1
00:00:02,360 --> 00:00:03,349
Let me explain.
2
00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,591
Turk and Carla's marriage
was in trouble cos of some dumb stuff
3
00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:10,593
Turk had done, so last night,
I took Carla out to smooth things over.
4
00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:13,670
Long story short, we smooched.
5
00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:17,748
Sorry. Drunken accident.
6
00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:21,869
It was barely more than a friend kiss,
so we decided not to tell Turk.
7
00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:24,598
Or so I thought.
8
00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:26,910
J.D. And I kissed.
9
00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:30,829
Was it a comfortable silence? No.
I'm not gonna be the one who breaks it.
10
00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:33,992
Unfortunately, I have one of
Rowdy's hairs in my mouth.
11
00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:39,997
I guess there's a lot of things
that can knock you on your arse.
12
00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:43,517
For instance, when your 17-year-old
neighbour doesn't see you
13
00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:45,033
as a smoking hottie anymore.
14
00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:46,951
Pedro?
15
00:00:48,160 --> 00:00:50,628
I can't seem to find my pencil.
16
00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:52,995
Do you have any idea where it might be?
17
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,234
It's right there between
your bosoms... ma'am.
18
00:00:56,320 --> 00:00:57,309
Ma'am?
19
00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,233
You just ma'amed your way
out of me buying you beer again.
20
00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:03,357
Ma'am?
21
00:01:06,320 --> 00:01:08,914
And, of course, the one thing
you can always count on
22
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,399
to knock you on your arse...
23
00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:12,875
Floor wax.
24
00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:15,152
Uncanny.
25
00:01:15,240 --> 00:01:16,832
Dr Kelso, while I got you here,
26
00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:19,673
I need to discuss
a matter of grave importance.
27
00:01:19,760 --> 00:01:22,399
- What is it?
- I'm not happy with my uniform.
28
00:01:23,160 --> 00:01:25,833
New janitor uniforms! Top priority.
29
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:29,754
Right up there with silk jammies for
the patients and a cat door for the ICU.
30
00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:31,876
I made some sketches.
31
00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:35,715
- This one has a cape!
- Gives me the option of fighting crime.
32
00:01:36,360 --> 00:01:37,873
After work, of course.
33
00:01:37,960 --> 00:01:41,032
Now, this one has sort of
a medieval thing goin'.
34
00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:44,028
- That's you on a horse?
- It's a steed, sir.
35
00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:47,111
That's for clean-ups in outer space.
36
00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:51,435
This one's...
outer space evening wear.
37
00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:53,511
This one's just a kangaroo.
38
00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:55,477
Sometimes I draw kangaroos.
39
00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:58,472
You know, I could look at
the demented crayon scratchings
40
00:01:58,560 --> 00:02:01,836
of a madman all day,
but I got a hospital to run.
41
00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:05,391
- Did you wax over there yet?
- No, sir.
42
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:13,270
I'll get a new uniform,
or I'll wax everything in your world.
43
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:16,318
Wait'll you get a load of this.
44
00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:18,709
They're giving me
a teaching award tonight
45
00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:21,155
so I'm gonna need you
to holster up the twins,
46
00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:23,356
as you'll be playin'
the role of arm candy.
47
00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:26,477
Yeah, I'm not going.
If I wanna hear someone go on and on
48
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:29,518
about how great you are,
I'll just listen to you during sex.
49
00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:33,070
I'm hearing the hate,
but I'm not seeing the hate. You...
50
00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:36,948
Oh, my God.
51
00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:39,918
Did you Botox your face
into an expressionless mask?
52
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,877
Pedro called me "ma'am."
53
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:45,475
Damn it, Jordan, come on.
Now, you know I'm generally OK
54
00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:48,154
with you putting any poison
you want into your body,
55
00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:50,708
but this is the first time
I've ever won anything.
56
00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:54,998
- It's not that bad.
- Really! Show me... happy.
