1
00:00:00,654 --> 00:00:02,120
( barks )
2
00:00:02,155 --> 00:00:03,255
( yells )
3
00:00:04,424 --> 00:00:06,991
Captioning sponsored
by NICKELODEON
4
00:00:18,138 --> 00:00:19,170
( people screaming )
5
00:00:19,205 --> 00:00:21,072
Heavens to
Harvey Fierstein!
6
00:00:21,107 --> 00:00:23,040
This isn't
the Pomona bypass.
7
00:00:23,076 --> 00:00:24,208
Willoughby, you dink!
8
00:00:24,244 --> 00:00:26,411
I told you turn left
a the Pants Outlet!
9
00:00:27,914 --> 00:00:29,381
I'm frightened and nauseated.
10
00:00:29,416 --> 00:00:30,415
Where are we?
11
00:00:30,450 --> 00:00:31,916
We're in hyperspace,
12
00:00:31,951 --> 00:00:34,286
where no teacher
has gone before.
13
00:00:34,321 --> 00:00:35,620
( squawks )
14
00:00:35,656 --> 00:00:39,658
MISS FOWL:
I've got a good idea
who's responsible for this!
15
00:00:39,693 --> 00:00:41,660
( kids cheering and whooping )
16
00:00:41,695 --> 00:00:46,030
Friends, students, kids:
lend me your ears!
17
00:00:46,065 --> 00:00:47,265
You may have noticed
18
00:00:47,301 --> 00:00:49,768
that Miss Fowl isn't here
this morning.
19
00:00:49,803 --> 00:00:52,837
Shouldn't they have returned
from Learnerpalooza by now?
20
00:00:52,872 --> 00:00:54,406
Thanks to my new hyper-chip,
21
00:00:54,441 --> 00:00:57,375
none of our teachers
will be back for an entire week.
22
00:00:57,411 --> 00:00:58,576
( wild cheering )
23
00:00:58,612 --> 00:01:01,245
Let's watch llama videos!
24
00:01:01,281 --> 00:01:03,181
( cheering stops abruptly )
25
00:01:03,216 --> 00:01:04,215
( cheering )
26
00:01:04,250 --> 00:01:05,850
Let's party!
27
00:01:05,885 --> 00:01:07,018
( party music playing )
28
00:01:07,053 --> 00:01:08,152
Festival! Festival!
29
00:01:08,188 --> 00:01:09,354
( laughing crazily )
30
00:01:09,389 --> 00:01:11,356
( cheering, laughter )
31
00:01:11,391 --> 00:01:14,025
Neutron, what did you do
to our teachers?
32
00:01:14,060 --> 00:01:15,293
All I did was send them
33
00:01:15,329 --> 00:01:17,562
on a little side trip
through hyperspace.
34
00:01:17,597 --> 00:01:20,699
They'll be back in a week,
safe and sound.
35
00:01:20,734 --> 00:01:23,802
BOTH:
♪ No teachers!
No teachers! No teachers! ♪
36
00:01:23,837 --> 00:01:26,404
Spread the word, people--
school's out!
37
00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:28,840
( shouting and whooping )
38
00:01:28,875 --> 00:01:30,775
I'm king of the world!
39
00:01:35,048 --> 00:01:37,148
JIMMY:
Coming through! Watch it!
40
00:01:37,183 --> 00:01:40,618
Hey, what's wrong
with my rocket board?
41
00:01:40,654 --> 00:01:41,986
( wailing )
42
00:01:43,122 --> 00:01:44,055
Mom?
43
00:01:44,090 --> 00:01:46,391
You are so grounded,
mister!
44
00:01:46,426 --> 00:01:47,625
She's right, Jimbo.
45
00:01:47,661 --> 00:01:50,628
I'm afraid your
senseless reign
of carnage is over.
46
00:01:50,664 --> 00:01:52,330
CARL:
Hi, Jimmy.
47
00:01:52,366 --> 00:01:55,533
You said to spread the word,
so I told our parents.
48
00:01:55,569 --> 00:01:56,768
Aw!
49
00:01:56,803 --> 00:02:00,004
You bring your teachers back
this instant!
50
00:02:00,039 --> 00:02:01,005
I-I can't!
51
00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:03,074
They're programmed
to come back in a week.
52
00:02:03,109 --> 00:02:06,644
Then we will have to
round these children
up ourselves.
53
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,680
MAN ( kindly ):
Kids! Oh, kids?
54
00:02:08,715 --> 00:02:10,615
Allow me, hon.
55
00:02:10,650 --> 00:02:12,684
Quiet...!
56
00:02:12,719 --> 00:02:15,086
( music stops,
kids fall silent )
57
00:02:15,121 --> 00:02:16,120
JUDY:
Children--
58
00:02:16,155 --> 00:02:17,922
please go to your classrooms.
59
00:02:17,957 --> 00:02:20,224
Until Miss Fowl
and the others return,
60
00:02:20,260 --> 00:02:23,495
we parents will be filling in
as substitute teachers.
61
00:02:23,530 --> 00:02:26,030
( all groaning and complaining )
62
00:02:26,065 --> 00:02:27,532
Substitute teachers?
63
00:02:27,567 --> 00:02:28,666
Good idea, Judy.
64
00:02:28,702 --> 00:02:31,903
The kids shouldn't miss
one precious day of education.
65
00:02:31,938 --> 00:02:33,638
Mom, Dad, you can't do this!
66
00:02:33,673 --> 00:02:35,507
It'll be totally embarrassing.
67
00:02:35,542 --> 00:02:36,841
Don't be silly, Jimbo.
68
00:02:36,877 --> 00:02:39,977
Your mother would never dream
of embarrassing you.
69
00:02:40,013 --> 00:02:41,379
No... don't!
70
00:02:41,415 --> 00:02:42,614
Yuck!
71
00:02:42,649 --> 00:02:46,618
Now, now, we don't want to be
a Mr. Smudgey-face, do we?
72
00:02:46,653 --> 00:02:48,319
( all laughing )
73
00:02:48,354 --> 00:02:49,621
"Mr. Smudgey-face!"
74
00:02:49,656 --> 00:02:52,424
Talk about being stripped
of all dignity!
