1 00:00:00,031 --> 00:00:02,825 Pushing Daisies - Season 02 Episode 06 "Oh Oh Oh... It's Magic!" 2 00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:05,495 Subtitle (720p CTU v.1.00): A²S Team --==All-about-Subs.fr==-- 3 00:00:06,663 --> 00:00:09,577 At this very moment in the town of Coeur d'Coeurs, 4 00:00:09,607 --> 00:00:11,623 young Ned believed in magic. 5 00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:15,150 It was not the magic that sparked from his fingertip 6 00:00:15,180 --> 00:00:17,528 when he touched a dead thing alive again. 7 00:00:17,900 --> 00:00:20,885 That particular magic had not yet been discovered. 8 00:00:21,529 --> 00:00:24,400 This was the magic of a father's love. 9 00:00:27,648 --> 00:00:31,210 Young Ned would discover this magic was not magic at all. 10 00:00:31,747 --> 00:00:32,627 Alakazam! 11 00:00:33,081 --> 00:00:34,531 It was just a trick. 12 00:00:34,691 --> 00:00:38,415 After Ned's mother died, his father performed another trick... 13 00:00:38,957 --> 00:00:40,974 a cruel disappearing act. 14 00:00:41,501 --> 00:00:42,651 I'll be back. 15 00:00:43,340 --> 00:00:45,641 And when his father never came back, 16 00:00:46,072 --> 00:00:48,553 Ned stopped believing in magic. 17 00:00:49,218 --> 00:00:52,315 Young Ned discovered his father would one day perform 18 00:00:52,345 --> 00:00:54,586 his sleights of hand and misdirections 19 00:00:54,616 --> 00:00:57,578 for a younger, more impressionable audience, 20 00:00:57,608 --> 00:00:59,919 a new family that did not include Ned, 21 00:01:00,133 --> 00:01:03,673 but did include his half-brothers, Maurice and Ralston. 22 00:01:04,271 --> 00:01:08,466 Maurice and Ralston loved their father and delighted in his magical tricks 23 00:01:08,616 --> 00:01:11,285 and insisted on learning every one of them. 24 00:01:14,124 --> 00:01:16,929 But there was one magic trick their father never taught them 25 00:01:16,959 --> 00:01:19,009 and would only show them once... 26 00:01:19,184 --> 00:01:21,374 a cruel disappearing act. 27 00:01:22,181 --> 00:01:24,478 It's 19 years, 42 weeks, 28 00:01:24,508 --> 00:01:27,450 6 days, 13 hours, and 7 minutes later. 29 00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:31,945 Maurice and Ralston have become the illusionist duo "Two for the Show." 30 00:01:32,257 --> 00:01:35,455 The mercurial world of magic and its associations 31 00:01:35,485 --> 00:01:37,749 had another effect on half-brother Ned, 32 00:01:38,137 --> 00:01:39,782 who could wake the dead... 33 00:01:39,868 --> 00:01:41,878 - Magicians? - Illusionists. 34 00:01:42,050 --> 00:01:43,877 At the mere mention of magic, 35 00:01:43,907 --> 00:01:48,194 he experienced the sting of anxiety-induced acid reflux. 36 00:01:48,639 --> 00:01:49,844 Who doesn't like magic? 37 00:01:50,900 --> 00:01:52,150 I love magic... 38 00:01:52,340 --> 00:01:54,673 as much as I love other forms of popular entertainment, 39 00:01:54,703 --> 00:01:58,073 like boxarate tae-kill-do cage-fighting or monster trucks on ice. 40 00:01:58,103 --> 00:02:00,375 To certain factions of the god-fearing public, 41 00:02:00,405 --> 00:02:02,565 magic is the devil's work, you little devils. 42 00:02:03,172 --> 00:02:05,179 Magically delicious little devils. 43 00:02:06,456 --> 00:02:07,739 Oh, I thought you were... 44 00:02:07,769 --> 00:02:09,673 magically delicious little devils. 45 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:12,150 Like a confection. 46 00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:15,235 Inside one of these pies is a prize. 47 00:02:15,265 --> 00:02:17,705 But which one? This pie? That pie? 48 00:02:17,765 --> 00:02:19,026 Pick a pie, any pie. 49 00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:20,318 That one! That one! 50 00:02:25,092 --> 00:02:26,923 You just magically julienned the cherries. 51 00:02:27,094 --> 00:02:28,366 But wait, there's more. 52 00:02:29,496 --> 00:02:31,803 - Oh! A magic show! - Oh! A magic show! 53 00:02:31,863 --> 00:02:33,096 A magic show?! 54 00:02:33,291 --> 00:02:35,973 Where did I put that rat's ass I could give? 55 00:02:36,327 --> 00:02:38,310 Magic ain't nothing but a voodoo grift. 56 00:02:38,340 --> 00:02:40,311 Magic is as magical as you want it to be. 57 00:02:40,524 --> 00:02:42,980 He magically put those tickets in that pie. 58 00:02:43,514 --> 00:02:44,919 If by "magically", you mean 59 00:02:44,949 --> 00:02:47,667 "made you look that way so you wouldn't see what they were doing this way", 60 00:02:47,697 --> 00:02:50,154 then, yes, those tickets alakazammed their way 61 00:02:50,325 --> 00:02:52,638 right underneath that delicious, flaky crust. 62 00:02:52,668 --> 00:02:55,788 Or Hocus pulled the damn tickets out of his pocket 63 00:02:55,818 --> 00:02:58,037 and Pocus slid them under the pie pan, 64 00:02:58,208 --> 00:03:01,315 as evidenced by the cherry-rhubarb crumble on his sleeve. 65 00:03:02,226 --> 00:03:05,169 We're performing after the second performance of the Great Herrmann. 66 00:03:05,340 --> 00:03:08,109 He's the big, muckety-muck patriarch of the Conjurer's Castle, 67 00:03:08,519 --> 00:03:09,633 and to us, too. 68 00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:11,160 After dad had to leave... 69 00:03:11,419 --> 00:03:13,329 - "Had to leave"? - Why else would he have left? 70 00:03:14,231 --> 00:03:17,083 After dad had to leave, Herrmann was the next best thing. 71 00:03:18,372 --> 00:03:20,378 Another magic dad. 72 00:03:20,593 --> 00:03:22,839 We'll introduce you after the show, if you come to the show. 73 00:03:23,791 --> 00:03:26,449 - Will you come , big brother? - Big half-brother, 74 00:03:26,479 --> 00:03:29,846 once removed by the fact that you didn't know I existed until last week. 75 00:03:29,949 --> 00:03:33,222 I'd like to RSVP in the resoundingly affirmative. 76 00:03:33,252 --> 00:03:35,158 I thought you said magic was a voodoo grift. 77 00:03:35,188 --> 00:03:36,601 It is a voodoo grift. 78 00:03:36,664 --> 00:03:39,687 But exposing these two and their fairy-dust deceptions 79 00:03:39,943 --> 00:03:43,693 will only hone my PI skills, much like a brainteaser or "Where's Waldo?". 80 00:03:43,753 --> 00:03:45,528 You're not invited if you're gonna heckle. 81 00:03:45,590 --> 00:03:46,696 But shazam... 82 00:03:47,388 --> 00:03:48,819 I have a ticket. 83 00:03:48,849 --> 00:03:51,033 I'll be there, front and center, loud and applauding, 84 00:03:51,095 --> 00:03:53,661 snapping like a beatnik or praising the lord, whatever you'd like. 85 00:03:53,822 --> 00:03:55,580 Loud and applauding! Loud and applauding! 86 00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:58,583 And preferably amazed. What do you say, frère pie maker? 87 00:03:59,613 --> 00:04:02,295 Look! There's a ticket with your name on it. 88 00:04:21,351 --> 00:04:23,235 You barely said a word to them. 89 00:04:23,265 --> 00:04:25,238 I barely know them. I saw them once when I was 9, 90 00:04:25,268 --> 00:04:28,321 and they were just those little bastards my father was cheating on me with. 91 00:04:28,497 --> 00:04:30,518 Those little bastards are now your little brothers. 92 00:04:30,548 --> 00:04:34,201 You can't just flash some jazz hands and then abracadabra... brotherly love. 93 00:04:34,263 --> 00:04:36,261 What he said. There should be a grace period, 94 00:04:36,291 --> 00:04:39,258 then a getting-to-know-you period, then a dinner on a national holiday. 95 00:04:39,288 --> 00:04:41,942 I invite them to the pie hole, and suddenly it's, 96 00:04:41,972 --> 00:04:44,087 "frère pie maker, come to our show." 97 00:04:44,275 --> 00:04:47,611 - It's a magic show. - What do you got against a magic show? 98 00:04:47,641 --> 00:04:50,551 There's sequins and drama and the promise of bloodshed. 99 00:04:50,816 --> 00:04:52,803 Next to pageants, they're my favorite thing. 100 00:04:53,050 --> 00:04:55,139 - They give me acid reflux. - Oh, here. 101 00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:56,474 Suck a lozenge. 