1
00:00:03,036 --> 00:00:04,094
One week teaching here

2
00:00:04,137 --> 00:00:06,230
and already I was falling back
into old rhythms

3
00:00:06,272 --> 00:00:08,604
with my friend and mentor, Perry Cox.

4
00:00:08,641 --> 00:00:10,370
Beautiful day, huh, Big Per?

5
00:00:10,410 --> 00:00:12,139
Dear God, Newbie,
where'd you come from?

6
00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:14,305
- Don't tell me you're following me.
- Following you?

7
00:00:14,347 --> 00:00:16,508
We've been walking together
and falling into old rhythms

8
00:00:16,549 --> 00:00:17,777
since the parking structure.

9
00:00:17,817 --> 00:00:20,479
I told you about my new shampoo
and how it's infused with honey...

10
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:23,080
Hold that thought. Forever.

11
00:00:23,123 --> 00:00:24,488
Hey, you.

12
00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:28,183
Now did I or did I not handcraft you
something to wear

13
00:00:28,228 --> 00:00:30,287
that symbolizes
your importance to me?

14
00:00:30,330 --> 00:00:32,195
What is it? If he won't wear it, I will.
Is it a cloak?

15
00:00:32,232 --> 00:00:33,699
'Cause I'd look dynamite
in a cloak.

16
00:00:33,733 --> 00:00:36,497
He is to always wear a sign
that says "Number One."

17
00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:38,936
It signifies that he is
the one med student

18
00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:41,702
- for which I have hope.
- Thanks. It's a nightmare.

19
00:00:41,741 --> 00:00:43,766
All the best, Number One.

20
00:00:44,811 --> 00:00:46,073
You don't have to wear this.

21
00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:49,513
I mean, look how silly it looks on me,
you know?

22
00:00:49,916 --> 00:00:51,213
I hate wearing this so much.

23
00:00:52,352 --> 00:00:54,980
He said, "You put that on you,"
and he was yelling.

24
00:00:55,021 --> 00:00:56,511
I was like, "Okay, don't get mad."

25
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:59,047
But I don't wanna wear it. I don't.

26
00:01:00,794 --> 00:01:03,354
- Guard that, Number One.
- No!

27
00:01:04,197 --> 00:01:06,631
- You're dangerous, aren't you?
- Yes, I am.

28
00:01:06,666 --> 00:01:08,861
Bet you listen to rap music.

29
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:15,341
There he is.
No one has sex with Lucy Bennett,

30
00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:17,969
takes naked pictures of her
and gets away with it.

31
00:01:18,011 --> 00:01:21,674
Cole, I'm not sure I like what you did.

32
00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:23,246
Served.

33
00:01:23,283 --> 00:01:27,652
I know I blew any chance of us
being together again, and that kills me.

34
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:30,683
Man, I'm sorry,
I just need to think about

35
00:01:30,723 --> 00:01:32,520
who I am for a second, you know?

36
00:01:33,059 --> 00:01:35,391
What's up, boo? What're you doing?

37
00:01:35,962 --> 00:01:38,692
Making sure these machines
keep this vegetable alive.

38
00:01:38,731 --> 00:01:41,222
Man, I wish his family
would just let him die.

39
00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:42,666
Cool, cool.

40
00:01:43,436 --> 00:01:47,372
So, what are we going to do about this?

41
00:01:47,407 --> 00:01:51,639
- What the hell are you talking about?
- I'm talking about this electricity.

42
00:01:51,678 --> 00:01:53,339
This spark. Zzzt.

43
00:01:54,647 --> 00:01:56,615
- Go now.
- Okay.

44
00:01:58,184 --> 00:02:01,051
Here's a little secret
about Old King Cole.

45
00:02:01,087 --> 00:02:03,248
The only way to get rid of him

46
00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:07,385
is to sleep with him
until he gets bored with you.

47
00:02:08,094 --> 00:02:12,793
Yeah, I'm gonna go get a wire brush
and scrub my skin till I bleed.

48
00:02:13,833 --> 00:02:18,293
All right, class, first order of business
is simple. We're gonna take out our...

49
00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:21,703
- J.D., what are you doing?
- Just watching you teach.

50
00:02:21,741 --> 00:02:22,765
You know, in this light,

51
00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:25,369
you look like Denzel Washington
in The Great Debaters.

52
00:02:25,411 --> 00:02:28,812
Come on, man, I'm working here!
Now, listen, if you...

