1 00:00:04,304 --> 00:00:06,181 It was a day of discovery. 2 00:00:06,390 --> 00:00:10,144 I discovered that I could sex my pregnant girlfriend into a coma. 3 00:00:10,436 --> 00:00:11,505 Nice! 4 00:00:12,229 --> 00:00:13,457 Carla discovered that her baby 5 00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:16,445 wasn't the only one who loved breast-feeding. 6 00:00:17,151 --> 00:00:18,823 Are you hungry, sweetie? 7 00:00:19,028 --> 00:00:20,302 I could eat. 8 00:00:22,948 --> 00:00:25,746 Dr Kelso discovered change was not always welcome. 9 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:28,927 A coffee place in a hospital? 10 00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:32,280 What's next, Bob, an ice cream parlour in the morgue? 11 00:00:32,541 --> 00:00:34,372 Admittedly, not a horrible idea, 12 00:00:34,585 --> 00:00:36,064 seeing that the freezers are already down there. 13 00:00:36,253 --> 00:00:38,050 Plus, it'll be a perfect place for kids. 14 00:00:38,255 --> 00:00:41,053 One of our famous vanilla malteds definitely takes the sting 15 00:00:41,300 --> 00:00:44,815 out of having to identify the freshly-charred remains of your father. 16 00:00:45,095 --> 00:00:46,574 Nobody else seems to mind. 17 00:00:50,392 --> 00:00:52,462 I should have worn sun block. 18 00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:57,103 Did you get tickets yet? 19 00:01:00,069 --> 00:01:01,388 Another one! 20 00:01:12,581 --> 00:01:14,856 Now I'm at the end of both lines. 21 00:01:16,794 --> 00:01:17,783 Still, the best discovery 22 00:01:17,961 --> 00:01:20,759 was learning that someone I drummed out of medicine had landed on his feet. 23 00:01:21,006 --> 00:01:23,361 Frontsies! Cabbage! 24 00:01:23,592 --> 00:01:24,866 Hey, Dr D! 25 00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:28,464 That's what we call, "Cabbage-tastic. " 26 00:01:28,681 --> 00:01:29,750 Oh, I love this job. 27 00:01:29,932 --> 00:01:32,605 I screw up, nobody gets hurt except Cindy. 28 00:01:33,435 --> 00:01:35,630 I scalded her pretty bad with some steamed milk. 29 00:01:35,854 --> 00:01:37,890 You could see the bone. 30 00:01:38,107 --> 00:01:40,905 How about a second of that dynamite ape impression? 31 00:01:46,365 --> 00:01:47,480 I'm sorry, Cindy. 32 00:01:47,658 --> 00:01:49,694 Once he's in monkey mode you can't stop him. 33 00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:52,185 But who would want to, right? Cheers. 34 00:01:53,497 --> 00:01:54,691 Hey, Kim. 35 00:01:54,873 --> 00:01:56,784 Just checking to see if your socks are back on 36 00:01:57,000 --> 00:01:58,752 since I knocked them off last night. 37 00:01:58,961 --> 00:02:00,314 Hello! 38 00:02:00,504 --> 00:02:02,813 What am I doing? You're the mother of my child. 39 00:02:03,048 --> 00:02:04,003 That is so tacky. 40 00:02:04,174 --> 00:02:06,972 And so is this. Way to hit that, playah! 41 00:02:07,219 --> 00:02:09,687 - All right! Zoom. Zoom! - Zoom. 42 00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:12,231 - So sorry. - Relax, it's just sex. 43 00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:13,707 We should be able to talk about it. 44 00:02:13,892 --> 00:02:16,804 I'm not telling Isabella she's got a vagina till she turns 18. 45 00:02:17,062 --> 00:02:18,700 That's gonna be an awkward birthday party. 46 00:02:18,897 --> 00:02:22,207 Do not tell my daughter she has a vagina! I'm serious. 