00:02:09,870
Thank God.
47
00:02:09,871 --> 00:02:11,747
You gotta save me.
48
00:02:11,748 --> 00:02:14,125
I'm in danger.
49
00:02:14,959 --> 00:02:16,668
You hear it all the time.
50
00:02:16,669 --> 00:02:19,463
"The bigger the risk,
the bigger the reward."
51
00:02:19,464 --> 00:02:21,172
But when it comes down to it, most
52
00:02:21,184 --> 00:02:23,258
people aren't willing
to take the leap.
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00:02:23,259 --> 00:02:25,552
What the very successful know
54
00:02:25,553 --> 00:02:29,348
is that you have to take bold risks
to strike gold.
55
00:02:29,349 --> 00:02:34,102
So, tell me, are you willing
to go all in for greatness?
56
00:02:34,103 --> 00:02:36,689
- I said, are you willing?
- Yes!
57
00:02:37,774 --> 00:02:40,817
Sorry.
I know he is our murder suspect.
58
00:02:40,818 --> 00:02:44,029
But the "Bash Steed Greatness Academy"
audio tapes
59
00:02:44,030 --> 00:02:46,073
are really inspiring.
60
00:02:46,074 --> 00:02:47,949
That was $18 well spent.
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00:02:47,950 --> 00:02:52,454
If only he let it slip where
to find him, then I'd be all in.
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00:02:52,455 --> 00:02:54,331
Oh, wait a minute,
this might be something.
63
00:02:54,332 --> 00:02:55,415
- What?
- Oh. No.
64
00:02:55,416 --> 00:02:59,795
His company website says,
"Bash Steed is a citizen of the universe
65
00:02:59,796 --> 00:03:02,130
"with a home in each of the continents
66
00:03:02,131 --> 00:03:05,133
- and a bio module on Mars."
- Wow. Wow.
67
00:03:05,134 --> 00:03:08,053
He's also an asshole, pardon my French.
68
00:03:08,054 --> 00:03:09,930
I mean, he did pretend
to be my girlfriend.
69
00:03:09,931 --> 00:03:12,599
Mm, not exactly sure you can call
Priscilla a girlfriend
70
00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,602
when you messaged for six hours
and you've never met in person.
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00:03:15,603 --> 00:03:17,771
Oh, how embarrassing.
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00:03:17,772 --> 00:03:21,024
Someone doesn't know
the term "situationship."
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00:03:21,025 --> 00:03:24,277
Okay, will you two Muppets
stop arguing?
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00:03:24,278 --> 00:03:27,280
We need to prepare
for our interview with the mayor.
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00:03:27,281 --> 00:03:28,824
Fine. I'm over it anyway.
76
00:03:28,825 --> 00:03:30,409
Although I still don't know
why we're podcasting
77
00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:32,744
if we're not allowed
to talk about our suspects.
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00:03:32,745 --> 00:03:36,039
That's because
we are contractually obligated
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00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:38,459
to make content for Wondify.
80
00:03:39,460 --> 00:03:42,546
- This is so dumb.
- No, no, no, um, I think interviews
81
00:03:42,547 --> 00:03:44,798
are an evolution of our brand.
82
00:03:44,799 --> 00:03:47,968
And having the mayor
as our first guest is quite the get.
83
00:03:47,969 --> 00:03:49,970
I've already reached out
to Meghan Markle's team
84
00:03:49,971 --> 00:03:51,597
about being guest number two.
85
00:03:52,598 --> 00:03:54,725
Okay, that must be him... Oh!
86
00:03:54,726 --> 00:03:56,393
Did you see the email from Wondify?
87
00:03:56,394 --> 00:03:58,603
They want us to be
more like the Drunken Sluts.
88
00:03:58,604 --> 00:04:01,565
You know, so they want us to slut it up!
89
00:04:01,566 --> 00:04:04,192
Ho-ho! Ho!
90
00:04:04,193 --> 00:04:05,278
Jesus.
91
00:04:06,362 --> 00:04:09,781
- Greetings. Ho-ho!
- Hey!
92
00:04:09,782 --> 00:04:11,616
Mayor Tillman in the house.
93
00:04:11,617 --> 00:04:13,160
How are you, Charles?
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00:04:13,161 --> 00:04:15,787
Oh, my goodness.
95
00:04:15,788 --> 00:04:17,956
- Hello. What a pleasure.
- Hello, how are you?
96
00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:19,875
- Thank you. Thank you.
- A pleasure. Big fan.
97
00:04:19,876 --> 00:04:24,171
Thank you.
Oh, I can't believe I'm here, finally.
98
00:04:24,172 --> 00:04:27,174
Wasn't sure how many overtures
I was gonna have to make
99
00:04:27,175 --> 00:04:30,427
before you would finally take the hint
and let me on the pod.
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00:04:30,428 --> 00:04:31,678
Oh, no, no.
101
00:04:31,679 --> 00:04:32,929
But fear not, fear not.
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00:04:32,930 --> 00:04:36,224
I have been working
on my podcast voice for months.
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00:04:36,225 --> 00:04:37,560
Check it out.
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00:04:38,478 --> 00:04:40,145
I am Michael Barbaro.
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00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:41,563
Uh-huh?
106
00:04:41,564 --> 00:04:42,689
Oh, no, that's it.
107
00:04:42,690 --> 00:04:44,024
- Oh!
- Oh.
108
00:04:44,025 --> 00:04:47,235
- That was so good.
- Oh, well, let's just get this started.
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00:04:47,236 --> 00:04:48,320
Alright.
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00:04:49,572 --> 00:04:50,739
Okay!
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00:04:50,740 --> 00:04:53,617
Oliver and Mabel,
we got a really special edition
112
00:04:53,618 --> 00:04:55,619
of Only Murders podcast today.
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00:04:55,620 --> 00:04:58,330
We're sitting with
New York City Mayor Beau Tillman!
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00:04:59,791 --> 00:05:00,957
- Whoo!
- Thank you.
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00:05:00,958 --> 00:05:03,376
Thank you very much, Charles.
Uh, a huge fan.
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00:05:03,377 --> 00:05:04,753
- Ohh!
- Yeah.
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00:05:04,754 --> 00:05:06,922
Uh, you know,
a big part of my platform
118
00:05:06,923 --> 00:05:09,549
is making the streets
of this city safer,
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00:05:09,550 --> 00:05:12,052
so I am excited to chop it up today.
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00:05:12,053 --> 00:05:15,472
Well, uh, great. So the first
and most obvious, uh, question is...
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00:05:15,473 --> 00:05:17,057
- Mm-hmm?
- ...what are you gonna do about
122
00:05:17,058 --> 00:05:19,518
the crosswalk button
on 86th and Broadway?
123
00:05:19,519 --> 00:05:22,187
Oh, uh, is... is it broken?
124
00:05:22,188 --> 00:05:24,314
No, but the button gets a little sticky,
125
00:05:24,315 --> 00:05:26,483
and sometimes it... it's...
it's difficult to tell
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00:05:26,484 --> 00:05:28,194
if you've pushed it or not.
127
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:32,531
You said you wanted to make
the streets safer.
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00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:34,241
Oh, I meant from murder.
129
00:05:34,242 --> 00:05:36,076
- Ha! Of course.