53
00:02:28,848 --> 00:02:30,042
You know
that's what I was going for, right?

54
00:02:30,083 --> 00:02:31,448
It's pretty obvious.

55
00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:33,418
All right, class,
you now have 30 seconds

56
00:02:33,453 --> 00:02:35,148
to list the adductor muscles of the hip.

57
00:02:35,188 --> 00:02:38,351
Your group does not want to be last.
Ready, go.

58
00:02:38,391 --> 00:02:41,155
The pressure here
can make some students crack.

59
00:02:44,330 --> 00:02:48,289
Amir, you can't just be grabbing
kidneys like that! Bring it back!

60
00:02:48,468 --> 00:02:51,028
Others found ways
to blow off steam.

61
00:02:51,704 --> 00:02:52,728
Um...

62
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,266
What? What are you doing?
No, stop. Take it off.

63
00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:57,640
I can't. He'll know. He's everywhere.
And the worst part...

64
00:02:57,677 --> 00:03:00,237
Drew, I don't care. I'm losing wood.

65
00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:03,181
And Dr. Cox made sure
that the pressure never let up.

66
00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:07,550
Centerfold, your previous answer was
so wrong, it almost became right again.

67
00:03:07,587 --> 00:03:09,612
Now, if you would,
please help me choose the subject

68
00:03:09,656 --> 00:03:11,180
for my impending criticism.

69
00:03:11,224 --> 00:03:13,215
Would you like me to nail you for,

70
00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:17,025
A, your being too attractive
to ever be taken seriously as a doctor,

71
00:03:17,063 --> 00:03:18,496
B, your upsettingly small ears,

72
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:21,466
or C, that your stupidity
is probably contagious?

73
00:03:21,734 --> 00:03:25,329
- I guess my contagious stupidity.
- Great call. Your ears.

74
00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:26,895
Ah-ha-ha.

75
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:30,637
Welcome, welcome, Number One.
Certainly, with your human-sized ears,

76
00:03:30,677 --> 00:03:31,701
you can tell us

77
00:03:31,744 --> 00:03:35,236
what the three components of
the mucosal layer of the stomach are.

78
00:03:35,281 --> 00:03:38,250
Epithelium, lamina propria,
muscularis mucosae.

79
00:03:38,451 --> 00:03:40,146
That was perfect.

80
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,255
Okay, class, who hates
Dr. Cox's favorite student?

81
00:03:43,289 --> 00:03:44,313
- Me.
- I do.

82
00:03:44,357 --> 00:03:48,623
Wow. It's the first time you assassins
have gotten one right all day.

83
00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:51,759
There was one bright light
for these kids, though,

84
00:03:51,798 --> 00:03:54,062
and that was me, Dr. D.

85
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:58,667
Hey, bro, the sun is, like, super bright.
Can you come down?

86
00:03:58,705 --> 00:04:00,764
I, like, told you that the branches

87
00:04:00,807 --> 00:04:03,139
are a metaphor
for the cardiovascular system.

88
00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:07,169
So, no, I cannot come down.
Hence, tree-class dismissed.

89
00:04:08,681 --> 00:04:10,376
Great class, Dr. D.

90
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:12,907
Even better than the one you did
with interpretive dance.

91
00:04:12,952 --> 00:04:15,250
Thanks. I call it teacher-tainment.

92
00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:18,018
Would you be a doll
and get a message to Dr. Turk ASAP?

93
00:04:18,057 --> 00:04:19,684
Tell him I'm stuck in the tree again,

94
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:21,785
but this time there appear to be
many bees.

95
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:25,363
Hurry, Lucy, I've got honey hair!

96
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:31,728
That tool Cole keeps texting me.
"I have a little Cole for your slaw."

97
00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:32,999
So romantic. You should hit that.

98
00:04:33,039 --> 00:04:35,633
At least Dr. Cox doesn't make you send
a picture of yourself every 10 minutes

99
00:04:35,675 --> 00:04:36,835
wearing a "Number One" sign.

100
00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:38,605
- Wait a minute, what are we doing?
- Talking.

101
00:04:38,645 --> 00:04:40,977
No. This feels like sharing.
And it's gross.

102
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:45,212
Drew, I need to be clear about what
it is I'm looking for, you know, with us.

103
00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:47,085
- Nothing.
- Same here.

104
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:50,578
- Sorry about the sharing.
- Oh, no, no, it was both of us.

105
00:04:52,992 --> 00:04:55,552
Oh, now that's just outstanding.

