ARE YOU READY, KIDS?
all: AYE-AYE, CAPTAIN.
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
all: AYE-AYE, CAPTAIN!
♪ OH... ♪
♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA? ♪
all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
- ♪ ABSORBENT, AND YELLOW, AND POROUS IS HE ♪
all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
- ♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE SOMETHING YOU WISH ♪
all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
- ♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK AND FLOP LIKE A FISH! ♪
- all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! - READY?
all: ♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
- [throaty laughter] - [flute riff]
[laughing]
HA!
[sniffing]
[giggling]
[cackling]
- TO WHAT DO I OWE THE EXCESSIVE VOLUME
OF THIS GIGGLING?
- HEH, HEH, YOU MAY THANK
MY NEW AND ORIGINAL IDEA, DARLING.
FREE SAMPLES!
- "NEW AND ORIGINAL," MY EXHAUST FAN.
- OKAY, SO I DIDN'T INVENT THE CONCEPT,
BUT I HAVE IMPROVED UPON IT BY REMOVING
THE ONLY OBSTACLE TO CHUM'S SUCCESS.
YOU MEAN THE SMELL?
[laughing] THE SMELL...
- NO, I MEAN GETTING THE PUBLIC TO TRY SOME.
ONCE EVERYONE GETS A TASTE OF MY DELICIOUS CHUM,
THEY'LL TEAR THIS PLACE APART TO GET SOME.
PLUS, IT'S FREE. AND WHO CAN RESIST FREE?
STEP RIGHT UP FOR YOUR FREE SAMPLES
OF DELICIOUS CHUM.
- HEY, WHAT DID HE JUST SAY TO US?
- I JUST SAID THEY'RE FREE!
- OH, I THOUGHT HE SAID, "FREAKS."
IN THAT CASE...
SO GLAD I ACTUALLY LEFT MY HOUSE TODAY.
- THAT'S THE SPIRIT, PEOPLE. STEP ON UP.
BUT PLEASE TAKE YOUR TIME AND BE ORDERLY.
I WANNA SAVOR THIS WHOLE
"PUTTING KRABS OUT OF BUSINESS" BUSINESS.
WHAT IS IT?
- OH, WHO CARES, SILLY MCNILLY?
IT'S FREE!
- OOH, IT'S GONNA BE SO GOOD...
'CAUSE IT'S FREE!
- EAT UP! [chuckling]
- [groaning] - WHAT?
NO!
[moaning]
[all wailing]
- UGH, I HAD NO IDEA THE CHUM WAS THIS ROTTEN.
I BETTER NOT BE HERE WHEN ALL THIS AGONY
TURNS TO ANGER.
- HEY, HE'S MAKING A RUN FOR IT.
WE CAN'T LET HIM GET AWAY WITH THIS.
LET'S GET UP AND-- [gags]
GET HIM.
all: YEAH!
FREE SAMPLES.
YUM.
[gobbling]
[outraged hollering]
- HEY, YOU. I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE.
IT'S NOT FAIR.
IF KRABS GAVE AWAY FREE SAMPLES,
HE WOULDN'T GET THIS TREATMENT.
- IF KRABS GAVE AWAY FREE SAMPLES,
HE PROBABLY WOULDN'T POISON PEOPLE,
THUS TARNISHING THE GOOD NAME OF HIS RESTAURANT.
- YEAH, I SUPPOSE YOU'RE RIGHT, KA--
FREE KRABBY PATTIES.
STEP UP, STEP UP.
YOU'LL NEVER GET THIS CHANCE AGAIN, FOLKS.
FREE KRABBY PATTIES?
[exclamations]
- HEY, WHAT'S ALL THE HUBBUB?
OH, DIDN'T YOU HEAR?
SOMEONE'S GIVING AWAY FREE KRABBY PATTIES.
[overlapping chatter]
THAT'S IT.
[laughing]
HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.
AREN'T YOU THE SAME GUY WHAT WAS GIVING AWAY
THEM ROTTED CHUM SAMPLES BEFORE?
- UH, OH, THAT WASN'T ME.
THAT WAS, UH, MY... BROTHER-IN-LAW.
YEAH, UH, "FLANKTON."
OH, OKAY.
all: UGH...
[moaning]
KRABBY PATTIES, ANYONE?
[overlapping chatter]
UGH...
[retching]
[collective retching]
- ♪ OH, I'M OFF TO WORK ♪
♪ OFF TO WORK ♪
♪ READY FOR GRILLIN' AND FULFILLIN' ♪
[angry chatter]
- AH, THOSE CUSTOMERS SURE CAN'T GET ENOUGH KRABBY PATTIES.
