1
00:00:01,500 --> 00:00:03,447
As a doctor, it's important
to know how to make small talk.

2
00:00:03,868 --> 00:00:05,765
Mr. Bober, what would you
like with your turkey sandwich?

3
00:00:06,113 --> 00:00:06,442
Pickles!

4
00:00:07,017 --> 00:00:08,924
...Of course, it's harder if your patient suffers
from dementia and can only say one word....

5
00:00:09,418 --> 00:00:11,036
And to drink?

6
00:00:11,370 --> 00:00:11,968
Pickles!

7
00:00:12,723 --> 00:00:15,527
And now, for a thousand dollars
and this bag of I.V. fluid,

8
00:00:15,967 --> 00:00:18,218
which is guaranteed to make you feel
like you're a hundred and ninety again,

9
00:00:18,219 --> 00:00:20,419
What did Peter Piper pick a peck of?

10
00:00:21,151 --> 00:00:21,638
Pickles.

11
00:00:21,639 --> 00:00:26,091
Oooooooh! I'm sorry, Mr. Bober!
The correct answer is _peppers_.

12
00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:28,726
"Peter Piper picked a
peck of pickled _peppers_."

13
00:00:29,064 --> 00:00:29,625
NEWBIE!

14
00:00:30,921 --> 00:00:33,090
Did I just walk in on you
mocking an innocent patient!?

15
00:00:33,091 --> 00:00:34,124
Yes....

16
00:00:34,125 --> 00:00:35,822
I've never felt closer to you.

17
00:00:35,823 --> 00:00:39,160
But see, this is just exactly
what's wrong with the whole system

18
00:00:39,161 --> 00:00:42,251
the nursing home doctors
unload this gomer on us because

19
00:00:42,252 --> 00:00:45,140
they're unable to treat him. So, we
get his temperature below a hundred,

20
00:00:45,141 --> 00:00:48,586
and then turf him right back to the
good people at Next Stop, Heaven,

21
00:00:48,587 --> 00:00:51,394
where, in between mounting wheelchair
productions of "Anything Goes"

22
00:00:51,395 --> 00:00:54,749
and robbing the poor old bastards
blind, they bounce him right back to us!

23
00:00:54,750 --> 00:00:59,794
Well, on the plus side, his temperature's
99.9, so...Sayonara, Mr. Bober!

24
00:00:59,795 --> 00:01:04,644
Oh, I could just give you a
hug! Of course, I never would!

25
00:01:04,645 --> 00:01:09,232
I could, but I never would,
God save me! I never would...

26
00:01:09,233 --> 00:01:12,639
Eh, no biggie. 'Cause here comes my
dream girl with a smile just for me.

27
00:01:15,059 --> 00:01:17,065
J.D.... You know what I love?

28
00:01:17,066 --> 00:01:17,834
What?

29
00:01:17,835 --> 00:01:19,093
My boyfriend Sean.

30
00:01:21,078 --> 00:01:23,655
And that's when I made one of the biggest
mistakes I've made in some time....

31
00:01:26,230 --> 00:01:29,142
I'm really bummed out about Elliot.
I just needed someone to talk to.

32
00:01:29,143 --> 00:01:30,477
I called my brother.

33
00:01:31,501 --> 00:01:33,491
Yeah, boo-frickin'-hoo.
Listen, I'm so glad you called.

34
00:01:33,492 --> 00:01:35,398
You know how Mom's getting
married again for the seventh time?

35
00:01:35,399 --> 00:01:37,366
Well, this is turning into
such a hassle for me....

36
00:01:38,627 --> 00:01:41,937
And with that, I had reopened the door
that I had successfully closed years ago.

37
00:01:44,384 --> 00:01:47,700
Yes, Dan, I got your eleven messages.
Now, because you're my brother,

38
00:01:47,701 --> 00:01:50,546
I'm gonna put this
nicely: Leave me alone.

39
00:01:50,547 --> 00:01:52,419
This whole Mom thing doesn't bother you?

40
00:01:52,420 --> 00:01:56,215
Yes, it's killing me. So much
so that I have to go, okay?

41
00:01:56,216 --> 00:01:58,183
All right, buddy. I'll see you soon.

42
00:02:01,265 --> 00:02:01,937
Real soon.

43
00:02:01,938 --> 00:02:04,009
Wait! Dan! Hoog!

44
00:02:05,850 --> 00:02:06,331
'Sup, Dan.

