1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:05,878 One of the reasons Turk and I are so popular around here 2 00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:07,996 is we love helping our fellow doctors. 3 00:00:08,080 --> 00:00:11,390 - Hey, Hooch. - That's my name. Don't wear it out. 4 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:14,358 Classic Hooch. Even though I'm not gonna be paid, 5 00:00:14,440 --> 00:00:17,876 I'll cover your shift so you can do Mr Schindler's endoscopy. 6 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:20,235 I'll cross-cover Dr Turner's patients 7 00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:22,550 so Turner can assist you on the procedure. 8 00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:24,835 Why are you going through so much trouble? 9 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:27,309 Who's doing the endoscopy on Mr Schindler? 10 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:29,436 - Turner and Hooch! - Turner and Hooch! 11 00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:32,631 All right! 12 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:34,517 Were you just Hooch? 13 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,238 Everyone hates you guys. 14 00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:39,073 - Hooch. - Hooch is crazy! 15 00:00:39,160 --> 00:00:42,357 As much as Hooch loved us, it was even better to see Turk happy. 16 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:46,399 He and Carla started couples therapy, and I'm not sure he was enjoying it. 17 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:49,950 Carla says you cry after you orgasm. 18 00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:53,032 - Would you like to talk about that? - No, not really. 19 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,708 I decided to help their marriage by moving out, 20 00:00:56,800 --> 00:01:00,429 partly because Carla and I accidentally kissed and messed things up, 21 00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:04,069 but mostly because it was time. Finding an apartment has not been easy. 22 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:05,798 I'm so sorry about your father. 23 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:08,030 I'm sure he lived a wonderful life 24 00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:11,112 at 14 Maple Drive, apartment 4B. 25 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:14,272 Was he lucky enough to enjoy a washer and dryer in his unit 26 00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:16,555 while he was alive? 27 00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:19,357 Ever mention any hot neighbours? 28 00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:23,476 What are you doing in the on-call room? 29 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:24,549 Nothing. 30 00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:26,358 - I gotta go. - OK. 31 00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:29,474 Thankfully, Turk got over the kissing. 32 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:32,393 There's a weird new thing he does when he says goodbye. 33 00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:33,959 OK, I'll see you around. 34 00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:36,759 Peace, homey. 35 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:40,952 Do you guys think that Clarissa is more attractive than me? 36 00:01:41,040 --> 00:01:42,029 Yes. 37 00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:44,638 Who's Clarissa? 38 00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:47,029 The short, balding woman in the pharmacy. 39 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:48,712 Oh, then, definitely yes. 40 00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:51,633 She just got engaged, bad combover and all. 41 00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:54,632 She beats you to the altar, time to hang up the ovaries. 42 00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:57,996 Too mean. How am I supposed to meet a guy working in this place? 43 00:01:58,080 --> 00:01:59,638 Are the guys here that bad? 44 00:02:01,520 --> 00:02:03,875 Twelve minutes door to door! 45 00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:06,110 That's a personal best, suckos! 46 00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,431 Nurse, suction. 47 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,875 The patient's not even here yet. 48 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:13,989 I know. 49 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:18,755 I just wish once a cute, thoughtful guy would walk through the door. 50 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:23,511 Can I get help? My neighbour fainted. 51 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:26,558 She doesn't like ambulances, so I brought her in myself. 52 00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:28,870 Let me take this one. You've got a phone call. 53 00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:31,633 - I'll call them back. - Your mom died. 54 00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:33,119 What? 55 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:36,678 Her mom's fine. It's just a little running joke we have. 56 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:39,228 She'll be laughing later. Gotcha, Jenny! 57 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:42,551 Dead mom joke's always funny. 58 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:50,074 Watch Movies, TV Series and Live Sports Signup Here -> WWW.ADMITME.APP 59 00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:59,031 So, Betty, you're back with us. 60 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:00,758 And you brought a handsome buck. 61 00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:03,673 Are you trying to make me jealous? You know you're my gal. 62 00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:04,988 Who are you? 63 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:07,640 I'm Dr Dorian. I'm the one that's taken care of you 64 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,597 the last 19 times you've been in here. 65 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:12,194 She's getting a little forgetful. 66 00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:14,430 - Are you a relative? - No. Neighbour. 67 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:15,748 Well, I met her once. 68 00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:19,628 It was raining, and you were wearing a blue sweater. 69 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:22,951 That's a lovely memory. You know what else is a lovely memory? 70 00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:27,238 That Sunday I spent eight hours helping you join the Wilford Brimley fan club. 71 00:03:27,320 --> 00:03:28,799 You don't remember that? 72 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:30,996 I'm kind of on my way to the airport. 