SETTLE DOWN, FOLKS, I'M HERE.
I SHALL HAVE YOUR KRABBY PATTIES BEFORE YOU SHORTLY.
YOU!
- YOU MADE THOSE AWFUL KRABBY PATTIES
WHAT MADE MY EYEBALLS FALL OUT.
[angry hollers]
MR. KRABS.
OVER HERE, BOY.
- WHAT IS GOING ON OUT THERE?
- THE WHOLE TOWN HAS TURNED AGAINST ME,
AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.
[irate chatter]
- "BECAUSE THE KRABBY PATTY IS TERRIBLE."
[gasping] KRABBY PATTY?
TERRIBLE?
HOW DO THOSE WORDS EVEN GO TOGETHER?
- I DON'T KNOW, BUT WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING
TO TURN THIS SITUATION AROUND.
- SPONGEBOB, YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE GOTTA DO EVERYTHING IN OUR POWER
TO BRING THOSE CUSTOMERS BACK.
WE'LL TRIPLE THE PRICES.
- MR. KRABS, IF WE WANNA GET CUSTOMERS
IN HERE, SHOULDN'T WE LOWER THE PRICES?
FINE.
HOW 'BOUT THAT?
[overlapping shouting]
- I'M RUINED. [sobbing]
- MR. KRABS, IF YOU WANT YOUR CUSTOMERS BACK,
WE'RE GONNA NEED TO TAKE MORE EXTREME MEASURES.
I'M ALL EARS.
- WE SIMPLY GIVE KRABBY PATTIES AWAY FOR--
- DON'T YOU SAY IT, BOY!
- IT'S THE ONLY WAY, MR. KRABS.
ALL RIGHT, SIR. IT'S TIME.
- TIME? BUT IT'S TOO SOON.
I'M NOT READY TO LET THEM GO FREE.
- BUT YOU SAID TO GO AHEAD WITH THE PLAN
NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU FIGHT ME.
- I-I DON'T REMEMBER SAYING ANYTHING LIKE THAT.
I DO.
AAH!
FREE KRABBY PATTIES.
GET YOUR TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY FREE-OF-CHARGE KRABBY PATTIES.
NO!
[grunting]
- IT'S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, EUGENE.
FREE KRABBY PATTIES!
COME AND GET YOUR FREE KRABBY PATTIES!
- WHEW, FOR A SECOND THERE, I THOUGHT WE WERE
GONNA HAVE TO GIVE AWAY A TON OF KRABBY PATTIES,
BUT IT LOOKS LIKE FREE AIN'T EVEN ENOUGH
TO JUMPSTART ME BUSINESS.
WAIT...FREE AIN'T EVEN ENOUGH?
ME BUSINESS IS DOOMED!
[weeping]
- I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE HOW WELL THIS IS TURNING OUT
FOR ME TODAY.
[laughing]
- HMM, LOOKS LIKE IT'S TIME TO PULL OUT THE BIG GUNS.
[calliope playing]
NO ONE CAN RESIST THE SWEET SOUNDS OF THE CALLIOPE.
- OH, LOOK, BILLY. A CALLIOPE.
- OKAY, SQUIDWARD, HERE'S YOUR CUP.
JUST LIKE WE REHEARSED.
- ARGH, I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS.
- HERE, LET ME HELP YOU, SQUIDWARD.
[grunting]
OW! AH! OOF!
HELLO.
- LOOK, MAMA, A MONKEY.
DANCE, MONKEY, DANCE.
DANCE, MONKEY!
I QUIT.
[weeping]
- WAIT, SQUIDWARD, DON'T LEAVE.
WE CAN'T GIVE UP YET.
[bawling]
[laughing]
SWEET AND DELICIOUS VICTORY, YOU ARE MINE.
- DON'T WORRY, MR. KRABS.
WE'LL FIX THIS.
NOT THIS TIME, BOY.
IT'S ALL OVER FOR THE GOOD OLD KRUSTY KRAB.
IT'S PROBABLY BEST IF YOU START LOOKING
FOR A NEW JOB, BOY.
MAYBE IN A DIFFERENT LINE OF WORK.
NEW?
DIFFERENT?
THAT'S IT!
- WELL, THAT WENT BETTER THAN EXPECTED.
WELL, ONLY ONE THING LEFT TO DO NOW.
I'LL HAVE TO MOVE BACK IN WITH ME MA.
HOPEFULLY SHE KEPT ME POSTERS UP IN ME ROOM.