47 00:02:22,651 --> 00:02:24,369 It may have already come up. 48 00:02:24,570 --> 00:02:27,289 Kim, J.D. tells us you're looking around town for a new job. 49 00:02:27,531 --> 00:02:30,921 Yeah, I just don't think the department head here is ever gonna promote me. 50 00:02:31,201 --> 00:02:32,429 Why? 51 00:02:33,328 --> 00:02:35,364 Dr Lemke, you're gonna love this. 52 00:02:35,581 --> 00:02:37,060 We're a husband and wife piano-playing team, 53 00:02:37,249 --> 00:02:39,479 only I have no hands. 54 00:02:48,052 --> 00:02:51,044 - With my head. - How great is that? 55 00:02:51,305 --> 00:02:53,421 This is my wife, Sally. 56 00:02:53,640 --> 00:02:54,629 She lost her thumbs last month 57 00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:57,800 when our pet Komodo dragon, Morty, got out of his cage. 58 00:03:01,023 --> 00:03:03,742 On the bright side, you have beautiful nubs. 59 00:03:05,736 --> 00:03:07,567 A tip jar? Really? 60 00:03:07,780 --> 00:03:10,578 So, what am I supposed to do, just duke you my change 61 00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:12,462 because you poured hot water through beans? 62 00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:15,332 Well, I tell you what, my friend, unless you're also planning on giving me 63 00:03:15,579 --> 00:03:17,615 a complimentary reach-around with my beverage, 64 00:03:17,831 --> 00:03:20,265 I'm afraid the answer is, yeah, no! 65 00:03:21,251 --> 00:03:22,479 Here's a novel idea. 66 00:03:22,669 --> 00:03:24,625 Why don't you go fetch me a very large cup of coffee 67 00:03:24,838 --> 00:03:28,990 with so damn many fake sugars in it that the coffee itself gets cancer? 68 00:03:30,260 --> 00:03:32,854 Guys, guys, I've got a good one. Is it me or does someone... 69 00:03:33,097 --> 00:03:35,895 ...someone need to switch to decaf? ... someone need to switch to decaf? 70 00:03:37,226 --> 00:03:40,423 Lay off of Elliot. She doesn't watch as much old TV as we do. 71 00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:43,311 You actually stood up for me. 72 00:03:43,524 --> 00:03:44,673 But now I'm forced to ask, 73 00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:47,531 "Who are you and what have you done with Turk?" 74 00:03:47,778 --> 00:03:50,611 - Stop finishing my awesome jokes! - Oh, my God. 75 00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:12,416 She's so beautiful. Can I hold her? 76 00:04:12,636 --> 00:04:13,625 That's up to Turk. 77 00:04:13,804 --> 00:04:16,716 He's kind of paranoid about people dropping her. 78 00:04:19,435 --> 00:04:22,347 Yeah, you've got decent hands. Go ahead. 79 00:04:22,604 --> 00:04:24,959 I get her first because we're best friends. 80 00:04:25,190 --> 00:04:26,908 Elliot. Ted, give it! 81 00:04:29,611 --> 00:04:30,805 I'm next. 82 00:04:32,322 --> 00:04:34,233 - What? - You drop everything. 83 00:04:34,450 --> 00:04:35,803 When do... 84 00:04:36,869 --> 00:04:37,858 Besides now. 85 00:04:38,037 --> 00:04:42,553 Look, come on, it is a human life. I'll focus. Give it to me. Right here. 86 00:04:45,711 --> 00:04:47,110 Wait, one moresie! 87 00:04:47,296 --> 00:04:50,527 So, Carla, how much time do you think you'll take off? 88 00:04:52,217 --> 00:04:55,971 Look at this little angel. I may never go back to work. 89 00:04:59,892 --> 00:05:01,450 I heard suckling. 90 00:05:05,397 --> 00:05:07,991 So, you're having chest pains, Mr Turner. 91 00:05:08,233 --> 00:05:10,303 Actually, it's Dr Turner. 92 00:05:10,527 --> 00:05:12,518 You look like someone I used to date. 93 00:05:12,738 --> 00:05:14,091 I had a brief "older guy" jones, 94 00:05:14,281 --> 00:05:15,714 but now I'm with someone more age-appropriate 95 00:05:15,908 --> 00:05:18,547 and I'm like, "What was I thinking?" 96 00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:19,935 We are disgusting. 97 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:22,588 Yeah, but for some reason, I was curious. 