Pushing Daisies - Season 02 Episode 13 "Kerplunk"
Subtitles (BIA v.1.00): A²S Team --==All-about-Subs.fr==--
At this very moment in the town of Coeur d'Louise,
young Lily Charles was 5 years, 16 hours and 2 minutes old.
Three days earlier, her sister Vivian was born with a hole in her heart.
Cardiologists patched the flaw and Lily received her orders,
put her vulnerable sibling before herself.
On her 11th birthday, land-loving Lily was given a backyard pool
and a swimming suit that matched her sister Vivian's.
Lily would soon realize that constant exposure to her younger sister
made Vivian a devoted mimic.
From matching swimsuits and backyard poolery,
The Darling Mermaid Darlings were born.
The renowned synchronized swimming sisters were loyal beyond separation
until Charles Charles.
Engaged to sister Vivian, but in love with sister Lily,
Charles Charles not only planted the seeds of betrayal, he sowed them.
Shamed by the affair with her sister's fiancé,
Lily joined the Sisters of the Divine Magnatum
where she hid her love child from Vivian and the world.
No sooner was Lily's lovechild born
than Lily had to give her up to keep the secret.
Somewhere between losing her daughter and losing her eye,
Lily lost the will to perform.
Lily's daughter, Charlotte, was raised by her father
and told her mother died giving birth.
When Charlotte's father died, her mother came back into her life,
but not as her mother,
as her aunt.
Incapacitated by the lie, she was forced to keep telling,
Lily retreated from the world
and took Vivian and Charlotte with her.
And then, Charlotte died.
At this very moment, Lily and Vivian were commemorating a birthday,
specifically a half birthday for their niece/daughter Charlotte,
who passed away one and one half birthdays ago.
She was such a happy girl.
It's as if when she died, the merriment in this home died with her.
Good Lord!
Sorry for being dismal.
It would be a relief to be as strong and stoic as you.
Dear me. The Aquacade is in town!
Remember taking Charlotte there for her half birthdays?
It's as if an angel called the Papen County Picayune
and placed an ad on the back page.
You done gawking? The bird cages need fresh liners.
Lily, let's go to the Aquacade.
It could be just the thing to help the gloom pass. Please. For me.
Though Lily was weak with grief, her compulsion
to put her sister's happiness before her own drove her to say
Find my opera gloves.
All those children, tourists and culottes,
the place will be crawling with germs.
And so Vivian made a wish.
I can't believe you remembered my half birthday.
- How could we forget? - You never shutting up about it.
A little something from me.
The first edition.
And it's signed by the author! Thank you, Emerson.
Now, where's yours, boyfriend of half birthday girl?
- Ned thinks he's a terrible gift-giver. - I am.
He's obsessed with finding the gift that doesn't exist.
- It does. - Then he psychs himself out
to the point where he doesn't gift anything,
but he's already given me the greatest gift of all, my life back.
Still, I'm not giving up finding the perfect gift.
What died?
Half a dozen minks, give or take.
Lily asked me to take them to the furrier for a fluffing.
They're going to the Aquacade tonight to celebrate Chuck's half birthday.
I'm so touched!
- Aren't you touched, Ned? - I'm not sure. What's an Aquacade?
It's like this travelling water show and you have divers and swimmers
and breathtaking daredevils.
That was I can't tell on my half birthday
and we'd always go.
That's it, my perfect gift.
I'm gonna buy six tickets to the Aquacade.
- Call Simone. - In with the flu.
- Olive, call Randy. - Out with the gout.
- So, four tickets to the Aquacade. - Double date! Double date!
Prepare to be amazed.
There has not been this much talent around a body of water
since Moses played the Red Sea.
But first master of ceremonies is the son Jimmy Neptune!
And solo sensation Sid Tango!
Shark rider Galveston Gus and his dorsal finned friend Bubba!
And your aunts.
They're the Serena and Venus of water ballet and no-one's looking?
