* Like maybe *
* Building a rocket or fighting a mummy *
* Or climbing up the Eiffel Tower *
* Discovering something That doesn't exist d.
Hey!
D Or giving a monkey a shower *
* Surfing tidal waves *
* Creating nano-bots Or locating Frankenstein's brain d.
It's over here!
D Finding a Dodo bird *
* Painting a continent *
* Or driving our sister insane *
Phineas!
D As you can see There's a whole lot of stuff to do *
* Before school starts this fall d.
Come on, Perry!
D So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb Are gonna do it all! *
* So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb Are gonna do it all! d.
Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!
I'm coming as fast as I can, Candace!
I'm at your house!
What kind of emergency are we dealing with?
A parent emergency? A Phineas and Ferb emergency?
Oh, my.
A hair emergency. The worst kind.
This is awful. How did…
Wait! What are these four long strands?
And look at the shaved area. What's that all about?
Is this a rolled-up sock?
Candace, who did this to you?
Stacy, I did it to myself!
Why?
Jeremy's mom is hosting a benefit
for endangered animals this afternoon,
and I wanted a new look!
So you want your hair to look like an endangered species?
No! There are all these hairdo how-to videos online.
They make it look so easy!
Just brush it out, toss your head back, and voila!
It's simplicious!
It's not simplicious! It's hard-plicious!
Candace, take it easy.
Look at me! A tragic victim of internet hairstylists!
Sorry. I don't think there's anything I can do,
but there are a couple of guys who could…
No. No way.
Uh, are these chopsticks?
All right.
Phineas and Ferb!
What do you think?
We've been working on our spit-takes all morning!
Yeah. Yeah, you're hilarious.
Listen, I need you two to get me out of this situation.
Why? Your hair looks simplicious!
Have you tried tossing your head back?
Look, I don't have time to explain.
Just get me back to the way I was.
OK. But I think you're making a mistake.
Hey, where's Perry?
What? I'm like the only person who's never said it.
Good afternoon, Agent P.
For the past few days,
our motion sensors have detected Dr. Doofenshmirtz
rummaging around in his basement.
So, last night, we had Carl staked out down there
behind his water heater.
It was horrible down there!
- Carl! - I saw a rat give birth
to a snail!
Just tell him about Doofenshmirtz!
Doofenshmirtz kept coming down
and grabbing pieces of his old inators from cardboard boxes.
Oh, no!
Brown recluse spiders favor dwelling in cardboard.
Get it off! Get it off!
Get out there and find out what Doof is up to.
I can feel its little hairy arms.
Seriously, Carl. What a baby!
I think it laid eggs in my ear!
So by combining ultraviolet and infrared waves
together with follicle stimulation properties,
not only does it style your hair,
but it stimulates and accelerates new hair growth.
So that should take care of that little shaved area.
What's that all about?
Don't get me started.
All you have to do is sit there for 30 minutes on setting five,
and you're good to go!
Yeah, yeah. Tick, tock.
Start her up, Ferb.
Remember, 30 minutes on setting five.
Thanks, guys.
What was that?
Oh, I changed my ringtone.
That's a tangerine orangutan. Endangered animals.
Oh, it's Jeremy!
Hi! You're, uh, picking me up in 10 minutes?
Great! Bye! 10 minutes!
Stacy, crank this thing up!
If it takes a half an hour on five,
it should do the trick in 10 seconds on 20.
I don't know, Candace. Maybe you shouldn't mess with…
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it'll be fine.
OK.
Besides, Stacy, they wouldn't put a 20 on it,
if it weren't meant to be used, right?
Well, I guess so.
Oh! My 10 seconds are up!
Well? How's it look?
I can't believe it! It's perfect!
Told ya it'd be fine.
Oh, now, help me find something cute to wear.
Ah, Perry the Platypus,
I don't like your tone!
Behold, I give you
the Very, Very Bad-inator!
It's made up of only the most evil parts of my old inators,
cobbled together without any rhyme or reason.
My plan is to load it on my floating platform,
take it high above the Tri-state area,
and, you know, turn it on and see what it does.
I have no idea, but, uh, I'm sure it's gonna be bad.
Hence "Very-Bad-inator."
Oh, I got a chill.
- Wow! Nice turnout! - Yeah!
Hey, there's your mom.
There you two are!
Don't you look nice, Candace!
Oh! Thanks, Mrs. Johnson!
Come on, I'll show you where we're sitting.
We have a very good turnout this year.
Many of Danville's top zoologists are here.
I bet I'll have more species named after me than you do.
