D There's a hundred And four days of summer vacation *
* And school comes along just to end it *
* So the annual problem For our generation *
* Is finding a good way to spend it *
* Like maybe *
* Building a rocket or fighting a mummy *
* Or climbing up the Eiffel Tower *
* Discovering something That doesn't exist d.
Hey!
D Or giving a monkey a shower *
* Surfing tidal waves *
* Creating nano-bots Or locating Frankenstein's brain d.
It's over here!
D Finding a Dodo bird *
* Painting a continent *
* Or driving our sister insane *
Phineas!
D As you can see There's a whole lot of stuff to do *
* Before school starts this fall d.
Come on, Perry!
D So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb Are gonna do it all! *
* So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb Are gonna do it all! d.
Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!
It's coming!
We're doomed!
The prophecy has come true!
We are about to pay for our over-consumption!
You created me! Garbagezilla!
And now, puny humans, prepare to be trashed. Oh! Oh!
Knock it off!
Candace, I don't know what you kids are doing,
but I'm taking an online knitting test in a few minutes
and I need it to be quiet around here.
You might not remember quiet.
I'm not sure you two have ever met.
Anyway I'm putting you on noise patrol.
You're in charge.
I'm in charge? Whoo-hoo! Yeah!
Use a muffler.
Oh, yeah. Whoo-hoo.
This time I want an air siren and tap shoes.
Phineas, Ferb,
mom put me on noise patrol while she's taking an online test.
She needs it to be absolutely quiet!
Candace! I'm trying to concentrate!
Now, let's see.
"What's the first ingredient in knitting a garment?"
Oh, I know that. It's love.
What do you mean "wool"?
You heard her, right? No noise.
I want you silent and invisible. Got it?
Silent and invisible? What am I, a ninja?
That's it! Gang, I know what we're gonna do today.
Speaking of silent and invisible, where's Perry?
Agent P, we have a crisis!
The Agency was going through Dr. Doofenshmirtz's trash this week
when we found this defaced magazine cover.
Shameful!
There were hundreds of similarly defaced photos
of good looking men, including this handsome devil gracing
the cover of Covert Lifestyles.
My interest in this incident is purely professional,
but put a stop to it!
D Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah Perry! d.
Why? Why!
D Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated d.
Hold on, Perry the Platypus,
I'm just getting the mail.
Oh, goody! It's my order from the Power Tool and Skeleton Key Warehouse.
I was wondering when this was gonna…
Look at this!
Every week the mailman makes the same mistake
and I end up getting my neighbor's HS Weekly.
Here, hold this, Perry the Platypus, I need to rant.
I hate all these good-looking models
on the cover of Handsome and Symmetrical magazine,
mocking me with their manly perfection.
Their perfect hair, their perfect skin, I hate it!
And this is why I created the De-Handsome-inator!
Soon all these good-looking faces will be hideous!
Ow!
Wait, did you use the skeleton key or was it the power tools?
Just for that I'm not gonna tell you why the apple…
Argh! You know, I don't have the energy for this.
It's still early. Do you wanna go grab some lunch?
Come on. I skipped breakfast this morning.
You like eggs?
OK, gang, Ferb and I made these ninja outfits
using smart garment technology.
Once they're switched on, the outfits are designed
to hide the wearer from anyone who's not wearing the suit.
Hey, hey, hey!
I smell noise. Is that what the black pajamas are for?
You gonna have a noise party?
Actually, it's the opposite. We're ninjas.
Ninjas are renowned for their quiet and concealment.
We made an outfit for you, too.
You should put it on. Take it from me.
- Black is slimming. - No, thanks.
That's OK. We'll leave it here for you in case you change your mind.
All right, ninjas. Let's turn on our outfits.
Hey! Where'd everyone go? That's so weird.
Huh. Oh, I'll find them.
That was cool! I didn't have to do anything.
The outfit did all the work.
Whoa, Phineas, which way are you facing?
Good question. Left.
Stupid stealthy ninjas!
Candace, keep it down!
"What do you call a clever knitter?"
I know! A knit wit!
Is there anything better than knitting humor?
I need to stop at the bank. I don't have any cash.
It's an honor, sir! A real honor!
I can't wait to tell my wife!
Oh, are you famous? You look like a model. Are you an actor?
You go first. I can wait.
Please. I'm just getting some cash to buy medicine for my kids.
Yes, uh, hello.
I just need to make a withdrawal from my account, please.
Here. Take this. It's on us.