75
00:02:52,459 --> 00:02:53,958
JUDY:
Your turn, Butch.
76
00:02:53,993 --> 00:02:55,760
( spitting
into handkerchief )
77
00:02:55,796 --> 00:02:56,828
I've lived too long.
78
00:02:56,863 --> 00:02:58,129
I'm next!
79
00:02:58,164 --> 00:02:59,431
Again.
80
00:02:59,466 --> 00:03:02,099
Oh, this couldn't get
more humiliating.
81
00:03:02,135 --> 00:03:05,503
Before we go on, let's look
at Jimmy's baby pictures.
82
00:03:06,706 --> 00:03:11,876
( students laughing, jeering )
83
00:03:11,912 --> 00:03:14,579
Now, kids, as Carl is
now demonstrating,
84
00:03:14,614 --> 00:03:17,014
germ-free back skin
begins at home.
85
00:03:17,050 --> 00:03:17,982
Harder, son!
86
00:03:18,017 --> 00:03:20,184
You show those germs
who's boss!
87
00:03:20,219 --> 00:03:21,319
CINDY:
Hey, Carl!
88
00:03:21,354 --> 00:03:23,521
Can you come over
and wash my parents?
89
00:03:23,557 --> 00:03:24,689
( all laughing )
90
00:03:24,724 --> 00:03:25,824
Now, now, kids.
91
00:03:25,859 --> 00:03:28,292
My Carl knows that good health
and hygiene
92
00:03:28,328 --> 00:03:30,061
is nothing to be ashamed of.
93
00:03:30,096 --> 00:03:31,062
Right, son?
94
00:03:31,097 --> 00:03:32,096
Right, Dad.
95
00:03:32,131 --> 00:03:33,097
Great!
96
00:03:33,132 --> 00:03:34,098
Now let's show 'em
97
00:03:34,133 --> 00:03:35,333
how to lance a boil!
98
00:03:35,368 --> 00:03:38,470
( students exclaim in disgust )
99
00:03:38,505 --> 00:03:40,572
Remember, kids,
working with wood
100
00:03:40,607 --> 00:03:43,207
can be a great
family activity.
101
00:03:43,242 --> 00:03:44,742
My son Sheen and I
made these
102
00:03:44,778 --> 00:03:47,111
pretty dollies together
in our spare time.
103
00:03:47,146 --> 00:03:48,513
( all laughing )
104
00:03:48,548 --> 00:03:49,848
Dad, they're not dollies!
105
00:03:49,883 --> 00:03:51,516
They're action-play companions!
106
00:03:51,551 --> 00:03:53,050
Some nights, instead of TV,
107
00:03:53,086 --> 00:03:55,487
Sheen will pretend to be
the little girl doll
108
00:03:55,522 --> 00:03:57,421
and I'll be her magic
flying pony.
109
00:03:57,457 --> 00:03:59,491
( kids laughing )
110
00:03:59,526 --> 00:04:01,092
( father imitating
neighing )
111
00:04:01,127 --> 00:04:02,159
Don't be sad, Sheen.
112
00:04:02,195 --> 00:04:04,762
Let's fly away
to Happy Rainbow Mountain.
113
00:04:04,798 --> 00:04:06,063
( groans )
114
00:04:06,099 --> 00:04:07,064
( body thuds )
115
00:04:08,301 --> 00:04:10,167
Kids, the book my wife gave me
116
00:04:10,203 --> 00:04:13,204
says that gym class
should build self-esteem.
117
00:04:13,239 --> 00:04:15,339
Everyone turn around
and hug your neighbor.
118
00:04:15,375 --> 00:04:16,641
( groaning in disgust )
119
00:04:16,676 --> 00:04:19,143
Go on, Jimbo,
hug your little men-friends.
120
00:04:19,178 --> 00:04:21,613
Dad, I'm not hugging anyone.
121
00:04:21,648 --> 00:04:24,315
Don't make me blow this whistle,
young man.
122
00:04:24,350 --> 00:04:25,550
No!
No, not
the whistle!
123
00:04:25,585 --> 00:04:27,719
( shrill whistling )
124
00:04:27,754 --> 00:04:28,820
All right,
all right!
125
00:04:28,855 --> 00:04:29,954
( chirps whistle )
126
00:04:31,290 --> 00:04:32,957
( groaning in disgust )
127
00:04:32,993 --> 00:04:35,660
Okey dokey, let's move on
to the trust exercises.
128
00:04:35,695 --> 00:04:36,661
( whistle chirps )
129
00:04:39,699 --> 00:04:41,365
SHEEN:
Could our parents
130
00:04:41,401 --> 00:04:43,735
have embarrassed us more today?
131
00:04:43,770 --> 00:04:45,069
What's wrong, Carl?
132
00:04:45,104 --> 00:04:47,539
Is my seven-layer
soy mulch too tough?
133
00:04:47,574 --> 00:04:50,041
Let Mommy pre-chew it
for you.
134
00:04:50,076 --> 00:04:51,543
( chewing noisily )
135
00:04:51,578 --> 00:04:54,311
( chewing noisily,
food splats onto plate )
136
00:04:55,949 --> 00:04:56,948
( slurps )
137
00:04:56,983 --> 00:04:57,916
Mmm...
138
00:04:58,952 --> 00:05:00,084
( stomach rumbling )
139
00:05:00,119 --> 00:05:01,753
I mean, gross!
140
00:05:01,788 --> 00:05:03,521
You boys enjoy.
141
00:05:03,557 --> 00:05:05,489
I can't take it anymore!
142
00:05:05,525 --> 00:05:07,692
I actually wish
we had our teachers back.
143
00:05:07,727 --> 00:05:09,861
Are you going to finish
your soy mulch?
144
00:05:11,097 --> 00:05:14,498
Parents want to be
substitute teachers, huh?
145
00:05:14,534 --> 00:05:17,635
Well, I say it's time
to sink some subs.
146
00:05:21,140 --> 00:05:23,641
GRUBBER:
Elbow, elbow!
147
00:05:23,677 --> 00:05:25,376
Keep searching, everyone.
148
00:05:25,411 --> 00:05:29,047
We're looking for some type
of shiny blinky sciencey gizmo.