No-one's even pretending not to look when you're actually looking.
But someone was.
The Darling Mermaid Darlings.
Look, fans.
No, they are not fans. They're the Aqua Dolls.
The facts were these.
Blanche and Coral Ramora aka the Aqua Dolls,
shaped their act into a swimming celebration of the red, white and blue.
But the Aqua Dolls weren't the only synchronized sister duo,
the Darling Mermaid Darlings were too, and thus, grew a bitter rivalry.
- What has you two chumming the waters? - I could ask the same, chum.
The Charles sisters. Still out of the loop.
How quaint and refreshing.
We're tonight's headliners, didn't you know?
Yo, dolls.
This is our manager, Blanche's husband.
Insatiable husband. Shane Trickle.
I found him when we were performing in Honolulu.
Hawaii.
Shake tail. Curtains in 20.
Well, off to do what we do best...
Swim for Christ and country.
You might wanna pick a new flag, one without horizontal stripes.
You know, it's a shame cutting this short.
- Why don't we meet in our dressing... - Lavish dressing room, after the show.
That's if the shuttle bus isn't in a hurry to get you back to the home.
This was an unanticipated stress. I would like to go.
You think I wanted to drive 25 miles to a...
family-friendly venue with its general admission parking lot?
They don't even serve alcohol here!
Oh, my goodness. You need to sit down at home?
No, we are gonna stand up.
Come on, this is Charlotte's celebration.
Her memory comes first.
Get out your ticket. We're wading in.
They look rattled.
This is the worst that could've happened.
I'm gonna have to sneak closer and see how they're dealing with everything.
The cotton candy vendor's a very large man with a doubly large...
display of spun candy to hide behind.
I have to do something. What can I do from all the way back up here?
I know! Let's lift their spirits with an aunt chant or the wave.
It's never been more appropriate. Emerson, you start.
Or something more to the point.
Screw the Aqua Dolls!
I got a smile.
Greetings, ladies and gents!
Welcome to my Night of a Thousand Bubbles!
Is this a frothy crowd or what?
Bubble the shark thinks so!
More from him later.
Thanks for insisting we stay. Now the task is staying strong.
But right now, let us rise...
for our National Anthem...
as interpreted by those patriotic paddlers:
the Aqua Dolls.
Oh say can you see...
these ladies swim?
Esther Williams would piss her cotton panel
at the sight of those rocket splits.
Lily, behave.
Though I will admit Blanche is looking less than buoyant.
Are you kidding? She's dead in the water.
I must pen a sympathy note to Coral Ramora.
Don't sign my name to that
"Sorry a shark ate your bitch of a sister" letter.
- She wouldn't think twice if it was us. - But to have a sister die.
I don't know how I'd survive if I lost you.
Who the hell is that?
Vivian Charles of the Darling Mermaid Darlings.
Tails, scales and all.
I overheard your verbal skirmish with the Aqua Dolls last night.
Hoped to grab you after the show, but it seemed you were swept away by....
departing crowd.
We small-boned persons are vulnerable
to exoduses of the mass and panicked variety.
We all thought the Charles sisters had gone the way of legend,
but gee whizz.
- What a time for a comeback. - Come again?
My father owned the Aquacade before me, his father before him.
That's how I know Sam Neptune gave the Darlings their first break.
As a boy,
I watched your set from the water wings every night
and I never forgot the look of the audience as they soaked it in.
You two have a gift unlike any I've seen.
- Your swimming brings people joy. - Our swimming brings...
brought us joy too.
I'm in desperate need of a new opening act.
Come back to the pool, Mermaids!
After a 24 hour mourning period for poor Blanche, of course.
- The water's nice. - We're retired.
People come out of retirement all the time.
For how many performances would you want us?
What has gotten into your gills?
- We had our time. - And here it is, back again.
Well, are we swimmin', women?
Save it. We're in training.
- Do I smell a fish-wich? - Yes.