- Yeah, so... yeah.
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00:05:36,077 --> 00:05:39,538
'Cause I... I heard your teaser trailer
a while back, then crickets.
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00:05:39,539 --> 00:05:41,540
So, I have some theories.
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00:05:41,541 --> 00:05:43,834
Have we looked into the person
133
00:05:43,835 --> 00:05:46,962
who is running against me this fall?
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00:05:46,963 --> 00:05:48,755
Right?
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00:05:48,756 --> 00:05:50,757
- You guys see?
- Oh! It's a joke.
136
00:05:51,843 --> 00:05:53,301
- Joking.
- No. No, no, no, no.
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00:05:53,302 --> 00:05:55,804
We cannot podcast about that murder.
138
00:05:55,805 --> 00:05:59,140
- What...?
- Because, well, our prime suspects
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00:05:59,141 --> 00:06:02,727
bought our network and banned us
from talking about them.
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00:06:02,728 --> 00:06:06,022
Oh, the Wondify sale. Yeah.
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00:06:06,023 --> 00:06:07,858
Wait.
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00:06:07,859 --> 00:06:10,777
Is Bash Steed one of your suspects?
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00:06:10,778 --> 00:06:12,487
Yeah, you know him?
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00:06:12,488 --> 00:06:15,115
Uh, love him.
I... I... I would be shocked
145
00:06:15,116 --> 00:06:17,117
if he was related to your case.
146
00:06:17,118 --> 00:06:20,954
Actually, um, you know, Romy,
I... I could really use a coffee
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00:06:20,955 --> 00:06:23,249
- from that bodega on 74th.
- Okay.
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00:06:26,460 --> 00:06:27,627
Okay, thank you.
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00:06:29,255 --> 00:06:31,632
Bash Steed is your murderer.
150
00:07:20,556 --> 00:07:22,057
We have to be quick.
151
00:07:24,769 --> 00:07:26,812
Romy is Bash's niece.
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00:07:27,605 --> 00:07:30,815
He had me hire her so he could
keep eyes on me all the time.
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00:07:30,816 --> 00:07:33,360
And yes, she also happens
to be the best assistant I've ever had.
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00:07:33,361 --> 00:07:35,695
You should see how fast
she gets coffee.
155
00:07:35,696 --> 00:07:37,155
Like a Road Runner cartoon.
156
00:07:38,407 --> 00:07:39,951
She's already in the courtyard.
157
00:07:41,452 --> 00:07:42,859
Well, then, uh, start talking. What
158
00:07:42,871 --> 00:07:44,412
makes you think Bash is our suspect?
159
00:07:44,413 --> 00:07:45,956
Well, I... I don't actually
know that for sure.
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00:07:45,957 --> 00:07:47,040
Dammit, Mayor!
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00:07:47,041 --> 00:07:48,875
But if you are investigating him
for something,
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00:07:48,876 --> 00:07:51,503
chances are, he did that something.
Trust me.
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00:07:51,504 --> 00:07:53,964
This man will do
whatever it takes to get ahead.
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00:07:53,965 --> 00:07:56,549
He has paid millions into my campaign.
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00:07:56,550 --> 00:07:59,010
So, why are you trying to out him?
166
00:07:59,011 --> 00:08:00,637
When I was first running for office,
167
00:08:00,638 --> 00:08:02,555
I was up against people
with deep pockets.
168
00:08:02,556 --> 00:08:06,101
I didn't stand a chance,
until Bash opened up his checkbook.
169
00:08:06,102 --> 00:08:09,437
But it turns out, if people
give you money, you owe them later.
170
00:08:09,438 --> 00:08:11,564
Been there.
One time, I took a small loan
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00:08:11,565 --> 00:08:13,483
- from Robert Blake. He was...
- Oliver!
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00:08:13,484 --> 00:08:15,110
Uh, s... Real quick.
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00:08:15,111 --> 00:08:18,238
He made me lie under oath.
Continue, please.
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00:08:18,239 --> 00:08:20,949
Uh, okay.
Well, uh, it started out small.
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00:08:20,950 --> 00:08:24,077
Uh, building permits,
diplomatic license plates.
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00:08:24,078 --> 00:08:25,787
But then the asks kept getting bigger.
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00:08:25,788 --> 00:08:28,665
Now, I'm spending so much time
doing his bidding,
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00:08:28,666 --> 00:08:31,584
I haven't made good
on any of my campaign promises.
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00:08:31,585 --> 00:08:33,586
That's why I wanted to do your podcast,
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00:08:33,587 --> 00:08:35,880
so I could win over the public
and stop simping
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00:08:35,881 --> 00:08:37,966
for some lunatic billionaire.
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00:08:37,967 --> 00:08:41,344
Why don't you do something about it?
Talk to the chief of police.
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00:08:41,345 --> 00:08:44,514
Who do you think
is the NYPD's biggest donor?
184
00:08:44,515 --> 00:08:46,517
He's literally above the law.
185
00:08:47,143 --> 00:08:48,977
I'll bet Bash hired those dirty cops
186
00:08:48,978 --> 00:08:51,187
I saw over Nicky's body
at the dry cleaners.
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00:08:51,188 --> 00:08:53,314
Don't doubt it. And meanwhile...
188
00:08:53,315 --> 00:08:55,150
I'm powerless.
189
00:08:55,151 --> 00:08:56,776
Nothing but a puppet.
190
00:08:56,777 --> 00:08:59,112
My ass is sore from having
his hand so far up there.
191
00:08:59,113 --> 00:09:00,655
And not in a fun way.
192
00:09:00,656 --> 00:09:03,366
Great, so if the mayor of New York
has no power,
193
00:09:03,367 --> 00:09:04,826
what the hell are we supposed to do?
194
00:09:04,827 --> 00:09:06,494
Investigate.
195
00:09:06,495 --> 00:09:09,372
I-If you find something,
maybe we can take Bash down together.
196
00:09:09,373 --> 00:09:12,292
Oh, my God, that would be
amazing for my numbers.
197
00:09:12,293 --> 00:09:14,794
City people hate billionaires right now.
198
00:09:14,795 --> 00:09:17,088
We're trying,
but we can't even find him.
199
00:09:17,089 --> 00:09:19,716
Well, the other day,
I overheard Romy on the phone.
200
00:09:19,717 --> 00:09:23,511
Apparently, he's hosting
some big, secret rich people meeting.
201
00:09:23,512 --> 00:09:27,307
Let me guess.
With Camila White and Jay Pflug?
202
00:09:27,308 --> 00:09:31,102
Yep, at his country estate
in the middle of nowhere,
203
00:09:31,103 --> 00:09:33,605
no servants, no service, no witnesses.
204
00:09:33,606 --> 00:09:35,940
I'm not saying
that they're doing blood rituals,
205
00:09:35,941 --> 00:09:37,525
but I have heard rumors
that it's exactly that.
206
00:09:37,526 --> 00:09:39,152
Yes.
207
00:09:39,153 --> 00:09:40,528
Do you have an address?
208
00:09:40,529 --> 00:09:42,406
Yes, the address,
so we can never go there.
209
00:09:43,491 --> 00:09:45,617
Oliver, maybe by surprising him,
210
00:09:45,618 --> 00:09:47,619
we can find something to take him down.
