1
00:00:00,024 --> 00:00:02,072
What a ride indeed, Barb!
2
00:00:02,481 --> 00:00:04,315
Oh, let me first assure
your viewers
3
00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:07,159
that... not a single crow
was harmed,
4
00:00:07,251 --> 00:00:08,351
and as for the humans,
5
00:00:08,436 --> 00:00:10,869
oh, nothing but a little
wounded pride...
6
00:00:11,075 --> 00:00:12,902
and one severed earlobe.
7
00:00:12,987 --> 00:00:14,564
- Oh!
- Ouch!
8
00:00:14,649 --> 00:00:16,710
- Yeah!
- Yes, everything you saw
9
00:00:16,795 --> 00:00:18,599
was part of a carefully
orchestrated,
10
00:00:18,684 --> 00:00:20,819
entirely deliberate stunt.
11
00:00:20,904 --> 00:00:23,458
Oh, well, it seems
to have worked, Moira.
12
00:00:23,543 --> 00:00:26,078
With over more than
2 million views
13
00:00:26,163 --> 00:00:28,255
in less than 24 hours,
14
00:00:28,372 --> 00:00:31,991
this video has created an
incredible buzz for the movie,
15
00:00:32,076 --> 00:00:34,335
which, as of right now,
16
00:00:34,419 --> 00:00:37,551
is officially trending
on Interflix.
17
00:00:37,636 --> 00:00:38,778
It is?!
18
00:00:39,438 --> 00:00:41,443
Well, if you're saying
it's a smash hit,
19
00:00:41,528 --> 00:00:44,382
then I'm just going to have
to take your word for it.
20
00:00:44,473 --> 00:00:46,521
As well as the word
of millions of streamers
21
00:00:46,605 --> 00:00:48,610
across the internet, I suppose.
22
00:00:48,694 --> 00:00:51,017
You know, the brilliant thing
about being on streaming
23
00:00:51,102 --> 00:00:53,916
is that one can start
the movie at any point,
24
00:00:54,001 --> 00:00:55,526
any time they like.
25
00:00:55,611 --> 00:00:58,052
You know, Moira,
I think it's safe to say
26
00:00:58,152 --> 00:00:59,621
you are officially back
27
00:00:59,706 --> 00:01:01,425
- in the game! -
- Yes!
28
00:01:01,510 --> 00:01:03,244
Well, you heard it here
first!
29
00:01:03,329 --> 00:01:05,317
Do not adjust your sets!
30
00:01:06,582 --> 00:01:07,971
Excuse me, but I'd be remiss
31
00:01:08,056 --> 00:01:11,418
if I didn't acknowledge
my daughter, Alexis Rose.
32
00:01:12,767 --> 00:01:16,587
This whole PR coup d'état never
would've happened without her.
33
00:01:16,672 --> 00:01:18,209
Honestly, we just had fun
with it.
34
00:01:18,294 --> 00:01:19,322
Can't hear you.
35
00:01:19,407 --> 00:01:20,848
Poor dear's not mic'd.
36
00:01:20,933 --> 00:01:23,339
Well, looks like
there's no stopping you two now!
37
00:01:23,424 --> 00:01:25,080
Congratulations!
Hmhm.
38
00:01:25,550 --> 00:01:27,089
- Thank you!
- Thank you!
39
00:01:27,684 --> 00:01:30,356
*SCHITT'S CREEK*
Season 06 Episode 06
40
00:01:30,441 --> 00:01:32,588
*SCHITT'S CREEK*
Episode Title: "The Wingman"
41
00:01:35,008 --> 00:01:37,187
Gentlemen. Morning.
42
00:01:37,272 --> 00:01:40,223
I believe you've met
my roommate, Bob.
43
00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:42,385
- Roommate?
- Mm-hmm.
44
00:01:42,967 --> 00:01:44,452
Yeah.
Uh, Ronnie's been nice enough
45
00:01:44,536 --> 00:01:46,019
to let me stay in her
guest room,
46
00:01:46,104 --> 00:01:47,683
ever since Gwen...
47
00:01:49,097 --> 00:01:50,185
took the house.
48
00:01:50,312 --> 00:01:53,943
Yeah. And as much as I'm
enjoying the slumber party,
49
00:01:54,070 --> 00:01:57,019
I really think that Bob could
use a change of scenery.
50
00:01:57,104 --> 00:01:59,383
Maybe he could crash here
for a night...
51
00:01:59,670 --> 00:02:00,993
or six?
52
00:02:01,252 --> 00:02:03,484
- Uh, yeah...
- I don't think we, uh,
53
00:02:03,569 --> 00:02:06,003
we have any clean rooms
available.
54
00:02:06,088 --> 00:02:08,478
Oh, I... I don't mind
a dirty room.
55
00:02:08,563 --> 00:02:12,026
I hope that doesn't sound
as sad as...
56
00:02:12,192 --> 00:02:13,788
as it feels.
57
00:02:13,948 --> 00:02:16,245
Bob, why,
why don't you take a seat?
58
00:02:16,330 --> 00:02:18,658
And grab some water
while you're at it,
59
00:02:18,743 --> 00:02:22,141
'cause you should really
hydrate after all that crying.
60
00:02:22,296 --> 00:02:24,562
Gwen used to love water.
61
00:02:32,127 --> 00:02:34,157
Okay, I feel badly for Bob,
62
00:02:34,241 --> 00:02:35,582
but it's not a good look
63
00:02:35,667 --> 00:02:37,734
to have him wallowing
around here.