- You mind stowin' it away? - Yes.
All clear.
Sorry to inconvenience, but the scent of fried flounder takes me back to...
my recent loss.
You come highly recommended, Mr Cod.
- The name's... - Galveston Gus. I know.
I assume your recent loss is Bubba the shark?
- You heard? - I was there.
I hope you ain't part of the negligence suit against me.
Their lawyers wanna take everything I have,
and that's why I need you, to prove I wasn't asleep in the saddle.
Not much I can do.
300 people saw your great white make fish food out of that water hoofer.
I know you can't prove Bubba didn't eat Miss Ramora, he did,
and what a crap last meal that must've been.
But you can prove someone else at the Aquacade
let him out of his pen and caused this horrible accident.
What's got you floating that theory?
I triple check the gate of his paddock before every performance.
This here is the only way to open it
and it never leaves my person.
No, sir.
Someone else opened his pen and set me and my boy up.
Bubba was my best friend ever since he was a guppy of a pup.
And the only happiness I will get from this mess is knowing his name is clear.
So please,
help a sentimental cow-boo guy.
In third grade, I did a report on great whites.
It's gonna be a like-a-likes,
seeing as how we're both misunderstood bad asses.
- Well, this may be a long shot, but... - Let's give the big fish a fair shake.
Miss Ramora, I'm sorry to inform you, you've been eaten by Bubba the shark.
Did everybody cry? Of course they did. I'm the fan fav'.
Did you notice anything strange before...
My sister asked me if I was going grey.
- How about something pertinent? - It's strange.
My mother was auburn till the end.
Only other thing that can bring on grey hair is stress
and my husband Shane is the biggest stress reliever I know.
Big-gest.
I can see something white in there, but I don't think it's hair.
- It's my hair gel. - You sure that ain't shark slime?
Water ballerinas use a very thick hair gel.
It's water proof to keep hairstyles in place. It's kinda like shellac.
Shellac with a faint scent of...
lard.
It's used all the time in pie crusts.
Why would someone put pig fat in her hair gel?
Sharks can smell a drop of blood in the water a quarter of a mile away.
Lard sure as hell would've prompted Bubba to strike.
All someone would have to do is open the pen.
We've got bonified murder by great white.
Wait.
Lily and Vivian Charles.
I knew there was a reason they'd come out of seclusion after all these years.
Shrews. Always after our limelight.
You were the limelight. You were nothing before the Mermaids.
They put sibling synchro swim dance on the map.
- Who are you? - Charlotte Charles.
Niece of Vivian, daughter of Lily.
You hurt their feelings on a night they were feeling very fragile, so...
you can just shut up about my family, Blanche Ramora Trickle,
or you'll end up...
Well, I can't think of anything worse than here, so...
Snap! Now, touch her. Touch her before she talks back.
Touch her! Touch her! Touch her!
That felt so good.
That hapless shark was just a patsy?
He got a whiff of lard in Blanche's hair gel
and followed his instincts.
The killer would have needed access to the Dolls' dressing room
and the remote for the shark gate, all of which hollers inside job.
Suddenly, our Aquacade looks nastier than a backed-up sink on Thanksgiving.
There's no way our bad fish is gonna nibble with a bunch of PIs
coming trawling for murderers.
What we need now is a cover.
- My aunts! - Lily. Vivian. A booth? Pie?
Pie and booth?
Perhaps a sugar-free apricot custard to go.
You are all really co-ordinated today.
Olive, we'd like back the Darling Mermaid Darling costumes
we gave you some time ago.
- Feeling nostalgic? - No.
We're joining the floating cast of Jimmy Neptune's Night of a Thousand Bubbles.
This is our living in sync practice hour.
OMG!
GR8!
TTFN. No. BRB.
She got a case of the dumbA-S-S.
How about you take a seat far over there where you can...
do whatever it is you're doing?
Well, ladies, if it isn't a small sea.