KRABBY PATTIES!
BRAND NEW KRABBY PATTY RECIPE.
ALL NEW, ALL DIFFERENT,
ALL DELICIOUS.
TRY THEM FOR FREE.
HE CAN'T BE SERIOUS.
- I'M SO HUNGRY, I DON'T CARE.
I GOTTA EAT SOMETHING.
NO! WAIT!
- LET HIM GO. IT'S...TOO LATE.
- ALL NEW, FREE KRABBY PATTIES.
- HEY, BUDDY, I'LL TRY ONE.
WHAT HAVE I GOT TO LOSE?
all: NO!
[chomping]
[gulping down]
DEAR NEPTUNE'S GILL SACKS,
THIS IS THE BEST THING
I'VE EVER PUT IN MY MOUTH! YAY!
- OH! - AMAZING.
- DID HE JUST SAY IT WAS GOOD?
[chewing]
WHOO-HOO!
- WOW, FRANK NEVER DANCES.
THEY MUST BE GOOD.
[excited chatter]
[gobbling]
[gulping]
I CAN'T EAT SOMETHING THIS AMAZING FOR FREE.
HOW MUCH WILL THIS BUY ME?
[slurping]
OOH, YUM, YUM... YUM, YUM, YUM, YUM.
YUM, YUM!
[chirping]
HEY, YOU, PATTY BOY. TAKE MY WALLET.
I GOTTA HAVE MORE.
[laughing]
both: NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TAKING ABOUT.
- HERE'S OUR LIFE SAVINGS.
JUST GIVE US MORE KRABBY PATTIES.
- DON'T WORRY, KAREN. I'LL BE HOME BEFORE LUNCHTIME.
MY MISSION HERE IS ACCOMPLISHED.
[laughing maniacally]
OOH, WHAT THE...HUH?
[gasping]
IT'S WORKING.
NO, WAIT.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
YOU HATE KRABBY PATTIES, REMEMBER?
WOWEE.
THIS THING IS RIGHT TASTY.
[beeping sounds]
- UH-OH.
[gasping]
[wheezing]
[gasping]
- MONEY, MONEY, MONEY MONEY, MONEY, MONEY!
- AAH--OOF!
[laughing]
- WE DID IT, MR. KRABS.
WE SAVED THE KRUSTY KRAB.
AND ALL I DID WAS SELL THE SAME OLD KRABBY PATTIES
AND CALL THEM NEW.
- DO YOU MIND? I'M TRYING TO MAKE A MONEY ANGEL HERE.
OOH, MONEY ANGELS.
CAN I MAKE ONE?
- SURE THING, SPONGEBOB.
HOP IN.
[both laughing]
AAH!
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
HEAR WHAT?
HMM. GOOD POINT.
[both laughing]
[snoring]
[yawning]
AH, WHAT COULD GO WRONG ON A BEAUTIFUL DAY LIKE THIS?
[singing]
GARY, TIME FOR BREAKFAST.
THE HOUSE MUST BE SETTLING.
OOH, THAT'S BETTER.
I CAN FIX THIS.
I'LL FEED YOU WHEN I'M DONE.
[grumbling]
- JUST A LITTLE HANDYMAN'S KNOWHOW
IS ALL IT TAKES, GARY.
[whimpering]
- OH, SORRY, GARY. YOU WANNA EAT, HUH?
DON'T WORRY. I CAN FIX BOTH PROBLEMS.
OKAY, NOW THAT THAT'S TAKEN CARE OF,
TIME TO FEED GARY.
OH, NO. THIS IS WORSE THAN I THOUGHT.
MY DOOR!
[gasping]
[glass shattering]
AAH!
[straining]
ARGH...
PATRICK!
[whirring]
- [intercom beeping] - MR. STAR...
I HAVE A SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ON LINE THREE.
PUT HIM THROUGH.
PATRICK!
PATRICK STAR!
- WELL, HEY, SPONGEBOB.
YOU REALLY NEED TO CLEAN UP AROUND HERE.
- AAH! AAH! IT'S THE BIG ONE!
AAH!
IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD. INVEST IN GOLD.
HOARD YOUR DRINKING WA--
AH, I SHOULD'VE KNOWN.
GRR, WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?
- YOU'RE JUST IN TIME TO LEND A HAND, SQUIDWARD.
- LEND A HAND? NO--AAH!
AAH!
YOW!
- PATRICK, CALL SANDY. TELL HER TO GET OVER HERE FAST.
- WHOA, OH, SAY NO MORE, BUDDY.
