* Discovering something That doesn't exist d.
Hey!
D Or giving a monkey a shower *
* Surfing tidal waves *
* Creating nano-bots Or locating Frankenstein's brain d.
It's over here!
D Finding a Dodo bird *
* Painting a continent *
* Or driving our sister insane *
Phineas!
D As you can see There's a whole lot of stuff to do *
* Before school starts this fall d.
Come on, Perry!
D So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb Are gonna do it all! *
* So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb Are gonna do it all! d.
Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!
Is it here yet?
Sorry, boys. Not today.
Aw, rats.
Oh! Wait, boys.
I almost forgot, your mom's Penny shopper.
Hey.
When are you two gonna move that stupid box out of the doorway?
Box? When did that come?
The delivery guy brought it
while you two were camping out in the mailbox.
Oh, man, I can't believe it's here.
Finally, the world-famous x-ray vision glasses.
This is gonna be great.
Whoa.
We got totally ripped off.
Ferb, let me see that comic again.
Oh, for crying out loud!
"Amazing illusion"?
"Fool your friends"?
"Does not actually provide x-ray vision."
Oh, man, this is a rip off.
Is just like that bodybuilding course we got last summer.
And I was so looking forward to looking through things.
Ferb. That's it.
I know what we're gonna do today.
Oh, my gosh! Aren't you the cutest thing ever?
Aw, you're so adorable!
I could just eat you up. Not literally, but you know what I mean.
Hey. Where's Perry?
Agent P., Doofenshmirtz is up to his usual shenanigans,
but we have a more serious problem.
There's a rogue agent on the loose
and he's in your area.
Carl is working with our field agents
to create a composite sketch.
Finished, sir.
Carl, you said you could draw.
I'm sorry, Agent P.
In the meanwhile, he may try to find
one of your secret passages and infiltrate your lair
where he can hack into our mainframe.
So be on the lookout for any suspicious characters.
D Perry d.
Look, Ferb, there's Perry.
Maybe that's where he disappears to all the time.
Well, if he got himself up there, he can get himself down.
Anyway, we've got the frames
and the polycarbonate lens solution,
now all we need is something that really improves eyesight.
Hey, I know.
Oh, Ferb, you're way ahead of me.
Agent P., we hired a professional artist
and got much better results.
We've identified the rogue agent as Dennis.
He's a mercenary for hire and a master of disguise.
You need to stop him at all costs.
First, I'm going to name you Mr. Cutie-Patootie.
Then we'll give you a complete makeover
and teach you some cool tricks.
You stay put while I find you a new stylish outfit.
Let's see what we've got here.
What am I doing with a scepter? Huh. Next.
Leopard headbands are so last year.
Ooh, here are some of my doll clothes.
Eh, let's skip the tiara. What is this? Leg warmers?
Who wears leg warmers? I definitely don't.
Mr. Cutie-Patootie, I finally found…
Get away from him!
I don't want your blandness to rub off.
Aw, poor Mr. Cutie-Patootie. Don't mind him.
Once I'm done making you over,
you're gonna be the new alpha pet.
I know! Matching shoes!
I found it. These shoes should complete the outfit.
Ah, Perry the Platypus.
How unexpected for you to burst in on my nefarious…
Nefarious…? No, that's… That's too much, even for me.
Perry the Platypus is due any second.
Hey, it's getting a little late. Where is he?
Oh, who needs him?
He never even does anything until after I tell him my plans.
He just stands there like a potted plant.
In fact…
Ah, Planty the Potted Plant. How unexpected.
I'd invite you to foil my latest scheme,
but I can see you're all tied up.
You see? I don't even need Perry the Platypus.
Mom's just back from the grocery store,
so we ought to have plenty of carrots for our x-ray glasses.
Thank you very much.
Oh, actually, Candace, we need those.
Oh, really? For your stupid x-ray glasses?
- Hey, they're not stu… - Do you know what this is?
Uh, is it not a rabbit?
This is an actual living creature that uses carrots
for food instead of science experiments.
- So why is he wearing a tutu? - He likes it!
Don't worry, Mr. Cutie-Patootie, they're just jealous.
Come on, maybe Isabella has some carrots.
OK, let's start with the simple tricks.
Sit.
Roll over.
Do the worm.
Now the robot.
Great! Wow, you must really like carrots.
What the…?
Oh. A bunny rabbit. Candace must have gotten a new pet.