It just so happens I have business at Jimmy Neptune's myself.
Would you mind stepping outside for a little chat?
After you.
No stares of disbelief, I beg you.
I couldn't pass up an all-access-pass for the Aquacade.
It may be all access, unfortunately, it's not all inclusive.
I know, I can't go. But I don't care cause they're back in the water for pay.
But I want you there taking photos
and making notes and then reporting back to me.
It doesn't seem fair, like we're on Spring Break
- while you're stuck in detention. - This detention's easier 'cause...
they're surrounded by people who love them
in this very emotional and vulnerable time.
You just make sure that Emerson is a vigilant bodyguard
and sticks to them like glue.
Paddle out.
Dipping a toe back in our old lives...
and solving a murder. The thought brings tingles.
All right, everybody. Here's your assignments.
Itty-Bitty, you're hair and make-up.
I want you to get into Blanche's dressing room
and find that hair gel.
Pie maker, you're the deal maker, aka the Mermaids' agent.
Stick to Jimmy Neptune.
As team coach, I'll sidle up to the Aqua Dolls' manager
and grieving husband, Shane Trickle.
And as team heavy, I'll also make sure you two have nothing to worry about
except scissor kicking ass and taking names.
Aqua Troops, circle round for an important announcement.
As terrible as these circumstances are,
they've also brought us something wonderful.
A pair of luminaries.
Everyone, put your fins together
for A Night of a Thousand Bubbles' new headliners...
The Darling Mermaid Darlings.
That's bogus, Neptune!
We have a signed thing.
Which I will honor by finding a new act for Coral.
Does anybody even know who these two are?
I met my husband at a Darling Mermaid Darlings show.
They're the reason we devote our lives to this.
I have pens for autographs.
I ought to punch you in the snot locker!
As Lily and Vivian's stars began to rise,
Olive encountered another star that was about to fall.
- Are you the new sea horse? - Heavens to hamstrings.
No. I'm Sally Boots. Fly girl to the Darling Mermaid Darlings.
Snap that G-string! I love them.
I love you.
Mama.
- Who are you? - Sid Tango.
- I open the second act. - Why aren't you out there?
They're relocating me.
- Out by the porta-lights. - Shoot.
There's enough room in this fishbowl for all us fish.
You know what? Thank you.
If only more people around here would be as accepting of who I am.
People aren't accepting here?
Being a man in aqua entertainment...
Which is to say unappreciated and invisible.
Do you know how many times Jimmy promised me the headliner spot?
Thought I'd get it after Blanche kicked.
Then I hear they're dragging the musty mermaids out of retirement.
Oh, hell. Some day it'll be my turn.
Until then, I'll be content watching others...
glimmer and gleam.
Ironically, Olive found those same words staring back at her
from the vicinity of Coral's dressing table.
She'd mind if I borrow this?
My girls need a touch-up before splash-down. Nice to meet you. Bye.
I combed the dressing room for the weapon.
Well, murder weapon trigger.
Blanche's beauty area had been broomed, but I did found Coral's hair gel.
It smells fine.
Nice work, Sea-Wee.
I got a great big bucket full of nothing.
Still, your find does prove our theory.
Blanche was definitely the target.
Holy Ibiza, Monaco and St Tropez. That is some banana hammock.
That's Sid Tango. I found him hanging in Blanche's dressing room.
He's sort of fun and just a teensy bit angry
he was overlooked to lead the Aquacade due to his...
Well, because of...
- what's in his banana hammock. - I really should look away, but I...
- I can't. - Wanna go blind?
I wanna catch a killer. Look at the shark pen.
See that?
It happens every time Sid touches his belt.
Come on.
Excuse me. This is where I dive.
Well, you're about to belly flop, all right...
... right into a little cesspool I like to call the county pen.
- What do you want, Tango? - You.
- To get me out of here. - Life on the inside rough?
I'll call in a favor to the warden. Maybe he can ease up a little.
What? He's a regular.