73 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:33,640 I'm going kayaking with friends in New Zealand. 74 00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:36,109 Cool. So, what are you gonna do there? 75 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:37,428 Mostly kayaking. 76 00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:42,113 So, Betty, I'll check on you the second I get back, OK? 77 00:03:42,200 --> 00:03:43,792 You get better now. 78 00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:47,031 So, Elliot, the first thing we're gonna need to do is... 79 00:03:47,120 --> 00:03:49,350 Is Dr Reid coming back? 80 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:52,273 Don't worry. You're in good hands with Dr Dorian. 81 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,875 - Who's that? - That's me, Betty. Dr Dorian. 82 00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:59,191 Cocoon. Wilford Brimley. Steve Guttenberg, the whole day. No? 83 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:05,350 Jake. So you're probably rushing home to wipe the old person smell off? 84 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:06,509 Excuse me? 85 00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:08,795 I'm just kidding. I love old people. 86 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:11,474 There's no denying they have a distinctive smell. 87 00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:15,314 I mean, it's nothing bad. It's like a... general mustiness. 88 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:19,794 Like, you know, when you get your cast taken off, 89 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:22,030 and... skin mould. 90 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:25,918 Well, I got a flight to catch. 91 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:28,992 - You guys need me to sign anything? - No. You're good. 92 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:30,877 OK, then. 93 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,592 Hats off there, Barbie. 94 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:39,719 The was one potent combination of verbal diarrhoea and stunned silence. 95 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:42,030 You should have asked him out. Men love that. 96 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:44,111 No, Carla, men don't love that. 97 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:46,760 We don't love picnics, foreplay, candles, 98 00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:49,673 baths, photo albums, or when you drive so we can relax. 99 00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:52,399 And, as always, we're not that big on Hugh Jackman. 100 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:57,031 The only thing men care about as far as dating is concerned is the chase. 101 00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,156 If you want that guy to look your way, 102 00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:02,437 listen to me carefully, ignore the living hell out of him. 103 00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:05,110 That's the worst advice I've ever heard. 104 00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:06,189 Good point. 105 00:05:06,280 --> 00:05:09,909 You don't happen to have any other gems before you run to couples therapy 106 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:13,436 to sift through the wreckage that is the first year of your marriage? 107 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:17,593 Look, Dr Cox, I'm sure that you are fantastic at picking up men. Really. 108 00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:21,149 But I can handle this one on my own, thank you. 109 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:26,472 Some people just cannot take a good "your mom is dead" joke. 110 00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:32,159 Anyway, I worry that sometimes when I'm tense, 111 00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:34,390 I can be a little condescending. 112 00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:36,198 Actually, I've noticed that. 113 00:05:36,280 --> 00:05:38,669 Have you really noticed it, "Mr Therapist"? 114 00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:43,550 - Chris, what's going on with you? - Nothing worth talking about. 115 00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:47,269 This is your third visit and you've yet to say how you're feeling. 116 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:50,557 I don't think there's anything wrong with our relationship. 117 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:53,552 You pretend everything's OK, even though deep inside, 118 00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:55,232 a lot of things bother you. 119 00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:58,756 So come on, tell me what you're thinking right now. 120 00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:00,910 I'm staring at that picture. 121 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,878 Is that one of those psychological ink blot tests 122 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:07,270 where I try and figure out what it is? Because, if so... 123 00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:09,316 ...l'm seeing a duck. 124 00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:12,990 - Let's take a break. - OK. 125 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:17,358 But, Hooch, if the patient just has simple cellulitis, 126 00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:19,351 why aren't the antibiotics working? 127 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:22,750 Damn it, Turner, it just doesn't make sense! 128 00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:24,273 Even though I had created 129 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:26,999 a super medical crime-fighting team, I felt lousy. 130 00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:29,355 I told Betty her lungs had given out, 131 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:31,749 and she wasn't gonna leave the hospital. 132 00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:33,239 So... 133 00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:36,670 ...what are my choices? 134 00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:39,274 Well, we could put you on a breathing machine, 135 00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:41,794 but it's unlikely you'd ever come off of it. 136 00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:45,031 Or I could just make sure you're as comfortable as possible. 137 00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:46,997 "As comfortable as possible." 