1
00:00:00,138 --> 00:00:02,238
( yells )
2
00:00:02,273 --> 00:00:06,476
Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
3
00:00:06,512 --> 00:00:10,981
and MTV TELEVISION NETWORKS
4
00:00:13,552 --> 00:00:15,719
MISS FOWL:
Now I will demonstrate
5
00:00:15,754 --> 00:00:19,455
how a common household monkey
can be taught to square dance.
6
00:00:19,491 --> 00:00:21,491
PRINCIPAL WILLOUGHBY:
Yoo-hoo.
7
00:00:21,527 --> 00:00:23,126
Hope I'm not interrupting.
8
00:00:23,161 --> 00:00:24,528
Principal Willoughby!
9
00:00:24,563 --> 00:00:25,795
Of course not.
10
00:00:25,831 --> 00:00:28,097
Well, I've got some
great news, kids.
11
00:00:28,133 --> 00:00:31,300
Lindbergh School
is going to sponsor
a TV program
12
00:00:31,336 --> 00:00:32,368
on public access.
13
00:00:32,404 --> 00:00:33,336
( exclaims )
14
00:00:33,371 --> 00:00:35,605
( kids moan and yawn )
15
00:00:35,641 --> 00:00:37,974
Oh, I know, isn't it exciting?
16
00:00:38,010 --> 00:00:41,011
If anyone would like to pitch
ideas for the show's format,
17
00:00:41,046 --> 00:00:44,180
you just feel free to drop by
my office after lunch.
18
00:00:44,215 --> 00:00:45,415
A public access show.
19
00:00:45,450 --> 00:00:47,617
Finally, a way
to educate the masses
20
00:00:47,653 --> 00:00:50,554
by sharing my love
of complex scientific theorems.
21
00:00:50,589 --> 00:00:52,088
CINDY:
Earth to Nerdtron.
22
00:00:52,123 --> 00:00:53,423
Forget it.
23
00:00:53,458 --> 00:00:55,559
Jimmy, you wouldn't
know good television
24
00:00:55,594 --> 00:00:57,994
if it bit you in
the Bunsen burner.
25
00:00:58,030 --> 00:00:58,728
Right!
26
00:00:58,764 --> 00:01:00,430
Oh, yuck it up, she-losers,
27
00:01:00,465 --> 00:01:04,500
but my program is going to give
people what they really want--
28
00:01:04,536 --> 00:01:07,370
thoughtful and informative
programming.
29
00:01:08,574 --> 00:01:11,074
It's a show
about nothing.
30
00:01:11,109 --> 00:01:12,876
Nothing but puppets!
31
00:01:12,911 --> 00:01:16,446
Dad, is it wrong
to tell a lie?
32
00:01:16,481 --> 00:01:19,415
Son, let me tell you
a little story.
33
00:01:19,451 --> 00:01:20,550
( screams )
34
00:01:20,586 --> 00:01:22,852
Giant radioactive worms!
35
00:01:23,655 --> 00:01:25,354
I'm all right, Dad.
36
00:01:25,390 --> 00:01:26,990
Dad?
37
00:01:27,025 --> 00:01:28,091
Dad?
38
00:01:28,126 --> 00:01:29,525
Next!
39
00:01:29,561 --> 00:01:31,294
Singing and dancing
is the way to go.
40
00:01:31,329 --> 00:01:32,428
Kick it, girl.
41
00:01:32,464 --> 00:01:33,463
( hip-hop music playing )
42
00:01:33,498 --> 00:01:34,530
WILLOUGHBY:
Next!
43
00:01:34,566 --> 00:01:35,498
Fade in.
44
00:01:35,533 --> 00:01:37,701
Close-up on my face.
45
00:01:37,736 --> 00:01:39,235
That's the show.
46
00:01:39,270 --> 00:01:40,837
Hmm.
47
00:01:40,872 --> 00:01:41,805
Next!
48
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:44,207
Um, what's public access?
49
00:01:44,242 --> 00:01:45,675
( sighs )
50
00:01:45,711 --> 00:01:48,678
And that demonstrates
the hyper-gravimetric effects
51
00:01:48,714 --> 00:01:51,748
on all prime numbers greater
than the cube root of n.
52
00:01:51,783 --> 00:01:53,349
Then we go to commercial.
53
00:01:53,384 --> 00:01:56,452
( blubbering )
54
00:01:56,488 --> 00:01:58,521
Congratulations, Jimmy.
55
00:01:58,556 --> 00:02:00,556
That was the worst pitch
all day.
56
00:02:00,592 --> 00:02:01,658
Oh.
57
00:02:01,693 --> 00:02:03,426
Then why are you
congratulating me?
58
00:02:03,461 --> 00:02:07,363
Well, because, in accordance
with FCC regulation 97002/J...
59
00:02:07,398 --> 00:02:08,832
( clears throat )
60
00:02:08,867 --> 00:02:11,167
all school-run programs
must be educational,
61
00:02:11,202 --> 00:02:13,703
having no entertainment value
whatsoever.
62
00:02:13,739 --> 00:02:15,839
Ergo, you got the job, hotshot.
63
00:02:15,874 --> 00:02:16,439
Yes!
64
00:02:16,474 --> 00:02:19,342
I can see it all now--
65
00:02:19,377 --> 00:02:22,211
lights, camera, science!
66
00:02:22,247 --> 00:02:23,680
CARL:
The universe.
67
00:02:23,715 --> 00:02:26,916
It's really, really, really,
really big and stuff.
68
00:02:26,952 --> 00:02:32,355
Join us now as we voyage
into the unknown
69
00:02:32,390 --> 00:02:36,459
on Science with Jimmy.