45
00:02:06,332 --> 00:02:09,315
Christopher! Looks like we have
the makings of a dog-pile here.

46
00:02:09,316 --> 00:02:10,276
Turk, don't.

47
00:02:10,277 --> 00:02:11,835
Sorry, dude. I gotta!

48
00:02:16,015 --> 00:02:16,846
I miss Sean.

49
00:02:18,535 --> 00:02:19,519
This long-distance thing is killing me.

50
00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:21,316
Well, are you having phone-sex?

51
00:02:21,317 --> 00:02:23,527
Uhhh, gross!

52
00:02:24,776 --> 00:02:26,725
...Have you and Turk ever done it?

53
00:02:26,726 --> 00:02:29,084
Last year, when he went home for
the holidays, I gave him a call.

54
00:02:30,061 --> 00:02:32,727
You'd be surprised at how much Turk's
eleven-year-old nephew sounds like him

55
00:02:32,728 --> 00:02:34,051
...and how worldly he is.

56
00:02:36,355 --> 00:02:37,787
Yeah, well I'm not comfortable
doing it here, anyway.

57
00:02:37,788 --> 00:02:40,389
I mean, these walls are so thin, that guy
next door listens to every single thing I say.

58
00:02:40,390 --> 00:02:43,814
Yeah, I can hear you, there, breathing!

59
00:02:48,874 --> 00:02:49,739
You sick bastard!

60
00:02:50,782 --> 00:02:52,827
Look, you just need to find a place
where you're not so self-conscious.

61
00:02:57,245 --> 00:03:02,173
Hi, Sweetie. Are you naked? ... Okay,
ummm, now imagine me taking off my shirt

62
00:03:02,174 --> 00:03:06,650
and kissing down your neck and--
Can you hear me? Sean? ... Good.

63
00:03:06,651 --> 00:03:12,000
Okay, now I'm at your chest and
my tongue starts-- Are you there?

64
00:03:12,001 --> 00:03:16,248
Good, because now I am
licking your nipples all over.

65
00:03:16,249 --> 00:03:20,496
Your nipples. ... Nipples,
Sean! I'm licking your nipples!

66
00:03:20,497 --> 00:03:22,430
Look, Oliver!

67
00:03:24,863 --> 00:03:26,344
I don't care how close you
are! I'll call you later!

68
00:03:30,579 --> 00:03:32,619
Dude, we have to get my brother out
of here -- he's driving me crazy.

69
00:03:33,888 --> 00:03:36,087
I did not -- repeat, did not --
just drop a toothbrush in the toilet.

70
00:03:36,618 --> 00:03:37,356
Was it blue?

71
00:03:37,644 --> 00:03:38,160
Yellow.

72
00:03:39,434 --> 00:03:41,217
Oh, don't sweat it. So, Mrs.
D.'s getting remarried, huh?

73
00:03:43,099 --> 00:03:46,718
To a loser! Total loser. This guy's
making me move out of Mom's attic.

74
00:03:46,719 --> 00:03:47,423
Oh, the audacity.

75
00:03:47,967 --> 00:03:50,997
I know. But you know what? This is gonna be
great. You know, this reminds me of the time

76
00:03:51,248 --> 00:03:52,336
I came down to see you guys
when you were in med school...

77
00:03:52,556 --> 00:03:55,121
Oh! And I hooked up with that slutty
chick! Remember, the one with the huge cans?

78
00:03:55,890 --> 00:03:56,653
What was her name?

79
00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:57,511
Amy.

80
00:03:57,921 --> 00:03:58,901
Yeah! How do you
remember stuff like that?

81
00:03:58,902 --> 00:03:59,730
She was my girlfriend.

82
00:03:59,731 --> 00:04:00,837
Right.

83
00:04:01,372 --> 00:04:02,539
You got her number?

84
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:03,396
No.

85
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:11,074
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.

86
00:04:15,899 --> 00:04:19,076
Hey! Hey! Check this out! Turk and I
have been working on our harmonizing.

87
00:04:19,077 --> 00:04:22,006
A-one, a-two,
a-one, two three:

88
00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:26,664
Haunting.

89
00:04:26,665 --> 00:04:29,196
You've always had the talent,
little brother. You get in on this,

90
00:04:29,197 --> 00:04:30,240
and we could take this on the road!

91
00:04:42,207 --> 00:04:43,035
I love the theatre....