149
00:05:29,082 --> 00:05:31,315
Do they have restrooms
in hyperspace?
150
00:05:31,350 --> 00:05:33,918
GRUBBER:
I'm keeping any change I find!
151
00:05:33,954 --> 00:05:35,920
JIMMY:
Almost done, Goddard.
152
00:05:35,956 --> 00:05:37,121
The secret weapon
153
00:05:37,156 --> 00:05:40,224
that'll make our parents run
screaming from the school.
154
00:05:40,259 --> 00:05:41,492
I call it "Rebellion."
155
00:05:41,527 --> 00:05:43,094
It's a concentrated version
156
00:05:43,129 --> 00:05:45,964
of the hormone that makes kids
challenge authority.
157
00:05:45,999 --> 00:05:48,099
One whiff of this
and they'll run amok.
158
00:05:48,134 --> 00:05:50,201
Faced with such
sheer raw mayhem,
159
00:05:50,236 --> 00:05:52,136
the parents will be forced
to bail.
160
00:05:52,171 --> 00:05:53,337
( smacks kiss )
161
00:05:56,776 --> 00:05:58,142
SHEEN:
Psst.
162
00:05:58,177 --> 00:05:59,110
Psst-psst!
163
00:05:59,145 --> 00:06:01,245
SHEEN ( muffled ):
Jimmy.
164
00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:03,214
Carl and I have decided to
run away
165
00:06:03,249 --> 00:06:05,316
and join the carney circuit.
You in?
166
00:06:05,351 --> 00:06:06,317
You won't need to.
167
00:06:06,352 --> 00:06:08,686
I've got the answer
to our problems.
168
00:06:08,722 --> 00:06:09,687
JUDY:
Jimmy!
169
00:06:09,723 --> 00:06:10,722
CARL AND SHEEN:
Ow!
170
00:06:10,757 --> 00:06:11,723
What have you got?
171
00:06:11,758 --> 00:06:13,357
( gulps ) Uh-oh.
172
00:06:13,392 --> 00:06:15,493
Is that one of
your experiments?
173
00:06:15,528 --> 00:06:16,427
Bring it up.
174
00:06:16,462 --> 00:06:19,163
( students taunting Jimmy )
175
00:06:19,198 --> 00:06:21,398
You know you're
grounded from
doing science.
176
00:06:21,434 --> 00:06:22,399
B-but Mom...
177
00:06:22,435 --> 00:06:23,501
No buts!
178
00:06:23,536 --> 00:06:25,603
You march off
to your next class.
179
00:06:25,639 --> 00:06:28,006
I'm going to keep this
in a safe place.
180
00:06:29,142 --> 00:06:30,608
( slurping )
181
00:06:30,644 --> 00:06:33,645
Neutron, this coffee you made
is absolutely delicious!
182
00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:35,312
Thanks, but my secret ingredient
183
00:06:35,348 --> 00:06:37,381
is the low-cal sweetener
Judy brought.
184
00:06:37,416 --> 00:06:39,383
Hugh, that's not
low-cal sweetener!
185
00:06:39,418 --> 00:06:42,219
That's the bottle I took
from Jimmy this morning!
186
00:06:42,255 --> 00:06:44,455
Well, it tastes marvelous.
187
00:06:44,490 --> 00:06:46,891
Sí, so robusto.
188
00:06:46,926 --> 00:06:49,727
Oh... dear.
189
00:06:49,763 --> 00:06:52,797
Guys, we've got to get back
that hormone bottle.
190
00:06:52,832 --> 00:06:54,999
It could be highly toxic
to adults.
191
00:06:55,035 --> 00:06:56,868
( parents whooping
and shouting )
192
00:06:58,104 --> 00:07:00,304
I'm sick of all the rules
around here, man!
193
00:07:00,339 --> 00:07:02,206
This place is totally bogus!
194
00:07:02,241 --> 00:07:04,375
I told you not to come
into my room!
195
00:07:04,410 --> 00:07:05,342
Whatever!
196
00:07:05,378 --> 00:07:07,111
You are not
the boss of me!
197
00:07:07,147 --> 00:07:09,681
Oh, no! They've been exposed
to the hormone.
198
00:07:09,716 --> 00:07:11,582
Guys, try to calm
your parents down.
199
00:07:15,155 --> 00:07:16,854
KID:
Ow...!
200
00:07:16,890 --> 00:07:17,989
Stop!
201
00:07:18,024 --> 00:07:18,990
( kids whining )
202
00:07:19,025 --> 00:07:20,692
JIMMY:
Mom, Dad!
203
00:07:20,727 --> 00:07:23,194
Stop shooting those spitballs
right now!
204
00:07:23,229 --> 00:07:24,796
Who's going to
make us?
205
00:07:24,831 --> 00:07:25,797
You?
206
00:07:25,832 --> 00:07:26,764
As if!
207
00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:27,699
Ah! No!
208
00:07:27,734 --> 00:07:28,733
Hey, don't!
209
00:07:28,768 --> 00:07:29,934
MAN:
Give me that!
210
00:07:29,969 --> 00:07:31,035
Dad, stop!
211
00:07:31,071 --> 00:07:33,104
You just can't take
people's stuff.
212
00:07:33,139 --> 00:07:35,573
You're about to get served,
chumps!
213
00:07:35,608 --> 00:07:37,975
( lively polka playing )
214
00:07:38,011 --> 00:07:39,610
( screaming, shouting in pain )
215
00:07:49,689 --> 00:07:51,089
Dad, I'm warning you!
216
00:07:51,124 --> 00:07:52,123
Behave yourself!
217
00:07:52,158 --> 00:07:54,291
You can't tell me what to do!
218
00:07:54,327 --> 00:07:57,394
Stop trying
to ruin my life!
219
00:07:57,430 --> 00:07:59,764
( motorcycle roaring )
220
00:08:01,067 --> 00:08:02,566
GRUBBER:
Ow! The elbow!
221
00:08:02,602 --> 00:08:03,667
It's no use.
222
00:08:03,703 --> 00:08:05,036
We've looked everywhere.