106
00:04:56,229 --> 00:04:59,198
- Dude. Again?
- Finally. Where have you been?

107
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:01,928
I came as soon as I heard.
I thought you said there were bees.

108
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,697
- Where are the bees?
- They're quiet now,

109
00:05:03,736 --> 00:05:06,603
but I think they're plotting
something big.

110
00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:09,498
- Let's get him out of there.
- Hell, yeah.

111
00:05:09,542 --> 00:05:12,102
Give me a chance
to use old Megan Fox.

112
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:13,407
That's just a tranq gun.

113
00:05:13,446 --> 00:05:16,210
It's an elephant dose, but don't worry,
we cut it with some diet soda.

114
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:19,343
- Can't we just shake the tree again?
- Go shake.

115
00:05:20,386 --> 00:05:22,081
Come on, little white baby.
Jump into my arms.

116
00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:25,924
You all right?

117
00:05:25,958 --> 00:05:29,086
It's like being held
by a big piece of caramel.

118
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:37,074
Watch Movies, TV Series and Live Sports
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119
00:05:45,211 --> 00:05:46,838
You never want to end up
in Dr. Cox's eye line

120
00:05:46,879 --> 00:05:50,246
because if he sees you,
he makes you do grunt work.

121
00:05:50,583 --> 00:05:52,983
- You all right?
- What the French?

122
00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:56,814
Sorry, I was just hiding
from one of my teachers.

123
00:05:56,856 --> 00:05:58,551
It's a little game we play.

124
00:05:58,591 --> 00:05:59,717
- Really?
- No.

125
00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:03,354
- You can win at games.
- Got bad news for you, sweetheart.

126
00:06:03,396 --> 00:06:04,727
You lost.

127
00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:12,000
I need you to go ahead
and take Mr. Evans' chart here

128
00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:13,369
and make four copies.

129
00:06:13,406 --> 00:06:16,466
Drop one off at my office, one at my car,
one at the bar that I frequent,

130
00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:19,171
and then go bury one in the quad
and draw me up a map,

131
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,544
just in case I want to go
on a treasure hunt later on.

132
00:06:21,614 --> 00:06:23,343
Hmm, ten after. Goodness...

133
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:26,447
Darn it all. Now, if that ink runs,

134
00:06:26,486 --> 00:06:28,351
I'm gonna have to replace
the whole sign.

135
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:29,582
Weird.

136
00:06:30,456 --> 00:06:34,392
Broken ribs and a possible ruptured
spleen? Was Mr. Evans in an accident?

137
00:06:34,460 --> 00:06:37,156
Yes, he was in a train wreck
called his life.

138
00:06:37,196 --> 00:06:39,426
You see,
Alan Evans is a hard-core drunk,

139
00:06:39,465 --> 00:06:41,865
an alkie, a sauce monkey,
a hooch goblin,

140
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,563
a man who unwinds
at the end of every single day

141
00:06:44,604 --> 00:06:47,596
by treating himself to a delightful
garbage bag full of vodka.

142
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:50,200
- So, what are we going to do?
- We're going to get him out of here,

143
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:52,234
and then, hopefully,

144
00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:56,639
he's gonna die someplace else.
Like in a yard or somebody's shed.

145
00:07:01,621 --> 00:07:03,282
I love teaching.

146
00:07:03,656 --> 00:07:05,214
I'm a teacher.

147
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:09,956
Mr. Shershow here
is in a massive coma.

148
00:07:09,996 --> 00:07:13,295
And even though he can't register
any outside stimulus,

149
00:07:13,332 --> 00:07:16,358
I still want someone to read him
all seven Harry Potter books.

150
00:07:16,402 --> 00:07:19,064
Any volunteers? Cole, thank you.

151
00:07:19,105 --> 00:07:21,767
Sorry, no can do.
Got a dinner rezzie with my moms.

152
00:07:21,808 --> 00:07:25,005
A "rezzie"? You also gonna get
your drunk on and eat some 'za?

153
00:07:25,044 --> 00:07:29,811
No, I wish. My mom is lactose intolly.
For real though, she is the best.

154
00:07:30,149 --> 00:07:34,017
When we go out, she helps me
pick up girls. She's my wingmom.

155
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:38,917
Horrifying. Look, I don't know what
Orlando-based boy band rejected you,

156
00:07:39,158 --> 00:07:41,991
- but you'll do what I tell you.
- Yeah, I don't think so.