98 00:05:22,831 --> 00:05:26,062 - Anyhoo, we'll just run the usual tests. - Sounds good. 99 00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:31,518 Dr Turner seems like a nice guy and he's hot. 100 00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:35,394 You know, like if you left Brad Pitt out in the sun forever. 101 00:05:35,678 --> 00:05:38,067 Stop it, Elliot, it took you months to get over that old man fetish. 102 00:05:38,305 --> 00:05:40,899 Blondie, he is private practise. 103 00:05:41,141 --> 00:05:42,494 Those guys are cocky jackasses 104 00:05:42,685 --> 00:05:46,280 who don't give two shakes about anybody else's opinion but their own. 105 00:05:46,563 --> 00:05:49,123 They're me, with one addendum, they're whores. 106 00:05:49,358 --> 00:05:52,270 And I'm not talking about the good kind of whores, like my ex-wife. 107 00:05:52,528 --> 00:05:54,200 They're whores for money. 108 00:05:54,405 --> 00:05:56,839 - Is that a tip jar? - Look. 109 00:05:58,450 --> 00:06:01,362 I'm figuring if those lumps down at the coffee shop can have one, I can, too. 110 00:06:01,620 --> 00:06:04,009 Listen to me, you may like Turner right now, 111 00:06:04,248 --> 00:06:06,364 but he is a doctor and doctors make terrible patients. 112 00:06:06,583 --> 00:06:09,256 Sooner or later, they all try to treat themselves. 113 00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:12,597 - Perry, a quick word... - Bobbo, no time! 114 00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:15,035 Gotta go tell Mr Clancy that his tumour is benign. 115 00:06:15,259 --> 00:06:16,248 Is that not exciting? 116 00:06:16,427 --> 00:06:19,180 Should be worth a finsky. What do you think? 117 00:06:21,807 --> 00:06:24,162 - Where the hell did you all come from? - Sneak attack. 118 00:06:24,393 --> 00:06:26,304 You can put your shoes on again, guys, nice work. 119 00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:28,636 Dr Kelso, as spokesman for the support staff of this hospital, 120 00:06:28,856 --> 00:06:29,845 I have a request. 121 00:06:30,024 --> 00:06:33,858 I do not want to hear any more about a college scholarship fund. 122 00:06:34,153 --> 00:06:36,713 Stop filling your children's heads with nonsense. 123 00:06:36,947 --> 00:06:37,936 Pull them out of high school 124 00:06:38,115 --> 00:06:40,310 and teach them a trade like plumbing or undertaking. 125 00:06:40,534 --> 00:06:43,685 None of us here even have kids, except for Margo and she sold hers. 126 00:06:43,954 --> 00:06:46,593 - We want a dental plan. - Dental is for old people. 127 00:06:46,832 --> 00:06:50,541 You young bucks have years before you have to worry about your choppers. 128 00:06:50,836 --> 00:06:52,588 One, two... 129 00:06:56,258 --> 00:06:57,771 Lovely. No. 130 00:07:00,637 --> 00:07:03,993 Rudy, did you tear an actual tooth out of your head? 131 00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:07,739 We're all faking it, man. What are you... 132 00:07:07,978 --> 00:07:08,967 Okay, don't worry. You know what? 133 00:07:09,146 --> 00:07:12,058 I've got a jar of monkey teeth in my workbench. What's that, molar? 134 00:07:12,316 --> 00:07:13,669 We're gonna be all right. 135 00:07:17,529 --> 00:07:18,962 Man, we got smoked. 136 00:07:19,156 --> 00:07:22,114 That's what we get for playing a bunch of G's from the hood. 137 00:07:22,368 --> 00:07:24,199 Those guys are Indian. 138 00:07:25,287 --> 00:07:28,643 So, Rajesh isn't one of those cool, black-only names like, "Anfernee"? 139 00:07:28,916 --> 00:07:31,476 No, Rajesh is like "Steve" in India. 140 00:07:31,710 --> 00:07:32,699 Yeah. 141 00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:34,705 Why are we stopping? 