64
00:02:37,819 --> 00:02:39,684
Well, where do you
want the guy to wallow?
65
00:02:39,768 --> 00:02:42,296
I mean, Johnny,
there's plenty of sad people
66
00:02:42,380 --> 00:02:43,749
staying at this motel.
67
00:02:43,834 --> 00:02:47,041
That's not exactly how I'd
describe our guests, Roland.
68
00:02:47,126 --> 00:02:48,824
Well, I'm just saying,
maybe he could meet
69
00:02:48,908 --> 00:02:50,662
a fellow wallower here?
70
00:02:50,747 --> 00:02:53,174
Oh, it'd be really nice
if Bob could meet somebody
71
00:02:53,259 --> 00:02:54,173
'cause from what I hear,
72
00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:56,430
Gwen isn't exactly sitting
at home.
73
00:02:56,559 --> 00:02:58,303
Or, what if...
74
00:02:58,790 --> 00:03:01,585
we take Bob out for the evening
75
00:03:02,035 --> 00:03:04,112
and kind of act
as his wingmen
76
00:03:04,423 --> 00:03:06,521
Johnny, you know,
the whole dating scene
77
00:03:06,606 --> 00:03:08,863
has kind of changed a little
since you were single.
78
00:03:09,424 --> 00:03:11,217
First off,
we now have electricity.
79
00:03:13,359 --> 00:03:16,013
Okay, all right,
are you in or not?
80
00:03:16,098 --> 00:03:18,331
Ooh, I'm in. 'Cause I don't
wanna miss a chance
81
00:03:18,416 --> 00:03:20,331
to see how this plays out.
82
00:03:21,096 --> 00:03:23,734
- Bob?
- Well, it... it would be so nice
83
00:03:23,819 --> 00:03:28,297
to not be completely alone
for a night.
84
00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:29,821
Uh, lucky Gwen,
85
00:03:29,906 --> 00:03:32,579
she has another one of her
male cousins visiting.
86
00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,547
- This coffee's delicious.
- Thank you.
87
00:03:39,632 --> 00:03:41,876
Yeah, it's... it's sort of
burning my hand a bit
88
00:03:41,961 --> 00:03:44,347
because I can't put it down
on anything.
89
00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:47,017
David, you know that the new
coffee table is coming today,
90
00:03:47,102 --> 00:03:48,915
and that it takes a little bit
longer
91
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:50,694
- when it's handmade.
- Handmade, yeah.
92
00:03:50,779 --> 00:03:52,194
You know what I think
you should do?
93
00:03:52,279 --> 00:03:53,879
Just come over here
and relax for a bit.
94
00:03:53,964 --> 00:03:55,762
Sit down, we could put our...
95
00:03:55,847 --> 00:03:57,323
our feet up on the...
96
00:03:58,360 --> 00:03:59,798
You happy now?
97
00:03:59,935 --> 00:04:01,314
Just do me a favour
and watch these,
98
00:04:01,398 --> 00:04:03,935
- and don't eat them.
- Mm. No guarantees.
99
00:04:05,628 --> 00:04:06,654
- Hey.
- Hey.
100
00:04:06,739 --> 00:04:08,880
- Coffee table for Patrick?
- That's me, yeah.
101
00:04:08,965 --> 00:04:10,277
You look super familiar.
102
00:04:10,362 --> 00:04:11,597
Have we ordered
from you before?
103
00:04:11,681 --> 00:04:14,018
Uh, I don't know.
I... I get a lot of orders.
104
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,975
- Do you mind if I uh...?
- Yeah, come on in.
105
00:04:16,059 --> 00:04:19,152
- Uh, it's just right there.
- Yeah.
106
00:04:19,478 --> 00:04:20,993
'Kay.
107
00:04:25,516 --> 00:04:28,505
I'm sorry, this is who made
your table?
108
00:04:28,590 --> 00:04:29,728
- David!
- Hi.
109
00:04:29,813 --> 00:04:31,811
- What're you doing here?
- Okay. Muah.
110
00:04:31,896 --> 00:04:33,344
Wow.
We're still doing that.
111
00:04:33,667 --> 00:04:36,203
Uh, this is my boyfriend's
place.
112
00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:37,393
- Fiancé.
- Fiancé.
113
00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:40,255
Yeah. Now I remember where
we met before.
114
00:04:40,340 --> 00:04:41,579
- Stevie's apartment.
- At Stevie's.
115
00:04:41,663 --> 00:04:44,196
Bingo. I'm sorry
for not remembering.
116
00:04:44,281 --> 00:04:45,806
- I meet a lot of people.
- Mm.
117
00:04:45,949 --> 00:04:47,890
That is a great sweater,
by the way.
118
00:04:48,029 --> 00:04:49,993
- It really brings out your lips.
- Okay.
119
00:04:50,192 --> 00:04:53,680
Well, thank you
for the coffee table.
120
00:04:53,765 --> 00:04:55,039
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
121
00:04:55,124 --> 00:04:57,308
I am also wearing
a sweater.
122
00:04:57,514 --> 00:04:59,782
A lot of sweat
went into this one.
123
00:05:00,937 --> 00:05:03,872
- This is one of my best pieces.
- You got great taste.
124
00:05:04,070 --> 00:05:05,701
And from the looks of it,
so does David.
125
00:05:06,278 --> 00:05:08,036
Okay.
I'm gonna go uh...
126
00:05:08,121 --> 00:05:08,980
you know,
I'm gonna check on the...