138 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,913 I've said that a million times, but no idea what it means. 139 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,353 There you go, Betty. 140 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:54,238 That's every cotton ball in the hospital. 141 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:58,916 I am very, very comfortable! 142 00:07:00,840 --> 00:07:02,353 Then you're ready to die. 143 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:06,557 Look, is there anyone you'd like to talk this over with? 144 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:12,513 She just wants to talk to you for a minute. 145 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:13,635 Yeah? About what? 146 00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:16,188 Just about how and when she should die. 147 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:19,556 I counsel most of my random neighbours on their deathbeds. 148 00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,596 This woman is alone, she's depressed, 149 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:24,672 and for some reason feels like she's connected with you. 150 00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:27,991 - Sorry. I wouldn't know what to say. - Open with a joke. 151 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:31,516 Then you and your raft will be on a four-hour trip to New Zealand. 152 00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,397 No, it's more like 14 hours. 153 00:07:33,480 --> 00:07:36,870 You're close to revealing geography is your Achilles heel. 154 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:39,190 Say something smart to regain credibility. 155 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:42,670 Vesa-vegal syncopy is mediated by the autonomic nervous system. 156 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:45,513 And Betty needs you, pal. Come on. Do it. 157 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:47,158 You'll feel good. Trust me. 158 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,435 You don't even know where New Zealand is. 159 00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:52,760 You can dance your way there from Old Zealand. 160 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:54,751 Are you an idiot? 161 00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:58,999 Elliot, my neighbour fainted too. 162 00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:00,354 You want to go clubbing? 163 00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:03,750 I don't mean dancing, I mean going up to the roof and killing rats. 164 00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:07,196 - I thought we were done with this. - Thought I'd give it a shot. 165 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:10,351 Just put her back in her room. 166 00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:12,795 She's not a patient. I got her at the mall. 167 00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:15,437 Better get you back to the food court. 168 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:17,556 Your husband's probably come to by now. 169 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:20,439 Oh, my God, here he comes. 170 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:22,829 OK, this is easy. Just compliment him. 171 00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:24,638 Tell him he has a square head. 172 00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,439 That's not a compliment. What shape is a compliment? 173 00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:29,636 Triangle? Pyramid? Circle. Circle head. 174 00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:32,871 You're stuck on shapes, and square head's almost here! 175 00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:34,996 Just do what Dr Cox said and ignore him. 176 00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:36,195 Hey, Elliot. 177 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,955 That girl's kind cute. What's her story? 178 00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:44,429 - She's a dude. - Yeah? 179 00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:47,353 Gotta look at the Adam's apple, buddy. 180 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:50,159 - Therapy is killing me. - I don't know how you do it. 181 00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:53,312 Make love with your lady in front of some old dude filming you? 182 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:56,437 - That's not couples therapy, Todd. - Then what did I do? 183 00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:58,988 - You did amateur porn. - Sweet. 184 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:02,229 J.D., you got a sec? 185 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:04,470 - Sure. I'll be with you in a minute. - OK. 186 00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:05,549 So check this out. 187 00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:08,871 Our therapist says I'm the type who pretends everything's OK, 188 00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,349 even when I'm upset deep down inside. 189 00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:13,431 If you look at the whole kissing thing, 190 00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,990 intellectually you moved on, but emotionally you're still upset. 191 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:19,310 - You'll get there. - I'm not upset. 192 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,472 Really? Oh, OK. I'll see you later. Bye. 193 00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:24,835 - You see? - See what? 194 00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:27,639 Let's try it again. I'll see you later, buddy. Bye. 195 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:29,790 - Bye. - Always the same spot! 196 00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:32,030 It's like your fingers are stone. 197 00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:34,190 Last time. I'll see you later, b... 198 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:35,508 Hey! Look at yourself. 199 00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:39,234 I've been hitting you? 200 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:41,038 Yeah. You're like The Brown Hulk. 201 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:44,954 Hey, how's it going in here, you two? 202 00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:48,112 Well, pretty good. Pretty good. We talked about her past. 203 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:51,510 Betty even let me in on a few romantic trysts from her younger days. 204 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:53,670 Are you familiar with Mr David Brinkley? 