70
00:02:36,494 --> 00:02:37,493
Yay!
71
00:02:37,529 --> 00:02:38,561
Hey-ho!
72
00:02:38,596 --> 00:02:40,030
That's enough, Carl.
73
00:02:40,065 --> 00:02:41,031
Sorry.
74
00:02:41,066 --> 00:02:41,831
Uh, hi.
75
00:02:41,867 --> 00:02:43,833
Welcome to Science with Jimmy.
76
00:02:43,869 --> 00:02:47,603
Today's segment is called
"Fun with Heavy Gravity."
77
00:02:47,639 --> 00:02:49,673
And so, without further ado,
78
00:02:49,708 --> 00:02:53,209
I give you
the Gravitrax SK30.
79
00:02:53,244 --> 00:02:54,544
I shall now attempt
80
00:02:54,579 --> 00:02:56,479
to alter
my assistant's density
81
00:02:56,514 --> 00:02:58,882
via graviton particle
bombardment.
82
00:02:58,917 --> 00:03:00,917
Atomic batteries
to power.
83
00:03:00,952 --> 00:03:02,786
Turbines to speed...
84
00:03:04,522 --> 00:03:06,556
Initiating sequence...
85
00:03:06,591 --> 00:03:07,824
Now!
86
00:03:11,429 --> 00:03:12,729
( giggling )
87
00:03:12,764 --> 00:03:14,130
It tickles.
88
00:03:14,166 --> 00:03:15,098
And voilà!
89
00:03:15,133 --> 00:03:18,601
The test subject
is now much heavier.
90
00:03:18,636 --> 00:03:20,870
( clapping )
91
00:03:20,906 --> 00:03:22,471
( giggling )
92
00:03:22,507 --> 00:03:24,908
Uh, well, it's kind
of hard to see,
93
00:03:24,943 --> 00:03:26,843
but take my word for it.
94
00:03:26,878 --> 00:03:31,280
His atomic structure is
now really, really dense.
95
00:03:31,316 --> 00:03:33,216
( laughs )
96
00:03:33,251 --> 00:03:34,550
Psst.
97
00:03:34,586 --> 00:03:36,953
Jimmy, this experiment's
a stink burger.
98
00:03:36,988 --> 00:03:37,687
Move on.
99
00:03:37,723 --> 00:03:39,689
No, no, no, w-w-wait.
100
00:03:39,725 --> 00:03:41,991
Maybe if I increase
the intensity...
101
00:03:42,027 --> 00:03:43,626
( device whirring loudly )
102
00:03:43,661 --> 00:03:46,229
Jimmy, I feel kind of funny.
103
00:03:46,264 --> 00:03:47,964
We need more power.
104
00:03:47,999 --> 00:03:49,532
Look at
our little Jimbo.
105
00:03:49,567 --> 00:03:51,000
The camera loves him.
106
00:03:53,271 --> 00:03:54,237
( shouts )
107
00:03:56,374 --> 00:03:57,506
( shouts )
108
00:03:57,542 --> 00:03:59,843
Uh, I can fix that.
109
00:04:02,614 --> 00:04:04,280
( screams )
Oh, no! Run.
110
00:04:04,315 --> 00:04:05,782
Let's get
out of here!
111
00:04:05,817 --> 00:04:08,451
My mistake; the camera
only likes him
as a friend.
112
00:04:08,486 --> 00:04:11,154
Now, that's good television.
113
00:04:12,490 --> 00:04:14,457
Uh, that's all the time we have.
114
00:04:14,492 --> 00:04:15,591
Join us again next week.
115
00:04:15,627 --> 00:04:16,659
Bye!
116
00:04:16,694 --> 00:04:17,861
Well, Jimmy,
117
00:04:17,896 --> 00:04:21,364
that was the worst show
I've ever seen.
118
00:04:21,399 --> 00:04:22,531
I understand.
119
00:04:22,567 --> 00:04:24,667
I'd fire me, too,
if I were you.
120
00:04:24,702 --> 00:04:26,636
Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
on the contrary.
121
00:04:26,671 --> 00:04:28,638
We've decided
to retool the format
122
00:04:28,673 --> 00:04:31,141
to make it kind of
remotely interesting.
123
00:04:31,176 --> 00:04:32,108
Really?
124
00:04:32,144 --> 00:04:33,209
That's great.
125
00:04:33,245 --> 00:04:34,043
Who's "we"?
126
00:04:34,079 --> 00:04:35,879
Your new
creative team.
127
00:04:35,914 --> 00:04:39,415
Jimmy, I'd like you
to meet the new producer
128
00:04:39,450 --> 00:04:41,184
of Science with Jimmy.
129
00:04:41,219 --> 00:04:43,019
No!
130
00:04:43,054 --> 00:04:45,588
And your new co-host.
131
00:04:45,623 --> 00:04:47,423
No!
132
00:04:47,458 --> 00:04:48,524
Jimmy, calm down.
133
00:04:48,559 --> 00:04:51,694
We know that
you want the show
to educate people.
134
00:04:51,729 --> 00:04:54,597
We deeply and genuinely
respect that.
135
00:04:54,632 --> 00:04:56,232
No!
136
00:04:56,268 --> 00:04:57,167
You do?
137
00:04:57,202 --> 00:04:58,401
Of course.
138
00:04:58,436 --> 00:05:01,137
We just want
to make a few
tiny adjustments.
139
00:05:01,173 --> 00:05:01,938
Exactly.