157
00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:46,021
See, that's me and my 'rents
at the hospital groundbreaking.

158
00:07:46,899 --> 00:07:48,799
- Wow.
- They're in the major donors' club.

159
00:07:48,835 --> 00:07:52,134
I got to cut the ribbon
with some big ole sizzies.

160
00:07:52,171 --> 00:07:55,334
Long story short,
I'm untouchable around here.

161
00:07:55,608 --> 00:07:57,599
To everyone except you.

162
00:07:59,445 --> 00:08:02,778
- Yeah. That just happened.
- Okay.

163
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:06,311
I know people like Alan.
I grew up with them.

164
00:08:06,352 --> 00:08:08,616
My Uncle Frank is always drunk.

165
00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:10,679
He fought the entire band
at my cousin's wedding.

166
00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:13,954
Okay, look. Alan's an addict,
so the first thing you need to do

167
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:15,460
is make sure he's ready for help.

168
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,656
I can't talk to him
about stuff that personal.

169
00:08:17,697 --> 00:08:21,292
I get embarrassed too easily.
I've never seen myself nude.

170
00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:24,895
I mean, I've been nude,
but I never look down.

171
00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:27,098
Weird for a doctor, but okay, fine.

172
00:08:27,139 --> 00:08:29,607
Look, Lucy, you have to find a way
to connect with him.

173
00:08:30,142 --> 00:08:31,439
I like your perfume.

174
00:08:31,477 --> 00:08:34,605
That's weird, because I've never
worn perfume in my entire life.

175
00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:37,115
Also, I've never seen myself naked.

176
00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:40,082
You know, that was part
of an earlier conversation.

177
00:08:40,119 --> 00:08:42,644
- Are you okay?
- I'm not great, Alan.

178
00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:46,383
Med school is tough. I don't sleep.

179
00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:49,819
I haven't eaten anything all week
except yogurt and wine.

180
00:08:49,862 --> 00:08:53,457
- Well, maybe you should take a...
- Alan, I'm not done.

181
00:08:53,633 --> 00:08:55,498
I can't believe
what Cole gets away with.

182
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:58,129
I'd like to fill a tube sock full of batteries
and just beat him a little.

183
00:08:58,170 --> 00:09:00,035
You know, send a message.

184
00:09:00,072 --> 00:09:01,767
- What?
- Denise, you're scary.

185
00:09:01,807 --> 00:09:03,138
I mean, sure, you seem cute at first,

186
00:09:03,175 --> 00:09:05,200
but then you eat after midnight
or get some water on you

187
00:09:05,244 --> 00:09:07,007
and then, boom,
you turn into this monster

188
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:09,105
and I gotta throw you
in the microwave and explode you.

189
00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:12,584
- What the hell are you talking about?
- I'm talking Gremlins, woman.

190
00:09:12,618 --> 00:09:14,279
You know, you should get
your boyfriend to watch that movie

191
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,083
and then maybe
he can understand you better.

192
00:09:16,122 --> 00:09:17,316
What boyfriend?

193
00:09:17,356 --> 00:09:19,119
Denise, everybody knows
Drew's hitting it.

194
00:09:19,158 --> 00:09:21,820
- How?
- You guys had sex near The Todd.

195
00:09:23,963 --> 00:09:27,524
- What? What's going on?
- Someone's doing it right now.

196
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:30,066
- In that supply closet.
- Really?

197
00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:34,367
Socks off, pants on? Still...

198
00:09:36,309 --> 00:09:37,640
Damn it.

199
00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:40,906
How come you don't let him
take his pants off, though?

200
00:09:42,615 --> 00:09:47,712
Man. That was a great cry.
I always feel fantastic after those.

201
00:09:48,287 --> 00:09:50,755
Hello, world, Lucy's back. Am I right?

202
00:09:50,790 --> 00:09:52,883
Well, you definitely gave me
something to work with.

203
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:56,827
Wow. I mean, my forehead's really big
and I look Chinese,

204
00:09:56,862 --> 00:09:59,456
- but that's really good.
- Thank you.

205
00:09:59,699 --> 00:10:00,996
I used to teach high-school art.

206
00:10:01,033 --> 00:10:02,830
Oh, my God, he's opening up.

207
00:10:02,868 --> 00:10:06,736
Oh, yeah. Yeah, I was married, too.
Before everything fell apart.

208
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:10,367
I'll tell you what, though, I definitely
don't want to live this way anymore.