92
00:04:43,036 --> 00:04:44,567
Ah! Come to papa!

93
00:04:46,749 --> 00:04:48,401
Turk! Can you please not put
your skivvies in the freezer!?

94
00:04:49,169 --> 00:04:50,660
I'm sick of my popsicles
tasting like fabric softener!

95
00:04:51,554 --> 00:04:54,335
I like my bad boys
to stay nice and cold.

96
00:04:55,117 --> 00:04:56,517
Make sure you're nice and
dry down there, otherwise

97
00:04:56,518 --> 00:04:58,593
you get a tongue-on-the-flagpole
situation -- you don't want that.

98
00:04:59,601 --> 00:05:00,538
Ahhhhhh!

99
00:05:00,539 --> 00:05:04,281
This is a stimulating conversation.
I can't imagine why Mom's new husband

100
00:05:04,282 --> 00:05:05,408
doesn't want you in the house.

101
00:05:05,918 --> 00:05:07,847
Me neither! And you know what,
J.D.? I'm worried, 'cause I think

102
00:05:07,848 --> 00:05:09,302
this marriage might actually stick.

103
00:05:09,303 --> 00:05:11,728
...Unlike Mom and Dad, who tried
to solve everything with sex.

104
00:05:11,729 --> 00:05:12,896
They did?

105
00:05:12,897 --> 00:05:15,581
Oh, yeah, yeah. Matter of fact,
the only reason you were born is

106
00:05:15,582 --> 00:05:16,963
'cause Mom bounced a
check at the market.

107
00:05:16,964 --> 00:05:20,119
Oh, that's great! I--I guess you're
only here because Mom wrecked the car?

108
00:05:21,072 --> 00:05:21,792
No, they wanted me.

109
00:05:25,584 --> 00:05:29,571
Hey! My nephew just asked what you're
wearing today. How cute is that?

110
00:05:31,034 --> 00:05:32,095
Not as cute as you think.

111
00:05:33,062 --> 00:05:33,540
Hey.

112
00:05:33,541 --> 00:05:36,626
Carla.... I've gotta scrape
some cash together to see Sean.

113
00:05:36,627 --> 00:05:42,139
Okay, everyone, listen up: It came
to my attention that Dr. Brogan here

114
00:05:42,140 --> 00:05:47,270
has been moonlighting over at County Medical.
Now, if he were to kill someone over there, great;

115
00:05:47,271 --> 00:05:50,800
but if he were to make a mistake here because of
how tired he was from working at his other job,

116
00:05:50,801 --> 00:05:54,786
then my hospital would be liable.
So, Ted, why don't you tell everyone

117
00:05:54,787 --> 00:05:56,941
what my policy on moonlighting is.

118
00:05:56,942 --> 00:05:59,444
No...moonlighting.

119
00:05:59,445 --> 00:06:02,836
Now, Dr. Brogan will be suspended
_without pay_ for one week,

120
00:06:02,837 --> 00:06:06,865
but on the plus side, he gets to run
around in my backyard wearing a foam suit

121
00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:10,884
so I can see if my dog Baxter's
attack classes were worth the money!

122
00:06:10,885 --> 00:06:12,123
Is my message clear?

123
00:06:12,124 --> 00:06:13,178
Yeah, uh-huh.

124
00:06:13,179 --> 00:06:13,641
Yes, sir.

125
00:06:13,642 --> 00:06:14,073
Uh-huh.

126
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:14,488
Absolutely, sir. Absolutely.

127
00:06:14,489 --> 00:06:14,958
No moonlighting, sir!

128
00:06:18,124 --> 00:06:19,237
So, where do you guys moonlight?

129
00:06:20,125 --> 00:06:20,553
Insurance physicals.

130
00:06:20,554 --> 00:06:21,388
Free clinic.

131
00:06:21,389 --> 00:06:24,256
Mammogram-mobile. Well, not officially
-- I just got the offer today

132
00:06:24,257 --> 00:06:27,259
but I'd make more money than I do
now, riding around in an ambulance,

133
00:06:27,260 --> 00:06:30,295
and even though I'll be handling
breasts all day, my beautiful fiancee,

134
00:06:30,296 --> 00:06:32,199
who is very secure
with the--will let me--

135
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:35,367
I ride around in an ambulance.

136
00:06:39,599 --> 00:06:42,516
Dan wanted to come with me to work today, but I
told him it would make me a little uncomfortable.

