1
00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:05,636
<i>Turk's relationship is so messed up</i>
<i>I decided to lighten his mood.</i>

2
00:00:05,720 --> 00:00:09,395
<i>Nothing cracks him up more than</i>
<i>the block-the-door-with-my-foot gag.</i>

3
00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:13,039
<i>Oops, wrong person.</i>

4
00:00:13,120 --> 00:00:15,588
- What happened?
- The door got stuck. Gotta go.

5
00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,478
Baby, you know how much I care
about you, right?

6
00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:20,869
- I'm dizzy.
- Yeah, you're fine.

7
00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:24,111
Honey, I know it looked really
bad last night with me and Kevin

8
00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:26,555
coming home liquored up
with a hot chick.

9
00:00:26,640 --> 00:00:30,110
Kevin was freaking out about
his divorce. I was being supportive.

10
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,953
Yeah, by dragging home
some random bar skank?

11
00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:35,508
- Dude, you're not helping.
- Not trying to help.

12
00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:40,556
I have figured out why you're not ready
to marry me yet.

13
00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:42,437
You think I'm too immature.

14
00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,988
- It's not about that.
- Is it my sleep toots?

15
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:47,799
Cos baby,
I will stop having dairy after six.

16
00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:50,155
I don't know what it is, Turk.

17
00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:53,118
Since you asked me,
all I wanted to do is say yes.

18
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:56,829
It's just that every time I try to,
something stops me.

19
00:00:56,920 --> 00:00:59,115
You just have to be patient.

20
00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,555
Yeah, about that...

21
00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:05,553
So, he just said he was gonna
keep asking until I said yes.

22
00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:07,870
That is exactly how I lost my virginity.

23
00:01:07,960 --> 00:01:11,157
Except Turk didn't propose
in Jim Filliseti's crawl space.

24
00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:14,472
- Yes?
- <i>Whoo-hoo! You said yes!</i>

25
00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:16,915
- <i>We're getting married.</i>
- Stop celebrating.

26
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,797
That's just how I answer the phone.

27
00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:21,348
It's only been ten minutes
since we last talked.

28
00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:24,273
Don't you hate it when people
yap away on their phones?

29
00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:26,237
She's my friend.

30
00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:28,675
But she is so rude.

31
00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:30,671
Don't you work at the hospital too?

32
00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:34,036
Yeah, I actually just got off
a double shift.

33
00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:37,635
- That's why I look so gross.
- Oh, you don't look gross.

34
00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:40,473
You know what,
you don't even think you look gross.

35
00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:44,838
You're one of those girls who uses
self-deprecation as a defence mechanism,

36
00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:49,198
even though, without looking, you can
tell how many guys are checking you out.

37
00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:52,795
- OK, five.
- No, actually, it's four.

38
00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,075
The guy in the mullet
is checking me out.

39
00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,157
I let him buy my last two drinks.

40
00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:00,470
Thanks again, cowboy.

41
00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:05,072
Back off.

42
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:08,475
So what, you just gonna
keep on asking her?

43
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:11,711
If you love somebody,
gotta be willing to break their spirit.

44
00:02:11,800 --> 00:02:13,631
Here you go, fellas.

45
00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,358
Thank you, Jenny.

46
00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:17,635
You're welcome.

47
00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:21,599
Yo, check out these fries.
That girl is so into me.

48
00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:23,830
Please, she's crushing on the brother.

49
00:02:23,920 --> 00:02:26,992
- Why, because you're black?
- Let's get one thing straight.

50
00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:29,640
This has nothing to do
with me being black.

51
00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:32,837
This has something
to do with me being smoother.

52
00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:39,839
Oh, here's a towel.
And here are your shakes.

53
00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:41,831
Thank you, Jenny. Hey, wait, Jenny.

54
00:02:41,920 --> 00:02:43,956
What flavour do you usually go for?

55
00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:47,271
Do you like chocolate or... vanilla?

56
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:49,635
I'm a vanilla girl.

57
00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:52,029
I'll go get you some more towels.

58
00:02:52,120 --> 00:02:55,556
- Go ahead and say it.
- <i>She got jungle fever</i>

59
00:02:55,640 --> 00:02:58,029
<i>She got jungle fever</i>

60
00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:01,835
I had so much fun tonight.

61
00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:04,195
I hope I didn't talk
about myself too much?

62
00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:08,034
Hey, Elliot, I said I wanted
to know everything about you.

