- [kids] Aye, aye, Captain! - Are ya ready, kids?
- [shouting] Aye, aye, Captain! - I can't hear you!
♪ Oh... ♪
♪ Who lives in a pineapple Under the sea? ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ Absorbent and yellow And porous is he ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
Be something you wish ♪ ♪ If nautical nonsense
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ Then drop on the deck And flop like a fish ♪
- ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants - Ready?
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
[Captain laughs]
[plays airy tune]
[sniffs] Ah.
stroll deep in Jellyfish fields. Nothing quite like a relaxing
[shrieking]
I'd know that sound anywhere!
It's a terrifying shriek!
But where's it coming from?
[shrieks]
what is with all the shrieking? Patrick,
You know I walk here on Tuesdays.
Sorry, SpongeBob. That wasn't me.
Patrick, I know I heard a terrifying shriek.
but I was just mimicking it. So did I, SpongeBob,
Patrick, please don't do that. So you were mimicking it?
- It is really... - [shrieking]
Wait a minute, if the shriek wasn't coming from you,
where was it...?
Behind that kelp shrub. It's over there.
[shrieking]
must've come from this clam. The terrifying shriek
[sputtering]
there's something wrong with... Hey, Patrick. I think
[coughs]
[wheezes]
What are we gonna do?
I remember coughing like that, Well, the last time
eating a box of kelp jerky. I was sitting at home
got some stuck in your throat? You were coughing because you
I got the TV remote stuck in my throat.
Patrick, this clam is choking!
Luckily I come prepared. There, there, Clammy.
What are you doing?
- They like this. - No.
You always give a choking victim the "slime-lick" maneuver first.
And if that doesn't work, you walk away
you never saw them before. and pretend like
Like this. Ready, clam?
[straining] Ooh!
Well, SpongeBob, I think I might go catch a movie.
- Hey, what about the clam? - What clam?
I've never seen that clam before.
But...
Patrick, the clam had a baby. [gasps]
That's not a baby, SpongeBob.
- Then what could it be? - I'll give you a hint.
What's white and round and comes out of clams?
Their... eyes?
- No, silly. A volleyball! - A baby volleyball!
I got it! Oof!
- Good idea coming here, Patrick. - That's my specialty.
- Nope. Being called Patrick. - Having good ideas?
some stretches first. Maybe we should do
- Well, that's my specialty. - Good idea!
Having good ideas?
Doing some stretches first. Nope.
The thing's 100 years old. Yeah. No. I dunno.
How should I know? All right. Look, if you don't wanna...
Uh-huh. Yeah. Well, I...
Yeah, yeah. I'm still here.
138, 139.
- Gentlemen. - Hello.
what a lovely ball that is. I couldn't help noticing
Oh. Really?
to get a closer look. Yes, I'd sure like
- We don't mind, do we, Patrick? - Just don't take too long.
start playing with it. We were just about to
Oh, it won't take long at all.
It's heavier than I imagined. Ooh!
Where'd you find it? And shiner, too.
deep in Jellyfish Fields. We found it
Really? What was it doing there?
- Well... [clears throat] - Choking a clam.
What would you say if I were to offer you a small fortune
in exchange for your shiny ball?
What do you mean, small fortune?
you think there'll be, Patrick? Whoa. How many more trucks do
getting kinda hungry, though. Huh? Oh, I dunno. I am
I'll catch up with you later, SpongeBob.
That looked like the last of 'em.
- The last of what? - Oh, hey, Patrick.
So, did you figure out what you're gonna do
with this fat stack of cabbage yet?
Yep! I mean... nope.
Well, my dad always told me, "When you have money,
you need to do more than spend it.
You need to have a plan."
Wow, your dad really told you that?
What he said was,
"How many times do I have to tell you not to stand there?"
- But I knew what he meant. - Hey, Patrick.
when you don't know what to buy. I know where to go
- The mall! - You do?
- Yeah! - Whoo!
[both] Touchdown!
[both] Awwww!
Patrick? Where'd you go?
- Oh. There you are. - [both laugh]
the best shopping day ever. Patrick, that was
- You can say that again. - Best shopping day ever.
- Patrick, I've got an idea. - Really?
and this time... buy stuff! Let's go shopping again
Oh! Wasn't that incredible, Patrick?
With all this money,
we could've bought anything in the whole world.