142 00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:37,075 You always buy me a cotton candy after the game 143 00:07:37,299 --> 00:07:38,812 to celebrate my good sportsmanship. 144 00:07:39,009 --> 00:07:39,998 Yeah, well, you know what? 145 00:07:40,177 --> 00:07:41,371 I can't be buying you stuff all the time. 146 00:07:41,553 --> 00:07:43,669 Yeah, well, I'm very close to a tantrum. 147 00:07:43,889 --> 00:07:46,449 Could you guys look at my shoulder? I tweaked it pretty good. 148 00:07:46,684 --> 00:07:47,639 Come on, Vijay. 149 00:07:47,810 --> 00:07:49,721 First you dunk on me and yell, "Who's your bitch?" 150 00:07:49,937 --> 00:07:51,370 Now you want free medical advice? 151 00:07:51,563 --> 00:07:53,440 How did I not know these guys were Indian? 152 00:07:53,649 --> 00:07:54,718 I'll give you 20 bucks. 153 00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:57,653 I'm sorry, my friend, but that's just unethical. 154 00:07:57,903 --> 00:07:59,814 Done and done. 155 00:08:03,075 --> 00:08:04,554 Who's the new guy? 156 00:08:04,743 --> 00:08:06,859 This is Dr Kershnar from my practise. 157 00:08:07,079 --> 00:08:10,958 Elliot Reid, I was telling you about. Give her a wave. Attaboy. So... 158 00:08:11,250 --> 00:08:12,239 Look, as a doctor, 159 00:08:12,418 --> 00:08:14,693 I know that you're gonna be tempted to want to treat yourself, 160 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:17,434 and I just want you to know that's not gonna fly with me. 161 00:08:17,673 --> 00:08:19,550 - Understood. - Great. 162 00:08:19,758 --> 00:08:20,747 Now, I believe that surgery 163 00:08:20,926 --> 00:08:22,882 on your abdominal aortic aneurism's gonna be too aggressive. 164 00:08:23,095 --> 00:08:25,086 I'd like to start you on 25 grams of Lopressor. 165 00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:28,377 - Don't you mean 25 milligrams? - There, see? 166 00:08:28,642 --> 00:08:30,997 You're already trying to treat yourself. That was a test. 167 00:08:31,228 --> 00:08:33,947 - But 25 grams would kill me. - I know. 168 00:08:35,190 --> 00:08:37,704 - But it's still a test. - Fine. 169 00:08:38,861 --> 00:08:41,375 From now on, you're the doctor. 170 00:08:45,325 --> 00:08:48,954 All right, relax. You're fine. Just ice it when you get home. 171 00:08:50,581 --> 00:08:52,094 Zoom? 172 00:08:52,291 --> 00:08:54,168 Put that away, Turk! That's back-alley money! 173 00:08:54,376 --> 00:08:56,287 - Relax. - Hey! 174 00:08:56,503 --> 00:08:58,812 I'll give you 20 bucks if you check out my rash. 175 00:08:59,048 --> 00:09:01,084 I'm sorry, Cotton Candy Man, 176 00:09:01,300 --> 00:09:04,895 but unlike my friend here, I have no interest in being sued for... 177 00:09:05,179 --> 00:09:07,773 - Do I smell blue? - Just added the dye. 178 00:09:09,058 --> 00:09:13,370 You crafty, crafty man! That is fluffing up nicely. 179 00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:16,247 Hey, give me some money. I'm jonesing for some C-squared. 180 00:09:16,482 --> 00:09:19,280 You don't want my "back-alley money," do you? 181 00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:21,517 You heartless bastard. 182 00:09:21,737 --> 00:09:24,410 All right, let's see your disgusting rash. 183 00:09:26,950 --> 00:09:29,384 It's probably just eczema. One blue, please. 184 00:09:36,293 --> 00:09:38,807 I'd like to see the blueberry again. 185 00:09:42,841 --> 00:09:44,672 Blueberries taste fresh. 186 00:09:46,095 --> 00:09:48,768 Hint of lemon zest. I'm intrigued. 187 00:09:50,641 --> 00:09:54,236 And, unfortunately, processed flour. No, thank you. 188 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:56,317 Let me try your carrot. 