- Are you ready, kids? - [kids] Aye, aye, Captain.
I can't hear you.
Aye, aye, Captain!
Oh...
♪ Who lives in a pineapple Under the sea? ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ Absorbent and yellow And porous is he ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ If nautical nonsense Be something you wish ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ Then drop on the deck And flop like a fish ♪
- ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪ - Ready?
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
[captain laughs heartily]
[piccolo playing]
[Mr. Krabs] 451, 452, 453,
454, 455,
456... Ow!
[groans forcefully]
[whimpers]
Oh... I split me nail.
Oh, that looks terrible.
Hello? Guinevere, it's an emergency.
No, I haven't been biting them.
No. Can you just schedule me in?
Now? A manicure in the middle of the day?
But what if the guys see me?
Yes, I want my nails to look their best.
I'll be right there.
[rapid footsteps]
[sonar beeps]
[snoring]
- Whoa! - Ahoy, sir. Where are you going?
Uh... [chuckles]
It's, uh... It's a secret.
[gasps] You have a secret?
Everybody's got a secret. And mine's going to take 15 minutes.
Maybe 20 if she can spruce up me cuticles.
Aye-aye, sir.
And who will be in charge while you're gone?
Eh...
- [snoring] - Well, not Squidward.
Don't know him. Too lumpy.
[heavenly music plays]
OK, OK. You're in charge.
What?
You're in charge. For the next 15 minutes.
- I'm in charge? - Yeah. Sure. Why not?
[hums anxiously]
You OK, boy?
[whines]
[shouts happily]
[triumphant music plays]
I won't let you down, sir.
Ah, sheesh. I'll be back in 15 minutes.
[snoring]
[clears throat]
- [gasps] Oh, what the... - Nap time's over, Squidward.
Now, what do you say we work real hard
until Mr. Krabs comes back, hmm?
Krabs is gone?
Yup. And I'm in charge for the next 15 minutes.
- Wow. - [giggles]
Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal around here.
I guess that's why Krabs put me in... charge.
Charge.
♪ Charge ♪
Wake me up when I care.
- Do you care now? - No.
[gasps, chuckles] Everything is under control, people.
Go back to your Krabby Patties.
Nothing a temporary man in charge can't handle.
- Squidward? - [snores, murmurs]
- Squidward. - [mutters]
Squidward. Squidward.
Squid. Squid.
- Squidward. Squid. - What?!
Well, it's just that I'm in charge and...
[growls]
And you interrupted my regularly scheduled Krusty Krab nap?
Regularly scheduled nap?
This must be important.
Mr. Krabs has never interrupted one of these before.
- Really? - But being as you're
the "man in charge," you must have your reasons.
- Well, I... um... - What is it?
Um... Nothing. Carry on.
Boy, there sure is a lot of procedural-type stuff
I don't know about the Krusty Krab.
Ha!
- [bell dings] - Order up, Squidward!
You know, I'll let you serve this one. My stories are on.
Gosh, I'd love to, but I've got to cook the patties.
- So, do it when you're done. - And unclog the sink.
Hmm. Would you like to hear a secret?
- What kind of secret? - See that guy over there?
Yes.
He wants to be a fry cook and you're his hero.
Me?
Why don't you give him a couple of pointers?
Let him cook his own patty.
And don't take no for an answer. He's shy.
[laughs] This'll be good.
Hey, buddy. Yeah, it's me. SpongeBob.
- Fry cook extraordinaire. - Uh, hello.
I know your secret.
What? Who told you?
Oh, a little cashier told me. Follow me.
- Yeah, whatever you say, man. - Moron.
Bet you didn't think you'd be in here today, did you?
- No. - First off, this is my grill.
This is where the magic happens.
And this is my actual spatula. So start frying up some patties.
I'll check on you later, my little prodigy.
[laughs] SpongeBob will believe anything.
[laughs]
Order number 12!
- SpongeBob! What are you doing? - Taking out an order.
You're serving Krabby Patties with your hands?
Do you know how filthy your hands are?
[gasps] They are?
But your feet, however, are nice and clean.
Think about it.
They've been protected by your shoes and socks all day.
Oh.
It's all clear to me now.
One Krabby Meal served with extra-sanitary foot service.
Your hot, steaming, juicy Krabby Patty
and a large drink.
Enjoy.
Hey, is my food here yet?
Here, you can have mine.
[snores]
- Delivery. - What?
Here's the supplies you ordered.
- Ow. - Sign here.
- Hey. My pen. - Oops. Sorry.
[exclaims]
♪ It's here, it's here It's here, it's here ♪
[vocalizes] ♪ It's here ♪
SpongeBob, what is all this junk?
Now that I'm "in charge,"
I've decided to redecorate the Krusty Krab.
I'm going to make it all pretty.
Yeah, have fun with that.
Oh, Squidward!
- I'm in charge... - [grunts]
...so you'll be having all the fun.