102 00:04:57,229 --> 00:04:59,834 A lozenge that'll make me forget they're putting on a magic show, 103 00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:02,302 the kind of show my dad put on, so what they're pulling out 104 00:05:02,332 --> 00:05:05,059 of their magic hats isn't a rabbit, it's my childhood trauma. 105 00:05:05,089 --> 00:05:07,443 They're wearing it like a cape and taking it to the stage. 106 00:05:12,093 --> 00:05:14,215 I was just about to tell y'all to shut the hell up, 107 00:05:14,245 --> 00:05:16,220 and then you stopped talking so I didn't have to. 108 00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:18,722 Maurice and Ralston are the family that you didn't know you had. 109 00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:22,042 If I could talk to my aunt Lily as the mother I didn't know I had... 110 00:05:22,072 --> 00:05:24,001 Oh, I'd have a sea of questions. 111 00:05:24,580 --> 00:05:26,730 Don't you have a sea of questions? 112 00:05:27,191 --> 00:05:28,598 There may be a pond. 113 00:05:28,830 --> 00:05:30,318 Then dive in. 114 00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,676 I'm not a diver, I'm a cautious swimmer. 115 00:05:32,958 --> 00:05:36,973 I test the water with my big toe and then gently wade into the shallows. 116 00:05:37,322 --> 00:05:41,794 While the pie maker insisted on wading into the shallows of brotherly love, 117 00:05:41,945 --> 00:05:46,426 Chuck insisted on diving into the depths of a recent and strange revelation. 118 00:05:47,405 --> 00:05:50,932 Her aunt Lily was, in fact, her mother Lily. 119 00:05:51,734 --> 00:05:55,540 Not satisfied hearing such life-altering news secondhand, 120 00:05:55,841 --> 00:05:59,840 Chuck wanted to hear the words directly from her mother's lips. 121 00:06:00,572 --> 00:06:01,464 Hello? 122 00:06:01,693 --> 00:06:04,709 Oh, hello, I'm from Livelong Day Life Insurance. 123 00:06:04,946 --> 00:06:09,434 Now, we have an amazing mother's day offer for women who have given birth. 124 00:06:09,656 --> 00:06:12,131 Now, may I ask, do you qualify for... 125 00:06:13,702 --> 00:06:16,971 Our November cheese is rubbed with paprika. 126 00:06:17,090 --> 00:06:19,824 It is particularly appealing to... 127 00:06:20,350 --> 00:06:22,300 the woman who has had a bébé? 128 00:06:22,954 --> 00:06:25,130 Have you ever had a bébé? 129 00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:30,661 You've been randomly selected to receive your very own psychic reading. 130 00:06:31,426 --> 00:06:32,176 Hello? 131 00:06:35,066 --> 00:06:35,916 Oh, no. 132 00:06:36,509 --> 00:06:37,950 Here comes another magic dad. 133 00:06:39,135 --> 00:06:40,411 Is that the Great Herrmann? 134 00:06:40,514 --> 00:06:42,371 Maybe he could be your magic dad, too. 135 00:06:42,487 --> 00:06:45,161 Already had a magic dad. It didn't work out. 136 00:06:45,623 --> 00:06:47,251 I need another lozenge. 137 00:06:54,151 --> 00:06:56,385 Lozenge isn't working. Stomach acid's rising... 138 00:06:56,837 --> 00:06:58,763 As well as other contents of stomach. 139 00:06:58,823 --> 00:07:00,139 Are you the pie maker? 140 00:07:00,467 --> 00:07:02,099 I'm a pie maker. 141 00:07:02,384 --> 00:07:05,103 Hello! Excuse me, excuse me. 142 00:07:05,331 --> 00:07:07,342 I feel I should hug you. Can I give you a big hug? 143 00:07:07,372 --> 00:07:09,690 I'm already hugging and there's nothing you can do about it. 144 00:07:09,925 --> 00:07:10,816 I want a hug! 145 00:07:11,017 --> 00:07:12,405 I'm not made of hugs. 146 00:07:12,996 --> 00:07:15,245 Maurice and Ralston can't stop gushing. 147 00:07:15,275 --> 00:07:17,514 I'm so grateful that you came into their lives. 148 00:07:17,544 --> 00:07:20,573 Perhaps you can take some heat off me. The boys are rather needy. 149 00:07:20,814 --> 00:07:22,465 We'll talk about it later. 150 00:07:22,495 --> 00:07:24,826 Pretty girl, pretty girl, and you... 151 00:07:25,267 --> 00:07:29,142 I sense you're a great investigator of things unsolved... 152 00:07:29,368 --> 00:07:31,624 named after a poet and a fish. 153 00:07:32,509 --> 00:07:35,633 I sense you better give me my wallet 'fore I make my foot disappear up... 154 00:07:35,758 --> 00:07:37,255 The boys tell me you're a heckler. 155 00:07:37,618 --> 00:07:39,963 We don't play that way at the Conjurer's Castle, 156 00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:42,367 so let's nip that in the bud, shall we? 157 00:07:43,018 --> 00:07:45,638 And how do you propose nip, Herman? 158 00:07:45,870 --> 00:07:47,277 It's Herrmann. 159 00:07:47,918 --> 00:07:49,321 And this is how we nip. 160 00:07:49,923 --> 00:07:52,338 Ever had your breath taken, Emerson Cod? 161 00:07:52,368 --> 00:07:56,802 Leached from your lungs by a cement mass crushing you in a deadly embrace? 162 00:07:57,643 --> 00:07:58,393 No. 163 00:07:58,592 --> 00:08:02,379 In just moments, I will be contorting my shackled body into this box, 164 00:08:02,663 --> 00:08:06,401 which will then be filled with quick and hard brand quick-set cement 165 00:08:06,506 --> 00:08:08,029 and then welded shut. 166 00:08:08,604 --> 00:08:10,532 Demented and cemented, 167 00:08:11,016 --> 00:08:12,517 I give you "Cementia"! 168 00:08:13,602 --> 00:08:17,435 If my shackles are secure, Mr. Cod, then kindly return to the audience. 169 00:08:20,374 --> 00:08:22,522 Applause for Emerson Cod! 170 00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:26,891 Now you see me... 171 00:08:46,801 --> 00:08:48,618 It was no accident I chose you to volunteer. 172 00:08:48,809 --> 00:08:50,356 I require your keen eye 173 00:08:50,386 --> 00:08:52,780 in investigation of things in a personal matter. 174 00:08:52,810 --> 00:08:54,707 Someone has been killing my assistants. 175 00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:58,409 I invite you tonight to solve their murders. 176 00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:02,588 I live to amaze another day! 177 00:09:03,836 --> 00:09:06,769 But not another day after that. 178 00:09:12,248 --> 00:09:13,593 Her name was Alice. 179 00:09:13,623 --> 00:09:16,266 Tonight would've been our 200th performance together. 180 00:09:16,296 --> 00:09:17,988 I found her just like this... 181 00:09:18,237 --> 00:09:20,019 except over there. 182 00:09:20,275 --> 00:09:21,992 You turned your assistant into a bunny? 183 00:09:22,405 --> 00:09:24,525 My assistant has always been a bunny. 184 00:09:25,286 --> 00:09:27,331 I just wanted to see if he knew that. 185 00:09:27,514 --> 00:09:29,473 Alice was murdered like the others. 186 00:09:30,376 --> 00:09:33,828 Fred and Ginger were impaled when a rigging in my coat misfired. 187 00:09:34,171 --> 00:09:37,851 They would fly out of my pockets in a puff of glitter and birdseed 188 00:09:38,261 --> 00:09:40,511 as I strummed a chirping slide guitar. 189 00:09:41,406 --> 00:09:43,532 And Mercury, sweet Mercury. 190 00:09:43,777 --> 00:09:46,850 Mercury loved performing with balloons and children. 191 00:09:47,184 --> 00:09:48,978 That's when he was happiest of all. 192 00:09:49,277 --> 00:09:50,604 And now he's dead, 193 00:09:50,830 --> 00:09:53,005 bludgeoned by a falling sandbag. 194 00:09:53,331 --> 00:09:55,008 Who would want to kill all your animals? 195 00:09:55,870 --> 00:09:59,905 While we can appreciate and sympathize with your predicament, Mr Herrmann... 196 00:10:00,192 --> 00:10:01,323 Please, call me Great. 197 00:10:01,566 --> 00:10:02,316 No. 198 00:10:02,605 --> 00:10:04,952 We're private detectives, not pet detectives. 199 00:10:05,134 --> 00:10:07,429 It would sully my reputation as an expert in the field 200 00:10:07,459 --> 00:10:09,030 if I were to take to investigating 201 00:10:09,060 --> 00:10:11,959 missing "puddy tats" or dead "bunny wabbits". 202 00:10:12,100 --> 00:10:14,128 I want to help missing puddies and dead bunnies. 