57
00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:57,349
Sad.
58
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:02,429
Silly. Amused. Bemused. C-mused.
59
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:04,635
Show me... angry.
60
00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:09,951
You got angry down.
61
00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:17,074
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62
00:03:23,560 --> 00:03:25,915
When we got to work,
not a whole lot had changed.
63
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,433
The silence was killing me.
64
00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:28,873
You kissed my wife.
65
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:30,632
I miss the silence.
66
00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:32,153
Did you like it?
67
00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:35,755
Well, it's kind of a trick question.
If I say yes, it's like I'm sayin',
68
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:38,798
"Dude, your wife is hot,
and I'd like to get me some of that."
69
00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:40,552
But if I say no, then I'm all like,
70
00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:44,030
"I know she's your wife, but
you can keep that fish-lipped bitty."
71
00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:47,276
What about you, Carla?
Did you like it?
72
00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:49,271
No! His lips are chappy.
73
00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:51,316
I can't use lip balm.
I end up eating it.
74
00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:53,868
When I was little,
I used to spread it on crackers.
75
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:58,436
Well, if it isn't the happy couple.
Oh, and Turk's here, too!
76
00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,908
OK. Are we not laughing about this yet?
77
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,594
Turk, look, I'm so sorry,
but you have to believe me.
78
00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:07,194
- It was barely anything.
- It was barely even a kiss.
79
00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:09,794
It was an accidental lip bump,
like, "Oops."
80
00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:14,070
Don't even look at her.
Sit on the floor!
81
00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:17,914
- Sitting.
- Fine. I'll show you with Elliot.
82
00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:24,028
Something wonderful is happening.
83
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:26,999
I don't understand why you're
butting in on my patient
84
00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:29,548
outside of your usual
arrogance and God complex.
85
00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:32,200
Don't know what
you're talkin' about. Kiss my ring.
86
00:04:32,280 --> 00:04:35,238
However, if you'd like to know
about why I'm "butting in,"
87
00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:37,754
it's because your
young patient Lindsay here,
88
00:04:37,840 --> 00:04:40,877
when she was 10, I'm the one
who diagnosed her with epilepsy.
89
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:44,157
Now that her medication's
no longer controlling her seizures,
90
00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:45,912
I'd like to know what's going on.
91
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:48,992
Besides, over the years,
we've developed quite a rapport.
92
00:04:51,840 --> 00:04:54,877
Hey. Lindsay.
What's up, girlfriend?
93
00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:59,552
See? Rapport.
94
00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:05,273
The damn janitor waxed the counter!
95
00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:06,953
Give me that phone.
96
00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:12,156
- It doesn't have to be like this.
- I know.
97
00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:14,873
Here.
98
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:24,118
It's beautiful.
99
00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:27,351
You don't have to
put it on today, but...
100
00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,120
Hey, we're kinda in
the middle of something here!
101
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:32,191
This'll just take a second.
102
00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:39,636
Nice, huh?
103
00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:43,350
Who gets a tattoo of a mop?
104
00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:45,908
- Can I get up? My butt is asleep.
- No!
105
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,991
Turk, you know how I was so upset
106
00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,640
because you started
calling your ex-girlfriend?
107
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:54,759
I just couldn't understand how a
married person could slip up like that.
108
00:05:54,840 --> 00:05:56,478
Now I do.
109
00:05:56,560 --> 00:06:00,109
- I'm so sorry.
- Me, too, buddy.
110
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:04,512
Guys... as insane as this may sound,
I'm actually gonna be OK with this.
111
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:08,994
Just do me a favour. No more apologies.
And no more explanations.
112
00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:10,593
And for the love of God, honey,
113
00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:13,399
no more girl-on-girl
kissing demonstrations.
114
00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:17,190
Something horrible has happened.
115
00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:20,189
I'll tell you why
Lindsay's seizures are back.