211
00:09:47,620 --> 00:09:50,580
Yes, and if we end up dead,
the mayor can just get Bash on that.
212
00:09:50,581 --> 00:09:51,665
Oh. Smart.
213
00:09:52,875 --> 00:09:54,459
Oh, I mean, as a backup plan.
214
00:09:54,460 --> 00:09:55,835
What backup plan?
215
00:09:55,836 --> 00:09:57,378
Oh, Romy!
216
00:09:57,379 --> 00:09:59,756
Hey. Yeah, we were, uh,
217
00:09:59,757 --> 00:10:01,716
just talking about, um, birth control.
218
00:10:01,717 --> 00:10:03,843
- Yeah.
- Morning-after pill.
219
00:10:03,844 --> 00:10:05,595
Yeah, I need it.
220
00:10:05,596 --> 00:10:07,097
Feminism.
221
00:10:07,098 --> 00:10:09,641
You know, the...
The right to choose-a-roni.
222
00:10:09,642 --> 00:10:11,226
We should go.
223
00:10:11,227 --> 00:10:13,228
Ribbon cutting
at the New York City Ballet.
224
00:10:13,229 --> 00:10:14,938
God, snooze.
225
00:10:14,939 --> 00:10:16,606
Sarah Jessica Parker's gonna be there.
226
00:10:16,607 --> 00:10:18,691
- She's friends with my uncle.
- And wide awake!
227
00:10:18,692 --> 00:10:20,652
Let's go. Thank you.
228
00:10:20,653 --> 00:10:22,362
Uh, sorry for the chicken scratch.
229
00:10:22,363 --> 00:10:25,163
If I get reelected, first thing
I'm gonna do is fix the public schools.
230
00:10:29,245 --> 00:10:32,039
Do either of you see how insane this is?
231
00:10:32,748 --> 00:10:34,958
We're about to face off
with the most dangerous suspect
232
00:10:34,959 --> 00:10:37,043
we've ever had... in the wilderness.
233
00:10:37,044 --> 00:10:40,089
- Oliver, we're going to Connecticut.
- Yeah, well, Putnams don't do foliage.
234
00:10:41,006 --> 00:10:43,091
In fact, I... I should probably
stay home and text my poor wife
235
00:10:43,092 --> 00:10:46,094
who's on hour 18 of her United delay.
236
00:10:46,095 --> 00:10:49,180
She's boarded and deboarded
four separate times
237
00:10:49,181 --> 00:10:51,391
and spent $900 at Hudson News.
238
00:10:51,392 --> 00:10:55,186
Well, I for one, am going in
scorched earth, guns blazing,
239
00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:57,230
hell hath no fury like a Savage scorned.
240
00:10:57,231 --> 00:10:59,732
Come on, Oliver, I know
you wanna take those cowboy boots
241
00:10:59,733 --> 00:11:01,734
out for a spin in the country.
242
00:11:01,735 --> 00:11:04,904
- Didn't you get those from Wonder Woman?
- Linda Lavin.
243
00:11:04,905 --> 00:11:06,197
- Ah.
- Do they come in a men's?
244
00:11:06,198 --> 00:11:07,532
They're unisex!
245
00:11:07,533 --> 00:11:09,659
And a piece of Broadway history.
246
00:11:09,660 --> 00:11:12,412
She wore them in
Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.
247
00:11:12,413 --> 00:11:16,249
And in a private viewing,
only the boots.
248
00:11:16,250 --> 00:11:18,877
- Ew.
- But that's beside the point.
249
00:11:18,878 --> 00:11:21,087
This is crazy, and I'm not going.
250
00:11:21,088 --> 00:11:23,048
We have to, for Lester.
251
00:11:24,466 --> 00:11:27,928
And if it gets all Eyes Wide Shut,
then we can leave.
252
00:11:29,430 --> 00:11:32,140
Alright, I'll go.
253
00:11:32,141 --> 00:11:33,474
For the boots.
254
00:11:33,475 --> 00:11:36,728
And I'm sending my wife
a cute little selfie of me in them,
255
00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:38,981
so she can ID my body!
256
00:11:40,691 --> 00:11:43,736
He's gotta relax.
How scary can a country house be?
257
00:11:48,324 --> 00:11:50,200
Bash's den of lies.
258
00:11:52,703 --> 00:11:55,955
I wonder what room he was in
when he first posed as Priscilla
259
00:11:55,956 --> 00:11:58,917
with the conniving line,
"I really like your profile.
260
00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:02,003
If you could add one color
to the rainbow, what would it be?"
261
00:12:02,004 --> 00:12:04,465
- What'd you answer?
- Brown.
262
00:12:05,883 --> 00:12:08,885
Well, the landscape is very... lush.
263
00:12:08,886 --> 00:12:10,178
Yeah, that's what happens
264
00:12:10,190 --> 00:12:11,710
when you fertilize with human remains.
265
00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:16,893
Oh, great!
We... We lost service a mile back.
266
00:12:16,894 --> 00:12:19,312
Now, Loretta's gonna think
that I'm in danger.
267
00:12:19,313 --> 00:12:21,981
And newsflash, I am!
268
00:12:21,982 --> 00:12:24,442
Oliver, calm down.
269
00:12:24,443 --> 00:12:27,613
There's nothing to worry about.
Just don't look to your three o'clock.
270
00:12:30,741 --> 00:12:33,201
Do we think he's real,
or are we gonna find out
271
00:12:33,202 --> 00:12:35,037
he died 50 years ago in a fire?
272
00:12:37,581 --> 00:12:39,624
I like your skin.
273
00:12:39,625 --> 00:12:40,709
Ah.
274
00:12:41,835 --> 00:12:44,922
That's the first compliment
that ever made my bowels evacuate.
275
00:12:45,297 --> 00:12:46,798
Hi.
276
00:12:46,799 --> 00:12:49,092
Uh, i-is your dad home?
277
00:12:49,093 --> 00:12:51,177
Or maybe he's your grandpa?
278
00:12:51,178 --> 00:12:52,512
Or son.
279
00:12:52,513 --> 00:12:54,764
If that's the plot twist
of this horror movie.
280
00:12:56,725 --> 00:12:59,060
He's inside with the others.
281
00:12:59,061 --> 00:13:03,065
But Daddy says little boys who interrupt
get sent to the cellar.
282
00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:05,650
Okay.
283
00:13:05,651 --> 00:13:07,026
Well, thank you.
284
00:13:07,027 --> 00:13:10,698
And you know, good luck
with your... shiv.
285
00:13:23,043 --> 00:13:24,544
Okay, I... I've seen enough.
286
00:13:24,545 --> 00:13:26,879
How 'bout we beat traffic,
avoid getting hunted,
287
00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:29,091
- and hung on a wall?
- Shh.
288
00:13:30,092 --> 00:13:32,970
Listen.
289
00:13:37,891 --> 00:13:40,935
First, I'll remove the spleen.
290
00:13:40,936 --> 00:13:42,603
Careful.
291
00:13:42,604 --> 00:13:45,316
They're harvesting organs
to sell on the black market.
292
00:13:46,692 --> 00:13:49,987
Next, I'll take the kidney.