223
00:08:05,071 --> 00:08:06,037
( sniffing )
224
00:08:06,072 --> 00:08:07,939
Ooh, and it's getting musty
in here.
225
00:08:07,974 --> 00:08:09,907
Coach Grubber,
could you grab
226
00:08:09,943 --> 00:08:11,843
a fresh stick
of pine scent
227
00:08:11,878 --> 00:08:13,177
from the glove
compartment?
228
00:08:13,213 --> 00:08:15,346
GRUBBER:
Hey, what the heck is this?
229
00:08:15,381 --> 00:08:17,314
One of Jimmy's gadgets.
230
00:08:17,350 --> 00:08:19,016
I knew we'd find it.
231
00:08:19,052 --> 00:08:21,452
What happens if you press
this button?
232
00:08:21,487 --> 00:08:25,356
( all shouting )
233
00:08:28,128 --> 00:08:29,393
Let's trash this place!
234
00:08:29,428 --> 00:08:30,394
( all cheering )
235
00:08:30,429 --> 00:08:31,428
ALL:
Food fight!
236
00:08:31,464 --> 00:08:32,563
Guys, stop!
237
00:08:32,598 --> 00:08:33,697
You've got to listen.
238
00:08:33,733 --> 00:08:36,033
You've been exposed
to a concentrated hormone.
239
00:08:36,069 --> 00:08:37,268
If you don't calm down,
240
00:08:37,303 --> 00:08:39,436
it could damage
your endocrine system.
241
00:08:39,472 --> 00:08:42,173
Hmm... what do
you think, Jude?
242
00:08:42,208 --> 00:08:43,141
Get him!
243
00:08:43,176 --> 00:08:44,275
( shouting angrily )
244
00:08:44,310 --> 00:08:45,442
Calm down, people.
245
00:08:45,478 --> 00:08:48,846
You don't want this on
your permanent record, do you?
246
00:08:50,917 --> 00:08:52,549
( tires screeching )
247
00:08:52,585 --> 00:08:54,051
( all gasp )
248
00:08:55,354 --> 00:08:56,287
( all gasp )
249
00:08:57,190 --> 00:08:58,256
( all gasp )
250
00:08:58,291 --> 00:09:00,357
Jimmy, I'd like a word with you.
251
00:09:00,393 --> 00:09:03,027
Guys, you've got to get
these parents under control.
252
00:09:03,062 --> 00:09:05,229
They're loopy and need
medical attention!
253
00:09:05,265 --> 00:09:06,998
You can't control us!
254
00:09:07,033 --> 00:09:09,466
No way-- you're totally lame!
255
00:09:09,502 --> 00:09:11,969
Parents rebelling
against teachers?
256
00:09:12,005 --> 00:09:13,737
Has the world gone mad?!
257
00:09:13,773 --> 00:09:16,107
Folks, I think someone needs
some discipline.
258
00:09:16,142 --> 00:09:19,010
Good thing I stocked up
on teaching aids--
259
00:09:19,045 --> 00:09:21,846
like these eraser nunchucks!
260
00:09:21,881 --> 00:09:23,647
( all shouting aggressively )
261
00:09:23,683 --> 00:09:25,917
( whooping )
262
00:09:25,952 --> 00:09:28,585
( coughing )
263
00:09:31,090 --> 00:09:33,825
And I'm glad I picked up
this crate of dodge balls!
264
00:09:33,860 --> 00:09:34,892
Look out!
265
00:09:34,928 --> 00:09:37,028
My new high-carb pancake recipe
266
00:09:37,063 --> 00:09:39,430
should make them slow
and lethargic.
267
00:09:39,465 --> 00:09:41,165
( batter splats )
268
00:09:41,201 --> 00:09:43,901
( snoring )
269
00:09:43,937 --> 00:09:45,236
How about you, old woman?
270
00:09:45,271 --> 00:09:47,138
What do you bring
to the party, hmm?
271
00:09:47,173 --> 00:09:50,975
Young man, in 74 years
of teaching,
272
00:09:51,010 --> 00:09:54,078
the only thing I've ever needed
273
00:09:54,113 --> 00:09:57,648
is my piercing
educator's skunk-eye!
274
00:09:57,683 --> 00:09:59,450
No, not the skunk-eye!
275
00:09:59,485 --> 00:10:00,918
Don't look at me!
276
00:10:00,954 --> 00:10:02,519
Back! Back, I say!
277
00:10:02,555 --> 00:10:04,455
( Hugh, other parents
complaining )
278
00:10:04,490 --> 00:10:05,689
( batter splatting )
279
00:10:08,194 --> 00:10:09,827
( dreamily ):
Bicycle...
280
00:10:09,863 --> 00:10:12,596
( all snoring )
281
00:10:12,631 --> 00:10:13,630
Great job, everyone.
282
00:10:13,666 --> 00:10:15,599
Our parents should be
back to normal
283
00:10:15,634 --> 00:10:17,101
just as soon
as they wake up.
284
00:10:17,136 --> 00:10:19,203
Thank heavens for that.
285
00:10:19,239 --> 00:10:21,172
As for you, young man,
286
00:10:21,207 --> 00:10:24,408
we found your little
hyperspace gizmo.
287
00:10:24,443 --> 00:10:25,977
It'll never happen again!
288
00:10:26,012 --> 00:10:28,379
In fact, I've learned
a valuable lesson
289
00:10:28,414 --> 00:10:31,615
about the importance
of our teaching professionals.
290
00:10:32,685 --> 00:10:35,253
You're still getting
900 days detention.
291
00:10:35,288 --> 00:10:37,088
And no soup
on Soup Tuesday!
292
00:10:37,123 --> 00:10:40,258
In fact, drop and give me 40,
maggot, right now!
293
00:10:40,293 --> 00:10:43,094
( straining ):
But... you're not...
294
00:10:43,129 --> 00:10:45,196
the boss... of me.
295
00:10:45,231 --> 00:10:46,630
Double-time,
Neutron!
296
00:11:01,414 --> 00:11:04,015
CINDY:
In the library,
Neutron's foot hit mine
297
00:11:04,050 --> 00:11:06,650
so I tapped his foot back
and he kicked mine again.
298
00:11:06,685 --> 00:11:08,119
I think we were playing footsie.