203 00:10:14,586 --> 00:10:18,465 I'm curious... Do pet detectives get paid more than the other kind? 204 00:10:19,052 --> 00:10:20,890 Pet detectives get paid a whole lot more, 205 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:23,902 so you need to get to prestidigitating a little more green 206 00:10:23,932 --> 00:10:25,347 if you want to get serious. 207 00:10:30,118 --> 00:10:32,563 - Blow on my hands. - Man, give me my damn money. 208 00:10:38,327 --> 00:10:40,112 Now, if you'll excuse me, 209 00:10:40,295 --> 00:10:42,197 the county bridge and tunnel folk have arrived 210 00:10:42,338 --> 00:10:43,550 for the 9:00. 211 00:10:46,075 --> 00:10:46,825 Great? 212 00:10:47,475 --> 00:10:48,911 I never got to ask... 213 00:10:48,941 --> 00:10:51,496 How exactly do you know Maurice and Ralston? 214 00:10:52,131 --> 00:10:54,791 I was there when their father left... Your father left. 215 00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:56,624 I had real good seats to that show. 216 00:10:56,654 --> 00:10:58,929 I was the dress rehearsal. The show sucked then. 217 00:10:58,959 --> 00:11:01,418 What do you tell a couple of kids you've never met 218 00:11:01,566 --> 00:11:04,511 that their dad, who you've never met, has just dropped 'em like they were hot? 219 00:11:04,541 --> 00:11:06,125 You can't sugarcoat that turd. 220 00:11:06,155 --> 00:11:08,263 No, not effectively. What did you tell them? 221 00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:09,556 What they wanted to hear. 222 00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:13,476 That their dad was an important man with important-man matters to attend to. 223 00:11:13,901 --> 00:11:17,748 Blah, blah, blah. Please stop crying. Blah. 224 00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:21,508 Did their da... my dad say anything to you? 225 00:11:21,725 --> 00:11:24,668 What was he gonna say? "Hey, the boys'll be hungry in an hour"? 226 00:11:24,698 --> 00:11:28,290 He was ditching the kids at a Sunday matinée, for christmas' sake. 227 00:11:28,796 --> 00:11:30,450 Thanks for looking out for them. 228 00:11:31,245 --> 00:11:32,827 Didn't have any other choice. 229 00:11:32,904 --> 00:11:35,208 Every day after school, they'd pop by, 230 00:11:35,238 --> 00:11:38,501 looking to be taught some new magic trick or play with my monkey. 231 00:11:39,057 --> 00:11:40,170 Heed this warning... 232 00:11:40,311 --> 00:11:43,673 Establish very clear boundaries early and often. 233 00:11:43,824 --> 00:11:45,974 I guess they just needed a father. 234 00:11:46,578 --> 00:11:47,478 Son... 235 00:11:47,997 --> 00:11:50,905 Ever feed a stray pussycat? It was like that. 236 00:11:50,935 --> 00:11:53,334 You love the pussycat, and I do love those boys, 237 00:11:53,364 --> 00:11:57,652 but that plate of tasty paté with the tuna sauce was not a promise. 238 00:12:00,177 --> 00:12:03,775 It was the promise of sisterly devotion that concerned Lily. 239 00:12:04,065 --> 00:12:07,607 30 years, 9 months ago, Lily broke that promise 240 00:12:07,637 --> 00:12:11,157 when she was impregnated by her sister Vivian's fiancé. 241 00:12:11,624 --> 00:12:13,730 Lily lived in fear that one day 242 00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:17,129 Vivian would discover her betrayal and settle her hash, 243 00:12:17,533 --> 00:12:21,066 and today that hash-settling day has come one day closer. 244 00:12:26,153 --> 00:12:27,258 Who the hell are you? 245 00:12:27,442 --> 00:12:30,223 "Who the hell he was" was Dwight Dixon. 246 00:12:30,635 --> 00:12:34,037 In his youth, Dwight Dixon brandished the blue beret 247 00:12:34,067 --> 00:12:36,289 of the United Nations Peacekeepers. 248 00:12:36,728 --> 00:12:39,770 Together with Chuck's father and the pie maker's father, 249 00:12:39,832 --> 00:12:42,374 Dwight performed tasks of peace enforcement 250 00:12:42,404 --> 00:12:46,565 and, in the process, learned many things about his brothers in arms... 251 00:12:47,156 --> 00:12:50,085 Some things Lily would rather he not know. 252 00:12:50,833 --> 00:12:52,401 Charles kept a picture of you. 253 00:12:52,731 --> 00:12:56,134 You were a mermaid sitting in the cradle of a giant fishhook 254 00:12:56,164 --> 00:12:58,347 with a clamshell brassiere and... 255 00:12:59,417 --> 00:13:01,167 the tail of a mackerel. 256 00:13:01,227 --> 00:13:03,078 I don't think we were ever mackerels. 257 00:13:03,108 --> 00:13:04,670 Oh, you were always a mackerel. 258 00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:06,345 Whenever I saw that picture, I'd say... 259 00:13:06,375 --> 00:13:07,465 "Holy mackerel." 260 00:13:08,443 --> 00:13:10,591 I heard that one coming from around the corner. 261 00:13:10,621 --> 00:13:12,257 It was wearing tap shoes. 262 00:13:12,371 --> 00:13:14,531 Charles never told me you were witty! 263 00:13:15,199 --> 00:13:17,736 It's probably the only thing he never told me about you. 264 00:13:17,766 --> 00:13:19,289 Boy, did he talk... 265 00:13:19,895 --> 00:13:20,802 about you... 266 00:13:20,832 --> 00:13:24,349 when he wasn't talking about this one, which was 99.9% of the time. 267 00:13:24,841 --> 00:13:26,991 I'm quite the conversation piece. 268 00:13:27,303 --> 00:13:30,730 When you opened that door, I got a "Rock 'em sock 'em robot" 269 00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:31,948 pow to the chin. 270 00:13:32,341 --> 00:13:35,118 Now I know why Charles always regretted 271 00:13:35,220 --> 00:13:37,662 letting another woman come between the two of you. 272 00:13:38,296 --> 00:13:39,664 He broke my heart. 273 00:13:40,290 --> 00:13:43,334 Charles broke a lot of hearts, but he only got his broken once. 274 00:13:44,437 --> 00:13:45,837 Knocked him for a doozy, too. 275 00:13:46,115 --> 00:13:47,631 Do you have a point to this visit, 276 00:13:47,661 --> 00:13:50,073 or did you just stop by for snorts and giggles? 277 00:13:50,103 --> 00:13:52,493 The snorts and giggles are the raisins in my oatmeal. 278 00:13:52,523 --> 00:13:56,389 No, I'm here for something... a common brass pocket watch. 279 00:13:56,692 --> 00:14:01,175 It belonged to Charles, hence it had a "CC" engraved on the back. 280 00:14:01,205 --> 00:14:04,374 It looked a lot like this one, which is mine, hence the "DD". 281 00:14:04,404 --> 00:14:06,256 We got 'em when we were in service together. 282 00:14:06,286 --> 00:14:07,525 I don't recall a watch. 283 00:14:08,483 --> 00:14:10,638 - Vivian, maybe... - She doesn't recall, either. 284 00:14:10,668 --> 00:14:11,418 Well, 285 00:14:11,856 --> 00:14:15,742 pocket watch or no pocket watch, I think I can tell when it's time for me to go. 286 00:14:17,354 --> 00:14:19,604 - I'll get your coat. - Thank you. 287 00:14:21,711 --> 00:14:24,327 I'm not gonna say anything to Vivian about what you did to her. 288 00:14:24,357 --> 00:14:25,807 That would be cruel. 289 00:14:25,979 --> 00:14:29,218 Not as cruel as what you did, but no need to quantify your sister's pain. 290 00:14:29,248 --> 00:14:31,174 Hey, don't come for me, fella. I fight dirty. 291 00:14:31,354 --> 00:14:32,643 I don't want to fight. 292 00:14:32,673 --> 00:14:34,928 I need to change your perception of me. 293 00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:38,190 Let's sit down and tear a pheasant together... you, me, and your sister. 294 00:14:38,220 --> 00:14:40,819 If I ever see you again, it won't be pheasant I'll be tearing. 295 00:14:41,370 --> 00:14:44,492 Tabasco. You sure are a spicy cocktail. 296 00:14:45,931 --> 00:14:50,262 While Lily was giving Dwight the stink-eye with the only eye she had, 297 00:14:50,759 --> 00:14:54,764 her sister, Vivian, had set her eyes on something much sweeter, 298 00:14:55,173 --> 00:14:58,891 a confection she hadn't tasted in quite some time... 299 00:15:00,707 --> 00:15:01,557 A date. 300 00:15:07,102 --> 00:15:09,085 As the Great Herrmann took to the stage 301 00:15:09,147 --> 00:15:10,949 for his second performance of the night... 