127
00:05:09,065 --> 00:05:10,274
- Perfect! Yeah.
- Pancakes.
128
00:05:10,359 --> 00:05:12,993
Say, you know what?
I was just planning on having
129
00:05:13,078 --> 00:05:14,963
a chill night in,
but if you guys are free,
130
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,915
I'd love for you to come by
for a whiskey or...
131
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,477
- Hm. O-kay.
- Whatever.
132
00:05:19,585 --> 00:05:20,771
You know...
133
00:05:21,095 --> 00:05:23,218
You know what? We'll,
we'll think about that for a sec
134
00:05:23,303 --> 00:05:25,027
- and see, and see.
- Great!
135
00:05:25,217 --> 00:05:27,205
- Hope to see you tonight.
- Okay.
136
00:05:27,372 --> 00:05:28,818
And for what it's worth,
137
00:05:29,168 --> 00:05:30,897
you guys make a beautiful
couple.
138
00:05:30,982 --> 00:05:32,338
Thank you so much.
139
00:05:39,591 --> 00:05:41,141
- What?
- No, you're just, your face
140
00:05:41,236 --> 00:05:42,782
is all red.
It's beet red.
141
00:05:42,867 --> 00:05:44,826
- It is not!
- Mm-hmm. It's flush.
142
00:05:46,648 --> 00:05:48,566
- Hey, babe!
- Hey, babe!
143
00:05:48,650 --> 00:05:50,523
Oh my God! Where are you?
Is that the ocean?
144
00:05:50,608 --> 00:05:53,258
I wish. It's a poster
of the ocean.
145
00:05:53,343 --> 00:05:55,522
'Cause I'm actually in
Stewart's dorm room right now
146
00:05:55,607 --> 00:05:57,896
because mine got evacuated
last night...
147
00:05:57,999 --> 00:06:00,249
small fire ants issue.
148
00:06:00,334 --> 00:06:02,426
Yikes!
Hope everything's okay.
149
00:06:02,511 --> 00:06:05,447
It was a real "Fyre Fest."
150
00:06:05,836 --> 00:06:08,502
You do not wanna see
Krista's ankles today.
151
00:06:08,708 --> 00:06:10,126
But, it's all good.
152
00:06:10,211 --> 00:06:11,597
We'll be getting our dorms
back in...
153
00:06:11,681 --> 00:06:13,069
better shape than
we left 'em.
154
00:06:13,153 --> 00:06:15,232
- Can't wait. Hm.
- Let's talk about you!
155
00:06:15,317 --> 00:06:17,074
Everyone here has been watching
your video!
156
00:06:17,186 --> 00:06:18,553
And to think
it was all fake?
157
00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:21,582
Totally fake.
Isn't that wild?
158
00:06:21,675 --> 00:06:24,205
And all of these PR agencies
from New York are calling
159
00:06:24,290 --> 00:06:25,448
to ask me
how I did it.
160
00:06:25,533 --> 00:06:26,863
How did you do it?
161
00:06:26,948 --> 00:06:28,953
Um, it's like a little bit
too complicated
162
00:06:29,038 --> 00:06:31,348
- to explain over this.
- Hi, Theodore!
163
00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:32,798
Gorgeous view!
164
00:06:32,883 --> 00:06:34,729
Hi, Mrs. Rose!
Congrats on the movie!
165
00:06:34,814 --> 00:06:37,257
That last scene where you
leap from your nest
166
00:06:37,342 --> 00:06:38,725
only to discover that
your wings
167
00:06:38,810 --> 00:06:41,401
- aren't developed enough yet...
- Oh, you're too kind.
168
00:06:41,486 --> 00:06:43,960
The Daily Mail called it
a "flap for the ages!"
169
00:06:44,052 --> 00:06:45,987
Okay, can I have my boyfriend
back now, please?
170
00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:47,293
Hm.
171
00:06:47,790 --> 00:06:48,957
Oh!
172
00:06:49,299 --> 00:06:51,281
It's Buzzfeed calling
about the 10 goriest
173
00:06:51,366 --> 00:06:53,139
Clara Mandrake accidents
from the film.
174
00:06:53,224 --> 00:06:54,789
Best we take it.
175
00:06:54,874 --> 00:06:56,792
And don't forget,
we have a conference call
176
00:06:56,877 --> 00:06:59,837
with the Interflix PR people
in a tight 15.
177
00:06:59,922 --> 00:07:00,899
- Okay.
- Wow,
178
00:07:00,983 --> 00:07:02,584
it seems like you've got
a lot going on, Alexis.
179
00:07:02,668 --> 00:07:04,435
Yes, but not too much
for you.
180
00:07:04,596 --> 00:07:05,874
No,
don't worry about me,
181
00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:08,146
you're obviously in high
demand.
182
00:07:08,559 --> 00:07:09,808
Alexis! They're asking
about co-stars.
183
00:07:09,892 --> 00:07:12,637
I can't be expected to remember
everyone I meet!
184
00:07:12,722 --> 00:07:15,250
Mm. Okay, okay.
Well, I guess I do have to go,
185
00:07:15,335 --> 00:07:16,513
but I will see you
in a few days
186
00:07:16,597 --> 00:07:17,639
and I can't wait!
187
00:07:17,724 --> 00:07:19,507
- I can't wait either.
- Alexis!
188
00:07:19,591 --> 00:07:21,030
Okay, I'm coming.
Ugh!
189
00:07:21,125 --> 00:07:22,696
- Okay, love you!
- Love you...