299
00:11:08,154 --> 00:11:09,220
Promise you won't tell.
300
00:11:09,255 --> 00:11:11,923
Of course-- you know how
I respect people's privacy.
301
00:11:11,958 --> 00:11:13,424
So what are the guys
doing now?
302
00:11:14,693 --> 00:11:17,161
Uh... they're up to something.
303
00:11:21,334 --> 00:11:22,499
( beeping )
304
00:11:28,674 --> 00:11:29,706
( news program theme music
plays )
305
00:11:29,742 --> 00:11:32,143
I'm locked onto the evening news
video feed.
306
00:11:37,116 --> 00:11:38,082
You're on!
307
00:11:39,718 --> 00:11:40,918
Yes, ( clears throat ).
308
00:11:40,954 --> 00:11:42,119
Hello.
309
00:11:42,155 --> 00:11:44,888
This just in-- I'm not wearing
pants under this desk.
310
00:11:44,924 --> 00:11:46,924
Repeat-- I'm not wearing pants.
311
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,126
Um, hi.
312
00:11:49,162 --> 00:11:51,829
Who wants to see my head
spin around?
313
00:11:51,864 --> 00:11:54,031
Whee!
314
00:11:54,067 --> 00:11:55,266
Well, that's odd.
315
00:11:55,301 --> 00:11:58,469
I don't remember
the weather lady being
quite so... hideous.
316
00:11:58,504 --> 00:12:02,306
Come on, anchorman,
spin your head with me.
317
00:12:02,342 --> 00:12:03,441
Whee!
318
00:12:03,476 --> 00:12:04,908
Whee!
319
00:12:04,944 --> 00:12:06,810
BOTH:
We're spinning our heads.
320
00:12:06,846 --> 00:12:08,545
( both laughing )
321
00:12:08,581 --> 00:12:10,948
( both laughing )
322
00:12:10,984 --> 00:12:12,383
( disgusted sigh )
323
00:12:12,418 --> 00:12:13,985
We're in a lot of trouble.
324
00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:15,953
( brakes screech )
325
00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:29,833
I'm going to make you boys
superstars!
326
00:12:29,869 --> 00:12:31,435
Huh?
Huh?
What?
327
00:12:31,471 --> 00:12:33,537
I saw your crazy news show.
328
00:12:33,572 --> 00:12:36,607
I want to produce a kid's
evening news starring you boys.
329
00:12:36,642 --> 00:12:37,574
Huh?
Huh?
330
00:12:37,610 --> 00:12:38,876
What?
331
00:12:38,911 --> 00:12:41,045
We don't know anything
about doing the news!
332
00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:42,946
That's what makes it
so crazy fresh!
333
00:12:42,982 --> 00:12:44,081
You are my anchorman.
334
00:12:44,117 --> 00:12:45,182
You will do sports.
335
00:12:45,218 --> 00:12:46,517
Round boy does weather.
336
00:12:46,552 --> 00:12:48,252
You're rewarding
these chowderheads
337
00:12:48,287 --> 00:12:49,487
for hacking into the news?!
338
00:12:49,522 --> 00:12:51,022
You can be co-anchor!
339
00:12:51,057 --> 00:12:52,056
I'm in.
340
00:12:52,091 --> 00:12:53,190
Can I do a gossip segment?
341
00:12:53,226 --> 00:12:54,758
Extra crazy!
342
00:12:54,793 --> 00:12:56,093
You all start tonight.
343
00:12:56,129 --> 00:12:57,094
Ciao.
344
00:12:58,464 --> 00:12:59,530
CARL:
What!
345
00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:05,136
ANNOUNCER:
Welcome to Kid's Evening News
with Jimmy Neutron
346
00:13:05,171 --> 00:13:06,570
and Cindy Vortex,
347
00:13:06,605 --> 00:13:07,804
Carl Wheezer on weather,
348
00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,373
Sheen Estevez on sports
349
00:13:09,409 --> 00:13:11,708
and Libby Folfax
with "The Word."
350
00:13:14,747 --> 00:13:15,779
Good evening.
351
00:13:15,814 --> 00:13:17,848
I'm Jimmy Neutron here now
with the news.
352
00:13:17,883 --> 00:13:19,550
Tragedy struck Retroville today
353
00:13:19,585 --> 00:13:22,686
as local boy Nick Dean broke his
leg for the 15th time this year.
354
00:13:22,721 --> 00:13:24,721
Nick is expected to make
a full recovery
355
00:13:24,757 --> 00:13:26,557
and break his leg again
soon after.
356
00:13:26,592 --> 00:13:27,558
Cindy?
357
00:13:27,593 --> 00:13:29,993
Foreign exchange student
Bolbi Stroganovsky
358
00:13:30,029 --> 00:13:33,164
officially entered the Miss
Retroville beauty pageant today.
359
00:13:33,199 --> 00:13:35,999
Asked to explain his action,
Mr. Stroganovsky replied:
360
00:13:36,035 --> 00:13:37,834
( imitating Bolbi ):
Bolbi pretty.
361
00:13:37,870 --> 00:13:39,236
Bolbi win pageant-- good.
362
00:13:39,272 --> 00:13:40,504
Jimmy?
363
00:13:40,540 --> 00:13:43,607
Butch Bukowski was today awarded
the Bully of the Year award
364
00:13:43,642 --> 00:13:45,676
from the Juvenile Delinquent
Society.
365
00:13:45,711 --> 00:13:48,446
In a tear-filled speech,
Bukowski accepted the award,
366
00:13:48,481 --> 00:13:51,482
then used it to beat his host
about the head, neck and chest.
367
00:13:51,517 --> 00:13:53,750
And now let's go
to the always jolly Dr. Carl
368
00:13:53,786 --> 00:13:55,352
in the Weather Center.
Carl?
369
00:13:55,388 --> 00:13:58,255
Hello, Retroville!
370
00:13:58,291 --> 00:14:01,024
I hope you had
a scrumpdili-icious day!
371
00:14:01,060 --> 00:14:03,160
Let's wish a big, old
"Happy Birthday"
372
00:14:03,196 --> 00:14:07,965
to Old Lady Nussbaum,
who turns 102 today.