140
00:05:01,973 --> 00:05:03,106
You have our word
141
00:05:03,141 --> 00:05:05,474
that science will
always come first
142
00:05:05,510 --> 00:05:06,876
on Science with Jimmy.
143
00:05:06,912 --> 00:05:10,013
Please, you seriously
expect me to trust you?
144
00:05:10,048 --> 00:05:13,783
If you don't do the show,
we'll get someone else.
145
00:05:13,819 --> 00:05:17,187
Like I said, time
to make some show-biz magic.
146
00:05:19,925 --> 00:05:22,192
Dad, you've been bitten.
147
00:05:22,227 --> 00:05:25,561
You're turning
into a giant worm.
148
00:05:25,596 --> 00:05:26,863
Run, run, son.
149
00:05:26,898 --> 00:05:29,199
Run while you can.
150
00:05:29,234 --> 00:05:30,834
I love you, Dad.
151
00:05:30,869 --> 00:05:33,502
Jimmy, where you been
the last few days?
152
00:05:33,538 --> 00:05:34,603
In the lab.
153
00:05:34,639 --> 00:05:36,272
Letting Cindy
and Libby produce
154
00:05:36,308 --> 00:05:38,141
gave me time to focus
on the science.
155
00:05:38,176 --> 00:05:39,642
Yeah, uh,
listen, Jimmy,
156
00:05:39,677 --> 00:05:41,777
there's something
you should know.
157
00:05:41,813 --> 00:05:44,780
I've come up with some
great new experiments.
158
00:05:44,816 --> 00:05:47,116
This is going to be
our best show ever.
159
00:05:47,152 --> 00:05:49,285
He's living
in a dream world.
160
00:05:49,321 --> 00:05:50,220
( screams )
161
00:05:50,255 --> 00:05:51,988
W-What happened
to my set?
162
00:05:52,023 --> 00:05:53,823
Do you love it?
163
00:05:53,859 --> 00:05:55,725
"Funky Jam Dance Party"?
164
00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:56,926
With some science.
165
00:05:56,962 --> 00:05:58,928
You said you were
only going to make
166
00:05:58,964 --> 00:06:00,029
some tiny changes.
167
00:06:00,065 --> 00:06:01,164
And they are tiny.
168
00:06:01,199 --> 00:06:03,466
Jimmy, baby,
you're Mr. Science.
169
00:06:03,501 --> 00:06:06,736
Just do the show the way
you would normally.
170
00:06:06,771 --> 00:06:09,005
Yeah, Jimmy, don't sweat it.
171
00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:10,940
We're here
to support you.
172
00:06:10,976 --> 00:06:13,576
Places, people--
we're on in ten.
173
00:06:14,913 --> 00:06:16,479
I don't know, Sheen.
174
00:06:16,514 --> 00:06:17,947
This doesn't feel right.
175
00:06:17,983 --> 00:06:21,050
Duh! I told you
the show needs
more puppets.
176
00:06:21,086 --> 00:06:23,987
And we're live
in three, two, one.
177
00:06:24,022 --> 00:06:27,490
Cue lights, cue music,
cue Funk Master Nicky Nick.
178
00:06:27,525 --> 00:06:29,092
Funk Master Nicky Nick?
179
00:06:29,127 --> 00:06:31,761
( playing hip-hop )
180
00:06:31,796 --> 00:06:33,796
Hey, everybody,
it's time to get down
181
00:06:33,831 --> 00:06:36,099
with America's favorite
educational program,
182
00:06:36,134 --> 00:06:38,401
Funky Jam Dance Party.
183
00:06:38,436 --> 00:06:39,702
( cheering loudly )
184
00:06:39,737 --> 00:06:41,204
With some science.
185
00:06:41,239 --> 00:06:42,071
Whatever.
186
00:06:42,107 --> 00:06:43,639
And now give it up
187
00:06:43,674 --> 00:06:47,110
for the big-headed brother with
the pointy do, Jimmy Neutron!
188
00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:49,212
( music pauses )
189
00:06:49,247 --> 00:06:54,951
Hello and welcome to Funky Jam
Dance Party with Some Science.
190
00:06:54,986 --> 00:06:57,520
In today's segment,
we'll be taking a look
191
00:06:57,555 --> 00:06:59,255
at electron valance orbits.
192
00:06:59,291 --> 00:07:00,156
And kick it!
193
00:07:00,191 --> 00:07:01,224
( hip-hop resumes )
194
00:07:01,259 --> 00:07:03,092
What? I didn't
get a chance...
195
00:07:03,128 --> 00:07:05,128
To represent
Lindbergh Elementary,
196
00:07:05,163 --> 00:07:06,562
we're the Liberteens.
197
00:07:06,597 --> 00:07:07,863
( hoots )
198
00:07:07,899 --> 00:07:10,033
♪ Do you want to be
my lab partner? ♪
199
00:07:10,068 --> 00:07:10,833
♪ Uh-huh ♪
200
00:07:10,868 --> 00:07:12,101
♪ Uh-huh ♪
201
00:07:12,137 --> 00:07:14,170
♪ Do you want to mix
some chemicals? ♪
202
00:07:14,205 --> 00:07:16,205
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
203
00:07:16,241 --> 00:07:19,242
♪ I'll be your test-tube baby ♪
204
00:07:19,277 --> 00:07:25,949
♪ At the Funky Jam
Dance Party... ♪
205
00:07:25,984 --> 00:07:27,716
I can't let them
ruin my show.
206
00:07:27,752 --> 00:07:29,685
Goddard, fetch
the acoustic amp.
207
00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:31,254
Sugarbooger, come quick.
