1
00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:29,797
I'm telling you,
it's impossible.

2
00:00:29,830 --> 00:00:31,632
I tried,
and this is what happened.

3
00:00:31,665 --> 00:00:33,867
That can't possibly explain
how you can chip a tooth

4
00:00:33,901 --> 00:00:35,436
while you're trying
to lick your elbow.

5
00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:38,038
Doh!
Oh, ah.

6
00:00:39,073 --> 00:00:42,110
Mr. Corneille,
your face! What happened?

7
00:00:42,143 --> 00:00:45,446
Pretty mama, handsome daddy.

8
00:00:45,479 --> 00:00:46,914
No, I meant
your black eye.

9
00:00:46,947 --> 00:00:48,616
Ha. You should see
the other guys.

10
00:00:48,649 --> 00:00:49,717
Hi, Mr Corneille.

11
00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:51,352
I-I cannot stress
strongly enough,

12
00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,553
these are not
the other guys.

13
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:53,954
What happened
to your face?

14
00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:56,257
Oh, I just walked into
the cage and got hurt.

15
00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:59,493
What?! You got into the cage,
like you're an MMMMA fighter?

16
00:00:59,527 --> 00:01:01,495
- I --
- Oh.

17
00:01:01,529 --> 00:01:02,830
-Hmm.
-What's that?

18
00:01:02,863 --> 00:01:05,133
"Meaty Man Misunderstanding
Martial Arts."

19
00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:09,203
Sounds kinda violent.
Pfff! Only according to the
so-called "medical community."

20
00:01:09,237 --> 00:01:10,738
Oh, Mr. Corneille.

21
00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:12,373
Who'd have thought
you'd be so --

22
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,275
Oh, that arm feels
a lot more withered

23
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:15,476
than I thought
it was gonna be.

24
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:16,810
Well, when you're fighting
in the cage,

25
00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:18,579
the most important muscle
is the heart.

26
00:01:18,612 --> 00:01:21,449
And right now,
you're giving mine a workout.

27
00:01:25,553 --> 00:01:27,388
Teach us.

28
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:28,689
I -- I don't know,
um --

29
00:01:28,722 --> 00:01:31,125
Te-e-e-e-ach us-s-s-s!

30
00:01:31,159 --> 00:01:34,362
The men who step into the cage
love what they do.

31
00:01:34,395 --> 00:01:36,997
And by stepping into it,
you're saying to your opponent,

32
00:01:37,030 --> 00:01:39,967
"I love you, and I'm gonna
punch you in the body

33
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:43,003
with my body with so much love
that you pass out."

34
00:01:43,036 --> 00:01:44,405
What? I thought
you were gonna teach us

35
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:45,873
how to become
tough fighter guys.

36
00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:48,442
But if you rearrange the letters
of "tough fighter guy"

37
00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,278
you get
"tighter of hug guy."

38
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:52,780
Coincidence?
Yes, but a useful one.

39
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:54,882
Come,
let's get started.

40
00:02:10,864 --> 00:02:13,634
I'm, uh, sorry to interrupt
whatever that is,

41
00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,436
but I'm afraid
I have some bad news.

42
00:02:15,469 --> 00:02:16,970
There have been
some budget cuts,

43
00:02:17,004 --> 00:02:19,273
and the school-board has agreed
to rent out half the school

44
00:02:19,307 --> 00:02:21,375
to another
"institution."

45
00:02:21,409 --> 00:02:22,876
So I'm afraid
you have to leave.

46
00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:24,678
Surely there was
a better solution.

47
00:02:24,712 --> 00:02:26,113
This is
our last resort.

48
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,482
We've already cut everything
we can from the budget.

49
00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:30,117
Look, those aren't even
real fire extinguishers.

50
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,085
They're just canisters
of Dippy String.

51
00:02:32,119 --> 00:02:33,721
If a fire starts
in this school,

52
00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:36,357
things are gonna get
very dippy --

53
00:02:36,390 --> 00:02:37,558
also pretty tragic.

54
00:02:37,591 --> 00:02:38,926
So you're just gonna
privatize the school

55
00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:40,160
like some kind
of prison?

56
00:02:40,194 --> 00:02:43,096
Funny you should say that.

57
00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:44,298
Don't worry.

58
00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:47,134
Just means one of your new
"classmates" has escaped.