189 00:10:00,526 --> 00:10:03,916 I have a non-fat latte with room for schnapps for Janitor? 190 00:10:04,196 --> 00:10:06,107 Yep. Thank you. 191 00:10:07,825 --> 00:10:09,895 - Nice braces. - Yeah. 192 00:10:10,119 --> 00:10:13,156 You're not worried about the spider monkeys? 193 00:10:13,414 --> 00:10:14,403 Spider monkeys? 194 00:10:14,581 --> 00:10:18,415 Spider monkeys see intricate metalwork as a display of dominance. 195 00:10:18,711 --> 00:10:21,305 It's a threat to them. They tear your eyes out. 196 00:10:21,547 --> 00:10:23,822 Well, I'm just psyched this place is paying for them. 197 00:10:24,049 --> 00:10:25,641 You get dental? 198 00:10:29,471 --> 00:10:33,180 So, Dr Turner said that I am a very talented young physician. 199 00:10:33,475 --> 00:10:37,434 Jordan said I'm the only man she ever wants to have sex with. 200 00:10:39,189 --> 00:10:40,622 Aren't we sharing fantastic lies 201 00:10:40,816 --> 00:10:42,772 we choose to believe for personal reasons? 202 00:10:42,985 --> 00:10:44,703 He's actually a very deferential patient. 203 00:10:44,903 --> 00:10:47,212 Instead of surgery, I'm treating his AAA with drugs. 204 00:10:47,448 --> 00:10:48,483 Dope! 205 00:10:48,657 --> 00:10:52,730 I think Dr Chatterbox there scheduled him for surgery. 206 00:10:53,037 --> 00:10:54,709 What the hell, Kersh? 207 00:10:57,041 --> 00:10:59,316 I don't care if we had extra coffee money left over, 208 00:10:59,543 --> 00:11:02,103 I don't feel right taking that guy's cash. 209 00:11:02,337 --> 00:11:05,056 Dude, stop stressing. See you later. 210 00:11:07,426 --> 00:11:09,860 Is anybody planning on emptying that? 211 00:11:12,056 --> 00:11:15,605 Sometimes everything you need to know is on the side of a coffee cup. 212 00:11:16,435 --> 00:11:21,111 "Never underestimate those around you for they may betray you. " 213 00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:24,000 Greetings, customer! What can I get you? 214 00:11:27,404 --> 00:11:29,122 "They may deceive you. " 215 00:11:29,323 --> 00:11:30,915 And here we are. 216 00:11:31,116 --> 00:11:33,505 Even though Kershnar's signature is on the chart, 217 00:11:33,744 --> 00:11:36,622 this is the gentleman who ordered the surgery. 218 00:11:36,872 --> 00:11:39,227 No, he didn't. Tell him. 219 00:11:39,458 --> 00:11:41,369 What would you like me to say? 220 00:11:41,585 --> 00:11:45,214 I'm just gonna go ahead and tip myself for calling this one. 221 00:11:46,090 --> 00:11:49,287 Thank you, me! 222 00:11:50,469 --> 00:11:54,508 "In the end, those same people will make you wish you'd never met them. " 223 00:11:55,557 --> 00:11:58,947 Maybe that wasn't just a rash on Cotton Candy Man. 224 00:12:04,733 --> 00:12:07,008 I didn't tell Kim about how I most likely ruined my career 225 00:12:07,236 --> 00:12:09,591 by misdiagnosing the Cotton Candy Man. 226 00:12:09,822 --> 00:12:12,939 I don't like to be a burden to the people I care about. 227 00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,509 Turk, I need you and I need you now. 228 00:12:15,744 --> 00:12:19,657 Isabella, this is the man you'll be competing with for your father's love. 229 00:12:19,957 --> 00:12:21,993 Goochy-goochy-goo. Turk, now! 230 00:12:23,210 --> 00:12:27,676 - Baby, he's using his emergency tone. - Go ahead, I have to feed her anyway. 231 00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:33,167 My breasts are so sore. I wish I could just give you formula. 232 00:12:33,470 --> 00:12:37,543 Formula's bad for the baby. Boob milk's healthier. 