190
00:07:22,780 --> 00:07:24,336
Ooh!
191
00:07:29,061 --> 00:07:31,153
I don't think we're the same
size, Johnny.
192
00:07:31,463 --> 00:07:34,469
I might have a trouble fitting
tissues into these pockets.
193
00:07:34,554 --> 00:07:36,027
Oh, you won't need tissues.
194
00:07:36,112 --> 00:07:37,588
There'll be no crying tonight,
Bob.
195
00:07:37,672 --> 00:07:39,538
You look like
a million bucks.
196
00:07:39,623 --> 00:07:41,771
Well, actually, Bob,
in Johnny's suit there,
197
00:07:41,856 --> 00:07:43,605
you look like a guy
who had a million bucks,
198
00:07:45,501 --> 00:07:46,692
Very funny, Roland.
199
00:07:46,855 --> 00:07:48,469
Now,
the suit works, Bob.
200
00:07:48,657 --> 00:07:51,359
Bob, in my experience,
201
00:07:51,444 --> 00:07:53,474
it doesn't matter
what you wear.
202
00:07:53,558 --> 00:07:55,606
It's all about being yourself.
203
00:07:55,690 --> 00:07:56,999
I think the last person
204
00:07:57,083 --> 00:07:58,827
Bob wants to be right now
is himself.
205
00:07:58,911 --> 00:08:00,200
I agree with Roland.
206
00:08:00,358 --> 00:08:02,648
I don't know if I can speak
on behalf of women here...
207
00:08:02,733 --> 00:08:03,929
You can't.
208
00:08:04,014 --> 00:08:06,356
Moira used to say,
when she was single,
209
00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:08,140
she would always be attracted
to men
210
00:08:08,224 --> 00:08:10,012
who could make her laugh.
211
00:08:10,097 --> 00:08:11,629
How'd she end up
with you?
212
00:08:12,946 --> 00:08:15,233
All right, why don't we try
a little test run here.
213
00:08:15,318 --> 00:08:17,946
Let's imagine
we're in a bar.
214
00:08:18,031 --> 00:08:20,544
Ronnie, do you wanna be the
woman in this little scenario?
215
00:08:20,629 --> 00:08:23,644
- Not a chance.
- Okay. Mm!
216
00:08:23,728 --> 00:08:26,506
Move over. I...
will be the woman.
217
00:08:26,591 --> 00:08:28,291
Okay.
So we're in a bar
218
00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:31,512
and, uh, you see this very
intriguing looking gentleman.
219
00:08:31,751 --> 00:08:33,497
Okay.
220
00:08:33,969 --> 00:08:35,971
Hello, I'm...
221
00:08:36,478 --> 00:08:38,004
- I'm Gwen.
- Oh...
222
00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:39,911
- You had to pick Gwen?
- I'm sorry,
223
00:08:39,995 --> 00:08:41,494
I saw Bob standing there
224
00:08:41,579 --> 00:08:43,134
and that was the first name
I thought of.
225
00:08:43,218 --> 00:08:45,435
- They're always together.
- Okay. Hold it together.
226
00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:47,036
- Pick another name!
- Okay, all right.
227
00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:49,514
Uh... okay, yeah.
228
00:08:50,289 --> 00:08:52,823
Hi. I'm Ronnie.
229
00:08:52,964 --> 00:08:54,493
- That's my friend Gwen.
- Oh...
230
00:08:54,578 --> 00:08:56,250
Okay, this is a disaster.
231
00:08:56,335 --> 00:08:58,299
Thank you, Roland.
I'll take over from here.
232
00:08:58,384 --> 00:08:59,915
Bob, honestly,
233
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,700
You know,
just a few runs and...
234
00:09:02,024 --> 00:09:04,111
you're gonna be drowning
in phone numbers.
235
00:09:04,196 --> 00:09:06,302
No. No...
236
00:09:07,079 --> 00:09:09,409
I... I can't breathe.
237
00:09:09,681 --> 00:09:11,421
Ooh.
238
00:09:13,288 --> 00:09:16,050
You know what?
Jake did a great job with this.
239
00:09:16,162 --> 00:09:17,886
Mm-hmm.
I was just about to say
240
00:09:17,978 --> 00:09:20,530
this coffee table really
brings out your lips.
241
00:09:20,825 --> 00:09:22,552
Okay, what? I can't
compliment the guy?
242
00:09:22,637 --> 00:09:25,451
He's talented. You know, he's
like a, a one-man operation.
243
00:09:25,536 --> 00:09:27,032
Not in my experience.
244
00:09:27,117 --> 00:09:28,699
And I think it was
very nice of him
245
00:09:28,783 --> 00:09:30,266
to invite us
for drinks tonight.
246
00:09:30,350 --> 00:09:32,355
- Wasn't it?
- Yes, it was. It was very nice
247
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:33,982
and I think that we should
get back to him about it.
248
00:09:34,066 --> 00:09:37,272
About going to his place
for "a whiskey or whatever"?
249
00:09:37,357 --> 00:09:39,057
David, I'm fine to have
drinks
250
00:09:39,141 --> 00:09:41,364
- with one of your exes, okay?
- Okay, first of all,
251
00:09:41,448 --> 00:09:43,867
Jake is nobody's ex
and everybody's ex.
252
00:09:43,952 --> 00:09:46,751
And second of all,
going to Jake's for a drink
253
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:49,590
is never just going
to Jake's for a drink.
254
00:09:49,675 --> 00:09:51,621
Oh... oh. So you...