HURRY, PATRICK.
I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN HOLD THIS.
HOWDY, CHEEKS RESIDENCE.
- SANDY, DON'T HANG UP! - WHAT DO YOU WANT?
OH, NOTHING.
I'M JUST HANGING OUT WITH THE SPONGE.
HOW--HOW 'BOUT YOU?
OH, YOU KNOW.
LITTLE OF THIS, LITTLE OF THAT.
LITTLE VACUUMING.
- HEH, HEH, SOUNDS LIKE FUN.
HA, HA, WISH I WAS OVER THERE.
SPONGEBOB'S HOUSE IS BORING.
HA, THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON OVER HERE.
[crashing]
- WELL, THAT SURE DON'T SOUND LIKE NOTHING. WHAT'S ALL THE RUCKUS?
- OH, SPONGEBOB'S PINEAPPLE IS ROTTING,
AND FALLING APART ALL AROUND US.
WE'RE DOOMED.
I'LL BE RIGHT OVER.
OH, TAKE YOUR TIME.
HOLDING STEADY, PATRICK.
BUT WHO KNOWS HOW LONG THIS SUPPORT SYSTEM WILL LAST?
OW.
- THIS PLACE SURE WENT TO POT QUICK.
KNOCKITY-KNOCK, SPONGEBOB.
NO, SANDY, DON'T!
WE MUST NEVER, NEVER KNOCK.
THIS PINEAPPLE COULD TOPPLE OVER
AT THE SLIGHTEST GES--
[creaking]
- ...TURE. - SPONGEBOB.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE AT WORK TWO HOURS AGO.
[chatter]
HELLO, ANYBODY HERE?
HELLO?
YOU GUYS KNOW HOW TO MAKE A KRABBY PATTY?
- NO, BUT I KNOW HOW TO OPEN A CASH REGISTER.
- YOUR TARDINESS IS COSTING ME MONEY.
- I KNOW, MR. KRABS, I'M SORRY,
- BUT MY HOUSE-- - AND SQUIDWARD...
I EXPECT MORE FROM YOU.
UH, ACTUALLY, NO, I DON'T.
- WELL, I'M WITH YOU, SPONGEBOB,
AND I'VE GOT THE TOOLBOX TO PROVE IT.
I'M HERE BECAUSE...
WAIT, WHY AM I HERE?
SPONGEBOB!
I'M HAVING ANOTHER EXIT-PENCILS CRISIS!
NOT NOW, PATRICK.
AND SQUIDWARD HAS DONE A GREAT JOB
HOLDING IT ALL TOGETHER.
- AGAINST MY WILL, I MIGHT ADD.
- SO WHAT DO YOU SAY, MR. KRABS?
WILL YOU HELP?
WELL...
I SUPPOSE I COULD JOIN THE CAUSE. BUT IT'LL HAVE TO BE OUR STANDARD DEAL.
- A WEEK OF MY WAGES PER HOUR?
YOU GOT IT, KIDDO.
- WELL, WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?
LET'S GET THIS RESTORATION UNDERWAY.
[whirring]
PERFECTLY CALIBRATED.
OW!
NOT A BAD BIT OF WAINSCOTTERY, IF I DO SAY SO MESELF.
NOW TO PUT THE FINISHING TOUCHES ON HER.
OH.
HMM. HMM.
YUP. UH-HUH.
[grunting]
- UM, UH, EXCUSE ME, EVERYONE.
NOT TO MICROMANAGE, OR ANYTHING,
BUT DO ANY OF YOU ACTUALLY KNOW HOW TO BUILD A PINEAPPLE?
- WELL, OF COURSE WE DO, SILLY.
FIRSTLY, EVERY PINEAPPLE NEEDS A SOLID FOUNDATION
TO KEEP IT FIRMLY IN PLACE.
[chuckling] NOT EXACTLY, MISS CHEEKS.
A PINEAPPLE NEEDS TO BE MOBILE,
WITH A STRONG HULL ATTACHED
IN CASE YOU EVER NEED TO SKIP TOWN UNEXPECTEDLY.
WRONG.
[grunting]
A PINEAPPLE NEEDS A SWEET, BUT TANGY FLAVOR.
[munching] MM.
- THOSE ARE ALL GREAT IDEAS, BUT--
- BUT ARGUING ABOUT IT
AIN'T GONNA GET THIS PINEAPPLE FIXED.
GOOD POINT.
OKAY, FELLERS, FROM NOW ON,
WE INCORPORATE EVERYONE'S IDEAS.
both: YEAH!