293
00:13:55,909 --> 00:13:58,244
Dammit!
294
00:13:58,245 --> 00:14:00,581
It's always the wishbone.
295
00:14:01,498 --> 00:14:02,915
They're playing...
296
00:14:02,916 --> 00:14:04,208
Operation?
297
00:14:04,209 --> 00:14:08,463
♪ The leg bone's
connected to the hip bone ♪
298
00:14:08,464 --> 00:14:10,965
Well, just three adults
playing a children's game.
299
00:14:10,966 --> 00:14:12,717
Not at all creepy.
300
00:14:12,718 --> 00:14:13,969
I'm good to go.
301
00:14:18,140 --> 00:14:19,932
Hi!
302
00:14:19,933 --> 00:14:21,852
Trespassers.
303
00:14:23,771 --> 00:14:25,688
Naughty, naughty.
304
00:14:31,820 --> 00:14:34,906
You said today would be private.
What are they doing here?
305
00:14:34,907 --> 00:14:38,034
Better question,
what are you doing here?
306
00:14:38,035 --> 00:14:41,871
Playing board games
in the privacy of my own home.
307
00:14:41,872 --> 00:14:43,164
Oh, please.
308
00:14:43,165 --> 00:14:45,625
We know what happens
when the three of you get together.
309
00:14:45,626 --> 00:14:48,002
Even if it looks like
a game of Operation,
310
00:14:48,003 --> 00:14:50,297
we know you're always
playing for something.
311
00:14:52,508 --> 00:14:53,967
Might as well show them.
312
00:15:03,477 --> 00:15:06,687
Okay, a trophy from Walgreens?
313
00:15:06,688 --> 00:15:08,249
Well, there were only so many times
314
00:15:08,261 --> 00:15:10,149
we could destroy
each other's businesses
315
00:15:10,150 --> 00:15:11,984
before it got boring,
316
00:15:11,985 --> 00:15:14,195
so we started having game nights.
317
00:15:14,196 --> 00:15:16,864
Gives us an outlet
for ruthless competition.
318
00:15:16,865 --> 00:15:18,241
And gossip.
319
00:15:18,242 --> 00:15:20,618
Warren Buffet shaves his bikini line.
320
00:15:20,619 --> 00:15:23,329
- Oh!
- Oh! What?
321
00:15:23,330 --> 00:15:24,872
Okay, fine.
322
00:15:24,873 --> 00:15:27,834
Well, if that's all you guys are doing,
323
00:15:27,835 --> 00:15:31,504
I'm sure you wouldn't mind if we stayed
and watched a little, right?
324
00:15:31,505 --> 00:15:34,715
No, no, no, I... I think...
I think we've overstayed our welcome.
325
00:15:34,716 --> 00:15:35,842
Nonsense.
326
00:15:35,843 --> 00:15:37,844
Please stay.
327
00:15:37,845 --> 00:15:38,929
I insist.
328
00:15:49,523 --> 00:15:51,399
Yahtzee!
329
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:53,901
Well, that wraps up round seven.
330
00:15:53,902 --> 00:15:56,112
Maybe they really are
just playing board games?
331
00:15:56,113 --> 00:15:59,198
No, no. No, no, no. I'm telling
you, these people are killers.
332
00:15:59,199 --> 00:16:01,951
They played Monopoly start to finish
and no one flipped the board over.
333
00:16:01,952 --> 00:16:03,078
Sociopathic.
334
00:16:03,537 --> 00:16:05,329
Now, please excuse me.
335
00:16:05,330 --> 00:16:07,499
I have business to attend to.
336
00:16:11,712 --> 00:16:14,673
I'll follow him.
Maybe I can get him to talk to me.
337
00:16:20,095 --> 00:16:23,139
Okay, I'm on Pflug duty.
Oliver, you're on Camila.
338
00:16:23,140 --> 00:16:25,183
Whatever happened, the three of them
339
00:16:25,184 --> 00:16:27,310
are clearly in on it together.
340
00:16:27,311 --> 00:16:28,395
Oh, yes.
341
00:16:35,611 --> 00:16:40,532
So, um, how does gaming here
compare to gaming at The Arconia?
342
00:16:43,494 --> 00:16:45,746
How's your apartment, Oliver?
343
00:16:47,539 --> 00:16:50,500
My apartment? Well, um...
344
00:16:50,501 --> 00:16:55,296
I was thinking of selling.
Uh, got an insanely good offer.
345
00:16:55,297 --> 00:16:56,548
Oh.
346
00:16:59,009 --> 00:17:01,178
What, that's all you have
to say to me about it?
347
00:17:02,346 --> 00:17:03,846
Should there be more?
348
00:17:03,847 --> 00:17:06,224
How about, um, mm-mm...
349
00:17:06,225 --> 00:17:08,476
"Thank you"?
350
00:17:09,978 --> 00:17:13,272
I transformed your sad, purple hovel
351
00:17:13,273 --> 00:17:15,441
into a camel-toned fantasy land.
352
00:17:15,442 --> 00:17:18,027
I said "camel-toned."
353
00:17:18,028 --> 00:17:21,239
When I met you, you had
zero tassels on your pillows.
354
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:24,659
And now, look at you,
Tassel King of the Upper West Side,
355
00:17:24,660 --> 00:17:25,868
all because of me.
356
00:17:25,869 --> 00:17:27,745
The disrespect.
357
00:17:27,746 --> 00:17:31,457
I should cut off your balls
and shave them into a potpourri.
358
00:17:34,002 --> 00:17:37,464
Sorry, I downed an entire bottle
of Chablis on the 'copter over.
359
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:40,591
You have a question for me?
360
00:17:40,592 --> 00:17:42,218
Mm-mm. Mm-mm, mm.
361
00:17:42,219 --> 00:17:43,303
Okay.
362
00:17:59,736 --> 00:18:01,989
You followed me all the way out here.
363
00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:06,492
Do you have something to say?
364
00:18:06,493 --> 00:18:09,705
I was sort of waiting
till you put down the big blade.
365
00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:13,874
This is a skin tree.
366
00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:17,963
The bark helps
with my Algernon's digestion.
367
00:18:19,673 --> 00:18:20,674
Oh, look.
368
00:18:22,009 --> 00:18:23,343
There's Algie in the pool.
369
00:18:27,097 --> 00:18:28,223
How fun.
370
00:18:29,641 --> 00:18:34,271
I was going to cover the pool up,
but Algie loves to swim.
371
00:18:37,274 --> 00:18:39,692
Now, when my other children were young,
372
00:18:39,693 --> 00:18:43,946
I was too busy building my empire
to be a good daddy.
373
00:18:43,947 --> 00:18:48,409
So, with Algie, I promised
to never miss a single bedtime,
374
00:18:48,410 --> 00:18:50,037
and I never have.
375
00:18:51,079 --> 00:18:54,541
Don't try to be sympathetic, Priscilla.
376
00:18:56,209 --> 00:18:57,753
You catfished me.
377
00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:02,548
You preyed on a buffed-up,
albeit older, romantic looking for love,
378
00:19:02,549 --> 00:19:06,302
but I guess that behavior
is to be expected from a murderer.
379
00:19:11,308 --> 00:19:13,517
I am not a murderer.