205 00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:54,749 - No way. - Yeah. 206 00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:56,432 Betty. 207 00:09:56,520 --> 00:09:59,353 Then when we finally got down to talking for real, 208 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:03,752 well, it became pretty obvious that Betty had already made a decision. 209 00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:06,039 OK. 210 00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:07,917 What impressed me most about Jake, 211 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:10,230 besides his perfectly square head, 212 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:13,118 was that he faced this whole Betty thing straight on. 213 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,873 He thinks I'm cute. He thinks I'm cute. 214 00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:19,236 He didn't hide because he was afraid to admit someone was right. 215 00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:21,231 - I'm cute... - Barbie. 216 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,959 - Why so happy? - No reason. 217 00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:29,517 He didn't run because he was scared of facing his own feelings. 218 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:32,319 Baby, I'm not gonna be able to make therapy tonight. 219 00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:34,914 - I got surgery. - Fine. 220 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:38,276 He wouldn't be able to do it if it weren't for his secret weapon... 221 00:10:38,360 --> 00:10:39,429 Dr John Dorian. 222 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:40,714 - What? - What? 223 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:43,268 You said your name in a weird summing up way. 224 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:46,716 - No, I didn't, Jake. - Oh, so you're Jake. 225 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:51,032 As I understand it, you just talked my sister into ending her life. 226 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:52,599 Long story short. 227 00:10:52,680 --> 00:10:54,238 I'm a lawyer. I'm suing you. 228 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,598 Once again. Sister dying, brother lawyer, suing you! 229 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:03,959 See, that's summing up in a weird way. Yeah. 230 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,031 "Brother lawyer..." That's it. 231 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:12,111 I can't believe this is happening. 232 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:14,270 Everything's gonna be fine. Trust me. 233 00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:15,952 - Is that him? - Yes. Here's Ted, 234 00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:18,873 our brilliant hospital attorney. Sharp as a tack. 235 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:22,509 Mark my words, Jake, we're gonna take every last cent you have! 236 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:24,192 No, no, Ted. We're on his side. 237 00:11:24,280 --> 00:11:26,635 Oh. Here's my card. 238 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:28,838 This is a Post-lt. 239 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:31,559 I don't get real cards until I win a case. 240 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:33,709 Go take a nap, Ted. 241 00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:36,278 He spelled "attorney" wrong. 242 00:11:36,360 --> 00:11:39,750 "Buy groceries, kill self." 243 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:42,070 You're sent from the future to destroy me. 244 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,116 I am not from the future, Jake. 245 00:11:44,200 --> 00:11:45,269 Gesundheit, Carol. 246 00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:47,749 Yes! It finally worked! What are the odds? 247 00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:51,469 I don't know, J.D. What I do know is I'm about to go down to my truck, 248 00:11:51,560 --> 00:11:54,120 get my kayak paddle, and go Greg Barton on your ass. 249 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,077 - Who's Barton? - Famous kayaker. 250 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,752 Oh, Greg Barton. 251 00:11:57,840 --> 00:11:59,637 I hate you, J.D. 252 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:01,119 I know. 253 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:06,470 This is the most painful thing I've done, 254 00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,835 and I was a cutter for a week in high school. 255 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:12,629 My shop teacher thought scars were sexy, but that's a whole other story. 256 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:16,269 Your advice really worked and I'd appreciate some more help. 257 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:17,713 No problem, Barbie. 258 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:20,268 Let me just finish writing this prescription, 259 00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:21,918 and you'll be squared away. 260 00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:24,871 This is a prescription for "no." 261 00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:28,475 To be taken with food every Saturday night while you're eating alone. 262 00:12:28,560 --> 00:12:30,869 You don't understand the severity of this. 263 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,679 I am dangerously close to giving up men altogether. 264 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:37,469 On behalf of men everywhere, including the ones in the mud huts, 265 00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:40,120 let me be the first to say thanks and hallelujah. 266 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:43,272 See the problem with trying to appeal to its human side? 267 00:12:43,360 --> 00:12:47,114 - He doesn't have one. - Exactly. But what does he have? 268 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:50,158 A shaved chest, tiny t-shirts, and the eyes of a madman. 269 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:54,791 I'm sorry. The correct answer she was looking for is a giant ego. 270 00:12:54,880 --> 00:12:57,075 I have a giant ego. 271 00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:58,229 Damn it! I knew that. 272 00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:01,198 Would you just appeal to it so I can get something to eat? 273 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:04,670 - You're amazing. - And I'm in. 274 00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:13,071 Dr Kelso, you can't do that. 275 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:16,357 I didn't. Your friend Turkleton did. 276 00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:18,829 But I can do whatever I want. 277 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:22,239 You look ridiculous. 