208
00:07:31,289 --> 00:07:33,689
Jimmy's new show is funkerific.
209
00:07:33,724 --> 00:07:35,758
♪ We're gonna fill our beakers ♪
210
00:07:35,793 --> 00:07:36,492
♪ Mm-hmm ♪
211
00:07:36,527 --> 00:07:37,726
♪ Mm-hmm ♪
212
00:07:37,762 --> 00:07:39,262
♪ With sulfuric funk ♪
213
00:07:39,297 --> 00:07:41,230
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! ♪
214
00:07:41,266 --> 00:07:44,567
♪ Test me
with your litmus paper ♪
215
00:07:44,602 --> 00:07:50,506
♪ At the Funky Jam
Dance Party... ♪
216
00:07:50,541 --> 00:07:56,679
( music continuing )
217
00:07:56,714 --> 00:08:00,716
( music playing backwards )
218
00:08:00,751 --> 00:08:01,851
( music stops )
219
00:08:01,886 --> 00:08:05,521
And we're back, with science--
220
00:08:05,556 --> 00:08:08,358
thanks to the acoustical
absorption properties
221
00:08:08,393 --> 00:08:10,960
of my amazing Acoustivac.
222
00:08:10,996 --> 00:08:14,163
Funny story about
quantum sonic fluctu...
223
00:08:14,199 --> 00:08:16,232
( screams )
224
00:08:16,267 --> 00:08:18,267
( audience laughs, applauds )
225
00:08:18,303 --> 00:08:22,238
And now it's time for
adorable hunk tricks.
226
00:08:22,273 --> 00:08:25,074
I want you to give
it up for Nick!
227
00:08:25,110 --> 00:08:26,642
What's up, Nick?
228
00:08:26,677 --> 00:08:29,945
I'm going to style my hair
without using my hands.
229
00:08:29,981 --> 00:08:31,814
Can I get a drum roll, please?
230
00:08:35,220 --> 00:08:37,020
( cheering )
231
00:08:37,055 --> 00:08:38,087
Hey, hey.
232
00:08:38,123 --> 00:08:39,322
Forget the hair.
233
00:08:39,357 --> 00:08:41,924
I'm offering you
a miniature fusion reaction
234
00:08:41,959 --> 00:08:46,262
which perfectly duplicates
the Sun's carbon-nitrogen cycle.
235
00:08:47,932 --> 00:08:49,765
Yo, Nick, flip your hair again.
236
00:08:51,169 --> 00:08:53,669
( cheering, whistling )
237
00:08:53,704 --> 00:09:00,043
( hip-hop resumes )
238
00:09:00,078 --> 00:09:01,010
Ha! Huh!
239
00:09:01,046 --> 00:09:02,478
Whoo!
240
00:09:02,514 --> 00:09:03,279
Give it up.
241
00:09:03,314 --> 00:09:05,214
Got to get
my show back.
242
00:09:05,250 --> 00:09:07,417
By the spirit
of Enrico Fermi,
243
00:09:07,452 --> 00:09:10,086
science shall never
take backseat
244
00:09:10,121 --> 00:09:12,321
to mindless
pop culture again!
245
00:09:12,357 --> 00:09:14,623
Goddard, the Gravitrax.
246
00:09:14,659 --> 00:09:15,824
God-Goddard?
247
00:09:19,130 --> 00:09:20,696
That does it.
248
00:09:23,935 --> 00:09:25,568
( girls yelp )
249
00:09:25,603 --> 00:09:27,070
Get us down!
250
00:09:27,105 --> 00:09:29,972
I can't work like this!
251
00:09:30,007 --> 00:09:31,107
Whee!
252
00:09:31,142 --> 00:09:32,375
Hey!
253
00:09:32,410 --> 00:09:34,910
Hey, Neutron, what's going on?
254
00:09:34,946 --> 00:09:35,945
Whoa!
255
00:09:35,980 --> 00:09:37,447
GIRLS:
Whoa!
256
00:09:37,482 --> 00:09:40,816
Thus, we see how reversing
the polarity on your Gravitrax
257
00:09:40,851 --> 00:09:44,087
can render any lousy dance act
virtually weightless.
258
00:09:44,122 --> 00:09:46,722
Neutron, get us down from here.
259
00:09:46,757 --> 00:09:50,460
Please, join us next week
when empirically deduced data
260
00:09:50,495 --> 00:09:53,396
will once again be
the star of the show.
261
00:09:54,399 --> 00:09:55,864
Well, kids, congrats.
262
00:09:55,900 --> 00:09:59,469
Zero Gravity, Funky Dance Party
Jam with Some Science
263
00:09:59,504 --> 00:10:00,769
killed in the ratings.
264
00:10:00,805 --> 00:10:03,506
Too bad I'm going to have
to cancel it.
265
00:10:03,541 --> 00:10:05,341
What? Why?
266
00:10:05,376 --> 00:10:07,543
Because the network president
doesn't like
267
00:10:07,579 --> 00:10:09,178
science, music or dancing.
268
00:10:09,214 --> 00:10:11,247
Well, then,
what does he like?
269
00:10:11,282 --> 00:10:13,382
SHEEN:
We must destroy
the giant worm.
270
00:10:13,418 --> 00:10:15,050
SHEEN:
No, you mustn't!
271
00:10:15,086 --> 00:10:16,685
That's my father.
272
00:10:16,721 --> 00:10:21,190
( whispers ):
Psst, Carl,
that's your cue.
273
00:10:21,226 --> 00:10:22,458
CARL:
Oh, sorry.