380
00:19:13,518 --> 00:19:14,936
I hate death.
381
00:19:16,021 --> 00:19:18,481
I lost my papa when I was very young.
382
00:19:18,482 --> 00:19:21,442
That's what sparked
my fascination with longevity.
383
00:19:21,443 --> 00:19:26,530
You know, the micro-naps,
cryo-chamber, stem-cell shakes.
384
00:19:26,531 --> 00:19:29,242
Everyone thinks it's born out of vanity.
385
00:19:30,911 --> 00:19:36,123
But the truth is, I want my Algie
to keep his papa...
386
00:19:37,501 --> 00:19:38,919
...possibly forever.
387
00:19:40,045 --> 00:19:44,174
Father, is it time
for my gesunde Leckerei?
388
00:19:45,509 --> 00:19:46,509
My boy.
389
00:19:46,510 --> 00:19:48,803
He loves his healthy treat.
390
00:19:48,804 --> 00:19:50,262
Now, if you'll excuse me.
391
00:19:50,263 --> 00:19:51,598
Oh, Charles.
392
00:19:52,683 --> 00:19:54,434
I wish you nothing but happiness.
393
00:20:08,532 --> 00:20:09,892
Looking for something?
394
00:20:10,784 --> 00:20:14,662
Or are you joining us
for a game of hide-and-seek?
395
00:20:14,663 --> 00:20:18,040
Sorry, HR won't let me
play games with my boss,
396
00:20:18,041 --> 00:20:21,502
which you are, because you bought us
and then shut us down.
397
00:20:21,503 --> 00:20:24,213
Yeah, I... Well, yeah...
I'm sorry about that.
398
00:20:24,214 --> 00:20:27,717
I couldn't let you talk shit about me
in a murder podcast.
399
00:20:27,718 --> 00:20:29,593
Accusations like that...
400
00:20:29,594 --> 00:20:32,263
I'm just trying to protect my family.
401
00:20:32,264 --> 00:20:35,224
You keep making excuses,
yet I have no evidence
402
00:20:35,225 --> 00:20:37,393
that you're actually a good guy.
403
00:20:37,394 --> 00:20:41,273
Well, if you responded to my texts,
I would show you that I am one.
404
00:20:42,107 --> 00:20:44,817
HR also won't let me date bosses.
405
00:20:44,818 --> 00:20:48,320
Plus, there's that whole thing
where you're a suspect.
406
00:20:48,321 --> 00:20:49,697
Mm, fair.
407
00:20:49,698 --> 00:20:52,617
But if I wasn't,
could I take you out to dinner?
408
00:20:54,828 --> 00:20:57,747
I'm not a Bond villain. I promise.
409
00:20:57,748 --> 00:20:59,623
Although I do have a white cat
and my dad's office
410
00:20:59,624 --> 00:21:01,710
is located on the side of a mountain.
411
00:21:05,464 --> 00:21:09,759
Look, I know my friends are eccentric.
412
00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:14,222
But really, we're just a bunch of bored,
rich people hashing out a bet.
413
00:21:14,890 --> 00:21:16,682
The same one we were trying
to settle the last time
414
00:21:16,683 --> 00:21:17,934
we were in that gaming parlor.
415
00:21:19,686 --> 00:21:21,313
Do you mean when Lester died?
416
00:21:22,522 --> 00:21:23,523
Uh...
417
00:21:24,065 --> 00:21:25,358
What do you know?
418
00:21:27,611 --> 00:21:29,195
Fine. Don't tell me.
419
00:21:29,196 --> 00:21:30,989
I'll find out myself.
420
00:21:32,741 --> 00:21:34,366
Shit.
421
00:21:34,367 --> 00:21:36,285
Alright, cut the shit.
422
00:21:36,286 --> 00:21:40,373
Jay admitted this is about
way more than a stupid trophy.
423
00:21:42,459 --> 00:21:46,338
So, you don't wanna answer
our questions, fine.
424
00:21:47,547 --> 00:21:49,131
We'll do it your way.
425
00:21:49,132 --> 00:21:52,218
We play you for answers.
426
00:21:52,219 --> 00:21:55,554
- Wait, Mabel, are you serious?
- You wanna play games with them?!
427
00:21:55,555 --> 00:21:57,973
The last time they were doing that,
two whole people died.
428
00:21:57,974 --> 00:21:59,476
If we win...
429
00:22:00,393 --> 00:22:02,228
we wanna know everything.
430
00:22:02,229 --> 00:22:03,980
A ratcheting up of the stakes.
431
00:22:04,898 --> 00:22:06,733
Leaning in, liking.
432
00:22:07,734 --> 00:22:09,652
What happens if you lose?
433
00:22:11,738 --> 00:22:14,533
We stop investigating you, forever.
434
00:22:19,663 --> 00:22:20,664
Fine.
435
00:22:22,249 --> 00:22:23,749
And when we win,
436
00:22:23,750 --> 00:22:26,043
if you don't hold
to your end of the bargain,
437
00:22:26,044 --> 00:22:27,254
we'll kill you.
438
00:22:31,299 --> 00:22:33,300
Kidding.
439
00:22:33,301 --> 00:22:35,928
And that's a wrap on me.
440
00:22:35,929 --> 00:22:37,847
Bye, everybody.
Enjoy your twisted game night.
441
00:22:37,848 --> 00:22:40,099
Oliver, you can't leave.
442
00:22:40,100 --> 00:22:42,268
What about doing this for Lester?
You're being selfish.
443
00:22:42,269 --> 00:22:45,396
Yeah, enough with
"Oliver is selfish" shtick.
444
00:22:45,397 --> 00:22:47,106
And you're not doing this for Lester,
445
00:22:47,118 --> 00:22:49,024
you're just mad you
got scammed online.
446
00:22:49,025 --> 00:22:52,903
And besides, unlike you two,
I have someone to lose.
447
00:22:52,904 --> 00:22:55,322
I'm sorry, but it's true.
448
00:22:55,323 --> 00:22:59,618
So, if you wanna risk your lives
playing a game, go for it.
449
00:22:59,619 --> 00:23:00,786
But I'm out.
450
00:23:08,420 --> 00:23:10,045
Ladies and gentlemen,
451
00:23:10,046 --> 00:23:11,797
the game is Celebrity.
452
00:23:11,798 --> 00:23:14,174
How many famous people
can you guess in a minute?
453
00:23:14,175 --> 00:23:16,385
One round, winner takes all.
454
00:23:16,386 --> 00:23:18,471
Our team will draw a category first.
455
00:23:20,432 --> 00:23:22,016
"Historical figures."
456
00:23:22,017 --> 00:23:24,018
Do you think they know about history?
457
00:23:24,019 --> 00:23:26,437
No way.
They're too busy with world domination
458
00:23:26,438 --> 00:23:28,023
to read biographies.
459
00:23:29,441 --> 00:23:31,734
Mm-hmm. Okay.
460
00:23:31,735 --> 00:23:33,777
Start the timer... now!
461
00:23:35,363 --> 00:23:38,490
He comes to my, um,
uh, my Labor Day party every year
462
00:23:38,491 --> 00:23:41,076
- and bakes a pineapple upside-down cake.