59
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,836
We'll know if anything
really bad happens

60
00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:50,838
because the big siren
will go --

61
00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:57,611
What's happened to our school
is a disaster --

62
00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:59,313
the forced exercise,
the communal showers,

63
00:02:59,347 --> 00:03:02,015
the canteen slop, the unpaid
work, the abuse of power.

64
00:03:02,049 --> 00:03:03,951
And if that wasn't enough,
now with the prisoners

65
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:05,486
it's gonna be overcrowded,
too!

66
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:06,887
There must be
a solution.

67
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:09,523
Dah! Hmph!

68
00:03:09,557 --> 00:03:11,759
Ow!

69
00:03:14,161 --> 00:03:17,130
Wait. Maybe that poster is fate
hitting us right in the face

70
00:03:17,164 --> 00:03:19,132
with the answer
to our problem.

71
00:03:19,166 --> 00:03:21,602
"Hair Force Gone.
Full Body Waxing.

72
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:23,337
Tell us when to stop...
We won't listen!"

73
00:03:23,371 --> 00:03:27,074
No, I meant that one.
An MMMMA challenger fight!

74
00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:29,677
I'm sorry,
but I don't fight for money.

75
00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,679
Violence is never
the best solution.

76
00:03:31,712 --> 00:03:33,314
What about the nurse?

77
00:03:33,347 --> 00:03:35,483
She wouldn't even have a job
if people didn't get hurt.

78
00:03:35,516 --> 00:03:36,917
My alibi
is watertight,

79
00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:39,953
unlike that boat
the previous nurse was in.

80
00:03:41,522 --> 00:03:42,990
I mean, Mr Corneille,

81
00:03:43,023 --> 00:03:45,559
surely you'll fight
if it means saving the school?

82
00:03:45,593 --> 00:03:46,994
But to go back
into the cage,

83
00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:49,330
I'm gonna need
a whole support team.

84
00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:51,599
Even a medic.
- I'll patch you up.

85
00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:52,966
I meant
someone qualified,

86
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,568
someone who knows
how to use a scalpel.

87
00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:57,438
And, no, that doesn't mean you
either, Frank The Butcher!

88
00:03:58,872 --> 00:04:00,708
So what do you say,
Miss Markham?

89
00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,477
Please, Mr Corneille,
let's lose the formalities.

90
00:04:03,511 --> 00:04:05,879
My name is Joan.
-Mine is Moonchild.

91
00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:08,015
-I'll stick with Corneille.
-Fair enough.

92
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:10,718
-So you'll fight, then?
-Absolutely.

93
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,787
Time for
the weigh-in.

94
00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:28,636
On my right,
we have the reigning champion,

95
00:04:28,669 --> 00:04:32,039
Joao "The Grave" Diga!

96
00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:38,379
And on my left,
we have the challenger...

97
00:04:38,412 --> 00:04:39,713
What's his name,
kid?

98
00:04:39,747 --> 00:04:41,715
-Quick, we need a name.
-Oh, oh, I got it.

99
00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:43,050
The Frog Prince.

100
00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:45,919
Sounds like he's gonna get
kissed -- by a fist.

101
00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,988
The Croaker.
That's like
all he does is croak.

102
00:04:48,021 --> 00:04:50,123
-The Frogspawn.
-Now, that's just gross.

103
00:04:50,157 --> 00:04:52,159
Colonel Jazzhands,
The Gentleman Crawler,

104
00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:54,395
The Birthday Boy,
The Summertime Man.

105
00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:57,898
Wait, I've got it.
Look out. It's Christmas Person.

106
00:04:57,931 --> 00:04:59,199
Are you having
a brain cramp?

107
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:00,734
Why don't you do better,
then?

108
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:02,370
The Amphibarbarian.

109
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:04,037
The Amphibarbarian!

110
00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:06,607
Yeah,
that's better.

111
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,075
Where's the rest of him?

112
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:10,310
He looks like one of those
before-and-after ads,

113
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:12,880
but before the gym
and after a disease.

114
00:05:12,913 --> 00:05:14,548
You don't
have to take that.

115
00:05:14,582 --> 00:05:16,216
This man is a joke!

116
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,718
You wanna joke?

117
00:05:17,751 --> 00:05:19,219
When I've finished
with you,

118
00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:22,756
they'll have to send your teeth
to you in the mail.

119
00:05:22,790 --> 00:05:25,158
Because the teeth
will have landed far away

120
00:05:25,192 --> 00:05:27,561
and the postal service
is the most practical way

121
00:05:27,595 --> 00:05:28,896
for you to retrieve them

122
00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:31,198
and avoid the necessity
of going there on foot.