255
00:09:51,985 --> 00:09:54,595
okay, so you think he invited
us over to... to...?
256
00:09:54,679 --> 00:09:57,144
- Yes, I do. Yeah.
- Yeah.
257
00:09:57,229 --> 00:09:59,013
Well, in that case,
we definitely shouldn't go.
258
00:09:59,097 --> 00:10:01,289
'Cause we're not really
the kind of couple that...
259
00:10:01,384 --> 00:10:03,316
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah...
260
00:10:03,696 --> 00:10:05,606
That being said,
261
00:10:05,842 --> 00:10:07,561
if we ever did decide to...
262
00:10:09,195 --> 00:10:11,481
have "a whiskey" with someone,
263
00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:13,859
Jake would be the person
to do that with
264
00:10:13,944 --> 00:10:16,384
because he literally doesn't
care about anything.
265
00:10:16,521 --> 00:10:17,949
So just...
266
00:10:18,060 --> 00:10:20,412
I'm just throwing it out there.
267
00:10:21,284 --> 00:10:23,504
I mean, we always have
the option of going
268
00:10:23,589 --> 00:10:25,759
and just having a whiskey.
269
00:10:25,894 --> 00:10:28,494
Okay. And I always have
the option of online shopping
270
00:10:28,579 --> 00:10:30,544
and just putting things
in the cart.
271
00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:32,542
That's not gonna happen.
272
00:10:34,806 --> 00:10:37,159
Um... what's all this?
273
00:10:37,414 --> 00:10:39,042
They just keep coming.
274
00:10:39,471 --> 00:10:40,936
Well, congratulations.
275
00:10:41,021 --> 00:10:42,643
That must mean everyone's
happy.
276
00:10:42,727 --> 00:10:44,253
Oh, very happy, yes.
277
00:10:44,549 --> 00:10:46,926
Thanks to your little attack
of the corvidae,
278
00:10:47,011 --> 00:10:50,009
we are Interflix's number one
stream of the day.
279
00:10:50,094 --> 00:10:51,734
Tied only with the fourth
season
280
00:10:51,819 --> 00:10:53,088
of "Caroline in the City."
281
00:10:53,471 --> 00:10:55,050
From Interflix.
282
00:10:56,618 --> 00:10:58,528
"To Alexis,
283
00:10:59,278 --> 00:11:00,886
congratulations and thank you.
284
00:11:00,971 --> 00:11:03,593
The competition is eating
crow."
285
00:11:03,752 --> 00:11:06,310
"Love, your new best friends
at Interflix."
286
00:11:08,187 --> 00:11:09,841
They're all for you.
287
00:11:11,713 --> 00:11:13,892
Not those - those are from
Joyce Dewitt.
288
00:11:14,285 --> 00:11:15,779
I didn't want to overwhelm you,
dear,
289
00:11:15,864 --> 00:11:18,314
I know you're being pulled
in another direction.
290
00:11:18,399 --> 00:11:22,507
Though, you might find a bit
more delectation in this.
291
00:11:22,592 --> 00:11:25,425
No, I do. I... I just like
haven't received flowers
292
00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:28,188
from someone I wasn't...
friends with.
293
00:11:29,894 --> 00:11:31,299
What do I do?
294
00:11:31,651 --> 00:11:33,050
What do you want to do?
295
00:11:33,135 --> 00:11:34,974
I can't leave now.
296
00:11:35,059 --> 00:11:36,348
If you're worried
about the flowers,
297
00:11:36,432 --> 00:11:37,791
they'll likely be dead
in a week.
298
00:11:37,876 --> 00:11:39,351
Yeah, like my career
if I walk away
299
00:11:39,435 --> 00:11:41,357
with everything that's
going on.
300
00:11:41,498 --> 00:11:43,242
I've already made Ted wait
an extra month.
301
00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:45,742
I can't... back out now.
302
00:11:46,155 --> 00:11:48,903
So you...
you weigh your options.
303
00:11:49,184 --> 00:11:50,843
On the one hand,
you are perched
304
00:11:50,928 --> 00:11:53,194
on the precipice
of a dream come true
305
00:11:53,529 --> 00:11:57,110
and you can jump knowing,
possibly for the first time,
306
00:11:57,213 --> 00:11:58,973
that you can succeed
at anything
307
00:11:59,058 --> 00:12:01,234
to which you put your mind.
308
00:12:01,997 --> 00:12:03,698
And on the other hand?
309
00:12:03,783 --> 00:12:06,392
- What other hand?
- Ted!
310
00:12:07,296 --> 00:12:08,550
Dear Ted.
311
00:12:08,959 --> 00:12:10,512
Yes, this is a quandary.
312
00:12:20,452 --> 00:12:23,391
Well, things seem to be
going well.
313
00:12:23,828 --> 00:12:25,980
Yeah, look, they're standing
pretty close together.
314
00:12:26,065 --> 00:12:27,379
That must be a good sign.
315
00:12:27,464 --> 00:12:28,947
Yeah, and he's not crossing
his arms.
316
00:12:29,032 --> 00:12:30,624
- That's good body language.
- And... they're hugging!
317
00:12:30,708 --> 00:12:32,147
Uh-huh.
318
00:12:32,489 --> 00:12:34,581
And... now he's walking away.
Okay.
319
00:12:34,753 --> 00:12:37,019
Well? How'd it go, Bob?
320
00:12:37,206 --> 00:12:39,168
It looked like you two
were hitting off.
321
00:12:39,252 --> 00:12:40,517
What're the odds of...