Sometimes I serve his pecan pie with an extra scoop of caramel sauce,
complimentary like.
This was a frame job! I had nothing to do with killing Blanche.
Why would I keep the murder weapon in my Speedo?
Why don't you say that and do a dance for the judge, Tango?
You had opportunity and you had motive.
You told me that you were jealous of the Aqua Dolls' headliner spot.
My jealousy has nothing to do with them.
It stems from loving an art form that doesn't love me back.
Why aren't you shining your spotlight on Coral?
- It's what she's wanted all her life. - Keep splashing.
There may have been two Aqua Dolls, but it was really The Blanche Show.
She always put herself first. Coral hated her for it.
Are you thinking she got tired of living in big sissy's shadow and engineered it?
Coral launched Blanche into the direction of that shark.
It's certainly a thing to make you go...
As Emerson Cod let Sid Tango off the hook,
the private detective's suspicions side-stroked back to the Aquacade.
What's the matter with you?
I am warning you, ass.
Why don't you just take that trident and stab me in the heart?
Pack your spandex. You're fired!
Everybody, chillax. I can fix this.
Save it, centrabrains.// You're as useless as teats on a boar.
Teats.
Coral, wait!
Can you believe the claws on that sea monster?
Trying to pinch my Aquacade and turn it into a vehicle for herself!
- Talent. They're like children. - Do you know what she tried to pitch?
A one-woman tribute to a chorus line!
- Don't you need a chorus and a line? - She figured out a way around it!
The last thing I need is another water dancer.
With Galveston Gus gone, the audience is thirsting for a daredevil act.
Picture this.
A motorcycle, but it's on fire.
And there's a ramp, 20 feet high, on fire too.
- A rider appears... - Also on fire?
Better. In chains. She guns the engine,
soars off the ramp, through a hoop,
maybe flaming, maybe not. I'll have to crunch the numbers.
- and then lands on the other side. - She?
Yes, Coral or at least it was supposed to be her until I canned her.
Still, don't you think that's an act that will put butts in seats?
Absolutely and I've got another act that butts absolutely love.
Of course, The Darlings' contract.
Some sticking points, but no tsunami-sized.
- Whatever. - Yes?
I came up with stuff they don't need, to see if we could get away with it.
Charles sisters are as easy as a lazy river.
It'd be my pleasure to have them aboard, on one condition.
Great news. Jimmy agreed to all of your demands.
The fresh lilacs? The Egyptian cotton towels?
- The vodka fountain? - The papers will be ready tomorrow.
But just so you know, it all hinges on one thing.
Jimmy's gonna take the Aquacade on a European tour,
signing means you'll go.
No way! Who would take care of the birds?
Place flowers on Charlotte's grave? And besides...
Lily has indulged me enough.
- So our answer is... - Yes.
For the first time since Charlotte died,
maybe it's OK to leave sadness behind.
Start putting our happiness first.
What do you think?
I think Chuck... Charlotte,
as you described her, was a wonderful caring woman and she,
like me, would want you to put your happiness first too.
I think we're all in agreement when I say: "Swim on, Mermaids".
Oh, my... It's Coral!
Everybody stand back.
I was a lifeguard.
- Was she attacked? - We saw the whole thing.
She chained herself up, hopped on the chopper and rode it
like a Hell's Angel in drag until she fell in.
It would have been funny if it wasn't so tragic.
What the hell were you doing?
Jimmy. Is that you, Jimmy?
Yes!
I was just trying to show you that I could do it.
That daredevil act that you wanted.
I will do anything if it means getting back into the show.
Is that so wrong?
No, but let me tell you what is.
Your brother-in-law/manager's hands all over your perky/heaving boobs.
This is a certified life-saving position!
Get off me, you idiot!
I told you we were through!
For shame!
You've been doing the skinny-dip with your sister's husband!
At that moment, Lily Charles had something in common
with a lifelong enemy.
Both were adulteresses.