123
00:05:31,231 --> 00:05:33,033
Oh, oh!
Trash-talking time!

124
00:05:33,066 --> 00:05:36,036
Oh, yeah?
Well, I heard you train 24/7,

125
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:37,538
which I guess you have
the freedom to do

126
00:05:37,571 --> 00:05:39,873
when you don't have
any meaningful relationships.

127
00:05:39,907 --> 00:05:42,042
What?

128
00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:43,511
Being so rich
and successful,

129
00:05:43,544 --> 00:05:45,646
it must be difficult to know
whether your friends like you

130
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:47,147
for your fame
or for your lack of personality.

131
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:49,950
You know
what's really loud, Joao?

132
00:05:49,983 --> 00:05:52,152
Insecurity.
Confidence is silent.

133
00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:53,787
Just like
your empty mansion.

134
00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:55,322
Gentlemen, please!

135
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:56,557
Save it for the fight.

136
00:05:56,590 --> 00:05:59,527
Before this,
I was just gonna break you.

137
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,329
But now
I am going to end you!

138
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,699
Mr Corneille,
aren't you a little concerned

139
00:06:05,733 --> 00:06:07,401
about what Joao said?

140
00:06:07,435 --> 00:06:10,070
Yeah, shouldn't you be, like,
training instead of meditating?

141
00:06:11,605 --> 00:06:12,740
Wait a minute.

142
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:15,876
Come on!
How can you sleep

143
00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:18,412
when your opponent
is capable of this?

144
00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:21,314
That was a friendly match
against the US Navy.

145
00:06:21,348 --> 00:06:23,451
The week after that, he was
scheduled to fight Belgium.

146
00:06:23,484 --> 00:06:25,118
-Fight who in Belgium?
-The whole country.

147
00:06:25,152 --> 00:06:27,187
But they forfeited when they saw
what he did to the ship.

148
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,790
Kids, you need to relax.
I have a plan.

149
00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:31,324
We let that guy
wear himself out

150
00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:34,194
with a gruelling training
schedule while I save my energy.

151
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:37,898
I call it the art of training
without training.

152
00:06:37,931 --> 00:06:39,833
Cue montage.

153
00:06:39,867 --> 00:06:42,570
♪ Take a rest, sit down ♪

154
00:06:42,603 --> 00:06:45,038
♪ Let the other guy
do the runnin' round ♪

155
00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:47,240
♪ Take a rest, lie down ♪

156
00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:50,444
♪ Ditch the track suit
for a dressin' gown ♪

157
00:06:50,478 --> 00:06:53,013
♪ Try to relax,
don't tire yourself out ♪

158
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:55,282
♪ Avoid any form of training ♪

159
00:06:55,315 --> 00:06:57,951
♪ Like, seriously, dude,
workin' hard at stuff ♪

160
00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:00,488
♪ Is dumb and super draining ♪

161
00:07:00,521 --> 00:07:03,356
♪ Ba-da ditty,
I'm just filling time ♪

162
00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:05,659
♪ I'm not even gonna
make it rhyme ♪

163
00:07:05,693 --> 00:07:09,196
♪ But, oh, my goodness,
that bit rhymed accidentally ♪

164
00:07:09,229 --> 00:07:10,831
♪ Well,
here's the chorus again ♪

165
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:13,634
♪ Take a rest, sit down ♪

166
00:07:13,667 --> 00:07:16,770
♪ Somethin' about runnin' ♪

167
00:07:16,804 --> 00:07:18,238
Take a...

168
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:23,276
Arrgh! My neck!

169
00:07:23,310 --> 00:07:25,579
I'm sorry,
but as your trainer,

170
00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:27,715
I must tell you that you
cannot fight in this condition.

171
00:07:27,748 --> 00:07:29,116
It's just a crick
in the neck.

172
00:07:29,149 --> 00:07:31,318
No, I meant you're really
physically underdeveloped.

173
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:33,353
Which is a polite way to say
that I've seen stronger limbs

174
00:07:33,386 --> 00:07:35,155
on discarded Christmas trees
in March

175
00:07:35,188 --> 00:07:38,325
and that you're gonna get your
butt handed to you -- in an urn.

176
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:39,292
Hey, don't worry, kids.

177
00:07:39,326 --> 00:07:41,228
I've studied video footage
of Joao.

178
00:07:41,261 --> 00:07:43,597
He's got a tell-tale sign
just before he hits.

179
00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:45,098
What is it?