63
00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:10,270
And now I do.

64
00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:13,238
So listen, I'd like to take you out
tomorrow night.

65
00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:15,675
I don't wanna seem
like I'm rushing things...

66
00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:19,278
See you tomorrow.

67
00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:21,351
Oh, my God!

68
00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:23,237
What?

69
00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,392
I'm not big on public displays
of affection, that's all.

70
00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:29,879
Hit it.

71
00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:35,711
Carla Espinoza, will you marry me?

72
00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:37,791
Oh, my God.

73
00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:41,270
C'mon, citizens, let me hear you.

74
00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:44,352
Honk in the name of love.

75
00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:48,837
Honk for love! Honk for love!

76
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,156
<i>I've gotta say, life is pretty good.</i>

77
00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:09,391
<i>I've hit my stride as a doctor,</i>
<i>all my patients are doing well,</i>

78
00:04:09,480 --> 00:04:13,109
<i>and I've finally figured out</i>
<i>that even though they're uncomfortable,</i>

79
00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:15,998
<i>my medium scrubs</i>
<i>have a large effect on the ladies.</i>

80
00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:18,116
<i>Yep, everything's just great.</i>

81
00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:21,556
<i>For the first time since I started,</i>
<i>I have no stories to tell.</i>

82
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:24,837
<i>Sometimes you know it's a crappy day</i>
<i>from the moment you wake.</i>

83
00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:26,399
<i>Today was one of those days.</i>

84
00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:31,195
<i>See, I have an appointment</i>
<i>to see my shrink,</i>

85
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:34,238
<i>and it feels like there's</i>
<i>a little friction between us.</i>

86
00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:36,151
You will not beat me.

87
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:38,390
Listen, "Doctor",

88
00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:40,596
while we're on me just for a second,

89
00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:43,319
my very pregnant ex-wife
would like me to take

90
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:46,073
a couple of days off
and travel to her mother's house

91
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,878
so we can reconnect as a family.

92
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:50,633
And I assume that you told her
to blow it out her ass.

93
00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:53,792
You get me! Darn it, you do!

94
00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:58,237
Yes, we're like two peas
in a horrible, horrible pod.

95
00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:02,472
Anyway, I invited a couple of my friends
over to the apartment while she's gone.

96
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:04,790
Some beers, watch the game.
It'll be great.

97
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:07,553
- And I was wondering if you...
- I'm not your friend.

98
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:09,471
They're not either.

99
00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,551
So how's your rage going lately?

100
00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:17,078
Better.

101
00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:18,513
OK.

102
00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:22,229
Next time you feel anger welling up
in your meaty chest...

103
00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:23,719
Oh, give it to me.

104
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,997
Take a deep breath
and count to ten before you react.

105
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:29,116
Do you think you could do that, Perry?

106
00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:32,192
For the record, I'm not a child. OK?

107
00:05:32,280 --> 00:05:34,430
Dr Cox?

108
00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:36,988
I just wanted to tell you...
Well the thing is...

109
00:05:37,080 --> 00:05:39,992
<i>One, two, ten.</i>

110
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:43,277
Finish the sentence in the next
two seconds or start running.

111
00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:47,315
Dear God,
you're actually frozen with fear.

112
00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:50,039
Don't worry about a thing.
I'll talk you through it.

113
00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:54,591
I want you to relax,
take a big breath, and now...

114
00:05:55,080 --> 00:05:57,230
Get outta here! Go, go, go, go, go.

115
00:05:57,320 --> 00:05:59,834
- Morning, Dr Cox.
- <i>Gladys, Ginger, Tiffany, no.</i>

116
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:01,990
<i>Cheryl, Betsy... Ooh, that's new.</i>

117
00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:04,799
Betsy, good morning.
Let's make with the chop-chop.

118
00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:07,599
You already used Betsy,
like six months ago.

119
00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:11,036
- <i>Dammit!</i>
- Perry! How are you, etcetera?

120
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:14,430
The wife and I took out a new
insurance policy. I need a physical.

121
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:17,751
Bob, the day I willingly cradle
your dusty old twig and berries

122
00:06:17,840 --> 00:06:20,991
and get a whiff of your halitosis
while you turn and cough,

123
00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:23,913
is the day I'll be on the roof
singing <i>I Believe I Can Fly.</i>

124
00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:26,116
Great stuff. See you about two-ish.

125
00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:30,274
- You should just do it.
- Really?