Both had stolen men their sisters loved.
Both were...
Disgusting.
You put the Evel in Knievel, lady.
I guess the spotlight wasn't the only thing
- you didn't wanna share with Blanche. - You just wanted Trickle's pickle
to yourself, so you fed her to the sharks!
All right.
I admit that I slept with Shane to spite my sister,
but I didn't kill her.
I loved her. And now she's gone and...
where do I turn?
To us.
Coral, you will swim with our act tonight.
What?
In the past, whenever I was incapacitated by grief,
getting back in the water was the best cure.
It will heal you. Isn't that right, Lily?
Really?
Think she's telling the truth, Cod?
Yeah. Too bad too,
'cause the jealous, crazy lady that kills her sister
to be with the himbo brother-in-law is always a welcome rest stop...
on the motive turnpike.
Maybe the rest stop's the same, just on the other side of the road.
As in the himbo did it?
Wait. Where's the himbo?
The himbo getting away with murder!
Hasta, biatches!
The police searched Shane's van. They found lard-laced hair gel
and some really specific instructions
on how to clone a remote controlled gate opener.
- The APB's already out. - How are Lily and Vivian feeling?
Very well. Now for the big news.
The Darling Mermaid Darlings... have picked up a third.
What?
- That was faked surprise. - Yeah, it was.
Olive's been keeping me informed on the Charles sister.
- How are they getting along? - Vivian's her usual, sweet self.
Lily seems cautious, but still professional.
And Coral is thrilled to have a job
that doesn't require her a flame retardant one piece.
That is just great.
Now, please, please can I open my box?
I've been waiting all day!
My second attempt half birthday gift for you to wear tomorrow night.
- I got us front row seats. - Thank you.
Ned! Killers tickets and
a top-notch tam.
Thank you.
It's the Darling Mermaid Darlings' first professional appearance in years.
There's no way you can miss it, especially now.
Here's the really...
juicy secret that not even Olive Snook the spy knows.
The Aquacade is hitting the road and Lily and Vivian are going with it.
- Road? What do you mean road? - A bunch of them, really.
Downing Street, the autobahn,
the Champs Elysees.
They're European, as in Europe.
That's right.
Didn't expect fake surprise,
but I didn't expect stunned silence either.
- How could you let this happen? - I did what you told me.
- I thought you'd be happy. - Ned, they think I'm dead!
This has been bearable because I've been keeping tabs on them.
If they needed something, I could help them or try and fix it.
While I'm completely removed, I'm still part of their lives.
And how can I be part of their lives if they're in Europe?
- This is a game changer. - What game?
- This is not a game. - No, it's not a game. It's my life.
And now you decided to modify the rules,
I've gotta re-evaluate which ones actually keep me here.
I'll just sit here and try to concentrate on not throwing up.
Butterflies making you queasy?
What say we drown them with a dip in the vodka fountain?
I never drink and dive.
It's disrespectful to the audience,
more importantly, to Vivian.
Where is she?
Meeting with the sound tech.
The underwater speaker sounded muddy in rehearsal.
Well, let's hope they solve it by show time.
Coral had slept with her own sister's husband.
Lily had done the same with her sister's fiancé.
The symmetry made her feel as if she were looking
at a reflection of herself.
And since herself was what she hated most,
she rejected the mirror.
Say, what is our choreography at measure 120 again?
Are we reverse craning into a ballet leg thrust?
- Full corkscrew first. - I thought the corkscrew came last.
Hold it. That's right, which makes you wrong.
The corkscrew comes last. You're losing it, Lil.
I think I'll have that nip after all.
- Sure? - Hey, short round.
A little help with my bun.
- You've got something poking out. - Leave it!
Sorry, but when I see a string, I just...
- I have to yank it! - Hey!
Holy gold lamé!
You're trying to be a singular sensation!
You swam your way back to the Aquacade by preying on Vivian's sympathy.