116
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:23,477
Blood work shows her Dilantin's zero.
Not takin' her medicine.
117
00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:25,949
What? I'm gonna
give that girl a talking to.
118
00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:28,952
With all due respect,
Dr Cox, maybe I should talk to her.
119
00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,998
With no due respect whatsoever, why?
120
00:06:32,080 --> 00:06:34,548
She's a teenage girl.
That's an awkward time.
121
00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:37,950
You know, your breasts are growing...
Not always symmetrically.
122
00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:40,031
You like boys.
One gives you a ride home.
123
00:06:40,120 --> 00:06:43,715
You think something'll happen,
it doesn't, and that makes it official.
124
00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:45,119
You're a lopsided freak!
125
00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:47,714
Happy ending, though.
Lefty caught up in college.
126
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:48,789
- Barbie!
- Yeah?
127
00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:52,395
I have a finite amount of brain space,
and your inspiring story
128
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:55,916
of the little breast who couldn't
just pushed out my memory
129
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,231
of the 1980 Olympic hockey team's
victory at Lake Placid.
130
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:03,279
Miracle on ice... gone.
Listen to me carefully.
131
00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:07,035
I know all about what it's like
to be a teenage girl.
132
00:07:08,400 --> 00:07:10,914
Of course, I never had to try
to convince my mother
133
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:12,991
that I sure would've liked a naval ring.
134
00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:15,992
Well, we were all going to Jamaica,
and my friend Susie...
135
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,431
Brain space.
136
00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:28,195
Turk. You've been so awesome,
137
00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:30,999
but we still need you to know
how innocent the kiss was.
138
00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:34,709
- Guys, it's cool. Don't worry about it.
- Just watch, buddy.
139
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:36,789
See?
140
00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:49,229
Get your hands off my woman!
141
00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:58,390
I think you separated my shoulder.
The pain is excruciating.
142
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:01,317
What?
143
00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:07,558
- Looking good, Janitor.
- Well, thank you, petite lady.
144
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:10,359
Wow! That colour
really brings out your package.
145
00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:13,159
Thank you, supposedly straight surgeon.
146
00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:15,071
It's a good day.
147
00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:18,197
Hey, buddy!
That's a great suit!
148
00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,952
Don't bunch the new uni.
149
00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:24,119
Little boy blue!
Blow your horn.
150
00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:26,637
He didn't stop.
151
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:30,072
Stop. Hallway's closed.
Find another way around.
152
00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:32,799
- Whatever. You got somethin' here.
- What?
153
00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:34,478
- What's that?
- I don't know.
154
00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:38,155
You look so cute in your little blue
outfit, I wanted to give you a tickle.
155
00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:42,474
All right, what the hell is goin' on?
156
00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:46,470
Feel free to take notes.
All right, Blossom.
157
00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:49,028
Here's the gossip.
You're having seizures again
158
00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:53,079
cos you're not taking your medication.
If this continues, you'll be dead.
159
00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:56,596
I'm not talking about the "Oh, God,
if I don't get invited to the prom,
160
00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:59,752
I'm going to die" type of dead.
I'm talking dead dead. Clear?
161
00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:03,071
Cos if it's not, I could, of course,
text you on my BlackBerry or
162
00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:04,832
my blueberry or my Chuck Berry.
163
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,150
Technically,
Chuck Berry is a black Berry.
164
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:10,073
The point is, stop wasting
everybody's time and grow up.
165
00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:13,789
- That clear to you, sweetheart?
- Yes, Dr Cox.
166
00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:17,429
Thattagirl.
Barbie? Feel free to kiss my ring.
167
00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:19,990
It's nice when things
get back to normal.
168
00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:21,354
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Carla.
169
00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:23,954
You gotta try these
sweet potato fries. Amazing.
170
00:09:24,040 --> 00:09:25,632
- Put ketchup on it.
- You got it.
171
00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:48,232
Like I said before,
small things can knock you on your arse.