274
00:10:22,494 --> 00:10:23,759
( clears throat )
275
00:10:23,794 --> 00:10:26,295
Must destroy world!
276
00:10:26,331 --> 00:10:28,464
Ow! Gee,
that hurt.
277
00:10:28,500 --> 00:10:33,169
Fuzzy Puppet House Party
with No Science
is puppetastic.
278
00:10:33,204 --> 00:10:34,970
Dad, that's not even a word.
279
00:10:35,006 --> 00:10:36,705
JUDY:
Eat your popcorn,
dear.
280
00:10:50,421 --> 00:10:56,292
MAN:
You're an extraordinary fellow,
Mr. Boy Genius.
281
00:10:56,327 --> 00:11:02,097
Well, prepare to meet your...
um, oh, uh, whatever.
282
00:11:02,133 --> 00:11:04,400
( laughs evilly )
283
00:11:05,870 --> 00:11:08,070
Today I found something
284
00:11:08,105 --> 00:11:13,142
that no one has ever seen before
in the history of the world--
285
00:11:13,178 --> 00:11:16,245
a half-eaten
Crunchy Creme jelly donut!
286
00:11:16,281 --> 00:11:17,647
( kids gasp )
287
00:11:17,682 --> 00:11:19,948
But they're 100% irresistible.
288
00:11:19,984 --> 00:11:22,117
No one cannot finish one.
289
00:11:22,153 --> 00:11:25,555
I'm afraid I know
someone who could--
290
00:11:25,590 --> 00:11:31,494
an old student of mine,
Finbarr Calamitous.
291
00:11:31,529 --> 00:11:33,629
This is his bite mark.
292
00:11:33,665 --> 00:11:34,963
He's back!
293
00:11:34,999 --> 00:11:38,901
So what's so special
about Finbarr Calamitous?
294
00:11:38,936 --> 00:11:41,136
Oh, he was a brilliant boy,
295
00:11:41,172 --> 00:11:44,006
but he could never
finish anything--
296
00:11:44,041 --> 00:11:46,542
homework, inventions,
sentences.
297
00:11:46,578 --> 00:11:48,744
That's why I failed him.
298
00:11:48,779 --> 00:11:50,279
And he was bad!
299
00:11:50,315 --> 00:11:51,380
Like me?
300
00:11:51,416 --> 00:11:53,416
No, Nick.
301
00:11:53,451 --> 00:11:57,286
You're bad in the new sense
of the word, meaning good.
302
00:11:57,322 --> 00:12:00,389
Finbarr was bad
in the old sense of the word.
303
00:12:00,425 --> 00:12:05,094
He disappeared one day
after not finishing his lunch.
304
00:12:05,129 --> 00:12:08,764
I wonder why he's returned.
305
00:12:08,799 --> 00:12:09,832
Carl!
306
00:12:09,867 --> 00:12:10,899
What?
307
00:12:10,935 --> 00:12:12,835
I don't know.
308
00:12:15,172 --> 00:12:22,111
( pounding metallic footsteps )
309
00:12:26,884 --> 00:12:27,550
( doorbell rings )
310
00:12:27,585 --> 00:12:29,084
Are you back home early
311
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:30,653
from your mother's, Sugarbo...
312
00:12:30,688 --> 00:12:32,755
Hey, you're not Sugarbooger.
313
00:12:32,790 --> 00:12:34,056
Good morning.
314
00:12:34,091 --> 00:12:37,960
I've come to,
uh, um, um...
315
00:12:37,995 --> 00:12:38,927
Install cable?
316
00:12:38,963 --> 00:12:39,962
Snake my drain?
317
00:12:39,997 --> 00:12:41,029
Clean the chimney?
318
00:12:41,065 --> 00:12:43,065
Yes, clean the chimney.
319
00:12:43,100 --> 00:12:45,635
I'm a chimney, um...
320
00:12:45,670 --> 00:12:47,002
You're a chimney sweep.
321
00:12:47,037 --> 00:12:48,371
Oh, that's just grand.
322
00:12:48,406 --> 00:12:49,938
Like the guy in the movie.
323
00:12:49,974 --> 00:12:51,274
Do you sing and dance?
324
00:12:51,309 --> 00:12:53,409
That costs extra.
325
00:12:53,444 --> 00:12:54,744
It always does.
326
00:12:54,779 --> 00:12:55,944
Never mind.
327
00:13:01,118 --> 00:13:02,518
All clean.
328
00:13:02,553 --> 00:13:06,689
By the way,
where is your,
your...
329
00:13:06,724 --> 00:13:07,790
Bathroom?
330
00:13:07,825 --> 00:13:08,223
Duck collection?
331
00:13:08,259 --> 00:13:09,057
Son?
332
00:13:09,093 --> 00:13:10,493
Yes, your son.
333
00:13:10,528 --> 00:13:12,328
The genius.
334
00:13:12,363 --> 00:13:13,596
Well, Jimbo's at school.
335
00:13:13,631 --> 00:13:14,997
He does that during the day.
336
00:13:15,032 --> 00:13:16,332
Does he
have something
337
00:13:16,367 --> 00:13:18,801
he really cares about,
like, um, uh...
338
00:13:18,836 --> 00:13:19,835
A girl?
339
00:13:19,870 --> 00:13:20,603
Tennis racket?
340
00:13:20,638 --> 00:13:21,870
Different girl?
341
00:13:21,906 --> 00:13:22,571
Dog?
342
00:13:22,607 --> 00:13:23,406
He does have a dog.
343
00:13:23,441 --> 00:13:25,007
Oh, yes.
344
00:13:25,042 --> 00:13:26,875
Show me the, um...