126
00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:33,397
It'll take 15 minutes
and it wouldn't hurt to be in with him.

127
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:36,517
- You're giving me advice?
- Feel free to return the favour.

128
00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,352
Fair enough. Try this on for size.

129
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,590
No matter where you go in life,

130
00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:44,389
always keep an eye out for Johnny,
the tackling Alzheimer's patient.

131
00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:46,913
What's that supposed to mean?

132
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,672
Who am I?

133
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:55,429
Just run one of the other nurses
down here with some bedpans, please.

134
00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:57,033
<i>Laverne, why can't you do it?</i>

135
00:06:57,120 --> 00:06:59,588
I've been here for 23 years
and my feet hurt.

136
00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:00,999
<i>After all I've done...</i>

137
00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:03,913
Laverne, I am so excited
about this doctor I just met.

138
00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:06,309
He's nice and humble.

139
00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:09,278
I hate how so many doctors
are so self-centred, you know?

140
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:12,796
- I know, girl. Yesterday...
- And he's cute, too.

141
00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:16,316
Hey, fresh bedpans here.
Get 'em before they're hot.

142
00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:22,270
- Dr Reid.
- Hey, Nurse... Paul.

143
00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:25,636
- It's Paul Flowers, actually.
- Flowers?

144
00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:27,551
Yep. Up you go.

145
00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:36,389
- Marry me?
- Still thinking.

146
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:40,155
OK. Baby, I have figured out
what's bothering you.

147
00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:41,719
- Really?
- Yep!

148
00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:44,678
You think I haven't
played the field enough.

149
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:48,548
I just wanted you to know, that I've had
a long, productive playing career,

150
00:07:48,640 --> 00:07:52,872
over which time I've slept
with many, many women.

151
00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:57,475
And by many, many women, I mean three.

152
00:07:57,560 --> 00:08:00,074
Take away two,
equals one and that's you.

153
00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:03,716
Marry me? No!

154
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:08,076
Here's the deal. I want all of you guys
at my place tonight.

155
00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:11,470
Get there for 7:30. We'll have food,
booze, the whole nine yards.

156
00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:14,552
- Will there be prostitutes?
- No.

157
00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:16,669
Good.

158
00:08:19,440 --> 00:08:22,398
<i>It's just a physical.</i>
<i>You can be cordial.</i>

159
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:23,754
What do you say there?

160
00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:26,229
How 'bout we do
just like you do with Enid?

161
00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:29,118
Close our eyes,
pretend we're with someone else

162
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:30,997
and be done before Leno starts.

163
00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:33,833
Save the racket
for the tennis court, big guy.

164
00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:36,070
I took the liberty
of filling out the form.

165
00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:41,188
All you have to do is sign right below
where it says, "Fit as a 26-year-old."

166
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:45,159
You're not suggesting I rubber-stamp
your insurance physical, are you?

167
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,708
Just sign the damn form.

168
00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:50,075
Or you could take your shirt off
right now

169
00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:52,515
and be done with all this
in five minutes.

170
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,273
I am not going to make this
uncomfortable for you.

171
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:59,239
- Come on, I'm a professional.
- OK.

172
00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:08,474
Had to be done, Bob.
Continue, handsome.

173
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,995
- How's it going?
- I just got my vertebrae fused.

174
00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:22,953
I've got nothing.

175
00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:25,156
Hey! Hold that elevator!

176
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:29,351
I'm pressing the button.
It's not working.

177
00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:31,112
Hold it! Hey!

178
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,952
Hold it!

179
00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:53,838
- Morning, ma'am.
- I can't move my head.

180
00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:56,036
So what?

181
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:01,879
Carol, I cannot thank you enough.

182
00:10:02,600 --> 00:10:04,318
Is that Bengay?

183
00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:07,836
Come on, Elliot,
so Paul's a male nurse.

184
00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:10,798
You're big enough
not to let that bother you, right?

185
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:13,155
I'm dating a murse.

186
00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:16,471
Better that than a mecretary.
Or a manicurist.

187
00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:18,312
- No, that works.
- It's no big deal.

188
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:20,994
Only you guys know. And Nurse Roberts.

189
00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,596
She's not that much of a gossip!
Is she?

190
00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:30,436
Dr Reid, Nurse Paul.
Dr Reid, Nurse Paul.

191
00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:33,478
Dr Reid, Nurse Paul.
Dr Reid, Nurse Paul!