- Doing what? - Painting, buffing,
sewing, washing windows, varnishing,
washing the toilets... oh, you lucky dog!
[growls]
Hey, SpongeBob, do you want to hear another Krusty Krab secret?
Huh?! Another Krusty Krab secret?
Yup. Do you want to know how Mr. Krabs gets all these customers?
Yes.
- Low expectations. - What's that?
He keeps the place a dump
so the food seems even better by comparison.
So, if you want to impress Mr. Krabs, you make it more filthy.
"More filthy"?
Throw trash on the floors, break furniture,
and never clean anything.
Sounds like the Chum Bucket.
Ah, but you'll be doing it on purpose.
Oh!
- How's this, Squidward? - Looking good.
- [slurps] - You mean, looking bad!
Enjoy our fine decor.
Next time, I'm picking the restaurant.
One Krusty Krab, covered in mud and slime.
[slurps] You missed a spot.
Oh.
Got it!
Gum under all tables.
How's that for low expectations?
Lower.
Initiating stage two. Collateral damage.
- How is that? - Perfect.
- This place is disgusting. - Yeah, let's get out of here,
just as soon as I finish this delicious Krabby Patty.
[customers chatter angrily]
Squidward, all the customers are leaving.
- What did we talk about? - Don't touch the material.
If you want the customers to stay,
you need to provide some entertainment.
Oh, can-do, Squidward! Can-do!
- Come on, let's go. - Wait!
You don't want to miss this.
[grunts]
- What's he doing? - He's dancing!
OK, people, just back away slowly.
[sighs] There's nothing like polished pincers
to make you feel like a man.
[cackles]
Let's see how SpongeBob's doing as acting manager.
What the...? SpongeBob dancing like a goofball?
And a hey! And a ho! And a hey and a ho!
And a hey, ho, how-ho, he-ho, ha, ho!
Me customers cowering in fear?
Help us.
[gasps] The Krusty Krab a filthy mess?!
Order number 20 ready for pickup.
And some stranger cooking Krabby Patties?!
[snores] Squidward sleeping on the job!
OK, that's actually normal.
SpongeBob! What have you done to me Krusty Krab?!
I was just following Squidward's advice, Mr. Krabs.
He told me all your secrets.
All me secrets?
[chuckles]
So is there anything else I can do for you,
Acting Manager SpongeBob?
Ah! Guinevere!
[snores]
- [phone rings] - [screams]
[sighs]
- Hello. - Hey, SpongeBob, how's it going?
Oh, hiya, Sandy.
Hey, I was wondering if you could come by tonight.
Sure. What's up?
I whipped up a new invention that I'm gonna unveil tonight,
and I need you to be my test subject.
I will be there.
You're not gonna forget, are ya?
Of course not. Have I ever let you down before?
- Hello? - Just be here!
With Gary as my witness,
I will not let you down, Miss Cheeks.
I won't let Sandy down.
How the barnacles do you put this thing together?
I won't let Sandy down. Morning, Captain.
I won't let Sandy down.
I won't let Sandy down, down. I won't let Sandy down.
Right after work, I'm going straight over to Sandy's.
- Boy! - Yes, sir?
I've got a special assignment for ya.
This is a build-it-yourself telescope.
The only problem is I can't figure out
how to put the darn thing together.
That's where you come in.
"Telescope assembly manual."
Now read this and be prepared
to put this thing together at my house tonight.
Tonight?
That's not gonna be a problem, is it?
- Um, well, actually... - Excellent!
Because I was looking at your annual employee report card
and the "Does a Laborious Task for Supervisor" box
has not been checked.
- [gasps] - See ya tonight.
Oh, what am I gonna do?
You can do it!
You made the commitments, you have to honor them.
Both of them.
[Patrick] Who you talking to, buddy?
[gasps]
Oh, hiya, Patrick. What are you doing back here?
Well, sorry to disturb you during work hours,
but I just wanted to remind you about my birthday.
No need to remind me.
I wouldn't forget my best buddy's birthday.
Then why aren't you saying the words?
What words?
Happy birthday.
It's today! My birthday's today!
And you surely must remember what you're supposed
to bring to my birthday, right?
Uh... My birthday cake!
You're supposed to bring my cake!
- Tonight? - Yes, tonight!
When else am I gonna celebrate it?!
At least I had the courtesy to start my party
after my best friend got off work.
See ya tonight... buddy.
Oh, Neptune! This is worse than I ever could have imagined!
[whistle blows]
Right! Time to be all I can be!
[all chatting]
Man, these people sure look sciencey.
Sandy must be pulling out all the stops for this one.
- Hey, Sandy, whatcha doing? - Oh, hey, SpongeBob.
Putting the finishing touches on my new invention.
Thanks for assisting me. You're such a big help.
No wonder Mr. Krabs relies on you so heavily.
I gotta help Mr. Krabs!