No, no. Just enough for lunch.
- Sparkling cider? - Scrambled eggs?
That's real lobster in there.
Preserve the moment!
Can you believe the service in this place, Perry the Platypus?
Here you go. All framed.
Ah, thank you.
See, this isn't me.
This is just the superhumanly attractive male model that came with the frame.
I mean, really, look at this guy, right?
That's funny, he's wearing a lab coat just like me…
Oh, this is horrible! I can't be handsome!
It's everything I despise!
Don't you understand? Beautiful people,
they just get everything they want in the world.
I mean, watch this. Hey, lady, nice baby.
You want 'em? He likes you better.
No, I don't want your baby.
You see, Perry the Platypus,
the unfair advantage good-looking people have?
Hey!
If I ran for Mayor, would you vote for me?
Over and over again.
No, elections are for ugly people.
I'm sure they'd just give him the mayorship.
You think?
Sure, you've already got a sizeable mob
and I bet we could pick up a couple thousand more on the way.
Well, OK then. On to City Hall.
My busting sense is tingling.
There's something Phineas and Ferb going on here.
Phineas? Ferb?
You in here?
Phineas? Ferb? Phineas? Phineas!
I know you're here!
And the whole tri-state area knows you're here, Candace.
Again, could you please keep it down?
I tried to tell you before.
Ah-ha! Uh, uh…
You'll never be able to see us unless you wear a ninja outfit yourself.
Oh, I'll wear a ninja outfit all right.
Then I'll bust the whole lot of you.
D My jaw is rugged, my hair is wavy *
* My eyes, they twinkle and shine *
* I used to be mashed potatoes, Now I'm the gravy *
* Nobody else is quite this fine *
* I'm the face, I'm a real ace *
* Nobody's visual appeal is stronger *
* I'm the very definition Of masculine grace *
* Take a picture, it'll last you longer *
* 'Cause I'm handsome I'm so good-looking *
* I'm easy on the eyes *
* Don't you know that I'm handsome? *
* I got chiseled features *
* Try not to look surprised *
* When you see that I'm handsome *
* I'm a real Adonis I'm the best you ever saw *
* I'm handsome I'm a tall drink of water *
* Somebody better grab a straw *
* 'Cause I'm handsome d.
My company wants to give you a lifetime supply
- of our distinctive hand mirrors. - Send them over.
D Don't you know that I'm handsome? *
I'm gonna name all my children after you even though they're already in college.
Nice!
D Can't you see that I'm handsome? *
* Handsome He's handsome *
* Get in line, ladies *
* 'Cause I'm handsome *
* I'm a total catch, really *
* I'm quite fetching *
* It's a word It is *
* It means that I'm handsome d.
Well, well, well, Heinz.
At the age of 47 you've finally grown into your looks.
Yes. Yes, I have.
In fact, it would be our pleasure to suspend democracy
and make you our Supreme Leader.
Do you have any questions, you handsome devil?
Hmm, how's my hair?
He's handsome and funny!
This will be the perfect place to watch the coronation.
I can't believe how fast they mass produced
these commemorative hot air balloons.
Hand mirror delivery.
Phineas, come out, come out, wherever you are.
OK, you guys are so busted.
And I have the evidence right here on my body.
Whoo-hoo! Mom! Mom!
I knew she'd come back for the slimming.
OK, I know you're super busy and all,
but you have just got to see what Phineas and Ferb made.
I'm wearing it.
Candace, this test is time sensitive.
- Just one second. - Oh, all right.
What? Where'd you go?
I'm right here. On the ceiling.
- What? - I'm right here. Under the rug.
- Young lady! - Now I'm on the shelf.
I don't know how you're throwing your voice
and I understand that you want attention, but I'm really, really busy.
It's the outfit! It won't let you see me.
But it apparently has no qualms about letting me hear you.
Mom, here it is. Mom!
All right, Candace.
What am I looking at?
These outfits were fun.
I've never moved so fast.
Oh! That was quite a work out.
Hey! It's Candace's ninja outfit.
It's hiding. She must've left it switched on.
And now, I finally pronounce you…
Oh, Perry the Platypus, I'm so glad you're here to see this.
What's that? My inator remote?
You're wasting your time.
There's no way you'll get a clear line of fire from my place to here,
what with all those commemorative hot air balloons in the way.
How do they mass produce those so fast?
Ew.
He suddenly looks so unqualified.
Please disperse. Nothing handsome to see here.