209
00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:14,074
Maybe you don't have to.

210
00:10:15,982 --> 00:10:17,950
I thought you had dinner plans
with your wingmom.

211
00:10:17,984 --> 00:10:20,953
Yeah, she's at the bar
sizing up the local talent for me.

212
00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:25,651
No. God, I like more booty than that.
She should know that by now.

213
00:10:25,691 --> 00:10:27,955
- I know you feel me.
- Yeah, I do.

214
00:10:28,094 --> 00:10:30,494
Is a wingmom what I think it is?

215
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:39,127
Sing to me, Wingmom.
Sing me to my dreams.

216
00:10:40,439 --> 00:10:41,997
- Hello, all.
- Hey.

217
00:10:42,341 --> 00:10:45,276
"Hello, all." I hate that guy.

218
00:10:45,444 --> 00:10:47,935
- But you love that guy.
- Thank you.

219
00:10:47,980 --> 00:10:49,447
- What?
- I'm not surprised.

220
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:50,608
You're both dark weirdoes.

221
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,448
It's like if Fonzie
and Jo from The Facts of Life

222
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:54,544
fell in love with each other.

223
00:10:54,587 --> 00:10:56,748
- I'd watch the hell out of that show.
- Who wouldn't?

224
00:10:56,789 --> 00:11:00,247
I'm not looking for a relationship.
I like to be an island, okay?

225
00:11:00,292 --> 00:11:04,194
People can visit the island, but no one
gets to stay. Safer that way.

226
00:11:04,230 --> 00:11:08,189
Do you realize how empty that sounds?
What kind of life is that?

227
00:11:08,234 --> 00:11:10,862
You know, I'd watch a show
about Fonzie and a Gremlin, too.

228
00:11:10,903 --> 00:11:13,235
Fonzie couldn't take care of a Gremlin.
He's too busy being cool.

229
00:11:13,272 --> 00:11:15,706
- Can we stop talking about this?
- You know what you need?

230
00:11:15,741 --> 00:11:19,074
A water taxi to your island

231
00:11:19,111 --> 00:11:22,547
So he can get there
And you can kiss him

232
00:11:22,581 --> 00:11:25,880
Up on your island
All chillin' with turtles

233
00:11:25,918 --> 00:11:29,479
'Cause you're so private
And now falsetto

234
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,319
Yes, falsetto

235
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,052
Uh-oh, she's leaving

236
00:11:33,092 --> 00:11:34,684
Yo, let's keep going

237
00:11:34,727 --> 00:11:36,627
Now even higher

238
00:11:36,662 --> 00:11:38,527
Yes, even higher

239
00:11:39,165 --> 00:11:42,601
Look, Alan wants to change,
so I found him a rehab facility.

240
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:45,695
I just need a doctor to sign off.
Are you in?

241
00:11:46,839 --> 00:11:49,706
And that was the beginning
of a long line of "no's."

242
00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:54,172
I asked all the doctors in the hospital
and they all shot me down.

243
00:11:57,950 --> 00:11:59,577
Naive-five.

244
00:12:01,821 --> 00:12:04,051
Someone please wake me
from this nightmare.

245
00:12:04,090 --> 00:12:06,285
Because in my fever dream,

246
00:12:06,325 --> 00:12:08,555
I see a med student getting involved
with a patient

247
00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:11,961
who I expressly told her to ignore
mere hours ago.

248
00:12:11,997 --> 00:12:15,524
I cannot tell you how much I hate
to reiterate something,

249
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:18,298
especially when I have already
iterated it.

250
00:12:18,337 --> 00:12:20,168
You're going to have to
excuse me now,

251
00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:22,674
because I must gather my fury.

252
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:26,204
It's scary
to put yourself out there.

253
00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:27,711
- Hey.
- Hey.

254
00:12:29,115 --> 00:12:31,845
I am having a crapfest of a day today.

255
00:12:33,152 --> 00:12:36,747
You want to hang out later?
You know, maybe grab a beer?

256
00:12:37,356 --> 00:12:39,221
- Grab a beer?
- Yeah.

257
00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:43,387
- Is that some kind of euphemism?
- Nope, it just means grab a beer.

258
00:12:44,063 --> 00:12:46,497
- Maybe talk a little.
- Oh!

259
00:12:47,733 --> 00:12:51,169
Um... I'm sorry, Denise,

260
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,903
I'm just not looking for that.

261
00:12:55,908 --> 00:12:57,500
- See you later.
- Mmm-hmm.