302 00:15:10,979 --> 00:15:12,665 Now you see me... 303 00:15:17,822 --> 00:15:20,494 A murder investigation was being performed 304 00:15:20,524 --> 00:15:23,142 under the proscenium arch of his dressing room. 305 00:15:23,394 --> 00:15:24,352 Poor Mercury. 306 00:15:26,034 --> 00:15:29,065 - I wish you could tell who did you in. - He's a monkey. 307 00:15:29,167 --> 00:15:32,318 Barring and evolutionary leaps yet unheard of, the monkey can't talk. 308 00:15:32,687 --> 00:15:35,071 Well, he's also dead, which is why he really can't talk. 309 00:15:35,254 --> 00:15:37,265 - That's true, too. - Alice can talk. 310 00:15:37,295 --> 00:15:39,872 She's got burns on her lips and ulcers on her tongue. 311 00:15:39,902 --> 00:15:41,843 She's telling us that she was poisoned. 312 00:15:41,873 --> 00:15:44,301 We got a monkey flattened by a sandbag. 313 00:15:44,331 --> 00:15:46,791 Means the killer knows their way around backstage. 314 00:15:46,914 --> 00:15:50,762 We've got two doves impaled by bad taste and a malfunctioning coat gag. 315 00:15:50,792 --> 00:15:52,964 Killer knows how the Great Herrmann's tricks work. 316 00:15:53,081 --> 00:15:55,717 I think Alice ate the lettuce off the Great Herrmann's BLT. 317 00:15:56,166 --> 00:15:58,010 Killer knows how to make a sandwich. 318 00:15:58,071 --> 00:16:00,063 The lettuce was supposed to stay on the sandwich 319 00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,806 and be eaten by the Great Herrmann. 320 00:16:01,866 --> 00:16:05,560 The falling sandbag, the rigged jacket. Killer wasn't trying to kill animals. 321 00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:07,854 Killer was trying to kill the Great Herrmann. 322 00:16:15,739 --> 00:16:17,089 He didn't get out! 323 00:16:17,855 --> 00:16:19,205 He didn't get out! 324 00:16:25,204 --> 00:16:28,958 Isn't it funny how easy it is to remain calm when everyone else is freaking out? 325 00:16:33,431 --> 00:16:37,776 Sadly, the Great Herrmann had failed to escape his great escape. 326 00:16:38,196 --> 00:16:41,592 His untimely expiration was deemed by the authorities 327 00:16:41,622 --> 00:16:45,713 to be accidental death due to aggravated "Cementia." 328 00:16:45,743 --> 00:16:46,984 This wasn't an accident. 329 00:16:47,430 --> 00:16:49,747 The Great Herrmann performed that trick a thousand times. 330 00:16:49,777 --> 00:16:51,790 What did he do with all those cement blocks? 331 00:16:51,820 --> 00:16:55,335 Donated them to the Papen County Marine Institute to create artificial reefs. 332 00:16:55,365 --> 00:16:58,906 The Great Herrmann had a dedicated fan base of barnacles, corals, and oysters. 333 00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:03,417 Well, tonight the invertebrates of the sea will mourn his loss. 334 00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:05,036 Poor Herrmann. 335 00:17:05,443 --> 00:17:09,107 Fred and Ginger and Alice and Mercury. I want them all avenged! 336 00:17:09,137 --> 00:17:12,738 I'm sorry, but now that everyone's calmed down, I'm freaking out. 337 00:17:12,768 --> 00:17:14,818 I think it's the animal cruelty. 338 00:17:14,987 --> 00:17:15,963 Don't freak out. 339 00:17:16,066 --> 00:17:18,700 I know a dog and a pig that haven't been impaled, poisoned, or bludgeoned 340 00:17:18,730 --> 00:17:20,904 that need to be fed, loved, and walked. 341 00:17:20,934 --> 00:17:22,984 Maybe I'll go do that right now. 342 00:17:23,144 --> 00:17:25,431 I'm sorry about your next-best-thing magic dad. 343 00:17:26,398 --> 00:17:27,348 And I'm... 344 00:17:28,564 --> 00:17:30,414 I'm sorry about yours, too. 345 00:17:34,084 --> 00:17:35,503 He wasn't my... He didn't... 346 00:17:35,533 --> 00:17:37,943 We didn't have that kind of relationship. 347 00:17:38,552 --> 00:17:41,380 Although he did put his hand on my shoulder and called me "son", 348 00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:43,878 which felt like someone rubbed their feet across a shag rug, 349 00:17:43,908 --> 00:17:46,285 reached into my chest and gave my heart a static-electric pop. 350 00:17:46,388 --> 00:17:48,922 I always loved that static-electric pop. 351 00:17:48,952 --> 00:17:50,602 It's all very confusing. 352 00:17:50,821 --> 00:17:53,064 There's murdered magic dads and 353 00:17:53,094 --> 00:17:55,773 the promise of tasty paté with tuna sauce. 354 00:17:55,803 --> 00:17:58,927 What do you think you were saying? 'cause that ain't what came out. 355 00:17:58,957 --> 00:18:00,307 What I'm saying... 356 00:18:02,070 --> 00:18:03,219 I need to say to them. 357 00:18:05,478 --> 00:18:07,958 I'm gonna take care of this. Herrmann will be avenged. 358 00:18:07,988 --> 00:18:10,791 I don't mean vigilante justice, because what kind of example would that be? 359 00:18:10,821 --> 00:18:13,479 I mean regular go-to-jail-for-your-crimes justice. 360 00:18:13,774 --> 00:18:15,690 You gonna kick someone's ass, frère pie maker? 361 00:18:16,886 --> 00:18:17,636 Yes. 362 00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,470 I'm gonna kick someone's ass. 363 00:18:20,676 --> 00:18:24,952 And the ass-kicking would commence with the ass that poured the cement. 364 00:18:25,629 --> 00:18:27,243 I gave him plenty of time to get out. 365 00:18:27,303 --> 00:18:28,953 - Why didn't he get out? - Don't know. 366 00:18:29,258 --> 00:18:31,997 It's pretty cramped in there. Maybe he got a clot and passed out. 367 00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:34,774 - How'd he usually get out? - He doesn't tell me that stuff. 368 00:18:34,804 --> 00:18:36,416 The monkey knows more than I do. 369 00:18:36,446 --> 00:18:38,725 - You mean the dead monkey? - Yes, the dead monkey. 370 00:18:38,755 --> 00:18:40,944 What, are you gonna try and pin that one on me, too? 371 00:18:40,974 --> 00:18:43,285 - What about Fred and Ginger? - Don't forget the rabbit. 372 00:18:43,315 --> 00:18:45,063 Alice was the only one I liked. 373 00:18:45,093 --> 00:18:46,494 Damn monkey was mean. 374 00:18:46,524 --> 00:18:49,022 And those birds... those horrible birds. 375 00:18:49,456 --> 00:18:51,892 Every time they'd fly out of his pockets, they'd attack my weave. 376 00:18:52,109 --> 00:18:55,187 So when animals attack, you attack back, then kill the guy who trained them. 377 00:18:55,508 --> 00:18:59,109 No, I stand there humiliated by a mean monkey 378 00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:01,939 night after night for eight years. 379 00:19:01,969 --> 00:19:03,988 I told myself no more than 3, but it's been 8. 380 00:19:04,273 --> 00:19:07,699 I stand there, and I take it, hoping the Great Herrmann will make good 381 00:19:07,729 --> 00:19:10,161 on the carrot he's been dangling and give me my own act. 382 00:19:10,374 --> 00:19:12,913 Eight years of carrot-dangling while the Bobbsey Twins pass you by? 383 00:19:13,016 --> 00:19:14,354 Honey, you've been spurned, 384 00:19:14,705 --> 00:19:17,626 and next to the spurned lover, the spurned employee rides shotgun 385 00:19:17,849 --> 00:19:19,587 on the homicide chuckwagon. 386 00:19:19,753 --> 00:19:23,507 Herrmann and anyone he shared a stage with has ended up dead, except you. 387 00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:25,243 Which means you're the killer... 388 00:19:25,273 --> 00:19:26,218 Killer. 389 00:19:26,536 --> 00:19:28,738 Or... I'm next. 390 00:19:29,285 --> 00:19:31,849 Or it was an accident, and no one's next. 391 00:19:32,356 --> 00:19:33,806 Also, you're wrong. 392 00:19:34,527 --> 00:19:37,513 Someone else shared the stage with the Great Herrmann... 393 00:19:37,907 --> 00:19:38,873 The Geek. 394 00:19:39,841 --> 00:19:42,610 So, you like the comic books, and action figures? 395 00:19:43,198 --> 00:19:45,154 He's the kind that bites the heads off chickens. 396 00:19:45,564 --> 00:19:49,158 Oh, animal-rights groups put a stop to that kind of geek a long time ago. 397 00:19:50,021 --> 00:19:52,828 Performers dressing up as savages and eating live animals. 