Hey, let's go look at fashion magazines.
Yeah, that sounds great.
And they fold down to almost nothing.
Phineas, do not go anywhere!
The ninja outfits, they're still there!
Hurry! Wait till you see this!
By pressing the "on" button the outfits put themselves away.
- There! Bust them! - Oh, hi, kids.
I wanna thank you for being so quiet all afternoon.
Unlike someone I know.
But, but, but…
Hey, Mom. How'd your test go?
Well, lucky for Candace, I just passed.
- Anyone for pie? - Me!
Mush, Candace.
So sorry.
It looks like your small window of fleeting beauty is now gone.
I don't understand! How… how is it possible?
You did this, Perry the Platypus.
Coming, bro?
Did you ever notice that in a certain light Buford looks handsome?
It's a blessing and a curse.
Another week's allowance replacing wedgied underwear.
If I had anything left I would invest in the company.
Wedgie time!
Thanks for saving my place in line, nerd.
Buford, how did you find me?
Let's just say the initials are G, P and S.
Next.
A pack of Tuff Gum and this cheese grater.
- What is the cheese grater for? - You'll see.
Four eighty-six. Paper or plastic?
Plastic. Pay the man, propeller head.
That is it!
I can put up with noogies, wedgies, wet willies
and even the fact that you apparently placed
a tracking device on or inside my person.
But I will not tolerate your ignorant decision
to take plastic over paper!
From this moment on, I am no longer your nerd!
Fine!
I was feeling creatively stifled by you anyway!
And you! You just cost me a perfectly good nerd.
Maybe I'll make you my new nerd!
Wow, your pressure tactics are quite developed for a youngster.
Yes. Yes, they are.
But some people don't appreciate that!
You may be the most intimidating person
- I've ever met. - You better believe it!
You could probably bully the entire tri-state area.
I'm getting tingly!
Oh, free! I am so free!
Free to be me! It is me that is free!
Hey, Baljeet. You're just in time for what we wanna do today.
- Where's Buford? - Who cares?
I am finally free to live my own life!
I feel like I can do anything.
Like climb a mountain!
Great! Let's put that energy to work building our next…
No! I mean literally climb an actual mountain.
Danville Mountain!
Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!
Hey, where's Perry?
Morning, Agent P. We've just received some intel
that Doof has hired an assistant.
Some muscle, if you will.
He must be up to something big.
You know, I once put in a request
for some muscle. Got Carl.
And how many attacks since I came on board?
Well, none, but would it kill you to at least look the part?
You look like a preschool crossing guard.
No need to be hurtful, sir.
Good luck, Agent P.
D Agent P. *
I can see how helping you take over the tri-state area
would afford me many new bullying opportunities.
But what's with the back-story, dude?
I mean, who needs a special reason to boss people around?
I never thought of it like that!
We'll get started as soon as I pick up some fresh lab coats.
These have got scorch marks all over them.
Out of my way, mallet heads. Move it or never use it!
Wow, this kid's always on the clock!
Give Dr. Toothenhurtz here his lab coat, bright eyes.
I'm sorry, we have a line here. You might wanna use it.
And you might wanna rethink that.
I mean it would be a shame if this double Dutch
chocolate mocha espresso you've been drinking
were to, say, I don't know, splishy splash on all those
pristine white lab coats you got back there.
Hold me!
You wouldn't dare!
Try me.
Fine! Take your dry cleaning and go.
Who would've thought that after all these years,
all I needed to take over the tri-state area was
a grammar school goon?
A ham-handed half pint.
A knee-high ne'er-do-well.
A pint-sized palooka. A pushy prepubescent.
Are you done?
No, I got one more.
A pipsqueak pugilist.
OK, now I'm done.
There it is. Danville Mountain.
My quest lies ahead of me like an unpeeled potato.
We can help you skin that adventure spud.
May we present the MegaPants!
You see, these hydraulic pistons will walk…
No! I need to do this myself.
- And that means no inventions. - What?
No gadgets, no gimmicks, just pure achievement.
It will be great! Let us go!
No inventions? Are you guys gonna be OK?
Sure. Why wouldn't we be?
I don't know. That rope bridge looks a little rickety.
A couple of hydrofoil unicycles would…
Not necessary! Fear is for yesterday.
Today we live!
New Baljeet rocks!
Rocked.
He made it! Well, with the bridge gone,
we could probably use some spring-loaded boots.
Or a drilling machine, or, or…
I'll save you!