- Care to make a wager? - No!
Why not?
Because your last name is Pithicus!
The money that this banquet raises
will go a long way to facilitate solutions
for the problems these poor animals face.
Great!
Uh, Candace? I think you've got a little food or something on your lip.
Will you excuse me for a moment?
Uh, I just needed this spoon for a…
Phineas!
Oh, hi, Candace! It's Candace.
You turned it up to 20? So what happened?
No way! That is so cool!
OK, I'll see what we can do.
Mom, may Ferb and I be excused?
Candace needs help with her hair.
So you guys are hair stylists now?
Apparently.
So what would you do with my hair?
Nothing. It's perfect the way it is.
Wow, you are good.
Girlfriend, please.
Be careful, Perry the Platypus.
You're awfully close to the edge.
Oh, let me help you back.
Oh, I can't quite… Whoops! I'm just messing with you.
Candace?
Candace? Now where'd she go?
I gotta find a better place to hide.
Oh, stop it.
You've lost your joie de vivre.
Wow, this thing keeps getting weirder every year.
"It is wonderful to see such a fine turnout…"
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to tonight's lecture.
Where did she go?
Won't you all please help welcome…
Oh, no!
Professor Herbert Fonzworth Weatherman Jones!
Huh?
That's not Professor Herbert Fonzworth Weatherman Jones.
That's the rare tangerine orangutan!
We have to capture it and return it to the wild.
Stand back, everyone! I have an associate's degree in zoology.
I got this.
Oh, no! Jeremy's mother! She can't see me like this!
Come back! Don't run away!
I mean you no harm!
No, no, no, don't go up there!
Don't go on the roof! Oh.
Jeremy, honey, would you do me a favor
and call Animal Control, please?
Sure thing, Mom.
Hey, Ferb, look up there! That's Candace on the roof!
And I was worried this function would be dull.
Phineas, help! Jeremy's mom thinks I'm an orangutan,
and is trying to return me to the wild!
OK, hang tight. We brought the hair remover.
This looks like a good spot to fire up the Really Bad-inator.
I can't wait to see what it does.
Guess we'll have to wait.
Oh, I brought snacks!
Let me see what I have here.
I brought some baby carrots, and some grapes,
and, oh, peanut butter!
Oh, and some honey.
See, Perry the Platypus, most people like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,
but I really prefer peanut butter and honey.
Very few people know that Myron's Discus Thrower
was built with real ancient disc-throwing action.
Hang on, Ferb.
Whee!
Candace? Ferb and I made a sonic oscillator.
This baby'll blow the fuzz off a peach at 90 yards.
Great, get this hair off of me!
Whoo-hoo? Hello? Little friend? Where did you go?
Come on, Ferb.
I see you!
Animal Control. You got a monkey needs tranquilizing?
That is not a monkey. It's the very rare tangerine orangutan.
Yeah, to-may-to, po-tah-to.
Just leave it to the professionals!
Huh! Would you look at that?
You've probably noticed, I'm, uh, not that good at my job.
So you can just take this, and I'll be right back.
Oh, yes, peanut butter and honey sandwiches!
The trick is the honey.
And you get to use one of these weird honey spoony-things!
Perry the Platypus! Did you just say "gunga-linga-dung"?
Oh, great! Now I'm all sticky!
Oh, now this was my last clean lab coat, too!
Oh, it's on now, pal…
Hey! Hey, hey, hey, what are you doing?
Oh, I get it.
Payback. Very funny, Perry the Platypus.
Very mature.
"Thank you for purchasing the Hanson 3,000."
"Family-Friendly Tranqui-Dart Air Contrast Delivery System."
"There are many like it, but this one is yours."
Phineas, hurry while she's distracted!
All right, Candace!
Hey, it worked!
As soon as I get this honey off of me…
Whoa!
Is this hair?
Oh, no! Now I'll never know what the Bad-inator does!
Curse you, Perry the Platypus!
"The red plunger will act as a non-return valve"
"and retain the air within the dart."
Fear not, helpless primate!
Bright banquets of the Elysian vale
will soon melt every care away,
or my name isn't Hawkeye Johnson!
Shot in the butt while covered in honey and hair.
What do you know, my horoscope was right!
My beautiful, beautiful horoscope…
Oh, no! What have I done?
She's going to fall.
Hold the door, Barbara, I think this is our floor.
Thanks, guys! I could just hug you!
Awesome!
Candace? You caught her!
You saved this orangutan!
I'll take it from here.
Leave it to the professionals.
Mama, I'm pretty!