373
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:11,902
Here's a nice, big Weather
Center hug from Dr. Carl.
374
00:14:11,937 --> 00:14:13,737
SHEEN:
Just tell us
the weather!
375
00:14:13,772 --> 00:14:14,805
( blows raspberry )
376
00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,741
Tomorrow's Wheezer Weather:
377
00:14:17,776 --> 00:14:21,312
you'd better grab your sombrero,
mi amigo,
378
00:14:21,347 --> 00:14:23,880
because it's going to be as hot
as Mexico.
379
00:14:23,916 --> 00:14:26,317
( to conga rhythm ):
♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da ♪
380
00:14:26,352 --> 00:14:27,985
♪ Da-da-da-da-da-duh ♪
381
00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:29,186
♪ Da-da-da-d... ♪
382
00:14:29,222 --> 00:14:31,655
Ow! My scapula!
383
00:14:31,690 --> 00:14:33,124
Thanks, Dr. Carl.
384
00:14:33,159 --> 00:14:34,891
Now here's Sheen
with the sports.
385
00:14:34,927 --> 00:14:36,093
Evening, sports fans.
386
00:14:36,129 --> 00:14:38,862
Today, Oleander and Ike faced
off against each other
387
00:14:38,897 --> 00:14:40,097
in varsity wrestling.
388
00:14:40,133 --> 00:14:41,432
Let's go to the videotape.
389
00:14:42,502 --> 00:14:43,900
Right, no videotape.
390
00:14:43,936 --> 00:14:45,802
Let's go to the action figures.
391
00:14:45,838 --> 00:14:47,771
Oleander puts Ike
in a half nelson,
392
00:14:47,806 --> 00:14:49,373
then Ike kicks him in the shins.
393
00:14:49,408 --> 00:14:50,508
Bam! Boom! Bam!
394
00:14:50,543 --> 00:14:53,477
I've never seen anyone take
this much punishment.
395
00:14:53,513 --> 00:14:55,479
Wait! Ike is burping
in Oleander's face.
396
00:14:55,515 --> 00:14:56,547
( Sheen burps )
397
00:14:56,582 --> 00:14:58,549
Oleander is passing out.
398
00:14:58,584 --> 00:15:00,151
Ike just might go all the way.
399
00:15:00,186 --> 00:15:02,353
( shouts )
400
00:15:02,388 --> 00:15:03,720
Now, here's Libby.
401
00:15:03,756 --> 00:15:04,688
Ow!
402
00:15:04,723 --> 00:15:05,722
( screams )
403
00:15:05,758 --> 00:15:06,957
What's up, y'all?
404
00:15:06,992 --> 00:15:08,992
This is Libby with "The Word."
405
00:15:09,028 --> 00:15:11,295
Well, it seems
a certain big-headed genius
406
00:15:11,330 --> 00:15:14,598
has been playing footsie in the
library with a blond colleague.
407
00:15:14,634 --> 00:15:16,833
Looks like
this love-hate relationship
408
00:15:16,869 --> 00:15:19,403
is turning into all love
all the time.
409
00:15:19,438 --> 00:15:20,437
Check it out.
410
00:15:20,473 --> 00:15:22,939
Everybody's talking
about a certain someone
411
00:15:22,975 --> 00:15:24,375
with the initials C.W.
412
00:15:24,410 --> 00:15:27,778
who had toilet paper hanging off
his shoe all day today.
413
00:15:29,215 --> 00:15:31,649
P.S. He still doesn't know.
414
00:15:31,684 --> 00:15:32,783
( Carl squeals )
415
00:15:32,818 --> 00:15:34,285
Check it out.
416
00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:35,653
( Carl screaming )
417
00:15:35,688 --> 00:15:38,889
( crash )
418
00:15:38,924 --> 00:15:41,392
What hyperactive cutie
has been worrying pals
419
00:15:41,427 --> 00:15:43,527
by talking to an imaginary
hand puppet?
420
00:15:43,563 --> 00:15:46,397
Here's a hint:
his name rhymes with "Bean."
421
00:15:50,536 --> 00:15:52,169
Well, I'm out of time.
422
00:15:52,205 --> 00:15:54,705
See you tomorrow on "The Word."
423
00:15:54,740 --> 00:15:56,207
G...
424
00:15:56,242 --> 00:15:58,242
Good night and thanks
for watching.
425
00:15:58,277 --> 00:15:59,243
MAN:
Cut.
426
00:15:59,278 --> 00:16:00,244
Libby!
427
00:16:00,279 --> 00:16:02,846
You just violated, like,
ten people's privacy.
428
00:16:02,881 --> 00:16:04,748
I thought you were down
with my gossip.
429
00:16:04,783 --> 00:16:06,083
Not when it's about me!
430
00:16:06,118 --> 00:16:06,983
Or me!
431
00:16:07,019 --> 00:16:08,319
BOTH:
Or us!
432
00:16:08,354 --> 00:16:09,320
Or me.
433
00:16:09,355 --> 00:16:10,821
What's the big deal?
434
00:16:10,856 --> 00:16:12,423
I didn't use actual names.
435
00:16:12,458 --> 00:16:15,259
I'm sure no one even knew
who I was talking about.
436
00:16:18,764 --> 00:16:21,131
Your foot's all out
of toilet paper!
437
00:16:22,535 --> 00:16:24,167
♪ Jimmy and Cindy ♪
438
00:16:24,203 --> 00:16:25,068
♪ Sittin'
in a... ♪
439
00:16:25,104 --> 00:16:26,136
( whack )
( thud )
440
00:16:26,171 --> 00:16:27,271
( gasping ):
Tree.
441
00:16:27,306 --> 00:16:28,138
BOY:
Sheen!
442
00:16:28,173 --> 00:16:30,608
How about our hand puppets
do lunch?
443
00:16:30,643 --> 00:16:33,711
( laughter )
444
00:16:33,746 --> 00:16:34,778
Wow!
445
00:16:34,813 --> 00:16:36,947
I'm a star.
446
00:16:36,982 --> 00:16:38,014
( kids conversing )
447
00:16:38,050 --> 00:16:39,750
GIRL:
You're kidding!