398 00:19:53,339 --> 00:19:56,017 It's tacky and a surefire way to alienate your audience. 399 00:19:56,508 --> 00:20:00,503 I eat glass and nails and regurgitate fish, frogs, and mice. 400 00:20:01,197 --> 00:20:02,755 I'm working my way up to a kitten. 401 00:20:02,857 --> 00:20:05,677 Regurgitating a kitten? That's a unique talent. 402 00:20:06,073 --> 00:20:08,732 I trained my body to do the extraordinary. 403 00:20:09,076 --> 00:20:11,765 My first job was as a plant in Herrmann's audience. 404 00:20:11,990 --> 00:20:13,014 That's how we met. 405 00:20:13,044 --> 00:20:15,912 He'd pretend to hypnotize me, and then, under his spell, 406 00:20:16,087 --> 00:20:18,419 I'd drink a bottle of beer and then eat the bottle. 407 00:20:18,644 --> 00:20:20,298 We were like a father-and-son act. 408 00:20:21,010 --> 00:20:24,561 What were you and your tummy doing when Herrmann was on stage getting cemented? 409 00:20:24,713 --> 00:20:27,493 I was walking the crowd. I pickpocket rings, watches, 410 00:20:27,523 --> 00:20:30,137 and keys and then regurgitate them later in my act. 411 00:20:30,523 --> 00:20:32,906 With all that happened, I forgot to give some of them back. 412 00:20:33,082 --> 00:20:34,440 Listen for yourself. 413 00:20:38,311 --> 00:20:39,542 Did you swallow a magnet? 414 00:20:40,058 --> 00:20:41,794 Somebody must've had one in their pocket. 415 00:20:42,848 --> 00:20:45,130 That's an amazing talent, Mister Geek. 416 00:20:45,190 --> 00:20:48,384 Herrmann was the only one around here who had any respect for my contribution. 417 00:20:48,652 --> 00:20:50,469 Any idea why he couldn't get out of that box? 418 00:20:50,572 --> 00:20:51,530 Can't say. 419 00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:54,803 I bet the Great Herrmann is in there right now striking some 420 00:20:54,949 --> 00:20:58,936 "Last days of Pompeii" pose that's gonna tell you everything you need to know. 421 00:20:59,445 --> 00:21:02,857 While the investigators continued to ponder why the Great Herrmann 422 00:21:02,959 --> 00:21:04,855 did not get out... 423 00:21:07,245 --> 00:21:08,172 Olive Snook... 424 00:21:08,202 --> 00:21:11,479 was about to ponder how someone else did. 425 00:21:12,903 --> 00:21:13,801 We're closed. 426 00:21:15,456 --> 00:21:16,854 Vivian! You're out! 427 00:21:17,003 --> 00:21:19,717 I thought we'd agreed you'd call before dropping by unexpectedly, 428 00:21:19,747 --> 00:21:21,766 which would have been expected had you called. 429 00:21:21,796 --> 00:21:24,819 I couldn't risk sending a message and Lily intercepting it. 430 00:21:24,849 --> 00:21:27,047 This has to be covert. 431 00:21:27,268 --> 00:21:28,462 I'm on a date... 432 00:21:28,784 --> 00:21:30,276 with a man. 433 00:21:32,331 --> 00:21:33,248 Evening. 434 00:21:34,145 --> 00:21:35,092 Evening. 435 00:21:36,299 --> 00:21:38,517 We walked out of that sandstorm with our boots, our berets, 436 00:21:38,577 --> 00:21:40,904 and our pocket watches with 437 00:21:40,934 --> 00:21:42,221 no pockets to put them in. 438 00:21:43,985 --> 00:21:46,463 We made a spit pact, like in the boy scouts. 439 00:21:47,107 --> 00:21:49,910 Last one alive and kicking takes them watches into the desert 440 00:21:50,046 --> 00:21:52,456 and lets the sandstorm claim them. 441 00:21:52,486 --> 00:21:55,206 That's so very romantic and poetic, 442 00:21:55,635 --> 00:21:57,928 and you certainly took your time to come calling. 443 00:21:57,958 --> 00:21:59,786 Charles has been dead for 20 years. 444 00:21:59,816 --> 00:22:01,415 I've been in prison for 22. 445 00:22:01,679 --> 00:22:04,043 - Emotional or federal? - I'm gonna say "yes" to both. 446 00:22:04,190 --> 00:22:06,173 I can only say "yes" to one. 447 00:22:06,912 --> 00:22:08,630 Must seem a little less romantic now. 448 00:22:08,961 --> 00:22:09,833 Oh, no. 449 00:22:11,020 --> 00:22:12,217 On the contrary. 450 00:22:13,023 --> 00:22:14,929 I knew what kind of man Charles was, 451 00:22:15,118 --> 00:22:18,223 and the way you tell it, you boys sound more like bandits 452 00:22:18,284 --> 00:22:19,762 than peacekeepers. 453 00:22:20,006 --> 00:22:21,381 We were a little of both. 454 00:22:22,204 --> 00:22:24,449 About Charles' pocket watch... 455 00:22:24,719 --> 00:22:25,731 I do recall it. 456 00:22:25,834 --> 00:22:28,801 So does Lily. I don't know why she lied to you. 457 00:22:28,947 --> 00:22:30,537 I think she just wanted you to leave. 458 00:22:30,567 --> 00:22:32,743 If Lily wants to keep that watch, she should keep it. 459 00:22:32,773 --> 00:22:34,125 She didn't keep it. 460 00:22:34,155 --> 00:22:37,172 We buried it with our niece, lonely tourist Charlotte Charles. 461 00:22:38,001 --> 00:22:40,555 It was her father's. We wanted her to have it. 462 00:22:41,057 --> 00:22:44,833 That poor girl murdered on a Tahitian getaway. That was Charles' little girl? 463 00:22:45,246 --> 00:22:48,634 Lily is sensitive when it comes to Charlotte. 464 00:22:48,790 --> 00:22:50,086 Of course she is. 465 00:22:51,092 --> 00:22:52,257 She lost her daughter. 466 00:22:52,629 --> 00:22:53,654 - Niece! - Niece. 467 00:22:53,684 --> 00:22:55,588 I know what the relationship is. 468 00:22:55,618 --> 00:22:59,513 I'm just saying, I think you both lost a daughter. 469 00:23:00,411 --> 00:23:03,435 You raised the girl. How could you not feel like she's your own? 470 00:23:05,027 --> 00:23:08,169 I'm glad the pocket watch is with Charlotte. 471 00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:12,022 Because now, he knew where to find it, 472 00:23:12,188 --> 00:23:13,720 or so he thought, 473 00:23:14,215 --> 00:23:16,671 just as our private investigators thought they knew 474 00:23:16,701 --> 00:23:19,184 where to find the Great Herrmann. 475 00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:22,013 Where's the Great Herrmann? 476 00:23:24,295 --> 00:23:25,365 Give me that. 477 00:23:29,051 --> 00:23:30,337 Now you see me... 478 00:23:30,729 --> 00:23:35,017 "... And now you don't. Double kisses, double hugs, the Great Herrmann." 479 00:23:35,047 --> 00:23:36,646 Son of a bitch. 480 00:23:41,492 --> 00:23:43,153 It was a disappearing act. 481 00:23:43,405 --> 00:23:44,559 Now you see him... 482 00:23:44,999 --> 00:23:45,929 now you don't. 483 00:23:46,322 --> 00:23:48,553 The good news is he's still alive... 484 00:23:48,832 --> 00:23:50,809 - somewhere. - Why would Herrmann disappear? 485 00:23:50,869 --> 00:23:52,608 He wouldn't disappeared unless he had to. 486 00:23:52,638 --> 00:23:55,932 He's an important man. He probably had important-man matters to attend to. 487 00:23:57,024 --> 00:23:58,810 That's what Herrmann told us when dad left. 488 00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:02,029 That's why "oh". It was an attempt to corral those words back into my mouth. 489 00:24:02,567 --> 00:24:05,590 What did Herrmann tell you about when dad left? 490 00:24:06,094 --> 00:24:07,534 Did he say why dad had to leave? 491 00:24:08,673 --> 00:24:10,370 He told me what he told you. 492 00:24:10,734 --> 00:24:12,956 Did he tell you anything he didn't tell us? 493 00:24:13,495 --> 00:24:15,292 There may have been select details. 494 00:24:15,743 --> 00:24:17,290 The facts were these... 495 00:24:17,655 --> 00:24:19,831 On a cool autumn day 9 years, 496 00:24:19,861 --> 00:24:22,883 48 weeks, 26 days, and 7 hours earlier, 497 00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:26,680 Maurice and Ralston's father promised them a magic show 498 00:24:26,710 --> 00:24:28,368 they would never forget. 499 00:24:28,574 --> 00:24:32,924 A new magician, cleverly billed as Herman Gunt's Magic Express, 500 00:24:33,139 --> 00:24:35,104 called for a volunteer. 501 00:24:36,312 --> 00:24:38,848 "I'll be back", dear dad said. 502 00:25:05,436 --> 00:25:09,213 The fledgling magician tried to comfort the fatherless boys 503 00:25:09,419 --> 00:25:13,868 with vague but important motives behind their dear dad's disappearance. 