- Vladimir Putin!
463
00:23:42,662 --> 00:23:45,998
Um, um, Jay, he and your granddad
did... did sleepaway camp
464
00:23:45,999 --> 00:23:48,083
- in the Schwarzwild.
- Uh, Henry Kissinger!
465
00:23:48,084 --> 00:23:51,170
Um, um... Oh, good God.
466
00:23:51,171 --> 00:23:53,797
He will not shut up
about Crumbl Cookies.
467
00:23:53,798 --> 00:23:55,299
Kim Jong Un!
468
00:23:55,300 --> 00:23:58,135
What are we gonna do?
469
00:23:58,136 --> 00:24:00,054
Hope for an easier category.
470
00:24:00,055 --> 00:24:01,305
This guy.
471
00:24:01,306 --> 00:24:02,546
Bernie Sanders!
472
00:24:03,934 --> 00:24:07,353
Camila, um, he and you,
uh, call each other "Bunny Face,"
473
00:24:07,354 --> 00:24:08,979
- and I don't know why.
- Xi Jinping,
474
00:24:08,980 --> 00:24:10,397
and the reason is just for us!
475
00:24:11,650 --> 00:24:13,233
Time.
476
00:24:15,028 --> 00:24:16,987
You got five.
477
00:24:16,988 --> 00:24:19,365
- Oh. Mm. Hmm.
- Yeah.
478
00:24:21,326 --> 00:24:22,952
Bravo, Papa.
479
00:24:22,953 --> 00:24:26,206
Algie, to the cellar.
480
00:24:31,127 --> 00:24:32,295
Your turn.
481
00:24:39,719 --> 00:24:40,970
Don't worry, we got this.
482
00:24:40,971 --> 00:24:42,597
We're smart people. We know things.
483
00:24:44,808 --> 00:24:47,143
Okay, our category is...
484
00:24:50,105 --> 00:24:51,563
"Broadway."
485
00:24:54,567 --> 00:24:56,193
♪ The coffee cup ♪
486
00:24:56,194 --> 00:24:58,362
♪ I think about you ♪
487
00:24:58,363 --> 00:25:03,243
♪ I love you so,
it's like I'm losing my mind ♪
488
00:25:06,913 --> 00:25:09,832
♪ Lions and tigers
and bears, oh, shit! ♪
489
00:25:09,833 --> 00:25:12,209
♪ Lions and tigers and bears ♪
Oh, shit!
490
00:25:12,210 --> 00:25:14,044
How do we not have Oliver for this?
491
00:25:14,045 --> 00:25:15,754
It's okay. You know Broadway, right?
492
00:25:15,755 --> 00:25:18,257
Yes, I've seen one play once,
493
00:25:18,258 --> 00:25:20,467
and it was the first 15 seconds
of Death Rattle,
494
00:25:20,468 --> 00:25:22,344
before Ben Glenroy dropped dead.
495
00:25:22,345 --> 00:25:24,680
Just do your best, no pressure.
Well, some pressure.
496
00:25:24,681 --> 00:25:26,890
Our entire investigation depends on it.
497
00:25:29,769 --> 00:25:32,187
Your time starts now.
498
00:25:32,188 --> 00:25:33,898
Okay, um...
499
00:25:34,691 --> 00:25:35,733
Pass.
500
00:25:35,734 --> 00:25:36,817
Hold on.
501
00:25:36,818 --> 00:25:38,068
No, pass.
502
00:25:38,069 --> 00:25:40,696
- Say something, Mabel.
- I'm trying! Pass.
503
00:25:40,697 --> 00:25:42,072
- Pass.
- Anything but "pass"!
504
00:25:42,073 --> 00:25:44,116
Ugh! Where's Oliver when you need him?
505
00:25:44,117 --> 00:25:46,160
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
I know this one.
506
00:25:46,161 --> 00:25:47,786
The boots! She was naked in the boots.
507
00:25:47,787 --> 00:25:49,455
Linda Lavin!
508
00:25:49,456 --> 00:25:52,041
Okay, Oliver claims
he was an assistant doula
509
00:25:52,042 --> 00:25:53,584
- at her birth.
- Uh, Lea Michele!
510
00:25:53,585 --> 00:25:55,836
Oliver says he and this person
511
00:25:55,837 --> 00:25:58,255
took an Ativan and slept through
all of Hurricane Sandy.
512
00:25:58,256 --> 00:25:59,507
Hugh Jackman!
513
00:26:00,759 --> 00:26:02,242
Oliver claims he invented both the
514
00:26:02,254 --> 00:26:03,969
name "Adele Dazeem" and her real one.
515
00:26:03,970 --> 00:26:07,389
The wickedly talented Idina Menzel!
516
00:26:07,390 --> 00:26:09,183
Ugh, Oliver's biggest beef is with...?
517
00:26:09,184 --> 00:26:11,727
The Jessica... Angela Lansbury!
518
00:26:11,728 --> 00:26:14,313
Oliver says she stole his haircut.
519
00:26:14,314 --> 00:26:15,981
Cynthia Nixon!
520
00:26:15,982 --> 00:26:17,232
- Time.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!
521
00:26:21,738 --> 00:26:23,447
You motherfuckers beat us.
522
00:26:23,448 --> 00:26:25,574
We sure did.
523
00:26:25,575 --> 00:26:28,870
Now, tell us what you were playing for.
524
00:26:33,625 --> 00:26:34,626
Okay.
525
00:26:36,169 --> 00:26:40,964
The night your doorman died,
we played for a very big contract,
526
00:26:40,965 --> 00:26:42,841
probably the biggest development project
527
00:26:42,842 --> 00:26:46,345
to hit New York City
since... Grand Central.
528
00:26:46,346 --> 00:26:48,473
- The most important...
- Oh, my God!
529
00:26:49,307 --> 00:26:52,601
One of you is planning to build
New York City's first casino.
530
00:26:52,602 --> 00:26:54,270
I was ramping up.
531
00:26:56,189 --> 00:26:57,357
But yes.
532
00:26:58,441 --> 00:27:00,068
We all have our proposals.
533
00:27:01,319 --> 00:27:04,446
Tonight's winner
gets to see theirs come to life.
534
00:27:04,447 --> 00:27:06,949
That's a terrible idea.
535
00:27:06,950 --> 00:27:09,368
You think a casino
would be good for the city?
536
00:27:09,369 --> 00:27:11,662
I think about how much money
it would make.
537
00:27:11,663 --> 00:27:13,622
How much power the owner would wield.
538
00:27:13,623 --> 00:27:15,499
And how it's a chance to make your name
539
00:27:15,500 --> 00:27:17,167
synonymous with New York City history.
540
00:27:17,168 --> 00:27:18,710
That's Rockefeller shit.
541
00:27:18,711 --> 00:27:19,879
How noble.
542
00:27:21,005 --> 00:27:24,883
And how do you three
just get to decide that, anyway?
543
00:27:24,884 --> 00:27:27,594
Deals have always been made
in back rooms.
544
00:27:27,595 --> 00:27:30,139
Games are just our way of making it fun.
545
00:27:30,140 --> 00:27:33,600
That still doesn't explain why you
edited the footage from that night.