278 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:27,149 I thought we were doing moustaches on Sunday. 279 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:28,878 I didn't do this. Kelso did! 280 00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:32,509 - You invited Kelso to Moustache Sunday? - Enough with the moustaches. 281 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:34,397 Did you break up Turner and Hooch? 282 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:37,278 I needed an excuse to get out of couples counselling. 283 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:39,396 I can't open up, man. I just can't do it. 284 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:41,277 Besides, this way no one gets hurt. 285 00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:49,789 We had a hell of a run, man. 286 00:13:49,880 --> 00:13:51,233 Just get out of here. 287 00:13:57,560 --> 00:13:59,391 Maybe I should just go talk to him. 288 00:13:59,480 --> 00:14:01,550 Forget Dennis. He's a horrible person. 289 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:04,359 We'll never change his mind. We need to focus on Betty. 290 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:08,115 We'll just have her explain how she feels. Problem solved. 291 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:10,714 "Betty's in a coma." I'm gonna talk to Dennis. 292 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:12,518 He seems like a reasonable guy. 293 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:17,114 Hey, Jake. How's it goin'? 294 00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,475 I've had better days. How are you? 295 00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:23,713 Listen to me, Barbacious, you gotta stay the course. 296 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:24,994 Keep ignoring him. 297 00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:27,958 But I'm already ignoring him. How do I ignore him more? 298 00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:31,350 Piece of cake. First you engage him, then you ignore him. 299 00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:34,513 Elliot? I said how are you? 300 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,398 I don't have time for this, OK? I'm a doctor. 301 00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:38,799 But you asked me how I was. 302 00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:41,440 Trying to save lives. It's not always about you. 303 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,634 You would not believe the day I'm having. 304 00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:48,712 Quiet, jackass. What did you say to Elliot to make her run? 305 00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:51,030 - If you hurt her... - I didn't say anything. 306 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,031 - Everyone here is crazy. - Not true. 307 00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:56,157 Let me put down my bag of rats and explain something to you. 308 00:14:56,800 --> 00:15:00,190 - A bag of rats. Are those alive? - I put a dead one in the middle. 309 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:03,431 All the live ones get a good look, they start toeing that line. 310 00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:06,512 - Know what I'm saying? - I very much don't. 311 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:09,151 It's pretty simple. 312 00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:10,878 Take a canvas bag... 313 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:14,872 Jailbreak! 314 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:19,394 You'll do whatever you want with your sister, 315 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:20,959 but Jake's trying to help. 316 00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:24,112 He's a stand-up guy, and I think you should leave him alone. 317 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,236 If you do I think it will be dy-no-mite. 318 00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:29,630 Sorry, I was just watching Good Times in the doctors' lounge. 319 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:32,518 Yeah. I'm gonna screw him to the wall. 320 00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:35,873 Can you believe this guy? 321 00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:37,951 Son, look around. 322 00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:41,476 There's an old man with Alzheimer's who no one bothers to come visit. 323 00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:44,677 I had a chat with a woman who refuses to stop using cocaine. 324 00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:46,239 She's six months pregnant. 325 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,914 Last week I saw an older woman fall and break her hip 326 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,560 because some guy was too busy to hold the door open. 327 00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:53,676 So you laughed and pointed. 328 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:56,672 I didn't say it wasn't funny. I just said it happened. 329 00:15:56,760 --> 00:16:00,594 When's the last time you saw a glimpse of humanity in this place? 330 00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:02,830 Kelso had a point. In the outside world, 331 00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:06,276 you'll see a stream of cars drive by an old woman with a flat tyre. 332 00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:08,749 Around here, every time you round a corner, 333 00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:11,638 - well... - She fell again. 334 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:13,995 Anyway, I knew what I had to do. 335 00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:16,389 Just go. No one here knows your last name. 336 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:18,198 They'll never be able to find you. 337 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:20,794 Go enjoy your rafting thing in New Zealand. 338 00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:23,952 Which, incidentally, is 10,000 miles east of Australia 339 00:16:24,040 --> 00:16:26,429 and famous for alcoholism and clam chowder. 340 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:28,839 Brushing up on New Zealand. 341 00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:31,275 You've been brushing up on New England. 342 00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:34,716 Well, go anyway. Wherever it is you're rafting. 