504 00:25:15,614 --> 00:25:17,406 The twins' fragile hearts 505 00:25:17,436 --> 00:25:20,509 gladly believed in the illusion of his words... 506 00:25:21,049 --> 00:25:22,570 Until now. 507 00:25:23,898 --> 00:25:25,205 He wasn't an important man. 508 00:25:25,235 --> 00:25:27,406 He didn't have important-man matters to attend to. 509 00:25:27,599 --> 00:25:28,757 Your dad... 510 00:25:29,570 --> 00:25:30,503 our dad... 511 00:25:30,971 --> 00:25:33,412 was just some guy ditching his kids at a Sunday matinée. 512 00:25:33,562 --> 00:25:36,893 That's what Herrmann told me. That's what he didn't tell you. 513 00:25:37,562 --> 00:25:40,118 He didn't want to hurt you anymore than you had already been hurt. 514 00:25:40,697 --> 00:25:42,430 You sure didn't have a problem telling us. 515 00:25:42,460 --> 00:25:43,178 Yeah! 516 00:25:43,290 --> 00:25:46,423 In my defense, you badgered me a little, and considerable time has passed. 517 00:25:47,392 --> 00:25:49,553 I probably sound like some horrible missionary showing up 518 00:25:49,613 --> 00:25:52,014 and telling the natives they're worshipping a false god, but... 519 00:25:52,299 --> 00:25:53,383 you kind of are. 520 00:25:54,748 --> 00:25:56,448 He left three sons. 521 00:25:57,570 --> 00:25:59,619 There really isn't a good excuse. 522 00:25:59,756 --> 00:26:02,341 Did Herrmann tell you Ralston wet himself when dad disappeared? 523 00:26:02,371 --> 00:26:05,708 It was years before we could perform a disappearing act without using a mop. 524 00:26:05,961 --> 00:26:07,237 Why would you say that? 525 00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:10,174 I get anxiety-induced acid reflux at the mere mention of magic. 526 00:26:10,204 --> 00:26:11,992 Ralston, you wet yourself. 527 00:26:12,572 --> 00:26:15,172 We're two grown men with dad-related body-fluid issues. 528 00:26:15,202 --> 00:26:18,916 I can't suck lozenges for the rest of my life, and you can't wear adult diapers. 529 00:26:18,976 --> 00:26:20,782 I learned to control my bladder years ago. 530 00:26:22,109 --> 00:26:23,262 Good for you. 531 00:26:23,611 --> 00:26:26,298 I know my acid reflux is just heartburn, 532 00:26:26,870 --> 00:26:28,294 and your heart's burning, too. 533 00:26:28,624 --> 00:26:30,545 Look at the way you're holding on to that scarf. 534 00:26:30,575 --> 00:26:32,936 You're not clinging to Herrmann. You're clinging to dad. 535 00:26:34,019 --> 00:26:35,864 Holding tighter isn't gonna bring him back. 536 00:26:36,124 --> 00:26:37,893 It's not gonna bring either of them back. 537 00:26:42,202 --> 00:26:43,366 Where's the rest of it? 538 00:26:43,396 --> 00:26:46,026 Wasn't it in that block of cement with Herrmann's, now you don't note? 539 00:26:46,591 --> 00:26:49,497 Yeah, it probably should've been, huh? 540 00:26:51,993 --> 00:26:54,729 The great Herrmann is dead. He died from "Cementia" 541 00:26:54,759 --> 00:26:57,704 on stage with the rest of this scarf around his neck. 542 00:26:58,007 --> 00:27:00,241 I knew I shouldn't have came in here. I knew it. 543 00:27:00,271 --> 00:27:02,766 I should have took my ass home, turned off my phone, 544 00:27:02,796 --> 00:27:05,102 and got up under the covers, but no. 545 00:27:05,368 --> 00:27:07,174 Someone switched the blocks. 546 00:27:07,204 --> 00:27:09,015 It's classic sleight of hand. 547 00:27:09,045 --> 00:27:11,413 Herrmann was that little ball under the coconut shell. 548 00:27:11,443 --> 00:27:14,331 Someone shuffled the shells around, and we looked under the wrong one. 549 00:27:14,597 --> 00:27:18,267 There were two performances of "Cementia", so two blocks. 550 00:27:18,500 --> 00:27:21,571 Killer shuffles the blocks, hides the one with Herrmann's body in it, and 551 00:27:21,734 --> 00:27:25,107 everybody thinks the great Great just disappeared into his disappearing act. 552 00:27:26,126 --> 00:27:28,173 And no body, no murder. 553 00:27:28,347 --> 00:27:30,293 Makes for a great urban legend, though. 554 00:27:30,323 --> 00:27:32,915 How do you shuffle a 500-pound block of cement? 555 00:27:33,262 --> 00:27:34,450 Forklift. 556 00:27:34,516 --> 00:27:37,089 Only one block was forklifted out of the Conjurer's Castle tonight. 557 00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:38,984 Which means the other one is still inside. 558 00:27:39,014 --> 00:27:41,703 The switch had to happen somewhere between the stage and the loading dock 559 00:27:41,733 --> 00:27:44,276 when people weren't watching the blocks too carefully. 560 00:27:44,887 --> 00:27:48,545 Using metal detectors to detect the metal of the shackles 561 00:27:48,575 --> 00:27:51,611 worn by the Great Herrmann while performing "Cementia"... 562 00:27:52,277 --> 00:27:53,550 "Two for the show", 563 00:27:53,580 --> 00:27:57,073 featuring Olive Snook, began their search at the loading dock. 564 00:27:57,103 --> 00:27:58,837 Well, I always loved a good treasure hunt. 565 00:27:59,337 --> 00:28:01,985 The private investigator, the pie maker and Chuck 566 00:28:02,015 --> 00:28:04,434 began their search under the stage. 567 00:28:04,464 --> 00:28:06,240 It might not be the cement that killed him. 568 00:28:06,270 --> 00:28:08,692 We could chisel open that block and find a murder weapon, like 569 00:28:08,922 --> 00:28:11,835 a Mojave rattlesnake or a hidden hypodermic needle 570 00:28:11,865 --> 00:28:15,254 that the Great Herrmann unknowingly injected himself with whilst contorting. 571 00:28:15,284 --> 00:28:18,315 Or we could chisel open that block and find he drowned in cement. 572 00:28:18,345 --> 00:28:20,240 Well, when we do chisel it open, 573 00:28:20,270 --> 00:28:23,613 it's too bad Maurice and Ralston can't talk to the Great Herrmann. 574 00:28:24,138 --> 00:28:25,995 They didn't get a chance to say goodbye. 575 00:28:26,250 --> 00:28:27,975 The boohoo bosom done dried up. 576 00:28:28,005 --> 00:28:31,332 Well, my boohoo bosom is plumping and brimming with milk. 577 00:28:32,628 --> 00:28:36,448 A small conversation can go a long way, even under the falsest of pretenses. 578 00:28:36,478 --> 00:28:38,520 Have you been crank-calling Lily again? 579 00:28:39,030 --> 00:28:40,216 Not recently... 580 00:28:40,815 --> 00:28:44,128 Although that does depend on how you define "recently". 581 00:28:44,158 --> 00:28:46,026 Woman, don't you know people have caller ID? 582 00:28:47,115 --> 00:28:50,233 There's something underneath these floorboards. 583 00:28:55,394 --> 00:28:57,568 I give you "Cementia". 584 00:28:57,823 --> 00:28:59,690 Herrmann slid right off the stage 585 00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:02,282 and dropped into this strategically jackhammered grave. 586 00:29:02,312 --> 00:29:05,123 Out of all the ways to have your body stashed, this one's not so terrible. 587 00:29:05,692 --> 00:29:07,584 Maybe the killer wanted the great Herrmann 588 00:29:07,645 --> 00:29:09,571 to be part of the Conjurer's Castle forever. 589 00:29:09,601 --> 00:29:12,779 If the killer cared that much, you'd think he'd at least break out his trowel 590 00:29:12,809 --> 00:29:15,046 and make the thing look nice. Look at those edges. 591 00:29:15,076 --> 00:29:16,659 He's got to fill all this in. 592 00:29:16,689 --> 00:29:19,199 Lord knows there's enough cement in the house. 593 00:29:24,244 --> 00:29:26,603 Did someone just turn on the cement mixer? 594 00:29:29,908 --> 00:29:31,833 Maybe it's Olive and the boys. 595 00:29:31,863 --> 00:29:33,294 Maybe what's Olive and the boys? 596 00:29:33,688 --> 00:29:36,422 - Whoever turned on the cement mixer. - You found the Great Herrmann. 597 00:29:36,660 --> 00:29:38,424 Whoever dropped this block in there 598 00:29:38,557 --> 00:29:41,712 is back to make sure Herrmann is part of the Conjurer's Castle forever. 599 00:29:41,867 --> 00:29:43,119 That's his killer? 600 00:29:44,912 --> 00:29:46,840 No, no! Fools rush in! 601 00:29:46,870 --> 00:29:48,064 We're not fools! 602 00:29:49,106 --> 00:29:50,265 Over there! 603 00:29:50,871 --> 00:29:52,647 They sprang like attack monkeys. 