137
00:06:43,652 --> 00:06:44,185
He was okay with it.

138
00:06:44,186 --> 00:06:48,349
Now, I heard there's a bed in the on-call
room. You ever get, uh, hot & heavy in there?

139
00:06:48,350 --> 00:06:50,030
Nah, usually I'm in there by myself.

140
00:06:50,031 --> 00:06:51,257
So, yes.

141
00:06:51,258 --> 00:06:54,327
Listen, uh, my buddy Wayne lives
a couple miles upstate, and so,

142
00:06:54,328 --> 00:06:57,159
uh, he's got himself a new bumper pool
table -- I'm gonna be taking off tonight.

143
00:06:57,160 --> 00:06:58,134
Oh, thank God.

144
00:06:58,135 --> 00:07:00,783
Dr. Cox! You remember my brother Dan?

145
00:07:00,784 --> 00:07:01,828
Whatta ya say, Coxy!

146
00:07:03,147 --> 00:07:03,493
Nothing!

147
00:07:03,494 --> 00:07:04,616
That's a first.

148
00:07:04,617 --> 00:07:06,170
This is my boss, Dan.

149
00:07:06,171 --> 00:07:09,288
You know what a boss is: For you,
that would be the seventeen-year-old

150
00:07:09,289 --> 00:07:12,184
that tells you to clean out the grease-trap
after you've filled all the ketchups.

151
00:07:12,185 --> 00:07:13,329
Oh, my ribs!

152
00:07:13,330 --> 00:07:14,913
Uh, Dan, why don't you
go get a snack cake?

153
00:07:14,914 --> 00:07:15,926
Snack cake.

154
00:07:15,927 --> 00:07:19,562
Uh, Dr. Cox, Dan was wondering if
he could trail with us today....

155
00:07:19,563 --> 00:07:24,622
Good God in heaven, Newbie, there are just so
very many ways for me to say this to you: Never;

156
00:07:24,623 --> 00:07:29,244
not in a million years; absolutely not;
no way, Jose; no chance, Lance; niet;

157
00:07:29,245 --> 00:07:32,764
negatory; mm-mm; nuh-uh; oh-oh; and of
course my own personal favorite of all time,

158
00:07:32,765 --> 00:07:34,733
man falling off
of a cliff --

159
00:07:34,734 --> 00:07:42,432
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!..."

160
00:07:42,433 --> 00:07:43,675
Look, Dr. Cox...

161
00:07:45,302 --> 00:07:46,018
..."Pff."

162
00:07:47,568 --> 00:07:48,778
I just want to say, thank you.

163
00:07:48,779 --> 00:07:52,542
Hold the phone. You don't
want him to come with us?

164
00:07:52,543 --> 00:07:55,269
"Nooooooooo..." Heh. "Poof." Heh.

165
00:07:55,270 --> 00:07:57,562
Dan? Come!

166
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,853
Thanks a lot, Turk! I didn't get that mammogram-mobile
job because they said you took it after all!

167
00:08:06,651 --> 00:08:06,984
What!?

168
00:08:06,985 --> 00:08:10,650
Yes, I took it! But, it pays better,
and we both know that this job

169
00:08:10,651 --> 00:08:13,363
is about helping women detect
breast cancer, and nothing more!

170
00:08:13,364 --> 00:08:16,395
Now, if you'll excuse
me, I'm late for work.

171
00:08:17,874 --> 00:08:20,255
Well, have fun! 'Cause you'll
never see "the girls" again!

172
00:08:22,324 --> 00:08:25,085
Hey, Elliot, the place where I moonlight
pays pretty well. I can call them for you.

173
00:08:25,808 --> 00:08:26,421
Cool! What's the gig?

174
00:08:27,759 --> 00:08:30,080
It's great. It's just emergency patch
and fix work -- it's no different

175
00:08:30,081 --> 00:08:31,915
than treating a patient
at our hospital, okay?

176
00:08:31,916 --> 00:08:32,664
Okay.

177
00:08:38,625 --> 00:08:46,388
Oh-ho! Lookie here! Uh, tell me sir, what is it that
brings Dr. Dorian's favorite gomer back to the hospital?

178
00:08:47,046 --> 00:08:47,534
Pickles.

179
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:48,414
Fair enough.

180
00:08:48,894 --> 00:08:49,350
What's a gomer?