192
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:48,438
We're talking about only six inches
and about 70 pounds,

193
00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:51,318
plus he's twice as fast
as the other guy.

194
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:54,915
Dr Reid and Nurse Paul... dating.

195
00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,431
Giant, who cares?

196
00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:59,875
So see you fellas tonight,
what, around 7:30?

197
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,837
Don't be late or you won't get a seat.

198
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:04,309
- I'll bring the Fluffernutters.
- Newbie.

199
00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:07,153
I'd invite you.
Unfortunately, it's guys only.

200
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:09,549
You and your damn physical.

201
00:11:09,640 --> 00:11:11,437
Thanks to my high blood pressure,

202
00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:15,069
my insurance premium will cost me
an extra six grand this year.

203
00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:17,799
That's six grand my wife
already spent on a new chin.

204
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:20,599
If I were you,
I would plan to work every holiday

205
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:23,956
from now until a few months
after you're dead.

206
00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:27,956
Newbie, this is your fault.

207
00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:29,598
<i>Where is he?</i>

208
00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:32,319
<i>Where is that little rat bastard?</i>

209
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:34,197
Oh, hey, pal.

210
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:38,274
I'll always remember our time together.

211
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:39,634
Gotta go.

212
00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:45,551
- Marry me?
- Still thinking.

213
00:11:45,640 --> 00:11:48,200
I figured it out.
This is what you're afraid of.

214
00:11:48,280 --> 00:11:50,748
The typical surgeon.
A dumb, arrogant frat boy

215
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,592
whose behaviour is so disgusting,

216
00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:55,638
it is embarrassing for a woman
to be seen with him.

217
00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:58,075
- No offence, buddy.
- None taken. I gotta run.

218
00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:01,516
They're doing a breast reduction
on three. I wanna try to stop it.

219
00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:03,636
You know what I'm talking about.

220
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:07,350
- It's not The Todd.
- It's gotta be The Todd.

221
00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:09,078
Turk, will you stop?

222
00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:11,310
Yes, I've never been
a big fan of surgeons

223
00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:14,312
and, yes, I worry
about your maturity sometimes.

224
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:15,879
I'm a worrier, it's what I do.

225
00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:19,191
But you have got to stop trying
to pinpoint what the reason is.

226
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,872
Cos there's so many, right?

227
00:12:20,960 --> 00:12:24,748
I mean, you don't like who I am,
you don't like what I do.

228
00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:26,478
C'mon, I like the way

229
00:12:26,560 --> 00:12:28,710
I have to stand
on my tippy toes to kiss you.

230
00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:31,393
It's not enough.

231
00:12:35,480 --> 00:12:40,508
Hey, Elliot. I heard you got your
nursing degree in the male... nurse!

232
00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:42,716
What's up?!

233
00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,192
That's her. Don't look.

234
00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:51,633
Murse!

235
00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,631
Oh, my God.

236
00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:57,600
Whoa, Doctor!
Hey, I'm not that type of gal.

237
00:12:57,680 --> 00:13:01,036
Shut up, Paul.
You are a man and I am a woman.

238
00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:02,792
Hey, Elliot, are you OK?

239
00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:08,512
I got very drunk last night

240
00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:11,831
and I decided
that I'm not giving up on you.

241
00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:16,232
So, how'd you do
with my counting exercise?

242
00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:18,788
I tried it once
and I thought it was stupid.

243
00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:21,110
- That's it. We're done.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

244
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:24,237
- You're dumping me?
- I hope we can remain friends.

245
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:27,596
Now, please don't take away
the privilege of letting me pay you

246
00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:31,912
$200 an hour so I can drag my ass
in here and watch you nod.

247
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:34,753
The only other place
I can get that on the planet

248
00:13:34,840 --> 00:13:36,910
is from my Brett Favre bobblehead doll.

249
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:40,039
Fine, you wanna know
what I really think?

250
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:42,270
Your problem isn't making bad choices.

251
00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:46,433
It's that you identify the good choice
and then intentionally do the opposite.

252
00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:49,637
You see,
behind this boorish bravado of yours

253
00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:53,235
is a paralysing fear
of letting anyone into your life.

254
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:57,154
And it isn't because you weren't loved
when you were a kid.

255
00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,357
You're so egocentric
that the love wasn't enough.

256
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:01,839
So you pulled pigtails

257
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:04,309
and you pushed the fat kids
into the dirt

258
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:07,631
so no one could ignore little Perry.