172
00:09:49,720 --> 00:09:52,951
Whether it's realising that
nobody's afraid of you anymore.
173
00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:56,031
Good Lord!
174
00:09:57,240 --> 00:10:00,835
Or finding out that you have no idea
how to deal with a teenage girl.
175
00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:03,592
Nice work.
176
00:10:05,560 --> 00:10:08,552
The important thing's
to not make a scene in the cafeteria.
177
00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:09,993
Want another one?
178
00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,913
- Turk!
- What? What? Were you gonna eat that?
179
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,149
How about this?
180
00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:17,949
Let's all have fries, huh?
Let's all have fries!
181
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,350
- You want fries?
- You said you were OK!
182
00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:21,429
My fries!
183
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:24,876
Well, apparently I'm not OK,
am I, Carla? Apparently, I'm not!
184
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:28,157
You know why? Because kisses
just don't happen. They don't.
185
00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:31,073
Now, this is somebody's fault,
and I wanna know whose.
186
00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:36,518
Don't eat that fry!
187
00:10:40,560 --> 00:10:42,630
Admittedly, I lost my cool here.
188
00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:45,188
- No, it's understandable.
- No! Why would you?
189
00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:48,955
I'm sorry, the only way I'm gonna have
closure is if I can blame one of you.
190
00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:51,873
I just gotta figure out who.
191
00:10:54,600 --> 00:10:57,034
Don't worry, this'll all be fine.
You know Turk.
192
00:10:57,120 --> 00:11:00,476
Whomever he blames will get
the silent treatment for a couple days,
193
00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:02,994
then he'll make snarky comments
for a few months.
194
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:05,275
Sooner or later,
he'll be laughing about it.
195
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:07,874
Like when I slept with
his family's cleaning lady.
196
00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:11,198
- You slept with Toonie?
- I was staying in their guest room,
197
00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:14,317
she was buffing the nightstand,
and she just kept on buffin'.
198
00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,790
- Thanks for takin' the hit on this.
- Me?! You're his best friend.
199
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:20,997
All you have to do is say, "I'm sorry,"
high-five him, and go...
200
00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:24,311
All you do is have sex and he'll
forgive you. If I have sex with him,
201
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:27,392
- he'll end up madder.
- Let's not play into his blame game.
202
00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:29,152
Agreed.
203
00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:34,038
Dude, she was pourin' drinks into me,
and she knows I put out when I'm drunk.
204
00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:37,910
He took me to a bar.
205
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,668
I didn't ask him to walk me home!
206
00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:47,751
I'm tellin' you, dude,
she was all over me like ants on candy.
207
00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:51,435
You think you're
talkin' to Turk, don't you? Idiot.
208
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:56,914
Look, Lindsay, I'm real sorry
if I upset you before. I truly am.
209
00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:00,595
I probably should've asked you
why you stopped taking your medication,
210
00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:02,159
and to be honest with you...
211
00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:05,949
I was hoping you'd be able to give me
the answer to that one right about now.
212
00:12:07,920 --> 00:12:10,992
So... Lindso...
213
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:15,710
It must be kinda cool having
the same name as that Lindsay Lohan.
214
00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:17,631
Gosh, she's super-cool.
215
00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,075
Just between you, me and the IV,
216
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:23,516
I guess I've probably seen
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen,
217
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:26,956
oh, I don't know, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight, nine times.
218
00:12:27,040 --> 00:12:29,349
What a film.
219
00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:35,074
That girl... That girl is a robot.
220
00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:37,549
I spent three hours in there
and got goose egg.
221
00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:39,710
It's so odd that
she didn't respond to you
222
00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:42,712
because you know
so much about teenage girls.
223
00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:44,233
All right, look. Barbie...
224
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:47,198
I'm about to say four words
I've never said to you before,
225
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:48,633
that I'll never say again.
226
00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:51,439
Go on, get outta here.