345
00:13:26,911 --> 00:13:30,413
the furry, barky thing
you mentioned.
346
00:13:30,448 --> 00:13:31,580
That's Goddard.
347
00:13:31,616 --> 00:13:33,616
Yes, it is,
yes, it is.
348
00:13:33,651 --> 00:13:35,951
Jimmy made him
all by himself.
349
00:13:35,986 --> 00:13:38,354
He does eleven million
and four things
350
00:13:38,389 --> 00:13:40,389
except clean up after himself.
351
00:13:40,425 --> 00:13:41,691
That's my job.
352
00:13:41,726 --> 00:13:43,592
Kind of like
a hobby for me really.
353
00:13:43,628 --> 00:13:45,494
May I take him for a...
354
00:13:45,530 --> 00:13:46,595
Ice cream?
355
00:13:46,631 --> 00:13:48,331
Grand tour of Europe?
356
00:13:48,366 --> 00:13:49,298
Walking?
357
00:13:49,334 --> 00:13:50,566
Yes, the third one.
358
00:13:50,601 --> 00:13:53,001
We usually don't let
random chimney sweeps
359
00:13:53,037 --> 00:13:54,203
just walk in and...
360
00:13:54,238 --> 00:13:55,471
( sniffs )
361
00:13:55,506 --> 00:13:57,340
Well... good night.
362
00:13:57,375 --> 00:13:58,808
Mommy?
363
00:13:59,977 --> 00:14:02,578
( Goddard growls )
364
00:14:02,613 --> 00:14:05,080
( barking )
365
00:14:05,115 --> 00:14:06,114
( growling fiercely )
366
00:14:08,252 --> 00:14:09,352
( Goddard yelps )
367
00:14:09,387 --> 00:14:11,787
Do you guys think that,
you know,
368
00:14:11,823 --> 00:14:14,223
sometimes
in the right light
369
00:14:14,258 --> 00:14:16,258
Miss Fowl
looks kind of...
370
00:14:16,293 --> 00:14:17,593
Hey, hold
that thought.
371
00:14:17,628 --> 00:14:19,362
Look-- up in the sky.
372
00:14:19,397 --> 00:14:20,429
It's a bird!
373
00:14:20,465 --> 00:14:21,630
It's a plane!
374
00:14:21,666 --> 00:14:23,599
It's a self-propelled android
375
00:14:23,634 --> 00:14:26,101
traveling at approximately
237 miles per hour.
376
00:14:26,136 --> 00:14:27,269
Oh... sorry, Carl.
377
00:14:27,304 --> 00:14:28,537
What were
you saying?
378
00:14:28,573 --> 00:14:30,539
Nothing,
never mind.
379
00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:33,743
Hey, Goddard, I'm home.
380
00:14:33,778 --> 00:14:35,644
Goddard!
381
00:14:35,680 --> 00:14:36,879
Dad?
382
00:14:36,914 --> 00:14:38,247
( yawns )
383
00:14:38,282 --> 00:14:42,217
I must have just dozed off there
for... hmm, six hours.
384
00:14:42,253 --> 00:14:44,086
Nothing like a nice nap.
385
00:14:44,121 --> 00:14:45,521
Where's Goddard?
386
00:14:45,556 --> 00:14:46,856
Uh, Goddard?
387
00:14:46,891 --> 00:14:48,891
He's right here with
the chimney sweep.
388
00:14:51,328 --> 00:14:53,596
JIMMY:
Goddard's been dog-napped.
389
00:14:53,631 --> 00:14:56,131
By a big, giant,
scary chimney sweep.
390
00:14:56,166 --> 00:15:00,068
Man, that would make
one sweet action figure.
391
00:15:00,104 --> 00:15:02,538
Nobody steals my dog.
392
00:15:02,573 --> 00:15:04,440
Except that guy.
393
00:15:04,475 --> 00:15:05,941
Sorry.
394
00:15:08,679 --> 00:15:11,814
I've got your dog, Jimmy.
395
00:15:11,849 --> 00:15:14,917
Which means soon I will have you
396
00:15:14,952 --> 00:15:21,223
or my name isn't...
um... oh, um...
397
00:15:21,258 --> 00:15:22,625
Oh, right.
398
00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:27,262
( laughs evilly )
399
00:15:29,066 --> 00:15:30,165
I'll take to the skies.
400
00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:32,802
Keep on the lookout
for any suspicious activity
401
00:15:32,837 --> 00:15:34,670
and meet me back here
at 1600 hours.
402
00:15:34,705 --> 00:15:36,439
I'm counting on you guys.
403
00:15:36,474 --> 00:15:37,807
( tires squeal )
404
00:15:37,842 --> 00:15:39,608
It's too bad
Goddard was stolen.
405
00:15:39,644 --> 00:15:40,976
But this
is so cool.
406
00:15:41,011 --> 00:15:43,813
We're like two real
live cops on a case.
407
00:15:43,848 --> 00:15:45,314
Yeah.
408
00:15:45,349 --> 00:15:47,049
Let's go eat.
409
00:15:49,821 --> 00:15:52,655
By activating Goddard's
built-in homing device,
410
00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:55,190
I'll find him faster
than you can say...
411
00:15:55,225 --> 00:15:56,325
( device beeping )
412
00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:57,359
There he is.
413
00:16:02,967 --> 00:16:05,400
He's under the house somewhere.
414
00:16:05,436 --> 00:16:08,270
Sheen, Carl,
I've located Goddard.
415
00:16:08,305 --> 00:16:10,439
I'll signal
if I need backup.
416
00:16:10,475 --> 00:16:11,507
Roger.
