1 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:15,633 Nurse Espinoza, 2 00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:19,474 do you by any chance know what time your 9.30 shift starts? 3 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:22,757 - 9:30? - That's what I would've said. 4 00:00:22,840 --> 00:00:25,035 But I had Ted stand out in the parking lot 5 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,590 and monitor your arrival times this week. Ted? 6 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:34,198 9.34, 9.39, 9.41, 9.33 and 9.50. 7 00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:36,999 How is that law degree working out for you, Ted? 8 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:39,355 I was going to be a senator. 9 00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:42,000 I haven't perused the latest nursing contract, 10 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:45,436 I'm guessing it doesn't say "show up when you damn well please." 11 00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:48,432 Here's an idea. What say you stop showing up altogether 12 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:50,954 and we'll replace you with a giant time clock? 13 00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:52,359 If we ever miss you, 14 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:55,000 we'll just have a Bob Kelso cuckoo bird pop out 15 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:59,392 every few minutes and say, "I've never satisfied a woman." 16 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:02,074 Come on, Ted. 17 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:04,958 Dr Cox didn't know he was the father of Jordan's baby, 18 00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:07,031 but they were getting along better. 19 00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:09,475 - I love you. - I love you. 20 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,955 As for us, it was the end of our second year, 21 00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:17,315 and each day had begun to feel the same. 22 00:01:22,680 --> 00:01:25,911 After a while, your residency boils down to just a few things. 23 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,797 Paperwork. 24 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:31,792 The three prescriptions every patient gets. 25 00:01:31,880 --> 00:01:33,677 Acetaminophen for her headache, 26 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,558 Restoril so she'll sleep, and Colace so she'll poop. 27 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:38,631 Paperwork. 28 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,675 Mind-numbing monotony. 29 00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:44,638 And, of course, paperwork. 30 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:53,428 As for the patients... 31 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:56,875 Look, because it's diabetes-related, 32 00:01:56,960 --> 00:01:59,838 the pain in your foot isn't responding to pain killers. 33 00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:02,229 I'd like to try an anti-seizure medication 34 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:04,117 before we consider amputation. 35 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:06,998 Good, because I have an audition for Stomp tomorrow. 36 00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:09,992 Look, just cut the damn thing off, will ya? 37 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:12,469 That's why I'm so psyched our college buddy, 38 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:14,039 Spence, was coming to town. 39 00:02:14,120 --> 00:02:16,031 - Jill Anderson. - Yes. 40 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:18,111 - No. - Monica Meyer. 41 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,236 - Yeah. - Yes. 42 00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:22,276 I don't think it's appropriate for us 43 00:02:22,360 --> 00:02:24,749 to be rehashing our college sexual conquests 44 00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:26,592 with Carla in the other room. 45 00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:28,477 - Leslie Stevens. - Yes! 46 00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:31,154 On a pile of coats with hundreds of people around. 47 00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:32,798 What a whore! 48 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:35,110 Who else? Who else did you bang? 49 00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:38,510 Carla, college wasn't all sex and coats. 50 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:41,273 Spence here got me through a lot of hard times. 51 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:45,630 Why don't you just mousse the crap out of it? 52 00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:47,995 Straight up. 53 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:49,069 Yes. 54 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:54,551 - My life changed that day. - Man, that was a long time ago. 55 00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:58,269 Now you two are engaged, I'm in town because two frat brothers 56 00:02:58,360 --> 00:02:59,793 are getting married. 57 00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:02,917 - A double wedding? - No. 58 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:05,952 Good for the boys. 59 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,396 The point is, we've really grown up. 60 00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:15,271 That's good, good sauce. 61 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:17,590 Check it out. 62 00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:19,272 Free pitcher. 63 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,273 What I've got you on is D-five half normal saline 64 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:28,635 with 20 KCL at 100ccs an hour. 65 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:30,870 The Cadillac of all hangover cures. 66 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,633 - It feels warm in my tummy. - Good morning, angels. 67 00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:36,188 Did you have one too many Daiquiris last night? 68 00:03:36,280 --> 00:03:39,670 - Spence, this is Dr Cox and... - Don't bother. Don't care. 69 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:42,479 He's the scary man you told me about last night. 70 00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:45,074 - Hey, congratulations. - For what, jackass? 71 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:48,709 - You just had a baby. - No, she just had a baby. 72 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:51,678 But you said it was his. And you said something else. 73 00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:54,877 - That he didn't know it yet. - That's exactly right. 