181
00:08:49,351 --> 00:08:53,160
A gomer's an old person that takes up room in the
hospital and doesn't have the common decency to die.

182
00:08:55,432 --> 00:08:57,417
See, now that's just
rude is what that is.

183
00:08:57,418 --> 00:08:59,949
Well, I'm sorry, dude, I don't--I
don't have time for pickles right now.

184
00:08:59,950 --> 00:09:02,743
I got three vegetables and a drug addict who's
gonna tell me this time things'll be different,

185
00:09:02,744 --> 00:09:04,012
then try to take my watch again.

186
00:09:05,022 --> 00:09:05,501
Dammit!

187
00:09:05,502 --> 00:09:09,681
Can't we just, you know, put a pillow over
his head and put him out of his misery?

188
00:09:09,682 --> 00:09:13,933
Not gonna be necessary, seeing as how his
temperature is below a hundred. Take him away.

189
00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:24,626
So, Dr. Cox, how long has my little brother
had the desire to smother old people?

190
00:09:24,627 --> 00:09:25,993
I feel I should warn Grandma.

191
00:09:26,696 --> 00:09:29,704
Gonna sound a little dark, but in all fairness
you gotta deal with this place any way you can.

192
00:09:29,705 --> 00:09:32,122
Dude, these are living, breathing
people we're talking about here.

193
00:09:32,123 --> 00:09:34,094
I'm s--I'm s--I'm sorry,
I'm sorry, what do you do?

194
00:09:34,095 --> 00:09:35,107
I tend bar.

195
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:36,901
Well, I'll tell you what, there, Dan

196
00:09:36,902 --> 00:09:39,626
I'm gonna go ahead and worry
about how we do things around here.

197
00:09:39,627 --> 00:09:42,776
But if I ever do need to find out
how to make a top-notch rum and coke,

198
00:09:42,777 --> 00:09:47,028
well, by gum, mister, you had better be by the
phone, cause I just might give you a jingle.

199
00:09:47,029 --> 00:09:55,508
Ba-ha-rrrri-hing! Hi, Dan? Coxaronie. Regarding
the rum and coke issue -- couldn't be more confused!

200
00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:01,477
Okay, we have another dog coming in. Do
you want him or the four cats next door?

201
00:10:01,478 --> 00:10:04,879
Oh, I'll go with the dog. I don't
know what it is, but all cats hate me.

202
00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:07,082
I mean, if I even make eye
contact with them, they freak out.

203
00:10:08,102 --> 00:10:08,319
Okay.

204
00:10:18,105 --> 00:10:22,762
Agggghhhh! Stupid kitty!
Hey! Get off me! Stupid cats!

205
00:10:23,757 --> 00:10:24,790
YOU ALL SUCK!

206
00:10:27,009 --> 00:10:27,476
Hi, sir.

207
00:10:32,427 --> 00:10:35,980
Well, Dan, what can I say.
It's been, uh, three days....

208
00:10:35,981 --> 00:10:36,802
Two days.

209
00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:41,804
Feels like three. But, uh, say hi to Wayne,
and good luck in the bumper pool tournament.

210
00:10:41,805 --> 00:10:43,626
Yeah, actually, J.D., I
don't think I'm leaving.

211
00:10:43,627 --> 00:10:44,528
Why!?

212
00:10:44,529 --> 00:10:48,776
Well, 'cause I'm worried about
you. I mean, hanging with you today

213
00:10:48,777 --> 00:10:50,894
and watching you work, with the
gomer talk and all the attitude now,

214
00:10:50,895 --> 00:10:53,917
I'm not so sure I like the guy you're turning
into. It's definitely not my little brother.

215
00:10:53,918 --> 00:10:59,436
You know what, Dan, once Dad left and Mom
started marrying everyone that rang the doorbell,

216
00:10:59,437 --> 00:11:02,815
I remember someone saying how lucky
I was to have an older brother.

217
00:11:02,816 --> 00:11:08,674
But you never came through for me once,
did you. I mean, I called you for help

218
00:11:08,675 --> 00:11:10,981
because I'm in love with a girl who's in
love with someone else, and you responded

219
00:11:10,982 --> 00:11:14,350
by showing up here, drinking all my
Bailey's Irish Cream, and whining about

220
00:11:14,351 --> 00:11:19,349
Mom's new boyfriend. You are a self-involved
user, Dan. And you wanna tell _me_

221
00:11:19,350 --> 00:11:25,524
what kind of person to be? I tell you what, instead,
why don't you just get the hell out of my life?