448
00:16:39,785 --> 00:16:41,285
Okay, children, quiet down.
449
00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:43,454
I'm going to hand back
your essays now.
450
00:16:44,557 --> 00:16:46,022
LIBBY:
A "C"?!
451
00:16:46,058 --> 00:16:48,191
Something wrong, Libby?
452
00:16:48,227 --> 00:16:52,563
No, Miss Fowl, but I hope you're
not grading and driving again.
453
00:16:52,598 --> 00:16:54,465
You don't want
to go back to prison.
454
00:16:54,500 --> 00:16:56,233
Those charges were never proven!
455
00:16:56,269 --> 00:16:58,535
Who told you about that?
456
00:16:58,571 --> 00:17:02,273
Though it would make
a good story for tonight.
457
00:17:02,308 --> 00:17:04,275
Did I write "C"?
458
00:17:04,310 --> 00:17:05,476
I meant "A".
459
00:17:05,511 --> 00:17:08,011
I always get those confused.
460
00:17:09,682 --> 00:17:11,848
LIBBY:
Marisa has hair extensions?
461
00:17:11,884 --> 00:17:13,183
Girl, how do you know?
462
00:17:13,218 --> 00:17:16,287
You'd better tell me unless you
want that ugly tattoo of yours
463
00:17:16,322 --> 00:17:17,821
splashed all over prime time.
464
00:17:17,856 --> 00:17:19,356
( phone beeps off )
465
00:17:19,392 --> 00:17:20,691
Talk to me.
466
00:17:20,726 --> 00:17:22,393
You call that embarrassing?!
467
00:17:22,428 --> 00:17:24,595
Call me when you get
some real dirt.
468
00:17:25,831 --> 00:17:27,097
Uh, where are
my cherries?!
469
00:17:27,132 --> 00:17:28,399
Or do you want
people to know
470
00:17:28,434 --> 00:17:31,368
that half your
chocolate sprinkles
are ants?
471
00:17:31,404 --> 00:17:32,936
The lady wants cherries!
472
00:17:32,971 --> 00:17:35,071
Come on, move, move,
move, move, move!
473
00:17:35,107 --> 00:17:37,874
She's turned into a monster.
474
00:17:37,910 --> 00:17:39,643
She has dirt
on everyone in town.
475
00:17:39,679 --> 00:17:40,911
So? What do we care?
476
00:17:40,946 --> 00:17:42,646
She already gossiped about us.
477
00:17:42,682 --> 00:17:44,715
We're on every night,
Coach Clueless.
478
00:17:44,750 --> 00:17:47,050
Do you think she won't
eventually report
479
00:17:47,085 --> 00:17:48,552
on your addiction
to candy?
480
00:17:57,463 --> 00:18:00,130
And I can only imagine
what she has on Carl.
481
00:18:00,165 --> 00:18:01,498
I don't sniff my own feet.
482
00:18:01,534 --> 00:18:05,101
It just looks that way
when I'm doing yoga.
483
00:18:05,137 --> 00:18:06,970
Thanks for
the stories, guys.
484
00:18:07,005 --> 00:18:08,806
Libby, what's happened to you?
485
00:18:08,841 --> 00:18:09,940
Look, I'll make a deal:
486
00:18:09,975 --> 00:18:12,209
stop your gossip segment
and I'll give you...
487
00:18:12,244 --> 00:18:13,477
Candy!
488
00:18:13,512 --> 00:18:14,945
No, Cindy's
co-anchor job.
489
00:18:14,980 --> 00:18:16,814
( exclaims )
Ouch.
490
00:18:16,849 --> 00:18:18,148
Excuse me.
491
00:18:18,183 --> 00:18:21,819
I've got to go-- I need more
juicy stories for tonight.
492
00:18:21,854 --> 00:18:23,320
Guys, I have
an idea.
493
00:18:23,356 --> 00:18:24,421
Does it involve candy?
494
00:18:24,457 --> 00:18:25,422
JIMMY:
No.
495
00:18:25,458 --> 00:18:26,923
Libby wants stories, right?
496
00:18:26,959 --> 00:18:29,493
Well, let's give her a story
she can't resist.
497
00:18:29,528 --> 00:18:31,895
LIBBY:
Ain't no way Miss Fowl's a man!
498
00:18:31,930 --> 00:18:33,096
( knocking on door )
499
00:18:33,131 --> 00:18:34,698
I've got to go,
Principal Willoughby.
500
00:18:34,734 --> 00:18:35,666
Come in.
501
00:18:35,701 --> 00:18:36,700
Hey, Lib.
502
00:18:36,736 --> 00:18:38,802
I wanted to wish you
a good show tonight.
503
00:18:38,838 --> 00:18:42,740
Oh, and even though our dressing
rooms are next to each other,
504
00:18:42,775 --> 00:18:45,709
don't look through
that peephole into mine.
505
00:18:45,745 --> 00:18:47,210
I'll try to resist, Carl.
506
00:18:47,246 --> 00:18:50,247
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm looking for one last story.
507
00:18:50,282 --> 00:18:52,649
Okay, well, you won't find
your story
508
00:18:52,685 --> 00:18:55,318
through that peephole,
that's for sure,
509
00:18:55,354 --> 00:18:58,321
although you will be
shocked and amazed
510
00:18:58,357 --> 00:19:00,190
and sickened
and disgusted
511
00:19:00,225 --> 00:19:02,125
and terrified!
512
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:03,360
Well, got to go.
513
00:19:28,053 --> 00:19:31,221
Greetings, mighty alien masters.
514
00:19:31,256 --> 00:19:32,890
Greetings,
Carl of Earth.
515
00:19:32,925 --> 00:19:35,726
Have you prepared
for our arrival?
516
00:19:35,761 --> 00:19:37,193
Yes, I have, masters.
517
00:19:37,229 --> 00:19:40,597
Have you laid in a supply
of kittens for us to snack on?
518
00:19:40,633 --> 00:19:41,732
Yes, I have, masters.
519
00:19:41,767 --> 00:19:42,933
( kittens mewling )
520
00:19:42,968 --> 00:19:44,067
Excellent.