Well, Planty the Potted Plant,
since you're just hanging around
let me demonstrate the brilliant evilocity
of my latest inven…
Grr. You see? See, that's what I'm talking about.
Ever since those condos next door started allowing pets,
it's been driving me bonkers.
All day and all night with the barking, barking, barking.
Oh, that is why I created my latest masterpiece of evil:
The giant dog-biscuit-inator.
Thank you! Thank you for making my point for me!
Now, I'll cover it with an irresistible gravy coating
and then it will take off and soar through town,
getting all the dogs to chase after it
until they follow it right off the edge of the Tri-State Area.
Well, Planty the Potted Plant, pretty clever, eh?
Don't give me that look.
Prepare to launch…
Hey, how did you do that? Ow, ow!
All right, come out in the open where I can… Ow.
Stomp harder, Ferb.
This carrot juice has gotta be really concentrated.
Hey, Phineas. What'cha doin'?
Just waiting for the concentrated carrot extract
to mix with the super-heated optical polymers.
Now I dip the frames into the x-ray vision solution.
It might take a couple hours to set properly.
Or just five minutes in my kwikkie-bake oven.
Fireside Girls are always prepared.
- Looks like they're ready. - Here goes nothing.
Hey, that sounds like it's coming from my house.
Mom, what's wrong?
I lost my wedding ring.
OK, Mom, what have you been doing since you last saw it?
Ah, I was fixing some lunch, then I washed the dishes.
Dishes, huh? This looks like a job for x-ray vision glasses.
I found it!
Ah, thank you, Phineas.
Uh, where is it?
Down in the drainpipe, under the sink.
We'll have it out for you in a jiff.
Quick, Ferb, we need a 14-inch pipe wrench a blowtorch, and a jar of mayonnaise.
That's very sweet of you, boys,
but I think I'll call my regular plumber.
He's bonded.
OK, suit yourself.
The glasses worked great!
This is gonna be fun.
D They say that beauty's just skin deep *
* But I got a brand-new perspective *
* Your skeleton is symmetrical *
* And your vascular system's effective *
* You can't keep secrets from me *
* 'Cause I can always see it With my x-ray eyes *
* I got a brand-new way Of looking at life *
* An altogether different Visual spectrum *
* Sometimes photons behave like a wave *
* But they're particles When you reflect them *
* But that don't bother me *
* 'Cause either way I see it With my x-ray eyes *
* Oh, with my x-ray eyes *
* Oh, with my x-ray eyes d.
Looks like our x-ray vision glasses
have passed all the quality-control tests.
Good thing, because we're stacking up
- quite a pile of orders. - Excellent.
It's time to order a big, ol' truckload of carrots.
Mr. Cutie-Patootie!
Where are you?
Mr. Cutie-Patootie!
Intruder alert. Intruder alert.
Hello, Agent P… No! Not you!
- Agent P., you have to stop him before h… - Access granted.
Yes, ma'am, you heard me right.
I need 3 metric tons of your highest grade carrots
delivered ASAP.
Why, yes. Yes, I am.
Have you seen Mr. Cutie-Patootie?
I can't find him anywhere.
Well, did you check the backyard?
He might be there.
Hm. How about the kitchen?
Well, Planty the Potted Plant,
you have proven yourself quite the adversary.
Why don't we just call this one a draw.
I'm kind of pooped.
Curse you, Planty the Potted Plant!
Good work, Agent P.
You don't suppose he could have run away?
Don't worry, I'm sure he'll turn up.
Hey, what happened to all the carrots?
One minute there's a backyard full of carrots,
I turn around for half a minute and poof!
- Now they're gone. - Welcome to my world.
Wow. That must be really annoying.
Oh, there you are, Perry.
At least you're still around.
Do you like wearing pink?
On behalf of the entire agency, I'd like to thank you
for you valiant service in one of our darkest hours.
Planty the Potted Plant, welcome to the agency.
Oh. My. Gosh.
I can't believe it, we're finally going to have our first…
Spa day!
Algae-infused, seaweed mud wrap.
Hot rock rub and volcanic mineral scrub.
- Sounds like fun. - Fun?
Yeah. Mud, seaweed, volcanic rock.
It's not fun, it's relaxing.
Which means it's enjoyable.
Which means it's fun.
Grown-up fun. You wouldn't understand.
Besides, Le Rub de Scrub Spa is very exclusive.
You can't even get in unless you know someone.
How are you guys getting in?
Well, I know Stacy.