343 00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,870 - Where's he going? - He just left. 344 00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:42,192 Barbie! Go get him! 345 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:44,589 I... believe in you. 346 00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:47,877 No, you don't. You want me to embarrass myself to laugh at me. 347 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:51,270 Like when you told me the hospital fund raiser was a costume party. 348 00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:54,272 I walked into a black-tie dinner as Clarence Thomas. 349 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:55,918 I was in a costume too. 350 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,514 You wore an Armani tux. 351 00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:01,558 I went as someone who doesn't make a fool out of himself. 352 00:17:01,640 --> 00:17:03,392 How'd you not get that? 353 00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:07,439 Thank you. 354 00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:10,753 I just got my sister into the hospital across town. 355 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:13,035 I can finally get her out of this hell hole. 356 00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:15,714 I personally see to it every inch of this building 357 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:18,189 is up to the highest standards and codes. 358 00:17:20,280 --> 00:17:22,271 Well, that's just bad timing. 359 00:17:22,360 --> 00:17:24,316 Get back here! I'm sorry! 360 00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:29,278 Come on, fellas! 361 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:32,030 And then something surprising happened. 362 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:35,873 Well, look who's back. 363 00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:36,949 Look, buddy, I... 364 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,918 I barely know your sister, I certainly don't know you, 365 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:43,470 but she told me what she wanted, and I'm gonna honour that. 366 00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:45,437 I'm gonna go ahead and stay here 367 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:47,829 till I figure out a way to make you understand, 368 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:49,433 even if I have to get a lawyer. 369 00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:51,508 Not you. 370 00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:56,349 They're smart, they are organised, 371 00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:58,237 and they've got my keys. 372 00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:03,116 It's amazing how a selfless gesture can affect so many people. 373 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:06,639 One man saw someone who didn't run away from a problem 374 00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,551 and found the courage to do the same. 375 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:10,949 I got something I'd like to share today. 376 00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:12,758 - Really? - Yeah. 377 00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:16,276 I don't like it when Carla pinches my nipples when we're having sex. 378 00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:19,033 Baby, that's... That's one of the reasons why I cry, 379 00:18:19,120 --> 00:18:22,032 because you pinch them too hard, and it hurts. 380 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:25,268 One man was pushed to make the right decision. 381 00:18:25,360 --> 00:18:27,749 Just make her as comfortable as possible. 382 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:34,030 And another man realised it's OK to be a decent human being for once. 383 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,953 He's definitely leaving for good this time, Barbie. 384 00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:40,429 I'd... I say go for it. 385 00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:43,273 - Why won't you leave me alone? - I don't know. 386 00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:46,716 The NHL is on strike, and I'm not getting my fill of toothless men 387 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:48,677 knocking the hell out of each other. 388 00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:52,548 Maybe because for the first time in four years, I'd like to see you happy. 389 00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:55,108 Believe whatever you want. I don't really care. 390 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:57,077 Jake the Snake is bearing down on you. 391 00:18:57,160 --> 00:18:58,832 If I were you, I'd step up to him, 392 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:02,196 look him straight in the eye with those beautiful blues and... 393 00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:06,112 ...invite him out for a cup of coffee before he escapes. 394 00:19:08,360 --> 00:19:12,273 Hey... Can I buy you a cup of coffee before you escape? 395 00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:15,238 - What now? - I mean... I mean, go. 396 00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:18,278 - Yeah. That'd be nice. - Great. 397 00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:22,471 That's a cute couple. 398 00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:23,959 I give 'em a week. 399 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:26,508 I can make sure of that. 400 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:29,391 - Rat? - No, thanks. 401 00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:31,357 Oh, congratulations, Clarissa. 402 00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:35,712 As for me, seeing Jake come back and do the right thing 403 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:37,791 restored my faith in humanity. 404 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,189 I can't believe that six young men 405 00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:45,558 stopped to help an old lady change a tyre. 406 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:47,631 And don't you forget who put that tyre on 407 00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,711 and tightened those lug nuts, Martha. 408 00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:53,156 OK, sweetie, have fun at the swap meet. Drive safe. 409 00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:56,118 Yep, it sure feels good to do the right thing. 410 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:02,950 Righty loosey, lefty tighty. 411 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,430 Righty tighty, lefty loosey. 412 00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:10,512 Man. It still feels good. 413 00:20:11,305 --> 00:21:11,572 Watch Movies, TV Series and Live Sports Signup Here -> WWW.ADMITME.APP