521
00:19:44,102 --> 00:19:46,036
I knew he'd be
a good recipient
522
00:19:46,071 --> 00:19:48,972
for our slavery-inducing
brain worm.
523
00:19:49,007 --> 00:19:50,741
ALL:
Mm-mmm.
524
00:19:50,776 --> 00:19:53,143
ALIEN 3:
Soon we will descend
upon your planet
525
00:19:53,178 --> 00:19:55,111
and steal the spleens
of your species
526
00:19:55,147 --> 00:19:56,379
to play Spleen Ball with.
527
00:19:56,415 --> 00:19:58,348
Mm, Earth spleens
are so bouncy.
528
00:19:58,383 --> 00:20:00,216
It's like a whole different
game.
529
00:20:00,252 --> 00:20:02,385
ALL:
Mm-mmm.
530
00:20:02,421 --> 00:20:03,787
( whispering ):
Is that it?
531
00:20:03,823 --> 00:20:05,456
Oh, um... okay. Bye.
532
00:20:05,491 --> 00:20:06,790
( simulates farting )
533
00:20:06,826 --> 00:20:07,758
( all simulate farting )
534
00:20:07,793 --> 00:20:09,426
( farts loudly )
535
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,701
And then the aliens put a worm
in Carl's brain
536
00:20:17,736 --> 00:20:19,069
that makes him their slave.
537
00:20:19,104 --> 00:20:21,137
And they eat kittens,
and they're coming
538
00:20:21,173 --> 00:20:23,507
to steal our spleens
to play Spleen Ball with.
539
00:20:23,542 --> 00:20:25,208
I'm not kidding!
540
00:20:25,243 --> 00:20:28,011
Thanks for that fascinating
report, Libby.
541
00:20:28,046 --> 00:20:29,513
Well, that's the news.
542
00:20:29,548 --> 00:20:32,182
Good night and thanks
for watching.
543
00:20:32,217 --> 00:20:35,452
( all laughing )
544
00:20:35,488 --> 00:20:37,087
Oh, that was classic.
545
00:20:37,122 --> 00:20:38,956
( giggles ):
Earth spleens.
546
00:20:38,991 --> 00:20:41,492
No one's going to believe
Libby ever again.
547
00:20:41,527 --> 00:20:42,826
( laughing ):
Yeah.
548
00:20:42,862 --> 00:20:43,961
Except those guys.
549
00:20:43,996 --> 00:20:45,629
There's the alien
slave kid.
550
00:20:45,664 --> 00:20:46,597
Get him!
551
00:20:46,632 --> 00:20:47,631
( mob yelling )
552
00:20:47,666 --> 00:20:50,467
Threaten our kittens,
hey, buster?!
553
00:20:50,503 --> 00:20:53,036
Libby, you have to stop them
from hurting Carl.
554
00:20:53,071 --> 00:20:54,538
Yeah, he's not an alien.
555
00:20:54,573 --> 00:20:57,107
We made it all up so you'd lose
your credibility.
556
00:20:57,142 --> 00:20:58,041
What?!
557
00:20:58,076 --> 00:20:59,676
Oh, no!
558
00:20:59,712 --> 00:21:01,111
Okay, get ready to pelt him.
559
00:21:01,146 --> 00:21:02,613
Wait! Stop!
560
00:21:02,648 --> 00:21:04,180
Carl's not an alien.
561
00:21:04,216 --> 00:21:05,682
CROWD:
Huh?!
562
00:21:05,718 --> 00:21:06,683
CARL:
What?
563
00:21:06,719 --> 00:21:08,785
But it was on the local news!
564
00:21:08,821 --> 00:21:10,453
I know, but it wasn't true.
565
00:21:10,489 --> 00:21:12,389
Those guys tricked me
into saying it.
566
00:21:12,424 --> 00:21:14,357
( coughs )
( whistling )
567
00:21:14,393 --> 00:21:15,358
Oh.
568
00:21:15,394 --> 00:21:16,359
Then pelt them!
569
00:21:16,395 --> 00:21:17,427
CROWD:
Yeah!
570
00:21:17,462 --> 00:21:18,929
Wait! Stop!
571
00:21:18,964 --> 00:21:20,831
Don't pelt them, either.
572
00:21:20,866 --> 00:21:23,934
Look, I guess by getting
all caught up in being a star,
573
00:21:23,969 --> 00:21:26,537
I forced my friends
to do what they did.
574
00:21:26,572 --> 00:21:27,804
We forgive you,
Libby.
575
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:29,439
And I hope you'll
still trust us
576
00:21:29,474 --> 00:21:31,742
with the sacred dignity
of the local news.
577
00:21:31,777 --> 00:21:33,911
Not necessary,
because you are all fired!
578
00:21:33,946 --> 00:21:35,145
What?!
579
00:21:35,180 --> 00:21:37,915
That's right, I need to make
room for my crazy new show,
580
00:21:37,950 --> 00:21:39,816
Everybody Loves Hand Puppets.
581
00:21:39,852 --> 00:21:41,317
Hi, everybody.
582
00:21:41,353 --> 00:21:42,886
Yes.
583
00:21:42,922 --> 00:21:44,688
Pelt Corky!
584
00:21:44,723 --> 00:21:48,892
( crowd yelling )
585
00:21:48,928 --> 00:21:50,093
Forgive me, guys?
586
00:21:50,128 --> 00:21:51,327
Ah, what the heck.
587
00:21:51,363 --> 00:21:53,530
I guess things worked out okay
after all.
588
00:21:53,566 --> 00:21:55,732
Come on, let's go home.
589
00:21:57,436 --> 00:21:59,937
CARL:
Um... hello, guys.
590
00:21:59,972 --> 00:22:01,171
Wait up.
591
00:22:01,206 --> 00:22:04,107
Okay, you're
coming back, right?
592
00:22:04,142 --> 00:22:06,109
Right?
593
00:22:06,144 --> 00:22:07,878
Guys?
594
00:22:07,913 --> 00:22:09,746
My scapula.
595
00:22:11,450 --> 00:22:15,285
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
596
00:22:51,991 --> 00:22:53,356
MAN:
Paul?
597
00:22:54,927 --> 00:22:56,059
JIMMY:
Got to blast!