74 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:59,078 Holy crap. Run away. Run away. Run away. 75 00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:17,794 OK, he hasn't said a word in over ten minutes. 76 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:19,836 The hell with it. I'm going in. 77 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:21,035 Dr Cox... 78 00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:23,998 If the next words aren't "See you," the third will be, 79 00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:26,640 "My crotch, you've punched me in the crotch." 80 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:28,119 See you. 81 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:33,269 - How about that guy? - Yeah. 82 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:34,429 - That guy? - Yeah. 83 00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:36,511 Maybe it would be easier if I told you 84 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:38,636 whose butt I haven't had my fingers in. 85 00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:40,711 That's a perk you never hear about. 86 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:43,234 You guys landed your dream jobs, huh? 87 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:45,072 Dream job. 88 00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:01,359 Hey, man, how am I supposed to finish this memo? 89 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:03,795 I don't know. 90 00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:08,430 Do you have any interesting patients? 91 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,592 Mr Weinberg has dementia but still enjoys his ronking. 92 00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:13,557 - What's ronking? - Ronk! 93 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:16,359 - Interesting. - Hey, sweetness. 94 00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:19,796 - Ronk. - When do people yell "stat"? 95 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:22,792 Kinda never. Bambi, rounds. 96 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:26,634 - Dammit. - Run, Johnny, run. 97 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:31,077 - Trying to add a little drama. - I felt it. 98 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,312 This is not a good day to be late. 99 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,231 Every year, Kelso picks a resident 100 00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:39,470 to ride mercilessly until they crumble. 101 00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:43,075 The key is to jump on any easy question and impress him early. 102 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:45,628 - Right, shall we get started? - Yes! 103 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:49,030 - Excuse me? - Should we get started? Yes. 104 00:05:49,120 --> 00:05:50,792 Wow... 105 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:54,475 Dr Reid, do an ABG on bed four without waking him. 106 00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:57,632 Dr... Young Asian Fellow, 107 00:05:57,720 --> 00:05:59,790 bed seven needs a central line. 108 00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,758 Dr Murphy and Dr Eager Beaver, step forward. 109 00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:05,957 This is it. Last man standing. 110 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:08,713 What are the four differential diagnoses 111 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,155 of the persistent ST elevation on any EKG? 112 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:12,514 - Dorian. - Ischemia. 113 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:13,749 - Murphy. - Aneurysm. 114 00:06:13,840 --> 00:06:14,989 - Dorian. - Pericarditis. 115 00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:17,071 - Murphy. - Pass. 116 00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:23,392 Ah, Doug. At least you're going to a more chocolaty place. 117 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:25,516 Dr Murphy. 118 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:28,238 Ronk! 119 00:06:28,320 --> 00:06:32,279 Dr Reid! A moment, please. 120 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:36,798 - No, you didn't. - I did. 121 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:40,270 Every time I turn around, Dr Kelso's riding me. 122 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:43,557 I've got next. What's up? 123 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:46,108 No one? Self-five. 124 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:49,111 For the big dog. 125 00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:52,716 Look, Elliot, I've seen this before. 126 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:56,270 Kelso worries he's not scary, so he picks somebody to be his bitch. 127 00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:58,157 Who he picks is totally random. 128 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,549 Unless you throw a needle in his face. 129 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:03,996 OK, I didn't tell you the kid was yours and you're upset. 130 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:08,517 I get it. But you seem to be making a really big deal out of this. 131 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:11,068 Is there something else that's bothering you? 132 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,435 It's mostly just the kid thing. 133 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:16,114 I didn't want you to feel pressured to be with me. 134 00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:18,236 I didn't want you to feel manipulated. 135 00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:20,038 I am so, so sorry, 136 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:23,157 but no matter what you say, you don't have a leg to stand on. 137 00:07:23,240 --> 00:07:25,231 I don't know about that, Perry. 138 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:28,312 Sounds like she's trying to protect your relationship. 139 00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:31,119 Some mothers say the only way to get a guy to marry you 140 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,350 - is by using pregnancy as a trap. - What? 141 00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:35,431 Stupid mothers who got even meaner 142 00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:37,476 when they stopped drinking. 143 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,038 Morning. 144 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,714 - I make more than you do. - What? 145 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,758 I saw your paycheck. I make more than you do. 146 00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:49,832 - Quite a bit more. - You couldn't have seen it. 147 00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:52,354 No way I could access the personnel files. 