You tried to break up the Darlings by stage frightening Lily
so you can rule the pool in a one-woman chorus line. Where's the top hat?
- I'm gonna shove it up your... - Olive,
excuse us.
Did you know my sister was born with a hole in her heart?
The doctors fixed it, but...
sometimes it leaks a bit and stuff gets through...
stuff like you.
Vivian may think that a woman who sleeps with her sister's husband
deserves a second chance, but I don't.
You'll always be what you are...
a selfish, conniving wretch.
The Darling Mermaid Darlings
are a team that puts each other first,
so get in your show boat...
and row it to hell.
This putting others first that you're so proud of,
I assume it didn't apply to your baby.
- I never had a baby. - That's what Vivian said.
We were just making small talk and I casually asked her
if you had a son or a daughter and she...
told me that neither of you had any children.
Isn't that strange?
The world's full of spinsters.
You know, 30 years ago, you and I
changed next to each other after a show
and the seamstress had to let out your costume,
the flippers didn't fit your feet and you had that just...
knocked up glow about you.
And then you disappeared for nine months.
So where's the kid, spinster?
And why are you hiding it from Vivian?
Breathe another word and it'll be your last!
- Now get out! - You'll regret this.
- Coral had to cancel. She's sick. - Then it's just us...
as it really should be, I suppose.
Ready?
I can't.
We've come this far.
This time, don't do it for me,
do it for you.
Meanwhile, the Darling Mermaid Darlings' one-man security detail
spied a lurking shadow.
Hell, yeah.
Which called to mind a murderous surfer named Shane.
Trickle, down on the ground!
Dead girl, don't you know there's a killer on the loose?
Think again, fool! Now, step out with your hands up!
- What are you doing here? - What are you doing here?
- I asked you first. - The person who's sneaking around
in the dark wearing a damn disguise
is usually the person with the most explaining to do.
That'd be you, dead girl.
Well, I came up here...
to get a better vantage point of Lily and Vivian swimming.
That's a lie. From my excellent vantage point in the shadows,
I saw her take their music out of the CD player.
I did not. Look, it's still in here. Look. See?
Cause I put it back in there. I feel really ashamed now. I'm so sorry.
You're also really lousy at explaining things
cause the more you talk, the more lost I get.
I was really happy for Lily and Vivian until...
their happiness threatened my happiness.
So in a moment of weakness and panic, I snook up here and I...
tried to sabotage their show in the hope that they'd stay.
Despicable.
Now you.
I guess I must have thought Chuck would try to do something rash,
so I came up here to stop her.
Here's the Pie Hole mellow mix you asked me to get out of my car.
You know what I realized on my full tilt run back up here?
First, there's a lot of steps in this place.
The second, Lily never mentioned a last minute music change.
There wasn't.
Pie boy here was gonna torpedo their performance.
How could you?
When Chuck's happiness was threatened by Lily and Vivian's happiness,
my happiness freaked out, I thought Chuck would follow them to Europe.
I'm a solo guy by nature,
but I choose to affiliate myself with the both of you.
The reason being...
'cause when you spend all your time chasing bad guys,
you want the best of the good guys in your corner.
You two normally are as solid as they come
because your moral compass is always pointed due...
the right thing.
But clearly,
someone's been screwing with both your magnetic fields
'cause the both of you seem really lost right now.
So I'm gonna help you out by personally escorting and...
them physically ejecting both of your asses from these premises.
Now, what do you think about that?
At that moment, Charlotte Charles walk of shame turned into triumph.
The beat of their happy hearts and the blare of the underwater speakers
drowned out the sound of impending doom.
I did it for you, Coral!
Nobody asked you to, Shane.
You know what's great about everyone's thinking that you're stupid?
They assume that you can't get away with murder, but I did!
You also sent a shark into the water while I was swimming.
Did you think about that, Professor?
Yes! It's why I smeared your costume
with protein secretions of the Red Sea Moses sole.