- UH, THAT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT I HAD IN MIND, SANDY--
- WHOA! - FIRST THING WE GOTTA DO...
IS CLEAR OUT ALL THIS OLD JUNK.
- SANDY, MY FURNITURE IS PERFECTLY FINE.
HEADS UP!
CAREFUL, BOY.
I THOUGHT I'D INSTALL A GRILL IN YOUR TV ROOM,
FOR THOSE NIGHTS WHEN YOU HAVE TO BRING WORK HOME WITH YOU.
- YEAH, BUT I LIKE TO WATCH TV IN MY TV ROOM.
- WELL, THIS AIN'T THE TV ROOM ANYMORE.
THIS IS YOUR INDOOR GARDEN.
- BUT THE SOFA GOES THERE.
- OH, I KNOW. BUT ISN'T THIS BETTER?
[meowing]
- GARY, DO YOU EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE NOT BEING LISTENED TO?
[yowling]
- SANDY, WE NEED TO TALK.
ABOUT THESE COLUMNS?
NICE, HUH?
GIVES THE PINEAPPLE AN INTELLECTUAL FLAVOR.
- YEAH, BUT I KIND OF LIKE MY PINEAPPLE THE WAY IT WAS.
I DON'T NEED ALL THESE FANCY--
[muffled speech]
UH, SORRY, BUDDY.
I-I CAN'T UNDERSTAND YOU.
YOU GOT SOMETHING IN YOUR MOUTH.
- HO, HO. KIDDO, LOOK OUT.
I'M JUST APPLYING SOME NICE STUCCO EXTERIOR HERE.
[spitting]
I GUESS WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS...
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH A PINEAPPLE
THAT LOOKS LIKE A PINEAPPLE.
[mewing]
- [gasping] OH, NO, GARY.
I STILL HAVEN'T FED YOU.
LET'S TAKE CARE OF THAT RIGHT NOW, LITTLE BUDDY-- [thudding]
[crashing]
[thumping]
[grunting]
[groaning]
[straining]
OH, IT'S JUST NOT A HOME WITHOUT A ROCK
TO SLEEP UNDER.
- SO WHAT DO YOU THINK, SPONGEBOB?
IT'S, UH...
YEAH?
IT'S, UM...
FANTASTIC?
IT'S, UH...
I'M HUNGRY.
- YOU ALL WORKED VERY HARD...
- WHOO-HOO!
- WHOO! YEE-HAW!
- AND SINCE YOU'RE SUCH A SATISFIED CUSTOMER,
I ONLY CHARGED YOU DOUBLE.
- GOOD JOB, FELLAS. - GOOD WORK, LADS.
- HUH, HUH, I'M STARVING.
- WELL, HERE IT IS, GARY. OUR NEW HOME.
MM, THIS MUST BE PATRICK'S CONTRIBUTION
TO THE LIVING ROOM.
HEY, VINTAGE CONDIMENT JUGS.
THANK YOU, MR. KRABS.
YAAAAAH...
AAH!
[screaming]
GARY, WHERE'S THE SINK? AAH!
AAH!
[burbling water]
[panting]
[grunting]
GARY, I DON'T THINK THAT WAS A SINK.
[vocalizing]
- THANKS FOR THE FUTURISTIC BATHROOM, SANDY.
[yowling]
- WELL, IT ISN'T EXACTLY "HOME SWEET PINEAPPLE,"
BUT I SUPPOSE IT COULD BE MUCH WORSE.
WE STILL HAVE A ROOF OVER OUR HEADS,
AND FOOD ON THE TABLE.
HEY, THAT REMINDS ME.
YOU STILL HAVEN'T EATEN TODAY, HAVE YOU?
SORRY, BUDDY, YOU MUST BE FAMISHED.
[yawling]
AAH!
I'M UNRAVELING!
IF YOU EVER-- AND I MEAN EVER--
OH, MY NECK!
I'M GONNA BE AT THE CHIROPRACTOR'S
FOR A WEEK.
- WELL, GARY, THERE'S ONLY ONE THING LEFT TO DO--
CALL AND HAVE THIS PLACE CONDEMNED.
[dialing]
HELLO, OPERATOR?
CITY HALL, PLEASE. OFFICE OF BROKEN DREAMS.
[meowing]
- OH, GARY, I'M SORRY.
WITH ALL THIS HOUSE RUCKUS,
I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO FEED YOU.
HERE YOU GO, BUDDY.
"FURNISHED PINEAPPLE IN A CAN."
OH, GARY, YOU ARE THE BEST!
[laughing]