262
00:12:58,978 --> 00:13:01,310
Dr. Cox, while you're fury-gathering,

263
00:13:01,347 --> 00:13:03,907
let me just say
that if Alan goes to rehab...

264
00:13:03,949 --> 00:13:05,644
He will do nothing

265
00:13:05,684 --> 00:13:08,812
except figure out how to steal enough
paper-cup shooters of mouthwash

266
00:13:08,854 --> 00:13:10,879
to get one last desperate buzz on.

267
00:13:10,923 --> 00:13:13,357
His job is to leave here and die.

268
00:13:13,392 --> 00:13:17,260
Your job is to listen
to every word I say at all times,

269
00:13:17,296 --> 00:13:20,197
and here's the hard part,
actually do those things.

270
00:13:20,232 --> 00:13:23,201
So in the future
when I tell you to do nothing,

271
00:13:23,235 --> 00:13:24,497
I mean nothing.

272
00:13:24,537 --> 00:13:27,529
And in case that is still not clear...

273
00:13:30,242 --> 00:13:37,148
Nothing.

274
00:13:49,461 --> 00:13:52,021
I thought being a doctor
was about helping people.

275
00:13:52,064 --> 00:13:55,033
It is, Lucy. Well, that and showing up
my third-grade teacher

276
00:13:55,067 --> 00:13:58,628
who said I'd never amount to anything.
Eat it, Mrs. Nickerson.

277
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,298
And rest in peace.

278
00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:01,966
All right, I didn't want to play hardball,

279
00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:04,601
but if you don't try to change
Dr. Cox's mind about Alan,

280
00:14:04,643 --> 00:14:07,407
I will never call you Dr. D ever again.

281
00:14:07,446 --> 00:14:10,176
- Even in the quad?
- Especially in the quad.

282
00:14:10,216 --> 00:14:11,945
I'll go talk to Dr. Cox right now.

283
00:14:14,386 --> 00:14:16,217
Dr. Cox said he'll sign the paper

284
00:14:16,255 --> 00:14:19,019
if you can raise the money
to send Alan to a rehab center.

285
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:22,323
- Dr. D, you rock.
- And sometimes I roll.

286
00:14:26,232 --> 00:14:28,291
You two clowns convinced me
to put myself out there

287
00:14:28,334 --> 00:14:29,562
and Drew shot me down.

288
00:14:29,602 --> 00:14:31,331
Why'd you have to go
mess up my little island?

289
00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:32,667
Why'd you push me towards Drew?

290
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:35,003
- He just seems like a nice guy.
- Based on what?

291
00:14:35,841 --> 00:14:39,470
- Want the rest of my nachos?
- Oh, hell, yeah!

292
00:14:40,179 --> 00:14:42,079
You like him
'cause he shared old bar food?

293
00:14:42,114 --> 00:14:44,241
Turk and I met over a blooming onion.

294
00:14:44,283 --> 00:14:46,683
I like to think of it as a metaphor
for our relationship,

295
00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:49,483
because it's delicious,
but not really so healthy.

296
00:14:49,521 --> 00:14:51,716
I will hurt you, little man.

297
00:14:52,658 --> 00:14:54,182
She's like a Gremlin.

298
00:14:59,131 --> 00:15:00,462
You all right, little lady?

299
00:15:00,499 --> 00:15:02,364
I'm just trying to raise money
for a patient,

300
00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:03,993
but it's not going so great.

301
00:15:04,036 --> 00:15:06,800
You know, back in the day,
when I did security for Bell Biv DeVoe...

302
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,238
- Hey, boss.
- Shut up.

303
00:15:08,274 --> 00:15:09,332
Copy that.

304
00:15:09,375 --> 00:15:12,173
Anyway, they did their charity car wash
a little differently.

305
00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:20,613
Come on, Lucy.
I won the McAllister Prize in biology.

306
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:24,783
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're all real smart.
Now it's time to get wet.

307
00:15:26,325 --> 00:15:29,317
- Wow. Where do I get in line?
- Where's your car?

308
00:15:29,361 --> 00:15:33,991
What car? Full-body-wax-five.
Buff away, ladies.

309
00:15:39,004 --> 00:15:40,335
You know, I don't mean to sound
too forward,

310
00:15:40,372 --> 00:15:41,566
but there's someone at the hospital

311
00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:43,370
- who's really digging you.
- Are you hitting on me?