148 00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:53,873 Just impossible. 149 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:59,316 By the way, 987654320. 150 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:02,756 - My Social Security number. - No. That's your PIN number. 151 00:08:02,840 --> 00:08:06,674 - No, my PIN number is 3674. - Bingo. 152 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:11,671 Do you have any idea what it feels like 153 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:13,671 to have a janitor make more than you? 154 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:16,558 Johnny. Investment banker. So, no. 155 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,076 Why, Christopher? 156 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:21,559 I've saved up 500 bucks. 157 00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:23,870 Where would you put that if you were me? 158 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:25,518 A wallet, a money clip. 159 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:28,990 You could get Schmitty and Dan a wedding gift. Dan wants a ferret. 160 00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:31,310 - Ferrets are nice. - They're mean. 161 00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:33,994 Let's go do something special tonight. My treat. 162 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:38,039 We gotta kinda lay low tonight. We're on backup call. 163 00:08:38,120 --> 00:08:41,078 See, now, this is the proper way to lay low. 164 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,594 I mean, honestly, does it get any better? 165 00:08:43,680 --> 00:08:45,955 No, it does not. 166 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:55,070 Why do you keep looking at me like that? 167 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,071 People. 168 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:03,349 Ed, did you turn on the jets in the hot tub? 169 00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:06,750 - No. - It's too hot on my eyes! 170 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:12,514 Those sutures look awful, don't you think, Ted? 171 00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:15,956 I don't know, sir. Yes? No? I'm barely here. 172 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:20,033 I know what you're doing, sir, the whole keep-us-scared thing. 173 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:24,795 - I'm OK with it. - Dr Reid. 174 00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:28,077 Even if you hadn't just missed blinding me earlier, 175 00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:30,196 I still would've picked you to crap on. 176 00:09:30,280 --> 00:09:33,556 You're easily startled, you're constantly overwhelmed. 177 00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:34,959 While you work hard, 178 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,032 you still struggle to break into the middle of the pack. 179 00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:42,716 I chose you because I am hoping that you will ask yourself, 180 00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:46,873 really ask yourself, if there isn't some other profession 181 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:49,269 you might be better suited for. 182 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:54,753 In the meantime, be a doll and re-suture that wound. 183 00:09:59,520 --> 00:10:01,317 Wanna get a beer later? 184 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,031 I can't believe you didn't tell me. 185 00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:09,192 And while we're coming completely clean, Perry, 186 00:10:09,280 --> 00:10:12,431 I'm not the girl they're singing about in My Sharona. 187 00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:13,999 Her name's Sharona. 188 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:17,390 - You're making jokes? - I just want this to be OK. 189 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:19,994 Don't get me wrong. I wanna be with the kid. 190 00:10:20,080 --> 00:10:22,275 I'm damn sure gonna be with the kid. 191 00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:24,430 But as far as you and I go... 192 00:10:25,760 --> 00:10:28,558 ...I just don't see us working out. 193 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:43,119 Nothing like cold beers in a Jacuzzi. Am I right, Ed? 194 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:47,273 Some days I sit out here for hours, downing cold one after cold one. 195 00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:49,669 What do you do when you have to pee? 196 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:54,231 - So you boys are doctors, huh? - OK, whoa, Frannie. 197 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,833 That was my ass. 198 00:10:57,240 --> 00:11:00,596 - You guys have to go to work? - No, it's just a stupid intern. 199 00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:03,877 The only way we have to go in is if there was some catastrophe. 200 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:07,953 In breaking news, there's been a multiple car pile-up on the throughway. 201 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:10,833 Plus, the two guys on call 202 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,514 would have to be simultaneously incapacitated. 203 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:16,994 This is my chance to shine. 204 00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:20,033 What's up, chica? Whoa! 205 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:21,997 Oh, God! 206 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:27,635 Part of being a doctor is learning to deal with the unexpected. 207 00:11:29,440 --> 00:11:32,238 Whether it's someone who won't take no for an answer. 208 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:35,073 I've decided not to accept the being-dumped thing. 209 00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:37,549 I'm gonna hang around until you forgive me. 210 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,831 Or being shaken to your very core. 211 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:46,477 Sometimes it's just having to work in wet grundies. 212 00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:50,951 Hey, Betty, Wilma. What the hell? You're only 40 minutes late. 213 00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:55,477 - Do I smell beer? - We had a few. 214 00:11:55,560 --> 00:11:58,233 Newsflash: you can't drink and then come to work. 215 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,914 - You're not airline pilots. - Look, Dr Cox... 216 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:04,276 No, you look. If someone had asked me just this morning, 217 00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:06,954 is there any way that I could have any less respect 218 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:10,430 for you two geniuses, I would have said, that's not possible. 