222
00:11:25,545 --> 00:11:28,407
But we're brothers. That
counts for something, right?

223
00:11:30,128 --> 00:11:30,661
Not to me.

224
00:11:46,214 --> 00:11:49,525
Whenever there's an argument in my family, it's a
time-honored tradition to pretend nothing happened.

225
00:11:52,536 --> 00:11:53,491
How are your chocolate chip
flapjacks, little brother?

226
00:11:53,492 --> 00:11:54,649
Chocolate chippity good!

227
00:11:54,650 --> 00:11:55,875
More whipped cream, Christopher?

228
00:11:55,876 --> 00:11:56,656
Bring it!

229
00:11:59,618 --> 00:12:01,893
I just want to say before I hit the
road, it's been great hanging with you;

230
00:12:01,894 --> 00:12:04,808
and Johnny, I know I don't say
this nearly enough, but, um--

231
00:12:04,809 --> 00:12:09,722
Ooh, coffee's kicking in. I'll be
back in just under four minutes.

232
00:12:11,362 --> 00:12:14,965
Look, Carla, I cannot afford to be suspended
right now. I'm gonna have to resort to blackmail.

233
00:12:14,966 --> 00:12:16,462
How are we gonna blackmail Kelso?

234
00:12:17,728 --> 00:12:21,364
No, no, no, no, no! Unless you take the fall for both
of us, I'm telling Turk you're sleeping with someone.

235
00:12:21,365 --> 00:12:22,997
Relax, Elliot. I have a secret weapon!

236
00:12:25,616 --> 00:12:26,359
You saw nothing!

237
00:12:30,017 --> 00:12:33,267
Hey, thanks for loaning me this shirt, man.
I got a lot of compliments from the sistas.

238
00:12:33,268 --> 00:12:35,815
Sharon the security guard
even called me a cracka!

239
00:12:36,953 --> 00:12:39,145
Dude, how many time I gotta
tell you? Cracker -- bad!

240
00:12:39,146 --> 00:12:42,671
Besides, why aren't you at home, apologizing
to your brother before he takes off?

241
00:12:42,672 --> 00:12:45,602
Turk, you don't get it, man.
Your family was there for you.

242
00:12:45,603 --> 00:12:49,785
You know, I love how kids of divorce really
have the market cornered on family dysfunction.

243
00:12:49,786 --> 00:12:53,034
But let me share with you a typical
Thanksgiving at the Turk household:

244
00:12:53,035 --> 00:12:56,514
It starts with my mother yelling at
my sister for yelling at my grandmother

245
00:12:56,515 --> 00:12:59,262
who's yelling at the television screen,
which happens to be the microwave.

246
00:12:59,263 --> 00:13:02,797
And then my militant brother Jabari --
formerly Bob -- gives my father attitude

247
00:13:02,798 --> 00:13:05,619
for using the word "black", even
though he's referring to the turkey.

248
00:13:05,620 --> 00:13:08,231
Which, by the way, only got burnt
because instead of turning the oven off,

249
00:13:08,232 --> 00:13:10,689
my bi-polar aunt Leslie
tried to shove her head in it.

250
00:13:10,690 --> 00:13:17,030
But you know what we do? We kiss...and we
hug...and we apologize for all the things we said...

251
00:13:18,103 --> 00:13:20,399
'Cause a month later, we gonna get
together and do it again at Christmas!

252
00:13:22,580 --> 00:13:24,198
Now check the ball, cracka!

253
00:13:28,257 --> 00:13:29,408
One-nothing.

254
00:13:31,613 --> 00:13:32,391
You're home now.

255
00:13:33,624 --> 00:13:35,174
Okay, I paged Dr. Kelso.

256
00:13:36,178 --> 00:13:37,318
Do you feel confident about this, Ted?

257
00:13:38,201 --> 00:13:40,273
I'm not sure. I don't know
what confidence feels like.

258
00:13:41,314 --> 00:13:42,833
Good afternoon, suspendees, Ted.

259
00:13:42,834 --> 00:13:45,758
Guess who's back from
the vet! One, two, three!

260
00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:47,746
What a boy!

261
00:13:49,466 --> 00:13:52,463
Sir, about Nurse Espinosa
and Dr. Reid's suspensions,

262
00:13:52,978 --> 00:13:55,550
really there aren't any grounds
to punish them for moonlighting,

263
00:13:55,724 --> 00:13:58,350
because they weren't working
with people -- just animals.