259
00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:11,550
Well, little Perry is now 40 years old

260
00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:14,757
and is so invested
in this narcissistic notion of yourself

261
00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,400
as "loner" that you can't quit.

262
00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:20,950
And you'll just keep dumping on
everyone around you

263
00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:25,238
until eventually,
and please, trust me on this,

264
00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:28,039
there won't be anyone left.

265
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:31,829
<i>There's a million reasons</i>
<i>a relationship can crash and burn.</i>

266
00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:37,951
Give me a break.

267
00:14:40,120 --> 00:14:43,430
<i>Whether it's because you don't</i>
<i>have the stones to make it work.</i>

268
00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:47,308
Sorry, I have to... cancel tonight.

269
00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:53,430
<i>Or you just get sick and tired</i>
<i>ofjumping through hoops.</i>

270
00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:55,556
OK. You win.

271
00:14:55,640 --> 00:14:59,599
All right, you don't have to worry about
me asking you over and over anymore.

272
00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:04,875
<i>Eventually, everyone bails.</i>

273
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:09,153
Two bits.

274
00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:11,515
If it isn't my favourite
career counsellor.

275
00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:14,512
You don't have more tips
on how to climb down the ladder?

276
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:17,672
I've been thinking about
how you blame me for everything

277
00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:20,752
and how you just send a constant stream
of crap my way,

278
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:23,957
and... I decided I need a break.

279
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:26,554
So you came by to tell me
you're a complete wuss?

280
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:30,349
No, I came over here to tell you
I traded with another resident

281
00:15:30,440 --> 00:15:32,590
and switched off
your service for a while.

282
00:15:32,680 --> 00:15:34,716
Well, tears and hugs there, Katie,

283
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:38,076
but unless you wanna come inside
and give the fellas a lap dance,

284
00:15:38,160 --> 00:15:39,718
I gotta say <i>sayonara,</i>

285
00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:42,394
cos I got 20 guys in here
and it's about to get nutty.

286
00:15:42,480 --> 00:15:44,232
All the best, baby.

287
00:16:01,880 --> 00:16:03,836
<i>Turns out last night got in my head,</i>

288
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,911
<i>so this morning I swallowed my pride</i>

289
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,991
<i>and asked Dr Gross to take me back.</i>

290
00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,548
I have a hammer in my desk.

291
00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:13,234
<i>It did not go well.</i>

292
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:17,074
Dr Cox,
I was the one who switched with JD.

293
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:19,879
Nervous Guy! How you feeling?

294
00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:21,916
- A little nervous.
- Oh, that's OK.

295
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,753
Don't worry about a thing,
cos I'm gonna ease you in.

296
00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:28,469
You have eight seconds to find
this patient's chart or you're through.

297
00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:32,758
- Oh, God! Chart? Chart?
- You want me to look for it?

298
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:36,355
- Has anyone seen the chart?
- I got the chart right here.

299
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:40,075
- Cheer-up hug?
- What?

300
00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:41,639
When I was little and sad,

301
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:44,553
my mom would always have the maid
give me a cheer-up hug.

302
00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:48,428
Further explaining your love
of the Latino people.

303
00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:52,513
Carla, whenever you need to talk.

304
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:55,114
It's just I don't think
that Turk is being fair.

305
00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:58,988
He didn't get the answer he wanted when
he wanted it so now he's pushing...

306
00:17:00,560 --> 00:17:02,073
What do you want?

307
00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:07,559
OK, wait, wait, wait.

308
00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:10,473
Are you kissing me
because you want this to go somewhere

309
00:17:10,560 --> 00:17:14,189
or because you feel bad about
blowing me off yesterday?

310
00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:16,635
Actually, I don't care either way.

311
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:22,470
I decided to bail on Cox
for a while, you know?

312
00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,836
He sees a shrink every day
and is still the biggest pain in my ass.

313
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,512
Is he in group?

314
00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:32,152
Maybe it's not everybody else,
maybe it's you.

315
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:33,673
- Yeah.
- Good sharing.

316
00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,955
- I see your point.
- That sounds right.

317
00:17:40,280 --> 00:17:42,714
- Anybody got anything else?
- Yeah, I got one.

318
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:44,392
Come here.

319
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:47,790
I don't think he'd do well in group.

320
00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:50,519
So what's up with Carla?