A little-known shark repellent.
Why don't you just drop the microphone there, Trickle?
I plan to... in the pool!
Because the cord will shoot out a current through the water
and electrocute the Darlings.
Once Lily and Vivian Charles are dead, Jimmy will finally have
to make you the star of the show. And that's all you ever wanted.
- Now I get it. - Look at me, Coral!
It's all for you!
Dang!
With the victory of the previous night faded in the light of a conversation
- that had to be had. - Morning.
I hope that gift's not for me. My half birthday is over.
The gifts I gave you before only triggered crisis and misery.
Really? I hadn't noticed.
Give this one a shot?
I don't remember this picture. I remember the day, but
not the shot.
Because I took it with my junior instamatic.
It was the first time I met your aunts.
They were buzzing through town
on their way to some far-off and fantastic place.
I had almost forgotten those aunts, so...
thank you for reminding me.
Chuck, I tried very hard to be a good boyfriend.
I believe that every day, even in the smallest ways,
I try to put your happiness before my own.
Yeah, I agree with that whole-heartedly.
I've been lying to you,
not that it's any kind of excuse,
but I think it's because I've been lying to myself too.
If Lily and Vivian knew you were still alive
the only person in danger would be me.
The danger itself is a lie.
It's irrational fear in danger's clothing.
It's whispering, "Chuck loves her mother and aunt
so much she wouldn't want to spend her life with you if she...
could be with them."
And so I put my happiness first and...
told everyone that no-one could know that you're alive again,
especially Lily and Vivian Charles.
- You didn't know what you were doing. - I do now.
And now...
I'm finally putting your happiness before my own.
At this very moment, a life event was taking place.
Lily Charles had begun to experience feelings that had become foreign.
These pleasant sensations...
were not to last.
Coral and I...
just had an illuminating conversation,
one that helped me put together the pieces of a 30-year-old mystery.
There was a part of me that always knew,
but I wouldn't allow myself to entertain such horrid thoughts
that my beloved sister
would go behind my back
with my fiancé
and have a child.
It was Charlotte, wasn't it?
I tried thousands of times to tell you,
but I couldn't find a way to do it.
Why do you think I hid from the world?
I was so ashamed I couldn't bear to have anyone look at me.
I understand. I can't bear to look at you either.
I took the liberty of calling you a cab.
Where am I supposed to go?
Anywhere but here.
You know, I have spent half a lifetime trying to make amends.
I gave up the only man I have ever loved,
as well as my beautiful baby daughter,
because I knew the truth would break your heart.
So I broke mine instead.
I did what I have done since the day you were born...
chose your happiness over mine.
You don't have to anymore.
All right!
At that very moment, time stopped, as it is one to do
when present, past and future collide.
When one's existence ceases
to be measured in days, hours and minutes,
but instead in the immeasurable quantity of life events.
For Lily and Vivian Charles, the reappearance of a daughter and niece
was a life event that would eventually overshadow
a 30-year-old betrayal
and result in a splash of water,
the roar of the crowd and a whirlwind tour
around the world... twice.
Private investigator Emerson Cod would experience a life event
when life found him through the pages of a pop-up book
and he was reunited with his own Little Gum Shoe.
I'm looking for Emerson Cod.
Jockey-cum-waitress-cum private investigator Olive Snook
would experience two life events in quick succession.
The first, opening her heart to a formerly friendless taxidermist
and the second, by opening a culinary palace dedicated
to the art of macaroni and cheese called The Intrepid Cow.
For the pie maker and the dead girl named Chuck,
their shared life event began with a touch
and became the promise of a new family, brought about
- by the words... - I'm alive.
At that moment, in the town of Coeur d'Coeurs,
events occurred that are not, were not
and should never be considered an ending.
For endings, as it is known, are where we begin.
Synchro: Salomon & Gaillots Rereading: Bruno & Toupack
Subtitles: A²S Team --==All-about-Subs.fr==--
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