And I know this neighbor who knows this hair washer,
who knows this bank teller, who knows this back waxer, who works at the spa.
Yeah, and I know Stacy.
Huh. Well, Ferb and I just aren't connected like you guys.
Come on, let's get going.
- Hi, guys. Where you going? - We're going to the spa.
Yeah, we're gonna get totally immersed in self-indulgence.
- And mud. - Sounds like fun.
See? I told you it was fun.
Hi, Phineas. What'cha doin'?
Well, I think we're gonna build a spa.
What do you say, Ferb?
It'll give you a chance to do your seaweed rap. You know:
Huah!
OK.
D Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated d.
Bill, bills, bills…
Ooh, half off at Slushy Burger.
Keepers.
Aw, what a little cutie!
What's a cute little love bug like you
doing out here all by yourself?
I'll call you Mr. Fluffy Pants,
because you're fluffy and you look like you're wearing pants.
Plus, you remind me of my Uncle Fluffy Pants.
So what do you think?
Soak, steam, sauna, then shower?
Or shower, steam, soak then sauna?
Hey, Candace.
- Hi, Yum-emy. Uh, I mean… - Hi, Jeremy.
I'm on my way to build houses for charity.
You girls want to come with?
Oh, we can't because we're going to the… Ow!
Oh, wow, philanthropy.
But what about the… Ow!
Uh, it's OK, Candace, if you guys are too busy.
Hey, what was that all about?
Uh, please hold.
Look, I don't want him knowing about the whole spa thing.
He'll think all I care about is myself.
- Candace. - Uno momento, por favor.
Look, we'll go "help people" for, like, 15 minutes
- and then we'll go to the spa. - Candace.
Your call is very important to us
and will be answered in the order received.
We'll still be able to make it to our spa day.
Candace, if you'd rather have a spa day…
You heard spa day?
Because I said "hurrah day."
Like, "Hurrah, I can't wait to build houses."
That's what we're doing, right?
Salt scrub. Nice, nice.
Milk bath. Good.
Hey, where's Buford with the seaweed?
Hey, Ferb, the volcanic rock is here.
Yeah, you're going to want to let this cool down a bit before you use it.
Aw, he's such a cute little kitty.
That's right. That's right. He loves his tuna fish.
Yes, you eat that
and I'll be over here working on my latest project.
I'm painting.
Ah, I see you found my blueprints.
You like those? You like…?
No! Not my blueprints!
No!
Oh, no. What are you doing?
I worked all…
Not, the gloominator!
No, no! Get off, get off!
Wow. I hope it doesn't rain on us.
Anyway, I want to thank you all for volunteering today.
Now, if I could have you two on dry-wall duty.
And, you, you're on baseboard duty.
And I could use you on conduit duty.
- Let's go! - Oh, sorry, girls.
I've got you two earmarked for nail duty.
Yay!
And that doesn't mean manicures.
- Aw. - Aw.
Don't worry, Ferb.
Your secret's safe with me.
Don't we have one more truck coming?
Excuse me, we have a delivery for Phineas Flynn.
That's me.
We've got 18 cases of cucumbers right here.
Say, aren't you a little young to order all this?
Yes, yes, he is.
Sorry, Phineas, he's new.
No problem, welcome to the job.
Hey, where's Perry?
Say, Carl, have you seen my parachute pants?
- Yes, they're very nice, sir. - That's not what I meant.
I know, sir, I was making a joke.
Oh! That's… Of course. That's very funny.
- Thank you, sir. - So where are they?
I'll go get them.
Agent P, you're… you're here!
Ahem. The Tri-State Area is mired in gloom
and we believe Doofenshmirtz is behind it.
We thought he retired the gloominator,
so this one is a big question mark.
I'm sure you'll know what to do, Agent P.
So, Carl, how are we doing on those pants?
Did you want the ones with the triangles
or the imitation paint splatters.
Triangles. And make it snappy.
I got the urge to pop and lock.
Let's hurry up so we don't miss our appointment.
- Oh, hey, Jeremy. - How's it going, girls?
Oh, you know, we're just over here helping
and being all buildery and stuff.
Cool beans. I'll let you get back to it.
Yeah, cool beans.
- Cool legumes. - Ow!
OK, we'll just finish this wall
and then we'll still be able to make it to the…
Oh, hi, Jeremy.
He's so dreamy. See what I mean?
No! No, don't touch the…
Oh, get away from that, you bad, bad kitty.
No, not the erasinator.
Not the biggerinator.