604 00:29:52,707 --> 00:29:55,232 I'll take care of them. You take care of him. 605 00:29:55,963 --> 00:29:57,265 Do either of you have a gun? 606 00:29:57,669 --> 00:29:58,593 - No. - No. 607 00:29:59,015 --> 00:30:00,335 I'm going with Emerson. 608 00:30:03,607 --> 00:30:05,820 Don't be going around chasing murder suspects willy-nilly. 609 00:30:05,850 --> 00:30:08,162 What you gonna do? Use your wonder-twin powers? 610 00:30:11,046 --> 00:30:12,253 Wait for me! 611 00:30:14,551 --> 00:30:15,670 - Emerson. - What? 612 00:30:15,802 --> 00:30:16,673 In here. 613 00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:21,139 Is he dead? 614 00:30:21,169 --> 00:30:22,376 That's the Geek. 615 00:30:22,599 --> 00:30:25,638 He eats glass and swallows small animals. What's that up his nose? 616 00:30:26,043 --> 00:30:28,808 Maybe it's a small animal trying to crawl to freedom. 617 00:30:35,655 --> 00:30:38,150 Oh, no, that's all the way up in there. He's dead. 618 00:30:38,487 --> 00:30:40,152 Yeah, he's... he's... he's gone. 619 00:30:44,165 --> 00:30:46,643 You killed Herrmann, buried him in the floor, 620 00:30:46,673 --> 00:30:49,120 and then you snuck back in here so you could seal the deal 621 00:30:49,211 --> 00:30:50,931 with some more of your cement handiwork. 622 00:30:51,309 --> 00:30:54,333 But you got surprised by the Geek, and then you killed him, too. 623 00:30:54,841 --> 00:30:56,302 Is that how you're gonna frame me 624 00:30:56,332 --> 00:30:58,410 after you beat me to death with your metal detectors? 625 00:30:58,440 --> 00:30:59,714 I am an unarmed woman. 626 00:30:59,846 --> 00:31:02,225 Why don't you calibrate those things to find your manhood? 627 00:31:02,255 --> 00:31:04,365 If you didn't kill anybody and you ain't running 'round 628 00:31:04,395 --> 00:31:07,138 here burying bodies and disposing of witnesses, what you doin' here? 629 00:31:07,462 --> 00:31:08,630 Packing. 630 00:31:09,011 --> 00:31:12,157 The universe killed Herrmann to send me a message, 631 00:31:12,187 --> 00:31:15,201 and that message is that eight years is long enough to wait for a carrot. 632 00:31:15,231 --> 00:31:18,779 Yeah, well, my associates is out digging up that carrot you been trying to bury, 633 00:31:18,809 --> 00:31:21,193 and we gonna see what the universe has to say about that. 634 00:31:21,453 --> 00:31:24,500 As Emerson Cod chiseled away at his suspect, 635 00:31:24,530 --> 00:31:27,783 the pie maker and Chuck chiseled away at the Great Herrmann. 636 00:31:28,987 --> 00:31:31,537 I live to amaze another day! 637 00:31:31,598 --> 00:31:33,255 No, you live to amaze another minute. 638 00:31:33,285 --> 00:31:35,753 You've been crushed by "Cementia's" deadly embrace. 639 00:31:35,783 --> 00:31:37,337 I was hoping that didn't happen. 640 00:31:37,367 --> 00:31:39,253 How am I talking right now and not dead? 641 00:31:39,532 --> 00:31:41,173 - Magic. - It's a family trait. 642 00:31:41,203 --> 00:31:43,021 Must have gotten that from your father. 643 00:31:43,051 --> 00:31:45,396 And that's some potent kung fu. 644 00:31:45,426 --> 00:31:48,200 Herrmann, look, I know that asking a magician to reveal the secret 645 00:31:48,230 --> 00:31:50,673 - behind his great escape is very rude. - Then don't do it. 646 00:31:50,703 --> 00:31:52,016 Nobody likes rude. 647 00:31:52,076 --> 00:31:53,646 It could help us catch your killer. 648 00:31:54,937 --> 00:31:57,631 Magic man to magic man. Plug your ears. 649 00:31:57,931 --> 00:31:59,956 Magic man to magic man, 650 00:31:59,986 --> 00:32:04,387 the Great Herrmann detailed the facts of the escape that wasn't. 651 00:32:04,596 --> 00:32:06,238 It was not magic that 652 00:32:06,371 --> 00:32:10,275 got the Great Herrmann out of his box, but a series of trapdoors. 653 00:32:10,785 --> 00:32:15,039 But a magnet concealed in his shoe was not underfoot. 654 00:32:21,251 --> 00:32:24,298 Magnets in your shoes? That's the secret to your greatest trick? 655 00:32:24,526 --> 00:32:27,926 I could've lied to you. Told you it was force fields or telekinesis. 656 00:32:27,956 --> 00:32:31,727 Somebody snatched the magnets out of my shoes while I wasn't wearing them. 657 00:32:31,757 --> 00:32:33,905 Do you have any last words or regrets or 658 00:32:33,935 --> 00:32:36,879 something you'd maybe like to say to Maurice and Ralston? 659 00:32:37,319 --> 00:32:39,313 Something I'd like them to have. 660 00:32:39,775 --> 00:32:41,632 My freezer has a false bottom. 661 00:32:41,662 --> 00:32:45,152 Inside, you'll find my magic book of magic tricks and illusions. 662 00:32:45,285 --> 00:32:46,696 Give it to Maurice and Ralston. 663 00:32:47,009 --> 00:32:50,157 - I'd like to keep it in the family. - Time for my next trick. 664 00:32:50,401 --> 00:32:53,285 With a bit of showmanship, if you don't mind. 665 00:32:53,815 --> 00:32:55,371 Now you see me... 666 00:32:56,352 --> 00:32:58,773 There were supposed to be magnets in the Great Herrmann's shoes. 667 00:32:58,803 --> 00:33:01,032 That's how he triggers the trapdoor and escapes "Cementia". 668 00:33:01,062 --> 00:33:03,408 Someone stole the magnets so he couldn't escape. 669 00:33:03,438 --> 00:33:05,881 After Herrmann died, there were magnets in the Geek's stomach. 670 00:33:06,055 --> 00:33:08,092 - So what? - Sew buttons. 671 00:33:08,458 --> 00:33:10,577 He ate the evidence. The Geek's the killer. 672 00:33:10,607 --> 00:33:12,880 The Geek ain't the killer. The Geek is dead. 673 00:33:12,910 --> 00:33:15,026 Black magic woman killed him. 674 00:33:15,695 --> 00:33:19,257 She took that dangling carrot and jammed it in that damn fool's head. 675 00:33:19,287 --> 00:33:21,479 Stop saying that. I did not. 676 00:33:21,509 --> 00:33:23,439 In fact, she hadn't. 677 00:33:23,932 --> 00:33:26,753 They did not just leave me with a dead body. 678 00:33:37,856 --> 00:33:40,475 - Right now, I feel like I'm very calm. - You are. You are. 679 00:33:40,505 --> 00:33:44,211 Thank you, and I want to stay that way, but I need you to stay calm, too. 680 00:33:44,241 --> 00:33:46,449 - So what's our promise to each other? - Stay calm. 681 00:33:46,479 --> 00:33:48,773 - Which means? - No screaming? 682 00:33:48,977 --> 00:33:50,339 You're wonderful. 683 00:33:50,369 --> 00:33:52,263 I can't wait to let you go. 684 00:33:52,293 --> 00:33:54,259 Everybody can see you. 685 00:33:54,540 --> 00:33:56,179 Olive, are you okay? 686 00:33:56,881 --> 00:33:57,977 I'm calm? 687 00:33:58,007 --> 00:34:00,936 Hey, nerd, you need to get yourself a bigger human shield or something. 688 00:34:00,966 --> 00:34:02,936 You hanging out all sorts of places I could shoot. 689 00:34:03,304 --> 00:34:05,221 How about you just let wee lady wee go? 690 00:34:05,621 --> 00:34:07,505 Well, I have a gun, too. 691 00:34:07,851 --> 00:34:10,237 I swallowed a pearl-handled pistol. 692 00:34:10,501 --> 00:34:13,146 I'm cocking the trigger with my stomach muscles right now, 693 00:34:13,249 --> 00:34:16,649 and when it flies out of my mouth, it's going to shoot you in the face! 694 00:34:16,679 --> 00:34:17,756 I did hear a click. 695 00:34:17,786 --> 00:34:19,692 Wait... It's a click-clicking. 696 00:34:19,722 --> 00:34:21,154 Oh, never mind. It's a watch. 697 00:34:21,257 --> 00:34:24,162 You ain't shooting nobody in their face, Tums. 698 00:34:24,338 --> 00:34:26,159 You are not gonna get away with murder. 699 00:34:26,262 --> 00:34:27,590 Ned, he's got a nail. 700 00:34:27,762 --> 00:34:29,331 The facts were these... 701 00:34:29,361 --> 00:34:32,034 The Geek, a.k.a. Gunther Pinker, 702 00:34:32,064 --> 00:34:34,761 saw a father in the Great Herrmann 703 00:34:34,791 --> 00:34:37,712 and a long and happy future performing together. 704 00:34:38,824 --> 00:34:41,674 But Herrmann did not see a son in him... 705 00:34:41,704 --> 00:34:45,194 Only a novelty act whose novelty had run out. 706 00:34:52,173 --> 00:34:56,360 Herrmann had conveniently arranged his own funeral in "Cementia." 