233 00:12:40,019 --> 00:12:41,088 His rash was probably purpura 234 00:12:41,270 --> 00:12:43,022 from disseminated intravascular coagulopathy, 235 00:12:43,230 --> 00:12:45,425 and I missed it, Turk. I'm screwed. 236 00:12:45,649 --> 00:12:48,846 Okay, you go in there and take care of things. I'll... 237 00:12:49,111 --> 00:12:50,100 I'll just stand out here 238 00:12:50,279 --> 00:12:53,589 and think about all the things I'll miss about being a doctor. 239 00:12:53,866 --> 00:12:57,381 The light cotton outfits, the free gauze. 240 00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:03,568 He's gone. 241 00:13:05,669 --> 00:13:06,988 Somebody shot him. 242 00:13:09,173 --> 00:13:12,529 I hope it wasn't the Corn Dog Guy. They never got along. 243 00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:18,110 Look, Dr Turner, you're older, you're not in the best health. 244 00:13:18,390 --> 00:13:20,904 I really think that this surgery could kill you. 245 00:13:21,143 --> 00:13:23,498 Are they gonna come in and shave me soon? 246 00:13:23,729 --> 00:13:27,404 - I'm still your primary physician. - No, Kershnar's my lead now. 247 00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:31,794 I think surgery is the right choice. 248 00:13:32,029 --> 00:13:33,940 What? Did you give him cue cards? 249 00:13:34,156 --> 00:13:36,465 That way he gets it exactly right. 250 00:13:39,995 --> 00:13:41,314 You don't scare me. 251 00:13:41,497 --> 00:13:44,455 Eventually, you will all come crawling back. 252 00:13:44,708 --> 00:13:45,743 Now, how about somebody gets me 253 00:13:45,918 --> 00:13:48,637 a banana nut muffin and hold the spit, please. 254 00:13:48,879 --> 00:13:52,667 As manager, I reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. 255 00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:54,194 Manager? 256 00:13:54,385 --> 00:13:57,934 - You have worked here one day. - Corporate loved my ingenuity. 257 00:13:58,222 --> 00:14:00,782 I was saying, the two most addictive substances on Earth 258 00:14:01,016 --> 00:14:03,735 are caffeine and nicotine. 259 00:14:05,270 --> 00:14:06,498 Behold. 260 00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:12,945 Smoke-accino for Kyle. 261 00:14:13,237 --> 00:14:16,752 Kyle? Smoke-accino for Kyle. Enjoy that. 262 00:14:18,158 --> 00:14:20,467 That's as tall as he's gonna get. 263 00:14:21,912 --> 00:14:23,425 I feel like I dodged a bullet. 264 00:14:23,622 --> 00:14:25,897 Trust me, Brown Bear, you don't want this hanging over your head. 265 00:14:26,125 --> 00:14:28,036 Find Vijay and give him his 20 bucks back. 266 00:14:28,252 --> 00:14:30,971 Yeah, but then I'd have to give the money back to all the others. 267 00:14:31,213 --> 00:14:33,204 I kind of did a few diagnoses at the mall yesterday. 268 00:14:33,424 --> 00:14:35,984 Are you crazy? You could get sued. 269 00:14:36,218 --> 00:14:38,095 Secondly, I can't believe you went to the mall without me. 270 00:14:38,303 --> 00:14:40,134 I specifically told you I needed to buy loafers. 271 00:14:40,347 --> 00:14:42,144 And, thirdly, how could you go to the mall without me? 272 00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:43,338 That's our thing! 273 00:14:43,517 --> 00:14:46,236 Well, I don't see you giving the money back to Cotton Candy Man. 274 00:14:46,478 --> 00:14:48,514 As a matter of fact, I already did. 275 00:14:51,525 --> 00:14:53,595 A 20! Score! 276 00:14:56,155 --> 00:14:58,032 Cool shirt. 277 00:14:58,532 --> 00:14:59,885 All right, I earned that money, 278 00:15:00,075 --> 00:15:03,545 and I'm not giving it back and there's nothing you can do to make me. 279 00:15:03,829 --> 00:15:05,945 Give those people their money back! 280 00:15:06,165 --> 00:15:08,520 - I can't believe you told. - Turk, we're doctors. 