Who's ready for some free-climbing?
Me!
Dude, what's with the play set?
Play set? No, this is a non-scale model of the tri-state area.
So you play with dolls?
Maybe. But it also helps me visualize my scheme.
It doesn't have to be used with dolls all the time.
Anyway, this is our headquarters, larger for the sake of clarity.
And this, see this right here?
This is my Sculpt-inator. This part will scan my body
and this part will shoot a beam
which will then carve Danville Mountain into a life-like statue of me!
Visible for literally miles in every direction.
Not scale miles, real miles!
Then when people see the splendid tower of manliness,
they will just assume that I should be their leader. Look.
Look how it captures the manly thickness of my neck.
- That's you? - Yeah.
I think the cut of your lab coat is working against you.
I know, right? I've got to talk to my tailor about that.
Look, there's Baljeet's house! I'm gonna spit on it.
You know, I'm kind of surprised
we haven't had a visit from my nemesis yet.
I'm sure he'll be along. I can't wait to see the look on his face
when he gets a load of you!
Hey, Baljeet, you sure you don't need
any robotic suction spikes up there?
- Nope. - Or how about mechanical lobster claws?
Nope.
Or maybe gas-propelled pine cone grappling hooks.
Or cybernetically-controlled towing spiders.
I'm good!
Surprise! Matching outfits!
It's John Phillips of London Bullywear.
Plus, monogrammed jetpacks. Doof and Byoof.
We rhyme.
Gee, thanks a lot! Wait till my friends get a load of me!
Oh, you're not gonna need friends.
You're gonna be on top of the heap!
It's lonely at the top.
But, you know, it's the top, so it dulls the ache.
Yes! I have beat you, Danville Mountain!
In your cliff face!
I cannot wait to tell Bu…
Oh. That is right.
OK, that's enough triumph for one day. Are we done here, Baljeet?
- Yes. - Phineas, go!
Ice chalet!
If we hadn't been able to invent something soon.
I was going to scream.
D Somewhere out across that skyline *
* Maybe down some lonely street *
* There is a boy with anger issues *
* Without whom I am incomplete *
* Who will give me wedgies now? *
* Now that we're so far apart *
* I have got to get him back somehow *
* There's a bully-sized hole *
* A bully-sized hole *
* A bully-sized hole in my heart *
* Who will I give noogies to? *
* And tease for being so smart *
* I just don't know what to do *
* There's a nerd-shaped hole in my heart *
* There's a nerd-shaped hole *
* A bully-sized hole *
* A big honking hole in my heart d.
Wait a second! You're singing?
I know what that means! You're leaving, aren't you?
Sorry, Dr. Doothenasia.
But there comes a time when you don't wanna bully everyone.
You just wanna bully someone you love.
Nice kid. Well, back to the inator.
OK, we gotta melt out the inside!
You know, you really ought to pace yourself.
Mud room first. Ferb, start carving the bearskin rug.
You're gonna get the bends or something.
You're too late, Perry the Platypus!
Uh! Make sure to get my good side!
No! Perry the Platypus! Oh, you ruined it!
Where am I gonna get another mountain now?
Great job on this snow chalet, guys.
It's amazing how the cocoa stays hot in these double walled ice cups!
How are you feeling, Phineas?
Coming down now. Coming down.
I myself am so down, I am in the basement.
Buford!
As much as I'd like a tearful reunion,
- we gotta get off this mountain, pronto! - Why?
Let's just say, if you want a neck like mine,
you gotta start lifting young.
Before any of us move I have got one last thing to do.
There.
I feel much better, do not you?
Wow! I had no idea that was so uncomfortable.
I am so sorry.
It's been great sharing this bonding moment with you two,
but we need to get off this crumbling mountain now!
Grab hold of something!
- Do you ever get used to this? - Nope.
I am totally gonna wash my hands after this. Twice.
Who could've guessed it, it's back to normal.
And, explosion now…
Yep, just like that.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus.
Whatever.
D Perry d.
I am sorry for my outburst earlier.
No, I'm sorry for putting the GPS on you.
Consider it gone.
Oh, yes. This is much less humiliating.
Don't worry. I'll get the duct tape.
He meant for my pants, right?
D I just don't know what to do *
* There's a nerd-shaped hole in my heart *
* There's a nerd-shaped hole *
* A bully-sized hole *
* A big honking hole in my heart d.
Wait a second! You're singing?
I know what that means! You're leaving, aren't you?