219 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:13,432 Lo and behold, you pulled it off. Congratulations. 220 00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:16,159 The only problem is I'm fresh out of blue ribbons, 221 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:17,958 so instead you'll have to settle 222 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:20,600 for a lifetime supply of my foot up your ass. 223 00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:25,594 Go home. You're not fit to work tonight. 224 00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:29,355 Great speech. You guys are in trouble. 225 00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:31,829 Wait up, I've got my heels on. 226 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:39,358 After what happened, I was in no mood to be messed with. 227 00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:41,431 Hey, Food Stamps. 228 00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:43,758 Little anonymous donation 229 00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:47,150 from a guy who makes a little more scratch than you. 230 00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,754 You know what? At least what I do matters. OK? 231 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:52,593 You're cleaning the same spot you were this morning. 232 00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:55,478 The smart money says you'll be cleaning it tomorrow. 233 00:12:55,560 --> 00:12:57,152 Why don't I just come by then, 234 00:12:57,240 --> 00:12:59,879 and you can tell me how what you do day after day 235 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:03,316 makes even the slightest bit of difference in this world? 236 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:07,394 Too mean. 237 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:11,189 I don't care if I hurt his feelings, I got absolutely crushed tonight. 238 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:14,431 Turk and I both knew who was responsible for all this. 239 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:18,679 Crockett. 240 00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:20,557 Tubbs. 241 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,558 When do we eat? 242 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:27,394 Jordan, could you just give me ten seconds to myself here? 243 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,479 No. 244 00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:33,437 You know, you are being very immature 245 00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:35,670 and, oh, my God, is that guy on fire? 246 00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:43,760 Dr Cox, I'm so glad you're here. 247 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:45,956 From one hell to another. 248 00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:48,076 Dr Kelso's been torturing me lately. 249 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,720 I thought I could handle it. I've come a long way. 250 00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:53,155 I was afraid of you, and now I can talk to you, 251 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:56,198 like how your hair's been looking springy lately, 252 00:13:56,280 --> 00:13:58,953 not like the season, like the inside of a mattress. 253 00:13:59,040 --> 00:14:01,679 I don't have any clue what you mean. 254 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,231 Dr Kelso's starting to get to me, 255 00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:10,356 and I don't think I can take it anymore. 256 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:14,274 Sorry, kid, but I'm dealing with my own stuff right now. 257 00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:16,828 Thanks a lot... really. 258 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,595 Howdy, Mop-Top. 259 00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:26,871 Oh, God. 260 00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:29,315 Man, why'd you even show up this weekend? 261 00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:32,949 What are you talking about? I introduced Schmitty and Dan. 262 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,554 OK, I didn't really introduce them. 263 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:39,269 I'm the one who accidentally saw them under the foosball table. 264 00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:41,833 Oh, Schmitty. 265 00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:43,433 Typical Spence. 266 00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:46,193 You just blow into town and get us into trouble. 267 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:48,555 What? I made you guys go out tonight? 268 00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:51,029 Hey, I have a presentation on Thursday. 269 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,588 Ask me if I'll go out drinking Wednesday night. 270 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:55,671 - You wanna go out...? - Sorry. 271 00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:58,115 I can't, I have a presentation. 272 00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:00,794 The truth is, you've been complaining about work 273 00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:04,270 since the second I got here, dying for an excuse to blow it off. 274 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:07,318 So maybe you should stop being all mad at me when, really, 275 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:10,392 you're just pissed because you hate your jobs. 276 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:15,395 Every time I turn around, Kelso's there. 277 00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:17,471 Ted, he's trying to break my spirit. 278 00:15:17,560 --> 00:15:20,154 Do you have any idea what that feels like? 279 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,389 I'm sorry. Of course you do. 280 00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:26,552 Dr Reid, I'm afraid that nothing you've described 281 00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:28,198 constitutes harassment. 282 00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:30,271 Swing and a miss, eh, Dr Reid? 283 00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:33,193 The next time you decide to make a stink over nothing, 284 00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:35,953 you should see a lawyer who didn't need five tries 285 00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:37,598 to pass the bar exam. 286 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:42,959 I have stress-induced dyslexia and you know that, Dr Oslek. 287 00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:48,551 - Why are you doing this? - I'll tell you why, Perry. 