281 00:15:08,751 --> 00:15:10,742 We live by a moral code. 282 00:15:10,961 --> 00:15:14,271 Aloha! I came to see the little kahuna. 283 00:15:17,176 --> 00:15:18,131 Giant coffee. 284 00:15:18,302 --> 00:15:20,862 Saw you coming. Here's your venti drip. 285 00:15:21,096 --> 00:15:24,054 Say, how about a Corinne Bailey Rae CD? 286 00:15:24,308 --> 00:15:26,185 With her stripped-down sound and chilled-out vibe, 287 00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:30,306 this British soul superstar is one of the year's hottest newcomers. 288 00:15:31,690 --> 00:15:34,204 You know what? I'll take one of those. 289 00:15:35,110 --> 00:15:36,338 It's a sale. 290 00:15:37,196 --> 00:15:39,710 You know the worst thing about Turner's surgery? 291 00:15:39,948 --> 00:15:43,941 I'm gonna be right, but he's gonna die. It'll be a hollow victory. 292 00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:45,393 If I got to be right 293 00:15:45,579 --> 00:15:49,333 and have a private practise doctor die due to his own idiocy, 294 00:15:49,625 --> 00:15:52,219 I would call that a pretty full victory. 295 00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:58,668 - Banana nut muffin, please. - Sir, I've been told not to serve you. 296 00:16:03,389 --> 00:16:05,778 Hey! Just take me. 297 00:16:06,016 --> 00:16:08,325 What are they gonna do, put you in jail? 298 00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:11,711 You're Bob Kelso. Just grab me and run. 299 00:16:12,856 --> 00:16:13,971 Do it! 300 00:16:23,701 --> 00:16:26,898 All right, I'm going on break. Don't touch the muffin puppet. 301 00:16:31,458 --> 00:16:34,291 Let's see if you're qualified to hold your own baby. 302 00:16:38,924 --> 00:16:40,915 I caught it! That counts. 303 00:16:43,220 --> 00:16:45,973 I'm gonna go hold the crap out of that baby! 304 00:16:46,849 --> 00:16:49,682 J.D., what the hell? I'm a surgeon. That could have hit my hand. 305 00:16:49,935 --> 00:16:51,084 Why are you being so weird lately? 306 00:16:51,270 --> 00:16:52,749 You won't loan me money for cotton candy, 307 00:16:52,938 --> 00:16:54,929 you're charging strangers for medical advice, 308 00:16:55,149 --> 00:16:56,662 and now you're worried about your hand? 309 00:16:56,859 --> 00:16:57,848 Who are you? 310 00:16:58,027 --> 00:17:00,302 ...and what did you do with Turk? ... and what did you do with Turk? 311 00:17:00,529 --> 00:17:02,884 Great work, everybody, thank you. 312 00:17:03,824 --> 00:17:05,462 I asked them to help me out for emphasis. 313 00:17:05,659 --> 00:17:06,978 Seriously, what's going on? 314 00:17:07,161 --> 00:17:09,152 You saw how it happened yesterday. 315 00:17:10,414 --> 00:17:14,009 Look at this little angel. I may never go back to work. 316 00:17:18,088 --> 00:17:22,081 How the hell am I supposed to take care of a whole family by myself? 317 00:17:25,137 --> 00:17:27,287 I'm so sorry, Barbie. 318 00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:29,152 Why didn't he listen? 319 00:17:34,271 --> 00:17:35,704 I thought that you hated him. 320 00:17:35,898 --> 00:17:39,686 When it comes to torturing you, everybody's on the same page. 321 00:17:39,985 --> 00:17:43,500 You know, Reid, you had the cojones to stand up to me, 322 00:17:43,781 --> 00:17:46,773 unlike Kershnar, whom I've so demoralised 323 00:17:47,034 --> 00:17:50,071 he's basically my trained chimp. 324 00:17:56,335 --> 00:17:57,893 He's almost human. 325 00:17:59,213 --> 00:18:04,367 Anyway, I've got enough yes-men, you've got a spine, join my practise. 326 00:18:04,718 --> 00:18:06,197 You could still work out of this hospital. 