264
00:13:58,351 --> 00:14:02,490
"Just animals"? Oh, please, this
dog is smarter than most people.

265
00:14:02,491 --> 00:14:04,780
He's definitely smarter than _you_.

266
00:14:04,781 --> 00:14:06,231
Sir, I
don't think--

267
00:14:06,579 --> 00:14:07,560
Baxter, sit!

268
00:14:08,784 --> 00:14:09,669
Ted, sit!

269
00:14:11,341 --> 00:14:12,321
Ted, you don't have to!

270
00:14:13,288 --> 00:14:14,191
Shut up! I can win this!

271
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:15,767
Baxter, speak!

272
00:14:17,146 --> 00:14:17,962
Ted, speak!

273
00:14:18,470 --> 00:14:19,322
Hellooooooooo!

274
00:14:20,474 --> 00:14:21,446
Baxter, left foot!

275
00:14:22,742 --> 00:14:23,630
Ted, left hand!

276
00:14:24,998 --> 00:14:25,806
Left hand, Ted.

277
00:14:27,014 --> 00:14:28,062
Hellooooooooooo!

278
00:14:29,059 --> 00:14:31,610
Baxter wins! He gets
the desk. Baxter, go up!

279
00:14:36,620 --> 00:14:41,241
Gah! Those are
definitely broken! Why did you do that!?

280
00:14:42,745 --> 00:14:43,233
Gee, I dunno.

281
00:14:44,278 --> 00:14:44,725
Who are you?

282
00:14:44,726 --> 00:14:46,337
Waiting for my brother.

283
00:14:46,338 --> 00:14:47,412
Hey, Dan.

284
00:14:47,413 --> 00:14:50,189
Well, isn't that perfect. You send your
brother in to do the dirty work, huh?

285
00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:52,370
And with an open fly, no less!

286
00:14:53,833 --> 00:14:57,459
Made you look. A
two-fer! Emergency Room?

287
00:14:57,460 --> 00:14:58,427
That way.

288
00:15:00,363 --> 00:15:01,368
So, you...taking off?

289
00:15:01,369 --> 00:15:02,336
Yeah.

290
00:15:02,337 --> 00:15:05,363
Look, um, Dan...I wanna
apologize for everything I said.

291
00:15:05,364 --> 00:15:08,673
For what it's worth, I
really like having you around.

292
00:15:08,674 --> 00:15:09,780
No you don't.

293
00:15:09,781 --> 00:15:12,437
I know. I have dreams where I
staple your fingers to your face.

294
00:15:13,582 --> 00:15:17,210
But, honestly, you're my brother; you
can crash at my place as long as you like.

295
00:15:17,211 --> 00:15:20,377
That's okay. I'll see you
back home at Christmas.

296
00:15:31,378 --> 00:15:32,036
Why are you here.

297
00:15:32,037 --> 00:15:35,129
My boyfriend is in New Zealand for
six months, and if I don't moonlight,

298
00:15:35,130 --> 00:15:36,742
then I'm never gonna have
enough money to see him.

299
00:15:36,743 --> 00:15:39,973
My wedding's costing twice as much as I
thought it would, and I need the extra cash.

300
00:15:40,870 --> 00:15:42,311
Baxter won't get out of my chair.

301
00:15:43,682 --> 00:15:46,844
Dr. Kelso, even though we're
understaffed and underpaid,

302
00:15:46,845 --> 00:15:50,571
I've been working here for ten
years! I mean, all day long?

303
00:15:50,572 --> 00:15:58,133
All I hear is "Carla, Carla, Carla,
Carla, Carla, Carla, Carla, Carla, ad lib"

304
00:15:58,134 --> 00:16:02,424
Sir, what--wh--what Carla is saying,
and not in any kind of crazy or, uh,

305
00:16:02,425 --> 00:16:07,760
rambling sort of way, is that we work hard here at
the hospital, but it's not the only thing in our lives.

306
00:16:07,761 --> 00:16:12,016
Surely you must know what it's like to love
someone so much that you'd do anything you had to.

307
00:16:14,486 --> 00:16:18,819
I'll see you two in the morning. Now get
out of my office before I change my mind.