321
00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:54,798
I'm starting to think if she really
loved me, I'd know by now.

322
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,677
Maybe it's time to retreat,

323
00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:59,797
protect myself
so I don't get hurt any worse.

324
00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:01,757
- I don't wanna talk about it.
- Sure.

325
00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:05,719
- Here you go, fellas.
- Thank you, Jenny.

326
00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:10,715
- You're welcome.
- Eight strips of bacon.

327
00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:13,758
That girl is all about the J-Dizzle.

328
00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:15,990
Oh, yeah?

329
00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:19,993
- My God, it's Pancake Panda.
- That's what I'm talking about.

330
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,229
Keep it together, pee-pants.

331
00:18:23,320 --> 00:18:27,199
You have six seconds to find
that soda you were holding for me.

332
00:18:28,680 --> 00:18:31,877
Has anyone seen a soda?
Oh, for the love of God.

333
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:33,951
What is it there, Bobbo?

334
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:36,752
I'm sorry.

335
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:40,873
What did you say?

336
00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:42,791
I spoke to my cardiologist

337
00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:45,713
and he said if you hadn't caught
my high blood pressure,

338
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:47,518
and it had continued unchecked,

339
00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:51,798
it might have resulted
in a mild case of... death.

340
00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:56,469
<i>Must fight urge to rub it in his face.</i>

341
00:18:56,560 --> 00:18:59,438
Anyway, I owe you one.

342
00:18:59,520 --> 00:19:03,877
<i>Must rub something in someone's face.</i>

343
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,920
How's that coma
going for you there, pal?

344
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,877
<i>Much better.</i>

345
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:14,949
I bet you never
made out in there before.

346
00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:18,999
No, never.

347
00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:21,959
Come here.

348
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:26,830
Nurse, I need clean sheets right away
to room one... thousand.

349
00:19:26,920 --> 00:19:30,037
She's covering because she's
embarrassed she likes a nurse

350
00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:32,236
and I really can't figure out why.

351
00:19:32,320 --> 00:19:34,880
That's because
you're doing a woman's job, son.

352
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:37,269
Have a good one.

353
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:40,879
Great. Why did you do that?

354
00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:45,078
You know, what I do for a living doesn't
make me feel like any less of a man.

355
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,470
Neither does my love of baking
or gardening,

356
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:50,630
or that I occasionally menstruate.

357
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,188
- What?
- Elliot, lighten up.

358
00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:56,590
Stop worrying so much about
what everybody else thinks.

359
00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:04,071
Go ahead. I'll see you outside.

360
00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:05,354
OK.

361
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:10,190
Boy, I gotta say, your wife is hotter
than I ever imagined.

362
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:15,793
Hello, Perry.
You're obviously trying to bully me.

363
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,440
But you can't bully me
because I don't fear you.

364
00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:21,830
- Now I'm leaving.
- Kelso asked me to give him a physical.

365
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,070
He said thank you
and told me he owed me one.

366
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,269
You actually made a decision

367
00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:30,158
that benefited you
personally and professionally?

368
00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:32,435
Well, a resident
kinda talked me into it.

369
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:34,192
Come on. You're telling me

370
00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:37,477
that you took the advice
of another human being?

371
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:42,552
- This is a great moment for me.
- Congratulations.

372
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:44,551
Thank you.

373
00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:46,756
And, Perry,

374
00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:50,594
if there's someone at that hellhole
of a hospital you actually listen to,

375
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:53,148
do everything in your power
to keep them around,

376
00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:56,550
because that person
is nothing short of a genius.

377
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:17,357
Batcave.

378
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,396
Hi, yeah, I'm stuck in the elevator.

379
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:22,313
Yeah, I'm afraid
it might be a little while.

380
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,072
Because you did this.

381
00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:27,152
Ah, no. I think we both know
you did this to yourself.

382
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:28,992
Well, I'll let you go.

383
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:32,831
Hello!

384
00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:36,550
Hey, Laverne,
have you seen Turk around?

385
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:39,916
He's off today, honey.
How come you don't know that?

386
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:41,911
I don't know.

387
00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:45,196
Everybody, I appreciate solidarity,

388
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,669
but I did not blow off Paul
because he's a nurse.

389
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,877
Stop leaving bedpans in my locker.
It makes me cry.

390
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:53,599
Paul and I are just different, OK?

391
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:55,989
Please, Elliot, this is not about Paul.

392
00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,672
This is about you.