322
00:12:40,601 --> 00:12:42,522
running into my marriage
counselor here?
323
00:12:42,607 --> 00:12:44,533
I'm sorry, did you just say
324
00:12:44,618 --> 00:12:46,562
you picked up your marriage
counselor?
325
00:12:46,647 --> 00:12:47,735
No.
326
00:12:47,820 --> 00:12:50,439
I'm saying she told me
she can't keep seeing me.
327
00:12:50,524 --> 00:12:52,965
Apparently, there's a conflict
of interest
328
00:12:53,050 --> 00:12:55,711
and, uh, she's chosen to go
with Gwen.
329
00:12:55,846 --> 00:12:58,534
But... I can't blame her.
330
00:12:58,619 --> 00:12:59,858
Okay,
331
00:13:00,099 --> 00:13:02,235
can we try my system now?
332
00:13:02,488 --> 00:13:04,498
We all laugh,
on the count of three,
333
00:13:04,582 --> 00:13:06,947
as if Bob just told
a very funny joke.
334
00:13:07,032 --> 00:13:08,542
Oh, no pressure.
335
00:13:08,627 --> 00:13:10,558
Well, you don't actually
have to tell a joke, Bob.
336
00:13:10,642 --> 00:13:12,429
Just act like you did.
337
00:13:12,514 --> 00:13:16,441
And that might attract uh...
you know, someone's attention.
338
00:13:16,526 --> 00:13:17,888
What if they ask me
what I said?
339
00:13:17,973 --> 00:13:19,339
Well, they're not gonna ask
you what you said.
340
00:13:19,423 --> 00:13:20,698
I don't know, Johnny.
341
00:13:20,783 --> 00:13:22,907
This sounds like a really
complicated plan.
342
00:13:23,117 --> 00:13:25,102
- Mm-hmm.
- It couldn't be more simple.
343
00:13:25,187 --> 00:13:27,212
Just follow my lead.
344
00:13:37,958 --> 00:13:40,050
It's working.
It's working. Working.
345
00:13:40,135 --> 00:13:41,697
Is something funny?
346
00:13:41,795 --> 00:13:43,235
Well, now that you
mention it...
347
00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:44,916
Because it looked like you
were laughing at me.
348
00:13:46,406 --> 00:13:50,301
No, It's, it's just my very
available friend, Bob here,
349
00:13:50,386 --> 00:13:52,652
just said something so funny.
350
00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,375
- What'd you say?
- You said they wouldn't ask.
351
00:13:55,459 --> 00:13:57,812
Okay, I'm not saying
I'm bailing on this,
352
00:13:57,896 --> 00:14:00,883
but... I think I'm gonna go
mingle and...
353
00:14:01,137 --> 00:14:02,872
I might not come back.
354
00:14:02,957 --> 00:14:05,565
It's not so much, uh,
what he said,
355
00:14:05,650 --> 00:14:08,848
it was just, uh, it was a funny
observation.
356
00:14:09,003 --> 00:14:11,896
Well, next time,
observe someone else.
357
00:14:14,884 --> 00:14:17,150
Crrrash and burn, Johnny.
358
00:14:17,353 --> 00:14:20,576
Boy, I... I buckled
under the pressure.
359
00:14:20,802 --> 00:14:23,454
But she was a dead ringer
for Gwen.
360
00:14:28,098 --> 00:14:31,434
Oh, didn't know we were
bringing our friends tonight.
361
00:14:31,519 --> 00:14:32,830
'Kay, I knew I shouldn't have
worn this shirt.
362
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:35,065
- No, it's nice, it's nice.
- Is it new?
363
00:14:35,150 --> 00:14:36,771
And does it come in
an adult size?
364
00:14:36,856 --> 00:14:38,828
It's not new.
I just haven't worn it yet.
365
00:14:38,913 --> 00:14:41,094
- So it is new then.
- Is that cologne I smell?
366
00:14:41,179 --> 00:14:44,096
No. This is a leather-scented
body moisturizer.
367
00:14:44,310 --> 00:14:47,019
So, you... you moisturized
your body then.
368
00:14:48,234 --> 00:14:50,174
You know what?
Why don't we not do this?
369
00:14:50,258 --> 00:14:51,568
This is getting a bit
complicated.
370
00:14:51,652 --> 00:14:53,483
The only thing that's
complicated here
371
00:14:53,568 --> 00:14:54,758
is the length of your sleeves.
372
00:14:54,842 --> 00:14:56,369
Go long, go short.
Just pick one.
373
00:14:56,454 --> 00:14:59,117
Um, as for this?
If one of us wants to leave
374
00:14:59,202 --> 00:15:00,479
and the other one wants
to stay, then...
375
00:15:00,563 --> 00:15:02,786
- We both leave.
- We... both leave, yeah.
376
00:15:02,961 --> 00:15:06,868
So... I think you should knock
on the door
377
00:15:06,953 --> 00:15:09,534
because these arms are nice
and warmed up.
378
00:15:10,495 --> 00:15:11,630
All right.
379
00:15:15,909 --> 00:15:17,192
Hi, boys.
380
00:15:17,277 --> 00:15:19,235
So glad you could make it.
Come on in.
381
00:15:23,921 --> 00:15:25,362
Oh wow.
382
00:15:25,447 --> 00:15:27,800
A lot of people are here
for drinks, David.
383
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:29,191
Yeah, a few more are on
their way.
384
00:15:29,275 --> 00:15:30,888
Make yourselves at home, boys.