288 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:51,200 We've been dancing the same dance for years now. 289 00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:52,918 One gets angry and walks away, 290 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,195 the other's too stubborn to go after them. 291 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:58,477 Before you know it, you sleep with some pharmaceutical rep, 292 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:01,358 I'm convincing my mom that the thing in my suitcase 293 00:16:01,440 --> 00:16:04,398 is a giant electric melon-baller. Guess what? 294 00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:07,677 Things are different now. We have a kid together. 295 00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:11,389 I'm not going home until you promise you're coming with me. 296 00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:22,513 You go home. I'll meet you there later. 297 00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:24,192 Bring dinner. 298 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:29,034 You're a father. Can you believe it? 299 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:34,308 Nope. 300 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:41,148 I didn't get a lot of sleep thinking about what Spence had said. 301 00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:46,950 Look, I'm sorry I was such a jerk yesterday. OK? 302 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:50,430 Come on, look at this floor. You could practically eat off of it. 303 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:53,118 - Would you? - Would I what? 304 00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:54,952 Would you eat off the floor? 305 00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:00,759 As I bent down to eat that peppered floor turkey, 306 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:03,195 unaware that the cleanser the janitor uses 307 00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:07,637 is an extremely potent diuretic, I realised something. 308 00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:10,075 The reason we're doctors is because we have 309 00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:12,151 an innate desire to help people. 310 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,231 That was disgusting. 311 00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:18,912 You have to have that desire, 312 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:21,036 because at the end of your second year, 313 00:17:21,120 --> 00:17:24,430 it's impossible to see the light at the end of the tunnel. 314 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:26,715 So it becomes about perseverance. 315 00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:31,398 And fortitude. 316 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:36,991 And sacrifice. 317 00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:39,196 Sorry you guys can't make the wedding. 318 00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:40,679 Give them a big kiss for us. 319 00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:43,479 Tell them the ferret only eats fresh vegetables. 320 00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:45,551 I'm gonna miss you guys. 321 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,591 - I'll see ya later. - Later, dude. 322 00:17:53,040 --> 00:17:56,077 Really, all you can hope for is an occasional thank-you. 323 00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:58,071 I'm so glad the medication worked. 324 00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:01,232 I'm supposed to be happy cos somebody did something right? 325 00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:02,469 You're welcome. 326 00:18:02,560 --> 00:18:04,755 Nice call on the anti-seizure medicine. 327 00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:08,833 I'm starting to think you may not be the worst resident that ever lived. 328 00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:12,795 - How cool was that? - Shut up. 329 00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:14,996 You shut up. You're an angry man. 330 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:21,032 Sorry I didn't tell you about the "It's your baby" thing. 331 00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:23,190 We'll probably talk about that later. 332 00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:26,192 - I wasn't even mad at Jordan. - No? 333 00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:27,759 I was scared. 334 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:32,118 I was freaking out, cos I'm confident that I'll be a horrible father. 335 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:33,792 You? Come on. 336 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:36,269 You're gonna be a very scary... I mean, great. 337 00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,998 You're gonna be a great father. 338 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:41,277 Last night, you totally kicked our asses cos we deserved it. 339 00:18:41,360 --> 00:18:44,750 Remember you told me I wasn't the worst resident that ever lived? 340 00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:46,034 Eight seconds ago? 341 00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:48,475 You have no idea how much that meant to me. 342 00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:51,597 I said, I think you may not be the worst resident ever, 343 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:55,195 but I can't be sure of stuff like that. I haven't done the legwork. 344 00:18:55,280 --> 00:18:57,236 You're always there when we need you. 345 00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:59,709 I think you have this fathering thing down. 346 00:18:59,800 --> 00:19:01,791 Why am I not leaving, Dr Reid? 347 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:03,836 I don't want to miss you breaking down 348 00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:05,717 and weeping in front of everyone. 349 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:10,920 Here it comes. Great big tears. Great big crocodile tears. 350 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:14,993 If she was your daughter, you'd totally know how to handle it. 351 00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,917 My God, you're right. 352 00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:29,516 - You're doing fine, Barbie. - Thank you. 353 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:31,875 Everybody have a good one. 354 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:34,030 I'm going home to see my son. 355 00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:37,996 Excuse me there, Bobbo. 356 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,675 Right in the nose. Yeah. 357 00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:01,951 That may come up tomorrow.