180
00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:48,636
He curls his fingers into a fist
and raises his arm.

181
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:51,004
Ah, come on, kids.
Lighten up.

182
00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:53,140
90% of a fight
is won in the mind.

183
00:07:53,173 --> 00:07:55,676
All you need to do
is believe in me.

184
00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:56,710
Can you do that?

185
00:07:56,744 --> 00:07:58,912
Okay.

186
00:07:58,946 --> 00:08:01,481
Hey, is this
Joao's manager?

187
00:08:01,515 --> 00:08:03,851
Yeah, this is Corneille's
team. We want to pull
out of the fight.

188
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:05,719
- What?!
- We're forfeiting.

189
00:08:05,753 --> 00:08:08,288
You can't do that
on the day of the fight!

190
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,257
Okay, I can give you
an extra $10,000.

191
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:12,560
Yep, nah,
we just want to pull out.

192
00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:16,897
Sorry,
had to make another pot.

193
00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:18,799
Listen,
this is my last offer.

194
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,401
Your guy goes down in
the first round and we
split the ticket sales.

195
00:08:21,434 --> 00:08:23,871
It's not about the
money. We just don't
want him to get hurt.

196
00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:26,907
Fine.
70% for you, 30% for me.

197
00:08:26,940 --> 00:08:28,308
- You don't understand.
- 90/10!

198
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:29,910
You're killing me here,
kid!

199
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,211
Okay, I think you're drinking
too much coffee, sir.

200
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,479
It's bad for your health.

201
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,281
Too much coffee
is bad for your health?!

202
00:08:34,314 --> 00:08:36,717
Listen, I promise
Joao will go easy on your guy.

203
00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:39,887
Then we can save your school.
Do we have a deal?

204
00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:40,954
Ok--

205
00:08:40,988 --> 00:08:42,155
Oh, come on, man!

206
00:08:42,189 --> 00:08:43,724
Sorry, I just really
didn't expect you

207
00:08:43,757 --> 00:08:45,392
to go with that last deal.

208
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,896
So it's like that,
huh?

209
00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:50,197
Look, sir,

210
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:51,799
it's not that
we don't believe in you.

211
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:53,333
It's that we know
you can't win.

212
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,534
Of course I can.

213
00:08:54,568 --> 00:08:55,736
How? Show us.

214
00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:57,938
How on Earth
are you gonna hit this guy?

215
00:08:57,971 --> 00:09:00,307
With my heart,
like this!

216
00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:06,947
Just leave me to it.
And don't bother coming.

217
00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:18,659
It's time.

218
00:09:36,343 --> 00:09:39,579
Win.
We believe in you.

219
00:09:43,951 --> 00:09:47,320
Look, Mr Corneille.
I --

220
00:09:48,989 --> 00:09:50,991
Go get him.

221
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:04,371
Kids, thank you
for believing in me

222
00:10:04,404 --> 00:10:06,239
when I didn't even
believe in myself.

223
00:10:06,273 --> 00:10:08,108
And the reason
I didn't believe in myself

224
00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:10,878
was because I knew
I was lying all along.

225
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:12,479
-Wait, what?
-I'm not a fighter.

226
00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:15,248
I just lied because
I wanted to smooch the nurse.

227
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,550
But your black eye -- you said
you got hurt in the cage.

228
00:10:17,584 --> 00:10:19,252
When I said
I walked into the cage

229
00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:21,321
I meant I walked into
the hamster cage.

230
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:23,957
I was trying to lick my elbow
after hearing it was impossible.

231
00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:27,327
You lied?
Lies are only facts
that haven't happened.

232
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:30,197
Are you insane?!
Get out of the ring!

233
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,800
No. I may not have been
a fighter when I started,

234
00:10:32,833 --> 00:10:34,434
but I am now,
thanks to your belief.

235
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,037
You saw what I did
to that wall.

236
00:10:37,070 --> 00:10:39,840
I got this.

237
00:10:41,909 --> 00:10:43,711
Ready?

238
00:10:43,744 --> 00:10:46,880
Was he talking about
that wall the inmates
dug a hole through?

239
00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:48,716
Fight!

240
00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:52,853
-Uh...
-Uh...

241
00:10:52,886 --> 00:10:54,554
-Uh...
-Uh...

242
00:10:54,587 --> 00:10:56,890
Owwwwwww.

243
00:10:56,924 --> 00:10:59,326
Well, on the plus side,

244
00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:00,393
we still get the money
to save the school.