Hey, uh, Sandy, I gotta run to the, uh, gent's room.
Now, if I finish up with Mr. Krabs,
that'll free me up to assist Sandy.
[knocking]
SpongeBob! I knew I wouldn't have to fire ya.
You can rely on me, sir.
I wouldn't want to jeopardize my employee record.
[laughs nervously]
OK, let's see what we got here.
Oh, it says here on page 472, section C-17,
that you need a right-angled motorized hex drill.
Really? Why don't you head into town
and pick up one of those hex-drill dealies?
- I... - Or you can sit there
and watch me fill out your employee report card.
[pants]
Huh?
"Please call again."
Barnacles! Where can I find a motorized hex drill now?
- Just finishing up here. - Sandy!
Uh, oh, hey, Patrick. What are you doing in town?
I was just buying some birthday hats for my birthday party.
You didn't forget my party, did you?
Forget? How can I forget my best buddy's birthday party, huh?
Well, you already forgot one thing.
[chuckles nervously] No, I haven't. Have I?
Hello? My birthday cake!
Oh, yeah, that! I'm just getting to that.
That's why I was here in town, yeah. Forget your birthday cake.
You're hilarious, Star, you really are.
Now you just go home and I'm gonna go get your cake,
you silly guy, you.
- Hi. I need a birthday cake. - This is what I got.
Can you change it to say, "Happy Birthday"?
[sighs] Do you want it or not? I haven't got all night.
Yeah, neither do I.
[pants]
Sandy's drill!
- SpongeBob?! - Oh, hi!
Just making sure you have all your hardware.
That's an unusual getup.
Ooh, I thought I'd be a little festive,
- you know, for the scientists. - And the birthday cake?
Uh... [laughs nervously]
Greetings, my distinguished colleagues.
You will witness an invention so revolutionary
it may change modern science forever.
To demonstrate, my assistant here will disrobe
- and enter the machine. - What?
You may be wondering why the subject is disrobing.
It's because...
What's under your gown?
Oh, it must be that spicy kelp I ate earlier.
I gotta use the lavoratory. I'll be right Pat.
Um, back, back. I'll be right...
[chuckles] Happy birthday!
You finally made it!
[chuckles nervously] Big traffic storm.
Well, just leave my present over on the present table.
Your present?
I'm so excited! I've been waiting for a year!
I've got it. It's right there.
Ta-da! All wrapped up and ready to go.
Well, what are you waiting for, buddy?
Serve up the cake so I can tear into that present!
The cake! I must have left it at Sandy's!
You took it to Sandy's?
No! I said, "The bakery delivers. Isn't that handy?"
I think I hear them outside. Wait there while I go check.
- SpongeBob! - Barnacles!
I apologize for the delay.
Now let's continue the demonstration.
I give you... the Proto Generator 2000!
This device gives a single laborer the productivity
of five, six, seven, up to eight workers.
Great for management, but it's also a boon for the worker
because they'll always get high marks on their report cards.
I was just looking at your employee report card...
The telescope!
Without further delay, I shall initiate Proto's sequence.
Uh, Sandy, I hate to delay the proceedings,
but I forgot to mail in this mail-in rebate,
and I'll be right back.
OK, let's get started, Mr. Krabs.
What happened to your clothes, boy?
Uh, sardines. I was attacked by a can of wild sardines.
Now let's finish this telescope.
Boy?
Hold on, boy. You're supposed to be using
that motorized hex drill. Where is it?
Ah! I left it at Patrick's rock!
Patrick's rock? What's it doing there?
SpongeBob, wait! Get back here, boy!
SpongeBob, why are your clothes invisible?
Can I borrow your present?
No! No! No, you can't borrow my birthday present!
Not even for a minute?
No, not until they deliver my birthday cake!
OK, I'll be right back.
Hold on! Where are you going?!
I'm here! [gasps]
Hold it! Where's my little assistant going this time?
Your little assistant? That's my assistant you're talking to.
- What's goin' on around here? - Yeah, I'd like to know also.
What kind of birthday present is this?
Hey, SpongeBob was supposed to bring that to me.
That looks like my power drill.
You've got a lot of explaining to do, mister.
I've got something to say.
I have got something to say! [all gasp]
I know you all had important things going on tonight.
Mr. Krabs, with your telescope, Patrick, your birthday,
and Sandy, you have this big presentation.
I just couldn't say no to any of you.
Aw, you overextended yourself.
- You should have said something. - We'd work something out.
Aw, you know, you guys are right.
It was silly to think I could be in three places at once.
Nonsense, SpongeBob, of course you can.
If you'll just step into the Proto Generator 2000.
First, I close the Proto chamber.
And finally...
[rumbling, beeping]
As you can see, I've produced two clones of my subject
which will allow him to honor all the commitments he's made.
- [all cheer] - Did you hear that, SpongeBob?
You can be in three places at once now.
[snores]