417
00:16:11,542 --> 00:16:13,609
We'll sit tight here
in case the guy
418
00:16:13,644 --> 00:16:15,978
who stole your dog
comes in for a snack.
419
00:16:16,013 --> 00:16:17,045
Over and out.
420
00:16:17,081 --> 00:16:18,781
Who's Roger?
421
00:16:19,650 --> 00:16:22,217
( barking from down below )
422
00:16:22,252 --> 00:16:23,251
Goddard.
423
00:16:23,287 --> 00:16:24,720
Up here, boy.
424
00:16:24,755 --> 00:16:26,922
Aw, don't worry, Goddard.
425
00:16:26,958 --> 00:16:29,959
I'll have you out
of there in no time.
426
00:16:29,994 --> 00:16:33,161
Good thing I brought
my Swiss Army laser.
427
00:16:35,633 --> 00:16:36,732
Let's go.
428
00:16:36,767 --> 00:16:38,300
( barks happily )
429
00:16:47,478 --> 00:16:50,379
Hello, Jimmy.
430
00:16:50,414 --> 00:16:53,348
Please allow me
to introduce myself.
431
00:16:53,384 --> 00:16:57,520
I'm... um... um...
432
00:16:57,555 --> 00:17:00,589
Um... no... uh...
433
00:17:00,625 --> 00:17:02,625
( mumbling incoherently )
434
00:17:02,660 --> 00:17:03,993
Finbarr Calamitous--
435
00:17:04,028 --> 00:17:06,461
the guy who could
never finish anything.
436
00:17:06,497 --> 00:17:09,398
Well, aren't we the smart one.
437
00:17:09,433 --> 00:17:15,137
But not smart enough to avoid
walking right into my little...
438
00:17:15,172 --> 00:17:16,371
It starts with a T.
439
00:17:16,407 --> 00:17:17,072
Trap?
440
00:17:17,107 --> 00:17:18,707
Correct!
441
00:17:18,743 --> 00:17:22,344
And now you are going to be
my scientific slave
442
00:17:22,379 --> 00:17:26,148
and finish all my... my...
443
00:17:26,183 --> 00:17:27,149
JIMMY:
Sentences.
444
00:17:27,184 --> 00:17:28,383
CALAMITOUS:
No!
445
00:17:28,419 --> 00:17:29,752
My... my...
446
00:17:29,787 --> 00:17:31,020
Inventions?
447
00:17:31,055 --> 00:17:32,220
Inventions.
448
00:17:32,256 --> 00:17:33,756
Finish my inventions.
449
00:17:33,791 --> 00:17:39,161
And then I will take over
the... um... uh...
450
00:17:39,196 --> 00:17:39,628
Universe?
451
00:17:39,664 --> 00:17:40,629
Smaller.
452
00:17:40,665 --> 00:17:41,997
Retroville?
453
00:17:42,033 --> 00:17:45,034
And all those fools
who laughed at me.
454
00:17:45,069 --> 00:17:48,938
They called me "Half Done"
and "Never Finish,"
455
00:17:48,973 --> 00:17:50,906
which weren't
particularly good nicknames,
456
00:17:50,942 --> 00:17:52,575
but they stung all the same.
457
00:17:52,610 --> 00:17:53,876
Wait a minute.
458
00:17:53,911 --> 00:17:55,878
If you never finish anything,
459
00:17:55,913 --> 00:17:58,380
how'd you finish
that robotic suit?
460
00:17:58,415 --> 00:18:00,415
Who says it's finished?
461
00:18:00,451 --> 00:18:02,517
I never put in a bathroom.
462
00:18:02,553 --> 00:18:05,187
Speaking of which,
I'll be right back.
463
00:18:12,863 --> 00:18:15,764
Pay no attention to
the short, skinny, bald man
464
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:17,700
stepping out of the, um...
465
00:18:17,735 --> 00:18:20,903
I'm not helping you do anything,
Mr. Calamitous.
466
00:18:20,938 --> 00:18:23,572
That's Professor Calamitous.
467
00:18:23,608 --> 00:18:26,441
And I'm afraid
you have no choice.
468
00:18:26,477 --> 00:18:28,110
You're trapped, Neutron.
469
00:18:28,145 --> 00:18:32,781
You see, these walls are
made of pure chromium steel
470
00:18:32,817 --> 00:18:35,084
with just a hint
of magenta in the piping
471
00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:37,486
to really bring out...
oh, never mind.
472
00:18:37,521 --> 00:18:42,157
First you will complete
my ultimate disintegrater.
473
00:18:42,192 --> 00:18:45,861
At the moment it only
makes things moist and soggy
474
00:18:45,896 --> 00:18:48,497
and kind of,
oh... not crumbly exactly.
475
00:18:48,532 --> 00:18:49,798
More like, um...
476
00:18:49,834 --> 00:18:52,635
Ultimate disintegrater, eh?
477
00:18:52,670 --> 00:18:54,937
Okay, I guess you win.
478
00:18:54,972 --> 00:18:58,007
I'll fix your machine and help
you take over Retroville.
479
00:18:58,042 --> 00:18:59,407
( questioning bark )
480
00:18:59,443 --> 00:19:00,575
CALAMITOUS:
Really?
481
00:19:00,611 --> 00:19:02,177
A wise decision.
482
00:19:02,212 --> 00:19:05,648
By the way,
how is my old teacher,
Miss, um... um...
483
00:19:05,683 --> 00:19:07,016
Miss Fowl?
484
00:19:07,051 --> 00:19:08,717
Why, she's fine,
thanks for asking.