312
00:15:43,409 --> 00:15:45,639
Because I already went through
my bald, black dude phase.

313
00:15:45,678 --> 00:15:47,236
Seriously, I did.

314
00:15:47,279 --> 00:15:48,610
I'm talking about you and Denise.

315
00:15:48,647 --> 00:15:50,342
Why are you talking about
me and Denise?

316
00:15:50,382 --> 00:15:52,850
Because of the other night
when we shared the nachos.

317
00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:54,910
Dude, we're nach-bros. Come on.

318
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:57,787
And that's a special bond,
one which I cherish.

319
00:15:57,823 --> 00:15:59,586
I just think you should go for yours.

320
00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:00,990
Go for yours

321
00:16:01,026 --> 00:16:03,119
You don't know me.
I spent the last year

322
00:16:03,162 --> 00:16:04,993
in the Alaskan wilderness
living in a yurt.

323
00:16:05,030 --> 00:16:06,759
The only human contact I had

324
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:09,563
was an Eskimo boy who sold me
salmon jerky and painkillers.

325
00:16:09,601 --> 00:16:10,625
And do you know why?

326
00:16:10,669 --> 00:16:12,500
Because when I flunked out
of med school before,

327
00:16:12,538 --> 00:16:14,233
I consequently torched
every relationship

328
00:16:14,273 --> 00:16:17,538
that meant anything to me.
I'm not taking that chance again.

329
00:16:17,576 --> 00:16:19,134
What's a yurt?

330
00:16:19,178 --> 00:16:23,308
You know, son,
I was married to my Enid for 44 years.

331
00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:24,441
And now she's gone.

332
00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:29,614
And the only reason I teach is so
I don't have to be alone in my house.

333
00:16:30,689 --> 00:16:33,317
You can't wall yourself off
from other people.

334
00:16:33,359 --> 00:16:37,159
- You won't make it.
- That's some truth being dropped there.

335
00:16:37,363 --> 00:16:40,389
Great. So how about you two clear out?

336
00:16:40,432 --> 00:16:44,596
Cindy here's three martinis in,
and I'm about to land that marlin.

337
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,663
- Uh...
- Oh!

338
00:16:48,707 --> 00:16:51,039
Damn, she was good to go.

339
00:16:52,444 --> 00:16:54,810
Remember, Alan, you can do it.

340
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:57,672
Can't thank you enough.

341
00:17:04,223 --> 00:17:06,953
I knew
I'd just changed Alan's life,

342
00:17:06,992 --> 00:17:09,654
but I wasn't gonna make a big deal
out of it.

343
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:13,529
Lifetime presents
Antonio Sabato Jr. As Alan the drunk.

344
00:17:13,732 --> 00:17:16,701
- A man this broken...
- I'm just really broken.

345
00:17:16,735 --> 00:17:20,603
...needs a woman this strong...
- You can do this, Alan.

346
00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:28,703
...with a mentor who cares so much.
- God, I care so much.

347
00:17:29,415 --> 00:17:31,383
I guess this is goodbye.

348
00:17:32,351 --> 00:17:34,444
No, we can't.

349
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:38,622
- I know you're a doctor.
- I'm a med student, damn it.

350
00:17:38,657 --> 00:17:41,353
- Lucy...
- Shh.

351
00:17:58,777 --> 00:18:03,271
Antonio Sabato Jr.,
my safely ethnic dreamboat.

352
00:18:03,816 --> 00:18:07,115
Over the next few days, I stayed proud
of myself for helping Alan.

353
00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:10,417
And I wasn't naive,
I knew he had a long road ahead,

354
00:18:10,456 --> 00:18:12,617
but maybe, just maybe...

355
00:18:12,691 --> 00:18:15,285
Having someone believe in him
was all he needed.

356
00:18:15,327 --> 00:18:17,454
Have I got something to show you.

357
00:18:20,232 --> 00:18:22,393
Honestly, I can't think of anything

358
00:18:22,434 --> 00:18:25,062
that could make this moment
more delicious.

359
00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,901
- Alan?
- Who are you?

360
00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:31,273
More delicious. I love when movies end
the way you hope they will.

361
00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:34,245
- You saw this coming?
- Everyone saw this coming.

362
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:36,213
- Not Dr. D.
- Really?

363
00:18:36,248 --> 00:18:37,545
Would you like to know the deal

364
00:18:37,583 --> 00:18:40,245
your precious Dr. D made with me
in my office?