227
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:55,675
I need your help.
228
00:12:55,760 --> 00:13:00,072
Fine. But I have three rules. One,
when we're in the room, you say nothing.
229
00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:02,435
Two, I get to say
whatever I want about you.
230
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:05,751
Three, if you break rule one or two,
I get to "boing" your curls.
231
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:07,917
What the hell does "boing" mean?
232
00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:11,832
Boing!
233
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,791
Oh, God, this is gonna kill me.
234
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:22,799
All right, just put on your mean face,
and order shall be restored.
235
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:31,112
Yeah, hi. Nut.
236
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:35,478
What? I don't even know you.
237
00:13:43,360 --> 00:13:45,351
Yeah, yeah. Happy birthday.
238
00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:50,359
You gave me a cursed uniform.
239
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:53,234
It's not cursed.
It's simply psychology.
240
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,949
I chose robin's-egg blue cos it has a
calming effect on people and I knew
241
00:13:57,040 --> 00:14:00,749
it'd be the thorn in your paw.
Other colours evoke different reactions.
242
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:04,879
For example, bright orange
has been found to provoke hostility.
243
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:08,589
Dr Kelso, I want to
thank you again for the tie.
244
00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:10,671
Fist five!
245
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,670
That's the third time today!
246
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:22,760
Please don't make me
go to this banquet tonight.
247
00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:25,308
Jordan, this award came from my interns.
248
00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:27,630
The least you can do
is show up and support me.
249
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:33,872
And just like that,
it was time for the moment of truth.
250
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:36,030
- Hey, Turk.
- Hey, Turk.
251
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:37,235
What's up, J. D?
252
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:39,953
The silent treatment.
253
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:41,109
[J.D.] Be gracious.
254
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:45,239
I got three words for ya.
Sucks to be... Adding a fourth... you.
255
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:53,549
After sharing a quick victory dance
with Roland, the heavy-set orderly,
256
00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:56,313
who, coincidentally,
was my victory dance coach...
257
00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:57,389
- Pop the hips.
- OK.
258
00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,118
- Pop the hips, J.D.
- There it is.
259
00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:01,794
- Thanks, Roland. One day I'll get it.
- I doubt it.
260
00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:04,348
... I got to thinking
about relationships.
261
00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:07,559
About how people fall in love...
262
00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:11,716
... have kids...
263
00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:14,635
... grow old together...
264
00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,390
... and say goodbye.
265
00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:21,438
And then, for some reason,
I thought about the circus.
266
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,748
But then I was back on relationships.
267
00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:29,035
Back to your room, Mr Johnson.
You got one ventricle.
268
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:32,999
I couldn't help thinking maybe it wasn't
luck that made relationships last.
269
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:35,389
Maybe it was a matter
of who takes fewer hits.
270
00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:39,871
You don't have to talk to me. Just wave
if you're gonna give me a ride home.
271
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:45,075
And I realised I should've been
the one to take that hit, not Carla.
272
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:49,709
Hey, Lindsay.
273
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:54,631
- Don't worry. He's not allowed to talk.
- Is that true?
274
00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:57,957
You may nod.
275
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:04,476
You know, Lindsay,
when I was 15, I cut my own bangs.
276
00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,712
That's right, Percival,
it's a high school hair story.
277
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:13,555
Anyway, Judy Keenan told me
that she would also cut her hair off.
278
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:16,108
It was like a suicide pact,
only with bangs.
279
00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,839
I cut off my hair,
and of course, she backed out.
280
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:21,150
But even though my bangs
looked horrible,
281
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,993
I kept them that way,
mostly because those stupid bangs
282
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:27,038
were the only thing in my life
that I felt I had control over.
283
00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:28,712
You know?
284
00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:31,598
I'm so tired of everyone
telling me what to do.
285
00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:34,513
When to be home, what to wear,
when to take my medicine.
286
00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:36,591
I mean, I'm the one who's sick. Right?