I knew you were a good catch!
Thanks, Mrs. Johnson.
I didn't know you were helping out my mom.
You made quite an impression on her.
Well, I guess you could say
I'm having a good bad hair day.
D I'm blurry and drowsy But balladry beckons *
* Though I'll probably lose consciousness In 17 seconds *
* Don't know my location I'm not sure that I care *
* But I think I'm in a jungle And I'm covered in hair *
* If you want to know why Please refer to the chart *
* I've been shot in the butt with a dart *
* I've been shot in the… d.
So, you and Stacy are going to a Rock and Roll memorabilia auction?
Well, yeah. They're going to be auctioning off
one of the original Tiny Cowboy bobble heads,
the "Lefty" one.
So, I guess I won't be seeing you at the Annual Danville Meatloaf Festival.
No. What's a meatloaf festival?
Oh, that's right, you were away at camp last summer
when I won this!
Meatloaf Queen?
Wow, that's pretty fancy.
And because my meatloaf was voted best at the festival last year,
I have the honor of being one of the judges this year.
So you have the honor of eating other people's meatloaf all day?
Yeah. I'm living the dream.
What happened?
We were just at the bounce house
down at the Meatloaf Festival and…
And I was there, you know, having a good time, and suddenly…
Later!
Dude! Gotta go!
And even though it was funny,
I still kind of wish that the bounce house was still there.
You know, for the little kids.
- Buford's right. - I am?
Even though they're made for little kids,
there's something about a bounce house that you can't resist.
What if bounce houses were made for bigger kids?
Hey!
Slightly bigger kids.
And what if they just happened to be totally amazing?
I stand before you today, and I hereby declare that… that…
Uh, little help, Ferb?
That nobody has yet done justice to the bounce house concept.
And that it is up to us to show the world
what a bounce house can truly be!
For if not us, then who?
If not now, when?
And if not when, then… something else!
Gentlemen, I know what we're gonna do today!
But first, answer me this.
Where's Perry?
No, seriously, where is he?
I don't… I haven't seen him.
Good morning, Agent P. We've recently found surveillance footage
of Doofenshmirtz buying fresh produce.
We've concluded there are two possibilities.
Either he's up to something sinister that is food related,
or he's cooking dinner 'cause he's got a beautiful woman coming over
and he wants to imp…
Never mind. It's obviously the first thing.
Very impressive.
Just a little bit more, Ferb.
That's about right.
Wow. Jamie Oliver.
I can't believe we've got one of England's most famous chefs
for our little meatloaf festival.
Brilliant! It's a pleasure to be here.
Yes. This year we've expanded our venue.
We have 29 varieties of meatloaf flavored ice-cream,
as well as various meatloaf themed attractions and rides.
So, what exactly is meatloaf?
Oh, it's made of meat, it's got bread and onions.
Ah! So it's a beverage.
Well, no. But it's sort of like shepherd's pie,
except there's no potatoes or vegetables in it.
You know, in the shape of a loaf.
You put pepper in it?
If you want.
Oh! Meatloaf!
Welcome, Perry the Platypus!
I never thought you'd fall for the old
"distract Perry the Platypus with a weird bird" trap.
I gotta say though, it's quite an ugly bird.
And now, for something a little more confining.
You like it? It's biodegradable.
A biodegradable trap.
You know how everyone says,
"If you don't like meatloaf, it's probably because you haven't tasted my meatloaf?"
Well, it's true, because mine really is the best!
In fact, I come from a long line of great meatloaf chefs.
The recipe was first created by my great, great grandmother Gretel Doofenshmirtz,
who passed it down to my grandpa, Jose Doofenshmirtz.
Weird story there.
Then he passed it down to my mom,
who passed it down to… Roger. Ugh!
Naturally, I had to steal it from him.
And when I did, I finally found out what the secret ingredient was.
The secret ingredient was hate.
Usually it's love, but Great Grandma Gretel had some issues.
With this recipe, I'm sure to win the Danville Meatloaf Festival.
But just in case, I have the Rotten-inator!
With a quick blast of this, my competitors' meatloves'
will be completely rotten!
My victory is guaranteed!
Oh, man! This is awesome.
And that's not the half of it.
We're gonna fill it with helium.
Hey, Buford, we are going to float like little woodland pixies.
You're never gonna let me live that down, are you?
OK, everybody, let's bounce.
Whee!
The next item up for bid is this lovely Mona Lisa reproduction
made entirely out of recycled guitar picks
from the Paisley Sideburn Brothers.
Shall we start the bidding at $10?
Um, excuse me.