385
00:15:31,123 --> 00:15:32,693
- Great shirt, by the way.
- Aw.
386
00:15:32,817 --> 00:15:33,727
Mm-hmm. Thanks.
387
00:15:33,812 --> 00:15:35,181
Um...
388
00:15:36,063 --> 00:15:39,307
We left our wine in the car.
Oh.
389
00:15:39,392 --> 00:15:40,544
So we should go get that.
390
00:15:40,629 --> 00:15:42,634
Oh, don't worry about it.
Plenty of vino here.
391
00:15:42,719 --> 00:15:45,779
Yeah, it's just that ours
is um...
392
00:15:46,414 --> 00:15:47,860
- kosher.
- Mm.
393
00:15:47,945 --> 00:15:50,597
Well, hurry back. We're gonna
start the massage circle soon.
394
00:15:50,682 --> 00:15:52,861
- Oh...
- Don't wanna miss it.
395
00:15:52,946 --> 00:15:54,711
Think you're up
for the massage circle?
396
00:15:54,795 --> 00:15:56,714
- This is way too many people.
- Yeah.
397
00:15:56,799 --> 00:15:58,846
You have your coat.
We should go.
398
00:15:58,930 --> 00:16:00,630
And... Stevie?
399
00:16:00,888 --> 00:16:03,507
Oh... my God.
400
00:16:03,592 --> 00:16:05,022
Huh.
401
00:16:05,197 --> 00:16:06,680
What're you doing here?
402
00:16:06,764 --> 00:16:10,205
- What're you two doing here?
- We were...
403
00:16:10,631 --> 00:16:12,773
- We were just...
- Invited for drinks?
404
00:16:13,046 --> 00:16:14,514
I don't know what
you're talking about.
405
00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:15,684
We came here to say hi
406
00:16:15,769 --> 00:16:16,893
- and now we're leaving.
- Mmhmm.
407
00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:19,156
Can I not have one thing
for myself?
408
00:16:19,319 --> 00:16:21,802
No. Anyway,
we're gonna go.
409
00:16:21,897 --> 00:16:23,208
You gonna come with?
410
00:16:23,293 --> 00:16:26,327
Uh... I still have like...
half a drink left,
411
00:16:26,412 --> 00:16:28,005
so I think I'm gonna finish it
here, and then...
412
00:16:28,089 --> 00:16:29,239
meet you guys later?
413
00:16:29,324 --> 00:16:31,111
- No, you won't.
- No, I won't.
414
00:16:31,483 --> 00:16:33,227
- Okay.
- Have fun.
415
00:16:33,472 --> 00:16:34,835
Bye.
416
00:16:44,497 --> 00:16:46,154
Hey, sorry I'm late.
417
00:16:46,238 --> 00:16:47,547
Myrtle was laying her eggs
418
00:16:47,631 --> 00:16:48,919
and the whole team
was really excited.
419
00:16:49,003 --> 00:16:51,507
Mmm! Yeah, I bet.
Fresh omelettes.
420
00:16:51,592 --> 00:16:53,876
Well, Myrtle's a green sea
turtle,
421
00:16:53,961 --> 00:16:55,832
and they only spawn
every two years,
422
00:16:55,917 --> 00:16:58,248
so eating her eggs would
actually disrupt
423
00:16:58,333 --> 00:16:59,516
an entire ecosystem.
424
00:16:59,601 --> 00:17:01,562
Plus, there's like a ton
of cholesterol.
425
00:17:01,647 --> 00:17:04,428
Mm. Um, well, it sounds
like you're super busy,
426
00:17:04,513 --> 00:17:06,970
so I don't wanna take up
too much of your time,
427
00:17:07,055 --> 00:17:09,655
um, but I actually wanted
to talk to you about something.
428
00:17:09,740 --> 00:17:11,353
I know what you're going
to say, Alexis.
429
00:17:11,437 --> 00:17:14,042
- You do?
- I've been dropping the ball
430
00:17:14,127 --> 00:17:15,836
when it comes to our phone
dates.
431
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:18,745
Between juggling work
and, and the time difference...
432
00:17:18,830 --> 00:17:20,754
No, Ted, you haven't done
anything wrong.
433
00:17:20,944 --> 00:17:22,582
We've both been so busy
with work,
434
00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:24,497
and then on top of all of that,
you've been...
435
00:17:24,581 --> 00:17:26,778
renovating your entire
apartment for me.
436
00:17:26,863 --> 00:17:28,762
Well, I put some screens
on the windows.
437
00:17:28,846 --> 00:17:30,530
I wouldn't really call it
a renovation.
438
00:17:30,623 --> 00:17:32,222
Okay, well, you bought
a juicer.
439
00:17:33,157 --> 00:17:35,880
Um, but the more
I've been thinking about it,
440
00:17:35,991 --> 00:17:38,813
the more I feel... like...
441
00:17:38,932 --> 00:17:41,513
- I think you should stay where you are.
- Maybe I should stay here.
442
00:17:41,597 --> 00:17:43,612
Sorry, did, did you say
something?
443
00:17:43,697 --> 00:17:46,094
No. Um... What did you say?
444
00:17:46,341 --> 00:17:49,045
I can't have you come here,
Alexis. You'll hate it.
445
00:17:49,164 --> 00:17:52,033
And I'm not just saying that
because the screens that I installed
446
00:17:52,118 --> 00:17:54,989
are actually attracting
more bugs somehow.