393
00:21:57,760 --> 00:22:01,719
About you not being able to commit
because that means saying goodbye

394
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,633
to whatever unfulfilled fantasy of love
you concocted

395
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:06,676
after seeing too many Meg Ryan movies.

396
00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:09,957
But men don't make everything
all better. They're only human.

397
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:12,315
Don't punish him
because you grew up so fast,

398
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,630
you never let someone else
take care of you.

399
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:18,315
He's not your father. He won't disappear
at the first sign of trouble.

400
00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:21,949
And as scary as it is being truly
vulnerable with another human being,

401
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:26,591
what's even scarier is that deep down
inside you know you picked this man,

402
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,511
and if you run away, you'll run away

403
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:32,070
from being the kind of person
you always wanted to be.

404
00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:36,953
Carla, I just met the guy.

405
00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:44,115
All right, here we go, baby.
Here we go.

406
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,395
Are you talking to that chilli dog?

407
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,198
Hey.

408
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:50,191
Yeah, well.

409
00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:55,229
I find that they don't repeat on me
as much if I'm real friendly to 'em.

410
00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:59,034
- What?
- Nothing.

411
00:22:59,120 --> 00:23:01,793
It's weird seeing you in the real world,
you know?

412
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:04,599
I feel kinda guilty.
You're so nice to me and my buddy

413
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:06,796
and we've never had a real conversation.

414
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:10,429
We act like school kids and argue
over who we think you got a crush on.

415
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:14,229
- It's totally you.
- What?

416
00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:17,475
Vanilla over chocolate? Please.

417
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:22,109
In the event of a water landing.

418
00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:26,113
Yeah. Incoming. How you doing?

419
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:28,919
Did you climb down an elevator shaft
to torment me?

420
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:31,798
Sometimes in life,
you gotta do what you gotta do.

421
00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:35,873
Look, I promise you the Door Open button
was not working.

422
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:37,916
No, it's OK.
We can work this thing out.

423
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,992
Seriously, put your hands together
like you're praying.

424
00:23:44,600 --> 00:23:46,670
Hey, Dr Cox! Good to see ya.

425
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:48,432
<i>What the hell, he's a decent kid.</i>

426
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:51,557
<i>Be a man and apologise to him</i>
<i>from the heart for once.</i>

427
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:54,359
For God's sake, Lily,
stop being such a complete wuss

428
00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:55,953
and come back to work with me.

429
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:58,759
- Fine.
- Good.

430
00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:02,196
<i>Give him a pat on the back.</i>
<i>He's wanted it since day one.</i>

431
00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:05,790
<i>Just do it.</i>

432
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:08,516
<i>The second Dr Cox</i>
<i>patted me on the shoulder</i>

433
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,273
<i>I thought about how</i>
<i>he always shows up just in time.</i>

434
00:24:11,360 --> 00:24:12,475
I'll hang onto this.

435
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:15,279
<i>I guess in the end,</i>
<i>everything comes down to timing.</i>

436
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:19,120
<i>Sometimes, you just have</i>
<i>one moment to seize it.</i>

437
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:20,713
Paul.

438
00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,633
I know that I've been acting
like an insecure idiot.

439
00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:27,030
If you'll forgive me,
I'd love to take you for dinner tonight.

440
00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:29,759
Screw that. I'll cook for you.

441
00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:35,199
I've only got one apron, though,
so bring your own if you wanna wear one.

442
00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:41,070
Oh, please.
You all wish you could bag a nurse.

443
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:44,197
- She's right.
- Shut up, Zeltzer.

444
00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:46,111
You shut up.

445
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:49,158
<i>And if your timing is good</i>
<i>and it works out for you...</i>

446
00:24:50,120 --> 00:24:52,714
<i>...make sure you cherish it.</i>

447
00:24:52,800 --> 00:24:55,758
<i>Because bad timing</i>
<i>can mess up everything.</i>

448
00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,638
You wanna grab a cup of coffee?

449
00:24:58,720 --> 00:24:59,914
I don't know.

450
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:04,040
I'll let you talk to it
before you drink it.

451
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:08,070
OK. We can get one cup of coffee.

452
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:10,435
- Just one cup.
- One cup. Sure.

453
00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:15,150
Hold on one second.
Let me just answer this real quick.

454
00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:18,038
- Yeah, hello.
- <i>Ask me again.</i>

455
00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:25,394
Sorry, but I gotta go.