327 00:18:06,387 --> 00:18:10,062 The only difference is you'd make double the money. 328 00:18:10,349 --> 00:18:12,419 Easy, buddy. That smell burning your nostrils 329 00:18:12,643 --> 00:18:15,077 isn't just the baby throw up on her jacket. 330 00:18:15,312 --> 00:18:17,348 I got to hold Isabella. 331 00:18:17,564 --> 00:18:20,681 She squirted out of my arms, but Carla caught her. 332 00:18:20,943 --> 00:18:23,935 That's the smell of a doctor with integrity. 333 00:18:24,196 --> 00:18:27,313 Also, you'll never have to answer to this guy again. 334 00:18:36,709 --> 00:18:39,985 - Wow, I got a family. - I know. 335 00:18:40,254 --> 00:18:43,007 In seven months, I'm gonna have a family, too. 336 00:18:44,758 --> 00:18:49,070 Did you ever think we'd be here back when we were freshmen in college? 337 00:18:49,388 --> 00:18:52,141 Remember that first week when I found you hooking up with my girlfriend 338 00:18:52,391 --> 00:18:54,382 and you said you guys were only naked underneath the covers 339 00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:56,831 because you'd had a water balloon fight and you were cold? 340 00:18:57,062 --> 00:18:59,622 J.D., for the last time, nothing happened. 341 00:18:59,857 --> 00:19:02,007 Please, this isn't about that. 342 00:19:03,694 --> 00:19:07,289 It's just that I looked all over, I never found any balloons. 343 00:19:07,614 --> 00:19:10,003 You think there'd be some balloons. 344 00:19:10,826 --> 00:19:13,181 I look at Isabella and I get really scared 345 00:19:13,412 --> 00:19:15,846 and I'm gonna need you to be there to help me through this. 346 00:19:16,081 --> 00:19:18,231 Well, that sucks because I was counting on you to make it look easy 347 00:19:18,459 --> 00:19:20,893 so I know I can handle it when my turn comes. 348 00:19:21,337 --> 00:19:22,531 Awesome. 349 00:19:24,006 --> 00:19:26,645 Turk, you're at the beginning of your career. 350 00:19:26,884 --> 00:19:29,000 You know you're gonna make plenty of money. 351 00:19:29,219 --> 00:19:31,858 It's good to hear that from you, thank you. 352 00:19:32,097 --> 00:19:35,134 - You're gonna be just fine. - I suppose so. 353 00:19:37,811 --> 00:19:39,961 - Totally fine. - Yeah. 354 00:19:40,731 --> 00:19:42,528 Would you mind telling me that I'm gonna be fine, Turk? 355 00:19:42,733 --> 00:19:44,405 Am I gonna be fine? I think I'm gonna be fine. 356 00:19:44,610 --> 00:19:47,602 Well, I would, but I don't know how much you like Kim. 357 00:19:47,863 --> 00:19:51,014 - I really like her. - Then, you're gonna be fine. 358 00:19:52,701 --> 00:19:53,850 Thanks. 359 00:19:56,872 --> 00:20:00,228 Is there anything else you wanna tell me or admit to? 360 00:20:02,169 --> 00:20:06,082 I mean, I looked everywhere. There was no signs of balloons. 361 00:20:07,383 --> 00:20:09,453 Opportunities are everywhere. 362 00:20:10,803 --> 00:20:13,237 Whether it's accepting an old job... 363 00:20:13,472 --> 00:20:14,621 Hey. 364 00:20:17,559 --> 00:20:19,436 You can have your dental. 365 00:20:21,397 --> 00:20:23,194 Now clean up this mess. 366 00:20:28,946 --> 00:20:30,743 ...or taking a new job. 367 00:20:32,032 --> 00:20:34,262 I'd like to join your practise. 368 00:20:39,373 --> 00:20:41,682 As for me, I was just excited to have the opportunity 369 00:20:41,917 --> 00:20:44,226 to get to know the mother of my child better. 370 00:20:44,461 --> 00:20:47,771 - I got offered a new job. - Cool! Is it over at County? 371 00:20:48,048 --> 00:20:50,721 Because that way I can drop you off every morning. 372 00:20:50,968 --> 00:20:52,924 It's in Tacoma, Washington. 373 00:20:56,473 --> 00:20:59,271 That's gonna be a little rough on my scooter.