308
00:16:25,822 --> 00:16:29,613
Darling, I wanna say something. For
the past 25 years, we've been going

309
00:16:29,614 --> 00:16:32,864
through the motions -- once every
couple of weeks we have sex, and then

310
00:16:32,865 --> 00:16:37,862
we have breakfast without saying a word. Well,
tonight, I want you to put on a nice dress,

311
00:16:37,863 --> 00:16:41,874
because I'm gonna take you to dinner and
I'm gonna start telling you all the things

312
00:16:41,875 --> 00:16:48,133
I haven't taken the time to say all
these years. ... I love you, too.

313
00:16:50,466 --> 00:16:52,440
That was...beautiful, sir!

314
00:16:52,441 --> 00:16:55,651
Thanks, Ted. Call my wife, tell
her I won't be home tonight.

315
00:17:02,725 --> 00:17:03,423
Hey, Dr. Cox.

316
00:17:05,328 --> 00:17:07,733
Oh, here I'd been told
you left. It made me happy.

317
00:17:08,733 --> 00:17:11,784
Yeah, you don't like me. People don't
like me. You know why? I'm a screw-up;

318
00:17:11,785 --> 00:17:16,415
always have been. For instance, when we were
kids, Mom would always make me walk Johnny

319
00:17:16,416 --> 00:17:20,808
to school first day every year. Every year,
I'd walk him to the wrong school! Just 'cause!

320
00:17:22,371 --> 00:17:26,764
Boy, that's a great story, really. And I'm
sure you were just a horrible big brother--

321
00:17:26,765 --> 00:17:27,603
Well...

322
00:17:27,604 --> 00:17:30,490
-
-but I'm afraid you have me confused with somebody who gives a crap.

323
00:17:30,491 --> 00:17:33,709
And it's okay, you don't need to be
embarrassed, turns out it happens all the time.

324
00:17:33,710 --> 00:17:37,445
For instance, my father actually made
the same mistake on his death bed.

325
00:17:37,446 --> 00:17:41,656
Hey, listen,   No offense, I'm
a big fan of the tough-guy act,

326
00:17:41,657 --> 00:17:46,534
but let me tell you what I really think. I think
you love the fact that these kids idolize you.

327
00:17:46,535 --> 00:17:52,404
Johnny does! Johnny was always the one in the family
we knew was going someplace -- sweet kid, smart kid.

328
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:56,958
Becoming a doctor, this is all he ever
wanted; and yet, somehow, you've found a way

329
00:17:56,959 --> 00:17:59,869
to beat that out of him, haven't you?
Turned him into some cynical guy who seems

330
00:17:59,870 --> 00:18:09,314
to despise what he does. Dr. Cox,
Johnny's never gonna look up to me. Ever.

331
00:18:09,315 --> 00:18:14,496
But he hangs on your every word.
So, I'm askin' -- I'm telling you --

332
00:18:14,497 --> 00:18:17,059
take that responsibility seriously;
stop being such a hard-ass,

333
00:18:17,060 --> 00:18:19,645
otherwise you're gonna
have to answer to me.

334
00:18:19,646 --> 00:18:22,867
Love can give you strength
you never knew you had.

335
00:18:22,868 --> 00:18:25,681
It was good seeing you, Dr. Cox.

336
00:18:28,519 --> 00:18:31,874
Good to see you, Dan. All the best.

337
00:18:40,348 --> 00:18:41,456
Love can also give you courage.

338
00:18:42,445 --> 00:18:45,198
Lots of cats today! Heh!
What's wrong with this guy?

339
00:18:45,199 --> 00:18:47,934
I think he's got something stuck
behind his big, sharp tooth.

340
00:18:53,631 --> 00:18:57,286
As for me, it's enough just to love my brother,
even though I know he'll never come up big for me.

341
00:18:57,287 --> 00:18:59,977
Well, Mr. Pickles, welcome back.

342
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:01,571
Here we go with this guy again.

343
00:19:01,572 --> 00:19:05,831
Yep. Still, it sure is nice
to be doing something you love.

344
00:19:07,483 --> 00:19:09,318
I wouldn't trade it. How 'bout you?

345
00:19:11,791 --> 00:19:12,377
No....

346
00:19:13,285 --> 00:19:14,174
Don't forget that.

347
00:19:17,209 --> 00:19:17,986
Pickles.

348
00:19:17,987 --> 00:19:23,782
Damn right, sir. Damn right.

349
00:19:24,305 --> 00:20:24,391
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