546
00:27:33,601 --> 00:27:38,105
Well, frankly, I don't like anyone
knowing my comings and goings.
547
00:27:38,106 --> 00:27:41,817
Yesterday, I treated Algernon
to a Jamba Juice.
548
00:27:41,818 --> 00:27:44,403
- Ooh.
- Scrubbed that, too.
549
00:27:44,404 --> 00:27:46,405
Mm. And we wouldn't want people
550
00:27:46,406 --> 00:27:49,199
losing faith in the system,
now, would we?
551
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:52,035
So, you didn't kill anyone?
552
00:27:52,036 --> 00:27:54,706
This has nothing to do with our doorman?
553
00:27:56,666 --> 00:28:01,003
This is about a casino
and a stupid trophy?
554
00:28:04,716 --> 00:28:06,091
Are you guys good?
555
00:28:06,092 --> 00:28:09,595
We just really like the trophy.
Put the trophy down.
556
00:28:22,609 --> 00:28:25,862
Your prize is our fucking finger.
557
00:28:35,246 --> 00:28:37,289
Come on, you overpriced brick.
558
00:28:37,290 --> 00:28:40,335
Survived a hot bowl of barley soup,
and now you crap out?
559
00:28:41,294 --> 00:28:44,755
Thank Mary Tyler Moore.
560
00:28:44,756 --> 00:28:47,549
Oh, dear.
561
00:28:50,053 --> 00:28:51,511
Oh, mother's balls!
562
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:55,515
You think he knows
he's goin' to the vet?
563
00:28:55,516 --> 00:28:57,559
Well, if he didn't, he does now.
564
00:28:59,729 --> 00:29:02,356
Ooh, it's one of those "Silver Alerts."
565
00:29:02,357 --> 00:29:03,523
Always so sad
566
00:29:03,524 --> 00:29:05,804
- when an old person goes missing.
- Aw.
567
00:29:05,944 --> 00:29:08,320
Oh, thank God! Thank God.
568
00:29:08,321 --> 00:29:10,113
You gotta save me!
569
00:29:10,114 --> 00:29:13,784
I'm in danger.
570
00:29:13,785 --> 00:29:16,828
You poor thing.
Anyone we can call for you?
571
00:29:16,829 --> 00:29:19,748
Well, I tried my wife,
and... and no reception.
572
00:29:19,749 --> 00:29:23,043
Plus, she's probably halfway
to New Zealand to shoot her TV show.
573
00:29:23,044 --> 00:29:24,544
She's a Hollywood actress.
574
00:29:24,545 --> 00:29:27,881
Of course, she is.
575
00:29:27,882 --> 00:29:29,967
- Uh, should we try the police station?
- Uh...
576
00:29:29,968 --> 00:29:32,386
No, no! No, no, no.
The police are in on it.
577
00:29:32,387 --> 00:29:33,596
Goes all the way to the top.
578
00:29:34,264 --> 00:29:38,267
The mayor told me this morning
when he came over to record my podcast.
579
00:29:38,268 --> 00:29:40,895
- I bet he did.
- Yeah.
580
00:29:42,230 --> 00:29:43,940
End of the day is toughest.
581
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:50,195
- Gotta get the hell outta here.
- We gotta call a car.
582
00:29:50,196 --> 00:29:51,738
Oh!
583
00:29:51,739 --> 00:29:53,949
So, you're a "good guy," huh?
584
00:29:53,950 --> 00:29:56,660
Mabel, you're in more danger
than you think with that finger.
585
00:29:56,661 --> 00:29:58,913
You have no idea
what they paid to get that.
586
00:29:59,998 --> 00:30:00,999
Paid who?
587
00:30:03,459 --> 00:30:04,459
Wait.
588
00:30:04,460 --> 00:30:08,005
So then, this is your legacy?
589
00:30:08,006 --> 00:30:11,050
Trapping a woman at one
of your game nights to get it back?
590
00:30:12,343 --> 00:30:15,763
- A woman and her friend.
- Is no one going to stop them?
591
00:30:16,597 --> 00:30:17,597
Really?
592
00:30:17,598 --> 00:30:19,641
Okay, go. Now.
593
00:30:19,642 --> 00:30:20,727
Now.
594
00:30:24,063 --> 00:30:27,065
And Zach Galifianakis
is playing me in the movie, so...
595
00:30:27,066 --> 00:30:29,943
- Well, isn't that wonderful?
- Yeah.
596
00:30:29,944 --> 00:30:34,323
Alright, let's hop on in.
We can drop off Blaze on the way.
597
00:30:34,324 --> 00:30:37,451
Oh, God, I... Really,
I cannot thank you two enough.
598
00:30:37,452 --> 00:30:39,202
I mean...
599
00:30:39,203 --> 00:30:42,289
...if I had to walk back
to Manhattan in these boots,
600
00:30:42,290 --> 00:30:44,666
Charles and Mabel
would never let me live it down.
601
00:30:44,667 --> 00:30:47,377
Are those your friends?
Um, should we give them a call?
602
00:30:47,378 --> 00:30:50,422
Well, actually they're...
they're at Bash Steed's place,
603
00:30:50,423 --> 00:30:51,965
uh, with no service, so...
604
00:30:51,966 --> 00:30:53,508
- Bash Steed.
- Yeah.
605
00:30:53,509 --> 00:30:55,927
They can't be that good of friends then,
606
00:30:55,928 --> 00:30:58,889
if they let you wander off
all on your lonesome.
607
00:30:58,890 --> 00:31:01,475
Well, actually,
they're... they're great friends.
608
00:31:01,476 --> 00:31:03,017
I mean, if it wasn't for them, who
609
00:31:03,029 --> 00:31:04,811
knows what would have happened to me?
610
00:31:04,812 --> 00:31:07,981
I... I... I wouldn't have a podcast.
611
00:31:07,982 --> 00:31:10,567
I wouldn't have met the love of my life.
612
00:31:10,568 --> 00:31:12,694
And I certainly
wouldn't have reconnected
613
00:31:12,695 --> 00:31:15,281
with my best friend, Ron-Ron Howard.
614
00:31:16,908 --> 00:31:18,992
- I call him Ron-Ron.
- Wow.
615
00:31:18,993 --> 00:31:20,452
Yeah.
616
00:31:20,453 --> 00:31:22,371
- Uh, well, I...
- Meanwhile, I'm the one
617
00:31:22,372 --> 00:31:24,748
who left them alone with a group
618
00:31:24,749 --> 00:31:28,668
of deeply unwell rich people,
you know?
619
00:31:28,669 --> 00:31:30,379
I mean, they... they can't even
call an Uber.
620
00:31:30,380 --> 00:31:32,006
They have no way out of there.
621
00:31:33,549 --> 00:31:35,927
Oh, my God. What have I done?
622
00:31:37,178 --> 00:31:40,055
- I need you to drive me back!
- No can do, hon.
623
00:31:40,056 --> 00:31:41,932
We're gonna take you
somewhere safe. Get in.
624
00:31:41,933 --> 00:31:45,560
No, no. I'm gonna save my friends
from murderous billionaires!
625
00:31:45,561 --> 00:31:47,230
And if you won't drive me...
626
00:31:49,690 --> 00:31:51,733
- I'm taking the horse!