707 00:34:58,226 --> 00:35:01,255 The keys to his escape were consumed. 708 00:35:02,383 --> 00:35:06,856 He made the Great Herrmann vanish and replaced him with another cube. 709 00:35:06,886 --> 00:35:08,791 No body, no murder. 710 00:35:08,821 --> 00:35:10,857 He intended to return with his trowel 711 00:35:10,887 --> 00:35:14,689 and seal the Great Herrmann's grave with the very brand of cement 712 00:35:14,719 --> 00:35:16,153 that took his life. 713 00:35:16,347 --> 00:35:18,421 I would have eaten anything for that man. 714 00:35:18,597 --> 00:35:20,099 I loved him like a father. 715 00:35:20,129 --> 00:35:21,839 He shouldn't have called your act cheap. 716 00:35:21,942 --> 00:35:26,023 That first beer bottle I ate for him was a promise, a promise he broke. 717 00:35:26,322 --> 00:35:29,889 He turned his back on me, abandoned me like I was... cheap. 718 00:35:30,284 --> 00:35:33,693 I was abandoned by my father when I was 9. I hated him for leaving me. 719 00:35:33,723 --> 00:35:35,689 I wrote letters to my future self 720 00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:38,486 telling future me to never forgive my father and to always hold a grudge. 721 00:35:38,516 --> 00:35:41,401 Those letters were little, angry time capsules. 722 00:35:42,503 --> 00:35:44,498 But being angry didn't help. 723 00:35:45,174 --> 00:35:46,713 Despite what he did to me... 724 00:35:48,367 --> 00:35:49,576 I still loved him, 725 00:35:49,678 --> 00:35:50,869 and... 726 00:35:50,971 --> 00:35:52,148 I wanted him back. 727 00:35:52,178 --> 00:35:52,929 Now! 728 00:36:05,486 --> 00:36:07,927 The Geek, a.k.a. Gunther Pinker, 729 00:36:08,136 --> 00:36:12,069 regurgitator of fish, frogs, mice and now kittens, 730 00:36:12,099 --> 00:36:16,526 was arrested for the murder of the Great Herrmann, a.k.a. Herman Gunt. 731 00:36:16,959 --> 00:36:21,190 When they were ready, twin magicians Maurice and Ralston dealt 732 00:36:21,293 --> 00:36:23,276 with the loss of their magic dad, 733 00:36:23,306 --> 00:36:26,108 finding his book of secrets where he had left it. 734 00:36:26,497 --> 00:36:30,934 But they knew there was someone who had waited eight long years for that carrot. 735 00:36:30,964 --> 00:36:32,304 We'll make you a photocopy. 736 00:36:32,532 --> 00:36:35,575 And with it, Alexandria the assistant 737 00:36:35,605 --> 00:36:38,123 would become the Great Alexandria, 738 00:36:38,153 --> 00:36:41,138 newest headliner at the Conjurer's Castle. 739 00:36:42,231 --> 00:36:45,859 As for the pie maker, he discovered a new side to magic. 740 00:36:46,105 --> 00:36:48,637 Magic was not just what disappears, 741 00:36:48,667 --> 00:36:51,681 but what reappears when you least expect it. 742 00:36:51,882 --> 00:36:56,373 Emboldened with this new perspective and free of the sting of acid reflux, 743 00:36:56,403 --> 00:37:00,479 the pie maker arranged a private magic show for the girl he loved. 744 00:37:00,509 --> 00:37:01,564 Are you ready? 745 00:37:03,096 --> 00:37:06,653 Well, if we're going to a magic show, I hope you've got your lozenges. 746 00:37:06,925 --> 00:37:08,420 Oh, sorry. 747 00:37:08,700 --> 00:37:10,823 You helped me conquer my lozenge dependency. 748 00:37:11,142 --> 00:37:13,534 As terrifying as it is, magic runs in my family... 749 00:37:14,327 --> 00:37:16,911 And I kind of like being frère pie maker. 750 00:37:17,808 --> 00:37:21,811 It's a nice feeling to be able to talk to the family you didn't know you had. 751 00:37:24,362 --> 00:37:25,880 Okay, you can look. 752 00:37:26,726 --> 00:37:27,872 Yeah? 753 00:37:28,772 --> 00:37:29,935 Okay. 754 00:37:43,304 --> 00:37:45,749 I want you to have that same nice feeling. 755 00:37:47,122 --> 00:37:48,945 Do you want to talk to your mom? 756 00:37:50,007 --> 00:37:51,656 Are we gonna crank-call Lily? 757 00:37:52,103 --> 00:37:54,273 - In a way. - Ding-dong-ditch? 758 00:37:57,512 --> 00:37:58,262 How? 759 00:37:58,561 --> 00:38:00,939 A small conversation can go a long way, 760 00:38:01,115 --> 00:38:03,042 even under the falsest of pretenses. 761 00:38:05,073 --> 00:38:07,755 Okay, now that Vivian has gone to bed, 762 00:38:08,903 --> 00:38:10,258 have you ever role-played? 763 00:38:10,663 --> 00:38:12,414 Oh, I've role-played... 764 00:38:13,176 --> 00:38:16,200 but never in a context I'd be comfortable role-playing with you. 765 00:38:16,888 --> 00:38:18,718 Oh, no, not... not that kind of a role-play. 766 00:38:18,748 --> 00:38:20,302 More Olives... Olive. 767 00:38:21,533 --> 00:38:25,106 This is a work-your-grooves-out kind of a role-play, 768 00:38:25,167 --> 00:38:27,095 not get-your-groove-on. 769 00:38:27,341 --> 00:38:28,238 Oh, okay. 770 00:38:28,268 --> 00:38:32,047 You've told me things only me, you and that nunnery know about Charlotte. 771 00:38:32,925 --> 00:38:34,157 You being her mother and 772 00:38:34,942 --> 00:38:36,926 - not being her mother. - That again. 773 00:38:36,956 --> 00:38:38,306 Say, when you were a jockey, 774 00:38:38,336 --> 00:38:40,747 did you ride the horses or just beat them after they were dead? 775 00:38:40,808 --> 00:38:43,523 I'm not talking about a dead horse. I'm talking about a dead daughter, 776 00:38:43,553 --> 00:38:45,612 and that's an awful lot of weight to haul around. 777 00:38:45,642 --> 00:38:47,315 You are harshing my buzz. 778 00:38:47,345 --> 00:38:49,412 Oh, I don't want to harsh. I want to help. 779 00:38:49,442 --> 00:38:52,534 Help me, help you carry the weight. 780 00:38:52,564 --> 00:38:54,427 Oh, Lily, unburden yourself. 781 00:38:54,678 --> 00:38:56,833 If Charlotte were alive right now 782 00:38:56,863 --> 00:38:59,557 and you didn't have to worry about Vivian settling your hash, 783 00:39:00,176 --> 00:39:01,854 what would you say to her? 784 00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:04,644 Is this the role-play part where you're supposed to be Charlotte? 785 00:39:04,748 --> 00:39:06,996 Yes, aunt Lily. It's Charlotte. Don't you recognize me? 786 00:39:07,026 --> 00:39:08,576 You should get your eye checked. 787 00:39:11,373 --> 00:39:14,155 Charlotte, there's something you should know. 788 00:39:19,138 --> 00:39:20,128 I'm listening. 789 00:39:21,901 --> 00:39:22,914 I'm your mother. 790 00:39:23,270 --> 00:39:24,082 Presto. 791 00:39:25,754 --> 00:39:26,751 Go on. 792 00:39:26,968 --> 00:39:28,786 Ask your sea of questions. 793 00:39:32,127 --> 00:39:33,255 She can hear me? 794 00:39:40,506 --> 00:39:41,506 There's so many. 795 00:39:42,535 --> 00:39:44,917 - I want to know everything. - I want to know every... 796 00:39:45,093 --> 00:39:46,237 everything? 797 00:39:47,134 --> 00:39:48,331 Everything. 798 00:39:49,228 --> 00:39:50,634 Start at the beginning. 799 00:39:50,810 --> 00:39:53,486 Tell me about the... the day I was born. 800 00:39:53,951 --> 00:39:55,947 Could you tell me about the day I was born? 801 00:39:59,405 --> 00:40:00,989 I was at the nunnery. 802 00:40:01,019 --> 00:40:03,371 It was right in the middle of mid-middle morning prayers. 803 00:40:04,258 --> 00:40:07,286 Sister Mary Mary came running with a crucifix and a bucket of holy water. 804 00:40:07,316 --> 00:40:10,211 She had ideas about the kind of spawn I was carrying. 805 00:40:10,810 --> 00:40:11,946 But... 806 00:40:15,009 --> 00:40:16,303 after you were born... 807 00:40:20,850 --> 00:40:23,516 even she could see you were an angel. 808 00:40:26,329 --> 00:40:28,616 As the once-dead girl named Chuck 809 00:40:28,646 --> 00:40:32,983 had her very first conversation with the mother she'd always thought dead 810 00:40:33,560 --> 00:40:35,654 and felt her heart grow full... 811 00:40:43,460 --> 00:40:44,762 across town, 812 00:40:44,792 --> 00:40:49,083 Dwight Dixon was visiting the dead daughter of his dead friend... 813 00:40:56,722 --> 00:40:58,885 and found her coffin... 814 00:40:59,186 --> 00:41:00,022 empty. 815 00:41:10,812 --> 00:41:12,842 Synchro: Salomon & Gaillots 816 00:41:13,919 --> 00:41:15,610 Rereading: Bruno & Toupack