No! Look what you did to the moon. It's huge.
It's a… It's a… It's actually kinda pretty.
Perry the Platypus?
No, no. You don't think I did all this, I…
It wasn't me, I tell you. It was Mr. Fluffy Pants.
I call him Mr. Fluffy Pants.
You know, he's fluffy, looks like he's got pants.
Plus, he reminds me of my Uncle Fluffy Pants.
Who never actually wore any pants.
Come to think of it, I don't know why we called him that. Hm…
Anyway, I just love giving people nicknames.
For instance, you're Mr. Duck-Bill Face.
And Major Monogram, I call him "Monobrow."
Ha-ha. That's a good one,
you know, because he's… He's got the one, you know…?
And his little friend, the intern, is Doctor Coconut.
Yeah…
Sometimes I wish I didn't know so much.
Oh, Stacy, don't you just love
how Jeremy buckles his tool belt on the third loop?
Me too.
We're so gonna get married some day.
Did I tell you what we're gonna name our kids?
- Xavier and Amanda. - That's it.
Our appointment's in five minutes, I'm going with or without you.
Oh, are you leaving?
I was kinda hoping that maybe you could help me
with a teensy-weensy little task.
I need that slab of concrete turned into rubble by sundown.
You don't mind, right? I mean,
after all, it is for the less fortunate.
Thanks, I knew I could count on you.
Hey, Candace.
I just finished my side of the house and I'm heading home.
It was nice hanging out with you all day.
Bye, Jeremy.
It was nice hanging out with you too.
All day.
Did you hear that? We hung out all day.
Ah, help me!
I'm coming! Stacy!
Out of the way!
I'm sorry we had to clean up everything we destroyed
and had to rebuild it,
I'm especially sorry I made us miss our spa appointment,
but most of all, I'm sorry for being a bad friend.
I was just trying to impress Jeremy
- and I lost sight of… - OK, you can stop that right now.
You're starting to sound like one of those TV shows we like to make fun of.
- But, Stacy… - Look, the way I see it,
you prevented me from going to the spa,
almost killed me with a jackhammer,
dropped a wall on me, I've got gypsum in my hair,
and basically wasted my whole day,
but you did it for love, so it's OK.
Really?
Yeah, remember that time in the third grade?
You mean when you glued that hamster to my hair
just to impress Billy Clark?
Yeah. It's like that.
Billy Clark.
So I guess we're even.
- Oh. - My.
Gosh.
It's not plugged in.
Hey, sis.
Wow, you seem pretty wiped out.
Looks like you two could use a spa day.
A backyard spa?
You guys are so bust…
Yeah, that sounds great.
D It's spa day *
* A day to unwind *
* We'll walk on your spine *
* We'll be kind *
* It's spa day P and F on the scene *
* Gonna slather you with butter Make you feel like a queen *
* Get you sittin' in a hot tub d d Loungin' *
* You thinkin' this place is d d Astoundin' *
* Hot steam, hot stones, Hot water, hot back *
* We're poppin' cool new-age music Can't help but relax *
* It's a spa day d d Yeah *
* Shiatsu d d The good type *
* Thank you very much *
* We got a salt scrub, a mud tub *
* What's it gonna be? *
* A foot bath, a facial, aromatherapy *
* Yeah *
* Aromatherapy *
* It's spa day d d Yeah *
* Shiatsu *
* Where you from? D d Pennsylvania Dutch *
* Get the cucumber water And a big slice of lime *
* Throw your clock away You're on P and F time *
* It's a spa day d.
Well, you two are our last customers.
We're gonna go ahead and close up,
but you're welcome to stay as long as you like.
Wait, I keep telling you, it's not me, it's him.
Look over there. Look.
Candace? Stacy?
- What are you doing? - We're enjoying the spa.
- What spa? - Well, Phineas and Ferb…
The spa's gone, isn't it?
What does that even mean?
Ah. Never mind.
See? See, I told you it wasn't me.
No! Mr. Fluffy Pants!
Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
Oh, that was close, Mr. Fluffy Pants.
You almost…
You know, I think you're more trouble than you're worth.
D Perry d.
Aw, he seems OK.
- He seems so lovey-dovey. - My cat!
I've been looking all over for him.
Ah, I'm going to have to do the right thing here, aren't I?
Fine. Here you go.
Don't you people have jobs?
D Doctor Coconut look out *
* Here he comes *
* Doctor Coconut *
* Look out *
* Here he comes *
* Doctor Coconut *