May I borrow these for a moment?
Thank you.
Phineas and Ferb!
Stacy, I'm going to skip over my dramatic agonizing
about whether I can resist the urge to bust my brothers,
and I'm just going to give you my $70, my auction paddle,
and tell you to do the best you can to get that bobblehead.
Oh, here.
Thank you.
Seriously, who brings opera glasses to an auction?
I'm at an auction?
Talk to me, Stacy! How are we doing?
OK, Candace, this is all the money you gave me,
so this is my final bid.
$70. Do I hear 75?
$70 going once. 70 going twice.
Oh, wait, we got 75
- from the weird guy in the back. - No!
Stacy, I found 37 cents. Raise the bid.
Hello? Oh, stupid non-waterproof cell phones!
And with this garnish, I leave nothing to chance.
The meatloaf is complete.
Oh, there's the judges.
I better zap that guy's meatloaf.
I rotted the trap?
Oh! I should've never made that out of biodegradable materials!
Stupid Mother Earth!
For that I'll turn you rotten.
Then perhaps you'll stop annoying me!
Fresh cucumbers.
Fresh pickles.
This novel is so riveting.
Oh, what a rotten ending.
Here's some refreshing milk.
Eww! It's curdled!
Well, I can fix that.
Here's a spoon.
Hey, we're over the Meatloaf Festival!
Anybody else hungry?
I don't know. It still needs something.
It needs paprika.
Well, how much?
Time to eat.
Buford's pulling us down.
How is that possible?
He weighs no more down there than he did up here.
It's probably best not to question.
Oh, boy, meatloaf on a stick? Let's go.
You guys go ahead. I'll catch up with you.
OK. See you in a few.
Buford, what are you up to?
I got something I need to do.
Hey, shrimplets, I've got something for you.
Hey, aren't you getting tired of this? Hold still!
Oh, no! My meatloaf!
You know, I've noticed how often my inators hit things
that I never intended them to hit?
It's quite often…
Perry the Platypus, give me that back.
Ah! Oh, and you had to put it on puree, didn't you?
Curse you, Perry the Platypus!
All right, Jamie, how about this booth?
Ugh! Eww!
This is rancid!
I can't believe I'm saying this,
but some kind of preservatives
in this meatloaf would have been a blessing.
Wait a minute. Disqualified? Oh!
It can't possibly be that bad. Let me try it.
Mmm-mmm.
Yes, someone's gonna have to
call the paramedics, I think.
Buford, I have never seen this side of you before.
I am very proud.
Yeah.
I retract my former statement.
Shall we be going?
Get him!
Hi, Candace. Eww! What have you got all over you?
A late entry.
OK, Mom, I've been dragged all over town
by Phineas and Ferb's Mega Bounce House,
which you'll probably never see,
but the worst part is I didn't even get my Tiny Cowboy bobblehead.
What you need is some award winning meatloaf.
This is Nigel and Adrian.
They're this year's Meatloaf Kings.
Nigel and Adrian. You're Tiny Cowboy.
What are you doing here?
Well, isn't it obvious? We're here for the meatloaf.
Music is great and all, but our one true passion is meatloaf.
Wait, Nigel and Adrian are…? Are you sure?
They're not tiny.
And come on, they're not even cowboys.
Mom, you're embarrassing me.
Candace, could we interest you in some of the world's greatest meatloaf?
Oh, don't mind if I do! Is it vegetarian?
It's got "meat" actually, in the name.
Just kidding.
D Ground beef and breadcrumbs *
* Some onions and an egg *
* My mouth is watering So please don't make me beg *
* I know everybody's got their taste And that's just fine *
* But if you say that you don't like it *
* Then you've never tasted mine *
* I'm talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf *
* So moist and savory It's beef That's shaped like bread *
* Don't know what that aroma Is doing in my head *
* Whatever we don't eat We'll discreetly put away *
* But never fear, my meatloaf We'll meet again someday *
* I'm talking about meatloaf *
* I'm a meatloaf lover *
* I'll tell you, brother, yeah *
* Don't need no other *
* Talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, meatloaf lover *
* won't you from the inside Like it's made by your mother *
* Talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, yeah *
* We're talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, yeah *
* We're talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, yeah *
I really shouldn't have eaten that…
Wait, is that Tiny Cowboy.
D I'm talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, meatloaf lover *
* won't you from the inside Like it's made by your mother *
* Talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, yeah *
* We're talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, yeah *
* We're talking about meatloaf *
* Meatloaf, yeah *
* Yeah *