447
00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:58,558
But you'd be leaving everything
that you're doing to come here,
448
00:17:58,643 --> 00:18:01,585
and... I can't guarantee that
there won't have another trip
449
00:18:01,670 --> 00:18:04,055
that takes me away
for days at a time.
450
00:18:04,175 --> 00:18:07,529
D-don't get me wrong,
I want you here so bad,
451
00:18:07,613 --> 00:18:09,036
but I know you.
452
00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:11,401
And no matter how many juices
I buy,
453
00:18:11,486 --> 00:18:13,507
this place just won't feel
like home.
454
00:18:17,512 --> 00:18:19,650
Sorry. I can't tell
if the screen's frozen,
455
00:18:19,735 --> 00:18:20,650
or if you're just really
shocked.
456
00:18:20,735 --> 00:18:22,949
But if you still want to come,
I'm not gonna tell you not to.
457
00:18:23,033 --> 00:18:25,111
No, no, no, no. Um...
458
00:18:25,196 --> 00:18:27,476
you've made some very valid
points.
459
00:18:27,561 --> 00:18:28,873
Yeah. I didn't even tell you
460
00:18:28,958 --> 00:18:30,439
about the shared bathroom
situation.
461
00:18:30,524 --> 00:18:33,205
Okay, well... maybe you
could've led with that.
462
00:18:33,290 --> 00:18:34,832
Would've saved us some time.
463
00:18:34,917 --> 00:18:37,746
Um, but I guess we just
wait it out?
464
00:18:38,301 --> 00:18:40,219
Seems like our only option.
465
00:18:40,399 --> 00:18:42,665
Yeah, until somebody invents
teleportation.
466
00:18:44,279 --> 00:18:47,785
Okay, well, um...
nobody's home,
467
00:18:47,870 --> 00:18:50,406
so why don't we start
by teleporting you
468
00:18:50,491 --> 00:18:51,834
out of that shirt?
469
00:18:52,175 --> 00:18:53,941
That's not really how
teleportation works,
470
00:18:54,026 --> 00:18:55,446
but I think that I can...
471
00:18:55,530 --> 00:18:57,666
Aww... not again!
472
00:18:57,750 --> 00:19:00,527
I'm so sorry, uh,
but the ants are back
473
00:19:00,612 --> 00:19:02,363
and, uh, I think
what we're about to do
474
00:19:02,448 --> 00:19:05,214
probably wouldn't end very well
if a fire ant was involved.
475
00:19:05,381 --> 00:19:07,590
Um, rain check?
476
00:19:07,675 --> 00:19:09,074
Rain check.
477
00:19:09,970 --> 00:19:11,331
I love you!
478
00:19:11,557 --> 00:19:13,255
Uh, mm, oh!
479
00:19:14,898 --> 00:19:16,421
Love you.
480
00:19:24,011 --> 00:19:26,166
Hey, I'm heading out.
481
00:19:26,251 --> 00:19:27,496
Calling it a night?
482
00:19:27,580 --> 00:19:30,613
Well, actually, my night
is just beginning.
483
00:19:30,779 --> 00:19:33,618
Whoa... Welcome to
the players' club.
484
00:19:33,703 --> 00:19:35,467
No, I'm not high-fiving that.
485
00:19:35,658 --> 00:19:37,757
Look, her name is Vanessa,
486
00:19:37,842 --> 00:19:39,821
and she has a very single,
487
00:19:39,916 --> 00:19:42,342
very attractive friend
over there,
488
00:19:42,427 --> 00:19:43,686
who was just telling me about
489
00:19:43,770 --> 00:19:46,383
all the trouble she's having
with her car.
490
00:19:46,494 --> 00:19:48,832
Bob, this is right up
your alley.
491
00:19:48,917 --> 00:19:51,223
Nobody knows their way around
cars like you.
492
00:19:51,308 --> 00:19:54,077
Yeah, I, uh, was really
hoping to not talk shop.
493
00:19:54,162 --> 00:19:56,373
Bob, just go over
and talk to her.
494
00:19:56,458 --> 00:19:58,618
Look, be yourself.
495
00:19:59,182 --> 00:20:01,446
Have a mint.
Go, go, go, go.
496
00:20:03,355 --> 00:20:05,446
And that, gentlemen,
497
00:20:05,531 --> 00:20:08,010
is how it's done. Bye!
498
00:20:10,148 --> 00:20:13,087
You know, Roland,
I do not miss being single.
499
00:20:13,190 --> 00:20:15,152
Whoa, here's to that.
500
00:20:15,236 --> 00:20:16,918
Cheers, my friend.
501
00:20:17,003 --> 00:20:19,929
Not that I didn't have fun
in my day.
502
00:20:20,014 --> 00:20:22,146
They actually used to call me
"the closer."
503
00:20:22,231 --> 00:20:24,036
Yeah.
Well, that was probably
504
00:20:24,121 --> 00:20:25,989
because women used to close out
their tabs and go home
505
00:20:26,073 --> 00:20:27,755
when you came into the bar.
506
00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:29,803
All right, speaking of
closing out tabs,
507
00:20:29,888 --> 00:20:31,131
I think we should get out
of here.
508
00:20:31,215 --> 00:20:33,395
Which is what the women used
to say to each other
509
00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:34,866
when they saw you walking
through the door.
510
00:20:34,950 --> 00:20:36,999
I'm not setting you up
anymore, Roland.
511
00:20:37,083 --> 00:20:38,740
Which is that what
your matchmaker said!
512
00:20:39,293 --> 00:20:40,838
Oh boy...