- So, tell me, what'd you buy? - Yep.
A life-time supply of strawberry gum.
Hey, me too!
And to think, we barely even put a dent in my fortune.
Two, please. One for me and one for my best friend, Patrick.
I didn't really ask who they're for.
Thanks. There you go.
It was only 59 cents for the ice cream.
Oh, that's OK.
I kinda have more money
than I know what to do with right now.
Looks like my ex-wife was wrong.
I am in the right line of work.
Triple goo berry sundae, please.
- Sure. That's gonna be 2.98. - Extra nuts.
Ugh. Hey, Bert, you got, like, eight cents I can borrow?
No, I don't, Bill. Sorry. Let me check.
why is it I always have money You know,
when you need to borrow it?
I dunno what to say.
Are you gentlemen low on funds?
Let me help. Here you go.
I just need eight cents. Whoa. That's OK.
got my ice cream. See? That's OK. I already
- OK, uh... Thanks! - Sure thing.
- Do you need some too, Bert? - OK!
- You wanna buy some ice cream? - Could I have some too?
No, I'm allergic.
But... I'll be your best friend.
It's a deal.
with this guy for a while. I think I could hang out
Me too.
Me three.
Ice cream?
Mmm. Yes?
Uh... I'm here to see SpongeBob.
And are you on the guest list, sir?
Well, I don't think so. Normally, I...
let you in, sir. Good day, sir. Then I'm afraid I can't
Good day.
Your shoe's untied.
Oh. Why so it is.
[sniffs]
Thank you, sir.
And so he was like, "Do you wanna buy some ice cream?"
Ice cream! Can you imagine?
[chuckles] I love that story.
Have you seen SpongeBob around? Hey, guys.
Is that guy talking to us?
Just don't move or breathe. He might go away.
SpongeBob? SpongeBob!
I could buy and sell you. Hey, pal, watch it.
And I said, "Go ahead. Let's do it right now.
I got too much hair anyways."
[laughter]
SpongeBob. SpongeBob!
Don't wear it out. That's my name.
[laughter]
I gotta tell ya something SpongeBob,
I think you should know.
Your house is full of strangers!
These aren't strangers. Oh, Patrick.
of my closest friends. These are 497
- Right, everybody? - [all] Yeah!
- That's right! - [all] Yeah!
[all cheering]
Patrick, do you hear that?
That is the sound of love.
SpongeBob, if you keep throwing your money away like that,
you won't have any left.
- Excuse me, sir. - And then--
Is this man giving you trouble?
- Like I was saying... - SpongeBob!
- We don't want any trouble. - But...
Now just keep moving.
Dude, how did you get in there?
And I told him, it's not that I mind the macaroni.
- Sorry about that, SpongeBob. - What I mind is...
- Won't happen again. - No matter.
my glamorous new lifestyle. He's simply jealous of
Can I have some money? Say, that reminds me.
I always remember to... Why, certainly.
[all gasp]
I keep it in this other pocket. I forgot.
[all gasp]
Uh, will you please excuse me for a moment?
[gasps]
[groans]
[screams and sobs]
Well, everyone.
put a damper on things, I hope this doesn't
but I just checked and...
all my money is... gone. Well, it's just that
for work tomorrow, boy. Don't be late
- Oh. Hey, SpongeBob. - Hey, Patrick.
Whatcha doing?
Oh, the same thing us sea stars are usually doing, I guess.
Laying up against a rock.
- Patrick, I was wrong. - About what?
those people being my friends. The money and about
There is no right or wrong
when it comes to that stuff, SpongeBob.
There just either is or there isn't.
if having a bunch of money Patrick,
you're my best friend, makes me forget that
then I don't want any more money ever again.
Well, why didn't you say so, buddy?
someone to go break in I've been waiting for
my new volleyball with!
You got another new volleyball?
Yep. I found it.
Found it? Where?
Inside the Bikini Bottom Diamond Mine!
[inhales]
♪ Fi-garo ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Fi-ga-ro ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Figaro-Figaro-Figaro Figaro-Figaro ♪
♪ Fi-ga-rooooh ♪
[coughs]
[groans]
Don't feel bad. He didn't use me yesterday either.
♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪
make a strong first impression I am anxious to look good and
as I share my singing skills
Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus. with the famed
♪ La-la-la-laaaa ♪
But I needn't be too anxious,
this master's voice, for once they hear
they'll give me the lead solo for sure.
♪ Figaro ♪
Huh?
Well, it looks like a forlorn SpongeBob
lying sprawled across the dirt.
[inhales]
[sighs]
Obviously depressed.
Oh, what a lovely day. For me. [chuckles]
Huh?
Squidward, my playmate Patrick is away at a family reunion.
Sad and alone.
I'm desperate for something to do and someone to play with.
[coughs]
Well, I've got no time for the likes of you.
Squidward, where are you going all dressed up?
None of your business.
- And no, you can't. - Can I come?
Are you going to a fancy store?
- A fancy par-tay? - No.
- A hot fancy-pants date? - No.
- Can I come? Can I come? - No.
Can I come? Can I come? Can I come?
no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no,
Does that answer your questions?
All except for that last one.
No, you can't!
[breathing heavily]
If you must know, I am going to be a featured soloist
concert performance for an impending
Bikini Bottom Men's Choir. with the famed
I'm hitting the big time, not playtime.
Now if you'll excuse me...
Wow!
and your buddies, Squidward, I may not be as good as you
in my heart that I wanna share. but I too have a song
[clearing throat]
[forcing throat]
[coughs and wheezes]
♪ La ♪
[coughs and wheezes]
Au revoir, SpongeBob!
See you in the nosebleed seats.
Har-har-har-har!
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
- ♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
- ♪ Yodelay-hee-hoo ♪ - Huh?
the Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus. I'm good enough to join
- I promise! - Yuck!
Perhaps Squidward didn't see me.
♪ Figaro ♪
[clears throat]
♪ Figaro ♪
ought to get his attention. This giant pothole
♪ Fi-gar-oooooooh ♪
the wrong note back there. Ugh! I think I hit
What the...?
Now I have a captive audience. What a lucky break!
- [clears throat] - [screams]
♪ Laaaa ♪
[screams]
♪ Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi Mi-mi-miiii ♪
[clears throat]
[wails]
could you keep it down, please? Squidward,
I'm trying to find my starting pitch here.
- [screams] - ♪ Ah ♪
If that rank amateur SpongeBob embarrasses me
in front of the Bikini Bottom Choir men, my life is ruined!
[gasps] I'm almost late for choir practice.
SpongeBob again or I'm doomed! I'd better not run into
[chuckles]
♪ Figaro, Figaro, Figaro Figaro ♪
Stop! Stop. Stop. Stop.
[screams]
I hereby issue you this ticket for reckless frowning
listen to my song. and failing to
What are you, some kinda...?
I'm a singing traffic cop. That's right.
A singing traffic--
♪ O, sole mioooo ♪
I will be late to practice SpongeBob,
with all of your tomfoolery slowing me down.
It is a high honor to be chosen
for the Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus.
And you are not going to keep me from performing my grand solo.
[inhales]
♪ Figaro, Figaro, Figaro Figaro ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Fi-ga-roooo... ♪
[voice echoing]
♪ Ohhhh... ♪
Just in time.
Gentlemen.
[all vocalizing scales]
[clears throat]
[continues clearing throat]
[sputtering and grumbling]
[inhales]
[all vocalizing scales]
[off-pitch] ♪ Laaaaaaaaaaaaaah ♪
[piano stops]
[in tune] ♪ Laaaaaaaaaaaaaah ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
- It's so beautiful! - ♪ Fi-ga-rooooh ♪
♪ Ohhhh ♪
♪ Ahhhh... ♪
the most wonderful singing [sniffles] That's
I've ever heard.
[sobs]
♪ Ahhhh ♪
[all cheering]
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Oh!
[cheering and applause]
- Hear, hear. - Bravo.
Oh, Master SquarePants.
We would be honored if you would take the open chair
as our featured soloist!
[chuckles] Well...
Mmm. Hmm. Ah. Mmm.
We would also be honored if you would wear this.
[gasps] A moustache? For me?
Well, don't be shy. Put it on. Well?
Squidward, look.
choir man's moustache. My very own
[groans]
Well, will you do it?
[groaning]
I'll do it!
But only if you find a spot
and great friend, Squidward. for my inspiration
Deal!
♪ Figarooooh ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
- [cheering and applause] - ♪ Fi-ga-rooooh ♪