365
00:18:41,086 --> 00:18:42,678
If I agree to do this,

366
00:18:42,721 --> 00:18:44,279
you have to promise
that I'll get to be there

367
00:18:44,323 --> 00:18:47,417
to witness the devastation
wash over her hopeful face.

368
00:18:47,459 --> 00:18:49,723
- I'll do what I can.
- Then I'm in.

369
00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:53,526
He even bet me a triple C-note
that Alan here wouldn't make it a week.

370
00:18:53,565 --> 00:18:55,123
- I don't believe you.
- Hey, Big Per,

371
00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:56,759
I want my winnings in all fives.

372
00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:59,293
Or my own "Number One" sign.
Your call.

373
00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:12,283
- Hey.
- How could you do that to me?

374
00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:17,585
I know you can't see it right now,
but this is good for you.

375
00:19:17,623 --> 00:19:20,387
Yeah, as good
as my mom's fish biscuits.

376
00:19:21,126 --> 00:19:22,559
- They're bad.
- Ah.

377
00:19:23,629 --> 00:19:25,790
Look, Lucy, at some point,

378
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:28,925
every doctor needs to learn
about lost causes like Alan.

379
00:19:28,967 --> 00:19:32,266
I just thought
I'd come along for the ride with you.

380
00:19:32,304 --> 00:19:34,499
- Why?
- Because when it happened to me,

381
00:19:34,540 --> 00:19:37,907
there was no one around
to talk to me about it after.

382
00:19:37,943 --> 00:19:40,241
If you're gonna survive as a doctor,

383
00:19:40,279 --> 00:19:43,146
you have to stop trying
to change things you can't change.

384
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:46,618
So, I'm supposed to never try and help
anybody like Alan?

385
00:19:46,652 --> 00:19:49,553
No, because if you're gonna survive
as a person,

386
00:19:49,588 --> 00:19:53,046
you can never stop trying
to change things you can't change.

387
00:19:53,091 --> 00:19:56,026
- My head hurts.
- Get used to it.

388
00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:59,793
I just wanted Alan to end up okay.

389
00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:02,361
You're doing good.

390
00:20:06,772 --> 00:20:09,468
I think what Dr. Dorian
was saying,

391
00:20:09,508 --> 00:20:11,408
although it's never that clear with him,

392
00:20:11,643 --> 00:20:14,635
is that you have to keep
putting yourself out there

393
00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:17,444
and just hope
that you get something back.

394
00:20:17,482 --> 00:20:18,949
Hey, Stick.

395
00:20:19,851 --> 00:20:22,251
- What's your last name?
- Mahoney.

396
00:20:23,355 --> 00:20:24,822
I like that.

397
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:27,317
So, you still want
to grab that beer and talk?

398
00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:28,792
Not really.

399
00:20:29,928 --> 00:20:31,725
- But I will.
- Great.

400
00:20:33,365 --> 00:20:35,196
I got you something.

401
00:20:36,468 --> 00:20:39,528
- Is that Cole's mom?
- Yeah. I introduced them.

402
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:43,898
- You're gonna hit that, aren't you?
- Like a big rig with no brakes.

403
00:20:43,942 --> 00:20:46,342
- Wow, that was disgusting.
- Yeah.

404
00:20:46,645 --> 00:20:49,239
- Let's get out of here, huh?
- Yeah, I could use a drink.

405
00:20:49,281 --> 00:20:51,909
- I don't really drink anymore.
- That's cool, you can drive.

406
00:20:51,950 --> 00:20:55,078
- Don't really drive, either.
- You're weird. I like that.

407
00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:59,116
Here's to a giant mistake.

408
00:21:00,892 --> 00:21:03,360
Oh, snap, we called it

409
00:21:03,395 --> 00:21:04,919
He's on her island

410
00:21:04,963 --> 00:21:08,160
Where they make babies
Under the palm trees

411
00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:09,758
Yo, let's go lower

412
00:21:09,801 --> 00:21:12,736
I can't go lower
Let's just be robots

413
00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:14,602
- Beep-beep-beep-beep-beep...
- Guys, come on.

414
00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:16,073
Don't interrupt us

415
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:19,043
Here comes her boyfriend
He don't look happy

416
00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:22,012
It's okay, guys, I like your singing

417
00:21:22,047 --> 00:21:23,605
We'll be a trio

418
00:21:23,649 --> 00:21:25,640
And tour the country

419
00:21:26,305 --> 00:22:26,201
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