485
00:19:08,753 --> 00:19:11,153
Do you think
that sometimes
in the right light
486
00:19:11,188 --> 00:19:12,855
Miss Fowl looks
kind of...
487
00:19:12,890 --> 00:19:13,922
Finished.
488
00:19:13,958 --> 00:19:16,659
Fast as you are smart, eh?
489
00:19:16,694 --> 00:19:19,795
So now begins
the destruction of, of...
490
00:19:19,830 --> 00:19:22,397
Your wall of steel.
491
00:19:27,437 --> 00:19:29,038
CALAMITOUS:
It works.
492
00:19:29,073 --> 00:19:32,741
I always knew
I could do, um... um...
493
00:19:32,777 --> 00:19:33,809
JIMMY:
It!
494
00:19:33,844 --> 00:19:35,177
Bye.
495
00:19:35,212 --> 00:19:36,912
Oh, pooh.
496
00:19:36,947 --> 00:19:39,548
I wish I'd seen that,
um... um...
497
00:19:39,583 --> 00:19:41,216
JIMMY:
Coming!
498
00:19:49,794 --> 00:19:51,326
Yikes!
499
00:19:51,361 --> 00:19:53,962
For a bumbling genius,
he's pretty dangerous.
500
00:19:53,998 --> 00:19:55,397
( tires squeal )
501
00:20:05,409 --> 00:20:08,010
He's on our tail.
502
00:20:28,332 --> 00:20:30,866
JIMMY:
Ugh, I can't shake him.
503
00:20:30,901 --> 00:20:34,302
So I never finish anything, eh?
504
00:20:34,338 --> 00:20:37,672
We'll just see about,
um... um...
505
00:20:37,708 --> 00:20:39,541
Think, think.
506
00:20:46,183 --> 00:20:48,984
CALAMITOUS:
I never put in a bathroom.
507
00:20:49,019 --> 00:20:50,619
Brain blast!
508
00:20:58,695 --> 00:21:00,395
( mumbling to himself )
509
00:21:03,768 --> 00:21:06,135
Ohh... oh, goodness.
510
00:21:09,140 --> 00:21:11,173
Oh, monkey lumps.
511
00:21:11,208 --> 00:21:15,077
Why didn't I put a bathroom
in this suit?
512
00:21:21,018 --> 00:21:22,417
Ooh, Sheen.
513
00:21:22,452 --> 00:21:23,718
It's the perp.
514
00:21:23,754 --> 00:21:25,120
Hey, yeah.
515
00:21:25,156 --> 00:21:26,922
You wrestle him
and cuff him
516
00:21:26,957 --> 00:21:28,223
and I'll watch.
517
00:21:28,259 --> 00:21:30,125
Why do you
get to watch?
518
00:21:30,161 --> 00:21:31,660
Fine, forget it.
519
00:21:31,695 --> 00:21:33,495
Let's just hide
quietly.
520
00:21:34,999 --> 00:21:37,465
May I use your,
um... um...
521
00:21:37,501 --> 00:21:38,667
Telephone?
522
00:21:38,702 --> 00:21:39,634
Teeth whitening kit?
523
00:21:39,670 --> 00:21:40,435
Restroom?
524
00:21:40,470 --> 00:21:41,403
Restroom!
525
00:21:41,438 --> 00:21:43,438
No, it's for
paying customers only.
526
00:21:43,473 --> 00:21:46,608
All right, I'll have
a chocolate, um... um...
527
00:21:46,643 --> 00:21:47,676
Sundae?
528
00:21:47,711 --> 00:21:48,610
Rumball?
529
00:21:48,645 --> 00:21:50,012
Milkshake?
530
00:21:50,047 --> 00:21:53,015
Officer Tubbs,
man that bathroom.
531
00:21:53,050 --> 00:21:56,151
Uh, thanks--
don't mind if I do.
532
00:21:58,588 --> 00:22:00,355
( groaning )
533
00:22:06,396 --> 00:22:07,462
Hmph!
534
00:22:08,398 --> 00:22:09,832
Nooooo!
535
00:22:15,405 --> 00:22:18,907
Yeah, another evildoer
sent packing.
536
00:22:18,943 --> 00:22:20,775
Glad we could help, Jimmy.
537
00:22:20,811 --> 00:22:22,144
What are you
talking about?
538
00:22:22,179 --> 00:22:24,079
You guys didn't do
a doggone thing.
539
00:22:24,114 --> 00:22:25,547
Oh, didn't we?
540
00:22:25,582 --> 00:22:27,182
JIMMY:
No!
541
00:22:27,218 --> 00:22:29,318
Well, at least we didn't
screw anything up.
542
00:22:29,353 --> 00:22:31,220
Come on, Carl,
let's go eat some candy.
543
00:22:31,255 --> 00:22:34,223
Fighting crime
really gives me
a appetite.
544
00:22:34,258 --> 00:22:37,492
CALAMITOUS:
I'll be back, Jimmy.
545
00:22:37,527 --> 00:22:41,163
You can run,
but you can't, um... oh...
546
00:22:41,198 --> 00:22:42,430
Oh, oh, oh-- hop?
547
00:22:42,466 --> 00:22:44,233
Go too fast or you'll slip?
548
00:22:44,268 --> 00:22:45,700
Chew gum at the same time?
549
00:22:45,736 --> 00:22:47,802
Oh, just forget it.
550
00:22:51,342 --> 00:22:55,210
Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
551
00:22:55,246 --> 00:22:57,746
and MTV TELEVISION NETWORKS
552
00:22:57,781 --> 00:23:02,217
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org