- Oh.
627
00:31:51,734 --> 00:31:53,819
Oh, oh! Come on, buddy.
628
00:31:53,820 --> 00:31:57,531
I have a strong sense
you're not the best on bareback.
629
00:31:57,532 --> 00:32:00,742
I'll have you know
that I am the first and last director
630
00:32:00,743 --> 00:32:02,619
to ever stage Equus with a live...
631
00:32:04,539 --> 00:32:06,290
Is everything out here demonic?
632
00:32:07,291 --> 00:32:09,960
How am I gonna get back to my friends?!
633
00:32:09,961 --> 00:32:12,254
Dammit!
How are we gonna get out of here?
634
00:32:12,255 --> 00:32:13,506
Mabel.
635
00:32:15,091 --> 00:32:16,133
Shit.
636
00:32:16,134 --> 00:32:18,510
You know, there's something I
have to say, and I have to say it fast
637
00:32:18,511 --> 00:32:21,263
before I get, uh, sent to the cellar
with Algernon.
638
00:32:21,264 --> 00:32:22,347
What?
639
00:32:22,348 --> 00:32:25,016
Oliver was right.
I threw myself into this case
640
00:32:25,017 --> 00:32:28,728
because I was sad I got catfished,
and I thought I had nothing to lose.
641
00:32:28,729 --> 00:32:30,522
But I have a lot to lose.
642
00:32:30,523 --> 00:32:32,483
My family.
643
00:32:33,401 --> 00:32:35,235
- You.
- Oliver.
644
00:32:35,236 --> 00:32:36,611
Yeah, Oliver.
645
00:32:36,612 --> 00:32:38,572
No! Oliver!
646
00:32:38,573 --> 00:32:41,741
Get away from my friends,
you sons of bitches!
647
00:32:48,666 --> 00:32:50,542
You came back for us!
648
00:32:50,543 --> 00:32:52,502
- I should never have left!
- No, you were right.
649
00:32:52,503 --> 00:32:54,421
These people are insane.
650
00:32:54,422 --> 00:32:56,089
Mabel, get in!
651
00:32:56,090 --> 00:32:58,425
And we got matches!
652
00:33:00,011 --> 00:33:03,180
Oliver, those Linda
Lavin boots saved us!
653
00:33:03,181 --> 00:33:06,391
- Where are we going?
- ♪ To the Old Town Road ♪
654
00:33:06,392 --> 00:33:08,768
We're riding all the way to Manhattan!
655
00:33:08,769 --> 00:33:09,937
Ha, ha!
656
00:33:11,189 --> 00:33:12,949
I'm not saying we're gonna
get there quickly.
657
00:33:18,946 --> 00:33:22,282
Can't believe this finger has to do
with the first casino
658
00:33:22,283 --> 00:33:24,201
in New York City.
659
00:33:24,202 --> 00:33:26,703
I can't believe that dead finger
is back in my apartment.
660
00:33:26,704 --> 00:33:29,998
I can't believe Loretta
called in a Silver Alert for me.
661
00:33:29,999 --> 00:33:32,126
And it didn't even mention
any of my credits.
662
00:33:34,420 --> 00:33:36,087
Okay, that must be Williams.
663
00:33:36,088 --> 00:33:38,758
I hope she can identify that thing
before it learns to crawl.
664
00:33:39,550 --> 00:33:40,551
Hmm.
665
00:33:41,427 --> 00:33:42,636
Oh, oh.
666
00:33:43,930 --> 00:33:46,056
Oh, uh, look who, uh...
667
00:33:46,057 --> 00:33:49,142
You'll have to excuse me
for arriving so late.
668
00:33:49,143 --> 00:33:51,645
They say don't go to bed mad,
so I thought I'd come
669
00:33:51,646 --> 00:33:53,647
and settle our little tiff.
670
00:33:53,648 --> 00:33:56,399
Hm, you mean the fact that you lied
about the casino
671
00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:59,194
having anything to do with our murder?
672
00:33:59,195 --> 00:34:03,448
Like it or not, that finger
decides the casino bid,
673
00:34:03,449 --> 00:34:06,743
and New York is only
giving out one permit.
674
00:34:06,744 --> 00:34:09,704
I don't know if you've seen
Jay and Bash's proposals,
675
00:34:09,705 --> 00:34:11,498
but they're grotesque.
676
00:34:11,499 --> 00:34:15,126
Jay wants to put his
in the 92nd Street YMCA
677
00:34:15,127 --> 00:34:19,256
because, and I quote,
"A pool would be so sick."
678
00:34:19,257 --> 00:34:23,093
And Bash's big idea is a spaceship
679
00:34:23,094 --> 00:34:27,389
floating over Times Square
and the M&M's store.
680
00:34:27,390 --> 00:34:29,849
- A travesty.
- Hmm. Yeah...
681
00:34:29,850 --> 00:34:32,978
My casino will be different. Bespoke.
682
00:34:32,979 --> 00:34:36,815
I am giving the people of New York
what they don't know they need.
683
00:34:36,816 --> 00:34:38,692
A gambling addiction?
684
00:34:38,693 --> 00:34:41,069
I will make gambling so chic,
685
00:34:41,070 --> 00:34:43,822
Gwyneth Paltrow will shit her capris.
686
00:34:43,823 --> 00:34:46,533
That's really compelling, Camila,
687
00:34:46,534 --> 00:34:49,035
- but we're not giving you the finger.
- Mm-mm.
688
00:34:49,036 --> 00:34:51,204
Oh, I worried you might say that, so...
689
00:34:51,205 --> 00:34:53,456
Give me the finger!
690
00:34:55,126 --> 00:34:57,877
You're bluffing,
and we're not giving you the finger.
691
00:35:00,089 --> 00:35:01,799
Willing to risk it?
692
00:35:02,883 --> 00:35:04,927
Give her the finger.
Give her the finger.
693
00:35:09,557 --> 00:35:14,978
I can't wait to share with the world
my quiet slots.
694
00:35:14,979 --> 00:35:18,107
It's not... "ding!" It's... "ding."
695
00:35:20,693 --> 00:35:24,030
I think I'll start renovations with...
696
00:35:25,031 --> 00:35:27,365
Oliver's apartment.
697
00:35:27,366 --> 00:35:30,327
What are you talking about?
698
00:35:30,328 --> 00:35:32,912
That offer on your place was from me.
699
00:35:32,913 --> 00:35:36,082
I'm the one buying up
all the apartments here,
700
00:35:36,083 --> 00:35:38,252
so I can finally build.
701
00:35:40,838 --> 00:35:43,257
Exclusive first look.
702
00:35:46,802 --> 00:35:49,095
The Camila Club?
703
00:35:49,096 --> 00:35:51,014
Is that...
704
00:35:51,015 --> 00:35:52,515
Our lobby?
705
00:35:53,851 --> 00:35:55,394
Our courtyard?
706
00:35:56,395 --> 00:35:59,981
You're turning The
Arconia into a casino?
707
00:36:01,275 --> 00:36:03,860
Well, have a good night.
708
00:36:03,861 --> 00:36:07,031
Hopefully, they'll have murders
in your next building, too.
709
00:36:14,085 --> 00:36:19,443
sync & corrections awaqeded
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