287
00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:38,989
I can handle my own life.
288
00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:42,038
How about I tell your parents
the prescription's will be given
289
00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:45,635
directly to you. You're in charge
of getting your Dilantin, taking it.
290
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:46,709
Everything.
291
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:49,314
- Thank you.
- Great.
292
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,354
I don't have a ring,
but you can kiss my arse.
293
00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:57,917
Feared in grey... beautiful in blue.
294
00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,912
Feared in grey... beautiful in blue.
295
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:04,231
I'm gonna grab a fry... some ketchup.
296
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:06,876
It's cold.
297
00:17:08,320 --> 00:17:10,197
That's it.
298
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:19,632
I'm back.
299
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,310
That was weird.
300
00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:33,915
No, that was weird.
301
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,311
- What're you doin'?
- That's all it was.
302
00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:40,996
And if you still need someone to blame,
why don't you try blaming yourself?
303
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:45,192
You're absolutely right.
It's my fault you kissed my wife.
304
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:49,473
- I'm goin' home.
- Who do you think you're talkin' to?
305
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:52,552
You think you're the greatest husband?
I was there when you
306
00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:55,757
flirted with your ex and
neglected to tell her you're married.
307
00:17:55,840 --> 00:17:59,389
When you tried to hook up with that
waitress the day before you got engaged.
308
00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:02,870
When you hooked up with that stripper
at Boobies, Boobies, Boobies.
309
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:03,949
That was you.
310
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:07,874
I know, but I told her my name was Turk.
Point is, think of the millions of times
311
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:11,669
you've chosen not to hang with your wife
cos you were tryin' to hang with me.
312
00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:14,194
It's time you started
acting like a real husband
313
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:17,192
instead of actin' like
some sort of crazy cowboy.
314
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:19,919
- A cowboy?
- I don't know. It just came to me.
315
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,797
You know I'm right, Turk.
316
00:18:25,400 --> 00:18:28,631
When your pride's at stake,
you can't help but have questions.
317
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:31,553
Just tell me. How did you know
what was bothering her?
318
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:34,996
Tell me now so that we don't
have to talk anymore. Ever.
319
00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:37,994
How is it that no man
understands that every woman,
320
00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:41,436
whether she's 16 or 60,
still has that awkward, insecure,
321
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:44,353
self-conscious teenage girl
inside of her?
322
00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:47,079
A lot of times,
the answer is about sacrifice.
323
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:54,513
Hey. Look, I was thinkin' maybe...
324
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,955
Maybe you'd rather
just stay in tonight...
325
00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:59,349
You know, have some pizza,
watch some movies.
326
00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:00,429
What do you say?
327
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:04,279
Are you tryin' to smile?
328
00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:07,911
You're so damn cute.
329
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,959
Sometimes sacrifice is only wearing
your new uni when you're not at work.
330
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:14,713
OK, how about this one?
Three blue jays fly into a bar.
331
00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:16,995
They say,
"We just want to wet our beaks."
332
00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:21,036
No? Sorry, Dan. You tell one.
333
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:24,791
Other times, it's about
swallowing that damn pride.
334
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:28,755
J.D., would you
hand me the wine, please?
335
00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:30,831
Turk's not talkin' to me.
336
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,511
But ultimately, big or small,
337
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:43,831
sacrifice is about doin' something
you really don't want to do.
338
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:49,032
Hey, guys, I know we talked about
this before, but... I'm movin' out.
339
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:50,513
Really?
340
00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:54,832
- Yeah. You guys need your space.
- Wow. Thanks, man.
341
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:57,196
You're gonna miss me, though.
342
00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:59,430
Hey, you could turn his room into a gym.
343
00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:02,429
We ain't puttin' no gym
in my media room.
344
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:05,797
- Whose media room?
- Our media room.
345
00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:08,075
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
346
00:20:09,305 --> 00:21:09,210
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